Finally, Noelle was moved into her new apartment in Los Angeles. With the help of AJ, she’d found a great place in a nice neighborhood close to the university. The apartment complex was gated and secure. There was a pool and the driveway into the complex was lined with palm trees.

So, really. It was just like being in Florida. Except not.

Earlier in the week, Noelle’s parents had helped her to load up a moving truck that her father drove across the country. Emily and Noelle followed in her car. It was a three day car trip—with stops included—and it had been a virtual nightmare. Her father complained the whole way about the traffic and bad drivers. He was the one in the huge truck that he probably should have needed a special license to drive, but it was everyone else on the road that was going to get someone killed.

When they got to LA, Noelle’s dad and mom, Emily and Alex helped to move the boxes and furniture into the third floor walk-up apartment. Within a couple of days her parents were gone, and it was just the three of them. Noelle loved her parents, but she was glad that they were out of her hair; her mom had the tendency to be overbearing while her dad was turning into a prototype for the ‘grumpy old man’.

Noelle went with her parents to return the moving truck to U-Haul, and then brought them to the airport to see them off to their flight back to West Palm Beach where Noelle had grown up and where her parents still lived.

When she arrived back at her apartment, Alex and Emily were sitting on the couch closely together. They had hooked up Noelle’s television and DVD player and were watching one of the sappy romantic comedies out of Noelle’s super-lame library of DVDs. Alex had his arm wrapped around Emily’s shoulder; Emily’s legs were crossed at the knee and she was leaning into him. They had just met for the first time a few days earlier, but they seemed to be hitting it off pretty quickly.

It was kind of cute, but honestly, it made Noelle a little sick. And that wasn’t just because she was turning into a bitter old maid. It was because Alex was her brother and Emily was her best friend. Forgetting about the irony of the situation, Noelle thought that a relationship between the two could make for awkward times later if things didn’t work out. She was borrowing trouble, but focusing on other people’s potential relationship woes was surprisingly refreshing.

She watched as Emily laughed at all of Alex’s lame jokes about the movie, and as Alex reached up and brushed the hair out of Emily’s eyes.

“So,” Noelle broke in, setting her purse down on the box that they were currently using as a coffee table since hers had gotten lost somewhere along the way. “Are you two going to make out already or what?”

Emily blushed and shot Noelle an annoyed glance. She pulled away from AJ awkwardly as if she hadn’t even noticed Noelle walk in.

“I hate you,” Emily shot at Noelle with a playful, yet embarrassed glare.

“Yeah, well,” Noelle replied with raised eyebrows. “You wouldn’t even be the first one this year to tell me that, so…”

AJ and Emily exchanged a glance and then AJ turned to Noelle. “Look, don’t get all jealous just because I’m flirting with your friend, Noelle.”

“I’m not—” Noelle started to reply, but she was cut off when Emily started speaking.

“Aw, you’re really flirting with me?” she gushed.

Noelle just stared at her blankly.

“Yeah, wasn’t that obvious?” AJ asked, a big grin plastered onto his face.

“Yes—” Noelle started again, and again she wasn’t able to finish.

“Shut up, Noelle. No one asked you,” Emily replied without ever looking at her. She was smiling back at AJ. “So, does flirting ever include dinner or an actual decent movie in a theater?”

“Hey! This is an excellent movie,” Noelle spoke quickly so that she could actually finish her thought.

Noelle shot a glance at the television; they were watching one of her favorites. It was a sort of Cinderella story. Star-crossed lovers. Boy meets girl, but they lead different lives so she disappears. The boy has to come find her, proving that he loves her and doesn’t care about anything or anyone else who’s in their way.

This time, AJ and Emily both ignored her.

AJ laughed huskily. “Tomorrow night? We can leave Noelle to this mess, and I’ll show you around LA?”

Emily nodded eagerly. “It’s a date.”

“You know he can’t drink, right?” Noelle interjected. “So, it’s not like he’s going to take you to all those quote-unquote ‘cool’ LA bars.”

She was being a bit snippy, but they were blatantly ignoring her and that wasn’t cool. If that was a sign of what was to come, she just wasn’t having it.

“Noelle,” AJ replied slowly. “Not everyone needs alcohol to date.”

“Ouch,” Noelle responded. “That was harsh on a lot of levels there, brother.”

“He speaks the truth. You do tend to get yourself in trouble when alcohol is involved,” Emily piped in, laughing.

