“Hold up, hold up, hold up. Wait just a cotton pickin’ minute.” Nick pulled on Ben and Solana’s arms, halting their quick pace down Broadway.

“What?”

“You, Mr. Casey…”

“What!?”

“You haven’t asked for a smoking break since you got here…what’s up with that?”

Ben shrugged and stated as simply as he would have at reporting the weather, “I quit.”

“What!? When!?”

“About a month ago, genius. You just now noticed?” Ben started walking again, keeping his focus on all of the huge billboards and buildings he’d always see on TV and the movies. Now he was really here. He couldn’t believe it.

“Well, yeah…I never let you smoke around me.”

“Nope. Erin said she didn’t like kissing an ashtray, so…I quit.”

Nick cracked up. Solana cracked up. Ben stopped walking again wondering what was so damned funny. “WHAT!?”

“Get used to it, bud…that’s the first of a million things you’ll give up for a woman.”

“Oh great…you sayin’ I’m pussy whipped?”

“I’m not sayin’ nuttin’.” Nick kept walking a few steps ahead, making sure Tony was nearby. Every few steps though, he’d turn around to Ben and Solana and ‘meow’ like a cat.

“Stop it! I’m glad I quit!” Ben couldn’t hide the giggle from his attempt at anger. He knew it, Nick was right. Not that he regretted it at all. Erin was good for him. Smoking wasn’t.

“Okay, where we headed now?” Solana wrapped an arm around Ben and encouraged him to go with her to sneak up to Nick. When they got just close enough, they took advantage of his oblivious state. She gently stuck a foot in his step and tripped him, causing him to plow into a very stern looking businessman.

“Oh shi-…god. I’m sorry.” He whipped around to his innocent looking companions. “You know…I think…” He stopped and pushed them ahead of him. “…that you guys need to lead. You’re dangerous. Don’t make me separate you.”

“Party pooper.” Solana stuck out her tongue and kept walking. She loved this. She wasn’t the mom, she wasn’t the grown up, but she wasn’t the kid either. She was just…Lani. It had been too damned long. Playful. She missed being playful.

“Stick that thing out again and I’ll grab it.”

“Okay, you two…where the hell are we going? It’s hot out here.” Ben was being the grown up. Go figure.

“You wanna grab a cab and head to the World Trade Center Site?”

At just the thought, they stopped walking. Without brakes lights. So, of course, Nick plowed into them. “You know, we could just slip into one of these theaters and get paid for this routine.”

“Oooh, Broadway! Let’s go!” Solana stepped into the street and hailed a cab with one hip swivel. A cab van no less so everyone would have room.

“How the hell did you do that?” Nick pushed Tony into the van first and Ben next to him, sliding into the back seat with Solana.

“Gotta have Latino hips, baby.” She scooted her hip over and bopped his. “Ben? Do you have my camera?”

“Yup…in my bag here.”

“Where to, people?”

“Oh…World Trade Center, please.”

As the cab traveled closer to the site, the foursome grew more silent, realization hitting as to what they were about to see.

“I’ll drop you off at the ticket booth here…you’ll have to walk the rest of the way.”

“That’s good, thanks.” Nick passed a twenty up front and bopped Ben on the head when he pretended to pocket it instead of giving it to the driver. “Pass it up, dweeb.”

“Yeah, yeah…thanks, man.”

Everyone piled out of the van, they got their tickets for the viewing platform and they silently walked closer and closer to the site. As they approached, they stopped cold, seeing a building peeking out of the area with a flag hanging from it. Underneath was a banner. Ben read it aloud.

We Will Never
Forget Them

We Will Never
Forget You

Love
The WTC Families

“Have you been here before?” Solana took hold of Nick and Ben’s hands as they approached the walkway to the viewing platform, smiling at Tony who didn’t seem to mind being the outsider.

“Yeah…but it didn’t look like this at all…still cleaning up and stuff.”

“Where were you when you found out?” Ben never talked about Sept. 11th too much, like most kids his age. He freaked out the day it happened, got bored out of his gourd talking about it in school and then sort of left it alone. Now, there was no ignoring it. The tragedy was too obvious. He was regretting his half assed attitude about it all.

“Sleeping in Toronto. We had just been in Boston and some of us went on that night…so I was already across the border.”

“Boston!? Jesus. Didn’t one of the planes come from there?” Solana dropped Nick’s hand and grabbed onto the railing, leaning in to see as much as she possibly could.

“Two…yeah. Brian’s wife was supposed to be on one of ‘em…and one of our crew members was.”

“Oh God…I had no idea.”

“Yup. He was going home to be with his wife who was having a baby…she had it…oh, two or three days later.”

