Later that night, after Mike left to try and forget what he had done, Taylor dragged herself into the bath tub to soak. As she sat in the warm bath, she remembered how it used to be with Mike. He had started out as a very sweet and loving person, albeit a little intense at times. She and Mike had been together for three years, two of those years spent in the same house. Time and again Taylor tried to figure out why she couldn't just leave him. Her reasoning always fell back to the same answer; she was more fearful of being alone than she was of Mike.

It hadn't always been like this, but as of late Mike's temper had gotten progressively worse. The last year or so with Mike had made her very good at preventative medicine. A long bath and a couple of drinks would help ease the pain for the night, but when the morning came the real agony would set in. She hadn't found a way yet to prevent that.

Mike was pretty brutal tonight and Taylor wondered if she might actually have a cracked rib this time. She tentatively passed a hand over her side and tried not to cry out from the pain the movement caused. The bath didn't help much but she told herself to toughen up as she got out of the tub and once again snuggled into her robe. With a stiff drink in hand, she wandered out to the backyard. She settled into a comfortable patio chair and stared up at the sky as if she were looking for answers.

Taylor sighed to herself as she pondered her situation. Surely keeping in contact with Nick would cause nothing but more pain; if not from Mike, then from Nick himself. Was Nick really a risk she wanted to take? Was he really worth it? Probably not, he wasn't that special, she decided finally. Resigning herself to what she thought was the right thing, she picked up the phone and dialed Jamie's number.

Jamie had just begun to fall asleep when she heard the phone ringing. Groaning, she glanced at the clock. Two thirty in the morning, who would be calling at this time of night? She thought about not answering it, but decided to pick it up in case it was important. She rolled over and answered the phone in a sleepy voice, "Hello. . .?"

"Hey Heads, it's me. . ." Taylor said softly.

Waking up a little, Jamie could tell something was wrong, "Hey you, what's wrong?" She sat up and reached out to turn on the light.

"Nothing, just wanted to hear your voice, that's all." But Taylor's tone sounded as if she was trying to hide the fact she had been crying.

"You're lying, I can tell. Besides, you only call this late when something is wrong."

"Can't I just call you? Seriously Jamie, nothing's wrong."

"Uh huh, I don't believe you. What did Mike and you fight about this time?" Jamie only thought that Taylor and Mike fought a lot, and that he verbally abused her. Taylor never told her the complete truth, in part because it was Taylor's natural reaction to deny to the world that anything was going on.

"Oh, nothing important, just the usual stuff. He's under a lot of stress at work, and I guess I didn't help any." Taylor paused. While she knew that Jamie had always been there for her, Taylor was still uncomfortable with the thought of telling her. But Jamie just worried a lot about her friend, so Taylor had to say something. "It's not. . . it's not that bad. I'll be fine."

"You say that every time Tails. You know eventually you won't be fine. I still don't understand why you put up with him."

Thinking that it was a good idea to try to change the subject and lighten the mood, Taylor said "Yeah, well, you'll never guess who called me tonight?"

Sensing her reluctance to go on about Mike, Jamie decided to humor her friend and play along. "Umm, let's see. President Clinton right? He wants to nominate you for the Supreme Court?"

"Don't I wish. . ." Taylor laughed a little, but stopped when she felt a pain in her side. "No, but almost as good, I guess. Nick called."

"Oh really?" Jamie smiled. She knew that Nick had wanted so badly to talk to Taylor ever since the trial ended. "And what did my little brother have to say?"

"Not much, we didn't talk for very long." Taylor realized she shouldn't let Jamie know how happy she was to hear from Nick or she wouldn't go along with her plan. "It was nice to hear from him."

"I can imagine. He really cares about you, you know that don't you?"

"Yeah, I kind of got that impression."

"You're all he talks about. It's driving Kevin and the rest of them crazy." Jamie added dryly, "Although Kev does think it's an improvement over video games."

Taylor sighed. "Yeah, well he'll get over that. He knows that I'm with Mike and that. . ." she stopped abruptly, realizing she had almost said too much.

"And what Tails?"

"Nothing, just that I'm not planning on leaving Mike, no matter what I think of Nick."

"So you do think of Nick?" asked Jamie.

Taylor made a frustrated noise. "Not like that. He's a sweet kid and all, but there isn't anything there."

"He'd be annoyed if he heard you refer to him as a kid you know. And you are such a liar, it's not even funny. You do like Nick, more than I think you're willing to admit to yourself."

Hating the fact that Jamie was sometimes too perceptive about Taylor and her feelings, she tried to backtrack. "Jaim, look. I do like Nick, you're right. But as a friend, there are too many differences between us to be anything more than that. The difference is I like Nick, yes, but I love Mike."

It was Jamie's turn to groan with frustration. "You know I swear if I didn't know better, Mike has some kind of hold on you that makes you afraid of leaving him. What is it?" Taylor's eyes widened as she heard Jamie innocently explain their relationship. "Do you really like arguing and fighting that much, Taylor? I realize you're a lawyer, and as lawyers we all love to argue, but there's gotta be some limit somewhere."

