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Thanks for reading, I'm glad you all are enjoying it!!

 

Sunday was a day of mixed feelings for Nick. First he would be ecstatic when Sunday came because the Sabbath was a signal of a weekend coming to an end, but at the same time he dreaded the long drive back home, putting everything back in the house as it once was, dealing with a tired and cranky Olivia, and making good of the mess they’d left for themselves to clean up on Friday evening. It was definitely not the ideal weekend that he would picture for himself; though this weekend had been slightly different than others past.

He had lost his manuscript to a rainbow of finger paints and Crayola inspired artistry, and he was somehow alright with it. He should have been furious and horrified at the loss of his hard work but instead he was finding himself with dozens of ideas brewing in his head, something that hadn’t happened to him in a long time. He was now free to think of something other than his original storylines and it was liberating.

The other small change had been his relationship with Holly. Sure, nothing had been really fixed and they weren’t back to the way they’d been before Olivia was born but Nick felt a tiny bit closer to her. The kiss they had shared on Saturday afternoon had lingered in his mind and he mentally kicked himself for not pushing things beyond just the kiss.

With a sigh he finished trying the dishes, and placed the final plate securely in the cupboard. He checked his watch, surprised by how tired he was when it was only ten. He could remember not too long ago when staying up until four in the morning was a regular occurrence. Now he was ready to pass out at the stroke of ten, but usually pushed himself to at least stay up to watch the news, and keep up with his favourite sports. Tonight though, he could barely keep his eyes open. No doubt Olivia and Holly were fast asleep, and he was soon to join them.

Up the stairs and into the bedroom he slunk, dragging his socked feet against the vinyl floors. With a yawn he opened his bedroom door, but the prospect on the other side had suddenly sobered him from his fatigue. He checked, and double checked, and was now absolutely certain that Olivia was nowhere to be found in the bed. This was unheard of, she always slept with them. He had never been sure if it was because Holly wanted to keep him away from her, or if she truly just missed her daughter’s company but for the first time in as long as he could remember there was no little blond head hogging his pillow. His side was in fact; HIS side.

He quickly walked back out of the room and crossed the hall, opening Olivia’s door. There she was sleeping like an angel with her hair fanned out across the pillow, her cute little face highlighted by a Disney Princess nightlight.

He quietly shut the door again and made his way back into his bedroom with a smile on his face. He could actually get a good night’s sleep now that Olivia was in her own bed. He couldn’t help but wonder though what had changed to make Holly put the girl in her room when she normally fought Nick on it every time. He thought about it as he pulled off his jeans and shirt, throwing them in the hamper.

As Nick turned back to the bed he suddenly had a Eureka moment, and his eyebrow shot up as if to question it, “Hol’?” he asked aloud, waiting for the woman to stir in bed.

No response.

He crawled into their queen sized bed, lifting the duvet slightly to see what Holly had worn to bed; if anything. Could she have been waiting for him to come to bed? He wondered silently, making note of her tank top and panties.

He practically pumped his fist in the air as he came to the absolute conclusion that Olivia wasn’t there because they were going to have sex. It was just what he needed, just what he had been craving, for weeks.

Sliding over in the bed he snuggled up behind her, slipping his leg between hers. She stirred slightly as Nick began kissing the back of her neck and behind her ear as his fingertips lightly brushed down her arm.

“Nick?” Holly asked sleepily, her confusion being mistaken for arousal to his ears.

“I was wondering when you were going to wake up,” he smiled, letting his hand under her tank top. He slid his palm across her smooth stomach before cupping her breast lightly.

“What are you doing?” Holly demanded, now completely awake and wondering why she was being groped during her slumber.

Holly turned her head towards him and he was shocked by the anger he found in her eyes. He had obviously made a mistake, “You put Olivia in her room… so that we could be alone?”

“I put Olivia in her room because I felt like I might be coming down with something and didn’t want her to catch it,” Holly explained.

Nick blushed though it was difficult to see in the dim light, “Oh.”

“Yeah, “Oh”, I don’t know what you were expecting but copping a feel while I’m asleep is pretty strange even for you.”

He wasn’t sure whether or not to be insulted by her words, but he chose not to be, “I’m sorry, it was wishful thinking I guess. I thought we had a good weekend.”

Holly’s expression softened slightly, “We did have a good weekend, but I have to go to work tomorrow and like I said, I think I’m coming down with something, so I’d like to get some rest.”

Nick nodded, “Alright. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Holly assured him, still feeling slightly awkward about the whole situation, “You can do one thing for me though.”

“Anything,” Nick’s head popped back up beside hers, wondering what she needed.

“You can take your hand back,” she smiled and motioned down to her chest where his hand had been frozen against her breast ever since they’d started talking.

