AJ’s POV

"We're here."

I heard Brian informed us while looking at the passenger seat where his wife, Leighanne and son, Baylee were sitting.

"Finally." I said while putting on my sunglasses "What a long drive."

I grabbed my bag and stepped out of the car, the rest of the guys followed me.

“I think I should be the one complaining since I am the one who drove for couple of hours from the airport. “ Brian said with a smile

“I am not complaining, Rok. I just stated the obvious.”

"Do you think it was a right decision to leave our bodyguards? Will it be safe for us to stroll around this town?" Howie asked while looking at his pregnant wife, Leigh.

"Don't worry, Howie, Jen said no one in this town knows about the backstreet boys, so you're pretty much like just regular guys here." Leighanne explained while helping Baylee carry his backpack.

We all looked around, there was a small convenience store across the street and I silently wished it has everything we’ll need in our two weeks stay here. Except for our car, there were only three cars on the street which means we won't deal with traffic for the next two weeks, I smiled at that thought. Few people were passing by and no one gave us a second look, which would never happen if we were in another town. It was a small and quiet town, just what we really need right now. I smiled when I saw Howie reached for his wife's hand and held it tight.

"So, where are we staying?" I asked as I pulled out my pack of cigarettes from my pocket. I opened it and tried to light one cigarette but I stopped when I saw Baylee looking at me. I slightly shrugged my shoulders and put the cigarettes back to my pocket and smiled at Brian’s mini version. The cute little boy smiled back.

"There." Brian pointed at the two-storey house in front of them. "That matches the description Jen gave yesterday. She said it has three beedrooms in the second floor."

"Three? Does it mean I have to share a room with Nick?"I looked at Nick over my shoulder and saw him wearing a you-can't-do-anything-about-it smile. Nick laughed out loud when I rolled my eyes.

"I told you, Alex, get married too so you won't have to share rooms with me anymore." Nick teased

I felt a sudden pain in my heart. I was thankful my sunglasses were covering my eyes or everyone would have seen the pain I was feeling. I was really sensitive when it comes to that topic, I was so close of proposing to the love of my life. But she left me.

"You know, I still can't believe a place like this exist." Nick said while slowly shaking his head, I knew he was desperately trying to change the topic. I saw Howie and Brian gave him a curious look.

"I mean, are you sure no one here knows about us? They won't recognize who we are? They have no idea how big we are? Is that really possible?" Nick continued.

"Whatever, Carter!" Howie answered with a smile

“Come on, we’re famous! Right, J?”

I tapped his shoulder and gave him a warm smile, hoping he would get the message that everything’s fine. He knew Nick was trying his best to change his mood. Nick might be the youngest but he has his own ways of making sure everybody’s Ok. He nodded.

We noticed a long wooden table and six wooden chairs in the porch when we reached the front door. Brian smiled and pointed at the table "That would be perfect for our daily meeting."

Everyone nodded in agreement. The management gave us two weeks to come up with at least three or four brand new songs. They told us that the fans wanted to hear songs that were written by us and expecting it on the next album. That ain’t easy but we will do everything we could for them.

Howie opened the front door and we all went in. I looked around the house, there was a small living room in the right, a kitchen and a bathroom. Though everything was tidy the house looked as though it hadn't be updated in years. The house was nothing compared to our elegant and big houses in LA and some other cities but they I feel very comfortable here. This was one of the rare moments where I can be just me.

"Daddy, I'm hungry."I heard Baylee told his dad. Brian looked at his watch, I did the same and realized it has been four hours ago since we ate.

"Ok, baby." Brian said softly while touching Baylee's cheeks "Let's just get our bags inside our room and we'll find something to eat."

"I saw a diner down the street." Nick informed the group

"Are you coming with us, Howie?" Brian asked Howie

"Leigh?" Howie asked his wife

"I'm a bit tired I want to rest first." She answered while touching her tummy

"I'll just buy our food later you guys go ahead" Howie told Brian "How about you Alex? are you going with them?"

"No. I'm not yet hungry and I want to take a nap. I'm tired too" I lied down to the couch, yawned and close my eyes.

"Ok. then let's go. just a reminder Bone, Jen said there is no McDonalds here" I heard Nick laughed before closing the door.

NICK’s POV

"This place looks good. Nice and cozy."

I looked around the diner, off to the left side was the counter, the two waitress there were too busy to notice us. There were like twelve tables and only two of them were occupied. I smiled when I smelled the aroma of coffee. I was about to choose a table when I noticed a cute little boy running towards me. He was wearing a white shirt and red shorts, he was holding "The Flash" action figure on his left hand.

"Uncle Nicky!"

“Say what?”

I felt the little boy’s excitement when he hugged me tightly. I looked at him with confusion.

"What are you doing here Uncle Nicky? Are you having a concert here? Is dad with you?"

I didn’t know what to say, I have no answer to his questions. He was driving me crazy.
"Uncle Brian! Aunt Leighanne!"

The little boy’s smile grew wider when he saw Brian and Leighanne behind me. He hugged them both, Leighanne smiled and hugged back though I know she had no idea who the boy was. Brian stared at the little boy as if he met a friend he hadn't seen in years.

"Hi Baylee! how are you doin'?” The boy asked shyly

"I'm fine. Thanks" Baylee answered with a smile

"Wait. You know us?" I knew that was a dumb question but I couldn’t help but ask.

"Yes!" the boy replied with a smile

"How?" I asked

"Because you are my godparents." The boy replied proudly

"You're what?!" I didn’t mean to raised my voice but damn, I was surprised by his answer.

"Don't you recognize me, Uncle Nicky?" The boy asked softly, I could tell he was hurt. I pressed my lips together, I didn’t want to hurt the boy more. He turned to Brian as if he was asking for help "Uncle Brian?"

"You look very familiar," Brian said finally, and the boy's face lit up "I think I've seen you before."

The boy smiled, I looked at Brian to see if he was telling the truth or just leading him on. But knowing Brian, he was telling the truth.

"Aunt Ally!" the boy called one of the waitress in the counter.

We all looked at the counter to see the person he was calling. The girl he called Ally looked up and I saw she was shocked. After staring at us for like thirty seconds she immediately runs towards us.

"Look who's here, Aunt Ally." The boy said in a very excited tone "Daddy might be home right now I gotta go tell mom" He looked at Brian and then me before he run towards the door.

Ally followed him but he ran so fast. She was sad and disappointed when she came back inside the diner. We were still standing on the same spot.

"I'm sorry about that." Ally said when she came back “Did he said anything?" she added nervously.

"Well, he was just saying that we are his godparents and asking us if he's dad is with us" I shrugged "Why did he say that anyway?"

"His mom is a big backstreet fan, he grew up seeing your pictures around the house. Maybe he believed it when his mom told him once that you are his godparents." Ally explained without looking at us.

"I thought no one in this town knows about us." I looked at Brian

"Don't worry no one will recognize you here except for his mom and me" Ally explained

"What about his dad?" Leighanne asked Ally "He was asking us if he's dad is with us" Leighanne tried to look Ally straight in the eye but Ally kept avoiding eye contact.

"I'm sorry you must be starving would you like something to eat?" Ally asked and gave Leighanne an apologetic smile.

"Yes, please" I answered when Brian and Leighanne didn’t say anything.

Ally led us to a table near the counter, she took our orders and went to the kitchen.

"Hey, Rok! What are you thinking? You look serious." I asked Brian while playing with the cheaply laminated menu, it looked as though they hadn't been replaced in years.

"That boy really looks familiar." Brian finally answered.

"Baby, Ally looks familiar, too. I think I've seen her in one of your concerts." Leighanne explained
Brian looked at Leighanne "Baby, have you seen his eyes? I think I've seen those eyes before, I just can't remember."

"So? Who do you think is his father? Howie or AJ?" I chuckled, the seriousness on their faces drove me crazy.

"That's it!" Brian snapped his fingers "He looks like AJ, he has AJ's eyes." Brian breaks into smile while explaining.

"I kinda noticed it, too. I was just not sure" Leighanne said.

"Do you think he is AJ's son?" I asked Brian seriously. I looked at him like he had gone crazy.

"We're not sure about that." Leighanne said

The food arrived a few minutes later and we continued our conversation as we ate. Brian and Leighanne were arguing about whether to tell AJ about the little boy. Brian said they were not sure if AJ was the father that little boy was asking about, it could be Howie or any guy related to the backstreet boy. It must be a coincindence that the little boy looks like AJ and they have the same eyes. Leighanne explained that the little boy must be referring to Howie or AJ because Ally said his mom was a backstreet fan. She pointed out again that Ally looks familiar and she was sure she has seen her before in one of our concert. She said something that bothered me, She said if Ally was really a fan why didn't she freaked out when she saw us instead Leighanne saw fear and anger in Ally's eyes. Though, I’m pretty sure Ally was shocked when she saw us, I couldn’t tell if it was because I am backstreet boy or she has other reasons. In the end we all agreed to tell Howie and Aj about this, they have to know that there was a boy claiming one of them as his father just because his mom was a BSB fan. We finished our food, after the bill arrived I put some money on the table and motioned for us to leave.

BRIAN’s POV

"You've got to be kidding me."

AJ said while slowly shaking his head. He couldn’t believe the story we had just told them. Well, who would believe it? A innocent boy believes Howie or AJ was father. That wasn’t fair, to Howie or AJ and to the little boy. His mother must be a crazy fan and I wonder what does his real father thinks about this.

