Chapter 1


"You still won't tell me where we are going, Nickolas Gene?" Amanda teased when she and Nick got to the airport that night to catch their flight. Nick simply smiled and kissed her.

"Nope." he replied. The two of them walked through the terminal without much difficulty, it was very quiet. They had something to eat and boarded their plane. Nick had gotten a red eye flight and the first class was deserted except for the two of them. The flight itself was pretty uneventful until Amanda caught Nick looking at her seductively from his seat next to her.

"I want you so bad right now." he whispered huskily into her ear, making her heart race.

"Nick-"

"Meet me in the bathroom." he added before taking off down the aisle without so much as a backwards glance. Amanda watched him go, her mouth hanging open as she sat in her seat. Should she follow? She thought about not going at all then reasoned she was insane for leaving Nick Carter waiting in the bathroom. She made her way casually down the aisle towards the bathroom, acting like she wasn't on her way to have sex.

"Nick?" she whispered once she was by the bathroom doors.

"Shhh...." he said urgently, pulling her towards the last bathroom. The room was tiny and cramped but Nick had already dropped his pants, they laid on the floor near his feet. Amanda didn't have time to speak, his lips had engulfed hers....

"What has gotten into you?" Amanda asked when he started sucking on her neck. He was more aggressive than she was used to. Nick moved her skirt up with his hand and kissed her passionately.

"I need you," he told her before she felt him inside her. Amanda fought off the urge to cry out....she didn't want the whole plane alerted to the fact they were having sex. Nick thought he was crazy as he thrusted into her again and again, beads of sweat forming on his face. When all was said and done they went back to their seats separately, the plane staff oblivious. Amanda fell asleep with her head on Nick's shoulder for what felt like hours before she heard the announcement the plane was landing.

"Put these on." Nick urged, pushing a pair of headphones into her hand. Amanda looked confused but did it anyway. Nick smiled as the announcement continued, he didn't want her to find out where they were going until they got into the airport. Once their flight had finished and landed safely, Nick led her inside.

"Nick....where are we?" Amanda asked, noticing the signs overhead were in french.

"I think you know already, baby." he said when they reached the luggage pickup. Amanda's mouth dropped open....she was in France.

"Paris? You took me to Paris?!" she exclaimed as he laughed.

"Qui, mademoiselle." Nick said.

"What?"

"I said, yes....we are in Paris." Nick replied, smiling. The two of them rode in a limo to their hotel. Amanda looked out her window, the city was beautiful. She couldn't wait to see everything. Their hotel was an old French villa on a river....and their room one of the most expensive.

"Wait, baby." Nick said....before picking up his new wife and carrying her through the doorway. Amanda giggled and kissed him before he set her down to explore their suite. They had a private balcony overlooking the river to themselves and a view of the Eiffel Tower from afar.

"Can we have breakfast, baby? I'm starving." Amanda asked. When the plane had landed it was morning and now she could feel her stomach rumble thinking about french food.

"I know what I want for breakfast." Nick said as he walked over to her and picked her up.

"What?" Amanda asked, but Nick simply took her to the bed and laid her down, kissing her neck.

"You look so good right now." he whispered into her ear. Amanda looked at him in surprise.

"Again? But we just-"

"You're complaining?" Nick asked, raising an eyebrow and taking off his shirt, tossing it aside. Amanda shook her head at him as his lips touched hers again, his hands undressing her in the middle of their hotel in Paris. She had never expected any of this...it was a dream come true. It was as if when the wedding ring was placed on her husband's finger....he had turned into a sexual beast.

"You ready for me?" Nick whispered seductively, climbing on top of her as she moaned with pleasure again.

"I am always ready for you." Amanda smiled when he entered her once more. He grinded slowly without faltering, his hands moving over her bare skin as they climaxed. They lay in bed together afterwards....their honeymoon had definitely started with a bang.

Chapter 2

Nick woke up later that afternoon...laying next to Amanda, his new wife.



Wife...



"No!!!!" he screamed, watching her fall in front of him...blood spattering his clothes. Her body lay in front of him and he felt tears burn his cheeks as he looked at her.

"Nick....I'm so sorry..."

"Please don't leave me," he begged, sobbing as he held her. Blood covered his hands, there was nothing he could do to stop it.
"I love y-" she whispered, but her eyes closed...



Nick got out of the bed and walked out onto the balcony, looking at the sun setting as he wiped his eyes. Today would have been the day after their second anniversary. He wondered what it would have been like if Tracy had not died that day in Aruba. He knew that they would not have had any children. Truthfully, Nick doubted they would have lasted this long at all after the conversation he had with her on the cruise the night before it all happened.....





"Why don't you and Amanda get along like you used to?" he had asked her after they made love for the first time.

"I thought she was in love with you and wanted to take you away from me." she answered.

"Tracy, I am gonna be honest with you. Amanda and I have a history. I have feelings for her..."

"Baby, I know. Lance told me everything."

"He what?" Nick asked in surprise.
"Lance told me you were going to propose to her when you came back from Japan. He told me you lost your virginity to her. When I found that ring around your neck I got scared." she explained, her hand on his cheek as she tried to make him understand. Nick nodded silently, frowning.

"You did all that because you were afraid of losing me?" he whispered.

"She's my best friend, Nick....but I am in love with you. The last thing I wanted was to be left heartbroken. I am so sorry." she said, kissing him gently.

"Baby, you need to talk to her. This doesn't change how I feel. I do love you but I won't get between you and her." Nick replied. Tracy nodded and kissed him again as Nick returned it.

"I will talk to her when we get back." she said, smiling.


She had never gotten that chance. Nick sat on the balcony for a long time, just staring at the sunset and feeling his eyes water at the memory of her, feeling as if he had hurt her by marrying Amanda.

"Until death do us part..." he whispered, looking at the gold wedding band on his hand and sighing as the tears began to fall.


Amanda woke up some time later and was concerned when she saw the bed empty. Nick had vanished from the room and she didn't like how quiet it was. A soft noise floated into the room, coming from the balcony.

"Nicky?" she called, walking towards the door. She stopped when she heard him sobbing, his head buried in his hands. Amanda felt horrible, she wondered what she had done to upset him. Leaving him alone, she went to the phone to call home and check on the children.


"Carter Residence, this is Brian Littrell."

"Bri, what are you doing at the house?" Amanda asked, laughing at how even when he was off duty, Brian still sounded like a police officer.

"AJ had to go down to the store for a few while Celine is napping so I am just watching things. Aaron is doing his homework." he explained.

"So everything is okay?"

"Of course it is. How do you like France?" Brian laughed.

"Oh, its wonderful but I am worried about Nick....he's out on the balcony crying." Amanda told him with a sigh.

"Don't you know what today is?"

"Should I?"

"She died two years ago today....He wanted to change the wedding to next week, don't you remember?" Brian explained. Amanda's face fell and she felt horrible. Tracy had been murdered on this day, how could she have been so insensitive?

"I am a horrible person....no wonder he is upset." she whispered.

"No, you're not. Amanda, it was an easy mistake to make. I'm sure he will be fine, just talk to him." Brian replied. Amanda got off of the phone and walked out onto the balcony where Nick was, placing a hand on his shoulder and rubbing his back gently.

"I am so sorry, sweetheart. I should have respected your wishes." she said. Nick wiped his eyes and looked up at her, his eyes red and worn.

"It isn't your fault, baby. I didn't want to ruin our honeymoon, I am sorry." Nick apologized. He stood up and she put her arms around him, rubbing his back for comfort.
"I am the worst friend, Tracy's death.....I should have remembered, Nick. Even though she was awful to me she was still my friend."

"Baby, let me tell you something. She was going to talk to you when we got back from the cruise, I told her it wasn't right of her to be so nasty to you because of how I felt about you. She knew I loved you." Nick told her, his eyes welling up again.

"She did?" Amanda asked in surprise. She moved to wipe a tear from his cheek as he nodded, sniffling.

"Tracy told me that Lance had twisted her mind to think you were stealing me from her, he told her I wasn't a virgin and we had history."

"That bastard. Nick, I should have listened that day when you told me it was a bad idea to marry her. If you hadn't....she would still be alive." Amanda told him as he held her.

"Baby, you and I are supposed to be together. Tracy's death made me realize I still loved you, and if it wasn't for that happening Celine wouldn't have been born." Nick pointed out.

"You're right. I wouldn't want Celine not to be in our lives. It was the best thing to happen to us. Nick, if you're not ready we can go home and have our honeymoon another time." she offered. Nick shook his head, his blonde hair falling in his eyes as he smiled.

"Let's just take it easy tonight baby. We can have fun tomorrow." he whispered, kissing her. Amanda and Nick walked back into their hotel room hand in hand, not wanting to change their past for anything.

Chapter 3


For the rest of the night Amanda and Nick lay in bed next to one another, talking. They had ordered room service and just kept to the room.

"Remember when I was very sick with the flu a few months back?" Nick asked. Amanda nodded, Nick had come down with a horrible flu bug and a very high fever on top of it.

"Yes, I remember. I stayed up all night taking care of you." Amanda said.

"I saw Tracy before I woke up and she spoke to me. She asked me if I wanted to come back or stay with her there." Nick replied. Amanda thought about this. If Nick had chosen to stay with her, she knew Nick would have died from his fever.

"What did you say?" Amanda whispered, her hand on his cheek as she looked into his deep blue eyes.

"I couldn't answer. When she saw how conflicted I was, she said it wasn't fair to make me choose and that I belonged with you. Tracy saw what was in my heart, she knew I wanted to be with you." Nick explained, smiling with tears in his eyes.

"Oh...Nick..." she said, kissing him.

"That's when I decided to ask you to marry me....but I wanted to do it right so I met your parents first." he said. He and Amanda talked all night and fell asleep around three that morning. The next day Nick had arranged a limo to drive the two of them around Paris. They had a wonderful afternoon of sightseeing and lunch in a cafe...Nick had something special planned for that night.


"nous emmener � la Tour Eiffel." he said to their limo driver. Amanda looked at Nick curiously....she had forgotten he was able to speak French. A memory of a 15 year old Nick surfaced, his blonde bangs in his face as he studied a french lesson book.




"French?"

"Qui, Mademoiselle." he said with a cheeky grin.

"I don't know what that means."

Nick simply smiled at her in her cheerleading uniform.

"Tu es belle."




Amanda smiled and watched Nick talking to the limo driver.

"Nick? Can I ask you something?" she said when the limo began to pull away from the hotel.

"You just did." Nick teased as she playfully hit him in the arm.

"What did you say to me that day in the cafeteria? You spoke to me in French." Amanda asked. Nick closed his eyes and smiled, remembering high school and his crush on her, not being able to tell her how he felt.

"Tu es Belle....." he said softly, looking at her.

"What does that mean, Nick?"

"It means you're beautiful." he told her, his cheeks turning pink slightly. Amanda's face softened and she smiled.

"Why didn't you tell me that? I would have loved it. You speak French so well." she said as he looked on in surprise. Nick could have kicked his teenage self, he should have told Amanda years ago that he liked her.

"I was so shy then, you were dating Lance and I didn't think I had a shot with you, honestly." Nick explained.

"You always had a shot with me, Nicky. I liked you a lot more than I let on.....that's why I chose you to be my first on prom night. You just didn't seem like you were ready for a relationship then, but when you dated Tracy I saw otherwise. You're a great guy and I am lucky to have someone like you." Amanda said, leaning in to kiss him. They kissed for a while until the limo reached their destination.

"Oh, Nick....its beautiful." she whispered as the Eiffel Tower stood in front of them. It was now dark and the tower was lit up with thousands of lights.

"I should teach you some French," Nick said as they sat down for dinner at a cafe near the tower.

"Like what?" Amanda asked.

"Repeat after me....embrasse-moi." he whispered, leaning close to her.

"Embrasse-moi....what does that mean?"

"Kiss me."

"Clever. I can say one thing in French, but it isn't Merci or anything like that." Amanda whispered, smiling at him. Nick raised an eyebrow and she laughed.

"Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?"

"Everybody knows that one, baby." Nick teased, rolling his eyes as she giggled.

"So will you?"

"Of course." Nick said before kissing her again. They ate dinner and took a walk together, hand in hand before heading back to the hotel once more. Nick undressed while Amanda watched from the bed, grinning. He climbed on top and went to work immediately, his lips traveling from her neck to her bare chest and stomach, butterfly kisses on her shoulders before he entered her once more. They had yet another night of love making....all the while Amanda thought about what Nick wanted more than anything....a son. She smiled as Nick's hand grazed her thigh, if they were going to make another baby....this was the perfect chance to do it.

Chapter 4


"Howie, come on!!! I am on my damn honeymoon!"

Amanda heard Nick shouting from the other room after she had taken her shower the next day. The two of them were supposed to be seeing the rest of the sights that afternoon.

"Nick?" she called from the doorway as he got off the phone. He looked angry but calmed down a bit when he saw his wife.

"Hey, you." he said, running a hand through his hair.

"Why were you yelling at your manager?" Amanda asked with a small laugh. Nick had hired Howie as his manager a few months ago, and the two of them often got along. However, by the sounds of things...Nick was in disagreement.

"He scheduled work for me during our vacation." Nick sighed, waiting for her to react. Initially Amanda was a little peeved, but she then realized that Nick hardly went overseas.

"What kind of work is it? An appearance? Promo?" she asked, sitting across from him.

"A photo shoot for a magazine and a few interviews. Should take up most of this morning and afternoon, I'm sorry." he replied.

"You're being all pissy over that? Nick, you hardly come overseas and your fans want to see you. I'm sorry but I agree with Howie this time." Amanda laughed. Nick sat in silence for a few moments, thinking. He didn't want to leave Amanda alone in Paris...he was afraid if he wasn't near her something would happen to her.

"I guess you're right, baby. I will call him back. This is my first time to Paris and I don't want to let the fans down." he said, taking out his phone to call Howie. He went to the photo shoot but was nervous the whole time, checking his phone every so often.

"Are you thinking about your wife, Nick?" Howie asked when he saw Nick pacing.

"We are in a country where she doesn't know anybody....I am not with her. Howie, you know what happened with my first wife. I can't lose her. Why do you think I gave you so much shit for this?" Nick explained as his stylist tried again to dress him.

"I understand your loss, but this is important. Your fans overseas don't see you often....it's been about 5 years or more since you have traveled out of America. I arranged for a undercover bodyguard to watch Amanda, she won't know she is there." Howie said, putting a hand on Nick's shoulder.

"Thanks, Howie. I just want her to be safe." Nick said with a smile. He went back to the photo shoot and when he was done, Nick rushed back to the hotel room to make a surprise for Amanda.


"Nicky, are you here?" Amanda called when she got to the room a while later. The room was dark but filled with candlelight, reminding her of their first date. Nick was waiting for her by the balcony holding a rose, smiling at her.

"Wow, you look good." Amanda commented as she saw the dark suit he wore. Nick always looked best dressed up, his hair slicked back slightly and wearing the cologne she loved on him.

"Join me for dinner....on the balcony?" he asked, holding out the rose for her.

"I feel under dressed for the occasion." she blushed. She wore worn jeans and an old t shirt, her brown hair in a messy ponytail. Nick laughed and kissed her hand.
"There's something for you in the bedroom to wear."

Amanda walked into the room to find a dark blue dress laid out on the bed along with shoes. It fit her perfectly and hugged her body in the right places....she put the dress on and applied some makeup before coming back outside. Nick had set up a candlelight dinner out on the balcony under the stars....the Eiffel Tower in the distance behind them.

"This is wonderful, Nick. I wish we could just live here. Your fans were so kind to me today....and its beautiful out here." Amanda said as they ate.

"We can't move out here. What about the club and everything back home?" Nick answered. Amanda didn't say anything for some time, the two of them eating in silence. Nick could tell she was troubled but left it alone for now. It was a beautiful night and he wanted to make the best of it.

"I got a surprise for you for dessert." Amanda said after they had finished eating. Nick grinned, he could always count on her to know just what he liked.

"What's that?" he asked.

"I went shopping today and I want you to see what I got for you. Wait out here until I call you." Amanda said coyly, before disappearing into the bedroom. Nick watched the door for quite some time before he heard her call his name.

"Amanda?" he said, walking towards the door. His eyes went wide when he saw Amanda in the satin and lace lingerie. Her breasts were pushed up and all Nick could do was stare.

"I knew you would like this, Nicky." she cooed seductively, pulling him towards her by his necktie. Nick felt his blood rise and couldn't hold back any longer. He pounced on top of her, his lips all over her....wherever he could reach. They went for a few hours before they lay naked next to one another in bed, Nick's heavy breathing piercing the silence.

"Not that I'm complaining....but what's gotten into you?" Amanda asked with a chuckle as she moved his hair out of his face.

"What do you mean?"

"Baby, we have never fucked like that before. You have so much energy lately, you wore me out." Amanda whispered.

"Did I? I could go again actually." Nick smiled, kissing her gently on the forehead.

"Nick, you never used to be like this before we started dating. Why the change?" Amanda asked. Nick stopped kissing her and sat up in the bed, thinking.

"In the past when you and I hooked up, one of us was always taken and we had to sneak around to have fun. We never planned anything....it just happened. Now that I'm married to you....well nothing turns me on more than knowing you are all mine. I don't have that fear of waking up and you being gone." he explained. Amanda smiled at him....she liked that Nick could always keep her guessing. As they fell asleep together....Amanda thought about her daughter back home....being here in France with Nick was fun but she couldn't wait to see her again. She knew being married to Nick was going to be an adventure.

Chapter 5


After their honeymoon ended, Amanda went back to work at her night club and Nick went to work on his new album....he was still recording a bit and thinking about album titles. For a few weeks everything was normal until Amanda started to feel sick. It started like the flu....she felt nauseous in the morning and most of the early afternoon.

"Are you okay?" AJ asked as he set the baby down in her playpen in front of the TV and put on Sesame Street for her to watch. He sat down on the couch and watched Celine play with a stuffed animal Nick had given her.

"What do you mean, AJ?" Amanda asked, holding her sour stomach. She hated feeling like this and somewhat knew what it was...but didn't want to tell anyone until she was sure. Amanda was surprised it had happened so quickly....she knew she had promised Nick a son, but wasn't expecting it right now.

"You've been getting sick a lot lately, maybe you should see a doctor?" AJ suggested.

"I don't need to, I am fine." Amanda repeated as the bile rose in her throat. She didn't like mourning sickness, she already knew that it wasn't the flu. AJ raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

"You're full of....well, you know....." he said, his eyes falling on the baby as he remembered Nick and Amanda didn't allow cursing in front of the kids.

"I'm not going." she protested as she sat down on the couch near her daughter, smiling while she watched her play. Celine was almost two, she was growing up fast. Celine had her father's golden hair and his smile....but her mother's personality. She could sense something was going on even though she was too young to understand. Amanda looked up to see AJ dialing on his cell phone.

"Who are you calling?" she asked.

"I am gonna call Nick and see what he thinks. He doesn't know you're sick, does he?" AJ retorted, his eyes showing disapproval. Amanda looked away, she knew she shouldn't keep secrets but also knew AJ had a bad habit of blabbing.

"Fine, I will go to the stupid doctor if it will make you feel better." Amanda sighed. She packed up the baby and AJ took her to the doctor's office around noon. After the nurse took some blood and urine the doctor talked to her alone.

"Mrs Carter....you mentioned you have been feeling sick but only in the morning. When was the last time you had intercourse?" the doctor asked. Amanda's face fell....she had a feeling that she was pregnant but went along with the discussion.

"A few weeks ago on my honeymoon. Do you think I am pregnant?" she asked.

"I don't think, Mrs. Carter. I know. Congratulations. You are a few weeks along already." the doctor explained. Amanda left the office in silence.....thinking back before she and Nick had gotten married. Amanda had told him she didn't want any more children but changed her mind when she knew how much having a son meant to Nick....how he wanted to give him what he never had as a child. She just needed to think about how to tell him.

"Well, what did the doctor say?" AJ asked when they met in the waiting room where he sat with Celine.

"I am perfectly healthy." Amanda replied, taking the baby from him and walking outside.

"Come on, Amanda. I am worried about you....are you pregnant?" AJ asked. He was around for her pregnancy with Celine, how could he not have noticed before? The two of them went back to the house, AJ trying to get her to tell him what was going on.

"I don't know what you're talking about." she said with a wink. AJ took that to mean he was right and to stop pressing the issue.

"Okay, so when are you going to tell him then?"

"When the time is right." Amanda replied with a smile. That night after dinner, Nick came home late from doing a photo shoot for a magazine in Orlando. He was tired and a bit stressed so Amanda wasn't surprised when he popped open a beer.

"Rough day?" Amanda asked. Nick didn't drink much since his darker days a few months ago. He tried to stay away but every so often he and Amanda shared a drink together.

"Yeah....Howie is all over my ass about this album. I hope everything goes well, I have been working so hard since the car accident to get myself back in line." Nick replied, kissing her gently.

"I know you have and I am proud of you, you came a long way."

"Here, I got you one. Join me?" Nick asked wearily, holding out the beer bottle for her.

"No, thanks." she said. Nick looked at her and she saw his eyes fall to her stomach, where her hand was resting. She knew she wasn't showing yet but she knew what Nick was thinking.

"Are you?" Nick asked.

"Am I what, Nick?" she smiled. Nick's eyes went wide and the beer bottle fell to the floor, breaking on impact as the amber liquid seeped onto the carpet.

"Baby, that's wonderful!" he said as he came over to kiss her.

"You're making a mess..." she teased.

"I'm so happy....this is gonna be great. I will be with you every step of the way....it won't be like last time. I am ready this time." Nick gushed as he held her.

"What do you mean, like last time? Nick....you gave Celine up...."

"I meant that I will take care of you and be here for you and the baby. Like a dad should do." Nick replied. Even though he had gotten his rights to his daughter, Nick regretted every day putting Lance's name on the birth certificate. He wished he could go back and change it....but it was in the past now. He didn't want to be like his father. Nick was ready this time, he just hoped Amanda was ready as well.

Chapter 6

Now that Nick knew he was about to become a dad for the second time, he started to worry....he wasn't there for Amanda's pregnancy with Celine. He had been afraid at the time....afraid he wouldn't be a good father.


"Lance...you were around when Amanda was pregnant. Am I in over my head?" Nick asked when Lance had come over to the house. Since the two of them had put aside their differences, Nick realized Lance was actually a nice guy to hang out with.

"You're gonna have a fun time when the mood swings kick in. She wouldn't let me touch her for most of the pregnancy. Pregnant women get emotional, you gotta be very careful what you say." Lance warned with a laugh.

"Mood swings?"

"She used to cry over the littlest thing. You'll be fine, just take care of her like you do now. Every pregnancy is different." Lance said. Just to be prepared, Nick got a book on pregnancy and read it, he wanted to make sure he did everything right.



Over the next week or so, Amanda began to feel her hormones start to control her. She also noticed a change in Nick's wardrobe...he started to wear tighter clothes and not the baggy, loose fitting ones anymore. He worked out more....ate healthier. It was a good change but everything he did just made him sexier.


