Superstitions
Prologue
Ellie
November 1st, 2005
Everyone tells me that it wasn’t my fault, that I shouldn’t feel guilty. Even Marco didn’t blame me, though he was the last who should forgive me. He should have hated me. That he didn’t, though, was more a testament to his loyalty than to my innocence. Sure I didn’t…it doesn’t matter what I did or didn’t do; I should have stopped it. I saw the signs. I knew that something was wrong, and I did nothing to stop it. And he paid the price. I couldn’t get the last image of him, as he’d been struggling to breathe, out of my head. He’d grabbed my hand and wouldn’t let go until he was sure I understood that he didn’t blame me.
Want to hear something strange? I dreamed of Rick Murray a few days before it happened. If that wasn’t a sign, I don’t know what is. He practically told me what was going to happen. And even if he hadn’t, I should have…I don’t know; I should have realized that his just being there was a warning in itself. I barely knew him when he was alive, and he certainly wasn’t someone I’d consider a friend, why would I dream of him now that he was dead?
I am in the Zen Garden, trying to read a book, but the words on the page aren’t making any sense and I am getting frustrated. I look up and see him. My boyfriend, Karl Headetts. My breath catches as he crosses from the door opposite me and kneels before me, handing me a single rose. I smile down at him and carefully tuck the rose into my hair, leaning down to kiss him.
Before our lips meet, though, he stands and moves around behind me. I start to look up, but gentle hands stroke my cheek and a familiar voice urges me not to turn my head. A moment later, a necklace appears in those same hands. A silver strand with a malachite pendant, beautiful in its understated simplicity. The necklace is very carefully placed around my neck, the gentle hands tracing along the chain until they reach the nape of my neck, where they carefully fasten the clasp. The person behind me moves slowly into my line of sight, and I am not at all surprised to discover that it isn’t Karl at all. I’d known, of course, that the hands belonged instead to my best friend, Marco.
Marco leans in and kisses my cheek chastely. I smile as I feel the warmth of his breath against my skin. He steps back and closes his eyes, tilting his face to the sun. I look up as well, and gaze as a black balloon floats down, toward me. Marco’s hand reaches out and grabs it, pulling it away before it reaches me. He pulls a needle from his pocket and pops the balloon, magically transforming it into a glass of crystal clear water, which he hands to me as if he’s handing me the world.
I set it aside as he reaches for my hand, pulling me to my feet and gracefully drawing me into a slow dance. I rest my head against his shoulder as we sway to unheard music, perfectly in sync.
I feel someone tap on my shoulder and discover that it’s Marco’s new boyfriend, Frank Seo. I nod and step away, watching as Frank takes my place, spinning Marco around the garden and through the door to my left. My smile fades as they disappear, swallowed by the crowd in the school hallway. My hand goes absently to the pendant Marco gave me, but to my horror, it’s not there. The chain is missing. I rise quickly and begin to search the ground for it.
A hand grasps my wrist and stops my search. I look up at Karl, who has another necklace for me, to replace the one I’ve lost. This one is a gold colored choker adorned with garnets. It’s pretty, but I still feel a great loss as he places it around my neck. Karl kisses me, sending shivers down my spine as his hand trails down my back. After a few moments, though, he suddenly turns and leaves the garden, following Marco into the crowd.
I hear a voice behind me, and turn to see Rick standing where Karl had been only a few moments before. I see a silver strand dangling from his hands. Marco’s necklace! I reach for it, but Rick shakes his head sadly. His mouth is moving, but I can’t understand what he’s saying. He looks at me sternly, and repeats his words. This time I can catch a few of them. Most of them mean nothing, but one sentiment does seem to prevail in the few that I do catch. Loss.
He must be talking about the necklace. I reach out my hand, hoping he’ll give it back to me. He frowns, clearly disappointed by my reaction. But he nods and steps closer, placing the necklace carefully in my hand and folding my fingers around it. He leans in and whispers into my ear. “La presa su stretto, non perde il suo regalo. A volte lei deve scegliere tra l'argento e tra l'oro.”
“What?” I can’t understand him. I look up, confused, but he’s already retreating. “No wait. I didn’t understand.”
But he fades away and I am left standing alone in the garden.
Needing to regain a sense of security, I look down at my hand and slowly open my fingers, revealing the malachite pendant. To my horror a strange wind blows through what remains of the garden, and it’s as if an invisible hand reaches out and grabs the necklace from me. I fight against the wind, but can’t seem to walk, so I drop to my knees and try to crawl toward the wayward silver chain. Moments before I reach it, a crow swoops in seemingly from nowhere and snaps it up, disappearing with its prize.
I woke then, a horrible feeling of loss spreading through my entire being. Over a necklace.
I didn’t understand it then.
How I wish I had.