December 12, 2002

“AJ… are you awake?”

AJ cracked one eye open to find Nick standing before him through his shades. He took a deep breath in and sighed heavily, “What do you think Nick? If me sitting here with my eyes closed doesn’t mean I’m sleeping, then I don’t know what the hell does.”

“Well, how was I suppose to know you were sleeping? It’s not like I can see your closed eyes through those damn sunglasses, which I’m wondering why you’re wearing it anyway when there’s no sun?”

AJ turned his head slightly to look out their frosted bus window to find what Nick said was true, the sun had setted long ago, leaving them to drive in the darkness, the street lights being their only light source. “These lights are too bright.” he finally said as he tried to fall back to sleep.

Nick looked up at the lights that illuminated the bus. “Are you a bat or something?”

“Nick was there a reason why you woke me up or are you just trying to test my patience?” AJ asked him in a monotone voice, keeping his eyes closed the whole time.

“I wanted to know if you seen my Madden game by any chance.”

AJ lolled his head down to peer over his glasses at Nick, “You woke me up to ask me if I seen a damn football game?”

“Well, yeah… both Brian and I are bored and we wanted to play Madden but I can’t find it.”

AJ sighed heavily again, “Why don’t you two do something else… like bug Kevin or Howie or something.”

“Kevin’s on the phone and Howie’s playing with his hair. Look Jay, it was a simple yes or no question, and the faster you can give me an answer the faster you can go back to sleep.”

“Okay then, no.” AJ simply replied. “Now can I go back to sleep?”

Nick continued to stare at the older man before him, irritated with the way he was acting. “You know AJ, you can be a real ass sometimes.” he said before he walked towards the back of the bus where Brian was.

AJ opened his eyes to watch Nick walk away. He’s been short tempered with everyone lately, and he didn’t know why. His mind began to wander back to how he used to treat the fellas when he was high on drugs and drunk on alcohol. He’d always try to drag them down with him, and if they refused to do down he’d always push them away, act out on them so they would hate him, because in his mind at that time no one loved him, not even himself, he wanted everyone to hate him so it would give him an excuse to take a shot or take a hit. He wasn’t suppose to be that way anymore, he found the love of his fan, friends and family.

Sighing heavily, he pushed himself up from the couch and made his way towards the back of the bus where Nick and Brian were. “Hey Nick,” he started, taking off his sunglasses as he addressed him. “I’m sorry for how I acted, I guess I’m just…” he fell silent, trying to think of an excuse, but that was just it, there was no excuse, “there’s no excuse for me being an ass all the time, and I’m sorry.”

Nick just stared at him, shocked at the fact that he had approached him to apologize. AJ has a hard time admitting he’s at fault whenever he is, and having him apologize took him by surprise. Nick gave a small smile, “Don’t even worry about it man, I shouldn’t have called you an ass in the first place.”

AJ returned the smile, “No dude, you’re right… I can be a real ass, and I shouldn‘t be that way.” he extended his hand out to him, “We cool?”

Nick accepted his outstretched hand and shook, “Of course Jay.”

AJ curved his lips up in a grin, “Okay cool.” he turned and started to walk back to the front of the bus but stopped, “By the way, your game is in the console already.”

Nick gave him a confused look at first but turned to his game system and had opened it, finding what AJ said to be true. He looked back up at AJ who was simply smiling at him, “I was playing it last night.” he said before he continued walking to the front of the bus.

Nick looked down at the system again and just laughed, “Of all places to look, why the hell didn’t we look here?”

Brian chuckled as well, watching AJ walk back to where he came from. “What was that all about?”

“What was what all about?”

“With AJ.”

Nick glanced back at AJ, who was now wide awake and talking to Kevin. “I had asked him where my game was and he was just being a complete asshole.”

“You apologize for calling him an ass only to call him an asshole this time?” Brian laughed.

Nick playfully pushed Brian, “Shutup man, I was explaining to you what happened since you asked.”

“But AJ… admitting he’s wrong and apologizing for it… that’s a first.”

“No,” Nick shook his head, looking over at AJ as he spoke to Brian, “He’s trying… we’re just not seeing it. We’re not even giving him credit for doing just that when he deserves it… right?”