"Carter is late again." Skye, Nick's drummer teased. Amanda didn't mind Nick being late to rehearsal but he had been making a habit of it again. Nick finally showed up and Amanda was getting ready to say something when she noticed what he wore. Nick had on tight jeans that accented certain areas....and a white tank top that hugged his muscles. She wanted him then and there but there was business to attend to first. She waited until Nick rehearsed....his voice was on point that day and it did nothing but turn her on more.

"Nick....I need to see you in my office." Amanda called sternly. Nick laughed off the catcalls from his band and went up the stairs to Amanda's office, his hands in his pockets as she followed.

"Look, I am sorry I was la-" Nick started, but his words were cut off by the door locking behind them. Nick was claustrophobic and his heart began to race.

"You have been a bad boy, Nick." Amanda whispered, walking towards him.

"What are you doing?"

"You have been late a lot this week....and I think you need to be punished." she said huskily as she moved towards the desk. In a fluid motion, Amanda knocked everything off of the desk and onto the floor....papers flying all around them. Nick was confused until Amanda grabbed him by the shirt and threw him down onto the desk, kissing him. Her mouth engulfed his until he needed to catch breath.

"Amanda, I-" Nick said, but she turned him over and spanked him. At first Nick's reaction was to tell her to stop....but he was turned on. The way she hit him was more sensual than to punish. Nick kissed her, his tounge dancing with hers as they undressed and made love right on the desk in his wife's office. After they finished, Nick got dressed and ran a hand through his hair.

"If that's punishment....I will be late every day." he laughed.

"Now go out there and act like I yelled at you." Amanda instructed, patting him on the ass as he left the office. Nick walked downstairs through the empty club towards his band...a look of defeat on his face as he moved towards the door.

"Why do you put up with him, Amanda? He's always late or doing something stupid." Skye commented after Nick left.

"There is a method to my madness." Amanda smirked, feeling satisfied as she watched her husband leave.

"That would be?" Skye asked, fixing her blonde hair.

"The sex is amazing."




Nick came back to the club for his gig that night wearing the same jeans but a button up powder blue shirt had replaced the tank top. His energy was up, and Amanda noticed that he was more interactive with his audience. Nick went into the crowd, serenading one of the fans during a slow song. The fans were talking and all Amanda could do was smile.

"I don't know what his wife is doing, but I like the new Nick. He seems happier and confident." one of them said as they stood by the bar during Nick's set. It didn't stop there....Nick almost killed his audience by unbuttoning his shirt...exposing his bare chest underneath to the delight of the crowd. Amanda was surprised, he usually didn't show off his body.

Later that night when they lay in bed together cuddling, Amanda decided to find out what had changed in her husband.

"Nick?"

"Yes?" Nick asked, kissing her gently on the forehead.

"I noticed you have been showing off a lot lately....not that I am complaining, because I love it...but you never used to." Amanda pointed out.

"My therapist and I talked about why I wear such baggy clothes or layers of clothes. I was hiding under them because I felt ashamed....I felt ugly, remember?" Nick explained.

"You're not-" Amanda started.

"I know I am not ugly, I just felt that I was. I used the clothes to make excuses....I used them because I was afraid to be hurt. My therapist told me I should stop hiding. I don't feel ugly anymore, Amanda." Nick said.

"I'm glad for that, baby." Amanda replied, nuzzling into his neck, his chin resting on her head.

"When do we find out the sex of the baby?" Nick asked, putting his arm around her and his other hand resting on her stomach.

"Not until I am about three months along, and besides....I think we should wait until the baby is born." Amanda said, although she had a feeling it would be the boy she and Nick both wanted.

"I like surprises anyway." Nick whispered as he kissed her again. Amanda smiled, putting her hand over Nick's as she thought about the baby forming inside of her...hoping it would turn out the way she and Nick wished it would.

Chapter 7




"I'm fat!" Amanda pouted as she looked in the mirror at her 5 month along baby belly. Nick came up behind her and put his arms around her, letting them rest on her stomach.

"You look beautiful." he whispered as he kissed her. Amanda still pouted, brushing him off and turning sideways. It looked like she had swallowed a basketball, her stomach protruded outward through her maternity nightgown.

"Nick, you're just saying that." she snapped. Nick walked away and went to take a hot shower, not responding anymore. He lathered up, washing his biceps as he let the steam surround his body. Nick thought about a lot during the shower....Amanda had developed an attitude over the last few months. Gone were the sex crazed nights under the covers....Amanda barely let him touch her these days. Nick didn't let it get him down, he had been keeping busy writing for his new album....recording demo tapes in his studio and making calls to producers, working with his manager on aspects of the album. He loved creating music...it was his passion and his craft. Nick strived to do the best he possibly could, it was always a part of him. That day was full of meetings with Howie and the record label. Nick wanted to go one way, the more personal route with his songs....yet the label wanted radio friendly ones. Nick avoided listening to the radio as much as he could, he disliked most of what was being played. It wasn't his style...he wanted to be himself. Nick walked into the night club about five minutes late to see Amanda glaring at him, her arms crossed and tapping her foot at him.

"Let's get started, guys." Nick said hurriedly, rushing to tune his guitar and begin playing. They went over a few songs before Amanda walked over looking pissed off.

"NICK, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU???" she screamed, her brown eyes burning with rage. Nick flinched and backed away slowly, almost tripping over his guitar case.

"I....uh...."

"Don't give me any of your tired ass excuses, you were late!"



Nick frowned at her....he had only been a few minutes late, what was the big deal?


"Amanda-" he started, but she cut him off again.

"SAVE IT! You fucking promised you wouldn't be late anymore! You're being a real shit head lately and there is NO EXCUSE for this. This is your FINAL warning. If you're late again, you're done." Amanda ranted, her face an inch from his as her husband's eyes began to water in shame.

"Yes, boss." he replied, not looking at her as he bent down to pick up his guitar case. The guys in his band were looking on in shock, even Skye looked remorseful. Nick sulked out of the club and went home, his head already pounding as he heard Amanda's voice echo in his head.

"You're a real shit head...."


Nick got home not long after, kicking off his shoes before grabbing a beer and taking it upstairs with him. He took off his jacket and tossed it aside, sipping from the beer bottle before he decided to run the bath water to relax and clear his head. His shirt and pants lay in a heap near the bathroom door, Nick submerged in the bathtub under the bubbles. Nick sighed with content, letting the steam relax him....he always preferred baths to showers.


"NICK!!!!"


His eyes opened lazily when he heard her in the bathroom, waving his pants in front of her.

"Why are your clothes laying all over the room?" Amanda shouted. Nick just stared at her....she usually never got angry at him. He assumed it was a mood swing so he just let her yell.

"Nick, you know better than this! I worked all day at the club and I come home to dirty clothes all over the floor. What the fuck is wrong with you?" she shouted.

"Baby, come on....this isn't like you." Nick said as he got up from the tub and put a towel around his waist before letting the water out.

"Get away from me, I'm disgusted with you right now!" Amanda snapped when he went to put his arms around her. She pushed him away and stormed out, slamming the door. Nick sat down on the bed, running a hand through his damp hair....wondering how he would get through the next four months. The next day Amanda seemed to have calmed down, but Nick was careful not to do anything to aggravate her. He did everything to make sure she was comfortable and happy.

"Baby?" she said suddenly as they watched television together in the living room. Celine was on the floor playing with blocks and giggling.

"Yes?"

"I'm hungry. Can you get me something?" she asked sweetly. Nick smiled and kissed her on the cheek before leaving the room. Making a snack was an easy task. Nick made a turkey salad sandwich and brought it to Amanda on a plate, along with a glass of milk and set it down in front of her. A few chews into the sandwich, Amanda made a face and pushed it away.

"What's wrong?" Nick asked. Amanda looked as if she would be sick.

"You think you're being funny, don't you?"

"What?"

"Are you that much of a damn moron that you can't even make something to eat properly?" Amanda shouted as she got up off of the couch.

"Baby, wait-"

"Get away from me, you have done enough!!!!!" Amanda yelled, slamming the bedroom door. Nick sat down, feeling dejected. He didn't seem to do anything right these days...how was he gonna take care of a newborn? Fear and doubt clouded his thoughts until Nick heard AJ walk into the house.

"Hey, Peanut!" AJ said, smiling at the little girl. Celine giggled and held her chubby little arms up, reaching for him.

"Nick, what's wrong?"

"Amanda hates me. I made her a turkey sandwich and she started yelling at me. Nothing I do makes her happy, she's always yelling anymore." Nick said in a hollow voice.

"Is that all? Nick....turkey has been making Amanda sick. The baby has her up a lot with morning sickness....I thought you knew that." AJ laughed.

"No, I had no idea. So what do I do?" Nick asked.

"Bring her something else to eat and go talk to her. I suggest pizza.....she's been chowing down on it a lot lately." AJ suggested. Nick smiled slightly and went into the kitchen to make his wife a homemade pizza....he just hoped it would work and things could be normal again.

Chapter 8


Nick carried the tray up to the bedroom with care, knocking on the door slightly.

"Amanda?" he called, not moving into the room just yet.

"Hi, honey." she said as she laid in bed watching television. She seemed calmer now than she had been an hour ago.

"I figured you were still hungry so I made you this." Nick smiled. He laid the tray in front of her and Amanda grinned, smelling the pizza.

"Oh wow, this....is....mmmmm..." she muttered, her mouth full of warm cheese. Nick smiled at his wife as she ate half of the pizza herself.

"I take it that you like it, then? I'm sorry about earlier." he apologized, looking down at his lap. Amanda licked her lips and sighed with content before taking his hand.

"Baby, my emotions are so out of whack right now....I didn't mean to treat you that way. I love you and I'm sorry I said all of that." she replied. Nick looked away from her and sighed, a small smile on his face.

"I understand, I have just been working so hard getting the album together. Management isn't happy that I have put it on hold again." Nick explained.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to put everything on hold to take care of me. I am only five months pregnant. We got plenty of time." Amanda said, taking his hand in hers. Nick smiled at her, he had wanted to be around for every part of this pregnancy...but it was great that his wife was so understanding.

"Are you sure? Cause I would have to go to LA for about a month or so to record. JC said he'd cover for me at the club."

"I will be okay, AJ is here to help out and so is Aaron. Don't worry about a thing. I know how important this album is to you, you put it off enough with the accident and our wedding." Amanda said. Nick's hand rested on her belly, just over her navel....He felt like the baby sensed his presence. Would he be all right leaving her alone for almost two months?

"I don't know about this.." he whispered, his voice choppy.

"I promise it will be fine." she reassured him as she kissed him gently on the cheek. Nick left for LA a few days later, and now Amanda was home with AJ, Celine and Aaron. She knew Nick was hesitant about leaving her to record but she didn't want to hold him back....this album was important, a comeback for Nick. He had been through so much in the last year with the car accident that she wanted him to make music again, to be Nick again. All Amanda could think about was the days Nick lay in his bed....unable to walk, but writing in a notebook he kept at his bedside, humming a tune occasionally as he did. It had made her smile to see him trying.


Nick made it safely to Los Angeles, making time to call Amanda once he got to the airport. He was staying at JC's apartment for the time being....JC Chasez was an old friend of his from the beginning of his career.



"How was your flight?" JC asked when Nick's taxi reached his apartment.

"It was smooth. I don't like being out here, JC....I should be home taking care of Amanda and not recording an album like Howie wants me to do." Nick muttered as he carried his bags inside. JC's apartment was spacious....it wasn't cozy like home.

"I know you're worried about the baby, but it will be fine. She isn't that far along yet and you'll be home in no time. Just relax and have fun." JC said, patting Nick on the back. Nick nodded but it didn't ease his feelings. He tried to sleep that night but tossed and turned, tangling himself in the sheets as he worried about the baby. Nick wanted a son more than anything and he just hoped things would go well for once in his life. The days started to pass quickly once Nick got into the recording studio again, he had some songs written but nothing jumped out at him.


"What's this one?" JC asked, holding up Nick's notebook. Nick always carried the notebook with him for when an idea struck. The lyrics were written hurriedly and several things had been crossed out and rewritten.

"Oh....that....it's nothing." Nick mumbled, trying to take the paper away from him. JC sat down on the chair across from him, reading it and nodding.

"Why haven't you recorded this song yet?" JC asked. Nick snatched the notebook back, sighing.

"Because that song is very personal. I wrote it when I was going through depression." he explained.

"Sing some for me." JC begged. Nick went over to the keyboard and propped the notebook up, playing softly.




"It's so cold....in this room, and I'm trapped inside your heart all by myself...." he sang softly, his eyes watering with each verse. He couldn't get through it....the song only reminded him of her....


"Nick, its okay. I know you miss her." JC offered, putting an arm around him.

"I wrote this for her but she will never hear it. I don't know if its a good fit for my album....it's so personal." Nick whispered.

"Sometimes it is for the best. As artists we need to express ourselves, I think this song is perfect." JC replied. Nick thought it over and a few hours later he began to record it....he knew he was on his way to gaining closure and hoped that Tracy would be proud of him wherever she was.

Chapter 9


Since JC had gone to Miami to help out at Amanda's nightclub.....Nick was free to work on his music alone. As much as he liked to write and record....Nick was incredibly lonely in LA. He didn't like the open layout of JC's apartment. Nick remembered recording his first album here, when he was only 18. Now he was 26 and getting ready to do a third one. After JC had encouraged him to work on the song some more, Nick had finally finished writing what he titled Falling Down, a song that had deep personal meaning to it....a song he hoped would help the healing process some more. In addition to writing, Nick also spent a lot of time on the phone with his wife, he would check on her every day when he could.

"Nicky, I am fine. The baby is healthy....and you will be home soon. Don't worry so much." Amanda would tell him.

"I should be home in about two weeks. The time flew by so fast, baby. I can't wait to see you again. How is Celine?" Nick asked, hearing his daughter in the background.

"Say hi to daddy, Celine."

"Daddy?" Celine asked. Nick smiled with tears in his eyes. Celine was growing more and more each day....she could walk and was beginning to talk on her own, she was a smart girl.

"Hey, baby girl. Daddy misses you." Nick replied.

"Mama miss you."

"I know, Celine...you take care of mommy and the baby....okay?"

"Kay." Celine giggled and Amanda came back onto the line.

"I miss you so much, Nick." she said. The two of them talked for a while before AJ came into the room, holding his car keys.

"Ready to go?" he asked. Amanda was due for an ultrasound, she was nearly 7 and a half months along now.

"Yes, Jay." she said, and he helped her out to his red pickup truck. He drove Amanda to her appointments since Nick was away, and had been a great help to the family as he always was.

"I can't believe this little one will be here soon." Amanda said, rubbing her growing belly as they drove to the doctor's office.

"Do you know what it is yet?" AJ asked, helping her out and walking her inside. Amanda frowned, she and Nick had decided to wait until the baby was born to find out the sex and the decision had not been easy for her. Part of her was still curious and wondered if the baby was a little boy like she and Nick were hoping for. Amanda knew that this boy would look like Nick, it seemed with Celine that his features were more dominant than hers. Celine had inherited her father's blonde hair and blue eyes....her father's smile. Nick had tried to disagree, but everyone said that it was obvious who the baby's father was.

"Mrs Carter....the baby is developing very well....as you can see from the ultrasound." the doctor said as she showed Amanda the image on the screen. Amanda felt her eyes water when she saw the baby inside of her....healthy and normal.

"Would you like to know what this little one will be?"

"Sorry?" Amanda said, blinking as her thoughts were interrupted.

"Would you like to know the sex of the baby?" the doctor asked. Amanda sat there as she looked at the picture, grinning. She knew already what the answer would be.




Nick waited to board his flight back home to Miami....he was looking forward to being home with his family.

"Nick!!!!" Aaron said, wrapping his arms around his big brother as he walked in the house that afternoon.

"Hey, kiddo." Nick laughed. He ruffled the 13 year old's hair and was met with his golden retriever, wagging her tail and barking excitedly.

"Did Michelle miss daddy?" Nick said as he bent down to receive a slobbery kiss from his dog.

"Baby, you're home!" Amanda exclaimed. Nick held her tight and kissed her passionately, Amanda smiling the whole time. She felt whole again now that her husband had come home.

"God I missed you. Is everything okay here?" Nick asked, walking into the kitchen with her.

"Doctor says the baby is healthy and everything is fine. I am just happy to see you." Amanda replied.

"Great. Well, the album is finished recording, I have to do some photo shoots in Orlando and then I will be home more hopefully."

Nick and Amanda kissed for a long time, her hands resting in his back pockets as she felt his ass, missing his body against hers until the phone rang. Nick ignored it, kissing her....his tongue dancing with hers.


"Babe, you should answer it." Amanda said, giggling. Nick ignored the phone and took her upstairs.....laying her down on the bed. His cell phone began to ring this time.

"I missed you so bad...." Nick whispered, his face nuzzling into her neck as she felt his lips touch there once more. His hand found her breasts, swollen from pregnancy and he massaged with one hand as he continued to kiss.

"Oh, god...." Amanda moaned. She and Nick had not been together in quite some time and she was ready for him....but the baby didn't seem to think it was a good idea.

"Nick...."

"Mhmmmm?" he said, his mouth on her shoulder. He ignored the fact she looked like she was going to be ill...


Amanda didn't have time to react or move, her stomach churned and Nick was covered, along with his clothes and the bed sheets.

"Yuck...." Nick commented, backing away from her, his shirt wet with vomit. All Amanda could do was laugh....she laughed as Nick went to the bathroom and cleaned up.

"I am so sorry about before, baby." Amanda giggled, Nick laying next to her a while later....he smelled of soap and cologne, his hair laying in damp strings against his face.

"Don't worry about it." Nick said, kissing her on the cheek. Amanda sat up, her hand going to her stomach.

"What's wrong?" Nick asked with concern, frowning. Amanda smiled and placed his hand over her stomach, just under her navel. Nick couldn't believe it, he was feeling the baby kicking.

"That's amazing..." he whispered in awe.

"It really is, baby. This little soccer player will be here before we know it." Amanda replied. Nick leaned over, his head next to her stomach as he did most nights, he loved to talk to the baby.

"Hey, kiddo. Daddy can't wait to meet you....be good to your mom, she needs to rest. You can do all the kicking you want when you play for Tampa when you're older." Nick whispered.

"Nick, if it is a boy he is not playing for the Bucs." Amanda said as she hit him playfully.

"Well what team do you suggest then?"

"The Giants. Gotta represent back home."

"Giants? Might as well be the Jets. As long as he's not playing for the Cowboys, I will be happy." Nick laughed. He and Amanda kissed again, it was good to be home.

Chapter 10

Nick was back home but still had a lot to do with his album. He left earlier in the mornings now sometimes, even before Aaron went to school.

Aaron was a good student, not as bright as Nick had been but got good grades due to his brother's tutoring and guidance with his homework. A while after Nick and Amanda's wedding, Amanda started noticing the 13 year old becoming quiet. He came home from school and rushed up to his room most days without barely a hello to her or his brother.

"AJ, is something wrong with Aaron?" Amanda asked as she watched the boy studying in the kitchen, concentrating on a math book propped open. Usually Nick would sit and go over it with him but he was so busy these days he wasn't home often.

"He's been quiet. I noticed he's on his computer a lot in chat rooms. If I try to talk to him he closes the door in my face, I think its just him being a moody teenager." AJ said. Amanda decided he was right and shook it off, chalking it up to normal teenage behavior.



"Amanda, can you bring me to school?" Aaron asked one morning, coming into the kitchen with his backpack.

"Sure." Amanda offered. She got Celine and drove Aaron to school. Aaron was in 8th grade at Oceanview Middle School, the same where Nick went as a child. Amanda smiled as she remembered when she met Nick by the willow tree not far from the elementary school.....the big blue eyes peering out of a garbage can after he had been bullied by some kids.

"I will get out here, thanks." Aaron said.

"I can drop you off out front." Amanda said as she pulled in front of the school. A group of boys stood at the end of the sidewalk, laughing as Aaron got out of the car. Amanda didn't leave right away, she decided to stay and watch. Aaron walked briskly to get past the boys but they had spotted him.


"Well, if it isn't Carter. Where's your brother?" the biggest boy asked, getting in front of him. Aaron wouldn't look them in the eye, he tried to walk past but was blocked.

"Not today, Mike." Aaron mumbled, looking at his feet.

"You think you're so cool cause your brother sings, don't you? How come you don't sing?" Mike teased.

"I don't want to."

"You can't....I bet you sound worse than he does! No wonder your mom didn't want you." Mike laughed, the other boys joining in.
"Don't talk about my family, Mike."

"Your brother must feel sorry for you, that's why you live with him. You're such a loser, Carter." Mike said before pushing Aaron to the ground, causing him to spill his books. Aaron didn't fight back. Amanda flashed back to Nick....Nick being unable to defend himself....


"Hey! Leave him alone!" Amanda shouted, getting out of the car as the other kids laughed.

"You're pathetic, you need a pregnant woman defending you?"
"Shut up, Mike. That's my brother's wife." Aaron mumbled.

"Good cover." Mike said.

"Excuse me? My husband isn't gay." Amanda snapped.

"He's gay if he sings that music. He threw away a scholarship to Princeton to sing. What a loser. Must run in the family."

"How do you know that?" Amanda asked. She couldn't believe this kid was so rude. Aaron kept looking at her, shaking his head.

"He went to school here, everybody knows." Mike replied as the bell rang.

"We will finish this later, Carter." he added. Amanda helped Aaron pick up the remainder of his books and he stood up.

"I gotta go." he mumbled. Amanda felt horrible, watching him go into the school with his head down. It reminded her of Nick and it killed her to see the bullying happen again.




Nick came home a few hours later and was sitting in the living room when he heard the door open.

"Aaron?" Nick was met with silence but heard feet running up the stairs and a door slamming.

"I will talk to him," Amanda cautioned, holding her belly as she got up. Nick looked confused but nodded and sat down to watch a program on the history channel.

"Aaron?" she called as she knocked at the door. She could hear him crying....it just hit her how serious the situation was. She almost thought of going back to get Nick, feeling nausea in her stomach as the baby inside seemed to disagree.

"Go away!" the teenager yelled, followed by something hard hitting the door, sounding much like a shoe.

"Do you want me to get Nick then?" she asked. Aaron cautiously poked his head out of the door, his red rimmed brown eyes shining.

"Aaron is something going on that you want to talk about?" Amanda asked as she sat down on the bed, her back hurting. She thought about asking Nick for a back rub later on.

"No, it's stupid." Aaron snapped moodily, scowling and walking near the window.

"I saw those kids push you. Don't think I haven't a clue what's going on....I saw it with your brother and I see it again with you."

Aaron moved and Amanda saw him cradling his wrist, wincing in pain.

"What's wrong with your arm?" Amanda asked. He reluctantly held it out and she saw that it was bruised and swollen. He had a few scrapes on his face as well, but they weren't too bad.

