Chapter 71
I always thought I’d have a big family. I come from a big, loud Cuban family, myself, and when I married Luis, we both assumed we would have the same. But my first pregnancy was hard; there were complications, and after Gabrielle was born, I lost the ability to have any more children. At the time, I was just grateful to have my baby, safe and sound, but there came a time, when Gabby was two or three years old, when I desperately wished I could give her a little brother or sister. Luis loved Gabby with all his heart, but I knew he would also have loved a son, a boy to carry on the Lopez name. Instead, we had just our precious daughter, who was destined to be an only child. We were a small family of three, but we were tight-knit and happy, until the night that tore our family apart.
The others here lost their families to the Osiris Virus, but I actually feel I’ve gained one. Kevin, Howie, Brian, and AJ are like brothers to me; Gretchen, my younger sister. Nick could be the son I never had, and Riley is like another daughter, an older sister for Gabby. I felt the same way about Kayleigh, God rest her soul.
That’s the only downside to bonding like a family; while it feels so good to love and be loved, it hurts so much to lose a loved one. Kayleigh may have rubbed some the wrong way at first, but we all loved her, and now, we all miss her. We all wish we could have saved her. I know Brian blames himself for not getting to her in time, though from the sound of it, there was nothing he could have done without getting himself killed, too. Howie’s been a wreck; he was closest to Kayleigh, and it was his turn at guard duty she was taking. If it hadn’t been his birthday, he would have been out there instead when the zombies attacked. He wouldn’t have stood a chance. And Kevin… as our leader, he’s shouldered a lot of the responsibility, too, for letting Kayleigh go. It’s not rational, but I can understand the feeling. It’s natural to want to protect your family – and to feel as if you’ve failed when you can’t.
These people are all my brothers and sisters, my sons and daughters, and my greatest fear is losing another one of them. But in the undead world, where fear is an everyday feeling, loss is inevitable.
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Week Twenty-Two
The mood around base had been dismal in the month since Kayleigh had died. Life seemed more like it had been when they’d first arrived at MacDill, than how it had been on Howie’s birthday – Kayleigh’s death day. It was as if they had regressed.
They didn’t move back into the chapel or any such nonsense, but they did spend less time on fun and more time on defense once again. Their safety on the base had been compromised, and the only answer was to try and secure it again, the best they could. Kevin’s solution was to build a fence that ran the length of the beach – essentially, a sea wall, though its purpose was to keep the zombies at bay, rather than the waves. They had started on it the day after Kayleigh’s funeral and worked tirelessly on it every day since. They used tools and lumber from the wood shop located at the arts and crafts center on base, and when that wood ran out, they started chopping it from the forest that covered the southwest corner of the peninsula.
Everyone helped. The strongest men – Kevin, Nick, and AJ – oversaw the logging work, while Brian, Howie, Riley, and Gretchen assembled the fence. Even Gabby proved useful by holding boards while they hammered and bringing more nails, while Jo spent her days in the swampy, mosquito-infested woods, helping drag logs into the bed of the truck and making sure no one got crushed underneath a falling tree.
The work was hard and hot, but it gave them purpose, kept them occupied, and took their minds off of Kayleigh. A month after her death, they still weren’t done, but they paused to acknowledge the anniversary. They went to the chapel, their usual meeting place, and lit candles for Kayleigh. Brian, who had officiated the funeral service, led them in a prayer. Jo had felt closer to him ever since he had opened his heart to God again. Their differences were forgotten. In fact, everyone had been getting along better, as they worked together to fortify the base and each other’s spirits.
It came as a surprise to Jo when, on that one-month anniversary, Kevin said, “We can’t stay here.”
Everyone looked at him, equally shocked. “Why not?” Howie demanded. “We have everything we need here. Once the wall is finished, we’ll be perfectly safe again – safer than anywhere else, at least.”
Kevin gave a nod. “Yes… but for how long? Eventually, we’ll run out of food. We’ll run out of fuel for the generators. We’ll run out of supplies. That’s if the zombies don’t pick us off one by one. What happened to Kayleigh – and to you, Howie, and to AJ before that – could happen again, to any of us. We think we’re protected, but we’re not. Not really. They’ll find another way in, another hole in our defense, another flaw we’ve overlooked. We’ll never truly be safe.”
