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I was well into my second martini when I started to relax. I could feel the effects of the vodka through my body already. It always did the trick. The night was progressing well and to my surprise it was going better than I expected. It was silly of me to be worried about how Nick would get along with Marc after the comment he made. When I glanced at Nick from across the room, I could tell they were laughing at something he had said. Probably one of his jokes based on his hand gestures. He always over exaggerated while telling a joke or a story. Amidst the excitement he caught my stare for a brief moment and smiled before rejoining the conversation.

“You’ll sprain your neck if you keep checking back on him.” I turned around at the voice, and saw Susan looking at me. I immediately felt ashamed.

“Force of habit I guess.” I said non-convincingly.

“Oh honey, I think it’s more than that. You really don’t have to be worried about them getting along.” I was stunned. How did she know I was worried about that?

“I can see it on your face dear. You’ve been uncomfortable all night.” I finished the last of my martini and sighed.

“I just hope he’s not making an ass of himself.” I blurted out.

“Oh honey, when has he ever done that?” She joked and rejoined the conversation like she never left it. I looked at my empty glass and excused myself from the girls. I walked quietly past Nick as I exited the room. The restaurant had picked up, as had the bar. I made my way through the small crowd and adjusted my dress while I waited for the bartender. I was watching the flat screen above the bar when I heard a familiar voice next to me order a drink.

“You’re husband sure does like to talk a lot.” He spoke. I turned to look at him and chuckled.

“Its all he knows. He’s pretty good at it huh?” I asked Marc. He stood next to me, and slightly smiled.

“I can imagine its hard not to be center of attention after 22 years with his profession.” His comment shocked me a little,

“Did he tell you about that?” I asked. I figured Marc was not the kind to know who he was.

“Its hard not to know when the others ask him about it.” I laughed,

“Its kind of sad isn’t it? You would think that after all this time they wouldn’t act like his groupies.”

“Its not too bad. I left just as they were talking about their picks for the upcoming football games.”

“Ah, I would have left too,” I chuckled, “After 9 years he still thinks I want to hear about Tampa games.” I said with a smile. Even thinking about Nick’s annoying habits made me happy.

“Wow. 9 years? That’s a long time to be with someone with his career.”

“Yes it is,” I took a drink, “But it’s a long time to be with anyone.” I tried to keep the conversation neutral. Not that I minded talking about our relationship, there’s just some boundaries you don’t cross with clients.

“There you are babe.” Nick wrapped his arm around my back and leaned in to kiss my cheek, “Am I interrupting anything? You better not be telling jokes about me.” He laughed while trying to get the bartenders attention.

“Contrary to your belief, not everything is about you Carter.” I joked.

“She was talking about me wasn’t she?” He directed the question to Marc. I could tell by his silly grin that he was enjoying the evening. I couldn’t help but think about how many he had.

“Yes, but I brought it up. I was surprised to hear how long you two have been married.”

“It almost didn’t happen,” Nick took a drink, “Did she tell you she thought I was joking when I proposed?” I glared at him while he smirked at me.

“No, we didn’t get that far. But I’d like to hear about it.”

He arrived back at the hotel exhausted. He couldn’t wait to lie down and put this chaotic day behind him. Once he stepped into the room he heard the television playing. Renee was sitting on the floor shifting through some of her belongings; he couldn’t help but think that she didn’t look like she was waiting for him. He began to feel disappointed, after all the press he dealt with today he wanted to come back and wind down with her. He shut the door and interrupted her attention.

“Hey, I was beginning to wonder about you,” She looked up from the floor and smiled, “I have had one of the best days!”

“Yeah?” he yawned, with every step he took the more tired his body became. He wanted to do nothing but relax, and was not prepared for excitement. He dropped down on the sofa next to her as she continued talking.

“Yes! This city is so beautiful. I can’t even begin to tell you how amazing the architecture is. The streets and the buildings are nothing like we have back home. I went to this cathedral today and was in awe of its complexity. It was gorgeous!” She shifted through some papers and continued talking before he could speak.

“And then I found this alley, and took a picture of this man and his child while they were playing, and you would not believe that he asked me to join in. Even the crumbling walls and cracked streets were beautiful. I mean look the way the sun shines on this.” She flipped through her camera and found the pictures to show Nick, when she realized he was fading fast.

“Oh Nick. You look exhausted!” He watched her excitement fade, and instantly felt bad that he ruined her happy mood, “Here, lets take these off for you.” She started untying the shoelaces on his sneakers and took them off before messaging his feet.

“How was your day?” She asked.

“Long. And tiring. If I have to answer one more question about music I am going to quit forever.” She chuckled at his answer.

“It couldn’t have been that bad. You love this too much to leave it.”

He shrugged his shoulders, at that moment he didn’t care either way. He was tired of having his picture taken every 40 seconds and answering questions all day. He was starving and yet didn’t have the strength to eat, and most of all he was upset that Renee would be leaving soon and hadn’t had much time to spend with her except for the hotel room.

