"When did the dreams begin?" Dr. campbell prompted, flipping open her notebook and grabbing a pen out of her desk drawer.

'Oh great,' Emily thought to herself, 'this is all going down as written record.'

"Don't worry," Dr. Campbell smiled, obviously having noted her unease, "Anything you say in this room stays in this room. Nothing goes beyond you, me and these four walls."

Emily nodded and sighed, she should have known, afterall wasn't that the whole doctor patient confidentiality thing. But seriously... could that be trusted?

Who knew. Did it really matter now?

"Well," she finally began as she fidgeted in her seat, trying her best to convince herself that she could indeed go through with this, "the nightmares, if you can really call them nightmares, began when I spent the summer out in LA with my brother."

She nodded, "And about how long ago was that?"

"Um... about a year and a half ago... in 2006," Emily thought back to that summer in her head and nodded, "yeah, in the summer of 2006."

"Alright," Dr. Campbell replied as she took down notes in her book, "what were you doing in LA that summer? Anything special or different?"

Emily nodded again, "My brother, Nick, was filming a show for tv. A show with his other brother and sisters. I was supposed to do the show too, but I decided not to."

Dr. Campbell chewed on the end of her pen for a second as she thought before going on, "What made you decide not to do the show?"

"Umm..." Emily hesitated here, rubbing her hands together in her lap. She wasn't really sure what her deciding not to do her brother's reality tv show had to do with nightmares... but she went on anyway, "Well, the very first day in the house there was a huge fight between Nick and his sister BJ. She didn't want me in the house."

"Why is that?"

Emily stared at Dr. Campbell for a minute. This was not a moment from her life that she wanted to relive. It had been bad enough when it had happened.

"She said that I didn't belong there because I hand't been through half the stuff they'd been through in their lives," she took her eyes away from the doctor's and stared down at the floor. It sucked as much thinking about what she'd said to her as it had been when she'd actually been standing right in front of her hearing it for herself.

"And how did that make you feel?" Dr. Campbell pressed.

"Angry," Emily stated without any hesitation, because that answer was easy.

"Why angry?"

"Because..." she could feel the tears stinging her eyes and for a brief moment she was back in that room, standing in front of Nick and BJ, and she could see the smirk on BJ's face... and she could hear her giggle.

She'd let her win.

Emily shook her head and wiped a tear that had slipped down her cheek, "... because she has no idea what I've been through in my life."

Dr. Campbell didn't seemed bothered by her tears and for that she was thankful. Amazingly she didn't feel embarassed to be crying... or ashamed.

"You said you chose not to be a part of the show," she continued after giving her a few minutes, "does this mean you left the house?"

Emily nodded. "I didn't want to do the show in the first place. I never wanted to. Nick's brother and sisters, even if biologically they are my half siblings," and she made air quotes when she said the word 'half siblings', "have never really been a part of my life. And I have never really been a part of theirs. I only ever agreed to do the show because of Nick."

"So then you left the show because of this argument?" Dr. Campbell continued the conversation, not giving Emily too much time to think about all of the depressing details.

"Well that was definitely part of it," she answered, "but there was more than that... I mean the moment I arrived at that house I knew there was no way I was going to be able to stay there..."

Emily stopped, amazed at how easily the words were coming. At how easily these things were flowing from her lips. Things that for months and months she couldn't even verbalize within her own mind, now she was saying them out loud. For some reason it was so easy to talk to this woman. It was different than talking to Nick, or to her father, or to any of the other guys... or her friends. She didn't feel like Dr. Campbell was judging her, at all. She just knew it was her job to listen... not to judge people.

Dr. Campbell's voice shook her from her thoughts, "Why couldn't you stay there?"

Emily took another deep breath as the tears began to steadily slip down her cheeks. She shook her head and wiped them quickly away and finally said the words that she knew she needed to say, "It was that room." She finally answered, sucking back a sob and staring down toward the floor in shame, "I couldn't stand that room."