"He looks just like you Alex." I heard Nick told AJ

"Is this one of your pranks Nickolas? This is not funny." AJ warned Nick, I laughed when I saw Nick looked at Leighanne for help. It takes a lot of courage for Nick to ask help from Leighanne, and I was enjoying it every time.

"It's true, Alex, he really looks like a mini version of you." Leighanne explained and smiled at Nick.

"So? Does it mean AJ is the father?" Howie asked and scratched his head “Leigh won't talk to me until I proved to her I don't have a illegitimate child."

My wife laughed and stood up. She gave Howie a concern look.

"I'll talk to her, Howie."

My wife went to the couple’s room upstairs. We continued in our meeting but I could see AJ was not paying attention. He was thinking hard about something and I could only guess he was thinking about the little boy.

After couple of minutes I saw my wife and Leigh climbing down the stairs. Leigh sat beside her husband and whispered she was sorry. Howie kissed his wife on her forehead, hugged her tight and touched her growing tummy. I smiled to my wife and she smiled back.

"Hey guys! what do you want for dinner?" Leighanne asked.

"Anything. Actually, I'm starving." AJ was the first to reply.

"Sorry to disappoint you, guys, but Leighanne and I are not in the mood to cook." Leigh announced.

I laughed when I saw the looks on Nick and AJ's faces, they looked like they've just been told they didn't make it to the Grammy's.

"Any suggestion?" Leighanne asked laughing

"Pizza..." Nick replied with a big smile on his face.

"Why am I not surprised with your suggestion?" AJ teased Nick.

"Maybe because we have the same idea?" Nick laughed when AJ nodded

"Pizza with lots of cheese and more cheese and more cheese." I added.

"I love cheese." Nick said while licking his lips

"Ok. I'll go and buy pizza." Leighanne stood up and picked up her purse on the table

"Baby, you don't have to. Let's just have it delivered here.” I suggested. I grabbed her in the arm to stopped her.

"Brian, the pizza parlor is just a couple of blocks away." She explained "I'll just pick up the pizza myself, ok?" She kissed me in the cheeks and headed towards the front door.

"Be careful, I love you." I shouted before she closed the door

"Ew! Rok! you're so corny." AJ threw a pillow at me.

"What can I do? I'm in love." I answered laughing, AJ threw another pillow to me "Wait till you fall in love, Alex, and you'll know how it feels." I stopped laughing when I realized what I just said.

One look at AJ and I wished I could take back those damn words. AJ's smile faded slowly, he took the paper at the table and pretended he was reading the ideas Howie and Nick just wrote. I saw the pain in his eyes. I was so stupid to forget he has already fell in love and was mending a broken heart. It has been four years but AJ couldn’t forget her. Sure, Alex had lots of girlfriends after her but they all know he was pretending, living up to the image of being the biggest flirt of the group. He'd love no one else but her.

I saw Nick gave me the duh look. I could almost hear him cursing me on his mind. We have always been careful with that topic around AJ.

"I'm sorry, J. I didn't mean to ----"

"No harm done." AJ cut me off and tried to smile

LEIGHANNE’s POV

It took me ten minutes to get to the pizza parlor. I was surprised to see the little boy we met at the diner earlier occupying the table at the corner of the restaurant. The little boy waved at me, he was so cute and I couldn’t help but waved back. I went to the counter to place my order. I saw a tall, petite, brown haired woman holding 2 boxes of pizza approached the boy.

I wanted to see the woman's face because she might be the little boy’s mother. But she was facing the opposite direction. And then I saw the little boy pointed at me and the woman slowly turned around to look at the direction the boy was pointing to, and our eyes met.

I blinked twice just to make sure I wasn't being fooled by my eyes.

oh my God!

I wasted no time and walked towards their table.
"See mom, I told you they are in town." I heard the little boy said as he looked up to the woman beside him.

"Rachel?" I whispered

She slowly nodded, her lips formed a half smile. It has been four years since I last saw her. I still couldn’t believe what I was seeing, all I could think of was Alex.

"I wonder why dad isn't home yet." the little boy sounds like complaining

"Alexis!" Rachel gave him a warning look, the boy pressed his lips together.

Then Rachel looked at me "Hi Leighanne! how are you? it's been a while..."

I could see Rachel was trying her best to keep a straight face. It seemed like she didn’t liked the idea of meeting me. But I did.

"I'm good." I answered with a smile. I was really excited to see her. I missed talking to her “How are you?”

"I'm fine. By the way this is my son, Alexis." Rachel placed her hand on Alexis’ head.

I looked at Alexis and smiled. This time I had no doubt who his father was.

"Nice to meet you, Alexis, you didn't have the chance to tell us your name earlier at the diner."

"Aunt Leighanne, you've known me since I was a baby." Alexis pouted "By the way before I forget I want to say thank you."

"For what?" I asked

"For the gift you gave me last week for my birthday, it was the nicest car ever." His face lit up

"I... we gave you a gift?" I was confused and looked at Rachel asking for an explanation.

"You don't remember? The big blue car?" He seemed hurt.

"That’s enough, Alexis." Rachel turned to me "It was nice to meet you again, Leighanne. I've missed you but we've got to be going now. My sister is probably waiting for these." She pointed at the boxes of pizza at the table.

There was sincerity on her voice though I felt like she was trying to get away from me.

"Ok." I nodded

I scanned my purse for a piece of paper, when I found one I went to the counter to borrow a pen. I scribbled down my mobile number and went back to Rachel and Alexis. I handed the small paper to Rachel.

"Please call me when you have time. Let's have coffee." I looked at her expectantly

"Will do. See you around, Leighanne." She kissed me on the cheeks

"Bye, Aunt leighanne." Alexis said

I leaned over to kiss him in the cheeks.

"Bye, Alexis. Bye, Rachel."

I watched them leave the restaurant. I sat down to wait for the pizza I ordered. I pulled out my phone and called up Brian.

AJ’s POV

“What? Baby, are you sure?"

I glanced over at Brian as he talks to his wife. I frowned when I saw the surprise and shocked look on Brian's face. Brian held up his right hand, he was telling me to wait. I nodded and continued reading the materials on my hand. Brian talked to Leighanne for a couple more minutes, he was already sitting beside me when he said goodbye to his wife. I looked at him waiting for the news he was going to tell.

"Pizza will be here in a few minutes." Brian said. His voice sounded as optimistic as he could make it.

"Great! I'm starving." Nick answered without looking at Brian, he continued writing his ideas for the next song they were going to write.

I raised my eyebrow. I knew that was not what Brian wanted to say. I could see it in his eyes, he wanted to say something.

"Leighanne met the boy at the diner again, he was in the pizza parlor, too." Brian started when he realized I was waiting for him to say something. He was studying my reaction and I have no idea why. "His name is Alexis and he was with his mother."

"Good. Did she apologized for making up that story about us and his son?" I asked as I picked up the pen from my lap and motioned to Nick to give me a piece of paper. I was hoping that was all he wanted to say.

"No." Brian stopped to see my reaction again, it was driving me crazy.

I started to write my new ideas on the paper but I was still listening to Brian. I looked at him when I realized he stopped talking. I smiled at him, encouraging him to go on. Brian took a deep breath.

"Alex, Alexis mother is...Rachel." Brian spoke the words carefully.

I froze for a moment, I felt like I'd just been hit in the stomach. I opened my mouth and tried to speak. But my mouth went dry as I pressed my lips together. I simply stared at Brian in shock, and then buried my face on my hands. I felt Nick and Howie’s presence, they were now standing in front of me with a concerned look on their faces. I looked at Brian again and I could see he was hurting for me, too.

"Rachel?... She's here?... How..." I trailed off.

I was so shocked I didn’t know what to ask, and I wasn't even sure how much I wanted to know. Knowing that she's here in the same town was too much to handle. And now she has a son who thinks I could be his father, it confused me more. It has been four years but I was still hurting like it was yesterday. I should be very excited because after four long damn years, I found her again. But all I could feel now was pain, something was not right.

I stood up, excused myself and went out. Brian tried to follow me but I heard Nick stopped him and told him to leave me alone. I silently thanked Nick. I went on the convenience store across the street. I noticed the surprised look on the face of the cashier when I entered the store but I ignored it. I picked up a pack of cigarette and two bottles of beer, I stared at the bottles for a moment. I know I shouldn't be buying any alcoholic beverages, and I have no plans of drinking them. I just felt like these could take the pain away and I could get some strength just by holding them. I stopped halfway through the counter, I closed my eyes hard and tried not to think about her but everything reminds me of her even the damn bottles on my hand.

I can't even remember when was the last time I touched a bottle of beer or any alcoholic beverages for that matter. She was the reason I am six years sober now. She helped me get through the darkest time of my life. When I went to rehab, she visited me almost everyday, she was always there to support me, she never left my side. If it weren't for her I might have been still drinking five bottles of beer a night or a bottle of hard liquor, and maybe partying until four in the morning everyday. I changed for her.

Even when we broke up four years ago, or did we really broke up? As far as I can remember I woke up one morning, finally having the courage to ask her if she could be his wife, if she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me because I was so sure I wanted to grow old with her, but she was gone. I loved her so damn much, I loved her more than anyone, even more than my life. I was even willing to give up my solo career just to be with her. I would have kneeled and begged each and every BSB fan to accept her, if necessary. But she was gone! All she left was a note saying "Don't look for me. I need time and space."

