Happy Birthday to me
Remember two months or so ago when I asked ‘what could possibly go wrong?’ yeah…I’m an idiot! Of course things would go wrong, I mean it’s not like we were dealing with a normal guy or anything. We were dealing with Nick Carter, psycho chick magnet. I should have realized that Paris wouldn’t be a great fit for him. Sometimes I think I’m blonder than he is.
So, of course he and Paris decided to officially become an item after their third consecutive secret date. He came marching into the hotel room once again as we were getting up and heading towards the studio, and just like that in the van on the way over he proudly proclaimed to everyone, “Guys I am in love with Paris Hilton.”
There was a lot of laughing and ‘hahaha good one’ going on between the cousins, but when Nick didn’t crack a smile, I distinctly remember Brian looking over at me with a look of fear in his eyes, as if he was pleading with me to tell him that Nick wouldn’t be that stupid, that it was all some kind of joke. I shrugged and nodded at him and was answered with an “oh boy.”
Kevin was the least pleased, but are we shocked about that? I mean this is Kevin we are talking about. I’m not sure why Nick was so surprised by Kev’s reaction to the announcement but that van ride was not something that I ever want to relive again. By the time we got to the studio, Nick wasn’t talking to anyone and Kevin kept grumbling under his breath throughout the whole session.
He didn’t speak to anyone at all for the rest of that day and went out and partied all night, only to come home sloppy ass drunk at around dawn the next morning. That’s pretty much been his routine since Hilton entered his life.
Like tonight for instance, here I am sitting up on my couch, watching a paid advertisement for some kind of wonder vacuum on the eve of my birthday. Am I waiting up for Nick to come home? Yes. Do I want to? No. Just that the stupid ass called me and told me he forgot to take his key.
I bought a place here in LA finally after Howie said he thought in the end it would be cheaper if we all just got our own places instead of renting the penthouse from the hotel. I think at that point no one would disagree because living with each other for a month began to take its toll on us. It was no secret how miserable Brian was without his wife and same with Kevin. I needed my own space as did Howie. Nick was the only one who wanted things to stay as they were. So of course it came as no shock that on the eve of us all moving out into our own places Nick just stayed where he was.
Don’t ask me why but for some reason, I asked him to move in with me until he got a place of his own. Maybe in a way I felt guilty for telling him to go for Paris in the first place. I guess in relation to the other guys, I still didn’t see the big deal about him dating her. She still seemed nice but I wasn’t crazy about the way he suddenly became a mister party boy. He was really partying a lot and that scared me. Maybe I just wanted to keep an eye on him but now I was having second thoughts.
“Come on jerkass let’s go I’m tired and need my bed!” I decided to say out loud while looking at the clock and seeing 4 am staring me in the face.
“You are so dead Carter…SO dead!”
I told him to stay at her place but he was so shit faced drunk I don’t think he even heard me. Finally I heard voices coming towards the door, very loud voices. I stood up, sighed and made my way over to the front door where I found two people helping Nick walk.
“Fantastic” I mumbled as they helped him inside and nodded at me. I had never seen them before. Is he asking for random rides home from strangers now?
He grabbed me in a hug, the smell of alcohol so strong on his breath I found myself craving it. “AJ my man…I love you.”
“You need to get to bed Nick, who were those people who brought you home?”
“My friends, I have a lot of friends.”
“What were their names?”
“No idea.” I shook my head as I walked him towards his room.
“Where is Paris? How come you didn’t go home with her?”
“She left me there man….she fucking left me there.” Now his happy I love you man mood took a dramatic turn as he just about started crying.
“Well, let’s not worry about it now Nicky…you need your bed and so do I.”
“Yeah bed is good I guess. AJ I love you man, thanks for saving me.”
“Saving you?” He grabbed me in another hug and kissed my cheek. Nick was very lovey dovey when he was drunk, but then again he was very lovey dovey when he was sober too. Sometimes I swear he was part puppy dog.
He fell onto his bed mid belch and closed his eyes, “Yes for saving me.”
I grabbed his legs and gently placed them on top of the bed and covered him with a blanket. I skipped the taking off his shoes part. I loved the kid but not that much. His feet stank!
As I walked out, yawning and rubbing at my eyes I looked at the clock again, “Happy Birthday to Me.” I exclaimed before heading to bed for a whooping four hours of sleep.
