Chapter 33- Too Close for Comfort
Alyssa had never felt so relieved to reach a car in her life. Her mind had been reeling ever since the moment her lips had pulled away from Nick's. The moments from when he had asked for the check and they'd finally arrived at the doors of his BMW seemed to pass by painfully slow. The feeling of his fingertips intertwined with hers made her heart pound heavily in her chest with anticipation. Anticipation of what exactly, she wasn't sure, but after the kiss they'd shared back at the restaurant her mind was racing with possibilities.
Nick reluctantly pulled his hand from hers and actually leaned over her to open up the passenger door for her. "Thanks," she told him in a low voice, a little surprised at his gallant behavior.
"Not a problem," he responded. Once she was safely seated inside, he slammed her door shut for her and headed around to the driver's side of the car. He took a moment to get settled in the driver's seat before inserting his keys into the ignition. "So..." he began, turning towards Alyssa. "Where to now?"
"What do you mean where to now?" she asked, sounding a little confused.
Nick shrugged his shoulders. "You wanted to hang out with me tonight, so you're in charge. Wherever you want to go and whatever you want to do is perfectly fine by me. You just have to steer me in the right direction."
Alyssa chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully for a second or two. He was leaving this decision completely up to her? It was almost too tempting of an offer. "So you're saying that we can do anything I want?"
"Anything. The night is yours," he clarified.
Alyssa's eyes lit up. She knew exactly what she really wanted to do; it was all just a matter of mustering up enough courage to do so. Her body was telling her one thing, but her mind was telling her something else. You're single for tonight, she reminded herself. Sean doesn't exist. Tonight is about doing what you really want for yourself. With that in mind, she took in a deep breath and painted a playful grin across her lips. Growing more confident, she reached up until her hands tugged lightly at the bottom of his tie, causing him to bring his face closer to hers. When he was close enough, her arms snaked around his neck. By now they were so close that their foreheads were touching. Before she lost her nerve, Alyssa aggressively pressed her lips up against his roughly. At first Nick's body stiffened in surprise as if he was completely unprepared for the move, but he quickly recovered and returned the kiss with just as much vigor. All the pent up tension that had been thickening between them so far the entire night was now being released full force. Hungrily, they kissed each other, their hands boldly sliding over each others bodies. Alyssa's mind grew fuzzy as his weight leaned over her, pinning her against the door as his lips zeroed in on her neck. She moaned lightly very aware of the feeling of his hand creeping up her thigh underneath her dress.
Meanwhile Nick's mind was already miles ahead, trying to figure out the logistics of how this could work. Between the extra space of her stomach and the damn console separating the two of them, he was growing increasingly frustrated. He was considering suggesting that they take it to the backseat, but there wasn't a hell of a lot more room back there either and he wasn't sure how comfortable it would be for Alyssa. As hot as the idea of fooling around right there in the car was, if anything was going to happen he wanted it to be in someplace roomier than the backseat of his BMW.
Sensing his frustration, Alyssa breathlessly pulled away as if she was reading his mind. "This isn't going to work is it?"
Nick just shook his head as he sighed. "We need to get out of here."
Alyssa sat up and straightened out the hem of her dress. "Your place is closer," she suggested.
He was a little surprised at how she'd taken charge of the situation like that, but did little to argue as he wasted no time in starting up the engine. "My place it is then."
He peeled out of the restaurant's parking lot, anxious to get back to his place and continue what they had just started. He'd only been driving a short while when he felt the warm feeling of a hand creeping up his thigh. He turned and looked over at Alyssa who was devilishly smirking back at him. His hands gripped the steering wheel tighter, choosing to ignore the obvious presence of her hand. Seeing that she wasn't getting much of a reaction out of him, Alyssa lightly began to rub her thumb along the top of his leg. Nick tried his best to ignore the sensation, but found that after only about five minutes it was beginning to drive him crazy. His foot accelerated on the gas. In his mind, he couldn't get home fast enough.
"Slow down there. We want to make it one piece, right?" Alyssa asked as her hand slid further up his thigh. Her tone was low and seductive and very enticing. Although he was enjoying this unfamiliar side of her, he sill estimated that they had a good fifteen to twenty minute ride ahead of them. There was no way that he'd be able to control himself for that long if she kept this up.
