Howie hadn’t been standing against the wall in the hallway for too long, but it felt like an eternity. The anxiety was getting to him, especially, since they hadn’t given him a lick of information ever since they’d kicked him out. He’d looked back to see all kinds of nurses crowding Millie; her eyes closed the whole time.

What the hell was happening? Were they ok?

He was thankful that all his friends were in the waiting room with him, even if he was too spaced out to greet them.

“Hey D!” Brian patted his shoulder and stood by him in silence.

Howie let out a frustrated sigh and ran a hand over his pale face. “They haven’t even came out to say anything. I’m dying here!”

Brian really didn’t know what to tell his friend to make him feel better. “Everything is in God’s hands D. It will all be ok. You gotta have faith.”

“How do you carry so much faith. I’ve lost it.” His eyes were full of sorrow as he looked up at Brian. “I left all my faith in God when they pushed me out that door. Why couldn’t she just have a normal pregnancy…a normal delivery? Why can’t they find out what’s wrong with her?”

A timid voice interrupted them, “Maybe you should take a seat.” AJ was looking everywhere, but into Howie’s eyes. He felt so guilty for what was happening to Millie.

“This is all your fault. You actually have the nerve to talk to me. Millie is going to die because of YOU!”

AJ sighed heavily, “I know and I’m sorry. I…she insisted that we go. If you would have seen the look on her face, you would have given in too D. You know that I love you guys and I would never…”

Howie pressed his hands against AJ’s chest and shoved him out of the way. “I want you to leave! GO! Get out of here…because if she dies Alex…I’ll hate you forever.”

AJ stumbled back and bowed his head in defeat. He knew his friend was already too upset to understand. “I’m sorry.” He mumbled and headed out the sliding doors.

“Don’t you think you were a little---” Brian started.

Howie stuck his hand up and nodded. “Don’t even justify him Brian.”

“I’m not justifying him, but any of us could have given in to Millie’s pleads to get out of bed. Any of us.”

Howie’s eyes fell upon the doctor that was making his way towards them. His hands started shaking and his heart was drumming in his chest. The doctor hadn’t fully approached the twosome before Howie spoke.

“Are they ok?” It was almost a whisper.

“Your baby girl is healthy. 6 pounds 9 ounces. Her name is Mila…Millie picked it.“ The doctor slowly removed his scrub cap. Howie’s breathing elevated and his heart was drilling through his ribs; or so it felt like it. Everyone stood from their chairs, but stayed in place.

AJ walked back into the room and kept his distance. He knew the news wasn’t good when Howie fell to his knees and covered his face. Pain struck him right in the chest and he realized that he’d lost his best friend. She was gone. Millie was gone.

Howie could feel his whole body shaking as he cried. How could this happen to him? Why had she left him? For an instant he’d wished it was the baby. They could have had another baby once she was better.

“Millie…” He cried.

“I’m really sorry Mr. Dorough. I promise that we tried to stop her from seizing, but it just didn’t work. We were barely able to save Mila. She’s beautiful and said that you would take good care of her.”

Howie sniffled and with Brian’s help got back on his feet. “She spoke to you?”

“Yeah, very quickly. She got to see her daughter and asked us to tell you everything would be fine. We thought everything was under control, but when we went to drain out the placenta…it caused a seizure.”

The tears stopped and Howie caught a glimpse of AJ. “You killed her!” he shouted charging and him and knocking him to the floor. AJ didn’t fight back he just laid there, while Howie took out his anger. “This is all your fault…she’s gone.”

“It’s ok…you can take it on me.”

Kevin took hold of Howie and dragged him off AJ. He was huffing and puffing with anger and bawling like a child. “I gotta home.” he muttered and started for the door.

AJ ran after him. “Aren’t you going to see her…” Howie shoved him out of the way, but AJ tagged along. “What about the baby? She needs you Howie. You can’t leave her here alone.”

Howie came to a swift halt and glared up at AJ, “You so concerned about that baby…then you go care for her. I don’t want her. She took Millie from me.” once again she pushed past AJ and continued to walk.

Brian and Kevin joined AJ outside. “We just need to give him some space. He’s grieving.” Brian said with a sigh.

“I’m going to see the baby and Millie. Someone try to convince him about coming back…please.” AJ stormed back into the hospital. The nurse led him down the hall and through some doors. She stopped and gave him a moment to breath before entering the room where Millie was. He nodded that he was ready to go in.

The room was cold and empty. Nothing but the body on the table covered by a sheet. The tears started instantly as he slowly walked towards her. “Millie…I’m so sorry…Millie.” With a deep breath he placed his hand on the end of the sheet and slowly lifted it up, exposing her pale face.

