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A.J. stood in the studio and put on his headphones. He waited for the cue from his producer and the music began. A.J. closed his eyes and sang his heart out to the song “Sincerely Yours.” Every word seemed to pump through his body as he poured his soul into the mic. Before he knew it, he had tears running down his cheeks as he sang. When the song ended, he found himself full of anger and confusion. He stepped out of the recording booth and breathed in deep breaths.

“I’m done for the night,” he said softly.

“Okay, we’ll listen to the track tomorrow afternoon and everything will be good to go if you approve,” his producer said.

“Fine,” A.J. said as he grabbed his jacket. “Good night,” he said then walked out the door.

As soon as he stepped outside, he lit a cigarette and went to his car. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and clicked the button on his keychain to unlock his car. The alarm chirped and the locks came open. He got into his car and without struggle he burst into tears. A.J. sobbed helplessly with his head resting on the steering wheel, occasionally banging his fists up against the dashboard. He took in a few deep breaths and pulled himself together. His body felt a familiar sensation…alcohol cravings. A.J. quickly pulled out his cell phone. He knew what he had to do…call Brian.

The phone rang twice as he cradled it between his ear and shoulder. He heard Brian pick up as he lit another cigarette. The tears were still falling down his cheeks.

“Brian?” he said tearfully.

“Alex, is that you?”

“Yes,” he said while sobbing.

“What’s going on?” Brian asked in concern.

“I--I need you to meet me somewhere. I--I need to talk.”

“Where are you?” he asked quietly.

“I’m in my car at the studio. Just meet me at the coffee shop down the road from there. Please, I’m gonna do something real stupid if you don’t.”

“No, get that thought out of your head,” he said quickly. “Okay, I’m on my way. Do me a favor and call you’re A.A. Sponsor and talk to her until I get there. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes,” A.J. said as he wiped the tears off his face.

“Good, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes, tops.”

“Okay,” A.J. said then hung up.

As soon as he started his car, he called his A.A. sponsor. She picked up the phone immediately.

“Alex, I was hoping you’d call. Where you were last week?”

“Sorry, I had to be in the studio,” he said. “Can I talk for a few minutes?”

“Sure, what’s going on?”

“I need a drink real bad,” he confessed.

“And why do you need one?”

“Because I fucking hurt inside. I just want it to go away!” he shouted as he tears started again.

“Okay, Alex, you need to breathe. Take deep breaths and clear your mind.”

A.J. drew in deep breaths as he drove down the road to the coffee shop. His mind began to clear as he continued to listen to his sponsor.

“Now, I don’t want you to focus on what’s bothering you. I want you to focus on thinking clearly. What have we talked about thinking clearly?”

“Find a place to call your sanctuary and go there until your mind clears,” he answered.

“And where is your sanctuary?”

“The coffee shop,” he said with a sigh.

“Is that where you’re going?”

“Yes, it is,” he said as he parked the car. “I’m here now.”

“Good, now go inside and do what you have to do to clear your mind. Would you like for me to stay on the phone with you while you do that?”

“No, Brian is on his way. I think I’ll be fine.”

“You have my number, please call if you need to.”

“I will,” he answered. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Alex. Have a good night,” she said then hung up.

A.J. took a moment to regain his composure. He shut his eyes and centered himself before stepping out the car. A.J. was completely zoned out when he heard a knock on his window. He quickly opened his eyes and saw Brian standing by his car. A.J. got out and Brian immediately hugged him.

“Sorry, I took a little longer than I meant to,” he said.

“It’s okay,” A.J. replied wearily.

“What’s going on?” Brian asked.

“Can we go inside? I need a coffee.”

“Alright,” Brian said as he put his hand on his back and led him to the entrance.

Brian found them a secluded table as A.J. ordered his coffee. He paid for his order and went to sit with Brian. He smiled at A.J. and crossed his hands, waiting for A.J. to talk.

“Dude, I don’t know what happened. I was at the studio, recording my album and I just lost it. I was just really angry and I couldn’t explain why.”

