“Brian, what is wrong with you?” Kevin demanded. “Look, I know you had a crappy week, but get over it! I’m sick of rehearsing late everyday because your head isn’t in it…”

“Come on guys,” Howie stepped in.

Kevin glared at me once more before going to grab his water bottle.

“You were doing good today,” Nick came over, after Kevin was safely out of hearing range. “What happened with August?”

“Why didn’t you say she was coming over?”

He look at me, incredulously. “Are you serious?”

“You should have… shouted it out,” I laughed in spite of my bad mood.

“I didn’t know she’d go back and buy the book,” he started.

“Go back?”

Nick realized his blunder, but I forced him to tell me about her seeing it. “I was trying to stay out of the middle of it. I told her that she should talk to you.”

It was my turn to fill him in. I told him about the fight we’d had.

“Aww, you’re first fight. How sweet, Rok,” AJ swung an arm around my shoulder.

I glared at him.

“God, that look must run in your family… you and Kevin have it down,” AJ said.

“Get out of here, AJ,” Nick laughed and shoved him away. “What’s the big deal about her buying the book anyway? You haven’t read it, have you? It probably doesn’t say anything that bad about you.”

“It’s the principal of the thing. Especially August reading it…”

“So what?” he asked again. “You think she’ll believe any crap about you anyway? The girl gets hearts in her eyes every time she looks at you. It’s kind of sickening, actually.”

I smiled slightly. “I just… I don’t know. I lost it when I saw that stupid book. What You Wanna Know about me,” I rolled my eyes. I’d dated her for years. I’d been in love with her. I’d pictured myself marrying her.

And now she was using my fame for her gain. It made me sick to my stomach.

Something lit up in Nick’s eyes. An understanding came over his face. “She’s not going to do the same thing. You know that, right?”

“What?” I said, trying to sound indifferent.

“You get the same hearts in your eyes as she does, Brian,” he said matter-of-factly.

I didn’t answer at first. “August thinks I’m still in love with her.”

“Oh, I think you’re in love. But not with Samantha.”

“Wh…”

“Alright, guys, let’s go. I’m ready to go home! Get it right this time,” Fatima clapped her hands together.

I told myself, while doing the Larger Than Life choreography, that Nick was crazy. But I knew he was right. About one thing, anyway. I’d gone off the walls, as if buying the book was as bad as writing it in the first place. It wasn’t the same thing, not at all. I was being stupid. When did Nick turn into the smart half of Frick and Frack? I smiled, while singing, “Wishing I could thank you in a different way, alright.”

August was different. I put that book out of my mind. It wouldn’t happen again.

~*~August’s point of view~*~

I’d gone through a few dozen tissues. My eyes were puffy, my throat was dry. I was in yoga pants, a tank top, and fuzzy slippers. Delilah was playing on the radio. Carmen would be home from work soon, wondering what the heck had happened to me.

This was crazy. I shouldn’t be this distraught over him. It was irrational behavior.

I’d never been so emotional until I’d met him. Hang out with a Backstreet Boy long enough, and apparently your life turned into a sappy pop song. I smiled in spite of myself, glancing at the book. I threw it in the trash.

I heard the apartment door open, but just flopped down on my bed. Carmen would know where to find me.

I closed my eyes, A few seconds later, I heard another knock.

Puzzled, I opened my eyes.

Brian was standing at my door.

It figured. I tried to untangle my hair nonchalantly, but who was I kidding?

“Brian.”

“I knocked, but no one answered. And the door was unlocked…” Brian gestured towards the front door.

Not wanting him to see the tissues that hadn’t made it into the trashcan, I led him into the living room. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to talk to you. We didn’t really finish our conversation earlier.”

Wonderful. Because that was a conversation I wanted to continue. I was going to get some kind, parting words. He was trying to let me down easy, after watching me go a tad drama queen earlier.

“I’m sorry.”

That surprised me. “What?”

“Look, that… relationship didn’t end well. It took me awhile to get over it. To get over her. I thought I was, but then I heard about this book being published. I tried to ignore it, but then I got a letter from her this week about it coming out…” he rambled.

“I know how much you must hate all this information being out about you, Brian. I get it. I really do. I shouldn’t have bought the book, but I was just wondering what was going on.”

“I just wasn’t ready to talk, you know? That’s my fault. I shouldn’t care that you bought it. Just don’t believe everything you read. I can only imagine what’s in there.”

“It’s probably not half as bad as you think,” I said, “but if it helps, I did a lot of skimming. I felt guilty reading it.”

He smiled. “Anyway, enough about the stupid novel. Why should I worry about what she’s doing when you’re around?” He took my hands in his.

I smiled.

“And, no. I’m not in love with her. I can promise you that.”

My face reddened. “Oh. That’s good.”

“You know, you seemed a little jealous before,” Brian’s token grin was back.

“What? Of course not. I was just wondering…”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“You think pretty highly of yourself, don’t you, Backstreet Boy?”

“And you sound pretty confident for someone in pink slippers,” he glanced at my outfit.

There was no arguing with that statement. “I know, I look horrible…”

“You look beautiful,” Brian countered. “Forgive me?” He started to lean towards me, but I put my hand on his chest.

“If we kiss, you’re not going to disappear again, are you?”

Brian laughed. “Try and keep me away.”

We kissed. For the first time in days, everything seemed right again.

I heard the door open, and Carmen’s voice saying, “August, you look like a train wreck.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“I can’t believe we’re front row,” I incessantly tapped Carmen on the shoulder.

“I know. This is pretty sweet,” she agreed, glancing around at the mostly empty arena. She’d spent an hour perfecting her make-up and picking out the right outfit. Then, once we’d arrived here, we’d had to stop by the bathroom to use the mirror. After all, what would Nick think if a single-strand of blonde fell out of place?

