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Chapter Six
When Nick and I entered the lobby Kevin and Marcus came running by at top speed. “Hey!” I yelled. Kevin slowed down after turning around after he found out that it was me who called out. “Come on! We need to hurry!” “What’s going on?” Nick said speaking up. “Denise just called us to say that...” My phone rang just as Kevin was about to tell me what was going on. “Yeah.” I said into the phone. “Alex you need to hurry back because it’s Allison.” She said. “Why, what’s going on with her?” I asked. “Is that your mom?” Kevin asked. “It is.” I said. “Then tell her you’re on your way and I’ll explain.” “Mom I ran into Kev in the lobby. He said he’d explain.” “Okay, then hurry.” She said as she hung up. “Kev, what’s going on?” I asked. “She had a massive asthma attack then went into cardiac arrest.” Kevin said. “Where is she located?” I yelled as Nick and I flew past them. “Down one flight and she’s in room A5 to the left of the elevator.” Kevin yelled. I wanted to get to her fast so we skipped the elevator and ran right to the stairs and basically flew down them.

When we got to the basement Nick was pretty much in tears already when he almost ran into a few nurses at they were entering Allison’s room. I stopped suddenly when I saw security and her doctor heading towards us. “Alex may I speak to you please?” Dr. Livingston asked. “Um... Whatever it was I didn’t do it.” I said. “Oh, no you’re fine. I just need to talk to you about some things.” She said. “Okay.” I said following her. Nick stayed behind waiting for the others to show up. The doctor and I went into another room to talk. She pulled up a chair to sit and offered me one. Then she spoke. “First off I have some good news and some not so good.” “What’s the good news first?” I asked looking at her. “Well the good news is we can save the baby because Allison was farther along then she thought.” “By how much?” “Far enough along for the baby to breathe on her own.” “And Allison?” “We are not sure if she’ll make through the night. But she is a fighter and you never know.” “May I go see her?” I asked. “Let me go check on how she’s doing and if she’s awake first.” “Okay, I’ll just wait here.” I said.

While waiting for the doctor to get back I pulled out the ring I had picked out for her. I know it had only been a week sense I last asked her but I wanted this now more then ever. If I was going to loose her I want to loose her as my wife. I would also have two things out of this. Her as my wife and our baby. I placed the ring on the table and then placed my hands on my face. I couldn’t believe that this was even happening. I didn’t think after all these years that I was ever going to loose another girlfriend. This was more different. This is the mother of my first born child. The love of my life, the keeper of the key to my heart. The very woman who I want to grow old with.

As Dr. Livingston was walking back into the room she spotted the ring. She picked up the black velvet box and admired it for a moment. “She’s going to love this ring.” She said handing it back to me. "What if she won’t take it? It has been only a week.” “Alex you’ve been here for her everyday for almost two weeks. That should mean something.” She said. “I hope you’re right about that.” “Well, she’s awake so you can go see her.” She said smiling and I tried giving one back. Then I got up and walked over to her room door. I took a deep breath and then opened the door. She was lying in her bed hooked up to all kinds of machines. It was kind of scary. “Alex?” She said barely in a whisper. “Hey baby girl.” I whispered as I walked over to her. “How are you feeling?” “I’ve felt better. Kind of lightheaded though.” I tried my hardest not to cry. “Where is everyone? I saw Nick and Kev, but... I haven’t seen Howie or Brian.” She whispered. “Baby, I haven’t seen them for awhile. I was talking to your doctor.” “Alex what’s going on?” “They’re going to deliver the baby early tomorrow, but...” I couldn’t do it. I can’t tell her. “Alex, what is it?” “Baby, I can’t.” “Can’t what? What’s going on? Am I dying?” She asked. I stood there speechless. “Am I?” “They won’t know anything until they deliver the baby.” Kevin said standing by the door. “Kevy.” She said as he walked in. “Thanks man.” I said. “No prob.” Kevin said to Alex.

