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“What are you looking at?” Howie growled.

“You. Wondering what the hell you’re doing.”

“None of your damn business,” he said, turning away from her. They were backstage, just an hour or so before show time.

“You are my damn business, Howie, and you know it. That’s what you pay me for, isn’t it?” Lyric was tired of hounding him about his drinking, but she was afraid not to.

“I don’t pay you to mother me. Just leave me alone, I know what I’m doing.” He drained the glass and poured himself another shot from the bottle.

Lyric sighed, it had been like this for several months now. At first it had been a drink in the evening to wind down, then a drink in the morning to get going as well. Now it was several drinks to prepare for a show – and several more afterwards.

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough? You don’t want your fans to think you’re drunk on stage. That would ruin your goody two shoes reputation.”

“I’ve had enough from you, bitch!” He stood up and glared at her. They were the only ones in the room, the others were wandering around backstage somewhere.

“And you’ve had enough from that bottle.” Lyric tried to keep her voice down, she didn’t want to get into a shouting match with him.

“I know when I’ve had enough.” Howie picked up the bottle and drank directly from it. Defiance shone in his eyes, he wasn’t going to let his employee dictate his actions.

“I don’t think you do, Howie. Otherwise you wouldn’t be drinking right before a show, for god’s sake.” She was leaning against the wall, trying to appear casual but inside she was anxious, Howie was unpredictable when he’d been drinking. “Give me the bottle, please?”

“I’ll give you the damn bottle!” he yelled, then heaved it at her head. Lyric shrieked and flinched away, the bottle smashed into the wall just inches from her face. Howie stalked out of the room, muttering obscenities.

“What the hell is going on?” Nick said, running into the room, a sandwich in his hand. Alex was right behind him.

“Oh my god! Are you ok, Lyric?” Alex asked, running over to her.

Lyric was shaking, in shock over the near miss. She was covered in glass, her shirt soaked with Jack Daniels. She opened her mouth to reply, but nothing came out. Several shards of glass were embedded in her cheek, one large piece was perilously close to her eye.

“Go find a paramedic, Nick,” Alex ordered, then led Lyric to a nearby chair. “What happened?” He took her hand, trying to calm her.

“He threw a bottle at me,” she finally managed to get out. “I was trying to get him to stop drinking…”

Alex looked around to make sure they were alone. “He’s getting worse, isn’t he?”

Lyric nodded. “I’m trying, Alex, but he won’t listen to me.”

“He won’t listen to anyone, no matter how good their intentions. I should know,” he said with a sad smile. “He’ll have to want to change. All you can do is try to keep him safe until he gets to that point.”

“I don’t know if I can,” Lyric admitted. “He’s been hanging out with his pretend friends more and more, ignoring his real friends.”

“Keep trying, Lyric, don’t abandon him,” Alex whispered as Nick returned with help.

The paramedic knelt next to Lyric and examined her face, removing the shards carefully from her face and scalp. He put a small bandage on her cheek, one cut was deep but not enough to require stitches.

“There you go, good as new,” he said, packing up his equipment.

“Thank you,” Lyric said in a shaky voice.

Alex led her to the small bathroom. “Let’s get you cleaned up,” he said softly. “I think I have an extra shirt around here somewhere you can wear.”

Gently he helped her remove her shirt, then leaned her over the sink and rinsed the alcohol from her hair. He could feel the tremors that still shot through her.

Afterwards, she sat by herself and combed out her hair. Everyone was being especially nice to her, bringing her something to eat and drink, asking how she felt.

“I want to go back to the hotel,” she said to Brian when he came to sit next to her. “I don’t think I can stay for the show,” she whispered.

“I don’t blame you,” he said, patting her hand. “I’ll get someone to take you back, ok?”

A few minutes later, Leighanne and Baylee appeared in the doorway. Brian explained the situation to her in a low voice and asked if she’d stay with Lyric at the hotel.

“Of course I will. She loves Baylee, maybe she’ll play with him and forget what happened. Where’s Howie?”

“I don’t know, no one’s seen him since. I sent Q out looking for him, I’m sure he’ll turn up soon.”

“She’s better off not seeing him again until she’s calmed down anyway.” Leighanne took Lyric’s hand and led her away, Baylee chattering the whole time, unaware of the tense atmosphere in the dressing room.

When Q returned with Howie in tow, no one said a word to him. A big confrontation right before they went on stage was the last thing they wanted or needed. Alex just prayed that Howie would make it through the show without embarrassing them all. It was a situation he was very familiar with, unfortunately.

