If Only.. by babygirl69
Summary: Four friends on a vacation in Los Angeles. Jessica just wants to have a good time. Will a freak run in with her favorite singer turn into love or just another guy in her past that left her heartbroken...
Categories: Fanfiction > Backstreet Boys Characters: AJ, Group, Other
Genres: Drama, Dramedy, Romance
Warnings: Graphic Sexual Content, Sexual Assault/Rape, Sexual Content
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 8 Completed: No Word count: 9866 Read: 7497 Published: 06/01/09 Updated: 06/04/09
Chapter 5 by babygirl69
Author's Notes:
2 chapters in one night!! woo hoo!!
So, this is my eleventh day in LA. Which meant, tomorrow at 11 am, my plane leaves to go back home. I've seen AJ every day except one since I've been here. We had gotten to know each other a lot these past two weeks. We aren't a couple or anything, but we do kiss goodnight when he takes me back to my hotel, and we've been involved in three or four make outs in the back row at the movies.

Today, however, is gonna be a sad day. Because it's my last here, which means saying goodbye. I ddin't want to say goodbye, I hated goodbye. As much as I might have fought for this not to happen, my heart did it anyway. It fell for him. And now, I had to let go.

"Jessie? You ready?"

"Leave me alone Casey!"

I rolled over in my bed and covered my head with the covers.

"You have to get up Jessica!"

"No I don't!"

"Why?"

"Because." I felt a tear roll off my cheek as Casey pulled the blanket off my head.

"Sweetie what's wrong? Did something happen with AJ?"

"Yes." I sniffled.

"What?"

"My heart fell for him, and now I have to leave him."

I sat up in bed and wiped my face. I looked up at Casey, who wrapped her arm around me to comfort me.

"I'm sorry Jess."

"You made me promise..you made me promise that if I felt something with him, I'd pursue it."

"Yeah, I did."

"Well, how can I pursue it when I'll be so far away?"

"I don't know hun."

"What am I supposed to do, Casey?" I asked, letting the tears flow, as I burried my head in Casey's shoulder.

She rubbed my back, "Shh..it'll be ok. Everything will find a way to work out."


After ten minutes or so, I finally calmed down, and decided to get ready for my last day in LA. There were still so many places to visit, but I didn't care about any of them. I was spending my entire day with AJ. I wanted to spend all the time possible with him.

Around noon, he picked me up. He took me to his house, after I begged him to let me see it. I was curious if his house matched his personality as well as he said it did. When we walked in, I fell in love with it. His decor was incredible. It was gothic and classic at the same time. It matched him perfectly.

He gave me the grand tour of his home, not leaving any rooms out. He even showed my all three of his bathrooms. They were all different in their own way. After the tour, we went into his living room, where we lounged on his couch.

"I don't want you to leave tomorrow." He said, finally breaking the silence that fell over us.

"I don't want to either. But, I have to. My job and apartment are all back in Indiana. And all of my stuff...I wish I could find a job and apartment here within the next 24 hours." I said, frowning as I thought about leaving tomorrow.

"Me too. I really love spending time with you."

I sat up so I could look at his face. "I really love being with you." I continued, "I know I'm a fan, but, meeting Alex, meant everything to me. I always heard you say there was a difference between AJ and Alex. And, I see it. And, I love it."

He smiled, "Call me Alex. I like it coming from you."

"Ok." I smiled. "Alex."

He hugged me and we just sat on the couch holding each other. Over the past two weeks, we had talked about almost everything. We knew each other better than best friends did. I told him things I'd never even told Casey. And he trusted me enough to tell me things he's never told anyone. The fact that he trusted me that much, made me the happiest girl in the world. He knew I'd never hurt him in any way, and that meant everything to me.

"What do you wanna do for your last night?" He asked, quietly in my ear as he held me close.

"I don't want it to be my last night...can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

I broke from his arms, turning around on the couch so that I was facing him and sitting up straight.

"I'm just wondering something. I've been trying to figure it out for days."

"What's that?" He asked.

"What are we doing? I mean, are we dating? Or just friends?" I began to ramble. "I mean, I know we're not like an officail couple or anything.but, if we're just friends that confuses me because we kiss, and-"

"Jessica slow down!" He laughed.

"Sorry." I said, giving him an apologetic look. "I'm just curious."

"Jess, I really like you. I'd like to think we're more than friends.."

"I really like you too, Alex."

He smiled and cupped my chin. As he leaned in to kiss me, my heart skipped a beat. The kiss only lasted a second or two before he continued speaking.

"The only problem is...you're leaving tomorrow. And, long distance relationships are really, really hard."

I nodded, and lowered my head, "I know."

"I know you have to go back, I'm not gonna ask you to move here when we've only known each other for two weeks. Besides, we can talk on the phone everyday..and text all day. Plus, there's webcams, and I can visit you every few weeks. And, sometimes you can come back out here. We can find a way to make it work."

He held me and let me softly cry on his shoulder, as the sun went down. We fell asleep together like that on the couch. When I woke up the next morning, it was to my cell ringing. Casey was calling, and I knew why.

"Yeah?" I answered after flipping my phone open.

"Jessica, where are you? It's 9, our plane leaves in two hours."

"I'll be there, I'm at Alex's house. Will you bring my stuff to the airport, and I'll ask Alex to drop me off."

"Sure. And, Jess?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm really sorry we're leaving."

"Me too. I'll see you in a little bit."

I flipped my phone closed, and stretched my legs. When I looked down, I saw Alex laying on the couch, sleeping. He looked like a perfect angel. His eyes were softly closed, and his mouth was open just slightly. And, the way he had himself curled in a ball was adorable.

I shook him awake gently, and waited for him to sit up before telling him it was time.

"Good morning." He said with a smile

"Morning." I smiled back

His smile slowly faded as he realized what time it was.

"Um, do you think you could drop me off at the airport? If not, I can take a cab, it's fine."

"You're not taking a cab. I'll take you. Should we go now?"

"Probably."

He sighed and stood up. After we both freshened up a bit, we left for the airport. He parked in the lot, and walked me inside. Not ready to let him go yet, I stood, wrapped in his arms until the boarding call.

"Attention passengers. Flight 345 to Indianapolis, is now boarding at gate 3." The lady said over the intercom.

I looked up at Alex, and felt my tears falling from my eyes. He cupped my face and leaned in to kiss me. It was a tender, loving kiss. When he pulled back, I saw a tear run down his cheek.

"Alex?" I whispered, and wiped his tear away with my thumb.

"Sorry." He whispered, and chuckled.

"I guess I have to go."

"Ok."

"Bye Alex." I said, kissing him one last time.

As I took my seat on the plane, I bowed my head and prayed to God to find a way to lead me back into his arms. The one thing I didn't want when I went to LA was to fall in love. And, that's just wat happened. Leaving me with a broken heart..
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