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“You had the dream again, didn’t you?”

I gave a little nod and Dianna pressed a cup of hot coffee into my hands.

“How many times is that this week?” She took a spot next to me on the davenport.

I took a sip of the scalding liquid and held up a hand, showing three fingers. It had been four days since she had announced she was setting me up on a date. And the second time since then that I’d had the dream. And again, I woke up fighting it, wanting to live.

Dianna gave a nod and took a drink of her own beverage. “I still say you should talk to somebody.”

“I don’t need a shrink. I’m not crazy.” The last person I wanted to talk to was a head doctor. They’d only spout off different disorders they were sure I had then prescribe me on probably ten different types of drugs.

“They’re not just for crazy people, ya know.” She tucked some of her curly dark hair behind her ear.

I gave a little shrug and sipped the coffee. “I still don’t want to talk to anyone.”

“You don’t have to. But it might help you understand what’s going on.” Dianna was a big fan of therapy.

I had never actually told Dianna what the dreams entailed; just that they were nightmares and would keep me awake hours on end. She had tried to pry once, but when I refused to give details, she relented and hasn’t asked again. “I’ll be okay.” I blew into the hot drink, my hands wrapped around the mug, letting the warmth seep through me, chasing away the chill.

She was quiet for a few moments then spoke again, changing the subject. “So I asked you over this morning because I have news.”

I glanced her way. “You’re pregnant?”

Her nose wrinkled as she made a face. “God, no. You know I don’t want any little brats running around here.”

“They’re only brats if you raise them that way.”

“I’ll leave the baby making to you.”

I lowered the mug to my lap. “It does take two to procreate.”

“Well… after this next weekend maybe there will be two.” Her chocolate eyes glimmered with amusement.

I blinked and stared at her. “…. What?”

Dianna chuckled and leaned forward, setting her mug onto a coaster on the coffee table. “I’ve found you a date.”

“What? Already? This soon?” I really thought it would take her at least a month. I wanted time to get used to the idea first.

She nodded and shifted sideways to face me, resting her elbow on the back of the couch and drawing one leg up under her. She wore a pair of worn in faded blue jeans and a yellow t-shirt with the name of some art school across the front. “Yes. And he’s a really good guy. I think you’ll like him.”

I watched her cautiously. “Where’d you find him?”

“Down at the joint. He’s just been paroled for assault.”

“Very funny.”

She gave her hearty laugh. “I thought so. Seriously though, he’s a good guy.”

I took another drink of the coffee. “Where’d you find him?”

“He’s an architect and he worked with Manuel on his last project. I met him at the opening a few weeks back. He’s decent, has a good job, comfortable in his finances and is really good looking.” She lifted her brows at me.

I watched her over my mug of coffee, nerves suddenly appearing in my stomach at the thought of having a date. “What’s… he look like?”

Dianna shifted and tilted her head. “Well, he’s tall … about six feet, with dark hair and stunning blue eyes. Has a nice build and a chiseled jaw line. He’s 32 and never been married.”

I gave a little nod. Sounded like a good guy so far. “What’s his name?”

“Andrew Holden.”

“Andrew Holden.” I repeated the name before taking another sip of my coffee. “Sounds like a strong name.”

“Well, he’s a strong guy.”

“Did you um… does he…” I searched for the words.

“Have I told him about you and set anything up?” She chose them for me.

I gave a silent nod and she continued. “Yes, he knows about you and he wants to meet you.”

That made my stomach twist and I had to set my own coffee cup down for fear of spilling it when my hands began to tremble. “What all did you tell him?”

Dianna gave a little shrug. “Just that you’ve been here about a year, you’re from the East … you just got your real estate license and you agreed to let me set you up with someone.”

“Not about Hugh?”

“No, honey.” She touched my shoulder. “That’s your baggage, not mine to give.”

I nodded, very appreciative of that fact. “I … don’t want to meet him alone.”

“You want like… a double date?”

“Yes…” I chewed my cheek some, feeling foolish for being so apprehensive and nervous. “I just… it’s … been awhile and … I…”

Dianna squeezed my hand. “Hey, it’s okay. Baby steps…I get that. Okay, I’ll set something up. You have any preference for when?”

I was glad that I had met and become friends with Dianna. Everyone needed a Dianna Torres in their lives. “Uh…maybe next to never?” I twisted a hand in the bottom of my shirt, suddenly not sure if I wanted to do this anymore.

“How ‘bout I just pick something and let you know.”

“That works too.”

She nodded and leaned, picking her coffee cup up once more. “Good. Now … tell me about the latest house you sold and how much commission you made from it.”

~*~*~*~*~

Tuesday afternoon Dianna called to inform me that our double date was scheduled for Saturday evening promptly at seven pm. We would be going to Malo, a trendy Mexican style restaurant on Sunset Ave in Los Angeles. Sticking true to Manuel’s roots I teased her. She laughed and told me she’d be coming by Thursday to take me shopping because she was sure I didn’t have anything date worthy in my closet. I agreed and we hung up.

