I was feeling devastated. More than I was yesterday. I lost her, and I knew I could not get her back. Without her I was nothing.
I lived day by day with the hopes to find her, and tell me everything is going to be ok. That she would forgive me for all the mistakes that I've done, and above all, let her know that I loved her more than she could ever imagine.

I was on my thirty-one birthday. I wasn't feeling old. On the contrary, I was feeling young, and it was strange.

There were all my friends. They organized my birthday party themselves. They paid for everything.
"Just enjoy," told me A.J. a few days before.
My friends tried to cheer me up, a strategy that always failed.
It felt strange not see her at nights, or see her beautiful eyes in the morning.

"Happy birthday," my mother told me, giving me a little red box with gold decorations, suprising me.

"Mom, it's so good you could come," I answer giving her one of the best smiles I had, taking the gift and putting on a table, hiding the pain I felt inside.

"Of course I came, it is my son's birthday." She replied giving me a hug, and rubbing my back.

I knew my mother noticed that something was wrong in me, that I wasn't the same as always. She also knew about my break up with Kate, but I never wanted to talk about it.

"Son, you think I'm not aware that you are feeling sad? I know you, I'm your mother... And I know when something's wrong with my son," she smile and put one of her hands on my cheek.

"I'm fine, really," I lied, "I can move on, I can feel it," I lied, again. I didn't want to ruin her day, and less on my birthday. I took her hand that had touched my face and kissed her.

"I don't want to pressure you, when you feel you can talk to me, just do it. I'm here for you, son," I love it when she says to me son. I was happy to have a mother so understanding. She was like a friend.

"Thank you, mom," I answer smiling. "I love you," and I hug her again.
She turned around to prepare a few birthday things, but before going away, she stopped.

"By the way, I have another gift, but I will give it to you later. I know you will like it," she smiled, and went into the kitchen.

What I hated the most, was waiting. I was very impatient. I wanted to know what else she had for me, but I decided to wait. I decided to go with the guys, they had organized everything after all.

"Guys! How are you tonight?" I asked them when I was on their table. All the guys were there: Kevin, Brian, A.J. and Howie. They looked pretty well dressed.

"We have to ask you that question, not you," said Howie, making everybody laugh.

"Okay... The truth? I'm good," I answer pretty honest, if I said excelent, I'd lied... Again.

The guys looked at each other, they knew what happened to me. They decided not to stand the matter, otherwise I would feel worse.

"Thanks for organizing my birthday guys," I stared at the four of them, smiling.

"We had to do it, and above all, we wanted to do it." Said Brian, taking a sip from his beer. "After all, you are the kid from the group." A.J. said and they all laugh, except me.

I just laughed sarcastically. I loved this guys, I had shared almost half of my life with them. I grew up with them, they taught me a lot of things. I spent a beautiful night, with all my family and friends, laughing, drinking, and trying to forget everything bad that had happened.

In the dawn, the people who had came to my party were gone, only a few were left, there were only the closest friends.

I couldn't take out Kate of my mind. She wasn't another woman in my life, she was the one. And I let her go like a fool. I knew I would regret my entire life for it.

The others were in the dining room, sitting on the couch, enjoying the last part of the party.
I decided to get out of there for a while, to the balcony, just to think about how to continue my life without the person I loved the most.

"Happy birthday." I heard a voice, sweet and delicate, that I always wanted to hear.

And there she was, perfect as always. With her wavy black hair in the wind, her beautiful black eyes and a beige dress up to her knees.
Just looking at her I felt complete. The light that was outside made her even more beautiful.

"Kate... What are you doing here?" I asked suprise, not knowing what she was doing, after all I did to her.

"I thought..." I was interrupted by a sweet kiss, the kiss that I missed.
We locked eyes, I couldn't stop doing it. I missed that beautiful glow on them.

"I can not leave you behind, Nick. It's impossible stop loving you. I realized that I needed you for the rest of my life after leaving you..." Her voice was trembling, and she played with his fingers, as she looked in my eyes. "I love you, and I can't beat that feeling."

In that moment, I didn't know what to say, I was suprised.
"I... I want to apologize for everything bad I've done," I said staring her, being honest.

"I know, Nick," she said taking my hand on hers, I felt a kind of electricity with her contact. "It was my fault..."

"Of course not," I interrupted her. "It was for the both of us, you don't have to carry such a weight on your shoulders." I answered, we had both made the mistake for separating after all.

She was silent for a few minutes, I was silence too. I didn't know what else to say, I wasn't expecting such a visit from her.

There wasn't progress for the two of us to start the conversation, so I approached her slowly, looking into her eyes. Being close to her lips, I get more closer. I started the passionate kiss, to which Kate replied in the same way, kissing like there was no tomorrow. I was in love.

I moved away a few inches, I rested my forehead with hers, taking my hands to her cheeks, just enough to look into her eyes and tell her the words I most wanted to say.

"I love you," she smiled and I heard the words I wanted to hear. "I love you too." I hug her again not wanting to let her go.

Inside the house, I noticed a big smile on my mom's face. She had planned everything.
I answered with a smile, murmuring, "Thank you," while she was still smiling, she knew I was now happy.

Kate was the best birthday present I could ever ask, and I knew I couldn't lose her, never again.