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When Nick arrived home from the hospital that night, he was feeling more depressed than ever before. Even with the good news about Emily’s prognosis, he still felt like dying inside. His conversation with her that night was the first time he had ever admitted that he truly needed Emily; that he couldn’t live without her. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to feel that way either, because for the most part, he liked the feeling of knowing that there was someone in his life worth waking up for. But what he didn’t like was feeling that way in addition to feeling like he was going to lose her.

The thought continuously haunted Nick’s mind despite all of his efforts to rid himself of such pessimism. Unfortunately, though, it was such a strong possibility that he almost never stopped thinking about it. Even when he slept, all his mind would allow him to grasp was Emily leaving him, and he hated it.

After looking over at his answering machine, Nick noticed that he had a new message. Apprehensively, he walked over to the table. The last time he pushed this button, his world fell apart. Nick contemplated the risk, and after considering the possibilities of who would call his house phone, he decided it would be best to listen. Since he had left three messages with Emily’s parents, he thought there was a good chance that they had returned his call. Unfortunately, he was right.

“Hi, there, Nick. This is Andy, Emily’s father.” There was a long pause on the other end of the machine, and the anticipation made Nick’s stomach sink. “We got your messages from earlier, and we do appreciate you calling. However, we do not feel that it is our responsibility to fly down to Florida and put our lives on hold because of Emily’s mistakes. She left her life here to follow you around. She made that choice. We begged her not to, but she put your first.” The voice on the line was now sounding angry and bitter. “So, her mother and I, we aren’t putting her first. If you could keep us informed, we would really appreciate it, but we see no point in flying down to Florida all the way from Michigan just to sit in a hospital room all day and do nothing. I know you’re probably thinking we’re the bad ones here, but Emily chose to go to Florida and leave her family behind for some guy who barely remembered she existed. She did this to herself. This is not our fault!”

The sound of the phone being slammed down caused Nick to jump. Emily had moved to Florida for Nick. The news was dumbfounding to him. She had always told him she had accepted a job offer and relocated due to her career. Now her lie to him and her disappointment to her family had left Emily completely alone. It was no wonder why she didn’t want to wake up.

Emily had given up everything she had and left her parents against their liking all so she could be with Nick, and he never even considered her until she nearly died. The realization of his own selfishness was doing nothing to help his already depressed state of mind. The regret he felt inside was more unbearable than ever before, and for the first time in his life, Nick seriously considered giving up.

He knew giving up would solve nothing, but it would be so much easier than feeling like less than a person. He hated who he had become over the years, and who he was now. His need to be better than everyone around him had caused a storm of trouble he was totally blind to. Now it was too late, and the damage had been done. There was nothing he could do to make Emily’s parents take back their words. There was nothing he could do to prevent her from driving down that doomed street. There was nothing he could do to wake her up, and if she did wake up, there was nothing he could do or say to make things right again. So what was the point? He would get nothing out of any of this, and in the end, he’d probably be alone.

He always had to get something out of it, though. That was Nick’s problem. If he wasn’t coming out ahead, then he wasn’t coming out at all. As this thought crossed his mind, a sense of understanding flooded his body. Emily never asked for anything from Nick, but Nick demanded the world from her. This time though, he had to give her everything and expect nothing in return. That was all he could do for her. His money or fame wouldn’t fix anything and he knew this.


Nick spent that evening looking through old pictures of when he was a child. They were pictures of when he was innocent and had no expectations for anyone or anything. All he wanted out of life was to be happy, no matter what he was doing. Now, the only way he was ever happy was when the people around him were hurt. He wondered why anyone in his life ever stuck around, especially the people that had no obligation to stay; especially Emily.

As Nick thumbed through his childhood, he stumbled upon a crinkled piece of paper that had a poem written on it. Next to the poem was a comment that read “Great choice, Nick!” It was an assignment he had once been given in school. For a moment, Nick was back in time, eleven years old and clueless. He was supposed to choose a poem that meant something in his life. This old piece of paper was his choice. A poem by Stephen Foster, called Beautiful Dreamer.

Nick remembered the assignment and he remembered his reason for picking it. It was about friendship. At the time, he had felt like he had no real friends. He felt like he had no one he could trust and no one he could turn to, and this poem was a sincere tale of friendship. This was something Nick wanted more than anything, but his peers never gave him a chance because they were too busy teasing him about singing and acting. Suddenly, Nick’s feelings of lonesomeness came full circle. When he was truly all alone, all he wanted was someone to be there for him. Now, he had plenty of people that cared about him, and he pushed them away every chance he got.
To no surprise of his own, the night was long and lonely for Nick. All he wanted was to be with Emily.


When Nick arrived at the hospital that day, he was pleasantly surprised to see his four band mates waiting to go inside Emily’s room. Brian, Kevin, Howie and A.J. had all vowed to return for another visit within the week, and as promised, they were back.

“Hey guys. I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” Nick confessed.

“Well, we said we’d come back. We all wanted to make sure Emily was ok,” Kevin replied.

“Yea, someone has to check up on you and make sure you’re taking care of her,” Brian joked and everyone lightly chuckled.

“We’re really proud of you Nick,” Howie confessed. “The way you’ve stepped up and have been there for Emily, it’s a really good of you to do.”

“Thanks,” Nick blushed. “It’s the very least I can do though. I wish I could do more.”

“You’ll get your chance, Nick. Don’t worry.” Kevin’s words were reassuring and Nick secretly hoped he would be right.

Moments later, the five men walked into Emily’s room, still surrounded by now half-inflated balloons reading “Get Well Soon!” They spent the next few hours talking about anything that came up, anything that would keep their minds off of the unknown fate of the woman that lay before them. Though everyone acted nonchalant, the fear that filled the room on a daily basis was impossible to ignore. With every glance towards her and every mention of her name, the thought of Emily slipping away hovered within their minds, taunting them like bullies on a playground.