Then I found out she already resigned as the assistant of the backstreet boys' tour accountant. But of course I can't just let her go, I looked for her, I went to every place where she could possibly be. I was so desperate I could have asked the fans to help me look for her.

"Excuse me, are you going to buy those?"

It took a moment before I realized that the cashier was talking to me. I handed the items to her and took out money from my wallet.

"You're Alex Mclean, aren't you?” The woman asked again in a low voice.

I stared at the woman for a while, nodded and smiled. Jen must be wrong in thinking that no one could recognize us here. But it doesn’t matter to him, this woman must be a fan and I knew what will happen next. She would ask for an autograph or maybe a picture of them together. I love the backstreet fans, they were the best fans in the whole world. I would do everything to make this woman happy even if I am not in the mood and actually hurting right now.

The woman smiled and gave me the items I bought plus my change. I was waiting for her to ask for an autograph or whatever but she didn't. Instead she said something that shocked the hell out of me.

"Welcome home Alex! Alexis must be very happy. Hope you'll stay here for good"

To say I was shocked was an understatement. Things were getting more and more confusing. I wanted to ask the woman what the hell she meant by what she said. Or maybe she could repeat what she said because I don’t think I got it right. But she was already attending to the woman behind me. I tried to smile and walked away.

And to make matters worse, I heard the woman behind me asked the cashier if I was Alex McLean. Upon hearing my name, I stopped walking and listened for a while. They were talking about Alexis and Rachel being happy at last. I heard them say that it was about time for me to come back. I went out of the convenience store very confused. I immediately crossed the street, I cannot wait to be home and talk to someone sane enough to tell me what the hell was going on.

I saw Brian waiting for me at the porch.

"You're better than that." Brian gestured towards the bottles I was holding

"I know." I shrugged "Have no plans of drinking them, I just felt like I should buy them."

I put the bottles in the table and turned to Brian "Damn it, Brian, I don't know what the hell is happening in this town. First, Rachel lives in this town and she has a son who thinks I could be his father. And you know what, Rok? There are two women in that store." I pointed the store across the street while my other hand was massaging my nape. "They know who I am, they know my name and you what they said? Welcome home Alex, Alexis must be very happy.'" I imitated the way the cashier said it to me.

"Really?" Brian couldn't believe it either "J, you think you are Alexis' father?"

"I don't fucking know, Bri." I shook my head and lit one cigarette "I have to do something."

"What are you going to do?" Brian asked

"I have to see Rachel." Was my best answer

"How?"

"I'll go to the pizza parlor, they might know where she lives."

"Hey," Brian tapped my shoulder "Why don't you sleep on it bro, and see her tomorrow morning? You have a bad temper now."

"You think so?" I asked him in a low voice

Brian nodded "And I'll research where you can find her."

Brian pointed to the two bottles in the table "Better get rid of those before Nick sees them" He said laughing

I laughed and put the bottles in the trash can before I went inside the house. Maybe Brian was right and I needed to rest now and deal with everything tomorrow.

AJ’s POV

I was staring at Rachel for about ten minutes now. I couldn't believe that after four long years I'd be able to see her pretty face again. She just got in to her office while I was having coffee at the bakeshop across the street. I had been here for an hour, Brian kept his promise and managed to learn where I can find her. How did he do it? I have no idea. It’s funny because though I was hurting and mad at her for leaving me, I was happy to know she achieved everything that she dreamed of. She passed the Certified Public Accountant exam and runs her own small office now. She offers assistance to small business who needs help with their accounting and tax problems, actually according to Brian every business in this town was her client. I stood up and tossed a couple of dollar bill in the table, I went out of the bakeshop and took a deep breath before crossing the street. It's show time!

Rachel looked up from her laptop when she heard the door opened, and she was very surprised to see me standing in front of her table.

"Miss me?" I smiled sarcastically

"What do you want?" She said and looked back at her laptop.

"It's been four years, honey, and that's all you're going to say?" I said with mockery

"Look Alex --"

"It's AJ to you" I cut her off and said with sarcasm. There was no way I was going to make this easy to her

"Fine! AJ, just tell me what you want then leave." I saw her trying to blink back the tears, but I didn’t care.

"Well, I'm not really sure. Why don't we start on why did you leave me just like that?"

"It's been 4 years, Alex, I mean AJ. I really don't think we still have to talk about it."

"I waited for you, damn it!" It’s too late when I realized I pointed a finger on her. I started massaging my nape. "You told me you just needed fucking space and time then you would come back. I've been waiting for four fucking years and I gotta tell you, sweetheart, it ain't easy."

"Come on, AJ." Rachel stood up and walked towards me, her arms crossed. "We both know you had a lot of relationships after us so please spare me the lies."

"Damn right! And thanks to me they all have careers now." I started to laugh but I wasn’t laughing about the situation. I was laughing at myself.

"What do you mean?"

"You see, my dear Rachel, I had a deal with them. They just have to pretend as my girlfriend and in return I'd help them find a record deal. Simple, right?"

"And why would you do that?"

"Because I have to show the world that I have moved on even though until this very minute I haven't."

"I don't really understand why you are so mad when you were the one who pushed us away?"

"What the hell..."

"Daddy?"

I stopped talking when I heard that little voice and I saw Rachel closed her eyes. I turned around and saw a little boy leaning against the door. I stared at him while he was walking towards me, my heart beat faster, what I felt towards this boy was unexplainable. Then the boy hugged me.

"You're finally home, Daddy. It's so nice to see you."
I felt like I was going to cry. I looked at Rachel asking for a brief explanation. She nodded slowly, as if she confirming what the boy has just said, that I was his father. Rachel eyes started to well with tears. I turned to little boy, stared at him for a moment.

“What’s your name?” I managed to ask

“Daddy, it’s me. Alexis.”

My heart seemed to burst with overwhelming emotion. With shaky hand I touched Alexis’ face and I hugged him. I started to cry, I cried so hard for all those times I wasn't there for my son.

"Why are you crying, Daddy? Did I do something wrong?" He asked worried

"No, baby," I let go of Alexis and wiped his tears with the back of my hand "Daddy is just so happy to see you."

"Me too, Dad! I missed you so much!" Alexis said with a big smile "Let's celebrate Daddy, I want an ice cream."

"Sure, buddy, let's go."

"Mom?" Alexis turned to Rachel

I almost forgot she was there. I looked at her hoping she would not come and spoil my time with Alexis.

"Sorry, honey, mommy is kinda busy right now. I'll catch up with you guys later." She was smiling as if everything was fine. I glared at her.

"Ok. Bye, Mom." Rachel leaned over to kiss Alexis.

I took Alexis’ hand and went out of the office without looking back to her.

RACHEL’s POV

I cried as soon as AJ and Alexis were out of sight. I walked back to my table and cried again. I had been crying for good twenty minutes but it felt like an eternity. I could feel my eyes were swollen and my make up smeared. I looked at Alexis' picture on the left side of my table, it was taken one year ago. I touched the picture frame and smiled, now my little boy's wish has finally come true, he was with his father. He has waited for so long and he deserved to be happy. But would it be possible? For them to be happy? AJ would have to leave sooner, the boys will start another tour in a month. What would happen to Alexis? It would break his heart to see his father go again but I would never allow AJ to bring Alexis with him on tour and expose him to his crazy life. They aren't a family how would I tell Alexis that without hurting him? For the first time I regret making up those lies, my plan has back fired. I almost jumped out of my chair when I heard someone cleared his throat. I didn't hear the door opened, I looked up and saw Nick smiling with amusement on his eyes.

"Last time I checked you weren't crazy yet."

"N-I-C-K-Y!!!" I ran towards him and hugged him tight. I felt so good to see a friend at this moment.

"Hey! You don't have to shout." He laughed and hugged me back "So, AJ's been here, huh?" He asked in a low voice while stroking my hair.

I nodded and cried harder on my big brother’s shoulder. I never felt this safe.

"Easy, sweetheart."

I hugged him tighter, I didn’t want to let go. But Nick pushed me slowly and looked at me. He wiped my tears.

"Fix yourself, angel, Brian and Leighanne will be here in 5 minutes. I don't want them to see you like this."

"I'm not your angel anymore" I slowly shook my head.

"Yes, you are. You'd always be." The sincerity on his voice made me cried harder

"Aren't you mad at me for leaving you guys without saying goodbye?"

"No." He shook his head and wrapped his arms around me "I know there must be reasons, you just have to do what you have to do."

"You know the truth?”

"No, Angel. But I know you love AJ so much, you love us so you wouldn't leave us for no reason at all. I knew time will come that we will finally understand you. And I believe that time is right now so go ahead and fix yourself."

Brian and Leighanne were already sitting in the couch when I went out of the bath room. Brian stared at me and I knew I couldn’t fool him. With just one look he knew I'd been crying. He stood up and hugged me.

"What happened?" He asked with so much care with his voice. It made me feel more guilty and stupid for letting these people down.

"Where's Nick?" I asked instead of answering his question.

"He went to the bakeshop," Leighanne pointed at the bakeshop across the street. "He said he's hungry." Leighanne smiled

"He's always hungry." Brian complained.
Nick went back with a box of chocolate cake and cans of soda. I sliced the cake, put in the plate and handed one to each of them.

"So let's get this over with." Nick finally said after having a bite

"Get over what?" I asked nervously.

"Well, we wanna know what happened, why did you left four years ago and why you didn't come back." Brian said.