“Wish I could have spent the day with you. What I wouldn’t give to actually sightsee.”

“Oh no worries Nick. I don’t mind going by myself.” She stopped rubbing his feet and stood up from the floor. He noticed she was wearing one of his t-shirts with a pair of black shorts. He smiled at her as she walked over to her luggage and packed her pamphlets and collectibles in them.

“I do.” He muttered. She turned around and raised an eyebrow at him,

“Are you upset about something?” She asked. He did not want to get into a stupid argument when he was in a grumpy mood.

“I just wish I could have experienced that with you.” He grabbed a pillow as he yawned again.

“I know you would have been there if you could.” She sat down beside him. He looked at her and she stared back. He felt that she didn’t understand what he was saying.

“I know you do, but I hate missing out on sharing your interests too.”

“Well, I know you’re working. I understand that you can’t always be with me. I mean I came here knowing you had a busy schedule with your tour.”

“I know you’re understanding, that’s not what I’m upset about.”

“Well, I guess I don’t get it. Maybe you should shower and relax and let me get some room service for you. I’m sure you haven’t ate much today.” She stood up and grabbed the menu for the restaurant. The tension was building inside of him. He was frustrated that she didn’t seem interested in the conversation. That she didn’t want to listen to him. Reluctantly he stood up and walked into the bedroom to undress. All the while he could hear her voice from the other room. The sweetness in it made him even more frustrated. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to relax until his mind was clear. He put on a robe and stepped into the other room just as she hung up the phone.

“I wanted to be with you today, what don’t you get about that?” Nicks voice startled her. She cautiously turned around to face him,

“I do get that. That’s why I said that I understand you can’t be. I’m not mad Nick.” He looked at her eyes and saw how clueless she was. It upset him even more.

“That’s the problem! I hated not being with you today. And you act like you could have cared less that I wasn’t there. Like you didn’t want me to be.”

“I never said that. Where is this coming from Nick? You know I would have enjoyed having you there with me.”

“Really? Because you looked pretty content when I came back tonight.”

“What does that mean? Am I not supposed to enjoy myself? I’m sorry I had a good day without you.”

“No, babe! Maybe I’m not explaining myself clearly.”

“Clearly.” She rolled her eyes. Her arms were crossed now as she looked at him, “Why don’t you just say it Nick?”

“You leave in 2 days. 2 days! And we haven’t spent anytime together. I spent all day thinking about you, wishing that the day could go by so I could see you. I missed you and you act like you didn’t miss me.”

“Of course I missed you. I came here because I missed you, because I wanted to spend time with you. I’m okay with not seeing you all day because I know your job keeps you away from me. When I say I understand it, that’s because I do, but I never said that I enjoy being without you. Sorry that I couldn’t display that how you wanted me to, but you can’t be mad at me for that. I’m doing the best I can with our relationship.”

“I know you are babe,” He walked across the room and embraced her, “I just don’t want you to leave.”

“Well, I can’t stay forever.” She leaned into his hug.
“See that’s what I’m talking about. The sarcasm. I don’t like it.” He released his hold of her and walked away.

“I’m sorry Nick, I’m not good with sharing my feelings, all right? I fucking missed you, I hate that I leave soon too. That’s why I’m trying to enjoy every minute I have with you. What do you want from me?” She walked out of the room. He followed her.

“Marry me.” He stood in the doorway. She laughed.

“Right, lets get married. That’s going to solve our problems.” She spoke mockingly.

“I’m serious. Why not get married?” Nick repeated. She turned and raised an eyebrow at him.

“I can think of many reasons why not to. It’s crazy Nick.”

“No its not babe. I love you.” She gave him a strange look, and turned away. He remained in the same spot when she turned and looked at him again.

“You are serious about this?” She sat down on the bed. He knew her mind was trying to adjust. He walked over to her as he replied,

“Yes, I am.”

“I can’t believe this. You just got mad at me for not missing you and now you want to get married? I don’t understand you.” He reached for her hand and held it,

“I know this isn’t what we’ve talked about, but I’ve never known anyone like you. You handle our relationship far better than anyone else I’ve dated. I remember the first time we met like it was yesterday. I still get those feelings for you every time I see you, and today just made it more clear to me how much I miss you. How much I love you.” He brushed the hair out of her face. She kept her head down. He was sure she didn’t know what to say.

“Have you told anyone else about this?” She asked. The question threw him off, but he answered anyway.

“Alex.” He spoke softly.

“Great, Jay knows.” She shook her hand free of his and walked away from the bed.

“Yes, AJ knows. He couldn’t be more happy for us.”

“Us? I haven’t even said yes yet, and you too are acting like we’re already engaged.”

“You know Alex, babe. He likes you. He likes us together. He’s one of the only guys who truly loves you. Of course I shared it with him.”

“That’s exactly why we shouldn’t do this. They’re your family, and half of them don’t like me.”