Slowing down at a red light he placed his hand over hers and gently pulled it off of his leg. Alyssa's expression immediately changed into one of uncertainty. "Did I do something wrong?" It was evident that she was afraid that she'd come on to strong or something.
Nick just laughed. "Not at all. Quite the opposite in fact." His face flushed a little bit. "Just we still got a bit of a ride ahead of us..."
Finally realizing the effect that she was having on him, Alyssa felt her cheeks beginning to turn crimson. "I got it. Sorry," she apologized, pulling her hand away. There was a tense, uncomfortable silence between them for a few minutes until Alyssa broke it, grinning up at him. "You know what this reminds me of?"
"What?" Nick asked.
"Remember when I was living in New York City and you came to visit for the weekend when my car got stolen? We went out to that bar and I got pretty wasted," she reminisced.
"How could I forget? That was the night we..." His voice trailed off not exactly sure how to describe what had happened between them that night.
"First hooked up after our break up?" she finished for him.
"Yea... That." He sighed and grinned at the memory that had transpired four years ago. Even though it had set in motion the same chain of events that not only destroyed their relationship, but also nearly crushed their friendship, that night had been pretty memorable in his mind. In some respects he could totally see the similarities. Alyssa had been uncharacteristically aggressive then as well.
"This reminds me of on the way back to my apartment in the cab," she continued, forcing him to recall the memory. They'd had quite a hot make out session in the back of the cab and if it weren't for the driver arriving back at Alyssa's apartment when he did, he had no doubt in his mind that they'd have given him quite a show.
Nick smirked at the steamy memory. "Unfortunately, this time I'm driving, so things will have to be a little different."
The conversation died there and both were silent for the rest of the ride, but the tension between the two of them hung thicker than ever now that they both had a sense of where this was going to be heading. The two of them occasionally stole a quick glance at the other and it soon became obvious that both sides were growing restless. Of course this made the ride seem even longer. All Alyssa knew was that she was relieved when they finally pulled up into the driveway of Nick's home.
Not even giving him time to unbuckle his seat belt, her lips were back over his again the moment he shut off the engine. They spent a few moments exchanging heated kisses, but quickly found themselves craving more contact. The two of them broke apart just long enough to get themselves out of the car before heading up the driveway stopping every few feet to steal another kiss. Finally they reached the door and stumbled inside their bodies already entangled in each others arms.
Once inside Nick slammed the door behind them and immediately backed Alyssa against the nearest wall a little more gently than he would have liked. He pinned her there placing a hand on either side of her as his lips attacked her neck and shoulders. She let out a low sigh, her fingers already getting to work on his tie and tearing into the buttons of his shirt.
"We should take this upstairs," she suggested into his ear, already finding her position against the wall not very comfortable. It would certainly be interesting trying to figure out how to maneuver herself to accommodate her growing belly. There was no way at five months pregnant she could manage having sex in a standing position.
Nick just nodded and backed them into the direction of the stairs. They carefully made their way up in which time Alyssa had successfully managed to undo the rest of his shirt buttons. By the time they made it into Nick's room, she was already working on his pants.
Nick's mouth lowered to a spot on her neck as his hands wandered around her back and found the zipper on the back of her dress. His fingers fumbled with it for a moment or two until it easily fell down. Alyssa cooperatively helped push the straps off her shoulders, letting the dress pool at her feet. She kicked off her sandals before stepping out of it leaving her standing there in only a black strapless bra and matching underwear. Nick stood back a little wide eyed at her appearance as this was the first time he was seeing her bare pregnant stomach.
If Alyssa noticed his gawking, she completely ignored it. Instead she stepped forward, claiming his lips once again as she helped him remove the khakis he'd been wearing revealing a pair of black boxer briefs underneath. "We match," she told him with a smirk.
"What?" Nick asked sounding a little distracted by her appearance.
"Never mind," she quickly answered already growing impatient. Her arms hooked around his neck and she sank back against the soft mattress underneath her pulling Nick along beside her. She moaned lightly against his lips when their bodies touched as he scooted them up closer to the middle of the bed. Already her heartbeat was quickening and she was anxious to get down to business.