I stared at the cake I was holding for a moment. I didn’t know if I should tell everyone what happened, I know these guys were just trying to help me, and not invading my privacy or whatsoever. We knew how stubborn AJ could be and if I want to fix the problem I’ll be needing all the help I could get from these guys, my brothers.

I used to work for them, I was the assistant of the boys' tour accountant. I was a huge fan of the boys, that was the reason why I enjoyed my job so much. Nick was like my big brother, it all started when we had lunch together at one of the hotels. Nick had his lunch earlier than the other boys and I met him at a restaurant. He recognized me and asked if he could share table with me, I said yes and our amazing friendship began. Nick saw Leslie in me since we were around the same age. He told me that I reminded him of Leslie. Nick did to me the things he couldn't do to Leslie anymore, she got married the year we met and now lives in Canada with her husband. Nick only see her everytime BSB has a concert there. Nick missed Leslie a lot so he felt like he was taking care of Leslie when he was taking care of me.

Then there's Brian, I got close to him through Nick. He was like a big brother to me, too. He was always protecting me. I was their little angel. I remembered how AJ must asked their permission first before he could take me out on a date. My lips formed a half smile.

"I had to leave so AJ can continue working on his solo album, at least that's what Heather said to me" I looked at Nick, then I turned to Brian "I came back two weeks after.. in your Atlanta concert."

“What's Heather gotta do with this?" Nick asked frowning, he looked at Brian. Heather was their tour manager, Jen was only her assistant. She can be a bitch sometimes and they were all aware that she was so in love with AJ.

"And you came back?" Brian added

"Heather talked to me two days before I left. She said AJ has to record two more songs and he's done with his album, they were already planning for the release and the promotional tour. She said Alex was very excited and can't wait for the release of his album. She showed me dozens of letter from AJ's fans club worldwide. There were a lot of things they said against me. They didn’t want me for AJ because I was not famous, beautiful, etc. I was just a girl working for the Backstreet Boys, they wanted someone better than me for AJ."

I paused for a moment, I felt like my heart was breaking into million pieces again.

"That's why you left? Because AJ's fans doesn't approve of you?" Brian said, he sounded angry.
I saw Leighanne reached for Brian's hand and squeezed it gently. Brian turned to Leighanne, she slowly shook her head.

"I'm sorry." Brian finally said and sighed.

"There were threats on those letter, too. They said they won't support AJ's solo album and career unless he broke up with me and find another girlfriend."

I looked down and continued playing with the cake I was holding. I was not expecting everyone to understood me or my decision. I did what I thought was best for AJ.

"What?! That's impossible." Nick stood up.

"Please sit down." I told Nick in a pleading voice.

I knew I had to make Nick calm down so he could control his temper. Or he would be running back to their house and call heather right away, he was always defending her even from AJ. I heard Nick sighed heavily and sat down.

I continued "Heather begged me, she said we only have to pretend that AJ and I already broke up until the promotional tour was over then we can get back together again. It sounded so easy so I agreed. It was just a couple of months, I had to make some sacrifice for AJ. I know how important that album was for him. I won't just sit around and watch AJ's dreams fade away right before his eyes just because of me. But there was a problem, we can't tell AJ because he won't agree to the plan."

"He'd rather lose his dreams than to lose you" Leighanne said

"Exactly. I had to make those lies, that I needed some time and space to think about our relationship. I had to resigned too so we won't have communication at all. I had to hurt him so he'll continue making his dreams come true." I turned to Brian "Two weeks after I left I found out I was two months pregnant. I decided AJ has to know, to hell with everything, I have to tell him. I lost my mobile phone that night I left the hotel. I sold my laptop so I can have extra money when I came home, so I don't know any of your phone numbers or e-mail address, so I have to do it personally I went to your Atlanta concert."

"Angel, we didn't know about that." Nick sat beside me and put his arms around my shoulder

"You can ask Q, he was there. He was the one assigned at the gate of the backstage. Of course he can't let me in because I didn't have any Backstreet backstage pass, so I asked him if he could just send someone to tell AJ I was there and I wanted to talk to him. Heather passed by, I don’t trust her but the show was about to start in ten or fifteen minutes so I asked her if she could tell AJ. She came back after few minutes and said AJ doesn't want to see me and he doesn't want to talk to me and wanted me to go. I completely understand what AJ feels and why he doesn't want to see me anymore. I told Q it was really important, so Q handed me a piece of paper and pen from his pocket he told me to write down my message and he'd give it to AJ."

I stopped and looked at Nick, my eyes were starting to well with tears again. Nick smiled a bit and encouraged me to go on. "After a few minutes just when the show was about to start, I received a text message on my new phone, I wrote down my number on that note. It was from AJ."

I reached for my phone in my pocket, looked for that message in my inbox and handed it to Nick.

I don't want to fucking see you ever again. And I don't believe that child is mine or if you are really pregnant. Get the hell out of my life!!!

Nick handed the phone to Brian and Leighanne, he turned to me, wiped my tears and kissed my forehead.

"Angel, AJ can't say those things to you, he loves you so much."

"I didn't believe it at first either, so I asked Q if that was AJ's number. Q checked it on his phone twice, it was his number. It was from him." I was trying so hard not to break down.

"Why didn't you looked for us? We might have helped you." Brian said while returning the phone to me.

"The show started after that, I was hurting so bad so I just left. Now, I don't understand why he was so mad at me."

"Angel, I don't think AJ knew anything about what happened in Atlanta that night you came back. For four years he did nothing but looked for you."

"That's why he's mad. Because you left him 4 years ago and he thinks you kept Alexis from him." Brian explained

"But don't worry, angel, everything will be alright. We can fix this one we will help you."

All I could do was nod and hoped Nick was right. Everything would be fine.

RACHEL’s POV

It was the longest day of my life. I was thankful that Nick hadn’t given up on me yet, and Brian and Leighanne were there to listen to me and made me feel like everything would be fine. I was looking for my house key in my bag when I noticed the front door was open. I took a mental note to remind Ally to lock the door always. I went inside the house and was surprised to see AJ in the living room. He was sitting comfortably at the couch and having coffee. I looked ay my wristwatch and it read 9:00 pm. I wondered why he was still here.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him

"Good evening to you, too." He took a sip from his coffee and stood up "Ally called and said she'd be doing double shift in the diner. I already prepared dinner and tucked in Alexis. I was just waiting for you before locking the door."

waiting for you... my heart must have jumped out of joy if she heard those words under normal circumstances. But our situation was far from normal.

"You don't have to wait for me, I have my own key." I said trying to control her emotions, I wanted to run to him and hugged him tight. I missed him so much

"I wasn't so sure about that. So, you can have your dinner now. Good night" He said and walked towards the stairs.

"Hey! where do you think you're going? The door is in your right."

I panicked when I saw him about to climb the stairs
"To our room" He said with a wicked grin "Didn't you tell Alexis we are a family? He thinks I live here too. Don't worry I already picked up all my stuff."

"No!" I protested

"Look, I am not forcing you to sleep with me, ok? I just have to be here when my son wakes up.
Understand?"

There was something in his voice that made me realized he wasn’t up for any fights.

"I'll sleep in the guest room in case you need anything"

I regret what I said when I saw AJ's teasing smile.
Damn!

I went to the kitchen to have dinner. AJ cooked mac and cheese, the b-rok way. Leighanne used to teach them both how to cook. After eating and cleaning up everything I decided to call it a night, it has been a long day after all.

I’ve decided not to talk to AJ until he was ready to talk. Nick promised me that he would talk to AJ, he has to know the truth. I was not expecting things to go back the way they used to. We can’t just become a family, it won’t be that easy. It has been four years and I wasn’t sure about AJ’s feeling anymore. Yes, he kept looking for me but now that he has found me, he showed me nothing but hatred. All I wants from AJ now was at least his friendship, for Alexis' sake.

I checked Alexis’ room first before going to my room. I saw AJ coming out of Alexis' room, he'd been crying.

"Alex..." I stopped when he glared at me "I mean AJ... do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head while wiping his tears "NO! At least not with you." He walked past me.

"I think we need to talk, we can't go on like this."
He turned around and looked at me with so much anger and pain in his eyes. I looked down on my feet, I couldn't stand looking at him.

"Don't you think we're better off like this, just civil to each other." He asked slowly but full of anger.

AJ went to his room when I didn’t answer his question. I followed him, thinking this was the best time to talk. AJ was sitting at the edge of the bed when I entered the room, he looked like he was about to cry again. I cleared my throat and AJ looked up.

"What the hell do you still want from me? I said I don't want to talk."

"AJ, we need to talk, at least about Alexis."

"Ok!" AJ held up both hands "You want to talk about Alexis, fine! I'm going to file for custody on court. He is my son, I have rights over him."

"I knew you'd do that, but it doesn't have to come to that, you have all the parental rights over Alexis, you can visit him anytime you want, we can have some arrangements."

"So, now you are aware of my parental rights. I'm glad you realized that now after keeping him from me for over three years." He said with sarcasm.

"I didn't keep him from you!"

"Stop making lies, Rachel, you've done so much damage now, don't try doing more."

"I am not lying. I did not keep your son from you."

"Then what did you do? You didn't tell me about him, didn't tell me you were pregnant, you just walked away from me like that. You know how much that hurts?" He stopped, obviously trying so hard not to break down. "You have no idea how I envy Brian for having Baylee. You don't know how many times I wished I could be a father too while holding Baylee in my arms. Thinking if I could have my own son or daughter while playing with Baylee. Then after four years, I will find out I have a three year old son, you know how much that hurts?"