“Wow, I’m embarrassed,” he chuckled as he slid his hand back out of her shirt, turning redder than he already was if it were at all possible. He slid back down in the bed, kicking the comforter away from him to stay cool in the humidity.

They lay quietly for a while, Nick on his back and Holly on her side facing away from him.

Suddenly out of the darkness he spoke, “Don’t you miss it?”

“What?” she asked sleepily.

“Sex…”

She sighed and Nick waited anxiously for her answer, “To be honest… I don’t really think about it that much. So no, I guess I don’t miss it.”

“Is it me? Do you just not want to have sex with me?”

“No Nick, you’re fine,” she replied but he felt like he was getting the brush off. Did she think he was lacking in the bedroom?

“I miss it a lot.”

Again she sighed and Nick was pretty sure she was getting annoyed, having been nearly asleep again, “Isn’t that why a bunch of men invented the internet?”

Nick turned to look at the back of her head, “Most women wouldn’t encourage their husbands to watch porn.”

“Most women are idealistic, vapid, idiots.”

Not all were; Alaina wasn’t, but he wouldn’t tell Holly that.

~*~

“Can I ask you a personal question?” Nick asked as he popped the top off of a small container of carrot sticks meant to be Olivia’s afternoon snack.

Alaina looked up from her tote bag and smiled, “Of course,” she nodded then returned to searching through everything for Benji’s fruit snacks.

“What would you think if you caught your husband watching porn?”

She couldn’t help but laugh, wondering where on earth this line of questioning had come from, “Did something happen this weekend?”

“No!” Nick immediately protested, “I shouldn’t have even have asked that because now I’m going to have to explain and it’s… embarrassing.”

“I don’t embarrass easily,” Alaina assured him, reaching up to quickly tighten her ponytail after having been bent over her bag, “There’s not much you could say that would change the way I feel about you.”

She feels things about me, Nick’s inner voices announced in surprise and he lingered on the thought for a moment before continuing with a clear of his throat, “Well Holly, that’s my wife, I’ve told you that haven’t I? Anyway… she appears to think that maybe I won’t be so focused on having sex in our relationship if I were to watch more porn. I don’t know… I shouldn’t be telling you this. I feel like a gossiping old biddy.”

“No, no, it’s interesting,” Alaina dismissed his apprehension with a wave of her hand, “You might think it’s an alternative way of thinking, that she is trying to free you of the boundaries of conventional marriage but I think it would have the opposite effect.”

“…the opposite effect?” Nick questioned with a raised eyebrow, “What do you mean? Like I would want more sex if I watched porn?”

Alaina did a quick look around to make sure no children or uppity parents were within listening range of their racy conversation, “Do you watch any now?”

Nick blushed and gave a short nod, “Not all the time, but I can’t say I’ve never watched it. I watched a lot more of it in college, but now… if it’s on at night or something… ok, yeah.”

“No need to be embarrassed,” the woman laughed at his self-consciousness, “You’re not alone! Anyway, you watch a little bit now and you still have a healthy sexual appetite but say you increase the amount by 100% and suddenly you’re watching it every other night, if not every night. So you sit around and watch a bunch of men have raunchy sex with girls who you only wish you could have. Then what do you do? You’re horny and frustrated and you have two options, take care of business yourself or head on upstairs where you have your very own real live woman to pleasure and prove you’re just as man as the wannabe actor with the twelve inch cock.”

“I never really thought of it that way,” Nick admitted, scratching his head lightly, “Though who is to say that I don’t already have a twelve inch cock and feel no need to prove anything?”

“No offence, but unless you’re a statistical anomaly and a bit of a freak I really doubt that,” Alaina laughed and Nick wished he had some kind of recording device nearby so he could get that perfect laugh on tape and listen to it whenever he needed to be uplifted.

He smiled at the thought and shrugged, “So you’re saying I should stop watching it all together so I won’t want to have sex?”

The older woman laughed again and shook her head, her long hair swinging behind her, “No! I’m saying you’re not wrong in wanting to have sex. When you have someone you shouldn’t have to be alone in the sexual aspect of your relationship.”

“So you wouldn’t be pissed if you caught your husband watching porn because it would make him want you more?” Nick wondered, bringing back his original line of questioning.

Alaina’s smile softened slightly and she shrugged, “No, but there’s always exceptions to every rule… some men prefer to be alone.”

“Where does that leave you?” Nick asked boldly, trying to read the variety of expressions on her face.

“Oh look! I found them!” Alaina’s smile was back as she brushed off Nick’s question completely and victoriously held up a bag of fruit snacks, “Snack time!” she called to Benji and Olivia and they came running. As she glanced back away from the kids her eyes caught with Nick’s and they shared a moment when they realized they were exactly the same, stuck in never ending disappointment.

