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Author's Chapter Notes:
I seriously can't believe that I updated so quickly, but I was just WAITING to write this chapter. Anyway, please leave feedback! :)
BLINDSIDED: CHAPTER 16


“Reassigned?! You’ve got to be kidding me!” Lucky exclaimed into her phone.

“No. You know what the ramifications are for working in this office. I think you need to be put on some deskwork for the next few months or so.” Lucky’s boss, Peterson told her matter-of-factly.

“But, sir, this just isn’t fair. I’ve worked my ass off on this case and you’re just going to give it to a new team? And just what exactly am I supposed to tell all of the people here that I’m doing?” Lucky asked, attitude dripping from her voice.

“I don’t know. My sources tell me that they already all know that you’ve been working undercover for the FBI.” Peterson shot back.

Lucky stared at her phone in absolute disbelief. “But … how … what … who … sir.”

“Lucky, did you really think that I wasn’t going to find out? I mean, I know you think you can trust those people, but I’m not so sure.” Peterson said and waited expectantly for Lucky to respond.

“You’re wrong sir. You are REALLY wrong. About not trusting them and especially about taking this assignment away from me. I’m not coming back to Chicago so you can forget that right now.” Lucky stood up from the couch and paced nervously in front of the television.

“Oh, is that so? So then let me think. Maybe instead of reassigning you, I should fire you for ignoring orders.” Peterson returned, knowingly using his superiority over her.

“You asshole. You wouldn’t do that. You need me too much. You know, to get your coffee for you. I’ll make you a deal.” Lucky said, trying to regain some control over this situation.

“I should fire you for talking to me like that. But you and your deals are always interesting Sullivan. What the hell do you want this time?” He asked, pretending to be only a little interested.

“I want to stay in New York. I’ll go on desk work, but only as long as I can work in the office here. And not only that, but with me being here and still alive, that’s going to be cause to draw Jesse out. Trust me on this sir, I have interacted in great length with him. I know my mark.” Lucky tried to convince her boss.

“Listen, I’m not making you any promises, but I’ll put a call into my contacts in New York. If they don’t have anything for you, you’re coming back here, period, end of story.” He said.

“No. I’m not coming back if you can’t find anything for me here. I’ll make something for myself here if I have to. I’m NOT leaving New York.” Lucky said, catching herself before she continued shouting into the phone.

Just as she let out a loud sigh, Nick walked in the door. She signaled for him to be quiet and he put the brown paper bag full of groceries he was carrying down on the counter and joined her in the living room.

Just as he reached her, Nick put his arm on her shoulder and mouthed, “Are you ok?”

Lucky nodded back and then returned to the phone. “Peterson, you just don’t understand the good that I could do here. So please make it work. Please, can’t you hear me begging you?”

“Yes, and it’s kind of pathetic Sullivan. But like I said, I’ll do what I can. I’ll call you back as soon as I have information.” Peterson said and without notice, he hung up the phone.

“Well good bye to you too.” Lucky said at the phone and snapped it shut.

“Baby, what was that all about?” Nick asked as Lucky fell onto the couch and laid her head in his lap.

Nick mindlessly played with her ponytail as she answered, “I’m getting in trouble with the boss. He thinks that the whole incident has drawn too much attention to me and you guys and he’s worried about it, but he won’t say it that nicely. Anyway, he said that he’s reassigning someone else to Jesse’s case and that he wants me back in Chicago as soon as possible. And I told him in no uncertain terms that I would be staying here whether he liked it or not. So now he’s calling the New York FBI to see where they can use me, if at all.”

“And if they can’t?” Nick stopped playing with her hair while he nervously waited for her answer.

“Then I quit and lead a normal life with you here. I’m not going back to Chicago permanently ever again.” Lucky said, matter-of-factly and sat up on the couch. “Is that ok?”

“It’s beyond ok. I want you here. I want you in my life. Hell, I just want you.” Nick said and pulled her close to him.

He kissed her lips and she relaxed against him. Running her fingers through his hair, she drew him even closer and then sat on his lap. He flipped her over so she was laying under him and his hands were moving over her sides.

As they continued to kiss on the couch, the afternoon sun was setting through the windows in the living room.

Nick looked at Lucky’s face and smiled. “You are so beautiful.”

Lucky blushed, but returned his smile. “Well thank you. You’re not so bad yourself.” She pulled him down again and kissed him, this time slipping her tongue into his mouth and licking his own.

Nick gave a small moan of appreciation and pulled away. “God Lucky, I’ve missed this. I love you so much.”

As if his words scared her, Lucky went rigid and did everything she could to move out from under him. He held her sides tightly and just looked at her confused. “What? What did I say? Baby, what is it?”

