The remainder of Alyssa's Christmas seemed to pass by uneventfully. Christmas dinner seemed to go more smoothly than the previous night, partly because she figured that Nick knew the drill by now. She was happy to see that by the evening her family seemed to be acting a tiny bit more warm towards him. Perhaps, it was only because they wanted to keep a close eye on him, especially after learning that he and Alyssa were about to spend the entire week together, but whatever the reason, she was relieved. Nick seemed much more comfortable and relaxed and that's all that mattered. In fact, he and Scott had disappeared down into the basement to shoot some pool over an hour ago and since then she hadn't seen any sign of him. It was a little irritating, especially because they still needed to sit down and have a serious discussion about this whole trip to LA. Of course, it would have to be somewhere private and with this many people in the house that seemed almost impossible.

She saw her opportunity when she heard footsteps coming up from the basement and heard Nick shout over his shoulder to Scott, "I'm going outside for a smoke. I'll be right back!"

Throwing a sweater around her shoulders, Alyssa headed out towards the patio after him. This was her chance to find out his true intentions for inviting her to LA. Taking a deep breath she stepped outside, shivering a little bit at the night air. Nick was already sitting outside at one of the tables, lighting up a cigarette. Sliding down into the seat across from him she cleared her throat. "Thought I might find you out here."

"Hey," he greeted as he looked up at her. "You don't have to stay out here with me if you don't want to. If you'd rather stay inside its fine."

"No, it's okay," she assured him. "I wanted to come out here and talk to you anyway. It's been so crazy today I haven't been able to steal you away at all. I just wanted to make sure that things were okay and that you're having a good time."

"I'm fine. Things are going great. I feel a lot more comfortable with your family today for some reason, but I am kind of glad that we're leaving tomorrow," he admitted. "I'm not used to living with so many people anymore I guess. Besides, I'm looking forward to getting back to LA. I haven't been home much the past few months, so it'll be a relief to at least spend a few nights in my own bed. And I can't wait to show you around. It's going to be a lot of fun."

Alyssa hesitated a second before speaking. He'd given her the perfect way to start the inevitable conversation, but she was still dreading it, afraid that she might hear something that she really didn't want to. "About that... I actually kind of want to talk to you about the whole LA thing," she started off.

Nick looked concerned. "What about it?"

Before she could start to voice her concerns about the manner, Alyssa was interrupted by the patio door opening and Stephanie stepping outside also with a cigarette in her mouth. "Hey, do you think I could get a light?" she asked Nick, completely oblivious to the fact that she was interrupting a serious conversation.

"Sure." Nick tossed his lighter in Stephanie's direction.

Alyssa glared at her sister, hoping that she'd take the hint, but Stephanie seemed to ignore it. I totally forgot that she's also a smoker. I should've realized that we don't exactly have privacy out here, she realized. Instead of leaving them alone, Stephanie pulled up a chair and joined them, which was the last thing Alyssa wanted. Somehow she got the feeling they wouldn't be having their discussion until possibly even tomorrow.

"So you're really going to spend New Year's Eve in LA?" Stephanie asked. "That sounds really cool. I bet you're going to have so much fun."

"Yea... It should be. At least Nick promised that I would, so I'm putting my faith in him," she answered.

Nick pretended to look insulted. "You will have fun. I'm not going to let you come all the way out to LA and be disappointed. I'll make it worth your while," he promised wiggling his eyebrows.

Alyssa laughed. Oh, I'm quite sure he will make it worth my while, she thought with a chuckle. It certainly couldn't be anything but interesting, she decided.

Thankfully Stephanie didn't seem to notice Nick's flirty behavior, because as Alyssa soon discovered, she had come out on the patio with her own selfish agenda. "Well, the way I see it, the only problem is that while you're out in LA for almost a week who is going to look after your apartment, get your mail, and feed your cat?"

Damn... I didn't even think of that, Alyssa told herself. Honestly, the apartment didn't need a lot of looking after and her mail could wait, but somebody had to at least stop by and feed Precious, unless she took her out to LA with her, but somehow she didn't think that Nick's dogs would take too kindly to her. "Uhh... I guess I could ask Izzy or Tristan to stop by and look after things."

"Izzy is pregnant, isn't she?" Stephanie pointed out. "You can't expect her to be hustling over to your apartment every day. Besides, aren't litter boxes supposed to bad for pregnant women or something? And Tristan will probably be too busy recording."