After the concert, Howie stood outside Lyric’s hotel room door and knocked, calling out her name when she didn’t respond.

Howie turned when the door across the hallway opened. “Do you know where Lyric is? I didn’t see her during the show and she wasn’t waiting for me on the bus either.”

“She’s gone,” Leighanne said.

“Gone where?” Howie asked, puzzled.

Leighanne looked behind her, making sure Baylee was asleep, then gently closed the door. “She took the redeye back to LA.”

“Why would she go back to LA?”

Leighanne sighed. “Are you that stupid, Howie? You tried to hit her in the face with a whiskey bottle and you think she’s gonna stick around to see what’s next?”

“Whiskey bottle?” Howie faintly remembered arguing with her before the show.

Hearing voices in the hallway, Alex opened his door and looked out.

“What is Leighanne talking about?” Howie asked him. “Did something happen before the concert?”

“Dude, you threw a half full bottle of Jack at Lyric. Thank god you missed her.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Howie insisted.

“You don’t remember anything, do you?” Alex asked softly.

“I’d remember that,” he said. “I think ya’ll are lying.”

Alex pulled out his cell phone. “Pictures don’t lie.” He handed the phone to Howie, who scrolled through several photos of Lyric’s cuts and the broken glass on the dressing room floor.

Without a word, Howie handed the phone back and went into his room.

“Do you think he realizes what is going on?” Leighanne asked Alex.

“No, not yet. He’s still in denial.”

“He’s been through a lot lately,” Leighanne said. “It would be enough to send anyone over the edge.”

“True. But he’s not handling it very well. Thank God Lyric is looking after him. Without her, he’d been in even worse shape.”

“Do you think she’ll quit after this?” Leighanne hoped not, she liked the woman and thought she deserved better treatment.

“No, I don’t think so.” He shoved the phone back in his pocket. “She loves him.”

“And does he love her?”

“Howie only loves the bottle right now.” Alex wished her a good night and went back into his room.

************

“I’m sorry Lyric.” Howie texted Lyric the next morning, but she didn’t reply. “Are you ignoring me or still asleep?” he texted an hour later after a dozen messages were sent but without a response.

“Ignoring you,” was her curt reply.

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Apology not accepted,” she wrote back.

“What would it take to get you to forgive me?” he asked.

“Quit drinking,” she shot back.

“I don’t have a problem with alcohol.” Howie was starting to feel angry.

“The hell you don’t.”

“I don’t. Alex has been nagging me too.”

“Everyone else sees what you can’t. We’ll help, you don’t have to do it alone.”

“I DON’T HAVE A FUCKING DRINKING PROBLEM,” Howie replied, typing all in caps – the texting equivalent of shouting.

Lyric felt insulted by the text message. She didn’t have the energy to deal with Howie and his issues for the remaining three months of the tour. “Enjoy the rest of the tour. I’ll take care of things at this end.”

“Screw you, Lyric,” he said, wanting to throw the phone across the room but thinking better of it. He went to the mini-bar and pulled out a small bottle of Jack Daniels and a bottle of Coke. He dumped some of the soda out and poured the alcohol into the bottle.

Howie grabbed his luggage and headed down to the bus. It was late by their usual departure standards, nearly 10 am, but no one seemed to be in a good mood. He’d skipped breakfast to sleep an extra hour.

Brian was the only one who approached him as they loaded the buses. “How you doing this morning?” he asked.

“Fine,” Howie growled.

“About last night…” Brian started but Howie cut him off.

“It’s my own damn business,” he said curtly.

“No, it’s all of our damn business,” Brian said, grabbing Howie’s shoulder. “We’re all in this together and you put us in a bad situation when you drink like that before a show. So if you don’t cut back, we’ll go to management with the issue.”

“You’ve all decided?”

“Yes, we talked about it this morning at breakfast – a meeting you were supposed to be at,” Brian reminded him.

“Ya’ll can go to hell,” Howie said, turning away and boarding his bus.

“Well, that went well,” he said to Leighanne as he jumped on his own bus. “I’ve given him the warning, we’ll just have to wait and see what happens now.”

Howie watched the scenery flash past the bus windows, but he didn’t really see anything at all. He was too preoccupied thinking about the events of the previous night. It pained him to think that he had almost hurt Lyric, but what was worse is that he didn’t remember any of it – not even the concert.

He didn’t know how he would make it through the rest of the tour without Lyric. She kept him company on the bus, made sure he ate right, made sure he had everything he needed.

“God, I’m so stupid,” he groaned. He vowed to cut back on the drinking, at least right before a show. Between shows he needed something to ease the pain in his heart.

