“Do not chase me, Nick…just go away.”

Nick slowed at Ben’s fair plea, frustrated and frankly pissed. He knew, from the deepest part of his heart that Ben and Aaron would get along so well.

If only…

…if only Ben would allow it. His jealousy, something Nick had to deal with from the beginnings of his relationship with the teen, was just not within his comprehension. He had finally opened up enough that Nick was able to get close to Ben’s entire family. Ben dealt well with the fact that he and Lani were dating. He seemed okay when Nick was gone for so long touring and making the film. But yet…whenever Aaron was mentioned…

“Fine, but stop running away from me. I thought we were past that.”

Ben stopped and turned back to Nick, daggers shooting out of his eyes. “I thought we were past a lot of things, but I’m not so sure I was right.”

“Hold up. What the hell are you talking about?”

“Just forget it. Don’t I have enough shit to deal with right now?”

“I dunno, Ben. You’ve cut me off right along with your mom.”

“Aw, you upset because I haven’t called you whining and crying like everyone else? You wanna be my savior too?” Ben couldn’t believe it. He sounded just like José had when they were playing basketball. It was official. He still was and always would be…bad.

“What the HELL is your problem???”

“Nothing. Just…” Ben started to run again, stopped turned back to Nick to say something and decided against it. At least not before getting a few more feet away from him first. “Just fuck off, okay?”

“BEN!” Nick wanted to chase, but his feet seemed to have more sense than his heart and he couldn’t budge. “God dammit, what the hell is going on around here, lately?” His feet finally moved, but back in the direction of the center instead. If Rosalie bit his head off, he was heading home to Mom. And that was saying more than he even wanted to think about right now.

“Did you catch him?” Solana met Nick in the parking lot, pulling her hair up into a bun as she walked.

“Aw…keep it down.”

“Nope. I’m hot and I’m cooking dinner. It stays up.” Looking around for any sign of Ben, her shoulders slumped as the last tendril of hair was properly pinned up. “You’re alone.”

“Yep. I let him go. What the hell have I done?”

“Uh…nothing? He’s been quiet this week, but otherwise okay. What did you do to him?”

“NOTHING! God…” Nick threw his hands into the air and dug into his pocket for his keys. “I’m gonna get Ro…meet you at home, okay?” He leaned down for a kiss and quickly slid one of her hair pins out of the bun.

“Nick…you are impossible.” She grabbed the loose lock of hair and stuck it in her mouth like a flamenco dancer would bite a rose. With a hand flourish and swish of her hips, she turned and went back inside. “At home, Mr. Carter…we’ll continue this at home.”

Home.

Why did such a small word bring about such massive confusion and emotion?

Nick peeked into the room where Rosalie had spent the last few hours of her day playing, creating and singing. Ah, to be four years old again. “You ready, Muñe?”

“Nicky! You came again today!” She jumped up from her puzzle and ran to him, wrapping her arms around his neck as he squatted down to scoop her up. “It’s not a Friday.”

“I know. I got out of my meeting early, so I thought I’d help Mamí out.” He held on tight to her, grateful for the way her curls tickled his neck, her eyes lit up the dark spots in his heart, and for the feeling of pure contentment that washed over him whenever she or her mother was in his presence. Maybe they were the super heroes in all of this.

“Are we going to your house or mine?”

“Yours. Mamí’s cooking. And then, I have something really cool to tell you.”

“Ooh…tell me now.” She wriggled out of his arms and grabbed her backpack, calling out a perky ‘adios’ to Mrs. Burns.

“Nope. You’ll have to wait. It’s a surprise.” She looked up to him sideways, the ticking of calculated thinking almost audible. “And don’t you even start figuring out a way to get me to talk.”

“You no fun.”

“You’re just ornery.”

“Mr. Carter?”

It sounded so much nicer with a Spanish accent and a lilt of flirtation in it. “Yeah?” He turned back to the older teacher and quickly figured out why Rosalie wasn’t fond of her. She was about as warm as a witches tit.

“I need you to sign something.” She came towards them with a paper and pen and not a smile anywhere to be found.

“Me? What for?”

“If you’re going to be collecting Rosalinda up regularly, you need to be added to the list of approved adults. We just need you to sign the rule form and get a contact number for you.”

