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They arrived in New York a few hours later, to a location secured by K. Making their way through the door, they saw that Brian was already there. Nick frowned when Red immediately made her way over to Brian, shaking hands with him.

“Nick,” Brian said formally, giving him a slight nod.

“Hey,” Nick muttered.

Brian smirked before looking back at Red, growing serious. “I’ve been briefed on the situation, though I don’t know very much.”

“Neither do we. Basically, the victim is fine one minute and, the next, coughing up blood. It’s very strange.”

“Do we have any idea how fast it’s spreading?”

Red shook her head. “Not sure. There’s been a few cases reported, but the bouts don’t seem to last too long.”

“From what I’ve been told, we have no idea where it started from.”

“True, it just kinda sprung from nowhere. The really bad thing is, it seems possible that it’s airborne. Apparently, the staff treating the infected are becoming ill themselves. That said, the possible death toll could spike pretty fast if that‘s the case. I imagine that it’s going to be hard to quarantine if they have to be treated and the other doctors are becoming infected,” Red sighed.

“What about surgical masks?” Brian asked.

“They’re wearing them, and they’re still getting it. Maybe it’s just passed by contact, not necessarily through the air. That may make it a bit easier to contain, but…”

“Couldn’t they wear those cool spacesuit-looking things? Ya know, like what the astronauts wear?” Nick questioned, feeling decidedly left out of the conversation.

Brian smirked. “Sure, Nick.”

“No, no, he’s got a point; they do have those airtight Hazmat suits. Not quite astronaut suits, Nick, but I do know what you mean,” Red chuckled.

Nick smiled smugly at Brian, sticking his tongue out at him when Red turned away from him. Brian glared at him before looking at Red.

“So, what’s our next step here, then?”

“Well, we have to find out where this thing came from and how it’s spreading, aside from a possible airborne illness, although, to me, that’s bad enough. If it’s spread through actual physical contact, which I’m hoping for...”

Nick blanched; the whole thing just sucked. Looking around suddenly, Nick felt like he could get sick any second. Who knew; he felt fine now, but the next, he could be hurling like the morning after a good party. He sighed sadly. What he wouldn’t give to be at a party right now, the drinks sliding smoothly down his throat, the ladies all lining up for a chance with him, and…

“Uhh, Nick, your phone is ringing,” Red announced.

“Huh? Oh, damn,” Nick mumbled, reaching into his pocket to pull his phone out. He looked at the ID, and his face lit up. “Di!”

“Hey, Nick! How’s it going?”

“Great, now that I’m talking to you.”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“So what’s up?”

“Nothing, I just wanted to touch base with you, see how things were going.”

“We’re just looking into a few things here. How are things with you?”

“Great! I’m really excited to be working with Vitruvian.”

Nick frowned. “Ya know, I’m really upset about this.”

“About what?”

“The fact that we never get to be on a mission together.”

“Nick, we’ve been on missions together; don’t say that.”

“But not enough, Di. Nowhere near enough. Don’t you know I need copious amounts of Diamonds to make me a happy boy?”

“Copious? Are you serious, Nick?”

“What? It’s true, I do. I’m miserable. Diamonds aren’t just a girl’s best friend, ya know,” he said softly. “Oh wow, I have to get off this phone right now. This is just sad.”

“It is not. If you need Diamonds to make you happy, Nick, there’s something seriously wrong with you. Besides, leave that to us ladies, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Nick sighed.

“Aww, don’t sound so sad. I’m sure we’ll be on a mission together soon.”

“It would be nice if I believed that you honestly wanted it, if you sounded sincerely upset.”

Diamond chuckled. “I’m hurting on the inside, Nick, trust me.”

Before Nick could respond, he heard a male voice in the background call out, “Oh, Di-Di!” He recognized it immediately as Leo’s, and he scowled at his phone.

“I gotta go, Nick,” Diamond said, causing Nick to refocus his thoughts away from Leo Di-Crapio and how much he detested the new 00-Agent. “Leo’s here to take me out to dinner,” she giggled, and Nick rolled his eyes. “He’s so sweet! You know I can’t resist a luxurious night out.”

