"Do you want to explain this?!" Aj asked very quietly.

I took a deep breath and looked up at him, "No." I said just as
quietly.

"What do you mean 'No'?" I cringed as he yelled at me. He picked
up the pictures and threw them toward me. I watched as the evidence
of last night flittered to the ground around me. I stared up at him as he
turned and looked out the plate glass window over looking the back
yard. This used to be my house too, but lately it felt more like a hotel.
"Tyler, I'm only going to ask you one more time to tell me what you
were doing when those pictures were taken."

"What does it look like I was doing?" I jerked back from his grasp
as he turned on me quickly.

"It looks like you are fucking my best friend!" He roared.

I looked down at one of the pictures beside my foot, and I had to
agree it did look like that. I smiled, we had decided that would be the
best way to pull it off. Had I actually cheated on Aj? Hell no. I wouldn't
even think about it and the truth be told, I wasn't even touching Kevin
there. It just looked like I was.

"What in the fuck are you smiling about?" He roared and I looked
up at him with a solemn face.

"Nothing."

"That's what I figured." He said turning back toward the window
this time pulling his cigarettes out of his front pocket and lighting one.
"Why?" He asked so quietly that I actually wondered if I was hearing
things until he turned to look at me.

Kevin and I had talked for weeks about how Aj seemed to be
pulling away from me. How when it was just me and him, it usually just
felt like me. Nick had overheard one of our conversations and had
suggested that I try to make Aj jealous. I had laughed it off, at first. The
more I thought about it, later on, the better it sounded. I had gone to
Kevin night before last and had begged him to help me. He had
hesitated, more like put up a brick wall, but I had begged. If it got out
that I had begged for anything I would have been ashamed, but for Aj, I
would walk the world for him. So begging seemed a small price to pay.
We had ironed out the details, down to what I would wear and what we
would do. Nick had been called into take the pictures, which had turned
out like I said earlier much better than I had planned. Kevin had
insisted that I not tell him why I was doing what I was doing, to just
play cool and he would flip out and he would realize what he had been
doing. But as I looked across the room and saw the sadness, the pain,
and disbelief in Aj's eyes I couldn't lie to him, well not anymore. I took a
deep breath and prayed that following my heart was the right thing to
do. It had got me this deep into it, and I was hoping it could get me out
of it.

"I needed proof."

He exhaled a puff of smoke and looked at me strangely, "Proof of
what?"

I felt the tears prick the back of my eyes as I thought back to how
our relationship used to be. "I needed to know if you still loved me." I
said and my reserved failed and tears began rolling down my face.

"That makes no fucking sense what so ever." He said kicking one
of the pictures.

"God dammit Aj, do you actually think I would fuck Kevin?! He's
married, I'm with you and I'm happy. It's you that I don't know about." I
said between sobs, "I used to know without a shadow of a doubt that
you loved me. But now, now its like you aren't even here anymore." I
looked up at him as he stared at me. "I went to Kevin, to ask him if I had
done something wrong, what I could do to get you back to the way you
used to be. During one of the conversations Nick came up with this
stupid idea to make you jealous. Have you noticed that everyone but
you and Nick are in those pictures. Nick took the fucking pictures! I just
needed to know if you still love me."

"So you pretend to fuck my friend to see if I love you?"

"Yeah I know it was a stupid idea, but I was desperate, I had to
know for sure, before..." I couldn't finish the sentence. I couldn't tell
him that I had planned on leaving him if this didn't work. I lowered my
head to my lap and sobbed. Not only had I proven that he didn't care, I
had ended it in the worst way possible.

"Yeah whatever." Aj said as he passed me. I felt my heart shatter
as I heard the front door slam.