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Author's Chapter Notes:
I know I know it's been forever, 2 weeks actually. I've been horribly stumped and now since I've written over a chapter today I decided to update! I'd like to thank my loyal readers for sticking with the series through thick and thin. You will so not be disappointed! I hope you all stay tuned! And I hope to hear from all of you soon!
Chapter Six: Listening Party

Alyssa gave Lindsay a hug and bid her farewell for the day happy that she’d chosen Lindsay to become her TA to help keep her office and work in order while she went on tour with Nick. She drove home smiling to herself getting home about 20 minutes later. She walked in greeting Layla taking her out back for a few minutes chasing her around giving her a good workout. She knelt down with Layla hugging her. “Hey you. You’ve been such a good baby today.” She said scratching her behind her ear. They headed back in the house Layla trotting behind her.

Alyssa changed her clothes deciding on a tight jean mini skirt, white spaghetti strap tank top with lace around the edges of the straps and bust. A light blue sheer long sleeve shirt to go over the camisole. She went into the bathroom redoing her makeup to look somewhat more like what she would do for a date. She lined her eyes in a silvery blue and used very little shadow then a little bit of her favorite orange creamsicle lip gloss. She looked and her hair tousling it and putting her diamond stud earrings in.

The largest stone at the bottom and the smallest at the top of the line of three holes in each ear. She smirked and slipped on her peep toed low-heeled pumps that had denim accents. She wanted to look borderline irresistible for the dinner date she thought Nick had been planning for her. She spritzed on her perfume lightly on her neck, wrists and backs of her knees like she always had giving her just a hint of the scent that she knew Nick loved on her. She grabbed her purse and headed out to her truck and headed to the studio. She checked her makeup in the mirror after she parked in the parking lot as the sun was dipping below the horizon staining the sky with oranges, purples and pinks. She got out of the truck and headed inside heading over to the chairs in the lobby. Alyssa stopped for a moment seeing Leighanne and Leigh sitting there equally dressed up. “Hey you two what are you doing here?”

“Same could be said to you.” Leigh said with a warm grin. “How are you?” She asked as Alyssa sat down with them.

“I don’t know right now, Nick said I’d be meeting him here for dinner tonight so naturally I thought we’d be alone.”

“Hence the fuck me pumps?” Leighanne replied with a chuckle.

Alyssa rolled her eyes and grinned, “Yes.”

“Whoa am I missing something?” They heard Kellie’s voice from behind them. Alyssa turned and stood giving Kellie a hug. “Alex told me…”

“Romantic dinner at the studio and listen to the album? Yeah Nick said that to me.”

“Brian said it to me too.”

“Same here for Howie.”

Kellie looked at Alyssa and grinned, “So have a good time last night?”

“Huh?”

“Ohhh you have the I got thoroughly fucked look going on. Thought I’d ask how it went. Not too quick since it’s been so long right?” Kellie said giggling.

Alyssa’s face flushed, “I’m not saying anything either way.”

“Ooh must have been really good for her to keep quiet.” Leighanne added with a grin.

“So I think we’re being ambushed girls. For them to call us all here?”

“Yeah I think we’re so in for it.” Kellie added. A few moments later Howie and AJ came out to get the girls. “Hey!” Kellie said happily giving AJ a kiss. “You didn’t tell me everyone else would be here.”

He smiled, “Best way to get you all here.”

“What promise romantic dinner and possibly sex in the sound booth?” Leighanne retorted making AJ laugh at her.

“Now that I would expect coming out of her mouth, not yours Leighanne.” Howie reasoned pointing at Alyssa.

Alyssa rolled her eyes at him, “Did he totally nark?”

AJ chuckled, “No I slapped him on the back, it was pretty self incriminating.”

“Alexander…you need to stop being so mean to my fiancé.” She reasoned as they walked into the room. Upon hearing Alyssa’s voice Nick turned from setting up the soundboard to the proper levels and effects they wanted to emanate from the four pairs of headphones. Nick grinned and looked at her seeing her outfit feeling his throat become suddenly dry and hoarse. Brian grinned and gave her a hug as they all greeted each other. Alyssa came over to Nick and gave him a short but sweet kiss. He smelled her faint perfume and suddenly felt a little dazed. He absolutely loved her perfume on her, it was subtle and sweet and at the same time completely added to her attractiveness to him. He hugged her breathing her in a little before she turned in his arms to face everyone and his arms rested on her stomach. “So when do we get to hear this thing? And are we really getting dinner or was that a load of bull too?” She giggled chiding Nick for tricking her into thinking they were going to be alone.