AJ looked in the other side of the room controlling his anger then he looked at me again. My heart was breaking for him. He pointed his finger at me.

"You stole my chance of being a father. I should have been there when he was born. You took my chance of staying up late at night to change his diaper, prepare his milk and feed him, sing him lullabies. You stole my chance of seeing his first smile, hear his first laugh, see him took his first step, hear him say daddy for the first time..."

He trailed off, he was down on his knees , tears flowing from his eyes. I took a step closer to him, I wanted to hug him but he held up his right hand, telling me to stop. It was killing me to see him like that, it hurts me even more knowing I couldn’t do anything. I sat on the floor and cried with him. There was nothing that could make everything Ok.

"I missed three years of my son's life... I should have been there on his birthdays, thanksgivings, christmases and all the time my son needed his father. Baylee needed Brian all the time and it hurts me to think my son always needed me but I wasn't there... it hurts so much."

He took a deep breath and looked at me "But I should thank you for making up those lies, for writing those letters and sending those gifts. My son doesn't hate me. He thinks I have to work for his future. He waited for me for so long."

AJ wiped his tears, stood up, took his wallet and phone from the bed and walked towards the door.
"Please tell Alexis I just have to pick up some more stuff. I'd pick him up at your office tomorrow." He said then closed the door.

After staring to the door for a while, I stood up from the floor and sat at the bed. I cannot hate AJ for saying those painful words. He thought I kept Alexis from him, and I did that intentionally. It was very painful to see that the man who loved you so much before doesn’t feel anything now but hatred. It was just a consolation that he thought making up those lies was a good idea.

Alexis saw me crying while I was holding AJ’s picture when he was two years old. He asked me if that was his father. I was very emotional by that time so I said yes. I thought he would never bring up that topic again because he was so young, I thought he would never even remember that.

But he was asking me all the time. I told him that his father was a part of the Backstreet Boys and were doing a world tour and it would take some time to finish the tour. I talked to David, Ally’s boyfriend, who was working in Nashville, to write a letter for Alexis twice a month. Since Alexis didn’t know how to read yet, it worked. Alexis was so excited everytime he would received a letter. Every month I would wrap a gift and told him it was from his father.

For his third birthday and last Christmas, I wrapped four more gifts and told him it was from his godparents. The boy loved Nick, Howie and Brian the first time he saw the BSB picture. I was planning to tell Alexis the truth when he is old enough to understand things but that won't happen anymore. His father was here now.

I was hurting for Alexis, too. I would do anything and everything for AJ not to pursue the custody case. I would find ways to make things better for my son.
I headed back on my room to get my cellphone from my bag. I punched Leighanne’s number. I needed someone to talk to.

AJ’s POV

I knocked on the front door and Leighanne opened the door. She must have seen I had been crying because she hugged me tight. I hugged back and tap her back, my way of telling her it was ok. She let go of me and closed the door. I went straight to the stairs but stopped when Nick spoke.

"Don't you want to talk about it? Are you running away from the truth?"

I turned around and glared at Nick. I was so fucking tired and not in the mood for another fight.

"Drop it, Carter! I'm not in the mood for your games."

"You love Rachel so much and you're just wasting your chance to be with her. What happened to you, man?!"

Yes, I love her still. But that will never change a thing because things are complicated now, Nickolas, so stop messing with me."

I took a step closer to Nick, my fist was closed. I was ready to fight back if Nick made a wrong move.

"Alex!" Howie shouted. I looked at him and saw concern in his eyes.

"What?! Make this kid stop, he doesn't know what he is saying." I told Howie then walked towards the stairs.

"Why don't you make me understand?" Nick shouted again before I can climb the stairs.

"You wanna know? That woman kept my son from me for three damn years. You have no idea how painful that is so shut the hell up! Stop defending her even just once!"

"Why don't you try and listen to what she wanted to tell you. AJ, you have to know the truth. She did not keep Alexis from you. She tried to tell you."

"Ok" I crossed my arms and pretended I was so fucking interested "Let's hear what you got. I’m ready for another set of lies.”

Nick, with the help of Brian, told me everything Rachel told them. Brian also added the details of his phone call with Q earlier, Q confirmed that everything Rachel said was true. I couldn't believe the things I heard, tears are flowing freely from my eye.

"It’s been a tough day for you, bro, why don't you give it a rest? I promise we'll fix this tomorrow, I will do everything I can."

Brian said thoughtfully. I nodded, looked at everyone and motioned I'd go upstairs to sleep.

"We'll be just right here if you need anything"

I heard Nick said, I nodded again without looking back. It took a while before I fell asleep. I saw Rachel’s sad face when I was telling her painful things, when in fact it was not her fault. I cried myself to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I tried to open my eyes when I felt someone was waking me up. They were still a bit swollen from crying last night so it took awhile before I was able to open my eyes. I saw Leighanne and Leigh standing by my bedside.

"Morning, Ladies." I said while checking if I was wearing a decent clothes or if I was wearing anything at all. I was relieved to see I was still wearing my clothes from yesterday.

"Brian doesn't want us to wake you up." Leighanne started

"They all think you need more rest" Leigh added and looked at Leighanne.

"But we heard Heather will be here in fifteen or twenty minutes. You might wanna hear what she is going to say." I looked up to her, surprised. "Husband called her yesterday, before you came home and wanted her to be here ASAP." She continued explaining.

"Thank! You guys are the best!" I said.

The girls nodded before leaving my room. I stood up and took a shower, it was another long day for me.

"You two wake him up, didn't you?"

I heard Brian asked Leighanne and Leigh when he saw me climbing down the stairs.

“Good morning, Rok.” I smiled at him

"He has to hear whatever that stupid manager of yours will say. He is the victim here" Leighanne answered and looked at me. I winked at her.

"He's been hurt enough. Alex can only take so much. I don't want him to go through what he's gone through before." Brian countered.

“Hey! Don’t talk about me as if I’m not here.” I joked to lighten up Brian’s mood. The last thing I want was for the couple to fight because of me.

“Fine.” Brian looked at me then to Leighanne “But you will take full responsibility whatever happens to Alex."

"Fine!" Leighanne nodded.

We all looked at the front door when we heard a car coming. I saw Nick and Howie came out from nowhere. I nodded at them to acknowledge their presence. The front door opened and I saw Heather with Jen, the assistant tour manager.

"This one's better be good, Brian. You have no idea what I've been through just to be here" Heather said while walking towards the couch. I didn’t gave Brian a chance to talk.

."How could you do that to me? I thought you were a friend?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Rachel..." I whispered

"What about Rachel? Have you found her?" She asked not looking straight into my eyes

"Yes! And she told us the truth" Nick answered for me, I was trying so hard to control my anger.

"I see. So you already know she really didn't love you that's why she left you." Heather laughed

"You son of a bitch!"

I was happy that Brian stood up fast enough to stopped me from hitting Heather. My mom was always reminding me to never hit a woman.

"Hey!" Brian turned me around "What the hell is happening to you?"

“I did you a favour, Alex, you should be thanking me. I did what was best for you.” Heather said while she stood up.

“You made my life miserable.” I whispered under my breath, Brian was still holding my arms. Heather laughed again, full of sarcasm.

“Come on, Alex, you wanted that solo album so bad. I made that possible.” She grinned “You became successful when she left you.”

“You’re lying about that!” Leighanne stood up, she ignored Brian’s warning look “Alex will still be successful even when they are together. BSB fans loves Rachel. You made up those letters, you made Rachel believed all your stupid lies!”

“Oh, sweetheart” Heather gave Leighanne a smile that made everyone more furious “You are lucky BSB fans accepted you and loved you otherwise I’ll get rid of you too if I had to” she grinned.

“You are lucky too, I am not a violent person.” Leighanne said then pressed her lips together.

Brian let go of my arms and went to Leighanne. He wrapped his arms around her. Everyone can see the anger in Brian’s eyes but they know he won’t do anything to Heather, he was better than me.

“Why did you do that to me, Heather?” I asked in a low voice, for so many years I trusted her, I thought she really was a friend.

“I told you I did what was best for you...”

“Rachel was the best thing that happened to me, I thought you knew that.”

“There was never a day you didn’t tell me that, I was sick and tired of hearing how much you loved her Alex, she left you but you still love her. She doesn’t care about you!”

“That’s not true! You made her leave me, why, Heather? Why?”

“You wanna know why? Coz I love you, damn it!” Heather was trying to stop her tears from falling “I’ve been loving you for eight years, Alex, but no matter what I do you never noticed me and then she came and all of a sudden you were in love...” Heather paused for a moment “I had to do those things Alex, I thought when she’s gone you would finally notice me, but that never happened.”

I was too shocked to speak, I knew she loved me but I thought she got over me long before I met Rachel. I couldn’t believed Heather was capable of those things. She wiped her tears and took her bag from the couch, she looked at everyone before she walked towards the door

“I hope you can find a new tour manager in two weeks time because I quit! I’ve had enough of this!” Heather opened the front door but before she stepped out she turned and look at me “If it’s true that I made your life and Rachel’s miserable then I am happy, now we’re even”

Heather closed the door and walked to her car. Jen was about to follow Heather when Howie stopped her.

“We need a tour manager, Jen, we need you.” Howie smied a bit.

