He flipped the light on in his room and tossed his wallet down on his dresser, flopping down on the bed, toeing his sneakers off. It’d been a long day, meetings galore, one of which included the announcement that him and the rest of the guys had to go to Germany to work on the album and all that entailed at some point, and that management was working out the details and would let them know when they’d be leaving.
Fortunately he’d been able to hang out with his friends that night. After going from club to club, he was finally home for the night, or for what was left of it anyway.
Quickly he stripped down and headed into the bathroom to take a fast shower. Fifteen minutes later he emerged, towel around his waist. Heading over to his dresser, he opened a drawer, looking for a fresh pair of boxers when he noticed that once again, he’d left his laptop on. He’d forgotten to turn it off when he had gotten distracted by the girl he’d brought home and this morning in his rush to get to his first appointment, he’d forgotten to turn it off again.
Walking over, he sat and immediately clicked on his inbox, signing onto his instant messenger while waiting for his inbox to come up. After making himself invisible on the messenger, he started scanning through his email. It was near impossible to actually chat with anyone online, fans always found his screenname somehow and he ended up flooded with IM’s. He was damn lucky they’d started the option of being invisible. After deleting most of his emails, he set in to read the mail from his friends.
“Fuck, I gotta finish reading Veronica’s email.”
He sighed, he really didn’t like having to put it off as much as he was, he just had no choice. He was sure she understood, but still, it was important. Forgoing everyone else’s emails, he clicked on her email, opening it and picking up from where he’d left off last night.
… No, I’m not spoiled, I never was. I got that a lot. People assumed cause I’m the youngest and the only girl, that I was spoiled rotten. Nah, didn’t happen. My parents never treated any of us different. My Brothers picked on me relentlessly, but not as bad as they picked on each other. Really I mostly hung out with my Mom. Don’t get me wrong though, my Brothers weren’t that bad really, they were protective of me I guess, which is nice, but when you’re in high school and guys are afraid to talk to you because your football playing Brother threatened to beat them up if he “messed” with you, that’s NOT nice.
Nick chuckled, he knew if Leslie was in the same school as him, he’d have been the same way. Part of him wished he’d had that experience with his sisters, then again he wasn’t so sure he’d have been a football player or even had that kind of pull with anyone in high school. His time in school had never been good he’d been teased and picked on himself, he knew how it felt.
The divorce, does it still hurt? Yes, sometimes it hurts a lot. I’ll look at my friends and think, they’re so lucky, they don’t know how lucky they are cause everything can change in an instant. Part of me misses my parents together in a way. Then when I think of how things were, I’m very glad they’re no longer together. Things are just better that way. How long? It was six years this September. Hard time? Sure, sometimes I feel like a pawn between the two of them. Not so much my Mom, but my Dad has this way about him. I feel like he thinks I’ve chosen my Mom over him or something and that’s not the case. Though sometimes my Mom will say things about him and it just sucks all around.
Yeah I know what you mean about not believing it happened. I still stop and think, my parents are divorced, they don’t love each other anymore. It’s a weird feeling. Sometimes it’s like I can’t even remember things, ya know, like them holding hands or hugging or whatever. It seems like I can’t remember cause it’s too hard or something. Maybe because it hurts in some way.
Nick stared at the words his heart racing. It was almost like she’d gotten in his head and described what he’d been feeling the last few months. So he wasn’t the only one thinking these things, he wasn’t a bad person because he couldn’t seem to remember a time when his parents actually liked each other. Shit, his parents weren’t even divorced yet and they were already making him feel like he’d chosen sides, he hated to think it was only going to get worse once the divorce was final.
I guess that’s it for now. I hope all with you is well.
Talk to ya soon!
Veronica
He clicked on the reply button and quickly typed a response. He started to send it then stopped, did she have a screenname for instant messenger he wondered? Nick hesitated a moment before quickly ending the email and sending it before he could stop himself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Veronica chuckled softly, typing back quickly. It was one of those rare times her and Erin were able to talk late at night. Luckily she was off tomorrow she was able to stay up late like this. Unfortunately, she was getting sleepy, she couldn’t stay up late like she wanted to even on her days off, she was so used to going to bed early.
She’d gotten everything she needed to get done, so she could head off at anytime, but she didn’t want to. She enjoyed talking to Erin, now more so that they didn’t get to chat often.
Pinksneakers23: You still with me?
Freesialover: Yup, I think I’m gonna do one final check of my emails then head off, god I’m so tired.
Pinksneakers23: Aww!
Freesialover: I know I’m sorry, I can’t help it.
Pinksneakers23: It’s just as well, I have to work in the morning anyway.
Freesialover: Well ok, but stay with me till I leave.
Pinksneakers23: You got it!