“I can’t imagine.”

“Wasn’t a lot of fun for us; I can’t imagine what she went through.”

“No kidding. I was at work and Barry’s wife called. We just closed up shop, picked up our kids from school and day care and went home. I didn’t come out of the house for like three days.”

“I wish I could have done that. I wanted to be with my family so bad…it was nuts. But, we had shows and were in Canada…so we kept going.”

“Do you regret that now?”

“Yes and no. I mean, on one hand, it was just a bitch to do you know? None of us dealt with it well at all. We wanted to hold our families too, but yet, it’s like we all needed to perform. The fans, the crew…everyone needed some life.”

“Yeah…how’d they deal with it in school, Ben?”

“We have closed circuit TV, so we watched news all day. Some moms picked up their kids, some kids ditched school…I just couldn’t stop watching TV. It was like a damned magnet.”

“Yep…we did that all day at the hotel too. Just stared at those images over and over and over again. My brother was here…saw it happen.”

“No way…oh my god! How old is he again?”

“He was thirteen then. He and mom rented a car and flew outta here like nobody’s business. Drove all the way to Florida.”

“Smart mama. I’d have run like the wind.”

No more words were shared as they walked around the platform individually, Solana taking pictures, Ben closing his eyes to shut it out, all of them soaking in the atmosphere, the depth of what happened here, and what it meant for them now.

As if choreographed, they met on the walkway and headed back to the street, stopping now and again to look at flowers, reading poetry and letters written on all sorts of papers, some fresh, some bleeding and running from previous rains.

Surreal. Scary. Holy. Hellish. Cursed and yet somehow…blessed.

They made their way back to the hotel, still quiet, still deep in thought, and stopped by a street vendor to get a famous New York hotdog before heading upstairs.

It had been a good day. As Nick let the others in the room, he had to smile to himself. Yes, he was gaining a new family. One with no expectations other than he be himself…he share himself…he love himself. Because they returned the same. Themselves. It was so easy.

“Are you being good for Katy?”

“Sí, Mami. I being good. Are you?”

Solana giggled and held the phone between her ear and shoulder, pouring drinks for her traveling companions. She was having a ball, but desperately missed her daughter. This was the longest she’d ever been away from her and it hadn’t hit her until they returned from their traipsing around that afternoon how much she just wanted to hold her. But, it would have to wait for another day or two. “I being good, too.”

“Can I talk to Nicky?”

“Yeah…he’s right here. I’ll talk to you tomorrow and be home Monday, okay?”

“Sí, Mami. Adios.”

“Adios, mi bebé. Te amo.” She tapped Nick on the shoulder to hand him the phone. “Your girlfriend wants to speak to you.”

“Oh, okay…” He got up from the floor after blowing up his character on the video game and took the phone and drink from Solana. “Thanks…Hola, Rosalie.”

“Hola, Nicky. Hablas Español hoy.”

“Ah, no Rosalie. I’m tired. You speak Spanish. I’ll do English, okay?”

She sighed and he could hear her shift the phone from ear to ear. He plopped on the couch, signaling Tony to go take his place at losing to Ben in his game and smiled, imagining her sitting on Solana’s overstuffed chair, legs crossed, pink underpants showing and curls pressed against the floral fabric. He suddenly felt homesick himself.

“Okay, Nicky. Lo pierdo.”

“Aw, I miss you too. We’ll be home soon.” Tony looked back at Nick amazed he was having a conversation with this little girl…in Spanish no less.

Nick shot him a “what?” look and flipped him off. He loved surprising people…this was kind of fun.

“Cuántos días?”

“Dos. Two days.”

“Okay. Quiero un abrazo.”

“You do, huh? Well, I’ll give you a big hug when we get back, okay?”

“Sí.” Rosalie yawned and groaned. “Durmiente ahora.”

“Okay, go to bed and we’ll be home soon.”

“Te amo, Nicky. Oh... Bese a Mami para mí, okay?”

“Yeah, I will. Te amo, Rosalie.”

Nick clicked off the phone and tossed it on the coffee table, feeling 6 eyes on him. Looking at his companions he flopped back on the couch. “What!?”

Ben and Tony went back to their game, shaking their heads. Solana, however, walked over to him and stood in front of him. “You gonna tell me why everyone’s looking at me?”

“No.” She bent down and cupped his face in her hands, tilting his head forward so she could kiss his forehead. “You’re just neat, Mr. Carter.” She turned and disappeared in the bathroom, leaving him breathless and speechless.

Then, he felt four eyes on him. “What, god dammit!?”

And in unison…without another thought or moment between them, Ben and Tony told him.

“Meow.”

“Oh yeah, baby…and proud of it.”