“I know something else you can’t resist…” Nick replied, hoping to bring her attention back to him before his anger towards Leo could get the best of him.

“Me too.” Diamond giggled again. “Coming, Leo!”

Nick pulled the phone away from his ear as he heard a click, and the flashing numbers on the screen confirmed that she had ended their conversation. He walked back over towards Red and Brian, who eyed him curiously, and only stopped long enough to pick up his duffel bag. “Let’s go! Now!” he called over his shoulder to them, as he angrily shoved the door open, letting it slam shut as he walked outside. Brian and Red looked at each other for a moment, before hastily catching up to Nick. He was leaned up against the driver’s side door of his car, sunglasses reflecting the sunlight as he looked up and watched Red and Brian walk over to him.

“Are you alright, Nick?” Red asked as she tossed her bag into the trunk. It didn’t take a lot of perception to notice that his conversation with Diamond had ruffled his feathers.

“I’m fine,” he muttered, flashing her a smile in the hope that it would keep her from asking him any more questions about his bad mood. Once they had all stashed away their suitcases and gotten into the car, Nick silently turned the key in the ignition and felt his heart pump faster as he pressed his foot down on the gas pedal and the car shot off towards the highway.

An hour or so later, they finally crossed over into Canada and were well on their way to meeting up with Red’s friend, Jeanie Boulet, in Toronto. Red was informing Nick and Brian about the possible procedures they would encounter once they got there, to keep their chances of being infected with the virus as low as possible.

Nick knew he should have been paying more attention to what Red was telling them, but his mind kept drifting off to thoughts of Diamond.

“Nick…” Red trailed off, worry in her voice.

Nick ignored her as his thoughts continued, and at that moment, he happened to glance at a sign that said “SPEED LIMIT: 100 KPH.” Figuring the “K” in “KPH” probably stood for some Canadian word for “miles,” Nick contentedly continued pressing down on the gas pedal, and the car sped up immensely as it weaved through the traffic. Images kept running through his mind. Diamond and Leo. Diamond sipping champagne while Leo fed her strawberries. “Damnit!” he exclaimed, unaware that he was now vocalizing his frustrations. “I fucking hate that Leo dude.”

“Um, Nick…?” Red again tried to catch Nick’s attention before he spoke again. She could tell that he was only getting started on his tirade.

“Who does he think he is?” Nick continued, still ignoring Red. She and Brian exchanged a concerned glance before both turning their attention back to the driver of the car. “’Oh Di-Di!’” Nick said in a mocking tone, scrunching his face into an exaggerated sneer. “What a dumbass girly nickname! Di-Di. Even Lancy would think that’s too frilly.”

“Nick!” Brian exclaimed.

“And his nickname, what the hell is up with that? Vitruvian.” Nick’s face twisted with disdain. “It’s fucking retarded, that’s what it is. ‘Work of art,’ my ass. He’s a piece of work, alright!” Nick growled. “I bet she’s wearing that low-cut pink dress she wore the first time I took her out.”

“Damnit, Nick!” Brian again tried to snap Nick out of his angry stupor. He was really starting to get annoyed with Nick now, especially since he had hardly any idea who Nick was even talking about. Red frowned as she watched Nick closely; his knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so tightly, and his muscles were all tense with rage. What concerned her most was that he didn’t seem to be paying any attention at all to the road in front of him.

“And I know all the tricks she’s probably using on him, too. And that little creep’s gotta have moves of his own, too-”

“NICK!” Red and Brian finally shouted in unison.

“WHAT?!” Nick hollered back at them. Did they have to yell at him? It was bad enough they were interrupting his train of thought. As he looked back at the road, he realized why Red and Brian had been so eager to get his attention that they were screaming – the cars on the road were coming straight at them, horns honking at him as the drivers angrily cursed him as they passed by. “Oh shit!”

“Nick, look out!” Brian exclaimed, as an eighteen-wheeler semi came barreling towards them. They all screamed as Nick tried to steer past it, but was unable to get far enough out of the way. Suddenly, the wheel began to turn frantically in Nick’s hands, causing the car to swerve off the road and, ultimately, crash into a tree.