But Nick had other plans. His lips grazed down over her neck and shoulders as his hand reached around to unhook her bra. Alyssa shivered a little as the piece of material was torn from her body. She looked up to see his reaction to her new body, especially after she'd caught him sneaking more than a few peeks at her chest throughout the night. He did not look the least bit disappointed and wasted no time in reaching up to gently knead one of her breasts in his hand. She bit back a moan as his thumb brushed against her nipple. Seeing the reaction he got out of her, he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger until it hardened from his touch. When he was finally satisfied with it, he bent his head down and swirled his tongue around the hardened bud producing a loud, frustrated cry from Alyssa's lips. Her hands flew to the back of his head, burying her fingertips in his hair while his fingers wandered over to her other breast teasing the other nipple with his fingertips. He moved over to the other side, flicking his tongue against her causing her hips to jolt up against him. "Nick..." she impatiently pleaded. "Just get on with it."
Nick smirked, seeing that he was really getting to her. "You really want me to get on with it?"
Alyssa vigorously nodded her head, but Nick did nothing to move. "Say please," he told her, leaving teasing kisses between her breasts.
"Please," she begged, already trying to push his head further down her body.
This time Nick obliged, leaving a trail of kisses down over the crest of her stomach. He placed his palm flat against the middle of it, almost amazed at the change in her body since the last time he'd seen it back in June. He was so used to her flat, toned stomach with the naval piercing that she'd had as long as they'd first started dating. Now the piece of jewelry was gone and her stomach had begun to round. But most importantly, inside there was his child. The thought still completely blew his mind.
He could tell by the way that Alyssa was whimpering and shifting around beneath him that she was too impatient to share in the marvel of the moment. Taking pity on her, he lowered one of his hands between her legs, rubbing her intimately through the thin fabric of her underwear. He could already clearly feel that she was more than ready for him. He now understood her frustration and wasted little time sliding the garment down her legs. Now completely naked before him he dragged a long finger against her, causing a wave of pleasure to shudder over her. His fingers continued to stroke and tease her until Alyssa was unsure if she cold withstand much more. Her back arched and she gasped in relief when she felt the tip of his tongue plunge into her.
Her eyes closed and she focused in on the pleasure that ran throughout her body. She was finding it quite amazing how almost every movement that Nick made felt a hundred times more intense in her heightened state. Her breaths became more shallow and uneven and in a way she was almost glad that she couldn't see him very well over the swell of her stomach. She knew very well that if she did steal a glance at him it would stir up feelings that she'd been fighting very hard to suppress. This is only taking care of a need; she struggled to remind herself in her clouded mind.
Nick pulled away for a moment, replacing his mouth with his fingers for the moment as he looked over at her, anxious to see her reaction. Her gaze met with is for a split second, but before they could really connect her eyes quickly darted downwards trying to avoid eye contact. "Lyss... Look at me," he begged. Before she could turn her head again, Nick reached across her body, cupping her chin in his hand so that she was forced to meet his gaze. She froze once their eyes locked. The intensity on his face was so strong that it almost frightened her while his other hand was still in between their bodies, stroking against her. It was almost a challenge to see who would look away first. Alyssa shuddered as she felt a chill down her spine. Just as she thought that she couldn't take anymore, Nick broke the gaze and let go of her chin, switching it up once more. She could feel the warmth of his breath against her and the sensation was enough to make her toes curl. Her eyes closed again, but every time they did she could not get his intense expression out of her mind. The more she thought about it, the harder her heart began to pound. It wasn't long before she reached her release, so strongly that her body literally shook with the intensity of it.
She collapsed back against the pillows struggling for a moment to catch her breath, her body still pounding from the high that she'd just come off from. Nick's body hovered over hers, almost a pained expression on his face. "Lyssa... I can't wait any longer," he breathed. "I need you."