Kevin walked over to the bed and grabbed her hand. “Baby, I need to talk to AJ for a minute is that okay?” “Okay.” She said after taking a breath. Kevin and I walked into the hall to talk. “You need to tell her now. I just got done talking to Dr. Livingston and she just informed me that they need to get the baby out now and get her up to surgery.” “They found her a transplant?” I asked. “That and help control her asthma.” “That’s great news.” I said with a big grin. “Is there anything else I should know?” I asked Kevin. “No that was it.” “Good because I need to see my girl.” “ALEX!” Allison yelled. We ran back to her room after hearing her belt out my name. “Baby I’m frightened.” She said as I took her hand in mine. “You are going to be just fine. I will be with you every step of the way.” I said sitting down in the chair next to her bed. “Do you promise?” “Baby girl, I promise you I will never leave you alone for a second.” I looked up at Kevin with a worried look on my face. Should I have even said that in the first place? Should I even make promises that I can’t always keep? Well, right now I have to keep my promises to her. I can’t afford to loss her.

As I was sitting there holding her hand I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her. She is my beauty, my angel. I was afraid of also loosing her. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost her. I was getting tired so I placed my head on the bed but never let go of her hand. “Alex?” I sat back up when she said my name. “Yeah, baby.” “Will you be with me the whole time?” She asked. “I will. Every step.” I said lying my hand on her cheek. I gently started to stroke her cheek with my fingers. She gave me a smile as she started to fall asleep. About twenty minutes later the nurse came in to tell me that it was time to get her ready for the delivery. The nurse went over to her IV bag and started putting in some kind of medicine. “What are those for?” I asked. “Well this one is for the pain and this one is to help her sleep better.” The nurse said as she was injecting it into the IV tube. “They will be ready for her in about ten minutes to take her up for delivery.” “Are they doing the surgery after?” I asked. “I believe so.” She said before she left. “Thank you.” I said before I layed my head back down. Five minutes later there was a knock on the door. Nick and Kevin both walked in. “How is she?” Kevin asked. “They’ll be in soon to take her up to delivery.” I said. “Are you ready for all this?” Nick asked. I took a deep breath before responding. “I’m ready, as I’ll ever be.” I said forcing a grin. “Are they going to be doing the surgery afterwards?” Kevin said looking over at Allison. “They believe so but they won’t know for sure until the baby is born.” I said heading to the bathroom.

After walking out of the bathroom I saw that Nick was standing over by the bed talking to her. “Don’t leave me. You’re the only one I can talk too.” He started. I just stood there and listened to him. “Sweetie, that night when I was six and you let me lay with you in your bed. I always thought it would be you and me forever. But when that night before I left for tour and you told me about your boyfriend, I was heartbroken. Not because of the guy in your life but because it was Kevin. Then you started dating AJ. I got kind of jealous. I know I shouldn’t because we grew up together and you’re like an older sister to me but I am. I still am jealous of you.” He paused and took her hand in his. “This is just so hard to stand here looking at you and not cry. But I can’t loose you. Baby; AJ can’t loose you it’ll just break his heart if you ever left him. I stayed at Kevin’s last night and we were up most of the night talking. Can you believe Kevin even cried? The last time I saw him cry was at his wedding then when he found out that Kristin was pregnant. I knew these tears were different. These were tears out of fear of loosing someone close. We all don’t want to loose you. I know ‘D’ hasn’t been by much because this is also hard for him. Brian and Leighanne have been trying to help the best way they can.” Nick paused to try and clear his thoughts then continued. “Ally, I know I shouldn’t say this to you now but I had talked to AJ and he said I should tell you.” He stopped and closed his eyes. “I love you. I’ve always loved you. I know it’s wrong to express my feeling to you because you’re with someone. And you’re happy with him but I had to tell you.” He leaned in and whispered something in her ear. “AJ truly loves you with every fiber of his being. He’s not going to give up on you for one slight moment. He will do whatever it takes to make you his wife if it takes another six years to do. So please, please don’t leave us.” Nick said finishing as he layed his head down on the bed. “Nick, I love you too.” She whispered as she touched his hand.”

I walked over to him and placed my hand on his back. He looked up, saw me and gave me a small grin. “Did you hear that?” He asked. “I heard.” I said as they were coming to get her for delivery. As they were starting to roll her out of the room I heard her speak. “Alex, you’ll be with me?” “Yeah baby. I’ll be right there. I just need to talk to Nick for a sec.” I said. “Okay, but hurry. I don’t want to do this alone.” “Don’t worry your pretty brown eyes. You won’t be.” Once she was out of sight I looked back over at Nick. “I told her everything.” Nick finally said. “I know, I heard.” “You’re not mad that I told her how I felt?” “No of course not. I told you to tell her. I’m glad she now knows how you feel.” I started as I looked over at the door. “I could tell she feels the same about you.” “You’re not feeling guilty about all this are you?” Nick asked. I stood there ran my hands through my hair thinking. “You’re not having second thoughts about asking her are you?” “After what you just said to her I am.” “Don’t stop from asking her just because of me. I’m not going to step in your way. I just want the both of you happy. I could never give her what the both of you have.” I looked at him confused. “What’s that?” “You have each other, and a beautiful baby.” “Speaking of baby we should head up. I need to be there with her.” “Yeah you do.” Nick said as we started for the elevator.