“Okay, you two can date, fine—”

“I don’t think that we were asking your permission, sister,” AJ jumped in with a smirk. He loved seeing Noelle squirm. Maybe now she understood how he felt seeing her and Brian together. “You didn’t ask if you could date my best friend.”

“BUT,” Noelle continued, ignoring AJ’s comment and crossing her arms over her chest. “You can’t gang up on me. That’s just not fair.”

Emily laughed. “Are you feeling left out?”

“I’m feeling grossed out,” Noelle replied, but she couldn’t help but to smile back at her friend.

She never knew Emily to be so forward when it came to taking charge and asking a guy out or at least telling him that she wanted to be asked out.

“Maybe I should tell him which Backstreet Boy you used to have on your walls as a teenager?” Noelle teased.

Emily glared at Noelle, trying to read her bluff. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would,” Noelle shot back laughingly, knowing that she actually wouldn’t say anything. She might be bitter about the mess that she’d made her own love life, but she wasn’t going to go around embarrassing her friend with inconsequential nonsense.

“I don’t care which Backstreet Boy she had on her walls when she was a kid because she’s going to have this Backstreet Boy in her bed as an adult,” AJ quipped, laughing at the expression on his sister’s face.

“Alex!” Noelle exclaimed, turning to Emily. “You still want to date him after that?”

“I was kidding,” AJ replied, still laughing. He turned to Emily too. “I was kidding.

Emily winked at him conspiratorially. “You only think that you were kidding.”

Noelle got up and left the room. “You two are gross and I hate you both.”

AJ laughed and then shared the same sentiment that Noelle had shared earlier, “You wouldn’t even be the first one to hate me this year, Noah.”

Noelle waved him off and walked into the kitchen to find the pizza flyers that she’d stored away. She was hungry and tired of playing the game Emily and Alex had roped her into.

Noelle gazed back at her brother and her best friend. She was sure that if they were at Alex’s and Noelle wasn’t around, they’d be making out already—probably with their clothes off. There was so much sexual chemistry in the room that Noelle was starting to feel uncomfortable even being there.

Despite it all, she couldn’t help but to smile at the adoring look each of them had on their faces. It was that look that a person gets when they meet someone and they’re taken with them. A look of hope for what could be, a look of lust, a look of love even.

Noelle missed that look. After almost a year, she still missed him.

Noelle shook the thought off, chalking it up to just feeling left out of the new AJ and Emily bubble. It was time for a new city, a new life, and a new drama to unfold around her; a drama that was hopefully not her own.

She was ready to be the trusty sidekick. She’d leave the boyfriend stuff to Emily. Noelle was settling in just fine with the thought of staying alone.

She glanced over at AJ and Emily again and sighed. Maybe she’d get a cat; it’s never too early to start being the crazy cat lady.

***

Week after week Brian and Leighanne continued to go into George Dalton’s office and spill all of their marital problems. They had sessions together and some sessions alone, which seemed to be counter-productive until Brian and Leighanne learned that the therapist was just going to tell the other everything they talked about anyway.

During their last session, George told them they had to remember why they fell in love in the first place. Leighanne was usually the one who took George’s advice to heart. It’s not that Brian wasn’t invested in the therapy sessions; he was as invested as he could be.

Actually, he was more complacent. Leighanne was actually trying to take the therapist’s advice, but even she was starting to admit that things were different. Since she’d found the photographs that either Brian had been hiding or had forgotten were in his suitcase—Leighanne like to think that it was the latter, but she wasn’t that naïve—she was slowly coming to terms with the fact that maybe she was more afraid of starting over than she was of actually losing Brian. She loved Brian. She would always love Brian. It hurt her to think of losing him, but those pictures were proof that there was life after marriage if your marriage happened to be ending.

Brian had the opportunity to be happy again. In a more stable frame of mind, Leighanne doubted that Brian would ever be able to bring out that happiness in her again.

Leighanne was of the belief that happiness is a state of mind, not a destination. Right now, Leighanne’s state of mind wasn’t happy, and it didn’t look like the path that she was on was going to lead her to the land of “Happy”.

Still, she took Georges’ advice. Throughout the week, she had been pulling out the leftover photo albums that hadn’t been mangled during one of her crazy tantrums and found her and Brian’s wedding video. She had been flipping though the albums casually, but was waiting until Brian was free to look at them with her.

It wasn’t until a couple of days before they were set to leave Atlanta that Brian was relaxing on the couch watching SportsCenter, finally emerged from his submersion into the world of Backstreet. His mind was finally clear. He was feeling a little bit normal.