Alyssa sighed, knowing exactly what her sister was getting at. She had no choice, but to play right into her sister's hands. "So, what is your suggestion Steph?"

"Well, I'm not doing anything, and since Mom and Dad are driving me absolutely nuts and I have a bunch of friends in the city that I'd rather ring the New Year in with, I was thinking that maybe I could stay at your apartment while you're in LA and 'cat sit.' Please," she begged. "I promise I'll take good care of the place and you won't even have to pay me. I'll even clean up for you."

Ha! As if I'd actually pay her anyway, Alyssa thought, wanting to laugh. Was she insane? Alyssa wasn't even sure if the idea was a good one. Visions flashed across her mind of her coming home from LA and finding her apartment completely trashed, or even scarier an eviction notice waiting for her on the front door. "I don't know Steph. I appreciate the offer, but I just don't think it's the best idea. My neighbors probably wouldn't be too fond of the idea of a bunch of college kids inhabiting my apartment for a week."

Stephanie pulled her face into a pout. "Come on Alyssa! I promise I won't have any parties and if I have anyone over it'll only be like two or three people and I'll clean up after myself. We're not even going to be there on New Years. We'll probably wind up at a club or something. Please!"

God, she's almost as much of a whiner as Nick is. The truth was that Alyssa really did need someone to feed Precious and she couldn't afford to hire somebody to look after her, or to board her at a kennel for the week. To turn down Stephanie's offer would be a little foolish on her part. She sighed again. "Why do I feel like I'm about to dig my own grave?"

"So its a yes?" her younger sister squealed.

"Yes..." she grudgingly agreed. "But seriously, NO parties, got it? And if anything is broken or ruined you're paying to replace it out of your own pocket. And if I get one complaint from any of the other tenants it'll be the last time you even step foot in my apartment, got it?"

"Thanks Alyssa! You're awesome!" Stephanie told her, springing out of her seat to throw her arms around her. "So, I guess I better finish up this cigarette and then get to packing. I figure I'll just come back to the city tomorrow with you and Nick and stay over your place, so I can see you two off to the airport. That is if that's okay with you?"

Great, not only does she have to totally fuck up my opportunity to talk to Nick about LA, but now she has to make it so that we'll have no time alone beforehand as well, Alyssa realized. God, how she hated younger sisters. She exchanged a glance with Nick as if to apologize and he just shrugged in response. Unfortunately, even though it wasn't okay, Alyssa couldn't tell Stephanie that without hurting her feelings. Instead she tried her best to sound enthused. "Yea, sure. That sounds great."

Nick put out his cigarette and stepped up from his seat. "Well, I think I'm going to go back inside. I promised Scott I was going to kick his ass at Halo 2, so I better get to work on that."

Thanks a lot, bitch she thought, glaring at Stephanie as Nick disappeared inside. I'll never get to talking to him at this rate.

If Stephanie picked up on Alyssa's icy glare she pretended not to notice. She had of course gotten her way, as usual.

"Do you think they're ever coming up or should we send a search party?" Meg asked. It was later that night, well after midnight and her and Alyssa were sitting at the kitchen table, bleary eyed, waiting for Nick and Scott to emerge from the basement. By now everyone else had gone to sleep, but Nick and Scott had yet to come up for bed, and Alyssa was beginning to give up on her chances of speaking to him before she fell asleep.

"I don't know," Alyssa replied, stifling a yawn. "Last I heard they were breaking out the Xbox for a Halo 2 tournament."

Meg groaned. "The Xbox? Shit...We'll be lucky if they're not still down there tomorrow morning. Fuck this. I'm going to bed without him. If you're still up and happen to see him, could you send him up?"

"Actually I think I'm going to head up too. I don't have the energy to try to wait out an all night video game marathon. You know how men get with these things." Finally accepting defeat Alyssa stood up and stretched.

The two sisters followed each other up the stairs while Meg clicked her tongue. "I dunno Alyssa... You bring Carter home for a few days and he steals my husband away. Should I be afraid?"

"Yes. Be very afraid," she warned, stopping at her bedroom door. "I'll see you tomorrow morning ok?"

"Uh huh," her sister promised, nodding her head. "I'll definitely be up to see you guys off tomorrow. Night."

