Compared to her now she’s in question
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
He was still thinking about her as he sat in a recording studio two weeks later. It had been hard to not think about her. Whenever his mind had a little down time, it would invariably drift to thoughts of Shelby. He found himself wondering what she was up to, if she was thinking of him, too.
After the kiss, she hadn’t invited him in, and he found he’d have been disappointed if she had. Shelby was special and different, so different, from the women in his past. He had a richer, truer history with her, no matter how distant, than he’d had with anyone else. Their relationship had always been innocent. They’d been two lonely kids who’d decided to stick together. She’d always been the smart one and had tutored him in nearly everything. He had to admit it was because of her that he’d even made it to middle school.
Shelby Washington had made a hell of a difference in Nick Carter’s life, and he wondered how he could’ve forgotten her at all.
“You look like you’re thinking deep thoughts.” Brian settled into a chair next to him at the soundboard as AJ and Howie stood in the booth and harmonized on a verse of a new song.
Nick toyed with the bass and dimmed the level of AJ’s voice to let Howie’s play through. “What do you think of that sound?”
“Better. I’m glad we’re using your song.” Brian shifted his gaze from the two men behind the glass to his youngest bandmate. “So, what were you thinking about? And don’t tell me the song because I know you well enough to know you’d be lying.”
Nick leaned back and sighed. “I found an old friend of mine when I went back to Tampa a couple weeks ago. Shelby Washington.”
“Shelby, Shelby. I remember,” Brian replied. “You talked about her all the time way back when. At the very beginning. I remember teasing you about your puppy love. How’s she doing?”
Nick lifted a shoulder in response. “She’s good. Got a shop full of antiques and a cute little house. She grew up real well.”
The tone made Brian’s brows rise. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah.” Nick sighed appreciatively as he brought to mind Shelby’s taste. “I think I leapt too fast, though. I kissed her.”
“Oh. Oh.” And then, after a moment, “Oh. So, can I ask how it was?”
Nick grinned. “You can. It was like being hit by a bolt of lightning. It steamed. At least, I felt like I was steaming. She just promised to call me, said good night, and walked into her house like it hadn’t bothered her at all.”
“Did it?”
“She hasn’t said anything about it in any of the conversations I’ve had with her since. But I think it did. She walked into the door.” He grinned again. “It was cute. And a hell of an ego boost.”
Brian was quiet for a moment. “Are you going to do anything more, or do you just want to be her friend?”
“I don’t know,” Nick answered honestly after a few moments. “I definitely want her, but I want our friendship back, too. She was always important, and I’ve found myself wondering how the hell I could forget about her.”
“The industry does that to you,” Brian said simply. “Want a word of advice?”
Nick shrugged as he shot Howie and AJ a thumbs up in reply to their questioning looks. “Sure. Why not?”
“If she’s as important to you as you say, think this through carefully. I wouldn’t want you to wreck a potentially good friendship with her because the two of you broke each other’s hearts or pushed too much.” Brian laid a hand over his friend’s shoulder. “Be careful.”
“She’s unlike anyone else here, Bri,” he said quietly. “I want that to be a good thing, and, while I think it is, there are times when I wonder. We may have been friends a long time ago and are working back to it now, but our worlds are different. She owns her own business, and I travel the world. That can’t be a good foundation for a solid relationship, could it?”
Brian smiled grimly. “That’s for you to answer. But I’ll be here if you need help.”
***
Shelby wondered why she couldn’t feel guilty about the kiss. She sat across from Logan in a softly-lit restaurant and smiled when he told her he loved her. Her thoughts, though, were three thousand miles away.
With Nick.
It had been a couple of weeks since he’d left Tampa, and, yet, they spoke nearly every day. She hadn’t broached the topic of their lovely embrace, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to do so. Afraid that speaking of it would ruin the magic of the moment, she’d kept quiet and told not a soul.
With a longing made more deep and desperate because of time, she wished for Nick to come back and just hold her. One taste hadn’t been enough to quench a thirst that had lasted thirteen years, and she didn’t want to deny herself any longer.
But she was getting married in eight and a half months, and she’d continued on preparing for the wedding. Nick hadn’t made her any promises, and Logan was a wonderful man. He’d never be Nick Carter, but she wouldn’t have to worry about his feelings for her. Her fiancé was perfect in every way.
The lack then, she decided, was in her. For even when she was in Logan’s arms, her mind drifted to Nick.
