This handbook is specially written for those who are scared of ever becoming an ONLPF (Obsessed No Life Psycho Fan) and would like to stay sane. Or for those who just entered the Backstreet World (yes, there still are fans like those!) and have no idea how to become sane (and with that, stay sane).
Here a few rules. Yes, rules. If you want to become and stay a sane fan, you have to obey these rules.
Chapter 5 by catseye1769
written by catseye1769
HOW DO I BECOME AND STAY A SANE BSB FAN?
Written By Catseye1769
One of the most important things you will do as a BSB fan will be online communication with other BSB fans. You will probably make some lifelong friends as you have so many things in common. Mainly a love of a wonderful bunch of musicians. (and if you don’t think they are actual musicians then stop reading now, kiss my ass, and go listen to N’Stink) You may also attempt to communicate with BSB through email from their website or Twitter. There are several good and not so good ways to go about this. Most of which I will cover here.
1.3 Online Communication (or attempted) with BSB and Other BSB Fans
1. Once you become a BSB fan you will develop sleuthing skills that will rival the CIA, FBI and MI6 combined. You may discover old or new phone numbers, past hookups on Twitter, message boards. You may on occasion tweet them and if you are extremely lucky you may get a tweet back. Once in awhile sending a tweet is fine but please for all that you hold dear do not continuously fill up our timelines with 97 tweets in a row because you want a birthday shout out. All you will do is succeed in pissing people off and 1 or 2 things will happen. 1. You will get blocked 2. You will get unfollowed.
2. I do not care how many old hookups (one night stands, hump & dumps, encounters) you find online, following them WILL NOT get you any closer to BSB. It will make your sad, sorry ass look like the pathetic loser you are.
3. As you have by now figured out twitter is the main form of communication between BSB fans which can be a good thing most of the time. However there are some that have not figured out that spending hours online looking up their family, best friends and girlfriends/wives/fiancÚs then following (read stalking) them will not get you closer to them. You will once again look like the pathetic loser you are.
4. Some of the ladies you will meet on twitter are wonderful authors of some fantastic fiction and I encourage you to read and review. However if you take it to mean that they are actually talking about really people (with the exception of BSB) and leave them nasty reviews then you are a retarded bitch who needs to go back to your cave along with that tall brunette ho from Europe.
5. This may be the worst offense of them all hypocrisy. If you get pissed off at other fans that attempt to see/talk to or meet BSB then you do the same you become a hypocritical bitch. (if you take offense at this them you are obviously are one)
6. This next one is a personal pet peeve of mine and I do not give a damn who doesn’t like it. If you sign up to play an online game with any member of BSB then start tweeting or emailing like you are intimate friends allow me to let you in on a secret. You are in no way friends with them. All you are is a pathetic idiot. They do not care who you are or what your name is. All they care about is playing the game. Period. So following their friends, tweeting their girlfriends, tweeting them to call you once again makes you look like a pathetic idiot and if it brings you to their attention trust me on this it will not be in a good way. Can we say restraining order. Play the game and be happy.
7. On occasion BSB plans fan events which any and all are welcome to attend although you may have to join their fan club to purchase tickets. These will range from acoustic shows to cruises. And from what I hear they can be extremely fun and a fantastic way to meet your favorite Backstreet Boy. However if you are unable to attend then proceed to whine and bitch all over twitter and your website about how you are sick and tired of hearing about them then do a complete 360 and decide to go you become a hypocritical bitch. I can certainly see not being able to go because of the money issues and that is fine. However do not pitch a fit and call other fans cunts because they can go. Because if you do that then decide to attend the same event then you become a hypocritical cunt yourself.
8. Many of the ladies (and a few men) you will meet have a particular thing for a certain Backstreet Boy. I say to each their own. They will talk constantly about said boy. Again to each their own. But when you go on and on in the same manner then proceed to bitch because other people do the same thing you again become a hypocritical bitch. This goes along with bitching because certain people tweet their favorite guy and actually get a tweet back. Good for them. Why you would complain when you have done the same thing is beyond me.
9. If you follow a certain Backstreet Boy and for some reason he blocks you then take a hint. It was not an accident. He does not want anything to do with you and constantly tweeting his wife and friends to ask him to unblock you won’t work. Take the hint and go back to your rubber room.
10. BSB have been known to send shout outs, birthday greetings and occasionally a signed picture. But if any of you think that by constantly bugging them you will get one. WRONG!! They are very busy and hardly have time for themselves let alone people that constantly bug them.
11. One last thing. Please for every fan out there if you are fortunate enough to run into any one of the guys when they are eating have mercy and leave them be. No one I repeat no one likes to be bothered when they are eating. Especially them. You will run into their security and from what I have heard they are not to be messed with.
This is all for now. Please read and if you see yourself in here well then you have a few things to change. And if you see yourself and get mad too damn bad. The truth hurt. Deal with it.
12. Hi Michelle. =)
Reiviews and comments are always welcome.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.