"Night," Alyssa repeated, as she stepped into her dim room. Closing the door behind her, she began to undress and change into a tank top and a pair of brand new pajama pants that she had gotten for Christmas. Was it wrong for her to be a little pissed off at Nick? Here, she had waited patiently for him to come back upstairs, so they could finish the discussion that Stephanie had interrupted, and he'd been downstairs playing video games all night. He probably knows what I'm going to say and he doesn't want to have the whole "where are we heading" talk, so he decided to hide down in the basement, the little bitch, she angrily realized. Whatever... If he wanted to be that way, two could play at that game. We'll just see what happens in LA when he starts acting all sweet to me because he wants to get laid, she smugly thought, as she lifted the covers off over her bed, before sliding between them.

With that determination in her head, she closed her eyes and began to drift off to sleep. She was just approaching that divide between consciousness and dreaming, when she could've sworn she heard the clicking noise of her bedroom door being pushed open. Shielding her eyes, from in the incoming light from the hallway, she picked her head up and could just barely make out Nick's silhouetted form between the shadows. Am I dreaming, or is this for real? she wondered, as she searched for her voice. "Nick?"

"Yea. It's me," he answered in a whisper. "I'm sorry if I woke you up."

"No, it's okay," she assured him, rubbing her eyes. "What are you doing in here?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to talk," he replied.

Ahh... So now he wants to talk, she noted. Well, she hadn't forgotten the fact that she was pretty pissed at him. "How'd your video game tournament with Scott go?" she coldly asked.

"Great! I kicked his- I mean it was fine," Nick quickly corrected himself, once he realized that she sounded like she might have been a little mad at him, for disappearing on her. Taking a step closer to the bed, he hesitated. "Can I?"

Alyssa didn't answer, but slid over enough, so that he could lay down next to her. "You know if my parents knew you were up here you'd be lucky if you could walk out of here on both legs tomorrow morning."

Nick smirked. "I guess that's a chance I'll just have to take." His hands reached over to wrap around Alyssa's waist, but she wriggled out of his grasp. "What's wrong?"

"I'm in a mood with you. That's what's wrong," she replied with a pout, rolling onto her back. "I thought you wanted to talk."

"I do," he insisted. "But you're the one who's being all cold and stuff. What gives?"

Alyssa just glared at him as if to say you know what you did. Nick sighed, knowing that the only way to get her to open up was for him to apologize. "Okay, so I'm sorry that I was downstairs playing video games all night with Scott. I just thought that maybe you'd want some time alone with your sisters without me hanging around."

"What was that? Did I actually hear the words 'I'm sorry' come out of Nick Carter's mouth?" she sarcastically asked.

Nick looked embarrassed. "Yes, you did, but don't say it too loud. It's not something I like to admit to very easily."

Alyssa was silent for a moment as she thought of what she wanted to say. "You knew I wanted to talk to you before about this trip to LA and you avoided me."

"I'm here now," he argued. "So, let's talk. What about LA? What's bothering you?"

She sighed, her intuition telling her that now was the time for her to finally ask him point blank about where the hell the two of them were going. "LA isn't what's bothering me Nick. It's us. Us in LA and what's going to happen. What happens every time we're together. Where is this going?"

"Where is this going, as in us?" Nick slowly asked.

"Yes, as in us!" Alyssa cried. "I've tried, so hard to be patient and let things work themselves out, but I can't do that anymore. I kept telling myself, okay the first time I was drunk and it was just curiosity and that's it. It won't happen again. But it did! The last time in New York, you don't even know how much I promised myself that I wasn't going to let myself wind up in that position, and it still happened! And the worst of it was that you got away scot free, but I was the one that had to deal with all the messy emotions. Do you realize that when I stepped out of that hotel room, there were actually fans standing outside? Do you know how that must feel like, to be messed up and confused enough already, and then have to deal with people staring at you like a whore? That's exactly what it felt like! Those girls had no clue what was going on, yet they judged me as if I was just another groupie in their eyes. I know, I shouldn't care what others think, but its damn hard not too."

Nick looked stunned at her confession. "Alyssa.... I had no idea. You should've said something. I..."

She held up her hand to interrupt him. "There's more. Spending this Christmas with you has been both awkward and wonderful. But when you kissed me on Christmas Eve it made me realize something. There's more going on between us than I think either of us realize. So, I've came to a decision. Either we try to decide where the hell this is all going or we just give up on each other. I can't just be your friend, Nick. As it is, I'm lying to my friends ... my family ... everyone I know, and I just can't anymore. I realize that you're scared Nick. Yes, I said it. You're scared. Scared of falling in love with someone again... Scared of it falling apart... Scared of being hurt... But that's the risk you take. Just you need to let me know what you want from me. Because otherwise you're just stringing me along."