I arrived early to the studio with my wife and our son. Leighanne decided to suddenly become all domestic goddess and make a birthday cake for AJ. Sometimes I really did think we shared her. So in we walked with our little mini keg of coffee from Dunkin Donuts, party hats, (yes I did say party hats), and a nice coconut cake for the birthday boy. Naturally it would have been chocolate but only AJ would be allergic, so we went with coconut.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay and have cake with us?”
She grabbed me in a hug and kissed me on the lips, “No, I don’t want to bother you guys while you’re working. Just tell him I said Happy Birthday and don’t forget to invite him over for dinner tomorrow night.”
“Will do, love you.”
“Love you too.” I kissed her one final time and then kissed my son on the cheek as they both left for a day of fun and shopping. Not that I would call that fun but she would. Now I was left staring at this cake that smelled SO good. I had all to do to not reach over and stick my face in it. I have developed quite a sweet tooth ever since Leigh was pregnant with the Bayster. Maybe if I just stuck my finger in it, no one would ever know.
So that’s what I did, I walked right over to the cake and stuck my finger in it and that’s how my cousin found me. “What the hell are you doing Brian?”
I stuck my finger in my mouth, I mean why not? I was already caught. “Testing AJ’s birthday cake.”
“Testing it?” He shook his head at me and placed the newspaper he was carrying down on the table. “Looks good, did Leighanne make this?”
“Yup.”
“That was nice of her.”
“He’s not here yet I take it?”
“Nope, I was first.”
“Wow, you even beat out Howie?”
“Yes imagine that.”
“I think we need to start some kind of being late fine to get AJ and Nick to the studio on time. Think that will work?”
“AJ is usually good with being on time.”
“We won’t give him hell because it’s his birthday I guess…you don’t think that…” And there it was as always. That shadow of a doubt that lived inside of us all when AJ was late for something. We still worried about him a lot. I know I did, especially when things like birthdays or holidays came up. How easy it would be for him to have a relapse. Go back to how it used to be for him. I don’t think I’d ever be able to handle that.
“Good morning.” Howie said, entering with another keg of coffee from Dunkin Donuts as well as a box of treats. “Well looks like we have been giving them good business this morning.” He said when he noticed my keg lying on the table next to the molested coconut cake.
“A cake? You didn’t make that did you?”
“No Howie, my wife did.”
“Party hats?”
He looked over at Kevin who smiled without looking up from his paper. “Yes, we went the whole nine yards.”
“Guys I have a new song I thought we could try today.” Howie poured himself a cup of coffee and then handed the lyrics over to Kevin and I.
“Moving On?” I asked him as I read down the lyrics of the song.
“Yup, just an idea that popped into my head the other night.”
“I like the lyrics.”
“Thanks Brian, so AJ and Nicky aren’t here yet?”
I looked over at Howie and shook my head as Kevin grunted his disapproval. He’s been grunting a lot lately.
“Nick will never be on time now that he’s dating HER.” And I believe that was why he was grunting so much.
I’m not sure how I felt about that relationship actually. I mean from what I heard about Paris, I wasn’t very excited but seeing him happy made me happy and ever since the two of them began dating, there was no denying how happy he was.
Leighanne just about had a fit and a half when I told her about it though. She couldn’t believe someone could be blessed with such a poor sense of judgment. She’s right, Nick’s judgment sucks. It always has and always will.
‘Well speak of the devil,’ I thought to myself as he and AJ walked through the door. AJ looked great, eyes wide open and smiling but Nick was wearing sun glasses. I couldn’t help but shudder at the memory of AJ wearing them all the time and why he was.
“Happy Birthday to you!” I walked over to AJ and wrapped him in a hug.
“Thanks man.” He said as he looked at his cake and smiled. “Did our wife make that for me?”
“Yes she did.”
“Excellent.” He walked over and placed his finger in the icing and put it in his mouth. “Looks like someone already did that.”
“I know nothing…” I confessed, winking at him.
“So what’s with the sunglasses first thing in the morning Nick?” I asked when I saw how quiet he was being as he went for his coffee.
“Don’t know…just tired I guess.”
“It’s only us.” Kevin said as he grabbed AJ in a hug and wished him a Happy Birthday.