"The other kids....they don't like me." he began tearfully.

"Why not?"

"Because of Nick. They think I want to be famous like him....they pick on me a lot. The teachers do too, they always ask me why I am not as good as Nick was in school. Nick got straight A's....I'm not smart like he is." Aaron replied.

"Don't listen to them, you're doing just fine in school." Amanda said. His arm didn't look broken, but his spirit sure did.

"The other kids pick on me cause Nick is my brother, cause I have no parents....and when you yelled at them this morning they jumped me at lunch. Mike pushed me into a brick wall and beat me up....nobody stopped him. It hurts, Amanda. I will never fit in. I want to go back to my old school. I miss my old friends..." Aaron said, sniffling.

"I will talk to Nick about it and see if we can do something."

"Please don't tell him. Don't make me go back there, Amanda." Aaron begged. She stared back at him and wondered if she really could keep this promise, remembering something Nick had said when he was 15....





"If I show you, you can't tell anyone...."

"Nick..."

"Promise me."

Amanda gasped when Nick took off his shirt....revealing dark bruises...deep cuts along his arms and back....it made her sick to her stomach. He was so thin you could see his ribs and backbone....

"Who did this to you?"

"My mom...."




Amanda's eyes filled with tears as she remembered the promise she had made to Nick about his abuse.

"Aaron I'm sorry, I can't do that. We need to tell your brother, he is in charge of you. I will talk to him, okay?" she told him as she left the room, hoping Nick would take the news well.

Chapter 11

Nick heard Amanda come downstairs and he immediately stood up, eager to know what was going on.

"Well?" he asked, holding up his hands.

"Sit down, baby." Amanda said. Nick helped her to the couch and took the seat next to hers.

"Are you okay? You look like you feel sick. Want to lie down?" he offered, noticing her pale face.

"Don't worry about that, this is about your brother, not me." she said wearily.

"What's wrong?"

"Aaron is being bullied at school....and don't fly off the handle yet, let me finish." Amanda snapped when Nick opened his mouth to speak. He nodded and she laughed before continuing.

"Apparently his teachers are comparing him to you...and the kids are giving him hell...." she said before falling silent.

"You're fucking kidding me." Nick said, running a hand through his hair. He closed his eyes and heard them, heard the teasing...


"He's not going back there." Amanda told him, jarring him from his thoughts.

"I'm gonna talk to that principal, baby. It has to stop....if they did it to me and him, its gonna keep happening." Nick said suddenly, his voice stern. Amanda knew the subject was a sore one for Nick, who had been abused as a child at home and bullied by other children at school. He was the runt back then, a small and skinny boy with a mop of blonde hair that didn't look like he fit in. Amanda stared at her husband, he had grown up in front of her eyes, Nick was now taller than all of his friends....girls threw themselves at him, but she didn't mind cause she was the one taking him home at night.

"Want me to set up a meeting with the principal? I know you will want to pull Aaron from that horrible school." Amanda said, her hand on his back.

"Yes. Let me talk to Aaron...I'm sure he needs me right now."

Nick walked slowly up the stairs and heard Aaron playing the guitar. He stopped in the doorway and smiled, it was one of his songs.

"That's supposed to be a G, kiddo." Nick commented with a smile. Aaron returned it weakly and put the guitar down on his bed before rubbing at his wrist, which was bruised.

"I guess she sent you up here?" Aaron said softly.

"You're not in trouble....I just wanted to make sure you're okay. How long has this been going on?" Nick asked, pulling up Aaron's computer chair.

"Since the kids at school found out I am your brother....so a few months."

"Look, I know this is hard for you. Believe me, I went through the same thing when I was about your age."

"You did? But my teachers told me that you were one of the top students..." Aaron protested. He had seen pictures of Nick in a showcase at the school, various awards for academic achievement....high honor roll, and he knew Nick had been valedictorian of his graduating class in high school. Nick had a 4.0 GPA and was in the top 5 of his graduating class. Aaron felt as if he would never catch up to his brother....he would never be that smart.

Aaron wasn't dumb, but he didn't get straight A's like Nick did. He could sing but didn't tell anyone, he didn't want to be compared to his brother any more than people already did. He wasn't bitter, but as a result he didn't believe in himself as he knew he should.

"Aaron, I was a good student....I played basketball in high school but I wasn't popular. I didn't want to fit in. Brian was the popular one, not me. When I was a kid I got bullied too. They put me in trash cans and rolled me into brick walls, threw kick balls at my back....they did a lot of things." Nick told him. Aaron listened with his mouth hanging open slightly.

"How did you make them stop?"

"I met Brian and they left me alone after Brian beat one of them up. You know my friend, Lance? Amanda's ex husband? He tried to fight me and Brian beat him up. He didn't touch me after that." Nick explained.

"Wow." Aaron said.

"I'm gonna talk to Principal Williams and see what we can do, but you're not going back to that school, okay kiddo?" Nick said, placing a hand on his brother's shoulder. After his talk with Aaron, Nick found out that Amanda had made the appointment to meet with the principal.

"Nick, he was there when you went there wasn't he?" Amanda asked as Nick put his arms around her and kissed her, feeling her back.

"Yeah he was." he sighed, thinking. He remembered the principal....he just hoped that the meeting would go well.



"Nick, it's gonna be okay." Amanda reassured him a few days later, as he drove over to the school. The school held grades 5 through 8....and was next to the elementary school. The willow tree still stood there, the one where he and Amanda had met. He smiled as he thought of the initials carved in the wood, surrounded by a heart...

"Baby, are you ready?"

"Yeah." Nick answered. He walked into the school and took a breath. He was amazed that the place hadn't changed that much, he remembered a lot of things.

"Principal Williams will see you now," the secretary announced as the door opened to the office.

"Hello, Mr. Carter....so nice to see you." Principal Williams said as he took Nick's hand, shaking it vigorously. Nick smiled weakly at him. The principal was a short man, chubby and with balding brownish grey hair.

"This is such an honor to have you visit our school, Mr. Carter..." he continued, walking right past Amanda as she shook her head at him. He was too busy buttering Nick up to notice a pregnant woman in his office.

"Oh, this is my wife Amanda. She and I look after my brother....Aaron." Nick explained, but he was cut off.

"Yes, Adam is a fine student."

"His name is Aaron. I came to talk to you because he is being bullied by the other classmates." Nick said as he sat in a leather armchair across from the desk. He didn't like that the principal seemed as if he didn't care, he simply cared that Nick was a celebrity.

"Alex is not bullied, we don't allow that in this school." the principal said, facing a potted plant near the window. Amanda saw Nick clench his hands against the chair, he was getting annoyed.

"Sir, his name is Aaron." Amanda offered, but she was ignored.

"How can you say you don't allow bullying? It happened when I went to school here, Principal Williams!" Nick hissed.

"Those are serious allegations, Mr. Carter. I can assure you we do not allow violence in our school-"

"With all due respect, he came home with a bruised arm-" Nick began.

"If I may remind you, Mr. Carter....home life reflects on a student's behavior during school hours, I would question his upbringing considering your past." the principal stated. Nick was getting angrier by the second.

"Sir, I live with them, Aaron is being taken care of." Amanda stated calmly although she wanted to slap him.

"I highly doubt any student harmed your brother...."

"Listen here, if you're not gonna make those kids stop bullying, I am gonna bring this to the media's attention. This is a serious matter!" Nick shouted, standing up and slamming his hand on the desk, causing the principal to jump.

"There is no need for that, Mr. Carter, surely we can work something out for young Andrew."

"HIS NAME IS AARON!" Nick shouted, his face red.

"Baby, calm down!" Amanda scolded him.

"If you do not restrain him, I am going to have to ask you to leave." the principal said.

"I'm out of here." Nick said, storming out of the room, slamming the door and leaving Amanda looking on in shock.

Chapter 12


Nick walked out of the principal's office feeling angrier than he had felt in a long time. He walked quickly, picking up his pace until he saw the willow tree. As a child this place had calmed him down....when he closed his eyes he could hear their catcalls and laughter. Nick climbed and sat in the branch, it was very sturdy. He sat there for a while, listening to the wind rustle in the leaves. He wiped his eyes, how could this be happening again? How could he let someone berate him like the principal had done? He blamed himself. Aaron didn't deserve any of this, he didn't deserve to go through what he had. Nick sighed and felt something in his back so he turned...and that's when he saw it. Carved sloppily in the wood was a heart...

N & A


He smiled, feeling it with his fingers as he remembered the day he had met her.



"Are you okay?"

He nodded as he wiped his eyes, unable to take them off of her. She had long brown hair and chocolate brown eyes....he thought she was like an angel there to rescue him.

"What's your name?"

"N-Nick...." he sniffed. She reached her hand towards him and he stared at it, trembling.

"Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you."

Nick took her hand and the second they touched....he felt safe, like nothing would happen to him when she was around. He trusted her right from the beginning, when it seemed like nobody cared for him at all.

"I'm Amanda...nice to meet you." the girl said, smiling warmly at him as she pulled him to his feet and into the sunlight....



"Nicky?" Nick blinked and found himself back at the willow tree. Amanda was standing below him, smiling at him.

"I'm fine. Sorry I took off like that." Nick said as he hopped down from the branch and she put her arms around him.

"That principal was an ass. I am so sorry he did that to you. It's not your fault Aaron got bullied." Amanda replied, before kissing his cheek. Her eyes fell upon the heart carved into the tree and she smiled.

"I know it's not my fault...I guess I got carried away." Nick said, shrugging.

"Did you do that?" she asked, pointing at the tree.

"When I was a kid. I told you, I knew I would end up with you....you made me feel special...like I was important." he whispered on the way back to the car.

"Baby, you are always special to me. So what are we going to do about Aaron?" Amanda asked.

"I am pulling him out of that school. Maybe try a private one?" Nick suggested. Amanda smiled as she watched him open the door for her before helping her into the car. He was always a gentleman.

"Private schools are good cause they don't tolerate bullying of other students. We should look into that." she agreed. Nick was silent until they got into the driveway at home.

"I want to raise awareness, this bullying needs to stop....I am gonna talk to Howie and see what I can do about it." he said thoughtfully.

"That's a great idea. Make it safe for our kids, and make sure it doesn't happen again." Amanda agreed. Nick helped her out of the car and they went inside, hand in hand. Over the next few days, he and Amanda looked into private school for Aaron. They found a good one in town that was co ed, that had zero tolerance for bullying. Everything was working out just fine, Nick was home and taking care of Amanda as she entered her eighth month of pregnancy. Amanda noticed that Nick was on the phone a lot with Howie discussing the album, along with doing some interviews about raising awareness for bullying. Nick's schedule was becoming jam packed and he was working hard.


"Honey, you look tired....maybe you should rest." Amanda said when Nick got home from an interview in Orlando late one night.

"Look...I was trying to hold off telling you, but...I gotta leave for a few weeks." Nick said, bracing himself for her reaction. Amanda put her hand to her stomach, the baby kicking as if it didn't want Nick to leave.

"Nick....I'm eight months along....I have a feeling the baby is gonna come early. You can't go anywhere now." she said tearfully. Nick took her hand and kissed it, not looking happy about the situation.
"I have to go. There's some photo shoots for the album and I have press....things like that need to be taken care of in LA. I gotta go. I can't talk Howie out of this one." he said as they walked upstairs. Nick dug out a suitcase and began to pack, preparing for his trip.

Amanda watched him, holding her belly as she frowned....she didn't want Nick to miss this baby. Nick was set to leave the following day, he stood at the door saying goodbye, Amanda wearing a pout.
"Nick, I wish you wouldn't go. I really have a bad feeling about this." she said, putting her arms around him.

"Its only for two and a half weeks, baby. I will be back in no time, the baby's not due for a while yet." Nick answered as his taxi outside honked. Amanda held Nick and kissed him....her tongue dancing with his as she held him. She was determined to get him to stay in Florida as long as possible. She grinned when they parted, could feel his heat radiating from his body. Amanda led him away from the door, kissing him and letting her hands wander....she knew he was getting turned on.

Nick stole breaths of air as they kissed passionately, the fire between them ignited. He had forgotten about the taxi outside....he had forgotten about everything. He kicked the door closed and followed her into the house, what was one more night home with his wife?

Chapter 13

"Baby?" Nick muttered next morning, Amanda laying her head across his bare chest...fast asleep with her arm draped across his waist.

"Mmmm?" she said as he kissed her forehead. They could hear his Blackberry ringing next to the bed. Nick reached over and picked it up, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

"Nick where the hell are you? You were supposed to be here last night!" Howie's voice shouted. Amanda frowned, now fully awake as she heard the manager tell Nick off for missing his plane last night.

"Sorry, something came up. I'm leaving he house in a few. I will catch another flight." Nick said. Amanda sat up in bed and watched him get up, wearing only a pair of black boxer shorts.

"Baby, you can't go." Amanda begged him as he began dressing himself. The baby kicked and she held her stomach, she was so worried it would come while Nick was away and had a bad feeling about Nick leaving Florida to go to Los Angeles.

"I'm sorry but I have to. I can't miss this flight, Howie's gonna kill me. I got press later tonight." Nick said, pulling on a grey shirt. Amanda followed him downstairs and he kissed her goodbye before reaching for the doorknob.

"Mmm...babe...I gotta....I gotta go..." Nick said as she overtook his mouth again. Part of him wanted to just stay and not go to California at all, but his phone began to ring again.

"Please, Nick...I need you here." Amanda said, holding his hand tightly.

"It's only gonna be for a few weeks, I will be home soon. Aaron and AJ are here, Brian's a street over. You will be fine." Nick told her with a smile. He kissed her cheek and ran out the door. Amanda stood at the door, watching it as if he were going to come back inside, but she heard the taxi pulling away.

"Amanda, why are you crying?" AJ said, putting an arm around her.

"He left, AJ....he promised he'd be here for the baby being born...he can't miss this." Amanda said.

"Nothing bad is gonna happen. Don't worry, you're just paranoid." AJ reassured her, rubbing her back gently.

"You don't understand." she sobbed as he tried to comfort her.

"What am I supposed to understand, Amanda? Nick's only going to be gone for a few weeks, the baby isn't due for a while." AJ said. He led Amanda to the couch, calming her the best that he could but she was upset the rest of that night without Nick being there.

Nick landed in LA a few hours later feeling drained. For some reason he felt like he shouldn't be here, especially this close to the end of Amanda's pregnancy. He got a coffee at the airport and headed to the meeting with his record company. Nick had left RCA about a year or two ago and was now working on building his own label. Nick had learned a lot since he first got his record deal at 18. Going on 27 now....he knew things were better done on his own terms. With this new album, he was in charge. Nick picked the songs, Nick wrote them and picked the producers. Nick picked the design of the album cover....the clothing he would wear, the poses for the pictures. The album was about to be released and he sent Amanda the first copy, a tradition they did since he first got signed. He had also directed his own music video, something he was excited about. Nick was definitely growing up.

"Nick how's it feel to be married now?" Ryan Seacrest asked him on his radio show.

"It feels awesome. I have loved this girl for a long time and I am just excited to live the rest of my life with her. We are very happy." Nick smiled. He saw a text from her and grinned more.

I really wish you'd come home...

Babe sry got a lot 2 do out here, I'll call u later. In an interview with Ryan on air.

Okay, love you.

Nick put the phone down and smiled.

Amanda sat on the couch, feeling the discomfort from the baby making her nauseous. It was kicking again and had been bothering her since Nick left two weeks ago. She was in the middle of her ninth month and her belly was looking like a basketball, causing her a lot of discomfort on her back.

"This just came for you." Aaron said as he ran in the room with the mail. Amanda took the mail and smiled at the package wrapped in brown paper.

"What is it?" Aaron asked, watching her open it.

"Nick's album...." Amanda said with a smile. He looked so grown up on the cover, wearing a serious expression in the black and white photo. She turned it over, admiring the shirtless picture on the back cover.

"Put it into the CD player, I want to listen to it." Amanda said. Aaron gave her the remote and left the room, running into AJ in the kitchen as Nick's voice drifted into the room.

"Where are you going?" Aaron asked.

"I have to go to work for a little bit." AJ said. He laughed when Aaron's eyes went wide.

"Aaron you're old enough to handle this. I won't be gone long, she's being entertained by your brother and the baby isn't due for a couple weeks." AJ told him. Aaron grinned weakly.

"Okay, but what if she goes into labor?" Aaron asked.

"Call 911 immediately. Call Nick and then call me. Trust me, nothing bad is going to happen." AJ said. Aaron watched the door close and went back into the living room, sitting down on the couch and taking out his Nintendo DS. Amanda looked content, listening to the music and her fingers tapping against her stomach. AJ was right. What could possibly go wrong?

Chapter 14


Amanda sat in the living room with her feet up on the coffee table, a pillow under them for support. She reached for a mini Butterfinger balanced on her stomach and started chewing as she listened to Nick's voice. Sighing with content, her foot tapped to the beat of the song.


"I think I will put my space suit on, so I can jump into my rocket..."


The song fit Nick perfectly. As she studied the lyric sheet, she wondered what Nick was talking about in his song when suddenly a shooting pain got her stomach in a knot.

"Another big bang explosion..."


"Ow!!!" she cried out, the candy flying onto the floor. Aaron's head shot up, almost dropping his video game, his brown eyes wide.

No....not now...for the love of god...he thought, standing up.

"Amanda?" he said weakly, noticing her holding her stomach in pain.

"Oh god....AJ!!!! Where the hell is AJ????" Amanda screamed, holding her stomach as warm liquid dripped on the floor. Aaron stood frozen in place, shaking. This couldn't be happening now...

Nick's voice continued from the speakers as Amanda was overtaken by another pain in her stomach. She leaned on the wall for balance and held her stomach, starting to cry.

"I fucking told him not to go!!! Goddamn it Nick. Where is AJ!!!" she hissed. Aaron felt his heart race and did the only thing he could think of.

"DON'T COME OUT!!! WE AREN'T READY!!!" he screamed, leaning towards her crotch and waving his arms.

"Aaron, yelling at my vagina isn't going to....HELP!!!!!" she screamed the last part of her sentence. This baby was coming today and Amanda was not happy about it. Aaron picked up the phone, nearly dropping it.

"911, what is you're emergency?" the operator on the reciever asked. Amanda was on the couch, yelling in pain again and Aaron was panicking, completely forgetting what he was supposed to do.

"WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!"

"I'm sorry?"

"My sister in law is in labor!" Aaron yelled into the phone, his face pale. Amanda took her phone out and texted Nick, breathing heavily from the couch.


Where are you?????



Nick sat in the middle of another interview with a radio station in LA.

"So Nick, you have a beautiful daughter....any thoughts of adding to your little family?" the DJ asked. Nick felt the phone vibrate on the table but didn't look at it.

"My wife is in her ninth month of pregnancy. We are hoping that the little one holds off until I come back, she's home in Florida." Nick replied.

"That's great to hear." the DJ said kindly as Nick's phone rang.

"Excuse me, I have to take this." Nick said.

"Nick, you have to come home!" Aaron begged. He heard Brian in the background and Amanda screaming.

"What's going on?"

"The baby decided to come out! You gotta come home!" Aaron shouted. The phone dropped from his hands, the color drained from his face. Hastily picking up his fallen blackberry, Nick laughed.

"Uh....I gotta leave. My wife is in labor...." he said before running out of the room, nearly tripping over his own feet.

"Daddy's coming!" he shouted, kicking the door open and racing to the awaiting taxi.




Brian ran into the house before any paramedics had arrived to find Aaron panicking.

"Aaron what's going on?"

"Make it go back in! We aren't ready!" the teenager yelled.

"I don't think you can do that, kiddo. That baby is coming today. Did you call your brother?" Brian laughed as he calmed Amanda, who was sobbing into his chest.

"He can't miss this baby, Brian. He can't..." she said, the paramedics arriving.

"He's on his way home now. Nick won't miss the baby. Just stay calm." Brian assured her. AJ arrived moments after Amanda was taken to the hospital.

"Shit, what happened? I was only gone an hour..." AJ said, scratching his head.

"Amanda's in labor, you moron!" Brian said, hitting him. They grabbed Celine and all went down to the hospital, Brian staying with Amanda in the delivery room.

"Brian, did you hear from Nick?" she asked, her hands clutching her hospital gown nervously.

"I talked to him earlier before we got here. Nick's on his way home right now, I promise." Brian said. Amanda didn't feel any better, she knew Nick wouldn't be home for the birth....and it killed her.

"Don't cry, you need to stay calm for the baby."

"Brian, you don't understand...Nick has to be here to see this."

"I do....a child being born is very important."

"No....you really don't. Nick's going to miss his son..."





Nick ran into the airport, his heart
racing. Why was he so stupid to think going to LA was a good idea? What made him think this wouldn't happen? He got on the airplane hoping for the best, nothing was gonna stand in the way of seeing this baby being born. Nothing.

Chapter 15


Nick sat on the airplane about an hour or two later, reading a magazine and tapping his foot nervously on the chair in front of him. His nerves were shot thinking of Amanda being in labor and him not there to see any of it. He was there for Celine's birth, loved every second. Seeing his daughter being born was one of the best moments of his life, looking into that little face made everything worth it. Nick loved kids and having a family was something he dreamed of even as a child. He wanted to be a dad more than anything....to give his kids what he didn't have growing up. He had a relationship with his father now....but as a child was pretty much on his own with an abusive mother. Nick had learned early on to take care of himself.


"Attention passengers, due to a equipment malfunction we are making an emergency landing. Please put your seats back into their upright positions and prepare for landing." the stewardess announced. Nick rolled his eyes and sighed as the seat belt light came on...this was not going the way he planned.



"He's not coming, Brian!" Amanda said tearfully. The contractions had lessened a bit but she was still in labor....they had been at the hospital almost three hours.

"You need to calm down. I will find out what is going on with Nick and if AJ knows anything yet." Brian told her before leaving the room. AJ was out in the waiting room with Aaron and Celine, who was sitting on the floor playing with a stuffed animal and giggling.

"Did you hear from Nick?" Brian asked.

"No, last I heard he left LA and is on his way. How is Amanda?" AJ told him, keeping an eye on Celine.

"She's very worried Nick won't make it to see his son." Brian said.
"How do you know what it is?" Aaron asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Amanda just told me. AJ, find out where Nick is and how long he will be....I can't exactly tell the baby to stay in." Brian sighed in frustration.

"Yeah, I tried that...didn't work. This is all your fault!" Aaron said, hitting AJ on the arm. Brian walked back to the delivery room...it was going to be an interesting couple of hours.



"What do you MEAN, there are no available flights?" Nick half shouted, startling the woman at the ticket counter who had bleached blonde hair and a bad tan. Nick thought she looked like an oompa loompa with her orange skin and snickered to himself.

"I just told you. I'm sorry if you couldn't process that information. Have a good day." the lady snapped. Nick scoffed and walked away from her, calling her a bitch under his breath as he took out his phone.

"Yello." AJ answered on the second ring. It sounded like he was at the hospital.