She stopped to take a breath, stunned at how the emotions she had been fighting so hard for the past few months just seemed to flow out of her mouth in a rush. She felt as if a great weight had been removed from her shoulders. There... I've laid all out on the table for him. Now the ball is in his court, she realized.

She studied Nick's face for any sign of expression, but there seemed to be so many different emotions going through his head that it was hard for her to pinpoint exactly what he was thinking.

Nick's mind was racing, trying to process all of what Alyssa just said. He'd known all along that he was being unfair to her. She was right. He was stringing her along, his fear of commitment preventing him from getting too close. She'd also hit the head on the nail, when she accused him of being scared. He admitted it to himself, but no one had ever had the guts to go as far as to call him out on it. Her analysis of him had been so close to the truth that it was frightening. And now he was being forced to make a decision, one that could dramatically change his life. The question being, was he ready?

All he knew is what he felt. And Alyssa made him feel things that he hadn't felt in a long time, but the reality was that he couldn't start a proper relationship right now. Not with one more leg of the tour, still to go. But, he didn't want to lose Alyssa. If she really has such intense feelings, she'll wait for you, a voice in his head spoke up. Taking a deep breath, he knew what he must do.

"Lyss," he began as he pulled her body closer to his. "I really had no idea that you were going through this. If I knew that I was putting you through so much crap, I'd have definitely done things differently. I had no idea that you felt that way about me. Listen, are you sure you really want to get back involved with me? I'm pretty screwed up. I've got a lot of issues to sort through. It won't be easy. You'll have to be patient."

"I understand that you've been through a lot Nick," she finally spoke up, her head pressed up against his chest. "But I'm willing to help. I want us to go back to the way things were."

"I'm not sure if they can," he sadly told her. "Look, I know you're freaked out about this whole LA trip. I'd love nothing more to settle you and me once and for all, but we need to really think about how this could work. We live on completely different coasts."

"I could move out to LA. I bet they need teachers in California really bad. We can make this work!" Alyssa insisted.

Nick chuckled a little at her eagerness. "Before you pack your bags there's still the fact that I'm tied up with the tour until February at least. I don't want to start anything until I have all the time possible to devote to this."

"So what are you saying?"

"We're going to be spending every minute of the next week in LA together. I guess we could look at it sort of like a trial period," he suggested. "We can act as if we're a normal couple and see how it works out. If everything goes smoothly I guess after the tour we can talk about you coming out to LA... Permanently."

Now it was Alyssa's turn to look stunned. "Do you really mean that? You're not just telling me what I want to hear, right? You're sure about this?"

Nick took in a deep breath. "I'm not sure how or even if we're going to work out. This could be the best thing that could ever happen to us, or it could totally blow up in our faces. But like you said that's the risk you take when you choose to get involved with someone. I've known you for a long time now and I know that I can trust you. We've been through a lot together."

"So we're really going to do this?" she asked, still in disbelief.

"Yea," he agreed after only a slight hesitation. "Let's at least see what happens this week."

Alyssa's face broke into an exuberant grin. "I thought I'd never hear you say those words to me. This better not be a dream or else I'm going to wake up very disappointed."

Seeing how happy that one simple decision had made Alyssa, Nick couldn't help but to smile too. Was he really ready to do this again? To get involved with another woman? To face the risk of being used and abused? But this is Alyssa his mind argued. She's not that kind of girl. You were the one to fuck things up with her, the last time. He swore to himself that this time things would be different. He wouldn't do anything to jeopardize their relationship this time around.

"I just can't believe I finally got that all off my chest. Now I'm even more excited about this trip to LA. It's going to be perfect. I can't wait to tell everyone that we've finally figured things out and decided to give things a second try," she continued.

As Nick listened to her happy chatter, an uncomfortable feeling began to settle over him. Already this was feeling as if it was going to fast for him. It was a big enough step that he'd agreed to give things another try. He wasn't sure if he was ready to tell the world though. But Alyssa seemed so excited, and he didn't want to bring her down by telling her that he thought they should keep their relationship under wraps. He knew from experience that when Alyssa got like this, there was only one way to shut her up.

"Nick? Are you okay? You got really quiet there for a minute," Alyssa's voice interrupted his thoughts.