“They just left her here…” The voice startled AJ, but he couldn’t help smiling as he watched Howie walk towards him. “She’s so pale…my Millie…” He broke into a sob and scooped up Millie’s body towards him. It pained AJ to see Howie in so much distress, he would have given his own life to bring her back.

The nurse entered the room and cleared her throat. “I’m sorry. We have to clear the room.” Her cheeks were red with embarrassment.

“Come on D. We have to go.” He placed his hands on Howie’s shoulder, but he didn’t budge. He kept crying and rocking Millie. “Um…we need to see Mila.”

“I don’t want to leave her alone. She’s cold. Where are you taking her?”

The nurse was probably not permitted to answer that question, because she responded with an apology and started rolling things out of the room. Howie finally resigned and carefully put Millie back on the table and turned to look at AJ. “I can’t take care of a baby alone. I don’t know what to do. Where to start?”

“Come on…we will worry about that after we see her.” He placed an arm over Howie’s shoulder and guided him out the door. Neither one of them had the guts to look back, so they walked out and continued down the hallway towards the nursery.

There were several newborn beds, but only four were occupied. The two men scanned the names and their eyes fell upon a sleeping baby girl in her pink hat and booties. Howie instantly smiled as he pointed at her. “She’s so tiny.”

A nurse peaked her head from inside and smiled. “You must be daddy Dorough. Would you like to come in?”

He instantly looked over at AJ and then followed the older lady inside where he got dressed to walk into the nursery. Right away he remembered Millie and pain seared through his chest. He realized that, that exact pain would hit him every time that he thought of her, for a very long time.

The friendly nurse came back with a tiny bundle in her hands and placed it carefully into Howie’s arms. He was nervous, but didn’t say a word. He just stared at the tiny baby cradled in his arms. Her eyes lazily opened and she twisted her tiny mouth into a pout. “She looks just like her mother. Hi Mila…” his voice cracked. “I’m not sure how to do this…but I promise I will try my best to take care of you.”

He brushed his lips against her forehead and then scooped her up so that AJ could see from outside. “That’s your uncle AJ. He already loves you just as much as I do. He’s going to help us get through baby girl. We’ll get through this.”

~~Three months later~~

“Come on baby spit it out…you can do it!” Rachel yelled at AJ that was trying his hardest to adjust the seed in his mouth. He wanted to win this seed spitting contest just as bad as the chubby kid next to him.

Howie couldn’t help laughing at his best friend looking like a dork with his cheeks puffed up ready to spit out the seed and his watermelon shaped hat over his head. AJ pouted and blew out the seed, but it only fell a couple of inches away. He huffed like a child and gave the kid a ’don’t mess with me’ look. “Next year kid! Hey wait…we still have to buy a watermelon. You know the auction.”

Rachel and Howie both groaned. They knew just how much AJ loved to shop, they just didn't imagine he'd be interested in watermelons. He grabbed the twosome and they started for the tent where the auction was taking place. Music played in the background and Howie's stomach somersaulted as he heard the Taylor Swift song blaring through the speakers.

He’s the reason for the teardrops on my guitar…

The pang returned to Howie’s chest, but by now he knew how to control it. He knew that there would always be something or someone that would remind him of her. That the pain of losing her would never go away. Because he’d always have Mila who was just like her.

“Mr. Dorough, I’ve been looking all over for you. I was delighted when my momma said you were here. It’s been a long time.” The man was smiling and at the same time he was frowning. “I heard about your girlfriend. She was a sweet thing, but I see she left you a little gift.” The man stared at the sleeping baby.

Howie looked down at his chest as if he didn’t know what the man was looking at. “Oh…yeah. This is Mila.”

The man patted him on the back, “I knew you guys was in love the first time I saw ya. No matter how bent out of shape you were, you two were smiling bright around each other. Anyways, I just approached you to thank you for coming back down to the Watermelon Thump and spreading the word. We are excited to have you guys performing tomorrow night.”

The baby let out a cry and started wiggling about in her baby kangaroo. “I’m sorry she must be tired.”

“I’m really sorry for your loss. I wont hold you and baby Mila up anymore. I just…well we take pictures every year and when momma said you checked in I just had to find this picture. I thought you would like it.” The man handed over the picture, “I’ll see you around Mr. Dorough.”

Howie took a look and smiled. Both their eyes were closed and their lips were touching. Someone had caught them in mid-kiss. The knot grew so big in his throat, that it was almost impossible for him to swallow it down, but he did. Millie was gone…but she’d always live in his heart.

“Come on Mila, lets help uncle AJ pick a good watermelon.”

THE END