Nick peered over at Red in the passenger’s seat and at Brian in the backseat, grateful that they were all unharmed. Nick suspected that Pearl had equipped the car with more than enough airbags than it needed to protect its passengers from serious injury, but wasn’t even about to try to figure out how she rigged it to steer itself away from huge-ass trucks. Too bad it didn’t get out of the way of the tree, too.

Everyone slowly got out of the car and brushed themselves off, and once they had all caught their breath, Brian swiftly smacked Nick in the back of the head.

“Ow! What the hell was that for?”

“You idiot, you almost got us KILLED!” Brian shouted.

“But… I was on the opposite side of the road like I should have been!”

“That’s ENGLAND, you dummy! England, ya DILDO!”

Nick stared blankly, processing this new information for a few moments. All he could do was blink before he calmly let his thoughts slip out once more. “Brian… just called me a dildo…”

Red shook her head and pressed it into her palm as the three of them heard a police siren approach, and the police car it belonged came to a stop a few feet away from them. The police officer slowly got out of his car, and Nick was actually surprised that he was dressed like an American police officer; he always thought that Canadian police all dressed up like Dudley Do-Right.

“Hey there,” the officer said with a slight tip of his hat. “Which one of you was the driver of this vehicle?”

Nick stepped forward and raised his hand slightly. “That would be me, sir.”

The officer looked him over and nodded. “Can I see your license, please, eh?” Nick nodded and pulled his driver’s license out, handing it to the officer. He stood there nervously as the officer looked his license over closely. “American, eh?” Nick nodded again, and the officer laughed. “Well, Mr. Carter, seeing as you just crossed over the border here, I’ll let you off with a couple of tickets.”

“Yes, officer, and – wait, a couple of tickets?” Nick asked, as the officer handed him his license and he put it away. He silently prayed that he’d misheard the officer, and his accent made whatever he actually said sound like “a couple of tickets.”

“Yep,” the officer confirmed as he took out a large pad of paper and began to write on it. “One for reckless driving…” He pulled out the white paper and handed it to Nick. “… and one for speeding.” He finished his sentence as he pulled out the second piece of white paper he’d just written on. “Now, I better not catch you makin’ trouble around here again.”

“Oh, we’ll be careful, officer,” Brian spoke up.

“Good.” The officer smiled. “Have a wonderful day now, and welcome to Canada!”

“Yeah, wonderful day,” Nick muttered. First, he got stuck with a new shadow – who thankfully wasn’t there to see this disaster – and then he got a call from Diamond, who only wanted to talk about Leo Di-Jerkface, then he crashed his car because the Canadians didn’t drive on the right side of the road, and, to top it all off, now he had two tickets to pay off that HimTak would certainly not cover.

Looking down at the tickets, his eyes immediately were drawn to the dollar amounts at the bottom of the forms. “Hey, wait! Is this in American dollars or Canadian… um… money?” He sighed as the police car drove off, the officer obviously not hearing his question well enough to answer it as he waved goodbye, while merging back onto the highway.

Red tried her hardest not to laugh, but ended up laughing anyway. She looked at Nick apologetically as she tried to regain her composure, her laughter slowly dying down to a quiet giggle.

Brian rolled his eyes and plopped down in the backseat of the car, leaving the door open as he sat facing Nick, who was pacing back and forth to keep himself calm. “I knew I should’ve driven this time…” he muttered to himself.

“Ha!” Nick replied, having heard Brian’s comment when pacing past him. “But you can’t drive this car because it only answers to me!”

“Yeah, but even the car itself did a better job of driving than you did. And it crashed into a tree.”

Red stifled her laughter this time, and Nick picked up a large stick laying nearby and chucked it into the forest in front of him, before turning to look at the damage to the car, wondering how they were going to get to the hospital now.


  


On the 200 block of Elizabeth Street, in the heart of Toronto, heads turned as a massive vehicle came rolling up the street, its bass blaring, drumbeats thundering through its closed windows.

In the backseat, Brian massaged his temples, as if he had a headache. He leaned forward, sticking his head between the two front seats, and asked, “Tell me why again you felt the need to rent a Hummer?”

“I already told you,” said Nick from behind the wheel, not bothering to turn around. “That’s all the rental place had.”