“They like you. They just know my track record with women.”

“Right. That’s it. They don’t like me because of you.” She rolled her eyes and sighed, “Either way this is not happening. I like us the way we are.”

“I know you’re scared. I know you’ve revealed things about your past that have kept us from moving forward, but I’m not any of those guys. I’m not trying to change us, I just don’t want to lose you.”

“I’m not going anywhere soon. Clearly I’ve made it this far, but that doesn’t mean that we are ready for marriage. We’ve haven’t even dated for 2 years. Nor seen much of each other during that time.”

“But we’ve seen enough of each other that we’ve grown this close. I don’t know Renee. I just know I don’t want to live without you.” He grew frustrated and slammed the bathroom door behind him. That conversation didn’t go as well as he hoped it would. He didn’t have anything planned, but he hoped she’d be more open to the idea than she was. He hung his head in exhaustion as he stepped into the shower. The water soothed him very little. He couldn’t get the image of her resistance out of his head. God, he hoped he didn’t just fuck up the best thing that ever happened to him. When he reached for the soap, he thought he heard the door open. Wishful thinking, he thought. He cleaned his arms, then his chest, disappointed that he was showering alone. He didn’t expect her to join him after their fight, but he hated being away from her. Her words replayed in his mind as he washed his hair. He couldn’t stop thinking about how adamant she was against marriage. Although he couldn’t blame her, he had told her he didn’t want to in the beginning of their relationship, and she agreed. He cursed himself for mentioning anything as he stepped out of the shower. He looked around for clothes and remembered he didn’t bring any in with him. He opted for a towel instead of the robe, and opened the door.

He didn’t see her in the room. Shit. He didn’t hear the television from the other room. Shit. He didn’t hear anything. Shit! He began to worry about her. He walked over to his luggage and pulled out a pair of shorts. As he slipped into them he heard a door close. He peered into the other room and saw her sitting his food on the coffee table. He smiled faintly as he watched her. He couldn’t place how she was feeling based on her actions. He couldn’t read her, and he didn’t like it.

She glanced shortly at Nick as she walked towards the bed. She sat down with her back towards him and removed her bra from underneath the shirt. Nick felt strangely aroused even though he knew he shouldn’t have. They didn’t exchange words as she lay down on the bed and began to make herself comfortable. He let himself out of the room and closed the door behind him. He didn’t want to disturb her from the other room with the TV. He took one look at the food and was starving. His stomach growled so loud, he thanked god she ordered room service for him. He channel surfed while eating. He couldn’t understand the language on the local channels, but found it amusing to try to figure it out. He found a late night comedy show and laughed at how bizarre it was. He understood a few words and adlibbed the rest. He couldn’t wait to get back to the states and enjoy American television. He left his plates on the table when he was done. His stomach was full and he was fading fast. He turned off the TV before he left the room. He slowly pulled open the door and entered the room. He watched her as he approached the bed.

He lifted the covers quietly; he didn’t want to disturb her as he lay down. He opted not to give her a kiss, he thought he’d play it safe and give the night a rest. He felt foolish for mentioning anything. He had clearly upset her. He rolled onto his right side, facing the window. Shortly after, he felt her lean up against his back. Her arm rested on his side. He was surprised by her actions. Cautiously, he put his arm over hers, his hand cupping her elbow over his stomach, accepting her affection. He thought maybe she would say something, but there was nothing but silence. He felt her breath on his neck and couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore. He yawned as he closed them, his body slowly relaxed as he drifted into sleep.

“I love you Nick.” The voice was faint. He almost wasn’t sure he heard it.

“I don’t want to lose you either.” He heard it again, and rolled onto his back. He met her face and saw tears running down her cheeks. His heart ached instantly.

“Babe, why are you crying?”

“I feel bad. I don’t want you to think I don’t love you.”

“What? I know you do.” He rubbed her arm; he knew he fucked things up, “I shouldn’t have mentioned anything.”

“No, I’m glad you did.” She wiped her face.

“Okay…” He was confused. He sure didn’t get that impression from her earlier.

“I’m scared I don’t know how to say yes.” Her voice cracked as she spoke. He could clearly see how shaken up she was. He rolled onto his left side and held her. He rubbed her back as she continued to cry. She laid her head against his chest.

“I think you just did?” Nick questioned. He was confused about the meaning behind her words. She coughed before speaking again.

“I don’t want a large wedding. Just us, a few close friends and family. We can save the large invites for a reception.” Nick loosened his hold on her and leaned back to see her face. He caught her eyes as she lifted her head. He saw the change in her expression; she appeared more lighthearted.

“I don’t want to announce it quickly either. Not until I’m ready for the others to know.”

“Ok. Anything else?” he asked. The weight was lifting off his heart and his conscience. He was surprised to hear the commitments she was making to him.

“Never refer to me as Mrs. Carter.” She laughed.

He chuckled just before kissing her, “I love you babe.”

“I love you too Carter.”