Nick chuckled, “Got food from Koi. That okay with you?”

“Did you get my usual?”

“Yellowtail and lettuce wraps? Yes.” He said with a grin.

“Okay girls into the recording booth, and headphones on.”

The girls went in looking at them strangely seeing four-swivel computer chairs set up in front of the microphones with headphones dangling from them. Alyssa grinned seeing Nick’s headphones and the massive amount of silver paint pen doodles he’d made over the course of a few years of using them. She sat and took the headphones placing them over her head, as did the others. Leigh sat to her right, Kellie on her other side and then Leighanne was next to Kellie. Nick grinned seeing Alyssa sit with her legs crossed leaning on one of the arm rests with her hands resting in her lap. Nick turned on the intercom. “You four can hear this right?” He spoke through the microphone. Alyssa grinned and nodded. “All right, we’re doing this in order of what the US album is going to look like, then we have some extras that are bonus stuff at the end. So here you go here’s track one.” He said simply cueing AJ to flick on the player in the soundboard computer. He hit play and four voices flooded the girls’ ears. Alyssa grinned hearing AJ’s voice. His was most definitely her favorite out of the band. She glanced to Kellie who was already beaming with pride that her boyfriend was singing lead in the short little acapella intro.

Alyssa heard the opening chords to the next song and grinned. This was the one Nick had been telling her about a few days before as what he had hoped would be the next single although Jive obviously had other plans. She listened to the lyrics and her foot bounced back and forth to the beat of the music making him smile through the glass. She loved the lyrics, how it so completely described their relationship before they had a real relationship when they were everything but what each other both wanted so much.

She listened through the first single grinning knowing the lyrics already and humming it to herself. The third track made her look at Kellie and make them exchange a silent conversation at how AJ was much more prevalent on lead than the last album. It made both of them extremely happy since they both adored his voice. Hearing Nick’s on the chorus made her grin slightly through her façade of trying to keep her composure.

Track five made Alyssa grin widely hearing the opening piano chords. Always a stickler for a great piano ballad she listened to the lyrics and looked at all three women surrounding her then to the four men standing out in the other room. The song could describe any of their relationships and how each of them fell in love with them. She loved how their vocals fit so smoothly together as they always did. She knew she wasn’t too happy not hearing Kevin’s voice as well. Sometimes she hated being able to so easily pick apart harmonies the way her music teachers and private piano teacher had taught her to do. She missed Kevin’s voice, but at the same time, how the four of them blended their voices to fit the five part harmony made up for his absence.

Hearing the second majorly upbeat track she sighed hearing Nick’s voice flood her mind. The lyrics made her feel like Nick was taking a lot of feelings they’d both felt for each other over the years. When they were friends she’d wished he really could be something different, anything other than the way he is. But looking back now she honestly couldn’t imagine what he would be like if he was different. The song seemed to emulate that idea in her mind perfectly. She wondered if the other girls could feel this way about all the tracks so far. How she felt them to be so completely personal to their individual relationships. Was it just her?

The next track made Alyssa sit up straight hearing the heavy bass beat and AJ’s vocalization over the melody. Alyssa stifled a giggle hearing the chorus. How many times had she seen the sheet music for this song lying around Nick’s office? She grinned hearing his voice talk about how she normally would tie up her hair in the morning to wash her face or just get ready for the day. She glanced quickly to Nick watching him watch her from the glass pane separating the two rooms. She smirked and looked away feeling the sexual tension he had felt earlier. Is this why he’d wanted to wait to be physical again? She didn’t know but she did know that he was so getting laid for this too.

The feeling of tension didn’t dissipate with the next song as soon as she heard the beginning her eyes widened and her and Kellie looked at each other with a “what the fuck is this?!” look on their faces. All four women exchanged surprised glances and grins as they listened to the gritty lyrics of a couple constantly fighting and nearing the end of a relationship. Alyssa tapped her foot automatically envisioning this song playing in all the clubs in LA not even needing some flashy house music remix to get people to get up and dance to it. Alyssa glanced up seeing Kellie and AJ locking eyes and grinning at each other. She snickered to herself knowing about the mental sex they were having at the moment. She turned and looked at Nick who was looking at the computer but kept glancing over at her for any reaction she may be having. She turned her gaze to Howie who was worriedly pacing looking in every few seconds to see their reactions. Then to Brian who was calmly sitting half on the sound board with just a very serene grin on his face.