"Dude...we got a big problem." Nick hissed.

"Where in god's name are you? Amanda's in fucking labor!" AJ whispered.

"I'm in Texas....I think." Nick replied. He wasn't quite sure where he was but guessed he was at the Houston airport.

"You think?! Nick....either you are or you aren't. Why the hell are you in Texas?" AJ demanded. Nick looked around the busy airport in frustration...he didn't know what to do, all the flights to Miami were booked and there were none going to Orlando until hours later.

"We had to land. There's no flights to Florida. What do I do?" Nick asked, running a hand through his hair.

"You're Nick Carter, aren't you? You're famous. Use it for once." AJ said.

"I don't know if I can do that."

"Don't give me that, Nick. Grow some balls, march up to that counter and start bitching."

"Okay. See you soon." Nick sighed. He put his blackberry in his pocket and took a deep breath before approaching the counter. The blonde stared at him with icy eyes.

"Can I help you?" she snapped.

"I really would appreciate it if you could get me on a flight to Miami as soon as possible." Nick said politely. So much for growing balls. The blonde typed rapidly on her computer and smiled at him...but it was laced with sarcasm.

"I'm sorry SIR, but there are no available flights. Guess you're out of luck." she snapped. Nick clenched his fists and leaned on the counter, smiling at her.

"Excuse me....ah....Audrey....but you don't seem to know who I am. My wife is in labor and it is really important that I get to Florida." he said delicately, reading her name tag. Audrey's green eyes narrowed but she wasn't smiling anymore.

"I know exactly who you are but I can't help you." she snapped, looking at the computer and ignoring him.

"I'm Nick fucking Carter and I need a flight to Florida NOW! I don't care! Get me on a goddamn plane!" Nick shouted, slamming his hand on the counter and making several customers look at him.

"Well...if you hadn't left your wife at home during her ninth month of pregnancy, you wouldn't be in this situation, now would you? Wow, what a great neglectful father you must be. You can sit your ass down and wait like everyone else. I am not bumping a passenger for some spoiled pop star like you." Audrey sneered. Nick was shaking from anger at this point.

"I wasn't asking to bump anyone and you don't know anything about me or my life." he shouted.

"I know enough to know that you don't care about your wife and left her alone to go to LA. You're irresponsible." she told him icily.

"Audrey, what is the problem over here?" a man in a suit asked as he walked over. Nick read his name tag and saw that he was a supervisor. Before Audrey could speak, Nick interrupted her.

"She has been very unhelpful and I don't appreciate being talked to like I am nothing. I'm a customer." Nick said angrily.

"I have warned you about this before, and you have already been reprimanded numerous times for poor customer service. Clock out and go home, your services are no longer needed." the manager said before turning to Nick, who smiled.

"I am so sorry, Mr. Carter. Unless someone is willing to give up their seat...I'm afraid there is nothing we can do. We can get you on a flight later today if you wish."

"Thank you, sir. I needed to get home...we didn't plan on the baby coming early." Nick replied, his eyes watering as the manager apologized again and walked away. Nick wiped his eyes and looked around, running a hand through his hair. All he wanted to do was cry....he felt humiliated and was kicking himself for everything. He sat down on a bench, his head in his hands....tears falling. He was going to miss the baby being born and there was nothing he could do.


"Are you Nick Carter?" a voice asked moments later. Nick blinked at a young girl in her twenties standing in front of her....wearing a shirt with him on it. Nick was not in the mood to deal with some star struck fan.

"Yes I am. Look, I'm sorry...but I am going through something right now and it is not a good time..." he said shakily, feeling horrible for allowing himself to be vulnerable in front of a fan. The girl was pretty, reddish blonde hair and blue eyes.

"I couldn't help overhear your problem, Nick....I'd like to help you..." she said calmly. She held a plane ticket in her hands.

"Yeah, I'm sorry you saw that. My wife is in labor with our second child now, I am gonna miss it because I was an idiot and now I'm stuck here." Nick replied with a sigh. The girl put a hand on his shoulder, he felt calm after a moment of silence.

"My name is Lisa. I was flying to Miami to see your show at the club...but you need this ticket more than I do." the girl said, smiling. Nick gaped at her, shocked that a fan would do this without question.

"I....I can't take that from you...you paid for that flight." he muttered.

"Look, I already missed the other flight and I just bought this ticket. In an hour you can board and be home with Amanda. I can always go another time. This is important to you. Please, just take it." Lisa drawled. Nick was so overcome with emotion that he hugged her, wrapping his long arms around her body. He heard her squeal slightly and laughed when he let go, her face pink.

"This means so much to me. Look. I will pay for your flight. When you get to Miami....call this number. They will take care of you." Nick said as he wrote her a check and a phone number. He got the ticket changed to his name by the supervisor and ran to the terminal with a smile on his face....Daddy was on his way home.

Chapter 16

Amanda was becoming more impatient by the minute. She had been in labor for a few hours...all she wanted at this point was to get the baby out of her stomach.

"Brian...where in god's name is my husband? He should have been here a long time ago!" she sobbed.

"Trust me, he is on his way. Have faith. Did you think of any names for the baby?" Brian asked calmly, holding her hand and trying to keep her relaxed.

"I was thinking of letting Nick name him, since I named Celine." Amanda replied, sighing. Things were so much different when Celine was born. Nick was 25 and had just been widowed months earlier.




"Nick....I'm pregnant." she told him, grabbing his arm as he got to his car. Nick had been avoiding her for months after Tracy's death...hiding from the world.

"You're pregnant? Is it mine?" Nick asked, his blue eyes wide with fear. Amanda knew he wasn't ready then...wasn't ready to be a dad even though she knew how much he wanted a family.

"Nick, I don't know but if it is...what are we going to do?" Amanda asked as he held her.

"We will work it out." was all he could say. Of course he had been helpful at first but Amanda saw he was afraid. Nick was afraid he would screw Celine up like his parents had done to him, even though Amanda assured Nick he was just fine. Sure he had some issues but she loved him anyway.



"Hold on a little longer..." Amanda whispered, running her hand over her hospital gown. She felt a lot of movement inside her, she knew the baby was coming any time.



"Goddamn traffic." Nick growled in the taxi as it left Miami International Airport and headed for the hospital.

"Sir, I'm sorry I cannot make the car go faster." the driver apologized.

"I'm going to miss my kid being born, is there a shortcut or something?" Nick asked, his voice soft. Nick stared out the window, his stomach in knots as he worried he would be late. The cab finally pulled up to the hospital and Nick ran inside, almost tripping over himself.

"Where the hell have you been?" AJ shouted as Nick raced past them to find the delivery room.

"Hell!" Nick managed to get out. He raced down the hall and skidded to a halt before running right into Brian, the two of them falling on the ground in a heap, Nick's face over his.

"Dude, get off me. I love you but you're not my type." Brian said, shoving Nick off of him.

"Sorry, but Amanda didn't give birth yet, did she?" Nick asked breathlessly, brushing himself off as he stood up.

"No, but you better get in there. She's worried sick about you being here." Brian told him. Nick went into the delivery room after checking with the nurses to let them know he was her husband.

"Thank god. Nick, where have you been?" Amanda breathed when she saw him, his forehead beaded with sweat.

"Hell." Nick said as he kissed her on the cheek.

"Where is that?" Amanda asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Texas..." he replied as she laughed. Amanda laughed but pretty soon the pain started again....her stomach contracted and she cried out.

Nick's eyes went wide as he remembered Celine's birth...

"Someone get the doctor!" he shouted. He had made it just in time, the baby was coming whether he was ready or not. Nick watched the doctor come into the room and shook his head, it was Dr. Abrams....the one who had delivered Celine.

"Not him again..." Nick mumbled under his breath.

"Let's get this show on the road!" Dr. Abrams said, clapping his hands together. Amanda looked annoyed at the doctor and Nick held her hand, squeezing it.

"Looks like this one's ready to come out finally." the doctor commented.

"Finally?" Nick said.

"Baby I have been in labor for a few hours...." Amanda said as she was overtaken by another contraction. She squeezed Nick's hand harder and he winced. Amanda pushed and did her breathing as she had practiced...Nick watching in anticipation. His heart was racing, but he kept as calm as he possibly could for his wife.

"I can see the head!" the doctor said. Nick held Amanda's hand and kissed her cheek, smiling.

"Baby, just a little longer....you can do it!" he whispered in her ear. Amanda was drenched in sweat, her face tinted red and in incredible pain....but she pushed and pushed.

Nick watched everything, it was so surreal for him to be witnessing this again, he was happy but at the same time he was nervous. The baby was lifted away from Amanda, and Nick kissed her again.

"You did it..."


Amanda was so happy to hear the baby crying, it was the best sound she'd heard in a while. She leaned into Nick and cried as he kissed her hand and whispered to her, tears in his eyes.

"Say hello to your beautiful son." the nurse said after the infant was cleaned off and wrapped in a blue blanket. Nick gaped at Amanda in shock.

"Surprise..." she smiled as he teared up more. The baby was small and had some light brown hair on his head.

"You knew? You knew it was a boy? Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, watching the baby in his wife's arms.

"I wanted it to be a surprise. Next time, will you listen to me when I tell you not to leave?" Amanda laughed. Nick looked down at his son in awe, smiling at him.

"You want to hold him?" she asked him. Nick nodded fervently and pretty soon the baby was in his arms.

"Hey, little guy...." he said. The baby slowly opened his eyes and looked up at Nick...they were a deep blue. Nick smiled and felt the tears fall down his cheeks.

"Mommy needs to rest...you can come back in a little while." a nurse said after taking the baby from Nick.

"I'm so proud of you." Nick said, kissing Amanda again as she laid back in her bed, sighing.

"We can name him a bit later." Amanda told him. She was exhausted and wanted to sleep for days.

"We didn't talk about what to name him, though. What are we gonna call him? We can't just say "hey you" his whole life." Nick said as Amanda laughed.

"Baby, I named Celine....this one is all yours. Pick a good one." she said. Nick smilked and walked out of the delivery room, running a hand through his hair. He was smiling like he had won the lottery....a son was everything he had hoped for and he had gotten his wish. He loved Celine dearly but now he felt his little family was complete. Naming the boy was a challenge, he need to think of a good one. Walking down the hallway, he spotted Brian and AJ in the waiting room playing with Celine, who was giggling. Nick smiled....he knew just what the little one's name would be.



"So what did you come up with?" Amanda asked a while later, the forms for the birth certificate in front of her. Nick sat in the chair next to the bed, still grinning.

"Bryan Alexander...." he said softly.

"Baby, won't that get confusing with Brian around?" Amanda asked.

"Spell it with a Y. Like Bryan Adams. Brian and AJ have done so much for us....I think its perfect." Nick reasoned.

"Bryan Alexander Carter....named for the three best men in my life. I love it." Amanda said as she put it on the paper. Nick smiled again....everything was perfect.

"Baby, there's also something I need to talk to you about." she added after finished writing.

"What is it?" Nick asked, noticing the change in her tone. Whatever it was, they would get through it together.

Chapter 17


"What did you want to talk to me about?" Nick asked, sitting down next to the hospital bed and taking her hand in his.

"Nick...I have made you happy, right? I have given you what you wanted?" Amanda asked. Nick looked at her, his eyes narrowed.

"Of course you make me happy, baby. Just being with you is enough for me."

"Well.....I did some thinking. We have two beautiful children.....you and I agreed we would stop if we had a boy, right?" she said. Nick stared, blinking. Yes, he had promised Amanda that if they had a boy they would have no more children. However, deep down he wondered if Amanda was going to do what he thought she was.

"Baby, you have given me everything and more. Just tell me what it is."

"I want to have an operation and get my tubes tied. We won't have to worry about protection and I won't need birth control." Amanda replied. Nick's eyes traveled to the floor.....he knew she had decided to do this, he was going to respect her choice, but in a way he was disappointed. They did agree to just a boy and a girl, they didn't want a big family....or did he?

"When are you getting this done?" Nick asked quietly, his eyes not meeting hers as his thumb stroked her hand.

"I talked to the doctors and they agreed to do it while I am here. To be honest....I kind of planned this a while ago." Amanda said. She could see his expression, she knew what he was thinking. Nick was a little hurt that she hadn't talked to him and had just assumed that he would go along with it as per their agreement.

"Well, baby....if that is what you want, I respect your choice. Especially since you went through the trouble and all." Nick said. He kissed Amanda and walked out of the hospital room, walking to the nursery. He remembered doing this after Celine was born....after he had told Amanda to put Lance as the father of his daughter. He looked down at the babies behind the glass, Bryan was near the front, wrapped in a blue blanket and fast asleep. Nick smiled and put his hand up against the glass before curling his fingers and resting them there gently.

"Nick, you okay?" Brian asked from behind him. Nick turned around and coughed awkwardly, wiping a small tear out of his eye.

"It's been a long day. Guess I'm tired." he replied as AJ walked over holding Celine and Aaron trailing behind them. Brian was about to speak but AJ laughed.

"He looks like daddy." he commented, pointing at the baby.

"Not that much." Nick said as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and blushed slightly.

"Is that my nephew?" Aaron asked. Nick ruffled his brothers hair and chuckled.

"Yes it is, kiddo. What do ya think?"

"Do I gotta change his diapers too?" Aaron asked as everyone laughed, walking out of the hospital to let Amanda rest for the night.



Amanda was in the hospital for a few days after her surgery, and she was given bed rest by the doctor while she healed. Nick was suddenly overwhelmed with work, between working on promoting the album when he could, helping his brother adjust to private school.....and a newborn at home, Nick had his plate full.

"Dude, you look exhausted." AJ commented as they ate breakfast. Nick had dark circles under his eyes, his hair in disarray as he nearly fell asleep in his cereal.

"What?" Nick mumbled, running his hand through his hair and yawning.

"You okay? I mean....I can take the day off and help you with Bryan if you need it. You need sleep." AJ said. Nick's eyes closed again...he was so sleepy but there was too much to do, laundry to be washed, yard work...paperwork for the nightclub....

"Nick!"

"Huh? Oh....man...I gotta go. I have to go down to the club and take care of some stuff for Amanda whike she's resting." Nick yawned.

"Do you want me to stay home this afternoon?" AJ asked again as he watched Nick put on his jacket and shoes.

"No, I will be home around noon." Nick said before running out the door without touching his breakfast. AJ walked upstairs to find Amanda awake.

"Hey, Jay." she smiled, sitting up in the bed.

"I'm only gonna be home until noon. Nick had to step out for a bit." AJ said, giving her breakfast on a tray.

"He's been busy a lot lately, I've noticed. I told him he's doing too much." Amanda muttered as she nibbled at her toast.

"You know how Nick is. He likes to be Super Dad." AJ replied.

"Well, he better be careful...I don't want him to get burnt out. Maybe we should hire a nanny?"

"Don't be silly. Nick can handle it. I'm here to help." AJ protested, giving her a fake smile. Amanda knew AJ loved the kids like his own, but she knew the family needed a real nanny, especially since AJ owned the tattoo shop and was busier. He was dating Nick's drummer, Skye and Amanda knew he would probably be the next one to settle down.

"I'm gonna talk to him. He's doing too much," she said before AJ left the room. That afternoon Nick shuffled in, bags under his eyes.

"Hi, baby....how you feeling?" he asked, stifling a yawn and sitting on the bed.

"I'm good, how about you?" he replied.

"You look tired."

"Today's been a busy day." Nick explained.

"Baby, I was thinking....maybe we should get a nanny? You're doing way too much and its not good for your health..." Amanda said, but when Nick didn't answer she heard his light snoring and smiled. Tomorrow was always another day.

Chapter 18


Nick wasn't asleep long, the baby crying woke him up late that night. He slowly walked to the room next to his and Amanda's, where Celine and Bryan slept.

"Hey, little guy. You like waking Daddy up, don't you?" Nick whispered, rubbing his eyes. His body ached from lack of sleep but he picked Bryan up and held him close to his chest, the baby crying into his shoulder.

Nick got a bottle out of the refrigerator and warmed it up then fed the baby before singing him to sleep. By the time he finally dozed off it was six and his alarm went off at seven.

"Honey, aren't you tired?" Amanda asked when she saw him later that morning. He had bags under his blue eyes...which were dark and not the bright shade of blue they were normally.

"Yeah, but I have so much to do today. I will see you a bit later, baby." he said as he kissed her quickly on the cheek and dashed out of the room. Nick was even more worn out that afternoon, nodding off as he and Amanda lay in bed watching television.

"Baby?" Amanda said, turning off the TV. Nick looked up, yawning slightly.

"Yes?" he asked.

"I think you need some help."

"What do you mean? I am over all that stuff-" Nick started, but Amanda put a finger to his lips.

"Not that kind of help, sweetheart. You're exhausted taking care of it all by yourself. AJ is busier now at the tattoo place. I think it's time we hired some extra help." she chuckled. Nick sat up and stretched, thinking...his eyes searching.

"I don't know...." he whispered. Nick didn't like admitting he needed help but he knew she was right.

"You're tired all the time, it isn't healthy for you. You aren't Superman, Nick. I think we should look into getting a nanny to help out." Amanda said. Nick nodded but laid back in the bed once more.

"All right. We will look for someone to help."



Amanda watched him fall asleep, smiling as she stroked his hair.


Over the next few days, Nick held some interviews for a nanny, but nobody seemed to fit what he and Amanda were looking for. Some of them turned out to be fans...looking to get a glimpse of Nick and the house but he dismissed them quickly.
"This is insane, AJ. How am I gonna find anyone to help?" Nick said, reaching for the aspirin after a particularly annoying interview.

"I'm sure there's someone, Nick." AJ said as he drank from his coffee cup. He wasn't really liking the idea of hired help being in the house. For the longest time, he had been helping Nick to raise the kids....he felt like it was being taken away although he was too busy now.

"Well, I guess I'd better get ready for our guest this afternoon."

Nick swallowed the aspirin and went about cleaning the house, feeling tired afterwards. He yawned as the doorbell rang.

"I'm so happy to see you again." he smiled when he opened the door and saw Lisa standing there, looking nervous.

"Thank y'all for having me, Nick." she said in her southern twang, smiling as she came into the house. She looked around in awe.....this was Nick Carter's....this was his house. Lisa walked in through the foyer and into the living room, passing a MTV Moon Man on the coffee table and smiling as she touched it.

"I will go and see if Amanda is up for a visitor. Have a seat if you like." Nick said, grinning at her. It was the first time he had a fan in the house, had a fan this close to his personal life. Nick walked up to their room, Amanda smiling as he entered.

"Hi, baby." she whispered, his lips touching her cheek gently.

"There's someone I want you to meet....are you up for a visitor?"

"Sure."


Nick disappeared from the room and returned with a young girl, looking to be in her twenties. She brushed her strawberry blonde hair out of her face and took a tentative step into the room with Nick's encouragement.

"Amanda, this is Lisa....if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have made it home to see Bryan being born." he grinned.

"Oh, so this is the fan you told me about. It's wonderful to meet you." Amanda said as she shook Lisa's hand.

"It was the least I could do after Nick's display at the airport terminal." Lisa giggled.

"His what?" Amanda asked, raising an eyebrow. Nick looked down at his feet before mumbling....

"I kind of threw a fit because the ticket lady was a freaking bitch."

Amanda was thrown into a lapse of giggles and Nick blushed, his ears turning pink.

"Nick was upset so I gave him my extra ticket." Lisa continued in her Texan drawl. She wore a pair of worn jeans and a grey shirt, her hair pinned up loosely with a clip. Amanda thought she looked like the most normal fan she'd met in a long time....this was someone who wasn't out to kiss anyone's ass.

"Thank you so much for everything, Lisa. I'm glad you could help. I hope you are enjoying your visit to Miami." Amanda smiled.

"Oh, I am. It's a nice change of scenery. I work in a daycare back home...I see little kids and babies all day long when I'm not in school." Lisa explained.

"That's great, do you enjoy your work?"

Nick felt himself nodding off although he didn't mean to....when suddenly he heard Bryan cry in the next room. Amanda watched him leave to attend to the baby but she was interested to learn more about Lisa, who she was liking more by the minute. Nick returned with a fussy baby boy in his arms moments later, Bryan whimpering and clutching onto Nick's shirt...his face red.

"Give him to me..." Amanda said. Bryan cried but seemed to calm down in his mother's arms.

"How do you DO that? He likes to wake me up in the middle of the night and keep me up all day." Nick asked, yawning.

"Baby, you need to sleep."

"You look tired, Nick. Maybe you should listen to her..." Lisa pointed out.

"Good luck, I've been barking up that tree for years." Amanda scoffed as Lisa giggled again.

"I can't sleep, we have company." Nick yawned.

"Go and get Celine, bring her in here. Lisa, would you mind helping me keep an eye on the babies?" Amanda asked. Nick raised an eyebrow at this but brought his daughter into the room, her blonde hair in pigtails.

"She's beautiful! Your kids are adorable, Amanda." Lisa commented. Bryan lay on Amanda's stomach and Celine was placed on the bed next to her.

"Daddy sleepy." Celine said with a shy smile, looking at Nick.

"Daddy is taking a nap. Right, Daddy?" Amanda chuckled.

"Okay, fine....I'm going. You girls gonna be ok without me?" Nick asked, running a hand through his hair.

"Lisa is going to help me. Go get some rest." Amanda said. Nick shuffled out of the room and left his wife alone with Lisa....wondering if it really was a good idea.


"Nick looks so tired...I've never seen him look like that." Lisa commented once Nick was gone.

"Well, since my surgery and Bryan being born, he's been taking on everything....trying to be super dad. He can't do all the housework, his career, manage the club and the kids. We are trying to hire some extra help but haven't found anyone." Amanda replied.

"So you're looking for a nanny?" Lisa said, holding Bryan so Amanda could sit up in the bed. The baby seemed so calm with her, Amanda was surprised as Celine seemed to like her as well.


Nick woke about two hours later and noticed Lisa was still in the house. He was still tired even after the nap but got up anyway.

"Thank you for coming by, Lisa. I'm sorry for nodding off on you like that." he said sheepishly.

"It's no trouble, Nick. I love kids. It's my thing....I'm studying early childhood development in college so this is great research as well." Lisa told him when he showed her to the door. Nick said goodbye to her and went back up to the bedroom, taking the baby from Amanda.

"Nick....I think we should invite Lisa to stay here for a few days." Amanda said suddenly, throwing Nick for a loop.

"Are you sure about this? She's a fan."

"You should have seen her with the babies, Nick. I think she would make a good nanny." Amanda suggested.

"I don't know." Nick said. He wasn't sure if he could trust a fan...not with his kids or even the fact that his past would be exposed....he shuddered at the thought. The last thing he needed was for the fans to find out about his childhood or family...

"Nick. Just invite her....I think it will be a good idea....please trust me." Amanda begged. Nick nodded and called Lisa to invite her to the house, he just hoped Amanda was right.

Chapter 19



Lisa was nervous about staying at the Carter's house. Not so much about Amanda, but would Nick and the family accept her?

