Nick sat in the darkened auditorium next to Kevin. He was there under protest. They had scheduled the auditions for the replacement for Brian.
Nick played with the indiglow button on his watch, flashing it on and off. Kevin, seeing the light flashing out of the corner of his eye, clamped his hand down on top of Nick's wrist.
"Would you knock it off? Can't you sit still for an hour?" Kevin whispered harshly at Nick.
"I don't think this is right, I mean, replacing Brian? Kev, you know how I feel about this," Nick snapped back in a heated whisper.
AJ leaned up and put his index finger to his lips. "SHHHHH."
Nick's reply was a quick flip of his middle finger back at AJ. Kevin reached up and smacked Nick in the back of the head.
"OUCH. What the hell was that for?" Nick shouted angrily at Kevin.
The commotion that was being created by the guys caused everyone in the auditorium to turn and look back at the row of seats that they were occupying. Turning red, Nick jumped up and grabbed his jacket.
"I'm outta here," he said with a crisp tone in his voice.
Everyone watched Nick storm up the aisle, slamming the theatre's heavy swinging doors and disappearing behind them.
The bright Florida sun nearly blinded Nick as he exited the darkened hall. He pulled out his sunglasses and slipped them on, never stopping. Unlocking the driver's door to his Durango, he slid in and started the engine. Nick looked into the rearview mirror in time to see Howie stepping out of the auditorium, more than likely trying to stop Nick from leaving.
As he stomped his foot on the accelerator, the tires squealed for an added statement of his anger. Today was the day that Brian was coming home. Today was the day that he did not need this laid on his shoulders.
With the stereo blaring, Nick pulled into the parking lot at the Just Like Home Center in Bradenton. This was the place Brian's parents had selected for him to stay. This was the place Nick wanted him to leave.
Nick stopped at the nurses station. "I'm here to take Brian Littrell home."
A small, feeble looking woman at the desk nervously shuffled papers around. "Oh, yes, you're the one."
"There's some papers I have to sign, could I have them please?" Nick asked, leaning over the blue countertop.
"Ah, well, um, let me call Marge," the woman stammered.
Nick started walking down the hall to Brian's room. "Just bring them down when you find the papers, Marge or both," Nick called out over his shoulder.
He walked into Brian's room to find him laying in bed, with a nurse finishing up yet another injection. Nick cursed, causing the woman to turn around quickly.
"I'm sorry, did you say something?"
Nick sighed. "I'm here to take Brian home." He walked over to the dresser and opened the drawers looking for anything of Brian's that needed to go with him. Every drawer he opened was empty.
"Well buddy, you ready to leave this hole?" Nick asked, clapping his hands together nervously.
Brian blinked.
"I take that as a yes then," Nick tried to find a little encouragement in any move that Brian made, regardless of it being uncontrolled or not.
After pulling the wheel chair up to the side of the bed, Nick pulled the covers back from Brian.
"Aww, shit, you're in a hospital gown, I forgot," Nick stated as he realized he was unprepared.
The nurse named Marge entered the room with paperwork and a hospital bag. She held the bag out to Nick.
"These are his clothes. You need to sign the papers before he can be discharged. Call me when you have him dressed," Marge turned on her heels and left the room aburptly.
"Call me when you have him dressed," Nick mocked the woman's voice. He turned his attention back towards Brian. "Well buddy, I guess it's now or never."
Nate was still having a hard time believing that he was the new Backstreet Boy. He had taken notes and had paid close attention to the person that had taught him how to conduct himself in an interview and with one on one with fans and reporters.
Sitting in the dressing room with the rest of the group, waiting to be called out for the MTV press conference, Nathan sat back in the corner, watching Nick Carter pacing in the room, occasionally picking up things and throwing them.
"I don't like this Kevin, not at all," Nick grumbled as he paced. His gaze fell on Nathan, sitting in the corner. Nathan squirmed in his chair, feeling uncomfortable.
"Nick, wouldcha just knock it off? I mean you're not being very nice to Nate here. It's not his fault that Brian had to go," AJ reprimanded.
Nick stared at Nate. "He's never gonna replace Brian. You realize this is only temporary, don't you?"
Nate shifted in his chair. He met Nick's stares but couldn't respond.
Nick laughed sarcastically. "Figured as much, you think this is permanent? Don't quit your day job."
Before anyone could respond to Nick's mean comments, a blonde-haired female stage hand entered the room.
"Hey, they're ready for ya'all right now, follow me please," the young girl gestured with her hand for them to walk out the door.
Kevin motioned for Nick to go ahead of him, making sure that he was distanced from Nathan. As they approached the table, Kevin was disappointed to see that they had placed name tags on the table and that Nathan was to be seated next to Nick at the end.
Kevin leaned forward and harshly whispered into Nick's ear. "Be professional, okay? Give the kid a break."
Nick nodded as if to say he was agreeing with Kevin. Taking his seat at the table, he had a stare-down with AJ, watching him walk towards his seat. AJ leaned towards Howie. "I have a really bad feeling about this."