The next song made Alyssa shift in her seat becoming more comfortable. She sat letting the words flow into her mind. Hearing Howie sing lead on parts, then the one line that Nick sang that caught her making her feel like her throat was going to close up and the tears sting her eyes. “You’ve been holding on so long, trying make believe that nothing’s wrong, not letting it show. There ain’t nothing you can do that could make me turn away from you…” She bit her lip and swallowed hard feeling her eyes sting. She looked down at her hands, the ring that rested on her left ring finger. She looked to her stomach remembering what she had lost and how much it had hurt the both of them. She looked up and saw Nick looking at her with a concerned look on her face. She faked a half smile for him trying to let him know that she was okay.

“Are you okay?” He mouthed to her. She nodded and took a deep breath as the next song started. She grinned hearing Howie start the song. She loved that he was finally getting a chance to sing lead on more than just one song once in a blue moon. Alyssa was really falling in love with the album, so far not one song on it did she not like or find something wrong with it. Everything was beautifully written.

The next song she felt Kellie nudge her with her knee. “What?” She mouthed looking at her knowing she wouldn’t be able to hear her anyways. Kellie’s huge Cheshire grin said it all, this was the song AJ had been gushing to her about that he wrote with JC of Nsync which made Alyssa tease Kellie endlessly about her boyfriend working with her favorite Nsyncer. When it came to the bridge Alyssa grinned automatically loving the upbeat yet slightly gritty ditty about a fed up boyfriend dealing with a clingy girlfriend. Alyssa snickered automatically thinking to AJ’s past relationships, most of them had been with rather clingy, crazy or just plain naïve women. Then she thought to the lyrics and how they applied to Nick as well. He’d had quite a few psycho girlfriends in his day all of which hurt him and he hurt in return. She felt lucky to be one of the very few sane girlfriends he had ever had.

The next song resonated with how Alyssa felt in the beginning of their relationship. As well as how Nick must have been feeling as well. Having to keep up appearances of a friendship while their love affair remained silent. The many sleepless nights they’d spent trying to figure out exactly what their feelings were for each other and everything going on in their lives during that tumultuous time in their life together. With her emotional closed-off nature, his open heart that always seemed to come second to her own personal fear of losing him. Alyssa snickered a little hearing Nick’s line about everyone having a first time. He was right everyone did. It made her think back to their first time together. How nervous she was and how careful and gentle he tried to be to make sure her first time was memorable and enjoyable. Would he have done that if he didn’t care so deeply for her? Wouldn’t he had just gotten what she was offering up and not cared giving her anything back if he didn’t love her the way he proclaimed that night afterwards?

Alyssa sighed feeling completely content to sit there for the rest of the night just listening to whatever they wanted her to hear. She noticed there was a completely new creative energy to the music that hadn’t been present in their songs or their voices for a very long time. She supposed it was because they finally got a bit more control creatively and were showing their true voices and talent as best they could. Her thoughts stopped when she heard the thirteenth track come on. She listened to the somewhat upbeat ballad about finding the one. Her throat went dry the second she heard Nick’s voice flood her ears on his verse. His voice had definitely matured since the last album. And the lyrics, Christ was he trying to kill her? It reminded her so completely of how she felt back in 2002 to 2004. When she was falling so hard for him and yet so unsure that he indeed was the one for her. It was beginning to drive her nuts how personal practically every song on the album was beginning to make her feel.

As that song ended and the other began Alyssa wondered if they hadn’t had gone through all the trials and tribulations of the last year and a half would there have been so much depth to his voice through every song? Even this song that was playing reminded her of their first weekend. The fact that no one really knew that they were together. And the line about fireworks? Hell that described exactly every time they’d made love past or present. Especially now that they’d strengthened and focused on their emotional connection it had only heightened the physical for them both. Or at least she hoped it was for both of them. She could tell by his actions and his reactions to her that it was true. She shook her head of her thoughts and continued on listening with the others trying to focus her mind solely on the music.