"You can stay here, this will be your room, Lisa." Amanda said. She was able to walk now, but still had trouble getting around sometimes. Nick was still running himself ragged taking care of everything.

"This is a beautiful room. Thank y'all for having me." Lisa said, looking out the window at the ocean behind the house.

"I hope you have a good time with us, Lisa." Amanda smiled. Lisa walked around the room until she stopped at a picture in a gold frame...a pretty woman in a white dress and Nick in a suit holding hands....

"Amanda?"

"Yes?"

"Who is this?" Lisa asked. Amanda hobbled over to get a better look and sighed when she saw the picture. Part of her was disappointed that Nick was not over Tracy's death yet....but the other part of her thought it was sweet he had hung her picture. But why here?

"I will just put this away for now." Amanda said, taking the frame from its post on the wall. She heard footsteps behind her and Nick appeared in the doorway.

"This was her room....her room......" he whispered, looking longingly at the photo. His eyes watered and he looked at his feet before walking away, down the stairs towards the kitchen. Amanda held the picture frame, feeling a little embarrassed.

"No, leave it up. I don't want to cause any trouble. It must be special to him." Lisa said. Amanda made a mental note to talk to her husband later but helped Lisa get settled into her room. During most of the afternoon, Lisa noticed Nick seemed distant towards her and wondered if she had made a mistake in staying with them.

"Amanda, I hope you don't mind....I think I should go home early. Y'all have been real nice, but I feel like I've been intruding." she said as Amanda held Bryan.

"Sweetie, Nick's been overworking himself. Don't pay him any mind. He's just tired." Amanda said as the baby gurgled and smiled at her. Bryan definitely had inherited his father's charm, he looked just like Nick....but his hair was growing in a bit darker. He was a quiet baby, but when he needed mommy, he made sure the whole house knew.



"Baby, what's the matter with you?" Amanda asked when she found Nick sitting on the back porch with his guitar facing the ocean. He had a notepad spread out next to him, a pencil laying on top. Amanda could make out the beginnings of a new song he was working on.

"I'm fine." Nick replied. He looked up at his wife, her hands on her hips.

"Lisa thinks we don't want her around, baby. You can't keep shutting people out like this. I don't like when you do that."

"I'm not-"

"Yes you are. She doesn't feel welcome. I was going to tell her I want her to take the nanny job, Nick." Amanda protested. Nick jotted something in the notebook and hit a few chords on his guitar, thinking.

"I like Lisa a lot....but like I said, she is a fan. I don't know if she'd be able to handle living with the real Nick. I have a lot of secrets that I don't need getting out, remember?" he said finally. Amanda sat down next to him, rubbing his back gently and kissing his cheek.

"We can have her sign a confidentiality agreement and Brian take a background check if it bothers you that much, honey. I don't want to push you, but the kids love Lisa and I like her." she said softly. Nick rested his head on top of hers, thinking again.

"I think that is a great idea, Amanda. I'm sorry I'm so paranoid."

"I understand, but please don't shut her out like you've done to me and everyone else before. I didn't know that you wanted the picture to stay in that room." Amanda said. Nick set down the guitar and put his arms around her in a tight embrace, kissing her again, his soft lips brushing against hers.

"That was Tracy's bedroom before we got really serious.....before we got married. I hung it there kind of to honor her memory. I regret never telling her how I really felt about her." he whispered.

"Oh, Nick....that's so sweet. She would have loved that." she smiled.


"Yeah, Falling Down was about her." Nick added. Amanda remembered listening to Falling Down the day she went into labor with Bryan and wondering what the song was about, it was such a sad song....

"I'm sorry you're still dealing with that, baby. I know her death was tragic for you."

"She comes to me in my dreams sometimes. She's happy I am with you....I know I made a good decision making you my wife. I'm grateful for you, Celine and Bryan. Everything is perfect." Nick said, kissing her again as they held hands, walking back into the house with his guitar.

"You should make Lisa feel more welcome, baby." Amanda whispered, watching him set down the guitar on its stand in the living room.

"I know. I just need to think of something." Nick replied.



"You wanted to see me, Nick?" Lisa asked the next morning when he met her in the kitchen for breakfast.

"I am off today and I want to show you something." he smiled as he washed the dishes.

"Okay...." Lisa replied hesitantly, remembering the day before. She wasn't sure what to think of Nick now.

Nick led her to his studio in back of the house, it was shut off from the main house with soundproof walls.

"Is this where you recorded your album?" Lisa asked, astonished he was bringing her here, when Amanda had said Nick never usually allowed people to visit.

"Yes, I wrote a lot of the tracks here. Would you like to watch me record a bit? What is your favorite song?"

"Heaven by Bryan Adams." Lisa said with a smile.

"Really?"

"I've always wanted to hear you sing it." Lisa blushed. Nick began to play on his keyboard, giving Lisa a private concert in his studio. Something told him his plan had worked perfectly.

Chapter 20


Lisa was getting adjusted to living with the Carters....the kids seemed to get along with her and so did AJ. She liked being a nanny, it was better than being back in the daycare in Texas. She was still going to college part time, but doing online courses in child psychology. Living in Florida wasn't all that different from back home but it had its moments.

"Baby not here." she said as she stole kisses on the front porch. Brian grinned and pulled her in for another as they spotted Nick's car heading down the street.

"That was a close one. Have you told them about us yet?" Brian whispered. Lisa fixed her blouse and coughed, adjusting her hair.

"No. Have you?" she asked.

"Hell no. I don't think Nick would like me dating his nanny. You're only....what...21?" he chuckled as Nick parked his car.

"Hi Brian. I see you've met Lisa...." he said, walking up the steps. Brian nodded but when Nick wasn't looking he snickered. Brian and Lisa had actually met in a chat room online a few weeks ago when she was still in Houston, and it was complete coincidence that she moved to the town where he lived. Brian followed Nick into the house, leaving Lisa to finish sweeping off the deck.

"So, how have you been?" Brian asked. The two hadn't spoken in a while, not since Bryan was born.

"Busy. You know me. Always got a project I'm working on. I've been writing some stuff....working in the studio a bit. Howie even was talking about me mentoring another artist like JC did when I started out." Nick replied as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

"Yeah, me too. I've been promoted to detective. I got my own office at the station and everything. No more patrolling and handing out speeding tickets for me." Brian said.

"Crap....I guess you can't waive my traffic violations anymore?" Nick joked, but half serious. Since the car accident he had actually gotten a lot better with his driving and hadn't gotten a ticket in a very long time.

"Haha, funny. So how's Amanda and the babies?"

"Bryan is a total momma's boy. Celine is talking up a storm now....she's getting so big, I can't believe only a while ago she was just born." Nick beamed.

"Before you know it, she will be a teenager and you'll be beating potential boyfriends off with a stick." Brian teased. Nick thought about this, his daughter was pretty....then he wondered what she'd look like grown up....

"Oh god, Brian. She's going to be gorgeous when she gets older. I can see it now. Amanda said so too....between her and me Celine is going to be a handful when she gets older." Nick said, setting down his mug.

"Told you. Better hope nobody steals her away." Brian laughed with a wink. The two of them talked for a long time and Brian left to go home. Nick went to see Celine, who had just woken up from her nap and smiled when she saw him.

"Daddy!"

"Hi baby. Daddy missed you today." Nick said, picking her up and kissing her forehead.

"Hey you." Amanda called from the doorway. She kissed Nick on the cheek and then took Celine from him, the little girl throwing her arms around her mother's neck and smiling.

"When did you get home?" Nick asked. Amanda put Celine down and he put his arms around her, giving her a proper kiss. His hands traveled down her back until she swatted them away.

"Just now. How was your day?" Amanda told him, giggling. She went to check on Bryan, who was sleeping in the crib next to Celine.

"Fine. Howie went over some things and we talked about the next album...some other stuff we want to do. It went really good, baby." Nick answered. He decided not to tell Amanda about the mentoring until it actually happened, nothing was set in stone as of yet. Nick watched Amanda interact with the children and smiled at his family.....life couldn't be any more perfect and he was grateful.




"Lisa, I'm gonna be on a conference call so can you just keep an eye on things for me? AJ is picking Aaron up so you don't need to worry about him." Nick called from the office a few days later.

"Sure, Nick. No worries." Lisa smiled. She went about washing the dishes in the kitchen until the doorbell rang.

"Hello. May I help you?" she said. A short blonde woman with brown eyes stood there, smiling. She looked a bit like Nick....Lisa could see the resemblance.

"I would like to see Nick, is he home?"
"He's on a conference call, would you like to come in? May I ask who you are?" Lisa offered. The woman stepped in, smiling as she looked around the living room. She was wearing a dress and sandals, her blonde hair tied back but looking brittle with specks of grey showing.

"I'm Jane....his mother." the woman replied. Lisa looked at her in surprise. She hadn't seen any photos of Nick's family since she'd been living there. Having been a fan of his, she remembered Nick didn't mention them at all, as if they didn't exist. Lisa wondered why he would hide them from everyone.

"Oh, wow. You're his mother? It is such an honor to meet you, Nick will be so excited to see you, I'm sure." she said fervently. Jane wandered around and picked up a picture frame sitting on the coffee table....one of Celine the day she was brought home from the hospital. A smile appeared across her lips.

"I don't know about that, but I'm sure he will be surprised." she stated. Nick emerged from the office a few moments later but when he came into the living room, he stopped dead in the doorway, his bottom lip quivering a bit.

"Nickolas...." Jane said with a warm smile. Lisa smiled at them both but it soon faded.

"What are you doing here? After all you've done.....why?" Nick shouted, his eyes narrowed.



Lisa then realized she had made a horrible mistake.

Chapter 21


Nick stared at his mother from his spot in the doorway, remembering the last time she had been there.


"You're not taking Aaron....what are you doing here?" he demanded. He refused to show weakness in front of Jane....refused to even show he was afraid of her.

The truth was, he was scared to death of his own mother.

"I didn't come for that, sweetie. I came to talk to you." Jane explained calmly, sitting down on the couch. She motioned for him to come and sit down, but Nick stayed in his spot, his hands trembling slightly.

"After everything you've done to me? Why the sudden....why the sudden change of heart?" he asked. Nick moved slowly towards the couch and sat down, running a hand through his hair. He forgot that Lisa was still watching.....that a fan was still in the room.

"Nickolas, I know I have not been the best mother-"

"You weren't a mother to me at all. Don't start that pity shit, it won't get you anywhere." Nick hissed. Jane's expression did not change, but he saw her mouth twinge a little, as if she had a bad taste inside.

"I am sorry for what I did. I came to talk to you because I have paid my debt to society and wish to bring our family together again. I don't expect to be forgiven for anything I've done to you.....but just require your acceptance. You were my first born....I wish I could take everything back." she said softly. Nick watched her, not sure what to say. His mother had abused him for 10 years....10 years of being told nobody would love him, that he was worthless....


"I don't know, m- mom." he whispered, his voice breaking calling her that. In Nick's mind he never had a mother. A real mother wouldn't have tried to starve him to death, wouldn't have hit him every day, wouldn't have left the scars he bore on his back or arms.

"I know this must be hard on you, sweetheart, but we can talk this out and work through it." Jane told him, placing a hand on his shoulder. It was then that the atmosphere in the room changed. Flashes of images raced through Nick's mind, his heart began beating quicker as he felt a panic attack coming on. A small child cried out in pain....





"Mommy, please don't hurt me anymore! I'm sorry!"



"You little shit. I expected the dishes done when I got home.....you're gonna regret this!"


He felt himself being dragged across the floor, towards the basement as he pleaded and begged for mercy....



"Nick?"




Lisa watched Nick go rigid, clutching his head as he began to cry. Jane didn't seem fazed, she was talking to him as if nothing was happening.

"Don't make me go down there!" Nick begged, sobbing.

"Nickolas, come on. Look at me!" Jane shouted, shaking him. Lisa ran to the phone and quickly dialed Amanda's number.....hoping she would answer.

"Hello?" Amanda said on the third ring.

"You need to come home right away." Lisa drawled, watching the scene unfold in front of her. She had no idea what was happening with Nick and felt she was about to lose her job.

"What is going on over there?" Amanda asked when she heard the commotion.

"Everything was going fine until she touched his arm. This woman came and said she was his mother...." Lisa said.

"His....his mother? Oh god. I will be right there!" Amanda shouted before hanging up. Jane and Nick were still fighting when Lisa returned to the room, Nick at her feet sobbing.

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HIM, JANE!" Amanda screamed not even five minutes later, running through the door. Jane looked up, her hand rubbing Nick's back as she tried to calm him....but she was making it worse.

"Amanda. This is a surprise..." Jane said sweetly. Amanda pushed her away and put her arms around Nick, whispering to him.

"Don't make me go...." he pleaded, tears flooding his eyes.

"How dare you come here. You're not welcome in our home." Amanda hissed, looking at Jane. If looks could kill, she might have murdered Nick's mother on the spot.

"I am not here to make trouble....I came to talk to my son is all. I didn't know he was going to have an episode. If he wants to continue our chat he can find me here." Jane scoffed, leaving a paper on the coffee table. Ever since Nick was a child, she didn't like Amanda being near him, she felt it was her fault Nick was taken away from her at 15.

"Get out before I call the police and do not come near him again. You've done enough." Amanda said. She saw Lisa running upstairs out of the corner of her eye, but she'd take care of that later. Right now she needed to comfort her husband.

"Baby, shhh. She's gone now," Amanda said in a soothing noise, holding Nick like he was a small child. She was surprised Nick had reacted to his mother's touch in this manner but assumed it was a psychological thing triggered by his child abuse.

"Oh my god." he whispered finally, blinking at his wife. He started to get his bearings and breathe normally again.

"Are you all right? What was she doing here?" Amanda asked. Nick got up shakily, one hand on his head.

"My head is killing me." was all he would tell her.

"Go lie down. I will get you some aspirin and we will talk about this a bit later, baby." Amanda replied. She led Nick to their bedroom and he laid down, falling asleep after a few moments. As she headed back downstairs, she heard Lisa crying down the hallway.


"Lisa?" she asked once she reached the room. Lisa was busily packing a suitcase and sobbing, her eyes bright red with tears.

"I'm so sorry.....I shouldn't have let his mother here and I caused so much trouble!" she said once she noticed Amanda standing there.

"Why are you packing?"

"Obviously I screwed up, didn't I? I figured once Nick comes to he will fire me...."

"No, Lisa. He's just been through a hard time with her, and I don't know what triggered any of this. Nick's never acted like this before. You're not going anywhere." Amanda said, giving her a warm hug. Now that Jane had shown up, Amanda knew their lives were about to be turned upside down. What were her true motives for being there? None of it made sense.

"She wasn't doing anything to him. They were just talking and she put her hand on his arm. That's when he freaked out. Why doesn't he like his mother? He's never mentioned his family before...." Lisa began to say but Amanda raised her hand.

"All of it will come clear soon. Nick has always been a private person, only few know about his childhood. You will find out soon enough. I'm going to go and check on him." Amanda replied before leaving the room. Nick was laying down, but looked up when his wife walked into the room.

"Feeling any better?" she asked.

"I'm so sorry this happened. My....well she just wanted to talk about our past. I guess maybe it was too soon. But is it bad for me to want to talk to her?" Nick asked softly.

"Don't be sorry. Nick....I don't like the idea of her being around, she is up to something and I don't want her near our family." Amanda said.

"Okay." Nick replied, his eyes searching. He seemed to be in thought but didn't speak anymore.

"We are going to have to tell AJ and Lisa the truth....everything now that she has come back into your life. They need to know who Jane Carter is." Amanda said, kissing him gently on the forehead.

"I don't know if Lisa can handle this, she's still a fan." Nick whispered.

"We will have a family meeting later. When you feel a bit better." Amanda said. She left Nick to go and check on the children.....leaving Nick alone. But as the minutes passed, Nick wondered.....was it so bad that he wanted to see his mother again?

Chapter 22




Nick lay in bed, hearing Lisa crying from his room. He knew she wasn't just a fan anymore and that he shouldn't have let that get in the way of his personal business....but it was out in the open now. He rolled on his side, his face half buried in the warmth of the pillow, his legs curled up into his chest as he sighed. He felt a bit better but his mind kept replaying things....kept wandering back to the last time he'd seen his mother before everything happened.

Jane Carter may as well have been dead after everything she did, after abusing him and Aaron. Nick had guardianship over his little brother now, but his own pain remained. Aaron was so much stronger than him emotionally at 13 years old, something Nick was slightly jealous of.
He lay in bed thinking until he could not hear Lisa crying anymore, Amanda's footsteps headed for the room.

"Nick?" she called softly, walking over to the bed and sitting down. He smiled at the touch of her hand, gently caressing his forehead as she brushed the bangs out of his face.

"Hey." he whispered, rolling onto his back. She leaned down and kissed him, he returned it.

"Are you feeling better, baby?" she asked. Nick nodded, although his mind was on Jane. What were her intentions with him? He figured there wouldn't be any harm in going to see her at least once, just to listen to what she had to say. However, he decided not to tell Amanda this. He knew she'd never let him do it.

"Yeah, a bit. How is Lisa? I thought I heard her crying." Nick replied as he sat up Indian-style next to his wife.

"She's okay, she thought I was gonna fire her for letting her in the house. Nick, I think we should really get a restraining order on her or something. I don't want that woman anywhere near our children." she suggested. Nick considered this for a moment but just nodded in silence.

"I'm just looking out for our safety, honey."

"I know what you mean....but first we need to go over some things with Lisa like you said before. She didn't know who my....my mother was when she saw her. I want to tell her and AJ everything." Nick replied. He still felt odd referring to Jane as his mother, but he figured he might as well get used to it. He didn't want to call her Jane. She was his biological mother whether he wanted her or not.

"So when did you want to talk to them?" Amanda asked, taking his hand. He stared off at the opposite wall, thinking.

"Go get them into the living room and we can talk about this today. It might be a bit of a shock for AJ....up until the night she tried to take Aaron back....he thought I was an orphan." Nick instructed. He and Amanda sat in the living room about an hour later, Nick trembling at the thought of how Lisa would react especially to his past. Fans didn't know what he'd gone through, to their knowledge he had a stable childhood but he never mentioned his family whatsoever.



Amanda went to get Lisa and then found AJ in the kitchen making a ham sandwich.

"AJ. Did you just get home?" she asked, grinning when she saw him.

"Uh, yeah. I was hungry because I hadn't gotten a chance to grab food. What's up?" he replied, spreading mayonnaise on the rye bread in front of him. He pressed the sandwich together and took a large bite, chewing while he looked for something to drink in the fridge.

"Well, we are going to have a family meeting in a few. Just you, me, Nick and Lisa. You can bring your food in the living room if you want." Amanda said. AJ raised a pierced eyebrow at her but followed, carrying the plate and a can of soda. Lisa was already sitting on the couch and Amanda went upstairs to get Nick.

"What's going on?" AJ said, his mouth full of ham. Lisa wiped her eyes, still a bit shaken up from earlier.

"Nick's mother was here, didn't you know?" she whispered.

"The psycho woman? Wow, I missed some good drama today. I need to stop going to work so much." he chuckled. Just then, Amanda came in the room with Nick, the two of them sitting on the couch opposite Lisa and AJ. Nick didn't look up, he was pale and his eyes traveled to the ground.

"Lisa, AJ.....Nick wanted us to have this little meeting because he has something he wants to discuss." Amanda said, nudging him gently. Nick took a shaky breath before addressing them.

"First of all, Lisa.....I am so sorry you had to witness what you did. My mother as of right now is not welcome in our home. I don't blame you because we didn't tell you about her. There is a reason for why I keep my family life seperate from everything." he said softly.

Lisa just stared. She knew from a fan's perspective Nick was secretive, but from her psychology classes she'd been taken....Nick definitely did not show that he'd been an abused child. Part of her wondered if the Nick she had been seeing for so long was just a really good act.

"Okay...but that doesn't explain why his mom was here. Didn't you have a restraining order?" AJ said, setting down his sandwich.

Amanda took Nick's hand as she saw him take another breath.

"The reason Aaron lives with us....the reason he is in my custody and I had the restraining order on her....well, this part is...." Nick started, his voice breaking.

"Nick, you can tell us. It will help." Lisa told him.

"I was abused heavily as a child and so was Aaron."

"You what?" AJ exclaimed.

"Nick was abused to the point where Jane almost killed him." Amanda said. Nick felt his eyes water as they continued, flashes of memories floating in front of his eyes.


"Nick was abused for 5 years before he met me when we were ten. I didn't discover what was happening to him until he was 15." she continued, squeezing his palm inside her own. Lisa's mouth fell open slightly and Nick looked at his feet, ashamed.

"I was locked in basements, closets....starved to death and beaten. Emotionally and physically abused for 10 years of my life. AJ, when we met, I told you I was an orphan. Well, my dad and I had not met at that time....so technically what I said was not a lie. I was living with Brian's family but never was I truly a Littrell. I ran away and met you, that was one of the best things I've done, and I don't regret it at all." Nick said. AJ nodded. He told them everything and when he finished, Lisa was wiping her eyes as AJ sat in a stunned silence.

"I hope you both understand why I haven't mentioned any of this before. I wanted to tell you because my....well Jane is not welcome in this house. She wants to be a part of my life again but I'm not sure what to think of this." Nick added.

"I don't want her here, baby." Amanda said, although Nick knew her feelings about Jane. Part of him....the child inside of him wanted his true mother back, wanted closure. He figured talking to her wouldn't hurt, as long as Amanda didn't know.

After the meeting was over, AJ followed Nick into the kitchen and watched him make some coffee.

"Man, Nick....I'm so sorry you went through that crap. I want to beat the shit out of her for doing that to you. Just promise me one thing....don't go looking for her, I think she's up to something."

"Do you and my wife share a brain? She said the same thing." Nick chuckled.

"I'm being serious. Don't go. Throw that paper out, burn it...shred it...but don't go to see her. I smell bullshit." AJ warned. He never saw Nick roll his eyes.

"Okay, AJ." he smiled, stirring his coffee.

Despite everyone's warnings....Nick thought he could handle himself talking to his mother.

People could change, couldn't they?

Chapter 23

Nick left his mother's place that morning feeling a bit strange, mostly due to the fact he was seeing her behind everyone's backs. He knew for a fact that if Amanda found out he was seeing Jane Carter....she'd never let him hear the end of things.

He wasn't looking forward to that.

So far, it had been going well. He and his mother were being civil. She was staying at a apartment in Orlando and Nick would drive up to see her once in a while. He felt very guilty for doing so, knowing everyone he cared for despised her.


Amanda hadn't really noticed a change in her husband or his behavior. She was back to working at the club and taking care of the babies when she was home. Having Lisa around certainly helped a great deal. Aaron was adjusting to his new school, which was a private school not far from the nightclub and AJ's tattoo shop. Everything seemed to be going well for everyone.