I stared at the phone a few moments after replacing it in the receiver. A date… with a handsome architect named Andrew. Was this the right thing I was doing? Hugh wouldn’t have wanted me alone and miserable… but was I really ready? The idea of going on a first date again petrified me, but I had to push through. Dianna wasn’t going to let me out of it and if I even tried, she’d just end up bringing everyone here and whipping up some lasagna or something. Besides, she had told me this was just me getting my feet wet. I didn’t have to see him again after if I chose not to. That squelched the knot forming in my stomach somewhat and I finally moved from the kitchen to the family room.

Daisy was standing at the patio doors staring outside, patiently waiting. She glanced my way when I entered and shifted her back legs, a tell tale sign that she had some business to take care of.

“I’m sorry, hon.” I made an apologetic face and crossed the room to the door, unhitching the latch and sliding it open. She was outside in a flash, her head low as she began to sniff along the ground, trying to find the perfect place to do her thing. I stood observing her a moment, half expecting her to canter out of the yard and back down to the beach, but she behaved, instead squatting to relieve herself.

I left the door open and moved to the large mahogany desk against the opposite wall, sinking into the chair and pulling my work folders from the desk drawer. I had a few houses I was going to be showing tomorrow and I needed to make sure I was prepared and knew my facts. That was the worst thing; going into a house showing unprepared and knowing nothing about the place. Who wants to buy a house from someone who can’t tell them anything about it?

Thirty minutes late I lifted my head from the fact sheet I was pouring over and glanced around, finding the house a little too quiet for my benefit. “Daisy?” Whenever the place was too quiet, it usually meant the Lab was getting into something she shouldn’t be; like the potted plants or my shoes.

There was no response and I leaned back in the chair, glancing around the room and down the hall into the kitchen. “Daisy?” I called a little louder.

Still no response, so I rose from my chair, noticing I hadn’t shut the patio door yet. Maybe she was still outside, sunbathing.

Reaching the doors and stepping outside, I glanced around, finding the backyard empty. “Daisy?” I called a bit louder, expecting her to come around from the side of the house.

But no chocolate Labrador came racing towards me and I began to panic; what if someone had taken her? My eyes scanned the yard once more and then landed on the wooden stairs. That mongrel had probably snuck off once more.

I made it to the steps and onto the beach, still finding no Daisy. I did find a girl that looked no older than ten building a sandcastle.

“Um, excuse me?”

She looked my way, her red hair tied in pigtails and her nose and cheeks spotted with freckles. “Yeah?” Her little hands never stopped packing the sand firmly into the bucket.

“Have you seen a chocolate Lab go by?”

She pointed in the direction Daisy had gone almost a week ago then turned back to her task at hand.

I called out a thank you and hurried that way, knowing exactly where to go and wondering if the Bernese Mountain dog would be back as well.

They were both there; lying together on the sand and letting the sun warm their bodies. It was a sweet sight and if I hadn’t been annoyed at Daisy’s antics I might have wanted to get a picture. Yes, Daisy was now officially a teenager.

Moving to her side, I dropped down into the sand next to her and ruffled her head. I was relieved that she hadn’t been snatched by any dog-nappers, but annoyed that she was now sneaking out of the house. “You have got to quit sneaking away from me.” I said as she lifted her head and tilted it some, enjoying the scratching behind her ears that I was now doing.

Next to her, the Bernese watched me with keen eyes before giving a yawn and stretching in the sand, deeming me harmless.

I noticed he wore a black collar decorated with little skulls. “Do your owners know you’re out here?” I questioned him as Daisy shifted and about lay in my lap, knocking me onto my butt. I laughed low at that and gently pushed her from my legs. “Careful there, girl.”

She licked at my hands then settled back next to her partner in crime.

I leaned over and kissed her head then gently reached towards her friend. “What’s your name, huh?” I held my hand near his nose and let him sniff at me, watching as he gently licked my palm. I was no threat to him he seemed to be informing me. Relaxed, and not worried about him trying to take a bite out of me, I gently lifted the silver tag that hung from the collar, reading what was etched on it. His name was Bernie and there was a phone number under that.

I gave his head a gentle pat before standing and brushing the sand from my jeans. He had to belong to the people that lived up from the beach there. I wondered if they knew their dog had a private little love nest in the alcove. Snapping my fingers, I got Daisy’s attention and motioned for her to come. “C’mon, I know you wanna stay with your lover boy, but I have a lot of work to do.”

She slowly rose to her feet then shook her body, sending pieces of sand flying every which way.

“Thank you for that.” I chuckled and dusted myself off.

Sending me a look I was sure that was telling me that was what I got for dragging her away, she trotted past me and headed back down the beach towards our house.

Bernie watched without moving a muscle and I studied him for a moment. “I sure hope you aren’t worrying your people sick, and they know you’re down here.”

