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Chapter 102

He shoved the last piece of his sandwich into is mouth and stared hard at his phone. Why wouldn’t she call? Nick was dying to know what was happening, and he hadn’t heard a peep from her.

“It’s a phone man; people use it to call you.”

Nick looked up at AJ and flipped him off.

“You’re so dumb sometimes man, I swear,” AJ groaned as he started out the room. “Hurry up, if you’re late again, John is gonna kick your ass.”

Nick ignored AJ and grabbed his phone, flipping it open. Quickly he checked his voicemail again to make sure he didn’t miss any notifications.

Nothing.

Drumming his fingers on the table, he called Veronica’s name into the phone and waited for it to dial. He desperately wanted to get a hold of her before he left tomorrow, it’d be too hard once he was on the road to talk, and he’d be too tired after shows. Letting out a breath, he propped his head up on his hand; he’d just have to make time.

Nick frowned when the now familiar voicemail started to play, he’d heard it so much over the last couple of days, he knew it by heart. He waited for the beep and then left yet another message and hung up. Reaching down, he grabbed the duffle bag he’d brought with him and set it on the table; he unzipped it and pulled his laptop out. While he waited for it to boot up, he flipped his phone open and then closed it again, he needed to get a grip here. Slumping back in his chair, he let his head loll back.

The dinner last night had been nice, he’d been able to catch up with his brother and sisters and they’d all actually gotten along. They’d been able to bond over the mess that was their family. Nick hadn’t realized just how much he missed being around them all and everyone, BJ most of all, seemed to be starved for attention from him. Shaking his head, he felt sick to his stomach. He’d been so selfish these last few months and he hadn’t realized just how much it affected everyone else.

Sitting up, he looked down at his laptop, dialing up and then clicking on his inbox, his heart dropping, she still hadn’t replied to his emails. He clicked and brought up a new message and quickly typed a short message asking her to email him as soon as she could and then hit send. He wished he could shake the feeling, the nervousness that something had happened. There was no other way for him to get ahold of her; he didn’t have her Mom’s number or any of her friends’ numbers. Nick made a mental note to ask for them the next time he talked to her.

He groaned, he had no right to ask for the numbers though, it wasn’t as if he was her…he didn’t want her to get the wrong idea, he didn’t want to come across as if he wanted to keep tabs on her, cause he didn‘t. Nick closed his laptop and slid it back into the bag, gathering up his empty bag and crumpling it up and throwing it into the garbage can as he made his way out and into the studio.

“Ohh buddy, you just made it,” AJ grinned.

“Shut up AJ ok?”

“So, have you heard from Veronica yet?” Howie asked, scooting over on the couch to let Nick sit once he’d set his bag down.

“No I haven’t.”

“I’m sure she’s ok Nick,” Brian smiled.

“I dunno, I’m really worried. This isn’t like her; she hasn’t called or emailed me or anything.”

“Nick man, she just lost her father, she’s not just gonna jump right back into her old routine, it’s gonna take time,” Kevin frowned, “She probably doesn’t feel like dealing with anyone right now, it’s normal.”

“I know Kev, I know. It’s just…I want to know that she’s alright, how things are going. I’m really worried about her.”

“It’s usually you who doesn’t call back,” AJ teased.

They all laughed as Nick glared at them, a wave of guilt rushing over him. They were right he knew and now he knew how it felt.

Howie looked over at Nick, a small smile on his lips, “Why are you so attached to her anyway? She‘s just a friend.”

“Well fuck Howie; you don’t give a damn when a friend of yours loses their father? I care ok? We became really close while I was there.”

“Yeah, but you’ve never gotten this riled up before over any of your other friends,” Howie stated, staring at him intently.

Nick stared at him.

“So…how close did you two get exactly?” Brian questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Nick sighed heavily, shaking his head.

“Nick, you said you were just friends’ man,” Kevin said wearily.

“We are, but…”

Kevin rubbed at his head, “Nick…look, you’ve got to start distancing yourself from her. It won’t work, you know this. We’ve all been there and done it and it was always the same. Fans…they don’t understand, they don’t know us, not how we really are. It’s just too hard.”

“Fuck off Kevin!” Nick spat suddenly, standing and storming out the room.

He didn’t want to hear it anymore; he was so tired of it. He knew all of this, he did and he’d promised himself he would never do it again. And then he’d met Veronica.

Why couldn’t they see it was different, she was different. If there was anyone, any fan that he remotely had a chance with, any girl he would try to make it work with, it was her.

And that scared him.