“Stop it,” she said, knowing why I was laughing.

“Well you’re being obsessive.”

“Please, Miss ‘why doesn’t he call me’ McFadden?” she smirked. “He’s Nick Carter. When you go out with Nick Carter, you have to look perfect.”

It was fun seeing her nervous. Usually, that was my job. But he’d asked her out for coffee after the rehearsal. Their first date. First, we were going to get to watch them run through the entire show. They were videotaping it, to watch later and figure out what kinks they needed to work out.

“This is going to be so much nicer, not having to listen to thousands of people scream,” I said. “We’ll actually be able to hear them sing and talk…” I’d never seen them perform live before.

Music started playing. Brian had told me that there was going to be a big entrance, but everything wasn’t set up for that tonight. They appeared on the stage though, dressed in blue, futuristic garb. It lasted almost two hours. There were a few minor mess-ups, like Nick rotating the wrong way on the circular stage or Howie dropping his hat during All I Have To Give. But overall, the show was spectacular already. It was obvious that all five of them thrived from being on stage. They had worked so hard to pull all of this together.

Nick failed at not glancing at Carmen every chance he got, though it was obvious he was trying to look cool. Like it wasn’t that important she’d come tonight. Brian had smiled at me a dozen times. I even got a signature wave and hello during Quit Playing Games. Natasha was nearby, so AJ could be caught doing the occasional pelvic thrust while dancing and smiling flirtatiously in her direction.

At the end of the show, they disappeared under the stage. We were both screaming all loud as we could. The energy in the room was obvious. If they could pull that off with such a small crowd, then I couldn’t imagine how it would be opening night.

And the many show nights thereafter.

“Hey, I love your necklace,” someone sitting a few seats away from Carmen said. The lights had come back on, and we were waiting on Nick to come out so that he could take her out.

“Oh, thanks,” she responded. “So how do you know the Boys? Do you work here?”

“No,” she shook her head. “I’m… friends with Howie.”

I laughed at her guarded answer. Howie would of course want to protect her identity from the public and jealous fans. Loving the Backstreet Boys could bring out the best in people at times.

But the worst in them other times.

I didn’t know why interviewers bothered prying about their relationships. Usually, the standard answer was: single.

“Are you Diana?” I asked.

“Yes,” Diana was puzzled.

“I’m August, and this is Carmen.”

A smile appeared on her face. She’d heard of us, too. Her face was round and friendly. She was short, with dark brown hair and matching eyes. A few minutes into the conversation, I already felt like we were friends. Diana was like the anti-Natasha. She was in her late 20s and worked in real estate. Howie had met her when he’d decided to look into developing condos.

“I’m kind of sad the tour is getting so close. I’m not going to be able to take much time off of work to see him while he’s traveling,” she bit her lip. “But I’m so happy for them, selling all the shows out the way that they did.”

I nodded, but wasn’t really listening anymore. I was remembering how long it had seemed like he’d been in L.A. for. That was nothing compared to how long he’d be gone this time. Still, he’d called often, so hopefully he would again.

Although his words were still ringing in the back of my mind. Brian had said he didn’t have to call. That the two of us weren’t anything. Even though this statement had been a product of the fight, it worried me. What if he meant more to me than I did to him? What if, once he got on the road…

“Hello,” Carmen waved a hand in front of my face.

“Oh,” I snapped back into the present.

“Welcome back,” Carmen said, dryly. “I’ll see you later, okay?” She’d seen that Nick was heading over. Howie was with him.

“I see you three got to meet each other,” he said, slipping his hand into Diana’s.

“Yeah. Hopefully we’ll see you again soon,” I said to her.

“Definitely,” she smiled back.

Carmen said, “We’ll have to think of some fun stuff to do while these guys are traveling the globe.”

“As long as you don’t have too much fun without me,” Howie grinned at Diana.

“We can’t make any promises…” I joked.

“Ooh, there’s that new restaurant opening up downtown,” Carmen remembered.

“Look at that, D,” Nick said. “We ain’t even gone yet, and they’re already counting down the minutes…”

“You may have to work hard to make a lasting impression on us,” I said. “Or we’re going to be ‘Backstreet who?’”

I felt someone grab my waist and then the sensation of falling backwards. Instinctively I reached up and wrapped my arms around someone’s neck for stability. Brian’s face was suddenly in mine, and before I could say a word he was kissing me.

A few fast-paced heartbeats later, he was setting me on my feet again.

“Boys,” Brian said. “Backstreet Boys.”

“Huh?” I was light-headed, trying to remember the conversation.

He had that mischievous look in his eyes and looked pleased with himself.

“I guess you won’t go and forget us now,” Nick laughed.

“Well, I’m safe Nick, but that doesn’t mean you are,” Brian shook his head.

Nick reached out, making motions as if he was going to do the same thing, but Brian put his arm around me.

“Don’t even think about it, Carter,” Brian said, he shoved him away. “Don’t you have someplace to be?”

“As a matter of fact, I do,” Nick nodded and turned to Carmen. “You ready?”

The two of them left the group, only to be replaced by AJ and Natasha.

“Hey Natasha. How are you?” Diana asked.

“Not too bad,” Natasha said, not bothering to ask Diana how she was. “We’re going back to watch a movie, you two want to come?”

Diana and Howie exchanged looks. “Sure,” he answered.

“What about you?” AJ turned to us. “Rok?”

From the look on Natasha’s face, it didn’t look like she had been planning to extend the invitation to us. She didn’t voice her objection, though.

Brian looked at his watch. “It’s not too late… why not. August?”

I agreed, and the six of us headed to AJ’s house.