***********
“Lyric? It’s Alex. How are you?”

“I’m fine, thanks. How are you doing? How’s the tour going?”

“Tour’s fine. But your boss, he’s not doing so well.”

Lyric’s heart skipped a beat. “He’s not hurt, is he? Or sick?”

“No, not hurt – just out of control.”

Lyric sighed, she was afraid of that. The phone calls and text messages she’d been getting from him lately had steadily made less and less sense. His pretend friends had joined him on tour, riding on the bus with him and partying until the wee hours of the night.

“What do you expect me to do, Alex? He won’t listen to me any more than he listens to ya’ll.”

“There’s just six weeks left on tour, and I don’t know if he’s gonna make it. We need you to try to calm him down, at least until the end of the tour.”

“What about his family? Can’t they do anything?”

“He threatened to walk out if we called them,” Alex said. “Please, Lyric, you’re our last hope. Management has given him an ultimatum and he just blows them off too. His career - all of our careers - are at stake right now.”

Lyric could hear the desperation in his voice. “Ok, I’ll try. But if anything happens…”

“If he touches you, Lyric, I swear I’ll beat him bloody.”

Lyric caught up with the tour in Toronto. There wouldn’t be a hotel stay this evening, they were due in the next city in only a few hours.

Howie and his pretend friends staggered out the back door of the venue. All of them were obviously already inebriated, Hilary was hanging onto Orchid for support. They were surprised to see Lyric standing on the bottom stair of the tour bus.

“Get on, Howie.” She stepped aside to let him board but then blocked the entrance. Hilary tried to shove her aside, nearly falling over in the process. Lyric grabbed her arm to keep her from falling.

“Let me on the damn bus!” Hilary hissed. “I’m his girlfriend, he promised we’re going to make love all night on the bus,” she bragged.

Lyric leaned in close so that only Hilary could hear her reply. “You gonna let Howie watch tonight, whore?” Hilary jerked back in surprise. “Oh, I know all about you and your slut girlfriend Orchid. If you don’t want the rest of the world to know, I had better not see you ever again.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Hilary said, eyes narrowing.

“Try me, bitch. Do you want to risk your career? It’s the only way you know how make a living because you aren’t smart enough to do anything else but open your legs.” Lyric felt empowered, she’d always wanted to tell Hilary off. “Is Howie worth losing all that money? Coz I’ll do it in a heartbeat to protect him.”

Eric shoved his way between the women. “Enough talk, bitch. Get the hell out of the way.”

“I’m calling the shots now and you can all find another ride out of town.”

“Like hell you will,” he replied, grabbing her wrist. The next instant he was on the ground, twitching.

“Aren’t stun guns a wonderful thing?” she said, holding the small instrument up for the rest of them to see. “Any one else care to try to get on board?” They all backed away slowly, disbelief on their faces.

“You’re one crazy bitch,” Hilary said.

“I’m here to make sure my boss doesn’t lose his job. If he gets fired, the gravy train stops for you assholes, doesn’t it? So it’s in your best interest to leave him alone.”

She climbed to the top step, her hand on the button to close the bus door. “And security has been instructed that none of you are welcome on tour any longer – backstage, in the hotel, or on the bus. So get lost.”

Lyric closed the door and turned to face Howie, who’d been standing behind her, watching the entire encounter.

“You didn’t have to do that to him, you know.”

“Yes, I did, Howie. He weighs probably a hundred pounds more than me, he’s a foot taller than me – how was I going to stop him?”

“All you had to do was say please.”

Lyric laughed. “Men like that only understand one thing – a demonstration of power.” She pushed past him and laid the weapon on her bunk.

“You going to use that on me?” He looked a little dubious.

“Throw another bottle at me and find out,” she said. Howie didn’t like the angry look on Lyric’s face. “I suggest you try to get some sleep tonight. You have press interviews in about 7 hours.”

Without another word, Howie went to his room and closed the door. Her phone beeped softly, a new text message had come in.

“Impressive performance, way to kick some ass,” it read.

“Easy to be brave when you have that many volts in your hand,” she replied to Alex.

“Come over here and hold that many volts in your hand again,” he teased via text message.

“You’re one sick puppy,” she joked back. “And your lightning rod isn’t that impressive.” Lyric looked out the window, she could see Alex in the window, laughing. She blew him a kiss and then pulled the curtains closed.

As she climbed into bed, the driver fired up the diesel engine and the bus pulled out of the venue’s parking area. Lyric didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, but she was ready to face it head on.