“Are you serious?” Jen asked

“I think we are.” Brian supported Howie’s decision, he laughed when he saw the happiness on Jen’s face

“I think you’ve just been promoted, honey, Congratulations!”

Nick tapped Jen’s shoulder. She smiled at them and said her never ending Thank yous. After telling her that she has my vote as well, I excused myself from the celebration. I remembered my promise to Alexis that I will pick him up for breakfast.

RACHEL’s POV

“Sorry that was an important client.” I told Alex as I pointed on the phone. He had been on my office for like five minutes “You must be looking for Alexis, he went home 45 minutes ago.”

“I’m sorry, I meant to pick him up on time but something important came up.”

I looked up and stared at him, I wanted to ask him what was more important than our son. But I chose to keep quiet, after all I’ve decided that maybe AJ was right that we were better off like this, just civil to each other. And let time decide if they would ever be friends again.

“Alexis is still waiting for you, he haven’t had his breakfast yet. He insisted he’ll wait for you and you would come. Don’t worry I made him drink his milk and eat a slice of bread.”

I was talking in a very calm and low voice, hoping that I wasn’t showing any emotions at all.

“In that case it will be better if I go.”

AJ said and stood up. He looked at me as if he wanted to say something, but he shrugged his shoulder and went to the front door.

After an hour I received a call from Leighanne, she told me about the confrontation with Heather. That explained why AJ was so quiet when he was here and not picking up a fight. I wonder if he would really change the way he treated her.
~~~~~~~~~~

I was surprised to received a call from Alexis, he never called, he would go straight to my office if he wanted to say something.

“Hi, Mom! I’m at the diner with Daddy. He wants to ask you if you want to join us for dinner.”

“I am so sorry, baby, I’ll be working overtime but you can have dinner with your Dad. And please ask Aunt Ally to bring me something for dinner when she comes home, ok?”

I was silently wishing Alexis would just agree with me and won’t ask so many questions.

“But, Mom, Dad wants you here.”

“Some other time, sweetie, Mommy is doing something important.”

“Mom, you always stop working just to have dinner or lunch with me, why can’t you do that now?”
I sighed.

“Because Mommy doesn’t want you to eat alone but Daddy is there with you. You will be fine, swettie.”

“Ok, see you later, Mom, I love you.”
I smiled when I heard him surrender.

“I love you too, son, more than anyone can love you. Be safe, ok?”

I put down the phone and tried to concentrate on my work. I felt guilty for lying to Alexis, I could leave my office anytime and I was not doing anything important. I was just too afraid to be with AJ and Alexis at the same place.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I opened my eyes and shut them again when I felt the terrible pain on my head. After a few seconds I opened my eyes again and looked at the clock on the bedside table, it read 9 a.m.

Damn! It’s late!

I regretted having two bottles of beer and staying up so late last night. I sat up and massaged my forehead for a couple of minutes, then decided to take a shower. It was already 10 am when I finished getting dressed. I went out of my room and decided to check on Alexis first before going downstairs. Alexis wasn’t on his room anymore, he must be already playing outside or maybe AJ has picked him up. I had to admit I was hurt by that thought, I was wondering why Alexis didn’t wake me up before leaving the house.

I smelled my favourite breakfast while climbing down the stairs, someone was cooking at the kitchen. Ally should have left two hours ago so I wondered who was at the kitchen. I walked faster towards the kitchen and was greeted by a gorgeous man with the sweetest smile.

“Hey! Good morning.” AJ said while putting the plate with bacon and eggs at the dining table.

“Morning, Mom! Daddy cooked your favourite breakfast.” Alexis stood up from his chair, took my hand and led me to one of the chairs.

“Good morning, baby! How was your sleep?”

I asked Alexis while throwing sideway glances to AJ, who kept on smiling, I had no idea why!

“Fine. Daddy slept beside me. Sorry for taking him from you, Mom. Don’t worry He is yours tonight”
Alexis grinned. AJ burst out laughing. I threw AJ an angry look.

“Hey! I didn’t teach him that.” AJ held up his both hands “Come on, sit down you two, let’s have our breakfast.”

“I should---“

“Please don’t tell me you’re leaving without having breakfast.”

AJ’s beautiful brown eyes were pleading, how can I resist that? I started eating my breakfast quietly. For the first time I ate without having to worry about Alexis, AJ was taking care of him, serving him like a king. I smiled while watching the two most special men in my life. I couldn’t help but wished this was real and won’t have to end.

“Mom, Uncle Nicky promised me that he will be here with Baylee and we would play video games all day. I am so excited, I can beat Uncle Nicky this time.” He said with so much confidence that made me laughed.

“I bet you can.”

“I’ll be on my room, Mom. Please tell Uncle Nicky
that.”

He blew kisses to me and to AJ before running towards the stairs. I stood up and brought my plate to the sink.

“I’ll take care of the dishes. You might want to join your son on his room.”

“Nah! I’d be happy to do this.”

He said then took the plate from my hands. I sighed and turned around. I started to walk away from him then stopped when I heard him spoke

“Can we talk?” He asked in a low voice almost whispering

“About what? I mean, of course it’s about Alexis but what about him in specific?”

“I want to talk about us, Rachel.” He said while taking a step closer to me. I took one step backward.

“I thought there is nothing to talk about, AJ. And I agree with you on that. You still have a week with Alexis, and before you go we will talk about some arrangements, you can visit him here anytime but there is no way I would let him tour with you and ruin his quiet and peaceful life here.”

I was trying to avoid eye contact, I won’t let myself drown on his beautiful brown eyes. I have to be strong.

“But-----“

“AJ, I don’t know why all of a sudden you’ve changed. I can still hear all the painful things you have told me the other night on my head. And now you’re acting as if nothing happened. Where is the anger you’ve been showing me since you got here?”

I held up my right hand when AJ opened his mouth and tried to answer “I know it’s been four years. We’ve been through so much pain. You have no idea how much I suffered when I left Atlanta that night, and I know you suffered too. Our life has been miserable since the night I left. I kept saying it was not my fault that you were hurting right now, but I was just fooling myself because it was. I believed Heather’s lies, I did not trust you enough and made my own decision thinking it’s for your own good, but it wasn’t, it ruined our beautiful life together. And that night I came back to tell you I was pregnant.”

I stopped and reached for my phone in my pocket, looked for that message again and handed the phone to AJ. He read it, confusion, anger and pain were written all over his face. He looked at me and I slowly nodded while tears flowing from my eyes

“Yes. I was stupid enough to believed it was from you. I lost my faith and trust on you, AJ. That’s why after that night I stopped trying to communicate with you. So maybe you were right when you said I kept Alexis from you. I should have tried again after that night, or I should have waited for the concert to be over and talk to Nick, Brian or Leighanne for help. Or I should have waited for you and personally tell you the good news.”

I paused for a moment and tried to compose myself again. I went to get a tissue from the kitchen counter, wiped my tears and turned to AJ again. “I think we have to give each other some space, and Let’s talk again when we’re both OK.”

“Rachel, I didn’t know who sent this text message to you.” He started before giving the phone back to me. “It might be Heather or anyone else but me. I won’t say those things to you. Never.”

“I know. I am really stupid to realize that after four years.” I laughed to mock myself “ There were times I wanted to see you again and tell you about Alexis. Especially on special occasions, I should have done that but this text message was stopping me from doing so. I kept reading this text message until I convinced myself not to see you because you don’t want to see me. Pathetic, isn’t it?”

“If I say I’ve forgiven you, would you believe me?” AJ asked seriously

“Let me forgive myself first.” I smiled at him, then walked towards the front door.

I heard AJ cried and it broke my heart. But I had to do it, I had to forgive myself first before I could ask for his forgiveness. At least now reconciliation might be an option in the future. But not now.

AJ’s POV

I couldn’t keep the tears from falling, the things she told me was breaking my heart. I was so wrong for blaming her without even asking what really happened.

“A penny for your thoughts?”

I was surprised to see Nick standing in front of me. I didn’t hear the door opened.

“Don’t even try, you would have to pay a LOT.”
I sighed and went to the other side of the kitchen and opened the fridge. “Would you like to have something?”

I checked the stocks in the fridge and was surprised to hear Nick laughing. I threw him a questioning look.

“I never thought I’d hear that from you.” He laughed so hard again “So what are you now? A house husband?”

Nick laughed again, this time I laughed with him too. I took a bottle of orange juice from the fridge and served it to Nick. I sat at the kitchen counter again.

“I don’t think that would happen, well not anytime sooner.”

“Something happened?”

Nick was serious this time, he opened the bottle and drank some. I told him everything that Rachel said before she left. I told him the pain I felt inside and what I thought Rachel was going through.

“Then give her the space she wanted, you have waited for four years I know you can still wait a few years more. You can’t hurry things now, as you’ve said things are complicated now.”

I couldn’t help but agree, sometimes I wonder how immature Nick can say the right things at the right time. My lips formed a half smile at that thought.

“A part of me wants to believe her that yes it was all her fault, if only she trusted me enough this things will never happened. It could have saved us four years of misery. Then a part of me wants to believe it wasn’t her fault, she was only a victim of Heather. I don’t know what to think Nicky, all I know is we are both hurting because of this.” I paused for a moment “Did you know that there was a text message that apparently was from me?”

“Did I not tell you about that?” Nick scratched his head when I shook my head “How the hell did I missed that one? But I don’t believe it was from you, it might be from Heather. You always leave your phone in your bag. Brian always tell you to just leave your stuff with Leighanne, Leigh or Lauren.”

“I’d keep that in mind now.”

“UNCLE NICKY!”

“I guess you need to go now, that boy has been waiting for you since he woke up.”

I laughed when I remembered how excited Alexis was for this day.

“You don’t want to join us, it’ll be fun”

“Nah! I’ll just fix our lunch.” Nick burst out laughing again “Hey! You better stop laughing.”

“Ok!” Nick held up his hands

“Hey do you think it’s ok if I bring Rachel lunch?”

“There’s no problem with that, but she’s not in her office. She has a meeting with a client in the next town, that’s why she used her car.” Nick turned around after making a few steps “But I can call Brian and tell him to come over because you’re cooking lunch, I bet he wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Nick laughed again then ran away when I took the bottle of orange juice from the kitchen counter and pretended I’d throw it at him.

