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“Hey JayJay?” I plopped, next to him, on his couch.

“Hey. How’d the counseling session go, this afternoon?” He flipped off the TV and turned to face me, as I opened a can of soda.

“Well…the session kind of sucked. Kevin and Nick got into it. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about, actually. Nick said something to Kevin about this girl…Ashley.” After I said that name, AJ’s eyes went wide.

“No…uhuh…we are NOT…no…drop it.” He shook his head, standing up and heading for the kitchen.

“But my dad mentioned her in his journal…several times! Who is she?” I followed him and continued to press for answers. He sternly looked at me, before pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“I’m not talking about it, BayBay. And, you would be wise NOT to bring her up, in front of Nick. If he brought her up in the session, that already means he’ll be pissy for a week. You start asking questions and…well…just don’t okay?” AJ’s eyes looked almost saddened.

“Well…obviously something happened.”

“Just drop it, Baylee.”

“Hey guys!” Nick called, coming through front door and around into the kitchen. He looked at AJ and then at me. “What’s going on?”

“I was just asking AJ about your…” I was really going to just ask! I mean, how bad could it really be? But, I didn’t get to finish because AJ interrupted me.

“ABOUT your thoughts…on me…proposing…to Riley.” AJ searched for a cover story. Okay…so whatever happened with Ashley MUST be pretty big. But, was AJ serious about proposing?!?

“Are you…” Nick leaned forward, looking into AJ’s eyes. “…you’re serious! Oh my GOD, Alexander James!” Nick rushed up to him, pulling him into a huge hug. “I can’t believe…I mean…it’s finally happening! Good for you!” Nick’s smile was bright and genuine, as AJ blushed a bit.

“I looked at rings, with mom, a couple days ago.” AJ snickered, “I think she’s more excited than I am! Anyways…” AJ reached into his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box. “…I picked it up today.”

“Holy shit! This is gorgeous, AJ!” Nick gasped, when he opened the box. “She’s going to LOVE it!”

“I hope so…I had to have it specially made and it cost me extra to get it done so quickly. Do you think…I mean…will she…?” AJ looked stressed, as he turned his gaze to the floor.

“Don’t worry, man, I’m sure she’ll say ‘yes’. You guys are perfect for each other.” Nick’s eyes showed an odd mixture of emotions. I saw pure happiness AND sadness in his eyes, as he smiled at AJ.

“Yeah, JayJay…everyone knows you guys are crazy about each other.” I piped up, as Nick handed me the box. I opened the top and my eyes widened. The ring was amazing. It was braided white and yellow gold…It had a large oval diamond in the middle, two smaller oval diamonds on each side, of it, and five more diamonds inlayed on each side of the band…that’s thirteen diamonds! “This ring is awesome!” I gave him a wide grin.

“Seriously? You guys think so? I wasn’t really sure what she’d like…so I just…kinda…made it up.” AJ shrugged, as he started to pace the floor.

“How are you going to ask her? Are you going to go all romantic on her?” I ask, grabbing an apple, off the counter, and sitting back in the chair.

“No…if I go all romantic and everything…she’ll suspect something. I was just…thinking…I was planning to ask her, as soon as she got home.”

“You’ll catch her completely off guard! That’s a great idea AJ…I think…” Nick was cut off, by the sound of the front door opening.

“Here goes…” AJ drew in a deep breath. His hands were visibly shaking and he was obviously nervous. Nick walked over by me as Riley came into the room.

“Is everything okay? Alex, sweetie, what’s wrong?” She was instantly by his side, with a concerned look on his face.

“Uh…Ri…I um…” he looked at her, biting his lip. “I uh…”

“Alex? What is it? What’s wrong?” She pressed, glancing back and me and Nick.

“Ri…Baylee’s got something…that’s for you.” He swallowed hard, looking back at me. I had forgotten that the little velvet box was still in my hand. Riley walked towards me, coming to stand in front of me. She looked at me, with confusion, as I saw AJ get down on one knee, behind her.

“It’s right here.” I whispered softly, holding out my hand.

“What’s this?” She looked at me, then opened the box, gasping. “Alex?!?” She whipped around, gasping again, when she saw him on one knee. Her hand flew to her mouth, as her breathing visible picked up. He reached up and took a hold of her hands.