"No," Taylor replied softly. "No, that's not it." She turned in the chair to get more comfortable, and winced as she felt her side pull painfully again.

"Are you all right?" asked Jamie sharply. Taylor realized she must have exclaimed out loud, and she cursed silently.

"Um, yeah. I hurt myself earlier tonight, and I must have moved the wrong way."

Jamie was much more alert now. "What do you mean, you hurt yourself?"

"I, uh, ran into something," offered Taylor lamely.

"Like what, Mike's hand?" Taylor had forgotten that Mike had slapped Taylor in a fight once in front of Jamie. It was the only awareness Jamie had that their fights might be more than just verbal, and it was also one of the reasons Jamie disliked Mike so much. Taylor had spent a lot of time convincing Jamie it was a one time thing, but Jamie wasn't easily convinced. Taylor had to disabuse her of her guess, otherwise Jamie would never agree to help her.

"No," she said with as much conviction as she could muster.

Jamie was silent for a minute, then said, "Okay." Taylor knew she didn't believe her, but there wasn't much she could do about it right now.

Jamie decided to change the subject again, but only slightly. "Are you going to be nice to Nick now?"

"What do you mean?"

"You said you like him as a friend, will you let him be your friend?"

Taylor considered for a minute, then finally answered, "No, I don't think so."

"What? Why not? Do you realize what you're doing Taylor?" Jamie was exasperated.

"What do you mean?"

"You are blocking out every positive opportunity in your life and wallowing in some self-pitying, wanna-be-a-martyr-all-my-life thing."

"Jamie, I don't exactly see Nick as a 'positive opportunity.' And I am not wallowing."

"Of course you don't, but only because you don't want to see it Taylor. He is a good person and he really does care about you. I'm not saying Nick is perfect, no one is. But you'll never see that will you? You won't consider anything that might actually make you happy, like having him as your friend. That's all I'm asking here."

"Please, Jamie. . ." Taylor was crying by this time, knowing that her friend was right but unsure how to make things right. She felt things had gone too far for her to turn them around.

"I love you Taylor, but I honestly don't know how much more of this I can take. You need to make some changes in your life and Nick and I are both offering to help you make those changes. Please don't shut either of us out."

"Jamie please, just listen to me for a minute." Taylor bit her lip hoping her best friend would understand and help her this time. "I need a big favor from you."

It was hard for Jamie to sit back and watch one of the people she loved most in this world suffer like this, but for the most part she knew there wasn't much she could do. Jamie took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm listening."

"I need. . .I need you to call Nick for me and tell him that I can't talk to him again."

"You're joking right? Did you even hear what I just said to you?"

"Yes, I heard you, and no, I'm serious about this. I promised him tonight that I would talk to him again and I said some things to him that I shouldn't have. I can't talk to him again Jamie, I just can't."

Jamie had a feeling this was all related to tonight's fight with Mike, and she thought she knew why Taylor felt she couldn't risk calling Nick again. "And what exactly am I supposed to tell Nick, Taylor?"

"I don't know. . .just. . .just tell him that I thought about it and I changed my mind. That things would never work anyway."

"Tell me one thing Taylor. How am I supposed to convince him of that when neither you nor I believe it?"

"I do believe it. It wouldn't work."

"Maybe not but you'll never know for sure because you won't give him a chance. Nick deserves that chance, and so do you."

Taylor closed her eyes, "I just can't do it Jamie, I'm not strong enough to fight for all this right now. Sometimes it's just better to leave things alone."

"When did you give up fighting for what you want, Taylor? My best friend used to fight hard for what she believed in, but I'm not sure I know who this person you've become is anymore."

Crying openly, Taylor made one final plea for Jamie to talk to Nick. "Please Jamie, if you will do me this one last favor I promise that I will try to start fighting again. I need you to help me is all."

"You actually want me to help you? You're asking for my help? Dammit I hate when you go all soft on me," Jamie chuckled ruefully. "All right, fine. Are you sure you really want me to tell Nick to stay out of your life?"

"Well, not like that, but yeah, it's what's best for everyone."

"I won't be that blunt, I do know how to be tactful sometimes," said Jamie wryly. "You do realize though that you will have to see him every so often, because he's in my life. Hell, I sometimes see him and the others more than even I want because of my relationship with Kevin. But you do understand he won't be gone completely, right?"

"Yes, I know. But that's different, because he'll be your friend not mine. I can handle him being on the fringe, but right now I can't deal with him directly."

"He also may be not believe it coming from me," she warned. "He may call you anyway to make sure."

Taylor shook her head, even though Jamie couldn't see her, "No, I think he'll be more likely to believe it if you tell him. He won't call me again."

"You that afraid of him, Tayl?" she asked softly.

"No, I'm not afraid of him, Jaim," Taylor said. They ended the conversation soon afterwards. As Taylor hung up the phone, she thought to herself, "No, it's not Nick I'm afraid of, Jamie. It's me and what I'll do that scares me to death."