Chapter 28: Everythings Falling Apart Because You’re So Hypocritical
AJ - -
My head is pounding worse than any migraine I have ever felt. My stomach has these empty pains worse than any hunger. When I open my eyes the light burns. I feel like dying, but I know I can’t. There’s a girl out there, I was trying to get her attention with this stunt, and I can’t die for her sake alone. No matter how much she tries to deny it, she needs - -
“AJ?” I heard softly as her body entered the room.
“Yea...”I said quietly letting her know I was awake.
“I can’t just sit out there knowing your in here going through this alone.”There was my girl I remembered. She had been gone for so long, but there is the caring girl I remembered.
“You left me before, what’s the difference?”I asked smartly. I wanted her to know how incredibly pissed I was about the Nick thing.
“AJ!”she said loudly. “You left me! You left for the shows in London and the AJ I knew never came back. You were never the same person!”
“I still loved you.”I said quietly.
“You may have loved me but you let it, THIS! Take you over.”she said sitting down on the edge of my bed. “You pushed me to him AJ, whether you want to admit it, you did. This turned you into such a jerk for months and Nick was just there. I did what any girl would do. I went for who treated me better.”
“He shouldn’t have done it.”I said. That was all I could think of to say because she was just so damn right.
“He loves me, more than you can right now, and until you get better its going to stay that way.”she said as she put her hand on mine.
“And when I get better?”I asked. I only needed an inkling of hope.
“I guess we will cross that bridge when we get there, until then, just let him back in babe, he feels bad enough. He is only human. He’s been your best friend for over fifteen years, don’t let someone stupid like me ruin that.”she said giving me a slight smile.
“You’re not stupid.”I said touching my hand to the side of her face. “You’re beautiful.”
“Stop it.”she said blushing. It was still there between us. The fire was still burning a little. “You’re delirious.”she said and I tried to laugh. It hurt my ribs.
“I love you.”I said and she stopped laughing to look over at me.
“I love you too.”she said a few seconds after and leaned down to kiss me on the cheek. “Now get some sleep.”
“Will you stay with me? At least until I fall asleep?”I asked her, if I fell asleep and didn’t wake back up I wanted to remember her last.
“Of course.”she said and I pulled her hand so she would lay beside me. She layed on her side facing me and rubbed her hand through my hair slowly until I dazed off. Times were changing, whether we liked it or not.
CAROLINE --
“Shhh.”I said seeing Nick pop his head through the curtain just minutes after AJ had fallen asleep.
“Is he okay?”Nick whispered as I got up from the bed.
“He was scared, but at least he’s asleep.”I said closing the curtain behind me as I followed him out into the hallway.
“Look I’m sorry.”he said grabbing my hand as we stood outside of AJ’s room.
“It’s fine. We’re all just tired and stressed out.”I said grabbing his other hand in mine.
“No I mean I’m sorry. I’m sorry for putting you in the position to choose between us...”Where was this going with him? “I’m sorry that I fell for you, I didn’t mean to.”he strated but I put my hand over his mouth.
“You didn’t do anything wrong.”I said smiling at him. I had myself in such a tangled mess, how was I ever going to find my way out.
“What’s going on?”I asked looking over at Nick as two doctors and a nurse ran by us into AJ’s room.
“We should go see.”Nick said running toward the door which immediately got slammed in our faces.
“Somethings wrong Nick.”I said through the slit in the door i could see them wrestling with him trying to get him to stop convulsing. I think he was having a seizure, but...I’m not a doctor.
“Go get them!”Nick said pointing towards the waiting area. He was frantic. I sprinted back the two hallways towards the quiet waiting room practically yelling for them to follow me.
“GUYS! GUYS! We need for all of you to head back to the waiting room.”the nurse said walking out of the room.
“We want to know what’s happened.”Brian said as she pushed us back.
“He’s having a reaction to coming down from the drugs, kind of like a seizure we’re going to move him to ICU.”I was speechless. He was fine a minute before, now he may die.
The waiting was terrible. It was literally two hours of watching Seinfield reruns in silence, me crying, and worrying my ass off. I was terrifed that this could be my last time seeing him alive. As I walked towards the ICU room he was in alone I wasn’t prepared for what I would see. He was lifeless, the respirator was breathing for him.
“You his wife?”the nurse asked as I walked in.
“No.”I said quietly as I walked over to the bed. I never wanted those tattooed hands to touch mine so bad in my life.
“Hmmm, well he keeps mumbling about some girl.”she said giving me a side smile as I wiped the tears form under my eyes.
“Can he hear us?”I asked cautiously running my hand up his arm.
“Yea I like ot think so, that white bottle up there is keeping him asleep.”she said pointing above his head. I smiled at her the best I could as she stepped to the side of the room to clean some of the medical supplies.
“Hey baby. I’m here.”I said leaning down to kiss him on the cheek. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay here as long as it takes.”
“What’s it like?”the nurse asking scare me as she reappeared. “You know dating a celebrity.”....creepy.
“Oh no I’m not...”I started but shrugged. “I guess they aren’t that to me anymore. I don’t think of them that way. I just love him.”I said squeezing his hand in mine. I did love him.
“Must be nice though.”she said smiling.
“I guess. You pay your price though.”I said looking back at him. “You lose your privacy.”
“Well there is a chair here, it’s not to comfortable but it should work if you wanna stay.”she said stopping at the door.
“I don’t want him to be by himself.”I said walking over to sit down.
“I’ll shut the door behind me.”she said quietly closing the door behind her. I suddenly was pulling the chair to be closer to his bed putting my hand on his.
“It’s really weird being in here with you.”I said rubbing my over his arm, tracing the lines of all of his tattoos. “I’m in here with you instead of being out there with Nick. I guess that’s kind of how it’s always been huh?”I said pondering what I had just said. “NIck was there at the right time and you were just such an asshole, but I mean...”I stopped knowing he couldn’t hear me, this may make it easier. “He’s just to fill your spot, AJ. He’s a great guy, but it’s not the same as it was with you. I miss you, and now I may never have a chance to tell you all of this...I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
NICK - -
As I walked into the room I saw her. She had fallen asleep with her hand in his. I knew she still loved him...was I going to be able to deal with?
Author's Chapter Notes:
Things take a turn for the worst....