“Señora Burns. I like Rosalie, por favor.”

“And I like English, please.” Turning her attention from the glaring child, she smiled coldly at Nick. “This will only take a second.”

“Yeah, sure…are there problems with the wrong people picking up kids?” He took the paper and squatted down, having Rosalie turn her back to him so he could use her as a desk. As he quickly signed, he whispered in her ear, mocking the old biddy. “Rosaliiiiiiiiiiiinda.”

Rosalie giggled and Nick stood to hand the paper back to Mrs. Burns, waiting for an answer to his question before letting go of it.

“Sometimes. And we’ve had some, um…” she leaned in close so Rosalie couldn’t hear. Silly woman; Rosalie could hear whatever she chose to hear. “…unappealing types hanging around the playground. You can never be too careful.”

“Unappealing types?”

Rosalie tugged on the hem of Nick’s shirt and pulled. “Let’s GO!” Her eyes told a tale of not an impatient child, but one who did not want to be discussing whatever it was the grown-ups were discussing. Nick had seen that look in her eye before and didn’t like it.

“Ro, let me talk to Mrs. Burns for a minute. Do you want to finish what you were coloring while you wait?”

“No. I want to go home.”

“I can’t speak of this now anyway, Mr. Carter. A paper has gone to the children’s homes, so perhaps you can ask her mother.”

“See? C’mon, Nicky. I wanna hear the surprise!”

Nick reluctantly took a step further out of the classroom, but turned remembering one more thing.

“Oh and Mrs. Burns? In English or Spanish…it’s ‘Rosalie’.”

“Yes, Mr. Carter. Not every child here is bilingual and it’s unfair to tho-…”

Nick lifted his hand in a polite wave and cut her off. He didn’t want to hear some pedagogical mumbo jumbo as to why the woman was disrespectful of the child’s first language. Or her near perfect bi-lingual abilities. He didn’t want to hear another word out of her mouth at all.

“Vamos Rosalie. Mamí nos está esperando.” He shot one final glare to Mrs. Burns and grabbed his sweetie’s hand, escorting her out and tossing one more gratuitous “adios” her way.

“No me gusta Señora Burns, Nicky.”

“A mi tampoco, Muñe.”

Rosalie snickered and skipped alongside her buddy. Her Nicky. And he was right. Mamí was waiting and Mrs. Burns was unlikable. But she had Nick and while the ‘unappealing types’ that Mrs. Burns whispered about were always in the back of her mind, she tried to trust in a waiting mom and a loving Nick. She tried as hard as she could.

Rosalie was uncharacteristically quiet going home, but as soon as the car fell into park, she was out of the car and running up the stairs to see her mama. “Mamí! We’re home! What’s for dinner!?”

“Chicken. Go put on play clothes.”

She dumped her bag in the middle of the floor and started into the living room, stopping when she heard Nick loudly clearing his throat. “What?”

“Bag. Room.”

Her eyes narrowed and she angrily stomped back and picked it up, a cloud following her back toward the hall. “Hi, Ben. You gonna tell me to do something too?”

“Ben?” Nick kissed Solana and ducked under the cabinets to look into the living room. “He came home with you?”

“Tread lightly. Brittle little bug.”

“I’m thinkin’ everyone’s brittle lately.” Nick dipped a finger into whatever it was Lani was stirring on the stove and licked his finger. “Damn, you’re good.”

“I know it.” She closed the lid, swatting another invasive finger of his away. “Something happen at school?”

“Mrs. Burns. She’s a bit of a witch, isn’t she?” He turned and grabbed two bottled waters out of the fridge, running one along the nape of Lani’s neck causing her to hiss and turn, pelting him with the hand towel draped over her shoulder.

“And you’re a brat. What happened with the old bag?” She tried to take the other bottle of water from him, but he yanked it away. “Get your own. This is for the ‘bug’.”

“Fine. Mrs. Burns. I detest that woman.”

“She wouldn’t let Ro speak in Spanish; I thought that was a bilingual school.”

“The preschool is, but the after care…her class anyway is all English because she refuses to learn Spanish. She’s not real fond of us immigrants.”

“Immigrants? Jesus…they hired that?”