Especially Lisa and Brian. They still had not told anyone of their relationship but stole moments together when they could. Brian was a bit older but he and Lisa got along very well, having met online in a Star Wars forum when she was living in Texas. AJ was dating the drummer from Nick's band.....Skye. Nick still wasn't used to her being around the house, but AJ was happy. They'd met at Nick and Amanda's wedding and fell for each other soon afterwards.


"So how is everything, Nick?" Brian asked when he'd invited him to shoot some hoops at the park.

"What would you say if I told you my mom came back?" Nick asked, shooting the ball and missing.

"That's an H for you. Um, I'd say she's violating her restraining order." Brian laughed. Nick passed him the ball and rolled his eyes.

"You're just saying that because you're a cop. Do you think I should talk to her if she wants to be civil? Like what if she wanted to be a family again? What would you do?"

He looked at Brian, hoping he would make some statement of validation, a comment that would put him at ease and let him know visiting Jane was really all right.

"Nick, I would stay away from her. You know how your mom is, she's just trying to use you. For what, I don't know....but you're gonna end up being hurt. She's hurt you enough, don't you think?" Brian said seriously. Nick looked at his feet and sighed, he knew nobody would support his decision.

"I just wish my family could be together." he muttered.

"You have a great family now, Nick. A wife who loves you, a son and a daughter....Aaron...and your dad. I'd say it is perfect. I wish I had my family back too, but sometimes it is better to just move on."

"Okay well what if I told you I was seeing her?" Nick asked cautiously. Brian was about to take his shot but dropped the ball.

"Are you crazy? Jane Carter is not a good person. You need to stay away from her."

"She's not like that anymore." Nick protested without thinking.

"As your friend, I really don't want you seeing her. Does Amanda know about this?" Brian asked. Nick shook his head and put the ball down.

"I haven't told her, and I don't want you blabbing. Please let me figure this out, I need to know what will come out of it. I'm not letting her near my family or anything. It's just me." he told him. Brian promised not to say anything to Amanda, but he vowed to himself that he would keep a closer eye on Nick from now on.


Nick knew damn well he was probably making a mistake seeing his mother. She had been calm during their visits, but there was no reason he should doubt her, was there?




Lisa had just put the kids down for a nap when the doorbell rang. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she went to answer it. Brian was there with some KFC for the both of them.

"I thought maybe you were hungry so I picked up lunch. Where's the bosses?" he said as she let him in. They stole a quick kiss and went to eating their lunch in the living room.

"Nick is off doing errands and Amanda is at the club. I missed you." Lisa said. They ate their fried chicken and then cleaned up before watching a movie. The babies had not made any noise, so everything was calm as they settled in to watch Grease.

Brian started kissing her during the movie, his thumb stroking behind her earlobe as their tongues weaved in and out of each other's mouths. It was getting heavy until Lisa heard Bryan cry over the baby monitor.

"Time to work." she joked, putting it back on the coffee table. Brian looked up at her, smiling.

"Hold that kiss until I come back." she said. Brian sat there, tapping his foot to one of the songs and humming Greased Lightening when he heard a yelp come from up the stairs.

"Lisa? You okay?" he asked, but there was no answer.




"What's wrong, Bryan?" Lisa asked as she moved over his crib. Celine was sleeping in the next one, but Bryan seemed distressed. Lisa was about to pick him up when something hard struck her in the head, causing her to fall over in a heap.



"Lisa???" Brian called as he moved toward the stairs. He knew he had a gun hidden under his pants leg, but didn't need it right now. He walked slowly, listening for anything out of the ordinary. By the time he heard the footsteps it was too late. A hand clamped over his mouth, cloth covering him so he couldn't breathe. He struggled but the cloth was soaked in a chemical.....his eyes drooped and he fell down, laying motionless by the staircase.



When Nick got home, the first thought that occurred was the fact Brian's car was in the driveway. Secondly, the house was eerily quiet except for Bryan crying upstairs. Nick headed for the nursery but almost tripped over a body laying by the stairs.

"Brian?" he said, shaking him gently. Brian was not answering or moving at all and it worried him. He didn't look hurt so Nick began to call for Lisa.

"Where is everyone?" he asked as he entered the babies' room. Bryan was throwing a fit, Lisa laying on the floor in front of the crib. Horrorstruck, he ran to her and shook her as well.

It was then that he looked into the crib next to Bryan's.....and he felt sick.

Celine was gone.

Chapter 24

Nick felt his stomach churn, he overturned the bedding in Celine's crib...looking for what, he didn't know. He knew she was gone. Bryan was wailing in the crib beside hers, his cries echoing in the room. A bear was laying on the floor. It looked old and worn, one of its button eyes was missing. Nick picked it up and then the baby, balancing him as he called 911.

Amanda was going through some paperwork for the club when the phone rang.

"Baby, what's wrong?" she asked. She could hardly hear Nick over Bryan's cries.

"You need to come home.....please." he said, more urgently this time. Amanda reached for her car keys and ran to her car. She felt anxious as she rounded their street, wondering what could be going on for her to rush home. Her heart began pounding when she saw several police cars lined up, blocking the driveway.

"Ma'am, I'm sorry but you can't come in. There's an investigation going on." an officer cautioned.

"I live here! Now let me through..." Amanda demanded before presenting her identification. Nick was in the living room, bouncing Bryan on his shoulder and pacing as he tried to calm his son.

"Thank God you're home." Nick breathed, Bryan practically screaming his head off.

"What is wrong with Bryan? What's going on baby?" Amanda asked. Nick desperately tried to shush the baby boy in his arms as police went by in the hallway.

"Give him to me..." she said gently. Nick sighed once the baby was calm, resting against his mother's shoulder.

"Please sit down, sweetheart." he said shakily as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Someone tell me what the hell is going on here...."

Nick looked at her with such a tired expression, his blue eyes dark.

"Something happened here today while we were at rehearsal."

Amanda felt herself getting angrier by the second. Why wasn't he telling her?

"Nick just tell me....PLEASE."

Nick sighed again....his eyes full of tears.

"NICK."

"Celine is gone, baby. Someone took her....she's gone."

Amanda felt like she'd been dunked into a bucket of ice water. She clung to Bryan, feeling his heartbeat against hers. Flashes of images raced in front of her.....the night she found out.she was pregnant.....the day Celine was born....

"I came home and found Lisa on the floor by Bryan's crib, baby. The police have no idea who could have done it. Brian was attacked too." Nick said, but his voice sounded far away and distorted. Amanda shook with the realization that her baby girl....her Celine Nicole was gone. She didn't have her Momma to tuck her in....didn't have Daddy to sing her a lullaby.

"I'm so sorry...." Brian said as he approached. He had a lump on his head, and looked beside himself with guilt.

"Brian, what the hell were you doing here if neither of us were home?" Nick demanded. As this conversation went on, Amanda just sat silently rocking as she cluched her son, afraid to let him out of her sight.

"Nick, this was gonna come up sooner or later, but I'm seeing Lisa." Brian said sheepishly.

"You're dating our nanny?"

Nick and Brian almost jumped when Amanda finally spoke.

"I knew her before she worked for you, we net in a Star Wars online forum. I should have told you we were dating....but today I surprised her with lunch and....and I was atracked from behind....I'm so sorry." Brian stammered.

"I can't.....I can't deal with this...." Amanda sobbed, taking Bryan with her. Brian and Nick stood in silence, Nick clutching the teddy bear.

"What's that you have?" Brian asked, trying to change the mood of the room.

"I think it's Celine's but I've never seen it before. Have you?" Nick replied. Brian took it from him, examining it.

"It looks too old to be hers. Nick, what you and Amanda need to do is make a list of people, anyone that would want to hurt you....anyone that would want to take the baby." Brian said after handing it back.

Nick nodded, thinking. He held onto the bear even after police left....after they'd finished questioning. Amanda kept to herself, but she clung onto their son, not letting him out of her sight. Nick heard her crying late that night and it broke his heart....all he could do was sit back . Brian was working with his fellow officers to find her, but they had no leads.

Nick lay in bed that night holding the bear, thinking. It had to be a clue....it felt familiar to him, but he'd never seen it before. He had tried to call Jane for advice. She sounded shocked, gave condolences.

"I'm so sorry this happened, sweetheart. If there's anything I can do to help let me know." his mother had said when Nick broke down over the phone.

"Thanks, Mom. I just want to find who did this..why would anyone take an innocent child?" he breathed, wiping his eyes.

"There's an explanation for everything."

Her voice was too calm for Nick's liking, it left him feeling unsettled when they hung up. Nick would spend all day on the news channel, calling Brian for any information.

"You and Amanda need to keep calm, go about things as normal so you don't attract attention. We haven't gotten any ransoms. Do not go looking for Celine."

Easy for you to say...Nick thought to himself. He held the bear, looking out to the ocean....


He hoped something would come to light soon.

Chapter 25






Nick and Amanda spent the next day almost in trances. Nick had gotten a bodyguard after his wife pleaded with him. She wouldn't leave the house, hovering over Bryan and watching him with vigilance. Even Aaron was hesitant to venture outside alone, always taking the dogs when he strolled down the beach. Romy was small, but Michelle, being a golden retriever she could better protect him.

As a mother, Amanda was beside herself with worry over Celine. She couldn't take her mind off of it no matter how Nick or anyone tried. She didn't eat much or even smile....she would hold Bryan and sigh, her mind on her baby girl. It broke Nick's heart to see his wife so depressed.

"I'm gonna find Celine, Jay. If it is the last thing I will do.....I will get her back." Nick vowed. Amanda heard him in the other room, the last thing she wanted was Nick to do something stupid.

"Baby, please don't go looking for her. I can't lose you too. What if that is why they took her?" Amanda told him tearfully. Nick felt guilty as he went to sit on the front porch, holding the battered teddy bear once more.

"Hello, son. You seem troubled...is everything okay?" Bob called, walking up to him. Nick ran a hand through his head and sighed, his eyes watering. He shook it away, trying to be strong in front of his father.

"Celine was kidnapped the other day, dad." he said simply as he looked at his feet.

"I'm sorry to hear that, is there anything that I can do?"

Nick shook his head, feeling his father's hand on his back.

"Mom was upset when she heard too." he replied.

"You spoke to your mother? You are better off without her in your life, Nickolas. Jane Carter is not to be trusted. Especially after all she did to you and Aaron."

"She apologized dad. We talked and she wants to be a family." Nick said, his stomach feeling sick. He had felt fine until they talked about Jane.

"Well, you are an adult now, I respect your decision....but please be careful." Bob cautioned. His brown eyes fell on the bear in Nick's hand.

"I haven't seen that bear since you were a baby...where did you get it?" he smiled. Nick stared at him, his eyebrow raised.

"This was in Celine's crib when she went missing. How can it be mine?"

"I'd know Buttons anywhere. You never went anywhere without it. See the eye? You cried something terrible when the neighbor's kid tore it off." Bob explained. Nick's eyes snapped open....but there was no way.....not after all he and Jane had talked about....

"Oh my god....Dad you don't think Mom took her?" he gasped, dropping the bear.



All he could think about was what his father told him after the car accident.....

"Your Mom wanted a baby girl but she got you instead...."



"Nick, I wouldn't put it past her." Bob replied, noticing his son's expression. Nick looked like a deflated balloon, holding his chest with one hand and his head with the other.

"No...."

"She wanted a girl, and you had what she wanted. Of course she would take advantage of your kindness." Bob added.

Nick felt sick to his stomach....he doubled over and vomited into the shrubs.....until he had nothing left and broke down sobbing. Bob did his best to comfort his son, but Nick just kept blaming himself.

"It's all my fault, Dad. I let her into my life....I am such an idiot." he said.

"No, you're not. You had good intentions, but now I think this is a matter for the police to handle, don't you?"

"Yes....thanks for coming, Dad. I'll be in touch." Nick said slowly, an idea forming in his head. He had to make it up to Amanda, had to fix the mess he made.

"Please call the police." Bob begged. Nick promised him he would and closed the door as Amanda walked around the corner.

"Baby?"
Nick almost jumped out of his skin, shouting.

"Jesus, you scared me." he whispered, clutching his chest.

"You all right?" Amanda asked. Nick felt his stomach churning again and told her he didn't feel well, so he went to lie down. Just before he did so, he called the number his mother had given him, his heart pounding.


"The party you are trying to reach has been disconnected or is no longer in service."

"Goddamn it!!!!" Nick shouted angrily. This pretty much confirmed his suspicion. Nick's mind raced, wondering what he should do. There was only one thing he could do.



That afternoon, Nick managed to talk Amanda into leaving Bryan with AJ just to come to rehearsals....to get her mind off of things for a little while. Amanda was stubborn, but with some gentle pleading Nick got her to go to the club. He waited until after she left, promising to meet her there after taking a shower. However, when he got in the car...all he could think about was Jane. Why had she come back into his life just for this? Was everything a lie just to get to Celine? Nick remembered during her time at the house how she kept looking at their family portrait on the wall. The portrait did not include Bryan yet as Amanda wanted to wait until he was a bit older to get a new picture taken.

Nick remembered the way his mother looked at the baby girl in his wife's arms....her cold stare. He knew now what she had been thinking and he felt sick all over again. He knew how stupid he had been, and as he sat at the traffic light his concience ate at him.



"It's your fault. You're to blame...."

Nick turned the steering wheel and sighed as the light changed, hoping to God he was making the right choice.




Amanda waited at the club, tapping her foot as she looked at the door anxiously. She already hated leaving Bryan at home and now Nick was running late.

"I am sure he is fine, boss. You know how your husband is." Skye, Nick's drummer said. Usually she would be cracking jokes, but after Nick's car accident several months ago she knew it wasn't appropriate. She saw the look of worry on Amanda's face.

"That's the problem....I do know how he is and it worries me. I have a really bad feeling." Amanda told her, feeling herself shiver. She had told Brian a few days ago to keep an eye on her husband because she knew he wanted to go after Celine, to look for their little girl. Part of her hoped he was doing that now. Amanda had called Nick's phone but it kept going to voicemail. The last time this happened, was when Nick was in a car accident.....in a coma for two days. The sinking feeling in her stomach told her this was not just him running late. He always called. Always.


"Rehearsal is canceled for today." Amanda said tearfully when she decided he wasn't coming. She rushed home and held Bryan....letting the tears flow as she clung to her only link to Nick she had now...wondering where in the world he was and if he was all right.

Nick sat in the driveway, looking up at his mother's house with a sinking feeling in his stomach. He knew he was walking right into a possible trap, he knew very well this could be the worst mistake he could make....but Nick didn't care. His daughter, his and Amanda's....was inside of this house. He worried if she was okay....if she was hurt or scared and it killed him to know his mother had her. The woman that had tried to kill him by starvation at 15, the woman that had broken his arm and beaten him senseless...she had Celine. His blood boiled at the thought.�

"It's now or never. This is no time to be a chicken shit." Nick coached himself as he got out of the car. His body was trembling as he went up the porch steps....it didn't seem anyone was home. The house was dark, or so it appeared to be. With each step he took he felt the fear rising to the surface, the fear he had locked away so many years ago. What did he have to be afraid of? Nick knew how to defend himself now, and he knew he could get help if he needed it. Unfortunately, he was far from home and didn't tell anyone where he was going. He went into the house using a window he found open and stepped inside, there were boxes. countless boxes as if someone was preparing to move.�

"Daddy?"�

Nick's heart nearly stopped when he heard her voice. How did she know he was there?�

"Yes, baby...." he said softly. He found her without much trouble, sitting in a playpen in the living room. There was no furniture around, unlike last time he had been here. Nick smiled at his daughter and bent down to pick her up as she reached up for him. He held her and kissed her face as she smiled, her small arms wrapped around his neck.�

"I got you sweetheart. Let's go home." he whispered. He turned around but stopped when he saw Jane.

"Stop right there. You really thought it would be that easy to waltz in here and take my daughter?" she said coldly without emotion.�

"Your daughter? Celine belongs to me and my wife. How dare you?" Nick asked. He felt Celine trembling and all he wanted to do was get her home, he knew how frightened she was. It was then he was reminded Celine was never in danger, Jane Carter wanted a girl......he was only abused because was a boy.

"Put her down now or I will call the police and have you removed." Jane said sternly. Nick held Celine closer, her face buried in his shoulder.

"No, Daddy." she begged.�

"You do realize if you do that they'll arrest you and not me? Let us go." Nick said, his feet planted firnly in front of the playpen. Jane cackled.....just cackled at him. Laughed as if he told the most hilarious joke she'd ever heard. It was then that Nick's eyes widened.....she had a gun. She held the gun as if it was second nature to her, and Celine was practically choking him....she started to cry. Nick tried to sush her as Jane walked over to them. She pressed the gun against his temple, Nick gasping.�

"Please don't hurt her. You can do whatever you want to me but don't hurt her." he begged.�

"Then put my daughter down and step away from the playpen or I will shoot you."�

Nick nodded and kissed Celine on the forehead, her tear filled eyes looking up at him.�

"I'm so sorry baby." he whispered.�

"NO DADDY." she protested. He managed to pry her off of him and set her down before Jane struck him, hitting him across the head. He fell, Celine crying out as she watched her father being hit.�

"Daddy is okay, baby girl." he reassured her.�

"Get away from her." Jane shouted. She held the gun up again. Nick refused to move so she kicked him hard in the side, knocking the wind out of him swiftly. Nick wheezed a bit, his breath catching in his throat, but moved as his mother advanced on him.�

"Please don't hurt me in front of Celine...she doesn't need to see that." he begged, looking up at her. Jane stared hard and just laughed again.

"It will show her that I am in charge."

Nick fished in his pocket for his phone but his pockets were empty, having left it in the car. All he could think about was getting hold of Brian. Jane neared him, cocking the gun....Nick closed his eyes.....

"DROP THE WEAPON!!!"

Nick's eyes snapped open and he saw Brian standing in the doorway, holding his own gun up.

"I said, DROP THE WEAPON!!!" he shouted again. Jane lunged forward and grabbed Nick, holding him as a shield in front of her. Celine was crying in the playpen.

"Bri....Brian.....please..." Nick begged shakily, feeling the cold gun barrel against his face again.

"I told you to drop the fucking weapon, Jane. Put him down...NOW." Brian demanded. He meant business, his face twisted with rage.

Nick was shaking, struggling to get free from his mother's grip but he felt helpless.

"Get Celine out of here...." Nick begged, crying. He didn't know what else to do.

"I'm not leaving you. Back away from him, Jane. I'm warning you." Brian said sternly. He aimed at Jane, who hid behind her human shield. Brian raised his weapon, she pressed further into his temple.

"Please, mom....you don't want to do this. You said you wanted to be a family....you..."

She hit him across the face.

"You've always been a fool, Nickolas. Gullible and foolish. I got what I wanted and now I have no more use for you." she said as he blinked through tears. Why couldn't he move? He was stronger than her, but he stayed still.

"Let him go!!!"

Brian knew Nick didn't have much time left if this continued, he watched carefully and aimed, his hands trembling slightly. Sweat dripped down his face as he pulled the trigger....the shot ringing out....


"NO!!!!"


Brian didn't want to open his eyes to see the result.

Chapter 27




"NICK!!!" Brian screamed after the shot was fired. He watched as Nick fell backwards and then lay there, he ran but it seemed to be in slow motion. Jane Carter was laying on the ground, her son on top of her....a pool of blood forming underneath them.

"Nick?" Brian called again, and he hated himself. Why did he have to shoot when Jane was using him as a shield? He could hear Celine crying, wailing from the playpen on the other side of the room. She was calling for her daddy. Brian stood over Nick, his breath catching in his throat.

"Nick, are you okay? Answer me....."

"Holy shit, what the hell did you do that for? I feel like I got hit by a truck." Nick muttered, and Brian sighed with releif, falling to his knees. He wiped his eyes as Nick sat up, perfectly fine. Nick blinked and looked confused as to why his friend was tearing up....but his heart began pounding. Where was his mother? Nick stood up shakily and turned around fearing the worst.....and they were confirmed.

"Mom?"

Jane Carter was dead.

"Nick, the important thing is that you and Celine are all right......that woman was a monster. I had to...I had to shoot her or she was going to kill you......" Brian started, but Nick ignored him. Nick kept flashing back to the day Tracy had passed, the blood covering the cruise ship deck...staining his clothes...her motionless body laying in front of him. Even though this woman was nowhere near the mother she should have been....Nick began sobbing. He didn't even know why he was crying, Jane had tried to kill him, had decieved him to steal his daughter....but the tears fell heavily and without stopping as Brian held him.

"She's dead and it's my fault..."

Brian ended up spending about an hour calming him down, and Nick lost it again when the people came to remove his mother's body. Nick felt broken, just like the night Tracy had died. The guilt was pressing down on him like a boulder on his back.....the fact that he didn't love his mother and never got to reconcile with her before she passed. Just like Tracy. It was happening all over again and as soon as Brian and Nick went outside, Nick began to throw up, emptying the contents of his stomach into the bush near the front porch. Brian held Celine and tried to keep her facing away from her father...he felt she had seen enough for the day.

"You all right? That gash on your head looks pretty bad. You might have a concussion, that's probably why you threw up so much." Brian offered once they got Celine into Nick's car.

"Yeah....I just feel awful....I mean, my mom is dead, Bri." Nick said in a hollow voice, wiping his eyes and sighing. His head was throbbing and he could feel the dried blood clotting from being struck by the gun barrel.

"That woman was not a mother to anyone, I know it hurts to hear....but she didn't deserve you or your brother....she was a horrible person." Brian told him.
"She's still my mom."

"I know, Nick. I'm sorry for being so out of line. I was just trying to protect you and Celine. Honestly I think I should drive you to the hospital, you can't take a risk with your head hurting so much. We should get Celine checked out too." Brian said, and Nick nodded in agreement before they moved Celine to the other car. Nick just wanted to bring Celine and himself home to Amanda, he knew she must be beside herself with worry at this point, not hearing from him for almost a whole night. It was pretty late but they made a stop at the hospital where Nick found he indeed had a mild concussion. Celine was perfectly healthy to everyone's relief, and after Nick was discharged, they made their way back to Miami.....Nick watching the world pass by as they went. It had been a long night and alll he wanted was to go back in time and stop himself from ever calling his mother.....it was his fault she was gone now, and he would have to live with that.





Amanda held her son close as she sat up in the armchair of the living room, she couldn't sleep but Bryan was passed out, leaning on her chest. She worried where Nick was, if he would ever come home...and about Celine. The little boy in her arms breathed softly, she could feel his heartbeat as she held him. Ever since Celine had vanished from her crib, Amanda kept a close eye on her baby boy.....making sure nothing would happen....but Nick was missing.
When the door opened Amanda held the baby tight, hearing footsteps in the house. Were they coming back for Bryan?


"Amanda?"



Nick's voice was the best thing she had heard all day until she saw what he was holding.

"Look who I brought, baby..." he whispered as he took Bryan from her. Amanda began kissing her daughter's face, crying tears of joy as the four of them went upstairs.
They put the children to bed and Amanda finally noticed Nick's head wrapped in bandages.