Brian smiled warmly at his best friend and nodded, “Yeah, he is.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Did D. get out of the bathroom yet?” AJ asked Kevin.

Kevin looked over to the closed door and chuckled, “I’m afraid not.”

AJ got up from where he was sitting and made his way over to the bathroom. “Howie.” he called out as he began knocking on the door.

“Yes?” Howie replied.

“Are you building a club house in there or something?”

“If you really want to know, I’m straightening my hair… why do you ask?”

“Because you’ve been in there for a good hour or so and there’s other people on this bus that need to use the bathroom ya know.”

“I’m almost done.”

“That’s what you said 20 minutes ago!” Nick shouted from the back.

AJ sighed and placed his head on the closed door. “Howie c’mon man…”

“What do you gotta do?”

“What else do people do in the bathroom? I gotta drain the main vein man!”

“Give me five more minutes.”

“Howie, I ain’t got no five minutes.” AJ replied through clenched teeth as he bounced up and down, willing for the pressure in his bladder to go away. “Please, can I use it real quick, I promise I’ll be fast so you can go back to playing with your hair and manicuring your nails.”

After a moment of silence the door finally swung open, revealing an unimpressed Howie. “Smartass” he muttered as he walked out of the bathroom.

“Thank you sweetheart.” AJ cracked in a feminine tone as he quickly made his way into the bathroom Howie once occupied to relieve himself.

Howie rolled his eyes as he made his way over to Kevin, who was situating himself down where AJ once was. “How much longer?”

Kevin glanced out the frosty window. “I don’t know,” he replied with a shrug, “maybe a few more miles give or take.”

Howie nodded and sat down across from him, gazing out the frosty window as well. “It’s gonna start snowing soon.”

“I know,” Kevin shivered. “even with these damn heaters on I’m still freezing my ass off.”

“Hopefully we’ll reach the hotel before it starts to snow.”

“Yeah…” Kevin muttered, looking back out the window again. “It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…” he began singing, causing them both to chuckle.

All of a sudden the bus took a sharp turn, throwing them all off guard. Kevin lurched forward into their small dining table, while Howie was tossed to the ground. They both held on tightly to whatever they could as the bus now began to swerve. After what seemed like forever, the bus finally came to a screeching stop. Everything remained silent, the only thing audible was their heavy breathing.

“What happened?” Howie asked Kevin with wide eyes as he picked himself up from the ground.

Kevin slowly released the tight grip he had on the table, “I don’t know.” he panted out. “Is everyone alright?”

Both Brian and Nick walked up from the back of the bus, both looking confused and scared. “Yeah, what in the hell happened?”

Kevin shrugged, “I don’t know…” he looked around, finally realizing that it was only the four of them there, AJ was still in the bathroom. “AJ… are you alright?”

“Fucking shit.” they heard from behind a closed door. They all looked over towards the bathroom where they seen the door fly open, revealing AJ who was zipping up his pants. “Why does this happen when I go to use the bathroom, why?” AJ asked in an exasperated tone, talking to himself.

“Um… Jay, are you okay?” Nick slowly asked.

“Just peachy Nick.” AJ replied, looking his pants over to see if he peed on himself when the bus swerved. “Of course flying forward and slamming my head into the wall was really fun, ya’ll should try it one day.”

“Your forehead is bleeding.” Nick simply said, pointing to AJ’s head.

AJ rose his hand to his forehead and felt his fingertips come in contact with a cool, thick liquid. He brought his hand down and seen blood for the first time. “Shit.” he muttered out, walking back into the bathroom, only to pop back out. “The bus isn’t moving, right?”

They all shook their heads no, remaining silent, sort of still in shock. Kevin finally snapped out of his daze and turned around to make his way over to where the driver was. He found their driver digging around near his seat, looking for something. “What the hell happened Paul?”

“There was something out in the road.” he answered, not even turning to look back at Kevin. “I’m sorry guys, if I didn’t swerve we would’ve hit it straight on.”

Brian walked up behind his cousin, watching Paul dig around, still looking for something. He walked down to steps of the bus and had glanced out the opened door, “Something or someone?” he asked no one in particular as he looked back at Kevin and Paul, noticing that Paul had found what he was looking for, a flashlight.

Kevin gave his cousin a puzzled look, “What do you mean something or someone?”

“I think we almost hit a kid.”