The bonus tracks began with a slightly upbeat yet melancholic tune that made her remember when she was walking around the house just after losing Noah. Or on her many runs to get her head clear of all the pain and angst she had been going through during that time. She hadn’t realized that Nick had been feeling the same or even worse. She’d closed off her heart to his pain, but he felt both of their anguish through that terrible time. Somehow that made her feel exponentially guilty for not letting him share his pain with her. She knew now she didn’t have to share her pain but that he needed to share his and never once did he complain. He stood by her, tried to get her to open up but never once did he consider his feelings to be more important than hers. In that moment of realization she looked up to him and gave a weak sympathetic grin and mouthed “I love you” to him. He grinned and mirrored her sentiment.

If that song wasn’t enough to over wrought her emotions the next made her begin to tear up. Her heart pounded hearing the pained lyrics of loss. She felt the tears begin to stream down her cheeks at hearing the chorus. She quickly moved her hands up to wipe her eyes and sniffled. When he’d found her cutting again she didn’t want him to see it, see what she had resorted doing to herself. Yet at the same time she just wanted him to leave, so she could wallow in her misery and pain and not have to deal with what her actions were doing to his heart, his emotions.

The second to last song made her grin and laugh a little through the tears the previous song had made her shed. Hearing the message that he felt so differently with her than anyone else. He may not have written the lyrics himself but the depth in his voice, the slight crack she heard as he sang made it clear that he was singing from experience. Their experience and that alone made her grin and lifted her mood more than she could have ever thought after the last two songs.

The final song all the girls looked at each other grinning. It sounded as if it was almost like looking through a photo album. Like the boys and the writers pulled all their photo albums and started telling stories and bam a song was born. Each of the women looked at each other exchanging silent approval and conversation at the work their men had produced. The effort behind each song was definitely present and Alyssa grinned hearing all four voices blend together almost effortlessly even though she knew it took hours upon hours of practice on each line of each song to get the harmonies just so. She’d seen how they’d worked on songs before just in rehearsals for the last tour and that in itself was a task and a half. So for them to be down one bandmate, and create such beautiful songs must really mean something her mind reasoned. The song faded and they came out into the other room remaining silent for the moment, awaiting the inevitable inquisition that they were all sure was to begin momentarily.

Alyssa saw Nick move to speak and she held up her hand glancing to each of the girls getting a nod. She took a deep breath, “Before you ask any questions, I have something to say that I’m sure the girls will agree with me on.”

“What’s that?” Brian asked with a hopeful grin.

“What in the FUCK has gotten into you four?” She said with a shocked expression.

Nick’s eyebrow arched and an amused grin graced his mouth. “How so?”

She rolled her eyes slightly and chuckled, “Okay, I’m going to say this once and don’t you fucking dare let it leave this room.” She said looking at everyone getting a nod of agreement. “Ya’ll should have kicked Kevin out ages ago if this was going to be the result holy fuck that was amazing.”

Nick laughed and moved to hug her. “Wow that’s huge coming from you.” Nick said breaking the hug making her giggle at him.

“Leigh, Kel, Leighanne what about you?” Howie asked with a sly smile.

“I love how you guys went for some more upbeat tracks but that everything is much more lyrical than before.” Kellie explained sitting on AJ’s lap. “And…I love the song you wrote with JC baby that’s fan-fucking-tastic.”

“Yeah I love how you all took equal turns singing lead this time around.” Leigh grinned happy that Howie had sung lead on a few of the songs.

“Yes, and you guys wrote some of them right?”

“Yep.”

“Well keep writing please they’re wonderful.” Leighanne added wrapping her arms around Brian’s shoulders from the side.

Nick grabbed the bags of food setting everything out handing Alyssa her tin foil tray of food sitting next to her on the floor using the coffee table as a dinner table. He leaned over and whispered, “So you really like it?”

Alyssa leaned over and replied, “I love it baby, I’m so proud of you. You do know you’re so getting violated for it when we get home right?”

“Is that before or after we pack for the flight in the morning?” He asked with a silly grin.

“After. You know me; I’m not waiting until morning to pack you’re lucky you got me to wait until tonight to start packing for this promo tour.”

“So I guess we better pack quickly then right?” He retorted making her giggle at him.

“Ah the hell with it we can wait ‘til morning to pack.” She whispered back before pressing her mouth to his in a sweet kiss.