“Gee, thanks for that optimistic outlook,” said Riley sarcastically, rolling her eyes. Beside her, Nick chuckled.
Kevin shrugged, unapologetic. “It’s the truth. We’ve done a good job at surviving so far, but we can’t sustain ourselves here forever. Our best chance for long-term survival is to increase our numbers. We need to find more survivors.”
“Why?” AJ spoke up right away. “We’ve got a good thing going here, a good group of people. We don’t need anyone else fucking that up. And anyway, if we have more mouths to feed, we’re just gonna run out of food and everything else that much sooner. Besides, we’ve already looked for other survivors, remember? We didn’t find jack shit. Everyone’s a fucking zombie.”
“We looked here,” Kevin replied, leveling his gaze with AJ’s. “I’m talking about a broader search. I think we need to get out of Florida and see what else is out there. We have no idea what the situation in the rest of the country is like.”
“The entire East Coast was affected,” Gretchen said. “New York, D.C.… it just spread down the coast.”
Kevin’s answer was simple. “Then we go west.”
“Easier said than done, cous,” said Brian. “It took Gretch and I a whole week just to drive down from Georgia. The major roads are blocked with traffic, and without power, the gas pumps are down, so refueling will be an issue. Not to mention the hordes of zombies roaming around.”
“I agree, driving is impractical,” replied Kevin. “We’ll fly instead.”
“Uhh, what?” Nick laughed nervously.
“I’m a pilot, remember. We’re on an Air Force Base. There’s plenty of planes here – and plenty of fuel. We can cover a lot more distance, a lot more quickly, and we won’t have to worry about zombie attacks in the air.”
Nick snickered. “Unless it turns into Zombies on a Plane.”
AJ immediately chimed in with his best Samuel L. Jackson impression: “That’s it! I have had it with these muthafuckin’ zombies on this muthafuckin’ plane!”
The two of them cracked each other up, and Gabby joined in. Jo’s disapproving frown quickly quieted her.
“We can go all the way to the West Coast,” Kevin continued, ignoring the jokes.
“And what if it’s the same situation out there?” AJ asked, serious once more.
Jo saw Kevin’s jaw tighten, his lips pressing into a thin line. “Then we’ll have to come up with a new plan. But we have to check it out. We need to know what we’re dealing with, how widespread this plague is.”
Jo wasn’t sure she wanted to know, but she could appreciate Kevin’s logic. It would be good to find more survivors, if there were other groups like theirs out there. It was just a big “If.”
“So who goes?” Howie asked, looking around. “Do we all go?”
“I think some of us should stay behind,” Jo spoke up quickly, “to protect the base and finish the wall.” She didn’t like the idea of taking Gabby into the unknown, back out into a world overrun with the undead.
Kevin met her gaze and nodded. “I agree. We don’t need everyone to go. Just a few of us – a small expedition. We’ll fly out, spend a few days scouting the area, then come back to report our findings.”
It sounded practical and reasonably safe. They just had to decide who would stay and who could go.
“Jo, Gabby, Howie, and Gretchen will stay behind,” Kevin decided immediately. He didn’t say it in so many words, but Jo knew and accepted that he was naming the weakest among them. She and Gretchen didn’t know how to fight zombies nearly as well as the rest of them, and Howie was a liability. And, of course, there was no way she would allow Gabby to go. “AJ, I think you should stay too, to help guard the base.”
“And what if I’d rather go?” asked AJ defiantly. Jo had never seen him disagree with Kevin, despite how different they were.
Kevin’s reply was calm, but firm. “I need you here.”
Perhaps it was the subtle flattery, the idea of being needed, that worked. In any case, AJ stopped arguing and agreed with a sullen nod. “Fine.”
“Does that mean the rest of us are going?” Nick asked.
Kevin’s sharp, green eyes turned on him. “Do you not want to?”
Nick didn’t look particularly enthusiastic, but he shrugged and replied, “I’ll go if you need me to.”
AJ snorted. “Don’t sound so excited, dude. Kev, I’ll trade with Carter if he’s gonna puss out.”
Nick’s face reddened. “I’m not pussing out! I just have kind of a… fear of flying…” he admitted, mumbling the last few words.
This time, AJ snickered outright. “I think you’ll have more to be afraid of than the fuckin’ plane on this trip, kid.”