Alyssa just nodded and adjusted her position, sliding further up towards the head of the bed. Nick took this opportunity to shed himself of his boxer briefs, and within moments he was pushing her legs apart. Alyssa squirmed impatiently beneath him once she felt the tip of him against her opening. Then she made a very grave mistake. She pressed her arms against his back and looked back up at him right before he slid into her. At the same time, Nick looked up as well and their eyes locked again sending a shiver of her. She could clearly see the desire mirrored in his expression and the emotion scared her. She couldn't do this with him, not when things were complicated enough between them. It was at that moment that Alyssa knew that she couldn't go through with this.
The decision seemed pretty contradictory based on the fact that she'd already let him get her off not even five minutes earlier, but it was completely different. Fooling around was one thing. It definitely was still cheating and wrong for her to do, but she could separate the emotion in that and allow herself to believe that it was purely physical. When it came to actual sex though, the emotional connection that they shared could not be ignored. The act was way too intimate and as hypocritical as it made her seem, she couldn't put herself through the guilt of having slept with him again.
It was unfair though for her to back out now on Nick, especially when he was obviously very aroused and she'd already been taken care of. She didn't want to leave him high and dry and she definitely did not want to make a big production over the fact that she'd changed her mind at the last minute. Trying to play the moment off, she gripped Nick's shoulders and rolled them over so that he was flat on his back and she was straddling his chest. This isn't necessarily cheating; she tried to justify her actions to herself as she pressed her lips aggressively against his. It's more like returning a favor.
"Lyss, what are you-"Nick tried to ask before she silenced him with another kiss. He clearly seemed surprised by her sudden change in plans. Surprised and maybe a little confused.
"Don't ask questions," she told him in a firm voice. "Just relax. It's your turn now."
Nick's mouth gaped open as if he were about to say something, but before he could, Alyssa leaned over and placed a finger over his lips to silence him. "Don't," she repeated. Not giving him another chance to respond, her lips wandered down in a slow, tantalizing, trail of kisses down the front of his chest. She could feel his rib cage contract inwards as he drew in a surprised breath, but she knew that he wouldn't ask any more questions at this point. As her head bobbed down lower, she adjusted her body position so that she was kneeling between his legs. Growing bolder now that she was the one in control, her hand left its spot on the top of his thigh and her fingertips wrapped around him. A loud moan of approval reverberated from the back of his throat giving her even more confidence as she worked her hand up and down his hardened length. So far, I their few recent encounters, Alyssa hadn't gotten much of a chance to please him and she was eager to show him that she had learned a thing or two throughout their time apart.
She continued to stroke him while her mouth made its way further south, pausing only when she reached just above his hips. Her head shot up for a moment, sneaking a glance at his reaction. His eyes were closed and his lips were parted as he seemed to be struggling for breath. Not wanting to prolong things any longer, she lowered her head, and replaced her hand with her lips. Very slowly, knowing that she was driving him crazy, she took him further into her mouth, swirling her tongue around him. The frustrated groan that escaped his lips was encouragement enough for her, so she continued to work her mouth against him in the same fashion. His hands wandered into her hair, pulling her head closer to him so that she could slide him further into her mouth. He tugged lightly at her hair between his fingertips causing Alyssa to moan as well up against him.
Alyssa could tell that he was getting pretty close by the way his hands dug roughly into her shoulders and the increasingly louder and louder noises he was making. "Fuck... Lyss," he moaned between gritted teeth. Just hearing the way that he said her name was making her feel more empowered by the second. She moved her lips up and down him more quickly knowing that it wouldn't be much longer now. Sure enough, a few seconds later she felt his body quake beneath her and her lips pulled away just before he reached his release.
Nick lay there for a moment panting as he tried to process the events of the last few minutes. One minute they were just seconds away from having sex, but then she'd unexpectedly switched it up on him and he'd found himself on the receiving end of a blowjob. Talk about bizarre behavior, especially coming from Alyssa. He was not about to complain about it at all though. Based on just a few subtle hints he'd picked up from her recently, he'd gotten the impression that a lot had changed with her. He had to admit; he'd been very curious as to what a blowjob from her would be like now and he wasn't left the least bit disappointed. She'd never seemed that confident from what he could remember of her in the past.