RACHEL’s POV

I stared at AJ and Alexis who were both sleeping at my bed. I made sure that they would be sleeping when I came home. I didn’t want to deal with more drama. It has been a week since that dramatic confrontation in the kitchen and I was thankful AJ gave me the space I needed. He didn’t talked to me unless he really needed to or if it was about Alexis.

For the past week we had been a family in my son’s eyes. Every morning AJ would beat me in preparing breakfast. AJ and Alexis would bring me lunch in my office and every night there would be dinner for me in the table with a sweet note from AJ and Alexis. It has been the happiest week for Alexis and it hurts to think it would all end tonight.

Tomorrow morning AJ and the rest of the boys would leave the town to start their new world tour for the Unbreakable album. Brian has tried talking me out in letting Alexis come with them on tour. I had been thinking hard about that. I wanted Alexis to spend more time with his father but I was worried about it. Leighanne promised me she’d take care of Alexis whenever the boys were on stage or interviews. I knew that Leighanne, Brian and most importantly AJ, would take good care of Alexis. But living in two suitcases can be abit crazy sometimes and Alexis was not used to that kind of life. He might find it difficult in the road and I won’t be there to assist him, but his father would be.

I sighed heavily before getting my son’s backpack and my travelling bag. I started packing Alexis’ clothes, personal stuff, his favourite toys, DVDs and everything he might need for the next two months of being with his father. I have spent three years with Alexis and AJ was asking for only two months, how selfish can I be? I smiled after packing all Alexis’ stuff, I bent over to kiss Alexis’ cheeks and I saw AJ opened his eyes. He was awake the whole time I was packing.

“Thank you.”

AJ whispered and smiled at me. He was so gorgeous I had to control myself from kissing him too. I just nodded then turned around to get out of the room. I had to move quickly or I won’t be able to control myself anymore, and I would ran back to AJ’s arms. AJ stopped me from closing the door, I didn’t notice he got out of bed. He stared at me and started brushing my cheeks with the back of his hand. He looked straight into my eyes.

“You are so beautiful.” He whispered. His fingers touched my lips.

I was breathless and I felt my knees were getting weak. I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop AJ if he would try to kiss me. I wanted him to kiss me. I needed him. I closed my eyes and savor the moment. He moved his face closer to mine.

“I wanted to do this the first time I saw you again.”

His lips touched mine. He kissed me sweetly and passionately. It felt like we wanted to make up for all those wasted years. His hands started to travel around my body but I slightly pushed him away when I felt like someone was staring at us. I looked over my shoulder and I saw Alexis sitting up in bed. I blushed. I walked back inside the room.

“Go back to sleep, baby, it’s only 11 pm.”

I said while helping Alexis lie down again, I tucked him in “I’ve got a surprise for you tomorrow, so you better go back to sleep now because you’ll be needing a lot of energy tomorrow.”

Alexis smiled before he closed his eyes. I stood up and walked towards the door, AJ was still at the door, he was smiling.

“Good night, AJ.” I said as I walked past him.

“Good night, baby.”

I made sure I woke up earlier than AJ the next morning. It would be my turn to prepare breakfast. I checked on AJ and Alexis first, they were still asleep. I smiled when I saw how tight Alexis held on his father. I carried the backpack and the travelling bag downstairs and placed it in the living room. I went to the kitchen and started cooking breakfast. After an hour I heard AJ and Alexis laughing as they walked into the kitchen. I smiled and greeted them.

“Good Morning, Boys.”

“Morning, mom!” I bent over so Alexis could kiss me, I looked at AJ and he smiled.

“Morning, baby.”

I smiled and tried to ignore the endearment AJ has been using since last night. I quietly ate my breakfast while the father and son couldn’t stop laughing about something.

“As I’ve told you last night I have a surprise for you, sweetheart.”

I said as soon as Alexis pushed his plate aside. I motioned for him to come with me in the living room. He was surprised when he saw the travelling bag and his backpack. He threw me a questioning look.

“You are going with your Daddy for two months. I am going to miss you, honey.”

“Thank you, Mom! You are the best!” Alexis hugged me so tight, then he looked up to me again “Aren’t you going with us?”

“No, baby, I am really sorry. You know how busy mommy is right?”

“But Aunt Leighanne comes on tour with Uncle Brian and Baylee.”

“Aunt Leighanne can bring her work with her on tour but I cannot... I have to stay here. I am going to call you up everyday and you need to tell me everything, ok?” Alexis nodded and hugged me again “Now go upstairs and fix yourself, you and Dad has to be prepared in an hour.” Alexis ran upstairs

“Thank you, Rachel.” He said seriously

“Just enjoy your time with him, and please make him
happy.”

“I will. Thanks. Do you want to talk before we go?”

I slowly shook my head and gave him a hope-you-understand look. AJ nodded and went upstairs to prepare. The boys will pick them up in an hour. I went back to the kitchen to wash the dishes and when I’m done I waited for Alexis and AJ in the living room. I opened the front door when I heard a car coming, I saw the boys getting out of the car. I opened the front door and greeted them.

“Well I guess it’s time to say goodbye.” I said while looking at everyone

“I’m gonna miss you, angel. It’s a good thing I have your number now.” Nick chuckled

“Please don’t call me five times a day.” I rolled my eyes , then looked at Brian “Please keep your promise, Brian, take care of my baby.”

“We always take care of AJ, don’t worry about that, angel.” Nick grinned

“Not funny!” I gave Nick a warning look

“We’re done!”

AJ said as he and Alexis walked into the living room, everyone was happy to see that Alexis will be joining them on tour.

“Ok then, Let’s go!”

Howie said and helped his wife to stand up. We went outside and I said goodbye to everyone. I hugged and kissed each of them. Then it was time to say goodbye to Alexis and AJ.

“Be a good boy, honey, always obey your father. Don’t forget to pray at night and Mommy is going to call you everyday, ok?”

Alexis nodded, kissed and hugged me. He was very excited. I held on Alexis for a few moments before letting him go. Alexis got inside the car, now AJ was the only one left outside. I handed him a paper.

“I wrote everything there from when to take his vitamins to foods he is allergic to. But you can always call me if you want to ask anything.” AJ nodded while checking out the notes.

“Wow! This is a very long list. I think you covered everything.” He gave me the smile that always made my heart beat faster.

“Take care of Alexis, kiss him for me every morning when he wakes up and everynight before he close his eyes.”

“I’ll never forget that. Bye Rachel. See you soon, baby.”

He kissed me on the lips, it was too fast I didn’t have the time to stop him. The kiss lasted for only three seconds but the effect will last forever. I caught Nick’s teasing smile. AJ smiled and waved at me before he closed the car’s door. I sighed when the car pulled away.

RACHEL’s POV

It was a very busy day for me, I just had two meeting with clients. My only break was the ten minutes phone call from Alexis. He was having so much fun with his father in South America. I was happy BSB fans accepted Alexis easily and didn’t give the kid a hard time. I knew most of them hated me but that’s a different story.

I looked up when a tall dark haired woman walked into the office. I looked her up and down, not knowing who this woman was or why she was in my office. She introduced herself as Lauren. I racked my brain where did I meet her. Lauren? Lauren...Lauren, why did that name sound so familiar, then it hit me. Nick’s girlfriend. I was surprised. I'd heard of her before but never seen her before. I wasn’t sure what I'd have guessed her to be but certainly I hadn't expected to see the woman standing before me.

She was not what I was accustomed to seeing Nick with in all the years I dated Alex. A bit curvier, not the glamourous hollywood starlet Nick had an addiction for, Still with those sparkling blue eyes and a natural glow to her, she was a sight to see.

As I sumed her up, I couldn't help but feel a surge of pride run through me. Nicky, who had been like a big brother to me, had finally grown up. He'd looked past the superficial and discovered the true beauty of a woman is in the subtlties, and Lauren seemed to radiate with it strength and security. I smiled sweetly to her and motioned her to sit down.

“What can I do for you, Lauren?”

“I just want to give this personally to you. Nick asked me to hand this personally to his sisters.” She was smiling while handing the white envelope to me.

“No. I am not Nick’s sister—“ Lauren cut me off

“Well for him, you are.”

She smiled again and I find her more attractive now. I opened the envelope and found an invitation inside it. I almost screamed when I read the first line on the invitation. I looked at Lauren, I was still smiling.

“Nick is getting married?!”

I was not sure how I delivered that sentence, if I was asking her or I was making a statement. Lauren laughed softly.

“It’s hard to believe, isn’t it?” She paused for a moment and shot a glance at the invitation card “I myself had a hard time believing him.”

“Wow! You are really the right girl for him. You made him believe in marriage again. Best wishes in advance and please tell Nick Congratulations.” I extended my hand to her and she gladly accepted.

“Nick would probably call you in an hour so you can tell him that yourself.” Lauren checked on her watch “I think I have to go now, I have a flight to catch in three hours. I’ll be going to Canada, got to give Leslie her invitation.”

“I see. You’re going alone?” I asked in a concerned tone.

“Yup. Nick gave me a tough job, just like you his other three sisters has no idea he’s getting married in two weeks! Imagine how Angel and BJ freaked out.” She laughed

“Oh yeah! I can imagine Angel’s reaction and I am glad I wasn’t the one who handed her that invitation.” We both laughed at that thought. “It’s so nice to meet you Lauren, and I am so glad Nick found you.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you too. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Well, I wish Nick told you nice things about me.” I chuckled.

“No! Not from Nick. From Alex. And yes he told me nice things about you.” Lauren looked me in the eyes “Alex loves you so much and I think you two deserve a second chance. I’ll see you on my wedding.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. See you in two weeks.”

I waved at her before she gets in her car. I let out a deep sigh as she drove away. I called up my favourite designer as soon as I got in my office.
~~~~~~~~~
I opened my eyes when I heard the alarm go off. I turned it off and went to the bathroom to take a shower. Today was the the day I had been waiting to come for two months. The Backstreet Boys’ South America tour ended yesterday, just in time for Nick’s wedding in three days time. Alex called last night to inform me that he would bring back Alexis today. I finished my shower in twenty five minutes, which was way too fast for me. I got dressed and went downstairs, I saw Ally on her way out.

