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"Bye Brian!" Adelynn waved out of the car window.

"Bye sweetie, come back soon!" Brian waved back at us, as we sped off in the car.

I rolled the window back up, and got myself situated in the backseat of the car.

"Daddy, I like you sitting back here with me..." Adelynn said, randomly.

I just laughed at her, "Do ya?"

She nodded, and got back to playing her little video game.

"Daddy, is it gonna be a long drive?"

"Not too long, we just have to go to the airport."

"Are we gonna see Stephanie?" she asked.

I just sighed. I really didn't know what to tell her. I wanted to see Stephanie again, and not just for me, but for Addy, too. She had just gotten to know her and started to like her. And I didn't want to think about Steph anymore, I was trying to just forget. Addy kept bringing her up.

"I dunno, baby, I really don't know."



We arrived home and my mom was over at my house, playing with the dog for us. She had been coming over to feed her and play with her and stuff.

"Grandma!" she ran over to my mom and gave her a big hug.

"Hey, I didn't know you were coming back today..." she let go of Addy and came over to greet me.

"Yeah, well, I figured I should take Addy home. She was missing her room, and her stuff."

"Well, I'm glad your home. Your not going anywhere for the holidays, are you?" she asked, with a look of concern.

"No, no, I'll be home. We have a couple radio shows to do and then we're home for a month."

"We've been missing you, Alex."

I just nodded, "I know, I know."

I took out my cigarettes from my back pocket, "Sorry, mom. I gotta have a smoke. You know I barely ever smoke around Addy and I've dealt with the whole freakin' plane ride and the way home."

She just chuckled and shook her head, "I wish you'd quit."

I raised my eyebrow, "Me too."

I walked out the back door to stand on my balcony and have a smoke. I sucked in as much as I could, and just let it exhale out of me.

The holidays were gonna suck this year. Last year I had Amanda, whether I wanted her or not. Atleast I had somebody. And to be honest, I missed Amanda sometimes. I always wished maybe she would call, to say 'hey.' 'Cuz I sure as hell never would. But if she called me first, I'd answer the phone.

Atleast it was somebody. I hated being alone. And it was going to be fucking Christmas. Christmas Eve always sucked by myself. Getting the presents ready for Addy alone, trying to get her to go to sleep by myself. It was depressing. Your not supposed to be alone Christmas Eve. Atleast I had Addy, I always thought about that. I could be completely alone.

I sighed and let more smoke flow out between my lips.

Maybe Mom would sleep over Christmas Eve. Her husband and her could sleep over, it wouldn't be a big deal. I shrugged to myself, and threw my cigarette off the balcony into the bushes below.

I opened up the door, and then closed it behind me. "Mom..." I asked.

"Yeah?"

"You and Tim want to stay over on Christmas Eve? I mean... you can help me, you know, w-r-a-p," I had to spell the words so Addy wouldn't know what I was saying, "the p-r-e-s-e-n-t-s."

She laughed, "Of course we will, if you want me to."

I shrugged, "I dunno, it's better than being alone."

She placed a hand on my shoulder, "Your doing such a good job, Alex. You really are. I want you to always remember that."

I just smiled genuinely. Sometimes I didn't feel like I was doing a good job.