“Leave him alone, he got in late last night.”
“He is always getting in late isn’t he?” Kevin asked, walking into the booth to avoid fighting with our youngest member.
“What crawled up his ass and died?” Nick asked which made the remaining four of us laugh. “Ooh cake!” He stood up and walked over to the cake like a little child. I swear he has the attention span of a gnat.
I snuck one more look over to AJ and winked at him before mouthing, “My place tomorrow night.” He answered that with a lick of his lips and a nod.
We are SO gay!
I was so proud of AJ. He has come such a long way. I have to admit there was a time I didn’t think he’d be here to celebrate his 26th birthday. Not with us anyway. When he was at his worst, I was sure we’d be making that visit to a jail or worse yet, a cemetery.
I never let on to people how concerned I was, always trying to underplay it but the truth was it used to terrify me. What a dark time that was, I’m so glad we made it through.
“We still on for dinner tonight D?” He looked over at me and placed a party hat on my head.
“Of course we are! Anywhere you want to go.”
“I want sushi!” I had to laugh at that. I love AJ, my fickle friend.
“I think Kev is joining us. Do you know if Nick is coming?”
He shrugged at me, “He was so drunk when he came home last night Howie and to top it all off, he had total strangers bring him home.”
“Strangers as in you didn’t know them or he didn’t know them?” God I was hoping it was the first option.
“Would I care if I didn’t know them and he did?” Damn!
“Are you sure he didn’t know them?”
“We had a big discussion about it this morning. I lectured him as if I was his freaking grandpa, on my damn birthday.”
I shook my head and glanced over at Nicky as he sat sipping on his coffee and eating a donut. “Supposedly she just left him there and went to another place.”
“She just left him that drunk to get home by himself?”
“I’d imagine she was as drunk as he was.”
“Even still…” That didn’t sit right with me at all. This is a woman Nicky was in love with?
“My ass waited up for him until 4 am!”
“You are a good friend AJ.”
He gave me a nod, “I owe him a lot of those, I owe all of you a lot of those.”
“Just stay sober and that’s all we’ll ever need.”
“D, last night…when he came home drunk…I mean the smell just made me want some, just for a second or two. Nothing major, but still.”
“Maybe it’s a bad idea that he’s staying with you AJ.”
“No, it’s all good. I’m going to talk to him about it tomorrow I think. Get my ‘my name is Kevin and I’m going to give you a long ass lecture’ hat on and give him the business.”
I laughed at that, but once again I couldn’t help but worry about them both. He sensed that and pat my back, “It’s all good Howie. I’ll be fine and so will he. If he isn’t I’ll kick his ass. I’m going to go have a piece of my birthday cake, you want any?”
I nodded at him, “Sure.”
As he walked away I glanced over at Nick and caught him staring at me. When our eyes met, he looked away. He probably could tell we were talking about him. I decided to walk over his way and strike up a conversation.
My head hurt like a bitch when I woke up this morning, well more like when I was dragged out of bed and lectured this morning. For a moment, I could have sworn that Kevin possessed AJ. The way he paced as he yelled at me for letting some random people take me home last night. I just kind of nodded and kept my head down. The truth was, I had no friggin idea what he was talking about. I don’t even remember coming home in the first place. I must have been that wasted.
The last thing I remember was Paris and I dancing and making out. I didn’t feel comfortable about it. I’m not real big on the sticking my tongue down people’s throats in the middle of a crowd thing, but lately that’s all she ever wanted to do. So there we were on the dance floor and suddenly we were making out and I mean really making out. I almost forgot we were in public and briefly started to undo her dress, not that there was all that much to undo.
I swear that’s the last thing I remember. The rest is all one big blur, ending with me being lectured by AJ as I was trying not to puke on him. I hated when I had those nights, the ones where I couldn’t remember what happened. They seem to be happening more and more these days. I know that’s a bad thing, but what’s worse is Howie walking towards me.
“I feel lecture number two coming on now.” I couldn’t help but say to my cup of coffee as I took another sip.
“Hey Nicky.”
“Hey.”
“Are you coming out with us tonight for AJ’s birthday?”
“Maybe for a little while, I am supposed to meet up with Paris later on tonight.”
“Why don’t you bring her with you? I mean none if us have really even met her yet.”