Howie nodded, not saying a word.
Kevin tensed up when the camera lights went on, this was a live broadcast and he had no clue as to how Nick would behave during the show.
"Hi ya'all, Ananda Lewis, excited to give you this press interview with Nick, Howie, Kevin AJ and Nathan. Yeah, you heard me right girls, Nathan, the new additon to the BSB."
Nick's eyes narrowed as he heard Ananda say Nathan's name. He felt as if she was betraying Brian. She and Brian had gotten along so well in the past and now she was acting like Brian never existed.
"First off, rumors are running wild about the reason Brian Littrell left the group. Who wants to clear the rumors up?" Ananda asked no one in particular.
Kevin started to answer the question, but Nick overrode Kevin's voice.
"About four weeks ago Brian was in a car accident. It has taken him some time but he is slowly recovering," as Nick spoke the last sentence, he emphasized the word recovering, leaning forward and looking directly at Kevin.
"Oh, so Brian will be returning to the group then, I take it?" Ananda quizzed Nick.
"Yes," Nick replied quickly.
"No," Kevin replied at the end of Nick's reply.
Ananda looked at them, confused. "So which one is it guys?"
Kevin sighed. "As much as we would like to believe Nick's answers, it really doesn't appear at this time that Brian will be able to continue his career with us."
Ananda shook her head. "So are the rumors true then, I really hate to ask you guys, but we need to know, is Brian okay cause I heard he was in a nursing home facility.
"Brian is living with me. I'm helping him through this," Nick replied, his gaze fixed beyond the cameras.
Nick stopped listening for the rest of the interview, tuning out all of the hype over Nathan. As soon as the interview was finished, Nick jumped up from his seat, knocking it over backwards. The sooner he got out of the studios in Orlando and back to Tampa to Brian, the better.
It had been only a few days since Brian had been taken home to Nick's but he was thinking that he noticed some good, positive changes that were taking place within him. Although Brian still wasn't able to verbalize his thoughts, he was able to raise his hand up ever so slightly. Nick hadn't noticed his accomplishment yet, meaning that it was so slight that only Brian knew it was happening, but yet he was satisfied to think that at least something was happening.
Nick appeared in front of Brian's view of the television screen. "Hey buddy, are you ready to get dressed for bed?"
Brian wanted to scream out NO. He dreaded being helped to do anything. Having his friend dress and feed him humiliated Brian beyond words. Nick never complained about doing all of the chores that Brian was unable to do for himself, which was everything.
He wanted to cry that whole hour it took Nick to undress, sponge bathe and dress him again. Nick talked to him the whole time, talking about things that he did during the day when he was away and the visiting nurse was there to care for Brian.
"There, I bet that feels better, don't it?" Nick asked as he ran the gauze pad that was dipped in clean warm water over Brian's teeth. That was the closet that Brian would be able to come to having his teeth brushed.
Brian wished there were some way to communicate with Nick. Nick kept the smile on his face even when he shifted Brian into a more comfortable position in the rented hospital bed.
"There, I bet you feel good for the night." Nick lifted the covers up and pulled them up and around Brian's neck. Turning off the light, Nick's frame was silhouetted against the artifical light source coming from the living room.
"Good night Brian, see you in the morning." Nick softly closed the door behind him.
Brian woke to the sound of birds singing and the sunlight hitting him directly on the face from a slit that was in the curtain. Blinking, from the pain of the direct light, Brian waited for his pupils to adjust to the brightness of the sunlight.
A move that had been taken for granted occurred when Brian turned his head away from the offending stream of sunshine. When he heard the sound of the door opening, he then realized that he had regained control of being able to at least turn his head. He anxiously waited to see what Nick's reaction would be.
Nick was looking down at the newspaper when he entered the bedroom. He glanced up to see if Brian was awake.
"Good morning Brian, how are you feeling this morning?" Nick asked his best friend, not expecting a reply. When he walked over to the drapes and drew them back, he noticed then that Brian had turned his head towards him.
"Oh my god, Brian! It's coming back, isn't it?" Nick waited for some response. Brian just stared at him, blinking back the tears.
"They didn't believe me, but I knew it would happen, I knew it. I'm calling Dr. Johnson, she will have to come and check you out," Nick stated as he left the bedroom.
'NO! NO!' Brian silently screamed. He knew deep in his heart now that it was something this doctor prescribed that caused his paralysis. If Nick got her to come out to the house, she would be certain to give him the wrong medications again.
Brian's fears were confirmed when Nick re-entered the bedroom with the phone in his hand.
"Okay, I'll make sure he will be ready to see you this afternoon at five. Thanks Doctor Johnson." Nick clicked the phone off and placed it on the nightstand beside Brian's bed. "She's just as suprised as I am that you are coming around! She's putting a call into the home nurse and the nurse will come out sometime this morning to give you an injection to help the healing process according to Dr. Johnson. I'm so happy this is happening, Brian! I can't wait to tell Kevin. He figured this would never happen. Can you believe that? Your own cousin giving up on you so quick."
