Chapter 11
I gazed at the pictures, my eyes lingering on his face. He was so young in these photos. This is truly back when the guys were just barely getting together. Hell, I was 15, going on 16 when I had met the rather older Kevin. In fact, if all truth be known, it was his place I was breaking into. And he was the one man that I had fallen in love with, even though I was under age. And he knew that, and he had fallen in love with me. We tried to hide it, tried actually not to let it happen. I closed my eyes, my mind wandering back to our first kiss. It wasn’t supposed to happen, duh. Me being under age would so have gotten his ass tossed in jail. But, he held me in his arms, said he was worried about the life I was leading. Said he wanted to take care of me. And at that age, I believed him. And without thinking about it, his lips were pressing against mine and I could feel my stomach tighten up and I could feel my heart pound. In a matter of 15 seconds, I had fallen in love with Kevin Richardson. Of course, things weren’t meant to be.

I closed the photo album, jumped off the couch and put it back on the shelf. I couldn’t think about him. Really! It had to stop! He was married, even if the relationship was rocky. Kevin always tried to work things out. Why would his marriage be any different? And of course there was his son! Mason was adorable, and I’m sure for Mason’s sake alone, Kevin would try and work things out. And there was AJ, whom…whom…I could see myself marrying. But, only if Kevin stayed married. I closed my eyes and shook my head, falling back on the couch again.

“Lord, why? Kevin was out of my life. For crying out loud, I was 15! Most people that age don’t know what true love was. I left thinking that it was really just an infatuation. And yet, here you are, placing first Brian, who really is like one of my best friends. Than you give me AJ and he’s so sweet and I really like him. But after all of that, you give me Brian’s cousin, Kevin. Why Lord? Why are you making it beyond difficult for me? I know you’ll be here to help me and guide me, but I’ll be honest, I’m not feeling that guidance right now actually.” I shut my mouth, glancing around for my pen and paper. Sometimes, the Lord talks to us in ways we just never thought. Through that rant, I was inspired for my next story; in fact, it had a lot to do with questioning God and what He was doing in our lives.

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Two days later, I sat at my computer, my fingers flying over the keyboard, trying to ignore the intense ringing of my house phone. I rolled my eyes as I answered it.

“Hello.”

“What has taking you so long?”

“Megan, my ever sweet, ever wonderful editor. How are you doing?”

“Would be better if my writer would tell me how she’s doing.” I laughed, seeing my cell phone vibrate.

“I promise to get you something by tomorrow.”

“You promise?” I hit ignore on my cell phone, knowing AJ would be calling me right back anyway.

“I promise. In fact, I’ve been working on it. So, you should have the ideas along with a very rough outline by tomorrow.”

“I better, or…”

“I know, I’m fired. Have a great day Megan.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” I rolled my eyes and shook my head as I clicked off my cordless. I quickly flipped open my cell phone and dialed AJ back.

“I missed you call honey?”

“Yeah, that’s not like you.”

“I’m sorry. I was talking to Megan. What’s up?”

“Well, the guys were going to go have lunch in a little bit, thought you might want to join us.” I pulled my lip between my teeth, not wanting to go at all. But, this was actually, the fourth time I had been invited to hang out with the group and it was going to start looking bad if I refused. But I still couldn’t help not wanting to be around Nick with his advances, D with is dog ugly stares or even with Kev and the feelings he was producing.

“I would love to Alex, but I have to meet this deadline by tomorrow and I’m not completely done yet.”

“That sounds like an excuse.”

“It’s not, I promise.”

“Hold on, someone wants to talk to you.” I waited a few seconds before I heard someone else’s voice.

“Do you not love us anymore?”

“That’s not it Bri. I’ve just been busy, with working and…”

“And ignoring us. Ya know, if that’s how it’s going down, I’m going to forbid you from seeing AJ anymore.” I laughed at that.

“I’m not ignoring you. Or at least all of you. But that’s not why I haven’t gone with you all.”

“You better not be lyin’. Anyways, here’s AJ. I’ll call you later.”

“Sorry darlin’.”

“No worries. I can’t make it today, but what about tomorrow?”

“Are you sure?”

“I have to go to my editor’s office, which isn’t too far away from the studio. So, if you extend the invite for tomorrow, I’ll promise to take you up on it.”

“Darlin, the invite is always there. Okay, they’re calling me now, so I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Have fun.”

“Love you.” He quickly hung up, not quite giving me the chance to respond. Wow, love, okay. I closed my cell phone, running my hands through my hair. My time of avoiding them was up. Yes, I had to, because avoiding everyone wasn’t working anymore, they really knew what I was trying to do.