“Hey! Crissy left that for you an hour ago.”

Ally pointed at a big white box in the couch. I smiled, I knew what it was. Crissy was a friend and a small time designer. I ordered a gown for Nick’s wedding. Ally nodded and headed out.

“Take care, Sis!”

I called out to her and got an ‘ok’ for an answer. I went to check out the gown, I opened the box and pulled the dress out of the box. It was beautiful, a purple halter dress with jewel embellishment in the waist. Crissy copied it from the dress Holly Hunter wore at the Emmy awards last year. I couldn’t believe that she chose purple, AJ’s favourite color, to be the color of my dress. I put the dress back in the box and brought it in my room.

I went back downstairs to prepare some breakfast. I heard a car stopped in front of the house when I walked into the kitchen. I ran back to the front door and opened it, I was so happy to see Alexis again. He gained some weight and it looked good in him, he looks perfect now more than ever. Alexis ran to me screaming.

“Moooooooooooom!” He hugged me so tight “I miss you so much! And Daddy said he missed you too”

“You have no idea how much Mommy missed you. Did you have fun?”

“Yes! I have so many stories to tell.”

I can sense the excitement on Alexis’ voice. I was ready for him to talk my ears off.

“Tell me all about it, sweetie.”

“There are Lots of girls screaming Dad’s name, they all wanted to touch daddy but I did not let them, Mom.”

“Why not? They are his fans.”

“Because Daddy belongs to you.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. How can a three year old say things like that? I looked at AJ, but like me he was looking at Alexis with amusement with his eyes. We were both amazed by our son’s intelligence.

“I got to go, buddy, I’ll see you in 3 days.” AJ turned Alexis around and kissed him on the cheeks then embraced him tight.

“Bye, Dad. See you in three days.” Alexis looked up to me “Mom, Uncle Nicky is getting married.”

“I know, sweetheart, your Aunt Lauren was here a week ago.”

“Lauren was here?” AJ asked, I nodded.

“She gave me my invitation.”

“Ok. See you two in three days. Bye” AJ waved before he gets into his car then he drove off.

“Let’s get inside, sweetheart, and tell me everything.”

RACHEL’s POV

August 28, 2009
The Hermitage Hotel, Nashville, Tennessee.

Nick and Lauren were officially Mr and Mrs Carter. The newlyweds were beaming and grinning from ear to ear.. They got married in a small church an hour ago and now it was time for the big reception. The couple has invited approximately 200 guest and those are just relatives and friends of the Carter and Kitt families. I was in the same table as Leighanne, Brian, Howie, Leigh, Kevin and Kristin. Baylee and Alexis were somewhere playing with Mason, Kevin’s son. And AJ hasn’t showed up in the hotel yet, Brian said we must have left him in the church and he got lost trying to get in the hotel. We stopped laughing when Nick took the centerstage, Lauren just stayed on the side, smiling. As if it was their cue, Howie, Brian and Kevin stood up and went to the stage too.

“Backstreet boys re-united.” One guest commented and everyone screamed in excitement. Nick held up his hand to make the guest stop, and there was silence.

“This is my wedding day. I am supposed to be the star of the day right?” Some of the guest nodded, some of them shouted ‘yes’ and some of them just smiled knowing something funny or exciting will come up. “But I love my friend so much I am willing to share the stage with him, and see even these guys are willing to support him.” He paused for a moment then laughed softly “ Brian’s going to play the guitar, Kevin will play the piano, Howie would be the back up singer. I wanted to play the drums but my wife said, Damn! It feels so good to say that, my wife.” He looked at Lauren and mouthed I love you and in return Lauren gave him a flying kiss, the guest cheered them. “As I was saying, my wife said I would just ruin the romantic setting so I’ll just play the guitar too”

I felt a little nervous. The four guys were on stage and AJ was nowhere to be found. I hadn’t talked to him because he was avoiding me in the Church. The way Leighanne, Leigh and Kristin looked at me, I knew something was up. I heard Nick spoke again.

“Ladies and gentlemen, my dear friend AJ McLean.”

I froze when I saw AJ came from the backstage, he took the microphone from Nick.

“Sorry, Nick, for taking the spotlight from you.” He chuckled. Nick gave him two thumbs up. AJ looked at Lauren “Thank you, Lauren, for being so supportive of my plan.” Lauren just smiled “I want to dedicate this song to the only woman I’ve loved. After four years of searching, I’ve found her and I want to tell her that I never stopped loving her even for one second. That I am sorry for everything that happened between us.” AJ turned and looked at the direction where our table was “Rachel, you have and will always be my everything.”

It's not that I can't live without you
It's just that I don't even want to try
Every night I dream about you
Ever since the day we said goodbye
If I wasn't such a fool
Right now I'd be holding you
There's nothin' that I wouldn't do
Baby if I only knew

The words to say
The road to take
To find a way back to your heart
What can I do
To get to you
And find a way back to your heart

I wiped my tears, it felt so good to hear AJ sing one of my favourite backstreet songs. I glanced at Kristin, she was smiling and obviously still touched by this song. Kevin wrote this song for her when they broke up for one month. I saw AJ coming down from the stage and walking towards me while singing.

I don't know how it got so crazy
But I'll do anything to set things right
Cuz your love is so amazing
Baby you're the best thing in my life
Let me prove my love is real
And made you feel the way I feel
I promise I would give the world
If only you would tell me girl

AJ was now singing in front of her, tears flowing from his eyes.

Give me one more chance, to give my love to you
Cuz no one on this earth loves you like I do
Tell me...

I turn back time
To make you mine
And find a way back to your heart
I beg and plead
Fall to my knees
To find a way back to your heart

AJ kneeled down, took a velvet box from his pocket and opened it. My mouth dropped when I saw a canary yellow diamond engagement ring inside the box. I covered my mouth with my hands. With tears flowing from his eyes he started to speak.

“I’ve loved you since the first day we met, and after Seven years I am still in love with you and loving you more each day. We’ve been through so much, I lost you four years ago and I would never let that happen again. You are the best thing that happened to me... You have and will always be my everything. You made me the happiest man in the world when you give me a beautiful and wonderful son, Thank you so much for that. I am very blessed to be able to ask you this, Rachel Anne Stewart, will you marry me? I promise to love you forever, every single day of forever.”

I was too stunned to answer, I could hear Leighanne and Kristin telling me to say ‘yes’. I was just staring at AJ, tears were flowing from my eyes.

“Yes! AJ, yes I will marry you” I was able to answer after a few minutes. AJ was relieved. AJ helped me to stand up. “I love you too AJ, so damn much!” I was still crying, AJ cupped my head with his hands.

“It’s Alex, sweetheart, It’s Alex.” Then he kissed me senseless for about three minutes. We only stopped when we heard the guest cheering for us. AJ smiled and took the microphone from the floor “I guess we’ll see you again in our wedding next month.”

“Next month?” I protested “That’s too fast, we wouldn’t be able to pull off a nice wedding”

“What can I do? I can’t wait for you to be mine.” He kissed me again. “Let’s get out of here”

“What? Why?”

“Let’s give back the spotlight to the newlyweds” he chuckled.

“Where are we going?” I asked him while tracing his lips with my fingers. AJ fanned me with a magnetic card. My eyes widened and blushed “AJ!!! You don’t---“

“I knew you’d say YES so I already reserve a room for us. I miss you, soon to be Mrs McLean, and I can’t wait any longer.” He grinned, obviously with dirty thoughts on his mind. “Plus you look absolutely gorgeous and sexy with that purple dress.”

“What about Alexis? Our son?” I reminded him.

“You guys go to your love nest, I’d take care of Alexis.”

Leighanne said while playfully pushing us away. We run to the elevator as soon as Leighanne was finished talking. We spent three hours in that room, making up for those wasted years. We did nothing but show our love for one another. One month from now the wedding will take place and nothing or no one can separate us again.