“Liar.”

“I’m serious!”

“Red?”

In the passenger seat, Red Jewel turned down the stereo, which was blaring Disturbed, glanced at Nick, and turned around to meet Brian face to face. “He’s lying,” she confirmed, smiling in a satisfied way.

“Am not!” Nick protested.

“Are too,” Red replied coolly. “You have a terrible poker face. You always smile… or blush.” She reached out and pinched his cheek, which had, indeed, been turning pink.

Nick twisted away from her, scrunching up his face. “Alright, alright, you got me. I just thought a Hummer would look cool. ‘Specially if we get to drive it wearing those spacesuit things.”

“Hazmat suits,” Red corrected for a second time.

“Yeah, those. C’mon Littrell, don’t you think?”

“You know what I think?” Brian chimed in. “I think my green-lovin’ cousin is gonna flip when he finds out you wrecked your car, the custom car he allowed you to have, and then used company money to rent the king of all gas-guzzlers as a replacement. Can you imagine the reaction, Red? I think I’m gonna have to be there.”

Red giggled. “K is gonna be pissed,” she admitted, with a sidelong glance at Nick.

“Which is why we stick with the story: this is all the rental place had,” insisted Nick stubbornly.

“And not only a Hummer, but a bright yellow one?” Brian ranted on. “I mean, really, Carter? I thought you HimTak guys liked to stay inconspicuous. There’s nothing inconspicuous about buzzing through downtown Toronto in a giant bumblebee!”

“Like I said… that’s all the rental place had. And if that’s not good enough…” Nick paused to turn down the stereo further. “Down With the Sickness” descended to a faint hum. “… then you know what we say?”

Brian rolled his eyes. “What do we say?”

“We say… ‘BLAME CANADA!’”

Red giggled. Brian groaned.

Nick grinned, and promptly launched into… “Blame Canada! Blame Canada! With all their beady little eyes and flapping heads so full of lies…”

“Nick.”

“Blame Canada! Blame Canada!”

“Nick?”

“We need to form a full assault; it’s Canada’s fault!”

“NICK!”

“What?!” Nick shouted, slamming his hands on the steering wheel. The horn honked. “Can’t you at least let me finish the fucking chorus?”

“Not when you’re about to drive right past the hospital!” Red exclaimed. “We’re here!”

“What? Oh – shitballs!” Looking up to see the blue letters spelling out TORONTO GENERAL HOSPITAL on the façade of a tall, tan building, Nick slammed on the brakes. He jerked the wheel to the right at the same time, causing the Hummer to bounce up onto the curb. “Oops.” He reversed and managed to back the front wheel off the curb, parallel parking neatly next to it. “Who’s da man?”

Neither Red, nor Brian responded. They both seemed eager to get out and away from the bright yellow Hummer. Not Nick, though. He turned up the stereo for one more chorus of “Down With the Sickness,” drumming his fingers on the steering wheel and head-banging a little, before he finally opened his door and jumped down.

When he looked up, Red and Brian were staring at him, and with them was another woman, also staring. She looked more bewildered than amused, like Red, or exasperated, like Brian. Nick strode up to the three of them, grinning. “Just needed one last dose of this mission’s theme music,” he explained.

Red stepped forward, touching the other woman’s arm. “Nick, this is my good friend from med school, Dr. Jeanie Boulet. Jeanie, meet my, uh… colleague… Agent Nick Carter.”

Nick gave Jeanie an appreciative smile, drinking in her beauty. She had skin the color of caramel and eyes like drops of coffee deep enough, he could drown in them. Her return smile was warm and kind, though he could detect the stress behind it and in the lines around her dark eyes.

“So, Dr. Boulet, you’re one of those infectious disease specialists, right?” Nick inquired. “Maybe you can answer this question for me: When do we get to put on the cool spacesuit things?”

Red groaned. “For the last time, Nick, they’re called Hazmat suits.”

Brian gave her a look, as if to say, Don’t bother getting annoyed; he’s clearly suffered some kind of traumatic brain injury. Red smirked back, as if to say, I know.

Oblivious to this exchange, Nick nodded eagerly. “Yeah, those! When do we get to put on those?”


  