Veronica clicked window open and clicked on the ‘check mail’ button. Blinking in surprise, she clicked on the button that told her she had one unread message. Hoping it wasn’t spam she waited for the page to load and scrolled down, her eyes widening when she saw the email.
It was from Nick.
Clicking on it quickly, she opened it and started reading.
Date: Wed, Nov 12 2004 1:15:40 -1300 (EST)
From: chucktaylor11@aol.com
Subject: Letter and other email
To: freesialover@yahoo.com
Whoa, sorry it’s taken me so long to respond. I’ve just been so damn busy. Really, that’s no excuse, but it’s the truth. Matter of fact, I just found out today that me and the guys gotta go to Germany for some album stuff, just don’t know when. I hate when they do that.
Ya know, a lot of what you said made sense about everything. I still think you should strive to get your stuff published. If it’s in your heart and it’s what you love, there’s no one stoppin you but yourself. Don’t let anyone hold ya back, you know what you’re capable of.
I tell ya, one of these days I’m gonna meet your brother, he sounds pretty cool!
I hear ya about your parents and stuff. I guess it’s nice to hear I’m not the only one.
Hey, I’m gonna get going but look, if you have instant messenger for AOL and wanna IM me sometime, feel free. I’m under the same name as my email. Drop me a line even if you don’t see my name cause I’m always invisible. I just ask that if ya do, please don’t give out my screenname. It’s just I always gotta end up changing it and I really like this one, I’d hate to have to give it up.
So yeah, I’d love to actually talk to ya in real time. I’m on right now and should be here for a little longer.
Hope to hear from ya!
Nick
Veronica stared at it. He wanted her to IM him. Quickly she clicked on the IM box.
Freesialover: Oh god Erin, he wants me to IM him sometime! He says he’s on right now!
Pinksneakers23: Huh?
Freesialover: He wants me to IM him, says he’d like to talk in real time! He says he’s on right now. I, what do I do?
Pinksneakers23: Who? What? Real time?
Freesialover: I couldn’t, I mean let’s be serious here. I’d make a complete fool of myself! Help me!
Pinksneakers23: With what?! What are you talking about? WHO wants you to IM them?
Freesialover: Nick! Nick Erin! He wants me to talk to him on here!
Pinksneakers23: He wrote you back?
Freesialover: Yes! Get with it here!
Pinksneakers23: Sorry!! You’re not giving me any info here!
Freesialover: Oh…oops! Sorry! Heh heh!
Pinksneakers23: ANYWAY…IM him.
Freesialover: Just like that?
Pinksneakers23: Of course just like that, you’d be crazy not to.
Freesialover: But…what do I say? No forget it, I’m not going to.
Pinksneakers23: Veronica you’d better or I’m gonna kick your ass!
Freesialover: Ohhh I’m scared. You’re waaaaay over in Indiana.
Pinksneakers23: So? That doesn’t mean anything. Just do it.
Freesialover: He probably wouldn’t even answer anyway, he was just being nice.
Pinksneakers23: You don’t know that. And if he wasn’t serious, he wouldn’t have suggested it. It’s not like you mentioned it. IM him.
Freesialover: No, and you can’t make me.
Pinksneakers23: Just do it. You’re gonna kick yourself in the ass if you don’t. Don’t be a wimp.
Freesialover: I’m not a wimp!
Pinksneakers23: Then do it.
Freesialover: Fine! I will. You just watch, he won’t answer.
Veronica opened her buddy list, added his name to it to find that he wasn’t online, or at least his name wasn’t showing up like he said it probably wouldn’t. Starting a blank IM she typed his name in the slot and then clicked on the inside of the box. Taking a breath she typed.
Freesialover: Nick?
Swallowing hard she waited and waited. Clicking back over into the other IM she typed.
Freesialover: See! I told you! Nothing, he hasn’t said anything.
Pinksneakers23: How long has it been?
Freesialover: About five minutes.
Pinksneakers23: That’s not long enough!
Freesialover: Just face it Erin, I was right. He wasn’t serious. He’s probably over there laughing at me.
Pinksneakers23: Oh stop! He is not.
Freesialover: Yes he is, and now I feel stupid!
Pinksnearkers23: Oh Veronica L
Veronica clicked over to the other IM and closed it out. She really was crazy to think he’d actually take the time to talk to her. She clicked back over to the other IM.
Freesialover: Ok, I closed the IM out.
Pinksneakers23: *frowns*
Freesialover: It’s ok, I’m not hurt, I was expecting it.
Pinksneakers23: You really don’t have a lot of faith in him do you?
Freesialover: Sure I do, I’m just being realistic.
Pinksneakers23: I can’t believe that after all this time, he’d just blow you off after he specifically asked you to IM him.
Freesialover: He didn’t blow me off he was just being nice. I appreciate it and
Suddenly a new IM box appeared on her screen.
Chucktaylor11: Veronica?