Nick tried with all of his might to remain focused on the four men that came to support him and his endangered best friend, but all he could really care about was the girl that captured his lonesome mind and heart. Every chance Nick had, he would aimlessly stair at her face, hoping her eyes would open so he could see the sparkle that once lived. He would find himself reminiscing about his past with her, and all the hugs they shared together. All he wanted was that time back. He wanted to hold her again, but this time, he wouldn’t let go. He wanted to be her bridge over troubled water. He just wanted to love her.

“Nick? Nick?! Yo!” The voice kept calling out until finally Nick noticed.

“Huh?” He looked up feeling slightly startled.
Kevin informed him, “You’re kind of off in another world there, buddy. Are you ok?”

“Yea, I’m fine. I was just thinking…”

“About Emily?” Brian prodded.

Nick slightly chuckled, “Maybe a little.”

“It’s alright if you think about her, Nick. We know how you feel. You don’t have to try and hide it from us,” Howie enlightened Nick.

“Whatever you say, D,” Nick laughed again, but refused to deny the allegation.

The boys joked around a few minutes longer and eventually said their goodbyes. Again, they all promised to return to see Emily soon, but hoped they wouldn’t have to. Upon their exit, Nick was once again greeted with his expected feeling of lonesomeness. He sat down in the chair on the right side of Emily’s bed, directly in front of the sun-filled window. He positioned his chair so he could see her face, and quickly drifted off to sleep. For some reason, the only time Nick could peacefully sleep was when he was in Emily’s room.

For the next two hours, doctors and nurses filed in and out of the hospital room, politely avoiding any disturbance to Nick. Over the last week, all of Emily’s nursing staff had become aware of Nick’s inability to sleep at night. It was a conscious decision on the staff’s part to work quickly and quietly to avoid waking him, and he was always very grateful of their kindness.
Sam, however, was not so kind. She loved waking Nick up, despite the fact that she knew he hadn’t been sleeping much. The anger it ensued in him provided her with a moment of humor that was well worth Nick’s undesired sacrifice.

“Wake up, Sunshine!” Sam yelled, fully intending to irritate Nick.

Grumpily, Nick opened his eyes and glared at Sam. “Do you always have to wake me up on the few occasions that I actually sleep?”

“Yes, yes I do. It gives me great pleasure,” she teased.

“I’m beginning to understand why you and Emily are such great friends. She never let me sleep either, especially if the sun was visible. It’s a crime or something, I don’t know.”

They both laughed and Nick stared at the bright sun, hoping it would wake him up a little more.

“So have you heard anything?” Sam asked.

Nick looked at her confused, “About what?”

“Emily’s parents?”

Until that very moment, Nick had forgotten about the message still saved on his answer machine. He had been hoping it was all a dream, but obviously, it wasn’t.

“Yea…” Nick unsurely said, pausing afterward.

Sam gave him a puzzled look, wondering where the conversation would go. “And…?”

He sighed heavily, dreading this moment beyond comprehension. “Her dad called last night while I was here. He left a message,” Nick paused again. “He said that he and his wife didn’t feel that it’s their responsibility to put their lives on hold because of her mistakes.”

“What?!” Sam asked in shock.

“He said that it was her choice to move to Florida to follow around some guy that usually forgot she existed. That was her mistake…” He remembered the words, and remembered the pain. “They don’t feel obligated to come down here because they think she made a mistake. Because she cared about me…”

“Oh Nick…” Sam had known that Nick was the reason Emily moved to Florida, but she was sworn to secrecy. Now that it was out in the open, she wanted to confront the topic, but the crushed look on Nick’s face forced her to carefully evaluate her words before actually speaking.

“Nick… She never regretted that decision.”

He looked up. “You knew?” He asked, completely surprised.

“Yea, I knew. I wanted to tell you so badly but I promised her I never would. I couldn’t, Nick. I’m sorry.”

Nick sighed again, unsure of what to say.

“She loves you, Nick. The way that you dream of being loved, that’s how she loves you. I know she would never take back that choice because for some reason, Nick, she would do anything for you. Up until the last few weeks, you’ve never deserved that from her. At least not in my opinion, but she would never deny you of anything. Her parents,” she paused again, thinking of how to phrase her analysis, “they’re strange people. They get these ideas in their heads and fail to see the flaws in their words. I don’t know if they’ll change their minds, but she left them for you for a reason. That has to mean something to you…”

Nick looked Sam straight in the eyes, “It means everything to me.”


It was now 8:30 and Sam had since left. Nick was contemplating his next actions for the last hour, but finally, he decided that there was no point in fearing his own feelings or Emily’s potential rejection.

“I found something last night. It was from school, when I was in fifth grade. It reminded me of you. I just thought it was strange that all these years later, something from when I was eleven could relate to you and me now. I love this poem, and I want you to hear it, but I need to you to understand it. I know you will; you always do.”

Nick smiled at her as he read the words to the poem.

Beautiful dreamer, wake unto me,
Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee;
Sounds of the rude world heard in the day,
Lull'd by the moonlight have all pass'd away!

Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song,
List while I woo thee with soft melody;
Gone are the cares of life's busy throng.

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!
Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful dreamer, out on the sea,
Mermaids are chaunting the wild lorelie;
Over the streamlet vapors are borne,
Waiting to fade at the bright coming morn.

Beautiful dreamer, beam on my heart,
E'en as the morn on the streamlet and sea;
Then will all clouds of sorrow depart,

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!


He finished the poem and stared at the angel that lay before him, “I need you to wake up, Em. I need you.”




Beautiful Dreamer
By: Stephen Foster