He just looked at me with his sullen brown eyes, his head resting on his front paws.

I gave a little sigh and nodded my head. “Yeah, I’m sure they do.” Then I turned and headed back along the path, watching as Daisy trotted along back to our backyard, pausing only once to sniff at a piece of driftwood.

~*~*~*~*~

“Daisy has a boyfriend.”

“She what?” Dianna watched me a little confused.

I looked over the black skirt that she had put me in, smoothing it some. “Do you think this is too short? I think it’s too short? Is it too short?” I turned my gaze back to my friend. “Well, a dog-friend. Is that the right word?”

She was staring at me, a little confused by my announcement. We were standing in one of the dressing rooms at Nordstrom’s, trying to decide what I should be wearing on my first date. “Where did she get this …dog-friend?”

“She met him on the beach.” I turned to examine the skirt from the back. “Maybe I should wear pants.” I was trying to get myself used to the idea of the date, running over and over in my head ‘just getting my feet wet’.

“No, you should wear this skirt. It shows your fabulous legs off.” She pursed her lips at me, not liking the pant wearing decision. “Well, I think its wonderful Daisy found herself a dog-friend. Now they can have little puppies and live happily ever after.”

“No, she’s fixed. There won’t be any little puppies.”

“Then you’ll have to adopt some.”

I chuckled low and slipped the skirt off, pulling my jeans back on and buttoning them. “Yeah, no. One dog is more than enough for me. She’s been sneaking out to see him.”

“Ooh, a rebel dog.”

“More like a teenage one in love.”

Dianna chuckled low and gathered the skirt. “So, we’re taking this. Now we just have to find you a top.”

I smoothed my clothes and slipped back into my shoes, grabbing up my purse. “Yeah, I suppose.”

My friend undid the latch on the dressing room door and pulled it open, exiting out. “I saw some really nice ones out here. We’ll find one in no time.”

I followed her out, trailing behind as she made her way between the racks of clothes. “You do realize that it’s been like … over five years since I’ve been on a first date.”

“Things haven’t changed, Morgan.” She began rifling through different brightly colored tops. “And you’ll have Manuel and me there. It’s going to be just fine. Andrew is a really great guy and I know you’ll like him.”

I nodded. “I’m just getting my feet wet.”

She cast a glance my way. “That’s all I ask.”

“Baby steps.”

She pulled out a teal, sleeveless, flyaway top and held it towards me, tilting her head and squinting her eyes some as if she were imagining it on me. “That’s right, baby steps.”

“Daisy has a boyfriend.”

“A dog-friend.” She corrected me.

“Right.” I nodded my head firmly. “A dog-friend.”

Dianna paused and looked at me. “That’s symbolic, right? She’s moving on and found another male companion. Showing you that … you can do that as well.”

I lifted my brows. “Well... it’s a little different. Hugh wasn’t her husband.”

“It’s still symbolic.” She shoved a few shirts my way. “Let’s try these on.”

Back to the dressing room we went, Dianna running back and forth between the floor and the room I was in, tossing different shirts my way. After about the 500th top, we finally found the one that she deemed good enough and paid for my purchases, making a pit stop at the Smoothing King before continuing on our way to Aldo’s where we were sure to find the perfect shoe, as my shopping partner explained it.

“I had the dream again last night.”

Dianna glanced to me as we strolled the corridor towards Aldo, sipping on our strawberry and banana smoothies. “How many times this week?”

“Just last night.”

“Are you ever going to tell me what it’s about?”

“No.” I shook my head.

“I still think you should talk to a therapist.”

I made a face. “I don’t need a therapist. I’m okay. I agreed to this date, right?”

“Right.” She watched me a moment before speaking again. “This is your time, Morgan. You moved out here for a new life and that’s what you’re getting. And there are some things that will have to be left in the past. But you won’t lose your memories.”

I stared into my drink, her words hitting home. When I spoke, it was low and in an uncertain tone. “What if I do?”

She shook her head, her curls softly brushing her cheeks. “Time has no hold over memories of love. You won’t forget them; they’re too important to you. Hugh’s memories don’t have to go anywhere. You just have to learn to make room for new ones.”

I gave a nod, feeling that lump forming in my throat. Hugh’s memories were the most important thing to me.

Dianna reached out and gently touched my shoulder. “It’s time you learned to let him go.”

“I don’t want to betray him.” My blue eyes shone with tears.

She gave a sympathetic sigh. “You’re not betraying him. You honor his memory but you also make room for new ones, with someone new, who will honor his memory with you.” Her fingers brushed my shoulder as she pulled her hand back. “You let him go, Morgan. Hugh is gone, but you’re not. And you have to live your life. You have to be happy.”

I gave a nod and wiped at the corners of my eyes, taking her words to heart. Bits and pieces of my dream came back to me and I thought on how it had changed to me struggling to live at the end. I think my subconscious was telling me something; I wanted to be happy too.