“Fun, huh? Welcome to my world.” Lani checked the chicken in the oven and stood, wrapping her arms around Nick’s waist and swiping the unopened bottle from the counter behind him. “You didn’t say anything stupid did you?”

“Me!? Stupid? Never.”

“Oh God…what’d you say?”

He chuckled and kissed the top of her head, wondering if the woman had even caught his sarcasm as he left. “I didn’t say anything mean, but I made sure Ro and I talked in Spanish as we left.”

“Smart ass.”

“Yup. So, um…she said they have been having people hanging around the school. Sent home a paper.”

Lani pulled away from him, opened her newly acquired bottle of water and busied herself doing kitchen-y things. Or so it looked. Nick had a hunch she wasn’t doing much of anything except avoiding the conversation and being a thief. “So, why don’t you go on in and talk to Spongebob Grumpy Pants in there.”

“I was talking to you.”

“Yup. And now you can go talk to Ben.” She offered up a cheesy grin and pushed him aside so she could retrieve another bottled water for the boy. “He needs you.”

He needs him. Aaron needs him. Lani needs him. Ro needs him. Good God…and who did Nick need?

Every last one of them.

Nick said nothing as he entered the living room, only offering Ben the bottled water. He looked outside in the direction Ben had been silently staring and wondered what could be going on in the young boy’s mind. “Enjoy your run?”

“If you’re gonna be a smart ass, just don’t bother, huh?” Ben yanked the bottle out of Nick’s hand and quickly opened it, chugging down a good quarter of the water before slamming it onto the coffee table. “Thanks.”

Nick nodded and sank into the overstuffed chair, kicking his feet up onto the coffee table with a loud, tennis-shoed thud.

“Shoes off the table, dude.”

“You my mama now, too? Gonna accuse me of giving you grief when you haven’t even talked to me in a week? Jesus, you sound just like her.”

“Don’t give me that shit. You and your family don’t have any problems.”

“You think you got all the answers, don’t you?”

“Am I wrong?”

“More than you know. Ever wonder why I never go home anymore, huh?”

“I just figured it was cuz of Miss Romero and Ro.”

“You figured wrong. And that’s why I invited Aaron to come to Thanksgiving. It has nothing to do with you.”

“When will it, Nick? When will anything have to do with me???”

“Is that it, Ben? You ran because you don’t think I give you enough time? Or is it enough space? Or maybe, I just don’t read your mind and know what the hell it is you want from me?”

“Maybe…” Ben stopped and finished off his bottle of water, quickly wondering if he wanted to continue this conversation or just storm out of the house and walk home. Home. Yeah. Right. No. “…maybe you can’t deal with the fact that I don’t want ,i>anything from you anymore. I’m doin’ just fine on my own.”

“I’d buy that if I could, Ben.”

“Maybe you’re not my hero anymore. Maybe I realized there’s no such thing. Maybe I learned that no one can be anyone’s hero. All you ever have is yourself.”

“You feelin’ good about that little realization, huh? You seem so happy.” The sarcasm that dripped from Nick’s words brought Lani out of the kitchen and into the room. These two loved each other too much for her to let it get ugly. They’d all come too far for that.

Ben looked up and saw Lani enter and rolled his eyes, angrily getting up and heading toward the back patio. “Yeah, here we go. Bring in the reinforcements to tell me I’m hurting myself and no one else.”

He waited for an argument from the adults and when he didn’t get one, he got even more frustrated and angry. While he surely wasn’t listening to reason, a bit of it might seep in if they’d just give it a try. But they didn’t. Proof positive that they really didn’t give a damn about his feelings. “Fine. You know what? I don’t know why I came over here. I’m leaving. I don’t need this shit.”

With great flourish, he slid the patio door open and slammed it shut, taking off around Lani’s backyard. They heard the gate lock and door slam and listened as his running steps echoed on the sidewalk as he disappeared down the street. When they heard nothing else, Nick took a deep breath, wanting to say something intelligent, but nothing intelligent seemed to be available.

“I suppose I shouldn’t go after him.”

“Nope. You need to mash the potatoes.”

“Can I pretend they’re his head?”

“Yes…but you’d better get this fixed before Aaron shows up, Nick.”

“Pfft. Great. I didn’t know I’d broken anything.”