Once in the delivery room, I got myself ready in the scrubs and stood my her head. “Hey baby.” I said as I brushed the hair from her face. “You made it.” She said as a single tear fell down her cheek. “I would never miss the chance to see the birth of my daughter being born.” I said wiping the tear away. “Where are the guys?” “I know Kevin and Nick are both in the waiting room, but I don’t know about Brian or Howie.” I said. “I’m just glad that you’re here. Right now that’s all that matters to me.” She said. As we were talking our daughter was born. Then Allison started having trouble breathing. “Baby?” I asked concerned. “Sir you’re going to have to step back now so we can do our job.” The doctor said. “But I promised her I wouldn’t leave her side.” I said. “I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to break this promise.” I looked at the doctor and started to clinch my fists. Then I heard the baby cry. “I love you baby girl.” I whispered to her before I stepped back and left the room.

I didn’t want to leave her side because I had promised her that I wouldn’t. So I stood by the window and tried to watch what they were doing. I couldn’t see much. While standing there I started hearing lots of loud sounds coming from the room and them I heard it. The one sound you always dread hearing. The long beep sound. I just broke down and cried into my hands. Kevin walked over to me and pulled me into a hug. I couldn’t take it anymore; I just started waling my fists on him. I couldn’t believe I just lost the love of my life. My life as I knew it was now over. I pushed away from him and ran to the elevator as fast as I could. I then headed through the lobby and out the front doors. I ran through the parking lot up to the top of the parking structure. When I got to the top I just stood there and cried. I cried like I’d never cried before.

I had been pacing the top ledge of the structure for hours when I finally walked over to the ledge and jumped up on it. Then I pulled out a cigarette and lit it. I just sat there watching the people down below me going bout there everyday business. Some in suits, scrubs, hospital gowns. Some were coming to visit loved ones. I couldn’t stand being alone without her. I was starting to go crazy until I someone spoke. “Think about your daughter and the woman you love.” The man said in a southern voice. “How am I supposed to raise a little girl with out her mother?” I said placing my hands on the wall. “You haven’t lost anyone.” He said placing his hand on my shoulder. I turned to look at him. “What are you talking about Kev? I heard them. They said the time of death.” “You’re right, they did. But she’s back and now she’s in Recovery. She’s been there for the past eight hours. Dr. Livingston has been looking for you to tell you and to tell you that you can see your baby girl.” Kevin said. I turned all the way around. “The surgery?” “Everything is back to normal. She hasn’t had any problems.” “I can’t go in there smelling like cigarettes.” “You should be fine. Nick and Aaron had been out for a smoke quite a bit and she hasn’t had any side affects to the smell.” I took a deep breath before jumping back down. I gave him a small grin and we walked back in.

Back on the Labor and Delivery floor I headed to the nurses station to see my daughter. “Can I help you?” A nurse asked. “Yeah, I’m here to see my daughter.” I said. “The name?” Her’s or mine?” I asked. “The baby’s.” “Well um, we haven’t named her yet because my girlfriend went right to surgery after she was born. So Baby McLean?” “Okay, right now she is in the nursery with her grandmother. Just go down the hall and make a left you can’t miss the baby window.” The nurse said. “Thank you.” I said heading down the hall. Once I got there I saw mom holding her. When she saw me she placed her down and came out to see me. “Would you like to see her?” Mom asked. I looked over and saw Nick standing alone looking at the baby’s. “Yeah, just give me a sec.” “Okay take your time.” She said going back into the room. I walked over to Nick and placed my hand on his arm. “You okay?” I asked him. “I’m doing much better now that I know that she’s going to be around.” Nick said with a smile. “So what are you going to name her?” “I decided to call her Yanni.” Nick turned and looked at me odd. “What does it mean?” “It means gift of God.” I said smiling. “That’s a perfect name for her.” Kevin said walking over. “She is a gift from God.” Brian added smiling. “Allison will love her name.” Howie said. “I know she will.” I said.