“Nick, I just can’t do this. I know it’s been a really long time since we’ve made love. Oh God, trust me, I know. I ache for you. But I … we … have to talk. I need to get it all out. You just have to listen. Please?” Lucky said and her eyes began to tear up.

“If you want to talk, I’m all ears. I just want what’s best for you, that way we can move on to what’s best for us.” Nick said reassuringly and got off of her to make her more comfortable.

Lucky got up from the couch and smoothed down her hair and shirt. She looked at him and said, “I’m going to go change into something more comfortable since we’ll probably be staying in for the rest of the night. Is that ok?”

“Yes, of course. I’ll go change too. I’ll meet you back in here when you’re ready. You know Lucky, we don’t have to go into this tonight if you don’t want to. I’m completely happy and content with just having you in bed next to me at night.” Nick said and stood up next to her. He reached out and framed her face in his hands and smoothed her cheeks with his thumbs.

“Thank you. I really appreciate your support and understanding and love. You’ve been really great to me throughout this whole ordeal and I’m sorry that I haven’t been the same. It’s just hard, you know? But anyway, I’m gonna go change and I’ll see you in a few.” Lucky said and abruptly turned away from him.

Once Lucky got into her room, she looked around at everything that marked her presence. She noticed her clothes spread out on the floor, the pictures on the dresser and her unmade bed. Before changing, she picked up all of her clothes and made her bed. Cleaning always helped Lucky clear her mind.

She picked out a lime green pair of cropped Victoria’s Secret PINK Brand sweatpants and traded them with the jeans she was already wearing. She took off the t-shirt she was wearing and stood in front of her mirror in just the pants and her bra. She turned around she her back was facing the mirror and turned her head to look at herself.

She carefully touched the scar on her back that was left from the bullet and the surgery to remove it. She remembered exactly what she was thinking when she jumped on top of Nick that night. Closing her eyes, she saw the flash of metal and heard the sound of the click. Then she felt the searing pain in her back and remembered her thoughts going blank.

Lucky opened her eyes and looked at the scar. “You don’t own me anymore,” she said and turned to face the mirror. “It’s time to move on.”

She picked up a white ribbed cotton tank top and pulled it on over her head. She went into the living to find that Nick wasn’t waiting for her, so she grabbed a box of matches from a drawer in the kitchen and lit the few candles scattered around the open space in Nick’s apartment. Soon, it was filled with a vanilla scent and Lucky inhaled deeply.

Nick entered the room and watched Lucky smell the candles. She looked so relaxed in her sweats and in his living room. He hadn’t seen her so calm since the accident. He smiled to himself before approaching her.

Lucky turned around and smiled at him, the first real smile she’d given him since returning to his apartment. She took in the sight of him wearing a pair of gray sweats and a wife-beater and said, “Nick, I am so sorry. About everything. I love you.”

Nick stared at her wide-eyed, almost as if he was looking at a completely different person. He didn’t know what else to say but, “I love you too.”

She practically ran to him and threw her arms around him, pulled herself up for a kiss. He willingly gave in and pulled her up so that her legs wrapped around his waist.

“Ok, hold it. We’re not going any further until you get everything off of your chest, ok? And by the way, I ordered some Chinese take-out while we were changing and it should be here any minute.” Nick said and walked Lucky over to the couch and dropped her into the plush cushions.

“You know baby, your tattoos look great.” Lucky said and lightly traced the band and sun on his right arm and the shark and Chinese symbols on his left arm. She smiled coyly at him and he just smirked at her.

“Lucky, don’t take this the wrong way, but what the hell happened to you while you were in there changing? I mean, it’s great that you’re back to being bubbly and sexual, but … this is so different from twenty minutes ago.” Nick said and ran his hand over the top of her head and through her ponytail.

“You know, it’s weird. It’s like I feel like a brand new person. I’m ready to share my entire life with you and I’m ready to move on with you. I guess I had a private moment and realized that my life isn’t defined by one moment, one accident, but by everything that has happened and is going to happen. It’s like, I can’t even explain it.” Lucky said and beamed again.

Nick was about to answer her when the doorbell rang. “Hold that thought,” Lucky said and jumped up to get the Chinese. She paid the delivery guy and returned to the couch. She sat cross-legged on the floor facing Nick and handed him his carton of beef and broccoli and dug into her chicken and shrimp.

“So, anyway, what were you about to say?” Lucky asked.

“I just want you to know that I know I’ve said it before, and I know that you’ve accepted my apology, but I really am sorry for making you feel like I didn’t trust you. I was just upset because I don’t know if you really know how much you leaving in the 8th grade really affected me with women for the rest of my life to this point.” Nick said from his position across from her on the floor.