~*~

“Would you like a piece of bread?” Nick asked, having just popped a loaf of garlic bread out of the oven. He sliced it quickly on a cutting board then put the pieces in a basket to place on the table.

Holly shook her head shortly, “No thank you there’s plenty of carbohydrates on my plate as it is.”

Nick sat down and eyed her wearily, not entirely sure how to take what she had said. She was often difficult to read, and this was definitely one of those times. He watched her swirl spaghetti around her fork with disinterest, “What’s wrong with dinner?” he asked defensively as he reached over with his fork and knife to cut up Olivia’s spaghetti.

“Nothing,” his wife replied earnestly, “Don’t you think we eat a little too much pasta though?”

He was confused, “I thought you liked my pasta?”

“I do!” Holly assured him with a frustrated groan, “You’re taking this personally and it’s not. I’m just saying we eat a lot of pasta.”

“So do Italians,” Nick shrugged, turning back to his own plate of spaghetti and sauce.

“You’re right, they do, and it goes right to their hips too!” she said, making sure to avoid any eye contact as she stared down at the bottle of parmesan cheese.

Nick rolled his eyes at her apparent insecurities, fully prepared to play the ‘tell me I’m not fat’ game that women often played, “You weigh like a hundred and five pounds, I think if anything you need to be eating more pasta to get some meat on your bones.”

Holly held back a chuckle and glanced up, “Thank you, I appreciate that, but I wasn’t necessarily referring to myself.”

“Then who were you… oh!” his confusion was short lived as he realized exactly who his darling wife had been referring to, “You mean me?”

“Don’t take it the wrong way,” Holly immediately began, “It’s just… I’ve noticed in the past little while that you’ve been putting on weight. Maybe this would be a good time to watch what you’re eating before it gets to be a problem.”

“How could I not take that the wrong way? You’re saying I’m fat! How is that not personal?” he asked point blank, suddenly feeling strangely uncomfortable as she gave him a once over. No wonder she didn’t want to have sex with him, she thought he was fat and disgusting.

“You’re not fat Nick,” Holly reiterated and he felt as though she were saying it merely for his benefit.

“Maybe I should go to the gym or something…” Nick muttered but Holly quickly shot him down.

“Gyms are expensive, we can’t afford that. Anything you can do in a gym you can do outside or in the house. You used to be really active just in your everyday life, you went for runs every day, and played ball, and just exercised more and now you’re a little more sedentary and it’s bound to happen but we’re both still young we have to nip it in the bud before we get older and our metabolisms start to slow down.”

“I am not sedentary,” he aggressively replied, “I spend all day chasing Olivia around, walking to the park, playing.”

“We play with Benji!” Olivia announced and Holly seemed quite relieved for the sudden break in the serious conversation.

“Who is Benji?” she asked, not having heard about a new playmate.

“He’s my best friend!” the young girl replied matter-of-factly, her blond hair bouncing as she swayed in her seat.

Holly’s eyebrows rose curiously and she sent a glance to Nick before looking back to her daughter, “Your best friend? How come this is the first I’ve heard of him?”

“He plays with us and Alaina plays with us too!” Olivia informed her mother.

“And just who is Alaina?” Holly chuckled, wondering why these people had not been previously brought up.

“She’s Daddy’s friend!” Olivia was now swinging her legs as she chewed on the corner of a piece of bread, oblivious to the blush that had suddenly formed on her father’s fair cheeks.

Holly laughed, “Daddy’s friend? Funny Daddy hasn’t mentioned having any new friends,” her words were laced with a sarcasm that would go by unnoticed to the pre-schooler but were undeniably clear to Nick. She was suspicious, and he didn’t blame her. He hadn’t mentioned Alaina at all and he wasn’t entirely sure why. It wasn’t as if he was trying to hide his relationship…no, friendship with the older woman because there was (maybe) nothing going on between them but he had somewhere along the line decided to keep Alaina to himself.

He chose to shrug idly and brush it off, “She’s just a woman from the park, not a friend really. When the kids are all playing it’s nice to chat with the adults, and it just so happens that 99% of them are female. I’m kind of in the minority. Nothing’s going on.”

“I never said there was anything going on, no need to get defensive,” Holly said but she was giving him a look as if she was trying to read his soul and he felt suddenly warm, “Why are you blushing?”

“It’s hot in here?” he suggested, “It’s the middle of summer.”

“You seem nervous,” Holly was suddenly intrigued in what had her husband’s panties in a bunch.

“I’m not at all nervous!” I don’t want you to know I think about Alaina naked and sprawled out on our bed. I don’t want you to know I dream of licking every inch of her.

Holly relented, her face breaking into a grin, “Daddy’s silly,” she said to Olivia and the little girl agreed, changing the subject to something else but for the rest of dinner Nick could feel Holly’s eyes on him, waiting for him to reveal his secrets.