Brian's mind was racing, trying to think of what he could do to stop this from happening. He felt his heart drop at the mention of a nurse coming out to give him more medication. Brian felt that this was his only chance at communication and he silently prayed that he would be able to communicate somehow before the nurse arrived.
Trying to see if he was able to move anything else, Brian was happy to discover that he was able to move his hand. Nick noticed the movement.
"Hey! You can move your hands! Do you think you can write?" Nick asked.
Brian just stared at Nick, unable to talk. Nick decided to try a piece of paper on a clipboard and handed it to Brian.
Trying desperately to write the word "NO" on the slip of paper, Brian knew instantly he failed when Nick tried to read it. He held the paper up for Brian to see. His heart sank when he saw that there weren't any letters on the paper, only faint scribble marks.
"Relax Brian, everything's gonna be okay," Nick stated as he gently tapped Brian on the shoulder. "I wonder if you can swallow on your own yet," Nick thought out loud. "Be right back."
Brian watched Nick leave the bedroom and then he heard sounds of cupboard doors opening and closing. Nick returned to the room holding a tall glass with a straw hanging in it.
"Here, try this, let's see if you can sip it," Nick said as he held the glass under Brian's lips and placed the straw in his mouth.
Sucking on the straw, Brian got a taste of apple juice. It tasted like heaven to him. He was able to drink something on his own!
"Wow! God Brian, you're doing so good. I'm so happy." Nick commented as he happily watched Brian drink the juice.
"Hey Brian! How's it going pal?"
Nick whirled around, nearly spilling the juice on Brian when he heard AJ's voice.
AJ laughed when he saw how startled Nick was. "Hey, I let myself in with my key, I wasn't sure if you'd be tied up with Brian or not."
"Hey, Brian is drinking on his own! Watch this!" Nick put the cup under his Brian's chin and placed the straw in his mouth. Brian accepted the straw and drank as Nick commanded.
"Hey, dude! Thats pretty good!" AJ commented and started to walk out the bedroom door. "Nick, do you have coffee on yet?"
"No, go ahead and make some, you know where the stuff is," Nick called out after AJ.
Brian turned his head towards the sound of AJ and Nick walking into the bedroom, escorting the visiting nurse in.
"Hi Brian, my name is Elizabeth and Doctor Johnson wanted me to stop in and give you an injection to help you heal faster."
They watched the nurse rummage through her bag until she pulled out a syringe and a bottle of golden fluid. As she prepared an area of skin on Brian's arm, Brian started to shake his head "no" in slow, even movements.
Nick clamped a hand on Brian's shoulder. "It's okay, I know how much you hate shots, pal."
Brian wanted to scream out. Suddenly he felt the warmth enter his veins, and then total blackness overtook him.
"There, he should be good as new in no time," Elizabeth stated as she pulled the latex gloves off and tossed them into the trash basket. "Um, Dr. Johnson wanted this med to be injected every two hours, around the clock, it would make more sense if I could show you how to do this rather than having someone come out here every couple of hours. Would you be willing to learn?" Elizabeth asked Nick.
"Hey, Nick! Don't look at me, man, you know how much I hate needles. If you want to learn, you do it, I'll be behind you every step of the way," AJ replied.
Nick laughed. "Ok Mr. Tatoo Man, I'll learn how to. If Brian needs this, I will do whatever I have to to help him."
"Good, I'll stick around until his next doseage needs to be administered and show you then," she replied with a smile.
Brian awoke to discover that he could no longer swallow or turn his head. Hearing footsteps in his room, he had to wait until Nick's face came within his view and he saw that Nick was no longer with AJ, it was Dr. Johnson.
"Brian, Dr. Johnson's here to check you over," Nick stated happily. "I've told her how well you've progressed! Show her how you can move your head."
Nick and Dr. Johnson waited for Brian to turn his head. Brian just stared back at them, unable to move.
"I don't understand it, he was able to do that this morning, he was drinking from a straw and everything," Nick commented softly.
Dr. Johnson held up a vial of blue liquid and a syringe. "It was probably temporary and involuntary. This type of thing is typical with brain injury patients, I'm sorry he got your hopes up."
Brian tried to fight off the feelings of dispair that were creeping up on him as he watched the doctor prepare the syringe with a fluid that would definately keep him trapped in his silent world forever. The tears started to slip down his cheeks.
"Brian? Why are you crying? Are you hurting somewhere?" Nick asked his friend.
Before he could stop her, Dr. Johnson plunged the needle into Brian's skin, injecting the medication. Brian drifted off into unconsciousness.
"There, I will be back in another five days to readminister this medication. This will help with his central nervous system and hopefully put him on the track to getting better," Dr. Johnson lied. "Make sure he gets the other meds as prescribed, they work together. Did the nurse show you how to do it?"
Nick nodded. "I will do whatever it takes for Brian to get better."