He plastered a grin on his face. "I'm fine. Great, in fact," he lied, lacing their fingers together. "You're right. This next week is going to be amazing." Before Alyssa could even try to get another word in, he pressed his lips down against hers.

Alyssa seemed surprised, but returned the kiss, her body instantly responding to it. As the kiss deepened, she found herself being rolled over onto her back, Nick's hands already halfway up her tank top. She pulled away a moment already breathless. "Maybe you better go back downstairs," she suggested. "Because if you don't leave within the next few minutes I might not be accountable for my actions."

"Really?" he asked with a smirk, moving down to nibble at her collarbone. "That doesn't sound like much of a bad thing."

"My parents are right down the hall!" she protested with a giggle.

"So? We'll be quiet," he promised as his lips set out to find the areas that he knew were the most sensitive on her neck. "That is unless you really want me to stop."

From the moment his lips hit the right spots, Alyssa felt the heat rising in her body. She found herself biting down hard on her lip, in order to suppress the moan that was caught in her throat. She realized that if they stopped now, she probably would have a very difficult time falling asleep. Besides, it was definitely a turn on to even be contemplating the idea of having sex in her parents house. "No... I don't want you to stop," she breathed.

"That's what I thought," he grinned, while his fingers went to work pulling at the drawstring of her pajama pants. It easily came undone and before she knew it they were being pulled off, his hands sliding over her smooth legs.

Alyssa helped kick them aside before reaching for the hem of the thin white wifebeater and pulling it up over his head. Her fingernails gently grazed down his chest before settling near the waistband of his boxers. Hooking her thumbs inside she teasingly began to play with the elastic while her lips sought his once more.

She was so involved in the kiss, that she hardly noticed her tank top riding up on her body and being pulled up over her head. She shivered as Nick wasted no time in trailing his lips down over her chest and along her stomach. With every moment it was becoming more and more difficult not to make a sound. When he impulsively lowered his kisses to her inner thighs she couldn't help, but to cry out, having to stifle the sound with a blanket.

Relief flooded through her, as she felt her boy shorts being lowered off of her hips. She had to admit that she was a little afraid that now that they had sorted things out between them, that the passion wouldn't be nearly as powerful as it had been. But just by the way that her body trembled, she knew that she had nothing to worry about. Tugging off his boxers, she found herself pleading, "I can't wait any longer, Nick. Please."

Nick grinned, not being able to resist just a little bit of teasing, even though he was feeling practically the same way. "Still think I better go back downstairs?"

Alyssa's cheeks reddened, "Shut up and just kiss me."

This time, Nick did what he was told. Cupping her chin, his lips came down over hers, as his weight shifted. Alyssa moaned into his mouth, the moment she felt him slide into her, her nails digging into his shoulders. With every movement he made, she was shocked to discover how close she was getting so quickly. As he ventured deeper inside of her she could feel her heartbeat begin to accelerate and the heat beginning to rush through her veins. Finally, she could no longer hold back, and she buried her head in his shoulder as she cried out. Moments later, she felt Nick reach his release and they finally both collapsed beside each other.

Alyssa was the first to speak, still breathing heavily. "God, LA is going to be amazing..."

Nick looked over at her, noticing the glow in her cheeks and the satisfied look in her eyes. It was pretty shitty, but he knew that at that moment she'd agree to do anything for him, and he was about to take advantage of that fact in order to get his way. "Listen, maybe it might be better if we didn't tell everybody that we're going to give things a second chance. I really don't want jinx things between us, so until I come back from Australia, lets just keep a low profile."

Alyssa looked a little hurt. "You want to keep us a secret?"

"Sort of. I mean we can tell a few people, but the less that know the better," he explained.

She sighed. "If that's what you really want Nick." Without another word she rolled over, so that her back was facing him.

Uh oh... She's pissed, Nick realized. This was going to take some careful precision. "Baby, it's just until the tour finishes," he insisted, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Then we can take an add out in the paper for all I care. I just want to make sure that this really works out first."

Alyssa looked back at him appearing deep in thought. "After the tour you swear there will be no more secrets?"

"I swear," he promised.

"All right," she finally gave in. "I guess I could keep this on the down low for a little while longer. At least now I know that this is going someplace."

"Thanks," Nick told her, dropping a kiss on her forehead. "I promise that after the tour things are going to be different. I swear to you."

"I hope so Nick. I really hope so..."