Little did he know that Leighanne was going to bombard him with bittersweet memories and completely stress him out all over again.

Leighanne bounced into the living room with her arms full of photo albums. Their wedding DVD was sitting at the top of the pile. When they first got married, they used to watch the video on their anniversary. It had been a few years since they let go of that tradition.

Brian glanced over at Leighanne as she plopped down on the couch next to him. The photo albums spilled off of her lap and onto Brian’s.

“What’s all of this?” Brian asked with a hint of a smile lighting up his face.

“These are all of our memories. George gave us an assignment,” Leighanne replied as she flipped opened the first album. “Now, we have to take a stroll down memory lane.”

“You always take everything that he says so seriously,” Brian teased. “You totally have a crush on our marriage counselor.”

Leighanne rolled her eyes and laughed softly. “I do not. He’s not telling us to do things to waste our time or for the sake of hearing his own voice. We’re paying him for a service and he’s giving us his advice. I say we take as much of it as we can.”

Brian smiled as he flipped through the albums. The photographs lined the pages ranging from the first day that they met on the set of a music video all the way through almost present days. It was heart breaking to see the light in the eyes of the younger versions of themselves. There was so much love in that relationship. Both of them were glowing with happiness and the spark was evident from the very beginning.

With each passing year, the light faded a bit more.

As Leighanne looked at the pictures with Brian, even she could see the difference. It wasn’t the same. They weren’t those people and they hadn’t been for a long time. In her mind, she compared the recent pictures of her and Brian with the pictures she’d found of Brian and Noelle. Leighanne and Brian looked like nothing more than friends. At this point, they probably really weren’t any more than friends, if that.

Brian grabbed the first album again. He pointed to the engagement photos that the couple had taken on the beach. “Remember this?”

Leighanne smiled softly. “How could I forget? It was one of my favorite days.”

“It was a good day,” Brian agreed wistfully. “What happened to those two, Leighanne?”

“They were young and naïve?” Leighanne guessed, exhaling a huge sigh that she felt she had been holding onto for far too long.

Normally, she would have said that they were the people in those pictures, but Leighanne was already having a hard time convincing herself of the same thing. It was funny to her how one minute someone could be completely invested in an idea, a person, a moment, and then just as quickly everything changes.

“I guess so,” Brian answered. “Do you really think we can get back to that?”

Leighanne turned the question over in her mind. Eventually, she shook her head. “I really don’t know anymore.”

Brian wrapped his arm around her shoulder and squeezed reassuringly, but he stayed silent.

“Can I ask you something?” Leighanne asked tentatively.

“Shoot,” Brian replied easily, not thinking about the one million dollar question that Leighanne had been holding onto.

“Do you still think about Noelle? Do you still wish that you were with her?” Leighanne asked, and then she held her breath.

She was waiting for Brian to explode. Noelle had come up briefly in their counseling sessions, but never privately. Leighanne had never even told Brian about the underwear she’d found mixed with his things after the tour ended, and she was still claiming to be ignorant to the pictures that were hiding in his suitcase.

Brian sighed. He thought about Noelle often. It had been almost a year since everything had fallen apart, but he hadn’t seen or spoken to her since they walked away from each other in the airport that night. Brian would never admit that there were times that he wished that things were different because it would be so counterproductive. It was hard trying to imagine what could have been. Wasn’t that part of the reason he and Noelle had decided to let each other go? So that he wouldn’t imagine what could have been?

“I really don’t know how to answer that,” Brian answered honestly. “But does it really matter? I’m here with you. I agreed to work on our marriage. If I wanted to stay with Noelle… if Noelle and I wanted to stay together, we would be together.”

Leighanne nodded, satisfied with his answer. The rational side of her could feel bad for Brian. Things had been hard for them in their marriage. They were steps away from divorcing, and he’d met someone whom he’d fallen deeply in love with very quickly. The selfish side of her wanted to gloat that he was there with her instead. She cuddled into Brian’s side and wrapped her arm around his waist.

Leighanne could feel the overwhelming sensation of loss and suffocation that Brian had felt last year creeping up on her. The thought of losing Brian, of being alone and starting over was terrifying, but for the sake of Brian and for herself, she was starting to think that maybe it would be better to set Brian free.

With tears in her eyes, Leighanne looked up at Brian wearily. “Hey Brian?”

Brian looked down at his wife and brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes. “Hmm?”

“I think that you should probably go back to LA alone.”