“I know,” Nick said, smiling sheepishly.
“So are you in or out?” Kevin demanded.
Nick’s adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed hard. Jo could practically see him steeling himself. “I’ll go.”
“Good.”
“If Nick goes, so do I,” Riley jumped in immediately after. When Kevin eyed her uncertainly, she added scornfully, “I think I’ve proven that women can fight zombies, too, you know. This isn’t the nineteenth century. You did work with female soldiers in the military, didn’t you?”
Jo expected Kevin to look affronted that she was basically accusing him of being a chauvinist, but all he said was, “Of course, but they were well-trained.”
“If you’re looking for well-trained soldiers to go on this mission, it looks like you’ll be going alone,” she retorted coldly. “I may not have the brawn, but I’m just as good a shot as Nick – and I’m not afraid of flying. No offense,” she added, patting Nick’s arm.
“Fine,” Kevin said with a nod. “You’re in. Brian, what about you? Stay or go?”
“Do I have a choice?” Brian asked mildly.
Kevin looked annoyed. “Of course you have a choice. No one’s being forced into anything.”
Under his breath, Jo heard AJ mumble, “Yeah right…” If Kevin caught it, he didn’t react.
“Then I’d rather stay and help with the wall,” replied Brian. Jo didn’t miss the way he looked at Gretchen when he said it.
“Alright. So Nick, Riley, and I will go. The rest of y’all will stay behind to guard the base and keep working on the wall.”
It was decided. Jo asked the only question that remained: “When will you go?”
Kevin’s answer came promptly. “As soon as possible.”
***
Monday, September 24, 2012
Week Twenty-Three
While Jo, Gabby, Brian, Gretchen, Howie, and AJ spent Sunday working on the wall, Kevin, Nick, and Riley spent it preparing for their trip. Nick and Riley gathered supplies, while Kevin fueled up a small plane, made the necessary calculations of how far it could travel on a tank of fuel, and plotted their course.
They wasted no time. By the next day, they were ready to leave. It felt too soon to Jo, who was not ready to see her new family split up, but she went with the others to the air field to see them off.
Kevin had already pulled the plane out of one of the five, large hangars; it sat ready on the runway. They all helped him load the cargo hold with the rations and supplies they were bringing along, and then they milled around on the tarmac, knowing it was time for the trio to go, knowing they would soon have to say goodbye, but not knowing how to. No one seemed to want to be the first to start the farewells.
Finally, Kevin said, “Well… I guess we should get going. I wanna leave us plenty of daylight to get there. We’ll need to stop at Buckley to refuel in order to make it all the way to California.” That was the plan, to head straight to the opposite coast and try their luck there. It was too long a journey for the small plane to make on one tank of fuel, though, so Kevin intended for them to stop at another Air Force base in Colorado.
Brian stepped forward and shook his cousin’s hand, pulling him into a tight hug. “Be safe, cous,” he said, patting Kevin on the back.
When Brian released him, Kevin offered a tight smile. “You know I will. You were always the reckless one when we were kids, not me.”
Brian chuckled, nodding. “Yeah, who’d have guessed I’d grow up to be a preacher, and you’d be the pilot?”
“Who’d have guessed the world would be overrun with zombies?” was Kevin’s reply. Jo had come to understand his dry sense of humor well enough to know that it was meant to be a joke, but no one laughed.
When Brian went to hug Nick next, Jo approached Kevin. Before she could say a thing, he smiled at her and said, “You hold down the fort while I’m gone, Jo. I know AJ’ll think he’s running the show, but everyone will look to you as the true leader.”
“I hope not,” joked Jo, laughing lightly, but she knew there was some truth to it. Just as Kevin was the natural father figure in their group, she was easily the mother. Without him around, she would have to be the glue that held the group together. “You’d better come back soon, safe and sound. It won’t feel right here without you.”
Kevin nodded. “Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing. We’ll be back.”
“I know,” she said.
But as she watched her daughter run to him next and throw her arms around him, as she saw Kevin ruffle Gabby’s hair, as she heard him remind her to listen to her mother, Jo was struck by an awful feeling of dread. She had the sense that something was going to go wrong.
She said nothing, but as she watched the three of them climb into the plane, Kevin waving before he closed the cabin door behind him, Jo somehow knew it would be the last time she ever saw him.