“I’m glad you brought that up because that’s pretty much where it all begins. And your apology is accepted as long as you accept mine for being so snotty to you back them. I really did have a big crush on you, you know? But all of my friends thought you were a geek because you sang and stuff. But anyway, that’s beside the point.” Lucky said and Nick looked bewildered.

“You mean you really did like me? Here I am, all these years thinking that you, I mean you as Renée St. James, hated me. And I’ll forgive you for that geek comment.” Nick laughed and then looked thoughtful and said, “So why did you leave back then? And why didn’t you say anything to anyone?”

“It was so hard to explain back then because we were just kids. And besides, if I had said anything I would have gotten into a lot of trouble with the FBI.” Lucky said.

“What? Why?” Nick asked.

“Well, when we lived in Ruskin, do you remember my dad at all?” Nick nodded and Lucky continued. “Well, he was the District Attorney and they were working on this really big case about drug pushing throughout central Florida. Well anyway, I got home from school one day and there were all of these letters on my front doorstep. I picked them up and brought them inside to show to my parents. Luckily my dad was home when I walked inside and handed him all of these envelopes. There were SO many.” Lucky said and took another bite of her food.

“I think I remember my parents talking about the case because it was in the newspaper a lot. I used to tell them about you when they talked about it. I told them about the huge crush I had on you and how you wouldn’t give me the time of day.” Nick laughed and Lucky just shook her head in amusement.

“Anyway, in each of the envelopes there were threats from the families of the drug guys my dad was prosecuting. God, I’ll never forget watching the blood drain from my Dad’s face when he read each of them. He told us to just go on with our lives like we hadn’t gotten the letters and that he would talk to the police as soon as he could. Well, anyway he did and they told him that it would be best if we went into protective custody, you know, the witness protection program?” Lucky said.

“Are you serious? Are you still in it?” Nick asked.

Lucky, put her hand up and said, “You’re getting ahead of yourself buddy. I’m getting there.”

Nick nodded for her to continue and she said, “The day I came to school and accepted your invitation to the dance, I had no idea that we were going to be moving so soon. I was so happy my entire walk home and as soon as I walked down my street I knew something wasn’t right. There was a For Sale sign on my front yard and my mom was waiting for me in our family mini-van with most of our stuff all packed up.”

“So you really had no idea that you were leaving? And you really did want to go to the dance with me?” Nick asked. He just seemed so preoccupied with the idea that she could have liked him way back then.

“I mean, I knew that I was going to be leaving sometime soon, but they never told us the exact date or anything like that. And yes, I really wanted to go to the dance with you. I kept telling people that I wasn’t sure I could go because I was holding out for you. And all I really wanted was to go to the dance to feel normal again and not worry about the threats on our family. But like I said, we had to leave as soon as I got home from school that day. My dad had already left with my little sister earlier that day and we had to meet up with him in the middle of the night so we could start traveling together.” Lucky said and stared off into space for a second before collecting her thoughts again.

“Lucky, I can’t even imagine what you were going through. I just, I mean, I know what it’s like to leave all of your friends so suddenly, but not because I was forced to. I wanted to, I wanted to become a singer, but you… you had to, to save your life.” Nick said almost incredulously.

“Yeah. It was really hard. I mean, I know this may be hard to believe but I thought about you every day. Every single day between the day I left and the day I saw you again in the studio. You looked so handsome, so different from when you were a kid. But anyway …” Lucky trailed off.

“I thought about you too Lucky. And you really changed my perspective on women. I never really trusted them because I wasn’t sure if they wanted me for me, or because I was a Backstreet Boy.” Nick said and Lucky put her carton of food on the table next to them and inched closer to him.

She put her hand on his knee and said, “You changed my perspective on men forever too. Every single one of them had to compete with my memories of you. And you don’t think it was so hard to watch you grow up and become a man everywhere I turned? I looked at a magazine and there you were, I turned on the radio and heard the newest Backstreet Boy single, I turned on the TV and there you were either at a press conference, an awards show, or kissing on Paris Hilton. Let me tell you right now, I know we’ve never really discussed exes … but you have some serious talking to do to explain to me why you ever dated her. But that’s besides the point right now. Let me finish telling you what I need to tell you.”

Nick looked almost helpless because he couldn’t defend himself right then, but relaxed as Lucky started talking again. “Anyway, whenever someone started talking about the Backstreet Boys, I wanted to tell them that I knew you or that I almost went on a date with you, but I couldn’t because that would blow my cover. I had to practically erase my true past. My family is really lucky because we’re some of the few that didn’t have to change our Witness Protection identities multiple times. My sister and I never forgot our ‘back story’ and we just went along with everything. It was hard making friends and not being 100% honest with them. But I got really lucky and met Lily. She and I have been friends since I moved to Chicago.”