“Ri…” he licked his lips, as Nick and I watched with anticipation. “I know that we don’t say those words. But I can’t do it anymore…” he let out a sigh, shaking his head “…I have to tell you that I love you…and not just once…but every day, every hour, all the time…because Riley…I really do love you with everything in me. Please? Please let me say those words? I can’t breathe without you, anymore…without you in my life…I’d only be half a man because you are what makes me complete. Riley?” He swallowed hard, letting out a deep breath. “Will you marry me?” Riley just stood there, staring at him, for a few moments and AJ’s eyes remained locked, with hers.

“I…I…” Riley finally tried to speak, but didn’t seem to be able, to find her voice. She dropped, to her knees, throwing her arms around his neck and finally blurted. “I love you too, Alexander! So very much!” She leaned in, to kiss him, making me scrunch my nose.

“Is that a ‘yes’?” Nick piped up, raising a brow. He never was the patient type, you know. Riley chuckled, and looked to AJ, who still had a questioning look, in his eyes. Riley looked at the floor, before meeting AJ’s gaze again.

“It’s not a ‘yes’…” Riley said quietly, shaking her head, causing AJ’s face to fall. “…it’s a ‘hell yes’! Hell FUCK yes! A million times over, yes!” I watched, as Riley threw herself into AJ’s arms. The smiles, on their faces, were wide and full of happiness.

The happy moment was short lived, though, and before I knew it…I was back, home. I sat in my desk chair, near the window. My feet were resting on the window’s cushioned seat, my hands holding my dad’s journal, but my brain was somewhere, all together, different. I stared at the journal’s pages, but couldn’t focus enough to read.

My mind drifted, to Morgan. What was she doing, right now? Why is she pushing me away? You know…she, at least, still talks to Sean! She won’t hang out with him anymore, but she talks to him in school. I don’t get it. She completely ignores me now, like I don’t even exist! It just doesn’t add up.

Another thing that doesn’t add up…is this mess with Kevin. He seems to be the stem of so many issues. What did he do to this Ashley girl? Who was she? I mean, my dad talks about her in his journal…I know she was dating Nick…but what does Kevin have to do with it? And, why is it such a forbidden subject? AJ was right about Nick being cranky, because, as soon as we left, his mood changed. He wasn’t angry…more sad, than anything. There are some serious skeletons, in the closets, around here. I have to figure out what’s going on! It’s driving me crazy, that I am in the middle of everything, yet I know nothing. How can that be?

Being in the middle, of all this crap, sucks and I know Mason feels it too. I feel so bad for my little cousin. He lost his mom because of all this…still, neither of us know what ‘all this’ even is! I can relate to the confusion he feels…hell, I’ve felt it myself. Losing a parent…being thrown under someone else’s care…not having a clue, why it’s all happening to you. How is this fair, to us? We’re just kids, people! Technically, I’m a teenager…but, you know what I mean. I can’t even handle this, and I’m five years older than he is. He needs someone to confide in. I try to be there, but he doesn’t really open up to me…he needs someone that he can fully open up to…someone like Morgan.

This brings me back to her…

“Screw this!” I huff, standing to my feet. I rush out of my room, snatching my zip down hoodie, on the way out. I put an arm into my sweatshirt, as I start running down the stairs. Rounding the corner, I holler at Nick, telling him I’ll be back later. He raises a brow at me, asking where I’m going.

“I can’t take it anymore, Nick…I gotta talk to her.” I look at him, pleadingly. His eyes lock with mine and I expect him to start in, on his overprotective mode.

“Baylee…if you’re there, after it gets dark, call me and I’ll come pick you up. I don’t want you walking home, by yourself, in the dark.” He nods his head, showing his approval. I was floored…there was no argument? No yelling? No fight?

“Thanks Nick.” I look at him, and give a weak smile. Maybe he did understand, after all. I practically ran, all the way, to Morgan’s apartment. My breathing is rapid, as I knock on the door. I wait only a moment before I knock again, with more urgency. As I raise my hand, to knock, again, the door opens.

“Baylee?” I find myself face to face, with Lisa.

“Where is she?”

“She’s not here, hun. Morgan spent the night at Tori’s house.” She smiles sweetly, at me, and I just nod. Turning around, I slowly head back home, as it starts getting really dark. Off, in the distance, I see storm clouds rolling in and hear the faint rumble, of thunder. Perfect. How fitting! I still took my time, heading home, and ended up getting caught in the rain. At least, it was a fairly warm rain.

“You okay, Bay?” Nick questions, as I enter the house. I just shrug my shoulders, peeling off my wet sweatshirt and t-shirt, before heading up the stairs. After closing and locking my door, I change into a pair of pajama pants. As I collapse on my bed, a single tear of frustration trails down my cheek.