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Chapter 28

I wrapped the sheet around me, heard the closing of the door and never felt so used, so dirty, and actually, so ugly. He…he was so passionate, so tender, damn it, it was so right! I could feel it, and I know he could feel it to. So, why the hell run from it? But, I would be damned if I was going to allow that man to keep using me, or any man for that matter! And I lied, I could hate him, I did hate Nick Carter! He could take a flying leap off a short pier and I would be so damn happy. How dare he! Who the hell did he think he was?

I curled up in a ball, my nose catching his scent on the pillow, and the tears fell of their own accord. What an utter fool I had made of myself with him. I wanted to believe what everyone was telling me, and yet, that was the proof. He didn’t love me! So, why the hell was I still in love with him? I heard my phone vibrate and groaned. I sure as hell didn’t want to bother with it, but it could be important. Without glancing at the id, I flipped it open and muttered a tearful “hello”.

“Theresa?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re crying.” I sniffled, trying to stop the flow.

“I’m not Kris.”

“Bull shit girl. You can lie to yourself honey, but you can’t lie to me. Is it Nick?” At that mention, the tears started coming once more. “Oh, damn, this is a lot worse. What did that son of a bitch do you, honey?”

“Oh, gosh, Kris, you won’t believe me if I told you. You have no idea what’s been going on these last couple of weeks.”

“I’m guessing. That’s not my fault that someone doesn’t call me, or email me, or even send me a hello on Twitter anymore.” I chuckled and wiped my nose.

“I know, I’m horrible. How can I make it up to you?”

“Pick me up from the airport in like two days?”

“What? You are coming out?”

“I’m holding you to your promise!”

“You so know it. And you can meet the rest of the guys.”

“I’ve meet Nick; don’t want to meet him again, if he’s being a jackass.” I rolled my eyes, knowing she couldn’t see it. “And don’t roll your eyes.”

“I wasn’t. And you can meet Terri.”

“As if I want to meet that hoe. For real, hon, you gonna be okay?” I took a deep, steadying breath, straightened my back bone, and made a promise to myself. There was no denying I loved Nick and that even though he said that stupid ass lie, and believe me, I may not have his whole heart, or all his passion, but Nick Carter can not lie to me. But, even though he said that, I wasn’t going to go and beg him back. If he wanted me, this time, his ass was going to have to work for it, for I was done! And I sure hope he suffered for it as well!


His body slide down the wall, his head hanging down, he was more confused than ever before. He couldn’t deny just how right that felt. It had become automatic almost for him anytime he had been with Terri. And that this one time was precious. He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He couldn’t walk into his room, not with Resa’s scent still clinging to him. He heard the gentle squeak of a door and glanced down the hallway, surprised to see D pushing the baby stroller out with a fussy James inside.

“D, what are you doing?” Howie jumped, not thinking anyone would be up at two in the morning, let alone in the hallway.

“James couldn’t sleep. In fact, he’s being pretty damn fussy, so I figured a walk might help.”

“Being in a hotel room or confined on a bus makes little ones cranky and very unhappy. The twins were the same way when they were babies actually.” Howie pushed the stroller over to Nick.

“You’re up mighty late. Want to join me?”

“Yeah, the fresh air might clear my mind.” Howie nodded and started towards the elevator. “Wait, aren’t you gonna take anyone with you?” Howie had to chuckle at that.

“What fan is gonna mob me at two in the morning? Besides, did you want me to wake Theresa?” All the color drained form Nick’s face and Howie had an idea what Nick’s problem was. “Didn’t think so. Come on, you’ll be fine. Besides, when we’re with our families, the fans tend not to mob us so much.”

“Where did you get that from?”

“A tidbit I picked up from a dear friend.” The doors closed on them and out of the corner of his eye, Howie could see Nick was confused, simply by the stance he took. After a few silent seconds, the doors opened to the lobby and the trio walked out the front door, the man at the desk barely paying attention to them. Howie cleared his throat as they made their way outside. “So, what made you stay in the hallway there, Nick?” Nick sighed, closing his eyes for a couple more seconds.

“Ever done something that was so right on so many levels and yet wrong on so many levels as well?” Howie frowned at that, trying to make heads or tails of exactly what Nick was telling him.

“Well, I can’t say I honestly recall. Why Nick? What happened?” Nick’s fingers ran through his hair, not sure how to even begin with this tale. And it wasn’t that he didn’t trust D, he did. In the past, Howie had always given him good advice. And it could be said that right now, D was the one less likely to be biased on what he should do.

“I’ve kissed Theresa.”

“I’m aware.” Nick’s eyes quickly glanced at D. “Sorry, Leigh had to tell someone or she would burst.”

“Oh, right. Well, that was the first time.”

“There was more?”

“Yeah. I kissed her again.” Howie stopped and placed his hand on Nick’s arm, causing him to stop as well.

“I’m guessing this happened before tonight, otherwise you wouldn’t be so tore up about it.” Howie’s eyes held Nicks for a few more seconds, seeing, knowing, and understanding the problem without Nick verbalizing it. “You screwed Theresa?” Nick’s eyes flared up at that.

“I didn’t screw her!”

“Than what?”

“You don’t just screw someone you love!”