“She didn’t really seem into the idea when I mentioned it.”
“Oh, well maybe another time then, but you really should make time for AJ.”
“Howie, I said I was going okay?” I didn’t mean to snap at him but the way he stressed the making time for AJ thing made me mad.
“And you have met her; remember when she went out clubbing with us?”
“Yes for all of ten seconds before she whisked you away.”
I felt bad but maybe Howie was right. In the almost two months Paris and I dated, she has barely had more than a miniscule conversation with the boys. I don’t even think she has met Brian yet, although he hasn’t really put forth the effort either.
“I’ll ask her to come again tonight okay?” I made sure I said in a softer tone as he was walking away. At least my snappishness averted a lecture.
“That would be nice Nicky.”
I decided to take out my phone and call her about it right away, I mean this was an important thing for me and we always did what she wanted to do. I’m sure she would return the favor.
She picked up sounding very sleepy, “Yeah?”
“Hey there baby.”
“Oh hey.”
“Listen, I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me and the guys for AJ’s birthday tonight. Then afterwards we can meet up with your friends at the club.”
She paused for a few seconds, talking to her sister before coming back to me, “Um…well it’s just that we already had plans. I kind of told everyone we would be there at 8.”
“I should go out with the guys.”
“I guess if you want, I mean I’m sure I’ll find someone to occupy my time if you aren’t there.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing…I have to go.” Then just like that she hung up on me. She’d have to find someone to occupy her time? What the fuck was that supposed to mean?
I looked over at AJ as he stood talking to Brian and Howie and rubbed at the back of my neck. I’m sure he’d understand if I couldn’t make it. I wouldn’t tell him now though, maybe later on after my headache went away.
She better not be fucking cheating on me!
I can’t believe that AJ was 26 years old today! Good lord I feel so old. I remember when he was just a child. Now here he is a man, a 26 year old man! I felt as proud as a father, looking at him eating his cake and talking to the other guys. Almost all the other guys, there sat Nick on a table off by himself on his phone. He was annoying me today already and it wasn’t even 9 o’clock in the morning.
I rubbed the sleepiness out of my eyes as I saw AJ walk into the booth with a piece of cake for me, “Why are you not in there and enjoying the party with us? Is it the party hats?”
I laughed at him as I grabbed the cake, “No, sorry…just wanted to come in here and do some things before I forgot about them.”
“Don’t be mad at him, I can tell you’re angry.” He knew I walked out because of Nick.
“I’m not angry.”
“Yes you are.”
“Did he get drunk last night again?” He hesitated, I could tell he wanted to lie but then he saw that I noticed his hesitation so he came clean.
“Yes, he was a little drunk.”
“And how many nights in a row is that?”
“About ten.”
I instantly felt a headache form on the top of my head. Ten nights of partying in a row and I’m not talking about go out for a few hours and then head home partying, I’m talking about staying out until the sun comes up partying. The same kind of partying that AJ used to do before I kicked down his door.
“I talked to him this morning about it. I think that’s why he’s being moody.”
“It’s all her.”
“He has to have a little to do with it but yeah, I’m sure she has some kind of influence on him.”
I decided to shift gears on him, I mean this was about AJ and not Nick right? “How has the day been for you so far?”
“Just a day, I feel a little older but not very wise.”
“You are still much too young to be wise.”
He laughed.
“I’m proud of you AJ…and Happy Birthday.” I stood up and gave him a hug.
“Thanks man.”
As he walked out of the room, I glanced over at Nick as he sat there rubbing at his neck. I wish I didn’t care so much, I wish he didn’t worry me so much. My life would be so much easier! Maybe I’ll talk to him tonight at AJ’s dinner. Or shortly afterwards, I’ll pull him away from the guys, make a suggestion we go for a walk and then just talk to him. Let him know what I’m seeing and how scary it is to me.
I nodded and instantly calmed myself down. We had a new song to record, a great one from the looks of it. I placed Howie’s song on the piano and went inside to gather the troops for our day of recording.
Thanks for reading everyone! This is my last update for this story in 2005. I'll be back shortly after the New Year with a new chapter. No complaining allowed, i'm at least giving you advanced notice and I have been SUCH a good girl with this story updating wise lol Blame Paris!