Emily closed her eyes, willing herself far away from that place. She could sense Dr. Campbell standing from behind her desk. She could sense her move around until she was seated right beside her.

"What was it about the room Emily?"

"It uh... it..." she took a deep breath, but couldn't seem to get the words to this one to come out.

"You can do this."

She breathed again, knowing she had to answer the question... and so, she did.

"Nick had decorated it to look exactly like the room I grew up in. The room in my mother's house in Florida." She answered the question without ever opening her eyes to look at Dr. Campbell. She could hear her scribbling down notes though as she sat there focusing intently on trying to remain calm.

"Where is your mother Emily?"

Emily let out the breath of air she'd been holding in. Somehow even though she'd known this question would come up... even though she'd figured at some point during all of this she would have to talk about it... she wasn't ready for this. She took another deep breath before she finally answered.

"She's dead."

Dr. Campbell nodded, as if this was a piece of information, like any other piece of information... something to be taken in, processed and written down on paper.

To Dr. Campbell, this was not a big secret. Not a big bombshell being dropped in her lap. Emily needed to realize that not much she could say would come as a big surprise to this woman who was probably used to hearing way worse problems in people's lives then, "my mother's been dead for five years."

"How did your mother die," she continued without missing a beat.

"She died in a car accident when I was 13. That's why I live with Nick now."

Emily could hear her scratching furiously on her piece of paper and she opened her eyes briefly to look over towards her. Dr. Campbell looked up and caught her eye. She gave her a reassuring nod and asked, "Was there anyone else involved in the accident?"

Emily closed her eyes again and dropped her head back towards the floor. She dug her fingernails into the palms of her hands and repeated calmly to herself, "you can do this... you can do this. You have to talk about this... you can do this."

"Yes." she finally answered after a few moments pause. She leaned forward and rested her head in her hands. "My mother's boyfriend, Chris. He died in the accident too... and... and I was there too. But I got thrown from the car."

She could feel her heart start to race when she mentioned his name. She hadn't spoken about him at all since the accident. Not even mentioning him to Nick or Bob, or anyone else. They only knew that that there had been a man who'd died in the accident too. She wasn't sure why they'd never asked her about him... maybe because she'd never volunteered. Or maybe because they already knew more than she imagined.

"Do you remember the accident Emily?" Dr. Campbell pressed on.

Emily shrugged. She wasn't sure how many more of these questions she could answer. This was getting more difficult with each passing moment, and she knew it wasn't going to get any easier. Things like these never got any easier.

"No," she finally answered... "I remember being at school that day... and waking up in the hospital after. But that's it."

Thinking about the accident and her mother's death took her back to that day. She remembered waking up in a dimly lit hospital room, in a warm hospital bed. The monitors around her were beeping crazily. She remembered how her head hurt so bad that she could hardly see. And she remember how sick to her stomach she'd felt. Then she remembered Nick's face appearing above her, followed by their father's. She remembered asking where her mother was... and she remembered the moment they'd told her she'd died. She remembered that like it had happened only a second ago. That was one of those moments in life that a person could never possibly forget.

The tears were falling steadily down her cheeks now as Dr. Campbell passed her the box of tissues and watched as she took one and dabbed her cheeks dry. "Do you think," Emily asked, choking back a sob, "could be take a break for a minute?"

Dr. Campbell nodded and stood, walking over to a small refrigerator across the room, as Emily struggled to regain her composure. "We can sit and relax for a few minutes," she agreed as she pulled out a couple of bottle of water. "Would you like some?"

Emily nodded her head as Dr. Campbell returned to the chair beside hers and handed her a bottle. "Thanks."

They sat together for a few moments and just talked. No pressure... no psychology, just talk. Dr. Campbell asked her how she liked living in Florida, if she was enjoying New York and what Broadway shows she was going to see. The small talk helped ease Emily's mind... which was probably the whole point.

After a few minutes she grabbed her notebook once again and asked if she was ready to go on.

Emily nodded.

She was as ready as she'd ever be.