“Were you singing “Sincerely Yours?” The one song you’ve been avoiding ever since you started recording,” Brian asked.

A.J. slowly nodded and looked down at the table. “I guess it got to me a little bit.”

“Alex, it’s okay to feel angry. We all go through it at one point or another in our lives.”

“I know, but I just want to be strong enough to fight it,” he said.

“You are strong enough to fight it. You call me, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“So, then you’re strong enough.”

The waitress brought over his coffee and he took a sip of it. He softly chuckled to himself then looked at Brian.

“Six years later and I’m still struggling. When will this shit ever end?”

Brian leaned back and crossed his arms. “Do you remember when I told you that God never gives us more than what we can handle?”

“Yes.”

“Then you know you can handle this.”

A.J. nodded sarcastically. “I know, I know. This too shall pass,” he mumbled.

“I think this album is exactly what you need. Get all that emotion out of you before you join us on tour. I think you’ll feel much better about yourself if you did.”

“Well, the last track was recorded tonight,” he said as he stirred his coffee.

Brian leaned forward and rested his arms on the table. “Have you eaten today?”

“No.”

Brian raised his eyebrows at him and stood up. “Don’t go anywhere.”

“What are you doing?”

Brian ignored him and went up to the counter. A.J. rolled his eyes and went back to sipping on his coffee. Brian came back to the table with a turkey sandwich in his hands. He set it down in front of A.J. and sat back down in his chair.

“Eat,” he urged.

“I’m not really hungry,” A.J. argued.

“Eat or I’m leaving.”

“You know what, Littrell, you’re a pain in my ass,” he said as he picked up the sandwich.

Brian smiled. “And you love me for it.”

“Yeah, yeah,” A.J. replied.

After A.J. had finished his sandwich, Brian nodded in approval.

“Well, I should get back home to my wife and son. Do you feel better?”

“Yeah, thanks, Rok.”

“No, problem,” Brian said as he stood up. “Are you going home?”

“I will in a little while. I’m going to sit here and finish my coffee before I go.”

“Okay,” he said as he hugged A.J. “Don’t forget about the rehearsals tomorrow night.”

“Seven sharp,” A.J. said then hugged him back.

Brian left the coffee shop and A.J. went back to sipping on his espresso. He was enjoying the savoring taste when he heard a loud crash behind him.

“Damn it!” shouted a female’s voice.

A.J. turned around and was surprised to see Courtney at the table behind him, picking up a broken plate. He got up and stepped over to her.

“You need any help?” he asked.

“No, I got it,” she said as she stepped back and stepped on his foot. She jumped and turned around. “I am so sorry,” she stuttered. “It--it just isn’t my day,” she said then looked at him.

A.J. smiled as he looked into those beautiful blue eyes. She tilted her head to the side and looked at him. A smile crept across her face as she pushed the chair out of the way.

“So, we meet again,” she said as she grabbed her broom.

“Yes…we do,” he replied. “I didn’t realize you worked here.”

“Yeah, surprising, right? An upscale coffee shop hiring on a clumsy waitress such as myself. What were they thinking?” she said as she started sweeping.

A.J. admired the tattoo on her arm. It looked like some sort of Egyptian symbol with brightly colored flowers surrounding it. He could tell parts of it were recently new from the brightness of color.

“Nice artwork,” he complimented.

“Thanks,” she said with a smile. “I like yours too.”

“Thanks” he replied.

“You’re welcome,” she said softly.

The stared at each other for a moment and then she cleared her throat and looked her watch.

“We close in three minutes and I still have a ton of work to do.”

“Yeah, I should head home,” A.J. said. “Maybe we’ll see each other again sometime.”

“Maybe,” she said with a smile.

“Have a good night,” he said.

“You too,” she replied and went back to her sweeping.

A.J. smiled and left the coffee shop. He got in his car and couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. There was something about this woman that kept him interested. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he wanted to know more about her. A.J. chuckled to himself and turned on the car. It was late and he needed his sleep. As he drove down the road to his home, he made a mental note to himself…find out more about this mysterious Courtney.