"How did you...."

"Baby, before I begin let me tell you how sorry I am for not listening to you. I've been so stupid..."




Nick told her everything, from talking to Jane.....to her being the one who kidnapped Celine and how he figured it out and went after her. Amanda sat in silence, listening. She finally spoke after he poured everything out to her.

"You can't blame yourself, honey. You just wanted your family back and I understand that....but you shouldn't have run off like that to find her. I was worried sick about you. How did you hurt your head? Are you all right? What about Celine...." Amanda started, and Nick just smiled at her. It was a sad smile, his eyes filled with tears as his heart ached.

"Celine is fine baby." he whispered as she kissed him on the cheek.

"So why are you crying then?" she asked. He told her the rest of the story, how Brian shot her to protect him. She rubbed his back, held him as he cried but Amanda strongly disliked Jane Carter for abusing Nick and Aaron. She felt horrible for feeling this way, but she understood why Nick was upset.

"Nicky, please don't take this the wrong way, but maybe this is for the best. After all, your mom was not a nice person. She did a lot of bad things...she hurt you and Aaron. You're better off with her not being in your lives."

Nick cried harder, burying his face in her shoulder. His head throbbed and his chest was tight, his stomach was doing somersaults.He knew his wife was right, but deep down, Jane was still his mother.

"She was still my mom. What do I tell Aaron? I feel horrible...if I'd never went to get Celine she would still be alive. Just like if I never went to Aruba and talked to Tracy...or if I'd taken your offer to run away with you.....she'd be alive too. I'm to blame....."

Amanda just let him keep rambling under his breath, there was no convincing him that he was wrong. Nick had a habit of wallowing when he was upset like this, so she held him that night as they lay in bed together, listening to him cry himself to sleep. It had been a long day and she couldn't wait for it to be over.
They'd figure out what to do about Aaron at another time.



Amanda had insisted they check Celine with the pediatrition one more time, she didn't trust Jane at all. However nothing was found wrong with their baby, she was perfectly healthy. Nick told her his mother wouldn't have harmed Celine since she was a girl, but Amanda would have none of it.

"I don't trust that woman, Nick."

Nick went silent after that and that was the end of the conversation.

When they got home, Aaron was sitting at the kitchen table, making a sandwich.


"When did you get home? You were gone yesterday." the boy asked. Nick felt his stomach churn as he walked into the room and grabbed a can of Sprite out of the refridgerator.

"I was out for a few hours." he lied. His brother made a face, watching Amanda carry Celine upstairs.

"The police found her?"

"Aaron, you and I need to have a talk. Come on, let's walk down the beach." Nick offered. The two of them walked down the beach for a bit and sat down on the large rock Nick usually meditated on when he was upset. '


"So how did they find Celine? Did they catch the person who took her?" Aaron asked. Nick kept seeing his mother laying on the ground, blood under her....he felt so guilty.

"I found her, Aaron. It was Mom who took her.....I found them in Orlando." he explained, his voice tight. Aaron didn't seem to react, he just shook his head.

"Mom will never learn, will she? I guess she's in jail then?" he said calmly.

"Not exactly." Nick replied. He felt himself tear up and Aaron looked at him with concern. Nick didn't want to tell him, but he had to know.

"Mom was shot.....when I went to get Celine she held me hostage and tried to use me as a human shield from the police. She had a gun to my head."


Aaron's mouth hung open in suprise. Not the reaction Nick wanted.

"I'm glad you and Celine are okay. So is she in the hospital?"

"No." Nick said, the tears falling freely.

"Why wouldn't she be at the hospital, Nick? She's okay isn't she?"

Nick cried silently, trying to get out what he needed to tell his brother. He wiped his eyes and sighed, the waves crashing on the beach in front of them.

"Mom passed away, Aaron. They couldn't save her....the bullet killed her. If they hadn't shot her, I would have died." he explained softly. Aaron shook his head, whispering and all Nick wanted to do was hold him, but when he went to do so, the boy shoved him.

"You let her die? Nick, how could you let Mom die? You just stood there and let it happen?" the boy shouted, crying.

"That's not what happened, kiddo."

"I know she wasn't a nice person, but she didn't deserve to be shot, Nick!!! How could you let them hurt her?" Aaron snapped. Nick tried to put his hands on his shoulders, but Aaron shoved them away again.

"Don't hug me. You're a horrible person.....I can't believe you'd just sat and watched her die." Aaron yelled. Nick winced at his little brother's words, wanting nothing more than to crawl under the rock and just die there. Aaron started walking away towards the house, and Nick followed.

"She was going to kill me, Aaron. They had to......."

"Get away from me!!! I hate you!!"


Aaron ran into the house and slammed the screen door behind him.....Nick followed shortly after, wiping his eyes as Amanda looked on with a concerned look on her face. She held him and rubbed his back as he cried into her shoulder again.

"I guess you told him, didn't you?"

"He said he hates me and that I let her die....and I'm a horrible person. He's right." Nick whispered.

"That is not true, baby. He's just upset. Give him some time...he'll be fine." she offered.

"You don't understand because you didn't like her, Amanda. She was our mother and she's dead now. She didn't deserve to die....even though she tried to hurt us. She deserved prison...not death. I wish I could make it up to Aaron but I don't know how." Nick said, sitting down as Amanda handed him another Sprite.

"Maybe talk to your dad? I am sure he can think of something. Just leave Aaron alone for now. He needs some time to think about things....everyone deals with death differently." she said as she put a hand on his shoulder. Nick sipped at his can and nodded....thinking about calling Bob later.



Nick and his father ended up holding a private funeral for Jane a few days later. She was buried in the cemetary just outside of town, a place surrounded by trees. It was very peaceful and only the three Carter boys were present, along with Amanda. Nick was silent most of the day but he stayed strong for his brother. They all were solemn and didn't say much during the ceremony....but Aaron leaned into Nick and seemed to forgive him.


"I'm sorry I yelled at you." he whispered as they sat on a hill overlooking their mother's grave, watching them fill the hole in with dirt. Nick put his arm around his brother, smiling at him.

"I know you don't really hate me. I didn't want her to die either, kiddo. All I wanted was a mother." Nick replied.

"Me too, Nick....me too..." Aaron said. He leaned into Nick's chest and the two of them sat there, feeling the breeze on their faces. They'd been through a lot with their mother, but now it was all over. Nick didn't have to worry about being hurt by her anymore....he had closure.


It was the end of a chapter in his life, and although he was sad.....he knew it was for the best.

After the funeral, things were quiet around the Carter house. Aaron was involved in his schoolwork, AJ was busy at the tattoo shop, Amanda had her hands full at the club and Nick dove head first into writing. It had been a while since he'd worked on anything new and he loved the creative process. As he tapped the pencil on the desk he was writing at in his studio and hummed a tune to himself, his cell phone buzzed in his pocket. It was his manager, Howie.

“Hey, D. What's up?”

“Can you come down to the main office tomorrow morning? There's something we want to talk to you about that I think you'll be quite thrilled to do, it would be a great career move.” Howie asked. Nick frowned. He hoped it wasn't another bribe to do tour dates or something. Nick liked to play at his wife's club. He was close to home and could spend time with his son and daughter….and he saw Amanda every day. He didn't want to change that for anything.

Nick was big on family and it meant more to him than anything since he was orphaned at a young age by his mother who abused him. He had just recently reconciled with his father, who he had believed to be the bad guy for many years. Robert Carter was the nicest man Nick had met and was thankful that Brian had found him.

“All right, Howie. Sounds good. I'll see you in the morning then.” Nick replied before hanging up. His stomach growled and he guessed it was time to stop working and go in the house to find something to eat, he'd been working for almost an entire afternoon and hadn't even had lunch. He turned off the light on the door of the studio that said “Do Not Disturb” in red letters and headed into the house.

“Hi, honey. You're done early…” Amanda said as Nick kissed her on the cheek. Her brown eyes watched him get a bottle of water from the refrigerator and take a long drink.

“Yeah, Howie called and wants to see me tomorrow.”

“He isn't on you about touring again, is he?” Amanda asked, although she knew that was a touchy subject..she tried not to ask many questions about Nick’s conversations with his manager. Howie and Nick had a strange business relationship.

Nick set the water bottle down and kissed Amanda again, his arms at her waist.

“Not at all, baby. It's something else. I'm gonna go down to the office tomorrow and see what it's all about. Want me to start supper?” he asked as he heard a baby crying in the other room. Nick moved to get it but Amanda put her hand on his chest and smiled.

“That's Bryan… I'll get him. He's been cranky today. I tried to get him to nap but he won't stay asleep for more than a half hour.”

“How about this…I'll get him to sleep and you can start supper? I put the chicken to thaw out this morning in the sink.” Nick whispered, kissing her cheek. Amanda looked unsure but Nick knew she needed a break and was happy to oblige. She turned to get supper going as he left the room, heading for the baby’s bedroom. His daughter Celine was on the floor, playing with a doll as he came in.

“Hi, Daddy.” Celine said, looking up at him. He smiled at her and picked up the crying baby, holding him against his chest. He smiled at his children….he'd never pictured himself being a father let alone to a boy and a girl. Bryan clung to him and sniffled into his father's shoulder as Nick bounced him gently. His phone vibrated, and he sighed. Balancing the baby, he took it out of his pocket.

“Hey, you told me to let you know when I was in town. I'm in town for the weekend, let me know when it's good for me to come over.”

Nick had completely forgotten about the surprise he'd been planning for Amanda, who was a huge New Kids On The Block fan. It was almost her birthday and as a surprise Nick was going to have the band come and sing to her on stage during his set. Nick had met Donnie Wahlberg a few times at awards shows and finally exchanged numbers. He knew that this would make his wife very happy and it had been a huge challenge keeping it a secret, he hadn't told anyone.. Not even AJ.. AJ was horrible at keeping secrets.

After putting Bryan back in his crib, Nick kissed Celine and went to find Amanda in the kitchen, grabbing her butt playfully as he walked past her. She giggled, stirring the pasta on the stove. Nick leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

“What took you so long?”

“Oh, the baby was just fussy.” Nick said. He sat at the table and began to help chop some vegetables for the salad. Just then, Aaron came in with Michelle, their dog.

“Nick, did you ever find out if…oh.. Never mind.” the teenager said, noticing Nick's expression. Amanda looked puzzled, putting a hand on her hip and then smiling.

“What are you up to?”

Nick smiled sheepishly and set the knife down, sighing. He had sort of told Aaron what he was up to but not all of it.

“You look beautiful today.” he said, grinning at her and gazing longingly. She picked up the loaf of bread and playfully hit him with it. He dodged, heading to the other side of the counter.

“Don't think I'm letting you off the hook, mister.” she said, patting him on the ass as he walked by.

Nick laughed at Amanda's expression and caught her small smile, he knew she liked his humor.



The next morning, Nick went into Howard Dorough’s office, wondering what the urgency was. He sat in the waiting room for a while before Howie’s secretary showed him in. The office was on the 15th floor of a Miami high rise and had a amazing view of downtown. It was decorated in black and purple right down to the carpeting and walls.

“So what did you want me to come down here for?” Nick asked as he walked into the room, but he stopped when he saw a young woman sitting at the desk across from his manager. She got up and smiled, holding out her hand to shake his.

“It's so great to meet you, Nick. I have been a long time fan. I'm Savannah.”

She looked a lot like Amanda but her figure was a bit fuller. Amanda was lean, but this girl had curves. Nick caught his eyes wandering and stopped himself to remind himself he had a wife and two children at home.

“Howie, I can meet fans anytime. What is this about?”

Savannah and Howie laughed.

“Nick, this is not just a fan. She was signed to the label recently and we thought you'd like to mentor her.”

Nick nodded, not sure about this idea. The girl was beautiful. It made him uneasy.

“Mentor?”

“She's a new artist.. I thought it would be great for your image to help new artists. Like JC Chasez did for you when you moved to LA. You told me a few months ago about it and it gave me the idea.”

Nick wanted to smack him. He knew if Amanda saw Savannah she would immediately distrust him. He smiled and gave a quick nod, and Howie continued talking. He discussed recording among other things but Nick wasn't listening, he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

Let me know when you'd like to talk more about the thing we discussed.

It was from Donnie. Nick replied back and pretended to listen to what his manager was saying but he found his mind going off in another direction. He wanted Amanda's birthday to be perfect and hoped she wouldn't find out the surprise before it was time.



“I gotta know what he is up to, AJ.” Amanda said, sitting down on the couch across from him with the baby, as Bryan giggled. He was getting bigger by the day and was the spitting image of his father.

“Well, I can't help you….I'm out of the loop.”

“He's just being so sneaky, and then there were those weird calls the other night that he wouldn't answer.” Amanda frowned.

AJ chuckled, turning on the TV and sipping at the drink he'd just picked up off the coffee table.

“Maybe he's cheating on you.”

Amanda and AJ stared at each other and then started laughing.

“He'd never. After everything he did to get me. He'd never do it. You're crazy, Jay.”

“It was just a joke. You and I both know he wouldn't. That man doesn't have a unfaithful bone in his body.”

Amanda laughed again but deep down, that nagging feeling something was going on wouldn't go away. Nick was hiding something and she was going to find out.

Nick played with some knobs on the control panel in his home studio, working on a mix of the track he was currently doing. The vocals were coming together great and he was getting happy with the result. He'd been working on a new album without telling anyone and jotted don't lyrics when he thought of them.

“Hey, Nick….it's me.” he heard Howie’s voice over the intercom. Nick thought this was strange, Howie usually never came to the house.

“Sure I'll buzz you in.” he said, clicking the button off.

Howie entered with a young girl, she was very good looking with brown curly hair that fell in ringlets.

“You brought Savannah with you.”

“Well yes. I told you I would bring her by, don't you remember?” Howie said, noticing that Nick was not entirely pleased with her presence.

Amanda was home and Nick worried that she would think something was going on, and he had no idea that he was correct. She began questioning him as soon as he entered the kitchen.



“Who's car is that in the driveway?” Amanda asked, noticing the strange vehicle parked next to Nick's.

“Oh, it was only Howie.”

“He never comes to the house. You should have invited him in for dinner….I haven't seen him in ages.”

Amanda went on to chopping up tomatoes while Nick helped set the table.

“He just came by for a bit to talk about a couple of things.” Nick said. Amanda stopped cutting and looked at him skeptically as his phone started to ring.

“Hello? Uh…can I talk to you a bit later? I'm helping my wife with dinner. Uh huh. Yeah. Sounds great. Okay. Bye.”

“Who was that?”

Nick smiled at her and put his phone away. It had been Donnie Wahlberg, who had horrible timing. He had wanted to discuss the surprise. Obviously Nick couldn't do this when she was in the room so he immediately thought of a lie.

“Oh, that was JC. He wanted to ask me if I got the song lyrics he emailed me this morning for something we are working on for the new album. I was gonna tell you during dinner and surprise you but I've been working on new music.” he said. This wasn't a complete lie but he thought it would hold Amanda over for now. He was relieved when she came over to kiss him.

“That's so great you're working on new music, baby. I can't wait to hear it.” she replied. Nick nodded, it had definitely been a long time since he'd worked on anything new, not since Tracy had passed away after their wedding. He'd been writing some songs and feeling inspired in the studio. Experimenting with new sound and writing made him feel at peace. He just didn't want Amanda to know about Savannah because he knew what she'd say. Hating himself for thinking about the girl again, he went to chopping some carrots to stop thinking about it.


***********

“Thanks for meeting me here, Donnie. Sorry I cut you off earlier on the phone….my wife was in the room and I didn't want to spoil anything.”

Donnie Walhberg smiled at him from where he sat at the bar. They'd gone out for a couple of beers after Nick finished dinner and putting the kids to bed. He told Amanda he was meeting Howie and she believed it. He didn't like to lie to his wife but he wanted to have this surprise for her birthday.

“No problem, Nick. So what did you have in mind?”

Nick smiled and sipped at his beer. He couldn't wait for his wife to see what he'd been planning.




Amanda had just finished putting Celine to bed and was picking up some toys on the floor when the house phone began to ring. She left the kids room and went to answer it, surprised that someone would call that late.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Amanda it's Howie.”

Her eyes narrowed, now suspicious because Nick had told her he was going out with Howie.

“Why are you looking for Nick, isn't he with you?” she asked.

“No, he's not with me. I'm at the office…I was just seeing if he would come by in the morning to go over some promo stuff for the shoot we did last week.”

“He's not home, he's out but I'll tell him that you called.” Amanda promised. She hung up the phone and continued with what she was doing. Nick finally came home about an hour later, kissing her on the cheek.

“Want to run a bath before bed? I've hardly seen you today.” he whispered into her ear. She returned the kiss. Amanda reasoned that she had no reason to think Nick was cheating on her, but he was definitely up to something though.

“Sure, baby. The kids are in bed already. Hope you had a good time out.”

“I did. Just went over a few things.”

They undressed and poured some wine, and got into the large bathtub in the bathroom. Nick dimmed the lights. The hot water was very relaxing.

“Are you okay? You seem tense.”

Amanda stopped sipping at her wine and thought for a moment, how did he always know when something was bothering her? She was usually the one trying to get him to open up about his feelings and now it was his turn.

“Just thinking about some things with the club.” she lied.

Nick began to kiss her on the neck, in the corner where her neck and shoulder met.

“Well, whatever it is I'm sure it will work out. Just need to relax baby. It's almost your birthday.”

He moved up her neck, to her ear and made her shudder with pleasure. Amanda hated that he turned her on so much sometimes, she had completely forgotten what she wanted to talk to him about. The gentle kisses soon turned into a full on makeout session, lasting until the bubbles in the tub had long ago faded. Amanda left the tub feeling very relaxed indeed. She realized what he had done and shook her head, smiling at his naked body.

“How do you do that?” she asked, watching Nick putting on his underwear from across the room. He looked up at her quizzically.

“Do what?”

Nick put on a white tank top and climbed into bed, kissing her on the cheek before throwing the sheet over himself.

“Make me forget whatever is bothering me.”

Nick smiled and chuckled.

“Just talented, I guess.”

They both went to bed, Amanda thinking how she was going to find out the truth about what her husband was up to.

The truth would eventually come to light.

Nick walked into the kitchen and made sure Amanda wasn't home before pulling out his phone to call Donnie and find out when he was free. He'd been trying to get a hold of him but Donnie was busy, and Nick was frustrated.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

The phone fell to the floor with a loud clatter as AJ came around the corner, laughing at Nick's expression.

“Shit, AJ. You scared the crap out of me.”

“What are you up to?”

Nick put the phone back into his pocket, walking to the refrigerator as if he hadn't been doing anything.

“Nothing,”

“You're full of shit, Nick. I've known you long enough to know when you're lying.”

Nick bent down to get something from the refrigerator, and his phone dropped out of his pocket just as a text appeared on the screen. Before he could grab it, AJ snatched it.

“AJ, give it back!!!” Nick said, dropping the can of soda he was holding. It popped open and sprayed, but Nick ignored it because he was desperately trying to grab for his cell phone.

“Who's Savannah, and why is she coming by tomorrow?” AJ asked, holding the phone out of Nick's reach.

“First of all, give me that. Secondly, Savannah is a singer I am mentoring. Howie set it up. Third…give me my phone.” Nick demanded, grabbing again. AJ let him have it and Nick went to work cleaning up the spill.

“Does your wife know about this Savannah chick?” AJ asked. He knew Nick wouldn't cheat but knew how Amanda was as well. She was already suspicious and this didn't help any. Nick had the tendency of making bad decisions and he just didn't want to see his friend screw up this marriage after working so hard to get here.

Nick sighed and got another soda from the bottom drawer, closing the refrigerator with his foot once he was done cleaning. The floor would be sticky, but he'd get it later.

“Why are you making it out like I'm cheating or something? After everything I went through to be with Amanda, do you think I'd be that stupid? Come on. Savannah is just someone I'm mentoring. Like how JC mentored me. That's it.” he said, making a face.

“Oh, I trust you. I just don't trust this girl. You should tell Amanda, because you know how she is. She'll see this strange chick at your studio and think y'all are fucking or something.” AJ said, looking around to make sure Aaron and the swear jar weren't around. Nick laughed at him and set the can down.

“I was gonna invite her for dinner so she can meet the family anyway.. I just wanted to show her the recording studio tomorrow and see where she wants to go with her music career. That's what JC did for me. Howie set this whole thing up, I think he knows what he's doing.”

Then why did it seem like AJ might be onto something? He didn't have interest in Savannah, but was she interested in him? He'd have to find out. They hadn't really gotten to talking outside of the meeting with Howie.

All Nick could think about through dinner that night was how relieved that it wasn't Donnie Wahlberg texting him about the birthday party.


The next morning, Amanda was getting ready to go to the club and Nick was making Aaron's lunch for school.

“I'll see you later?” she asked, knowing he'd be by for band rehearsal later.

AJ stood in the doorway, listening as he drank his coffee. He and Nick exchanged looks.

“Sure, baby…”

Nick kissed her on the cheek and she picked up her purse, heading out the door to the car. AJ coughed, motioning for Nick to go after her but he didn't.

“You didn't tell her, you idiot!!!”

“Fuck. I forgot! Oh, fuck. Aaron! Come on…” Nick hissed as his brother came into the room with the swear jar, shaking it. He silently cursed again, knowing Aaron had heard him swear.

“Pay up…” he said, smiling.

“Aw come on!”

Aaron shook the jar in reply, it had quite a bit of money in it.

“Might I remind you, this was your idea?” AJ chuckled. Nick looked sourly at the lunchbox he had just finished with and handed it to his brother, they too headed to the garage so Nick could bring his brother to school.




Later that afternoon, Nick was helping Lisa put the babies down for a nap when the doorbell rang.

“Want me to get it?” Lisa offered. Nick was holding Bryan, who was being fussy.

“No, I can get it…why don't you take Mr. Cranky Butt here? He's giving me a hard time. I will get the door.”

Nick knew it was Savannah, who'd come over to see the studio before Nick went to rehearsals for the day. He was really happy that AJ was not home because he didn't need any more comments like this morning.

“Hi, Savannah. I am glad you found the house all right. I know you came last time with Howie but you found it on your own.” he said with a smile. She smiled back and batted her eyelashes at him.

“No problem at all. I have a good memory.”

Nick made his way to the back of the property, where his personal recording studio was. He felt bad having her there without Amanda knowing…especially since Amanda herself had never been inside. He wondered then why he'd never invited her to come into the studio and that it would make a great date night.

“Nick, are you okay?”

Nick snapped out of his thoughts to find his hand on the doorknob and himself just standing there looking dazed.

“Sorry, I was just thinking about something…”

“You sound stressed. Are you sure this is a good time for you?” Savannah asked, following him inside. She watched carefully as Nick closed the door and coughed. He was flustered, which was exactly what she intended to happen.

“No, no. Everything is fine. I promise. So do you wanna tell me a bit about your music?”

Savannah smiled…it was all going according to plan.