“Well, are you out of the Program now, or are you going to get into major trouble telling me this story?” Nick asked.

“I wouldn’t be telling you if I was going to get into trouble. About four years after we got into the Program, all of the families that my dad was working on were caught and sentenced to jail for life. So they released us from the Program and I had the option of changing my name back, but decided against it. The first person I told was Lily because I knew that she would be my best friend no matter what. She used to joke and call me Renée and when our friends caught her, she’d just say that it was my middle name or something like that. And she used to call me Renée when she had something really important to tell me or when I shocked her. That’s why she called me that the day you answered the phone.”

“You know, it’s so interesting that you’re telling me all of this because it seems so surreal. I mean, it’s like, I’m so glad that I got to know you as Renée AND as Lucky. You make so much more sense to me now and our relationship means so much more. I’m glad you decided to be honest with me.” Nick said and caressed her hair.

“Thank you. It took a lot.” Lucky said and smiled.

“So, is this how you got involved with the FBI? Through the Witness Protection Program?” Nick asked.

“Well, ironically enough, Peterson was the case manager for my family. We got to go into the offices if we wanted to and of course had to do a semi-annual evaluation on our progress with the Program. I used to be so interested in all of the workings of the Bureau and all of the cases they managed, you know? So I talked to Peterson and he said that they could use a file clerk for his department and I applied and got the position. When I was released from the Program and graduated from high school, I went to college and got a degree in Criminal Justice and a minor in journalism. Then, I went back and Peterson was working in under-cover operations, so I talked to him and trained for a little bit and he put me on his team.” Lucky explained.

“So how did you get assigned to this case?” Nick asked. At this point, they had both moved from the floor and were sitting on the couch facing each other, Lucky with her back against an armrest and Nick with his arms folded above his head and reclining on the opposite armrest.

Lucky moved from sitting across from him to extending her body on top of his and resting her head on his chest. He put his arms down so they relaxed against her back. She smiled to herself before starting to talk again.

“Well, actually, I had to fight for it. We were in a meeting and the case file came across the table and everyone wanted to go to New York for an extended period of time. But, I convinced them that I was the best candidate because of the position Johnny created for me as your assistant. The rest of the people who were really interested in the job were men, and that wouldn’t have made sense, especially since you never would have let any of them move in. And you definitely wouldn’t have put the moves on any of them; they’re not your type.” Lucky said and laughed against Nicks’ chest. He too laughed and she heard his heartbeat speed up.

“Yeah, you’re pretty much my only type.” Nick said and kissed her forehead. “I’m really glad that you can trust me enough to tell me all of this. I love you Lucky Sullivan.”

“I love you to Nickolas Carter” Lucky said and reached up and kissed him.

She pulled herself up along his body so that she was sitting on his stomach and kissing him. She held his head in her hands and kissed him slowly, passionately, lovingly. She ran her hands through his hair and he began to groan in approval.

“Come on Baby. Let’s be together.” Lucky said and Nick began to stand up. She hooked her heels around his back and he began walking back into his bedroom.

Just as he reached the door to kick it open, Lucky’s cell phone rang. Interrupting their kiss, Nick looked helpless. “I’m never gonna get lucky again, am I?” Nick joked.

“No pun intended, I’m sure. But I need to answer that, it might be Peterson.” Lucky said and playfully swatted at Nick. He kissed her passionately again before tapping her butt and sending her on her way to answer the phone.

“Sullivan.” Lucky answered, nervously awaiting Peterson’s news.

“Listen you little brat, you’re lucky that we’ve been through a lot together. I called up the guys I know in New York and they found something for you. You’re going to be working in processing in the Missing Persons Division. You start on Monday morning so enjoy the next couple of days off. Listen kid, I’m not messing around with you. You’d better get this right or your ass is gonna be yanked right back to the Windy City.” Peterson half scolded, half advised.

“Sir, you won’t be disappointed with me. Thank you again so much for this opportunity.” Lucky said and was about the hang up the phone when she heard Peterson begin talking again.

“Lucky, I’ll fax the Black files to you at Mr. Carter’s residence so you can keep an eye on them and I’ve already told your superiors in MP about your involvement with this case. Even though you won’t be lead detective anymore, I think you’re right that you need to still be involved. But listen, if this case begins to interfere with your work, I’ll take you off permanently, do you hear me?” Peterson asked.

“Yes sir. Thank you so much. It really means a lot to me that you trust me …” Lucky suddenly heard a dial tone and realized that he hung up on her again. “Oh whatever.”

Nick looked at her curiously and she practically floated past him. “I have a job, starting Monday.” She pulled at Nick’s shirt and seductively walked into his bedroom. She jumped onto his bed and said, “Now, where were we?”