His arm stretched out to his side wanting nothing more than to feel Alyssa's soft skin beneath his fingertips. He was disappointed to find her not laying by his side as he had anticipated. He pulled himself into a sitting position to find Alyssa sitting at the foot of the bed, looking strangely detached from what had just happened. She appeared more interested in scanning the ground for her clothing than paying much attention to him. That was definitely weird. Alyssa had always been the cuddling type from what he remembered.
"Where are you going?" he asked, pulling on her arm as she stood up.
"Getting dressed," she simply replied. "What does it look like I'm doing?"
"There's no rush," he insisted as he patted the spot next to him in bed. "Stay here for a bit."
Alyssa gazed at the empty spot of the bed warily, but gave in, lying back against the sheets. Her body immediately stiffened as she felt Nick's arms drape across her stomach, his palms resting on her pregnant belly.
"What's up with you?" he asked in a concerned voice apparently completely confused by her hot and cold signals.
"Nothing. I'm fine," she lied. "Really I'm great." In reality what had just happened between the two of them had confused her to no end. She'd definitely felt a very strong attraction to him and after this last encounter she wasn't sure that she could continue to lie to Sean for very much longer. They hadn't even had sex just now. Things were only going to continue to get more heated until they finally did. Alyssa was torn. As great as Nick always made her feel, she wasn't quite sure if she was ready to give up on Sean just because he simply wasn't there.
The feeling of Nick's lips against her shoulder sent her crashing back into the present. "When did you learn to use your tongue like that?" he asked with a sexy smirk on his face. "That was like a thousand times better than I remembered it being."
Alyssa just shrugged, glad that she was facing away from him at the moment. The electric passion of the moment was all but gone by now and her anticipation had now been replaced with guilt. So she'd had another argument with Sean. Was that really any reason to act the way that she had tonight? Pregnancy hormones or not, what she had done was still wrong no matter how good it had felt.
Picking up on her obvious lack of enthusiasm, Nick moved his hands to her arms. "Can I ask you something? Why didn't you want to let me have sex with you? I mean you had no problem with other things," he pointed out.
Alyssa sighed. She knew that this was going to come up and she hadn't wanted to have to explain it to Nick when she barely understood it herself, but she owed the poor guy some kind of explanation. She adjusted her position so that she was now lying face to face beside him. "I guess I'm scared," she slowly admitted. "I mean fooling around is one thing, but sex is completely different. I'm not ready to deal with that kind of emotion again, right now. I'm confused enough already. That would only add more confusion for me."
"But you want to? Am I right?" Nick prodded.
She shook her head. "I don't know what I want. My mind lately has been dictated by stupid hormones. One minute I want it, and then the next I'm upset and full of regrets. I'm not in the best position to be answering that question right now."
Nick lay back against his pillow. He hadn't realized just how mixed up Alyssa was feeling and the effect their relationship was having on her. The more time he spent with her the more he wanted her and the less desire he had for his own wife. It was different for her though. Sean wasn't around for her to compare both of their relationships with her. In a way it made the situation that much more complicated and volatile because it was much easier for her to simply use the fact that he was not there as an excuse for cheating. For the first time, he almost felt guilty for encouraging her, but then again that was his baby inside of her; not Sean's. Clearly that had to mean something.
He decided not to press the issue any further tonight though. For now he wanted to pretend like Sean and Shayla didn't exist and that they were a proper couple expecting their first child together. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and dropped a light kiss on her temple. "Stay with me tonight?" he asked.
She shifted uncomfortably in his arms. "I don't know Nick... It just doesn't feel right."
"It's late though. And quite frankly I really don't feel like getting dressed and driving you home tonight, so you're kind of stuck here," he argued.
He had a point there. He had picked her up, so Alyssa had no other way of getting home. "Fine," she sighed. "You win. You're such a baby."
Nick just laughed as he stroked her hair. "Go to sleep. You've had a rough week."
Surprisingly Alyssa didn't argue and her eyes shut as her head instinctively tilted against his chest. Within a few minutes her breathing grew shallower and Nick noticed that she had drifted off asleep.
Nick shut his eyes too, grinning a bit when he felt what he thought was the baby kicking underneath his arms. He couldn't help but to think that this was exactly how things should be.