Amanda was busily getting things ready at the nightclub, checking over everything and prepping for the band to rehearse that afternoon. She loved running the club, it was something Nick had given her but she did all the work herself and she felt a sense of accomplishment about it all. It was not the hottest club in the area but it was still very successful. As she did paperwork, her phone buzzed with a text. and she picked it up.

“Did you get a new car and not tell me, lol?"



Why would Brian ask something so silly? Amanda laughed, thinking he was playing a joke on her.


“No, why???”

“There's a weird car in your driveway.”


Amanda sat for a moment, thinking. Maybe it was someone there to meet with Nick. It didn't mean anything.

“I'm sure it's nothing.”

“I'll keep an eye out.”


Amanda set the phone down and continued her work, trying to keep herself from thinking something was off with her husband. Nick wouldn't screw around. He wasn't like that.

There was nothing to worry about.


“Don't you have to leave for rehearsal soon?” Savannah asked when Nick had finished showing her some stuff in the recording studio. He'd just gotten done recording some vocals and shown her how he edited it, the production side of things. She was fascinated by the way he explained everything. His voice was so calming.

“Oh, you're right. Would you like to come and see my rehearsal? I'm sure my wife won't mind you being there.”

“She is really lucky to have someone like you.” Savannah smiled.

“I've known my wife since we were ten. So I guess I'm the lucky one, not her.”

She didn't really want to meet Amanda, but Savannah figured that if Nick wanted that to happen she might as well. She drove over to the club behind Nick, following him and thinking the whole time what it would be like to date him. She could really put her foot in the music industry with a boyfriend that was already famous. Nick probably could help her a lot. Howie had told her some of the things that mentoring could do for her and she liked it. Getting to know Nick Carter was just the tip of things.

She wanted the whole enchilada.


“Wow, baby. You're a half hour early.” Amanda joked when she saw Nick walk into the club. He usually ran late or came right on time so for him to be early and with coffee it was a surprise. He handed her a latte that he'd bought her and kissed her on the cheek.

“I brought by a guest, is that okay?”

Amanda sipped her coffee, it was a hazelnut latte just the way she liked it. Nick almost always brought her a coffee when he came to rehearsal..

“Sure. Did you invite fans again like last week? Cause if you did, you'll have to-”

Amanda stopped joking when Savannah walked in. She was beautiful. Young and brunette wearing nice clothes that accentuated certain areas. Amanda completely trusted Nick but for some reason her guard was up right away.

Savannah saw the smile slide off Amanda's face as she walked into the room and had to stop herself from giggling. She had made Amanda Carter very uncomfortable and she loved every moment of it.

“This is Savannah. I'm mentoring her…Howie set it up because he saw how things worked out between JC and me and he wants me to give back to newer artists. Savannah just got signed to the same label I'm on.”

Amanda set her coffee down and shook Savannah’s hand…it was like ice just like her stare. She could tell this girl did not like her at all.

“Nice to meet you,” Savanah said.

“Nick, can I borrow you for a second? In the office?”

Nick nodded and followed her into the office…very confused. He could tell there was tension but didn't know why.

“Nick-”

“I'm sorry that I didn't tell you she was coming, but I thought it would be nice for you to meet her. She was at the studio today and I had to leave so I invited her down to see rehearsal.” he said once the door was closed.

No wonder Brian saw a strange car at the house today. It was her.

“Wait. She was at the house? Nick, I don't mind if she is working with you but you could have told me.”

“I'm sorry, baby. I just thought of it kind of last minute. I didn't mean to upset you or anything.”

This was not a full lie but he knew he should have listened to AJ.

“That's okay, just next time tell me because I don't want the neighbors to get ideas. I already had Brian ask me who's car was in the driveway. You know he looks out when I'm not home because he cares about the kids. Just be more careful.” Amanda said, relieved that Nick was telling her the truth. This was something she liked about Nick, he knew he was a terrible liar.

Nick leaned down and kissed her on the cheek, holding her waist with his hand.

“I'm just glad you're not upset with me.”

“No, but I don't think Savannah likes me very much.” Amanda said as she kissed him back.

Nick laughed, relaxing his shoulders.

“I think you're just imagining it. She's a nice girl. She's got a great voice too. You should hear her sing. I think she's got it in her to blow up the radio big time, she just has to get her foot in the door.” he said.

The two of them left the office and went out to the stage area again, where the band was setting up for rehearsal. Savannah watched them, as Nick took the stage and she stood next to Amanda.

“So Nick told me he's mentoring you?” Amanda asked, trying to keep things friendly and making small talk.

“Yes, singing is my dream. I just got signed to the label Nick is on and Howie is also my manager. He thought that Nick could help me start off. Nick is so talented and I feel really happy to work with him.” Savannah said.

“That's great. Nick will definitely help you out, he's very good at what he does.”

“I'm looking forward to seeing for myself. I've been dreaming of this since I was little.”

As they talked, Amanda couldn't help but wonder if that was all Savannah was after.

As Amanda's birthday got nearer, Nick went full on into planning mode. He knew he wanted a specific theme and who would be invited but he also needed to work out more details, especially with Donnie and setting it up at the club. Doing this was going to be a huge challenge because Amanda owned the club and he didn't want her to know anything. So most of it was kept secret.

“Hey, honey- you're still okay with me using the club for my fan event that night next month, right?” Nick asked one morning at breakfast. The party wasn't long away, maybe two weeks. Nick knew he had to hurry if he wanted to put it all together. Donnie was helping with the music portion as his band would be performing for Amanda but the rest of the evening Nick had no clue.

“Of course. I have everything set for that. It's a great idea to do this for them. They'll love it.”

Nick had arranged a fan event for the day before Amanda's birthday and said the event was two days long so she would close the club to the public. She didn't know that the one night was for her birthday party. All Amanda knew was that Nick was planning to do something for her birthday after the event was over. She didn't mind sharing Nick with his fans and knew that it would make the club quite a bit of money.

Nick's other plan was for New Kids On The Block to serenade Amanda on stage for her birthday. He'd been in contact with Donnie for several weeks, trying to get their schedules to work. He was not touring or filming Blue Bloods at the time so it ended up working out great. Everything was starting to come together.

“So is everything set for Amanda's party?” Brian asked as he and Nick ate lunch on the patio. He was off that day and usually hung out with his girlfriend Lisa but had been trying to make time for Nick too.

“I'm working on it. She's starting to get suspicious though. It's hard to keep a secret in this house especially with AJ and my brother being blabbermouths.” Nick said, laughing. He took a bite of his sandwich and set it down. He thought of the party and about Savannah and wondered if Amanda was starting to get the wrong idea about the two of them.

“Brian, did Amanda tell you about the girl I'm mentoring?”

“She mentioned it. I'm sorry about that by the way. I didn't know that was her car at the house. I hope I didn't get you in trouble.” Brian said. Brian noticed that Nick was hanging out with Savannah quite a bit and while he wasn't suspicious he felt like he needed to keep an eye on things anyway.

“It's alright. Savannah is just a friend. Amanda thinks she doesn't like her though. I'm working with her because Howie thinks it would be a good idea to mentor another artist like JC did for me.”

Nick took a drink of soda and looked out at the water, thinking.

“I would be careful with Savannah if I were you.” Brian suggested.

Nick went on to tell Brian about the flirting and how it made him uncomfortable because he was married. Brian raised an eyebrow at some of it but Nick insisted that he didn't feel the same way.

“I'm not attracted to her.” Nick said, but he knew this wasn't fully truthful because she was a very pretty girl. She was just way too young. He didn't have any sexual attraction towards her and wasn't planning on acting on any feelings because he was in love with his wife. He'd spent way too much time to be with her to screw that up now. Savannah was really just a friend. He didn't understand why everyone was trying to make it seem like there was more.

“I believe you. I'm just warning you to be careful. I am sure she is very nice, but you don't know her that well. You don't know what her motives are aside from singing. I'm just looking out for you.” Brian smiled. Nick nodded and decided maybe he'd better find out because he was starting to think about it in depth. When they were alone, Savannah would flirt. Even though he didn't return any of her advances, she needed to be put in her place.

“Maybe I'll have a talk with her.” Nick said.


The next day, Nick invited Savannah over to the house to use the recording studio again. They'd been writing on some songs for her album and he was feeling pretty good about them, but he had to find out what her true motive was.

“Good to see you again, Nick. I brought my guitar.” Savannah said as she walked in the door of Nick's recording studio.

“That's great. Come on in. I just was getting some stuff ready for our session.”

Nick shut the door and turned on the light outside so that the family knew not to disturb him.

“So how are you doing, I know you have been busy with different things lately.” Savannah asked. She set her guitar down and smiled, sitting down on the couch. She liked the recording studio at Nick's house. It was on the beach and very cozy. Like a guest house almost with its own kitchen and sitting area. It was definitely Nick's style.

“Yeah, you could say that.” Nick said with a chuckle. He brought her a soda and sat down opposite from her.

They got to talking about music for a long time before Nick remembered the reason he wanted to talk to her in the first place.

“Are you okay?” Savannah asked suddenly. It caught Nick off guard. She'd never asked him this before.

“Everything's fine. Why do you ask?”

“You seem like you're stressed.”

“I've just been a little busy with work and planning Amanda's birthday party.” Nick said. Savannah moved to the couch where he was sitting and rested her hand on his knee. He shifted.

“If you need anything, I'm here. You just need to relax.” she said, emphasizing the last word. Nick licked his lips, they were suddenly dry. His mouth was dry so he took a drink from the can of soda but it was empty. His tongue felt like he had swallowed a huge wad of cotton.

“I'm not sure what you mean.”

“I can help you relax. You're so tense-”

Her hand traveled so Nick jumped up and went to get himself another drink.

“Did I say something wrong?” she asked.

“I'm not sure what you're trying to do but this is not appropriate.” Nick said. Savannah got up and cornered him in front of the sink.

“Nick, you need to loosen up. Your wife is stressing you out and I can help. You need to have some fun. Let me help you…”

Savannah didn't look fazed so she tried to kiss his neck. Nick pushed her away.

“Savannah, I'm married. I'm mentoring you and that's it. This can't go any further than purely business. I am not interested in sex.”

“Nick-”

“I think you should go.” he said finally. He looked at her and could tell she wasn't happy about it. After she left Nick downed the rest of his drink…sighing. He had just narrowly escaped that situation but somehow he knew things with Savannah were not over.

Lisa loved her job taking care of the Carters children. Being a fan of Nick Carter’s and getting to spend so much time with him was an amazing opportunity for her, not to mention they paid her well for the nanny position. She often missed being just a fan though and would often go online into the message boards on Nick Carter forums to chat with other fans. She never told them who she was and they didn’t ask. Lisa respected Nick’s privacy enough that she didn’t feel the need to expose anything but still liked to keep up with what the fans were thinking. Sometimes Nick would ask her what they were saying or even go on the boards incognito. Nobody knew who he was either. He liked hearing the fans opinions but mostly got entertained by the gossip.


However, today was a bit different as a conversation in the message board caught her eye.

Nickschick1978: Hey who’s that new girl I saw with Nick last week? Is he bored of that idiot he married already?

CartersBitch69: omg who is it?

Nickschick1978: I think he’s got a side hoe. Some girl that looks like she’s 12.


Lisa looked and saw a photo of Nick and Savannah talking outside of his house. The fans had found paparazzi photos and posted it on the forum. Lisa was angry. Not just angry that they were talking about Amanda like this but starting rumors openly. This was typical behavior but not uncommon. A lot of fans were not happy when Nick and Amanda got married. She knew from being around on the forums for so long. She just hoped that Nick didn’t see any of this yet.



Nick knew he’d been so busy with planning the birthday party and working on his album that he hadn’t really spent much alone time with his wife. So he decided to plan a romantic evening for the two of them. He hadn’t done anything like this since their honeymoon so he was so excited. He was busily cooking in the kitchen, waiting for Amanda to come home from the club so he could surprise her when AJ walked in from the garage.

“What’s cooking, good looking?” AJ commented as Nick rolled his eyes. He continued to stir the pot of spaghetti sauce on the stove.

“Nothing for you...I’m surprising Amanda. We’ve been so busy lately that we haven’t had much time alone to ourselves.”

“Trying to make up for the Savannah shit?”

“No, AJ. Amanda wasn’t even angry about that. I had a talk with Savannah and we are keeping it professional after what happened in the recording studio.” Nick explained as he took freshly baked garlic bread out of the oven. He set it on the counter to cool.

“Look, if she tried that crap with me...I would just call off the whole mentoring thing. Your manager obviously didn’t do any check into who she is other than she’s a singer. Are you sure she isn’t a fan or something?”

“She probably is, but what does that have anything to do with her music career? I think she just got the wrong idea about working with me and I told her flat out I’m not interested because I am married. Come on, it’s not like people think we’re sleeping together.” Nick protested as Lisa walked in holding her laptop under her arm. Nick and AJ said their hellos and Nick continued to cook while Lisa sat at the stool in front of the counter next to AJ.

“Nick, I know that I’m just your nanny but I’m also a fan...and I hate to break it to you but the other fans already think that you’re sleeping with Savannah.”

Nick responded by dropping the plate he was holding, the shards hitting the floor in front of him and scattering.

“You're fucking joking..”

“Nick, I wish I was.” Lisa said, pulling out the laptop and placing it on the counter. Nick's mouth hung open as he read the posts on the forum. He thought that he'd put a stop to everything but there the fans were, talking about how he was cheating on his wife.

“I'd never cheat on Amanda.” he said in disbelief.

“Dude, we all know that…but it looks like one of these girls might be her and is posting to get rumors started. She probably wants to upset you.” AJ told him. Nick nodded and went back to getting dinner ready. He didn't know what to do about any of this but he knew it would upset his wife if she saw. All he thought about was when he and Amanda had gotten married, how she would keep saying that the fans were not happy about him getting married to her. He had to assure her so many times that he didn't care what they were saying, but this time he did.

“You’re gonna have to tell Amanda, Nick. She sometimes goes on these forums. She hasn’t in a long time but we were talking about it once. If she sees that, she’s going to be angry.”

Nick agreed with Lisa and waited for Amanda to come home so he could surprise her with dinner. He’d set up a table in his recording studio so nobody would bother them, with the whole room lit by candlelight. It was really nice. He just hated that he had to bring up the Savannah situation at dinner because he’d spent a good amount of time planning this alone time with his wife.

“So this is your studio. Do you always have the candles?” Amanda giggled. She wore a black dress that dipped low in the front and a silver chain that Nick had bought her for Christmas. She looked beautiful as she always did. Nick set up dinner and they began to eat. The food wasn’t anything spectacular, just pasta and garlic bread with red velvet cake for dessert. He’d brought out a bottle of champagne and chilled it ahead of time so it would be ice cold by the time they drank it.

“I feel bad that I waited this long to show it to you and I’m sorry about that.” Nick apologized as he downed the rest of his second glass of champagne.

“It’s alright. I mean, everyone needs a place all to themselves. I guess this is your version of a man cave.” Amanda smiled. Nick seemed a little off today but she didn’t question anything, not wanting to ruin the good time they were having.

“You’ve been working so hard, baby. It’s nice to see you take a night off and relax.” Amanda said suddenly. They spent a long time talking, until the champagne was long gone and they started on the cake. Nick was really proud of this particular cake, he’d never baked a red velvet cake before and hoped it tasted as good as it looked.

“Do you like it?” Nick asked, watching his wife eat. She opened her mouth to compliment him but her eyes caught something on the sofa across the room. It was a small tote bag, a pink one that had a Victoria’s Secret logo on the front.

“Whose bag is that?”

Nick had no clue what she was talking about at first but then he spotted the bag as well and his eyes went wide. Savannah had left her bag on the couch when he’d thrown her out. He knew how bad this looked.

“It must be Savannah’s bag….I can explain-“ Nick started, but Amanda had already gotten up and was clearly upset.

“Nick, it’s bad enough when your fans are telling me you’re hooking up with this girl and I have to keep defending you...but the least you could do is be honest with me. I thought you weren’t going to have her at the house anymore and you invited her here? Your fans aren’t the only ones who think something is going on. Is that why you wanted to show me the studio so bad?”

“Baby….it's not what you think at all…” Nick stammered.

“I trust you, Nick...but I do not trust her. I can’t believe you.”

Amanda headed for the door but Nick got in front of it, stopping her from leaving. He knew she was angry but couldn’t let this happen and had to give himself a chance to explain. He’d worked so hard to get with her that he couldn’t bear to lose her over something that didn’t even happen.

“Nick, I’m really disappointed in you. I’m going to bed.”

He finally let her leave because she just didn’t want to listen to him anymore. As the door closed behind her, Nick looked around at the flickering candlelight and sighed. He’d really fucked up this time. How was he going to make it right?

Amanda went into the house after the argument with Nick feeling disappointed. She wasn’t really angry with him but she knew Savannah was up to no good and was after more than a singing career from Nick mentoring her. She knew that Nick saw good in people and tended to be very naive when it came to people he didn’t know well.

“Back so soon?” Lisa asked from the couch in the living room. She’d been watching the kids while Nick and Amanda had their date.

“Unfortunately.” Amanda said wearily, sitting down next to her and sighing.

“What happened? You look upset.”

“I just don’t know what to do about this situation with that singerhe’s mentoring. I don’t want to deal with this nonsense and he just doesn’t see it the way I do. You met this girl, didn’t you, Lisa?” Amanda asked. Lisa thought about Savannah and what the girls on the forum were discussing. The situation did look bad, but everyone who knew Nick knew that nothing was going on. Savannah wanted to make it look like it was.

“Amanda, AJ and I warned Nick before dinner about this but he didn’t know what to do either. He’s very torn up right now and I know he hasn’t been trying to upset you or anything. Maybe you should listen to him and be patient.” Lisa said.

Amanda sat there as Lisa told her about the fans talking, showed her the photos and explained that Nick meant to tell her but didn’t want to upset her right before her birthday. She felt bad for giving him a hard time when it was obvious that it was not his fault. Amanda waited up that night for Nick to come to bed, but he never came back in from the studio and she knew he was outside punishing himself.

“He still hasn’t come inside?” AJ asked when Amanda came down to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of milk.

“The light is on on his studio, I checked. So either he’s working or he doesn’t want to be bothered. I feel terrible for yelling at him, Jay...but I was so angry. I guess that I got a little jealous…”

“You? Amanda Carter...Jealous? I never thought I’d see that.” AJ chuckled.

“Shut it, AJ. You know what I mean. I saw Savannah and I felt sick to my stomach. She’s gorgeous.”

“You’re hotter than she is.”

Amanda smiled at AJ, remembering how he’d tried to date her but she never saw anything other than a friend in him. He just wasn’t her type but she was glad he’d started dating the drummer in Nick’s band, Skye. They were very happy and Nick kept saying how they’d be the next pair in the neighborhood to be married.

“I’m going to tell Skye.”

AJ pretended to look offended.

They were both interrupted by the door opening and a tired looking Nick walking into the kitchen, his eyes falling on Amanda as he hung his head and looked at the floor.

“Nick, wait…” she said, catching him at the bottom of the stairwell that led to their bedroom.

“Look, if you’re going to yell at me again, can it wait until tomorrow?” Nick asked softly.

“I’m not going to yell at you.” Amanda whispered with a small smile.

Nick looked thoroughly confused. He made a face and turned his head sideways like their dog Michelle often did when she didn’t understand not to dig in the garbage or not to chew on Nick’s shoes. Amanda almost laughed because it looked so funny.

“What are you going to-“ Nick started, but his mouth was interrupted by his wife’s. He was sincerely surprised after their argument outside.

“I’m sorry that I got so angry.” Amanda apologized after she’d led Nick upstairs to their bedroom. They lay next to one another, cuddling and talking about everything, and Amanda realized she was being stupid. She had no right to suspect anything but she was angry at Savannah for attempting to kiss Nick in the recording studio when he was telling her he wasn’t interested.

“Baby, I understand. I mean….I didn’t really warn you about the mentoring so it’s partially my own fault. I had no idea she was going to come onto me. Howie set the whole thing up.” Nick said. They kissed and she nuzzled into his neck, allowing his chin to rest on her head. He smiled, taking in her scent. He loved just laying there and talking with her, for him that was even better than sex. Having that companionship was the best part of their marriage. As they lay there, Nick knew that he’d have to get Howie involved if this mess was going to ever go away, because he didnt want things to escalate. Savannah was already constantly texting him and asking when they’d work together. Asking what he was doing. Calling him and getting mad when he wouldn’t answer. She was acting like a stalker.

He knew what he had to do.




A couple of days later, Nick arranged a meeting at the office with Howie and Savannah, telling her it was to discuss the songs they’d been working on together. Nick didnt telll her that he was cutting her loose. Before she arrived, Nick got there early to talk things over with Howie. His manager was disappointed but understood when Nick showed him all the messages and explained what Savannah had been doing to try to wreck his marriage.

“I’m so sorry, Nick. I had no idea any of this was happening. You should have said something sooner. This is very serious. She came onto you at your recording studio and she could have twisted that to make it sound like something happened. In this day and age you cannot risk being accused of anything.”

“Well, not only that but she doesn’t seem to understand the word no.” Nick laughed as yet another message came over his phone from Savannah. The whole situation was stressing him out and he couldn’t wait to be done with it and block her number. Savannah walked into the room not much later, wearing an outfit that Nick was sure she wore in an effort to make him attracted to her.

“Savannah, we called this meeting because there’s some concerns about you and Nick.” Howie started. Savannah was trying to catch Nick’s eye during the whole conversation and he avoided her. He could feel himself becoming more and more anxious during the whole discussion and by the time he was addressed his hands were drenched in sweat.

“So what are you trying to say?” Savannah asked suddenly.

“Look, I cant work with you any more. I brought your stuff but I really cannot work with you because I feel that you’re not really taking our partnership professionally. The way you talked to me last week...Savannah...it made me so uncomfortable and I do not want to continue working with you. I’m sorry.”

Nick felt the heat from her eyes as she glared at him from across the table.

“So that’s it then?”

“I’m afraid so, yes.” Nick said softly.

“Nick is a married man, Savannah. Surely you understand that your behavior has been inappropriate.” Howie offered. This didn't really make Savannah any less angry.

“You are really making a huge mistake, Carter.” Savannah said, her voice cold. Nick had never seen her act like this before. It was like someone had flipped a switch.

After the meeting, Nick and Savannah were in the elevator going down to the parking garage. The air was tense and Nick was silent the whole time.

“I really like you, Nick. It’s a shame that you had to end things like this because I am so much better for you than Amanda and I wish you’d see that.”

“I don’t like you that way,” Nick said. He wished the elevator would hurry.

Savannah moved in front of him and he couldn’t really get away, the elevator seemed so much smaller than it was.

“I can change your mind…” she whispered into his ear. Just as she was about to kiss him, the elevator opened and Nick bolted to his car, locking himself inside. He sped off as fast as he could go under the speed limit. A text came across his phone from Savannah but he didn’t open it, just saw it in the preview on his lock screen.

See you soon...