Chapter 1 – Midnight Cry

“Only you would think to hit a new club on one of the coldest and rainiest nights in Florida, D! Then, to top it all off, you park in East-Bumble-Fuck! We’re going to catch pneumonia and die. Just like our mothers always told us when we were little. Wet hair equals pneumonia, which equals death! Then what will our fans do? Damnit, D, it’s cold!” AJ McLean growled angrily, unrolling the collar of his leather jacket to shield his sensitive neck from the icy mist. His dark eyes were heavy with disgust as he peered out into the dark and chilly night. He was known to have a dramatic flair stitched into his personality, so his best friend and band-mate, Howie Dorough, was immune to his badgering.

“First off, J, it’s not pouring. It’s just a light sprinkle and you won’t melt. Second, the car is just a few blocks away, not miles. I’m sure you’ll survive,” Howie Dorough contradicted, smiling at his younger friend. His dark chocolate eyes twinkled with adventure. He wasn’t aggravated or irritated with AJ’s incessant whining because his nature gave him the unique nature of optimism. He always had a sunny personality to match Florida’s usually beautiful weather, which counteracted whatever depressive antics AJ might spout. “Why don’t you live it up? You never know what could happen on the way!”

“We’re not walking in a deadly rainforest with killer animals, D. This is freaking Florida! The only adventure we could possibly find is a drunk surfer with athlete’s foot!” AJ groaned, hurrying to catch up with Howie’s quick stride. Yet, Howie seemed uninterested in the debate AJ was delivering. Frowning, AJ peered at Howie with confusion. Since ending a long relationship with a woman the band thought Howie would marry, Howie had directed his life in a new direction. His sweet, caring, nurturing, energetic disposition in life thankfully hadn’t changed, but something deep inside his warm heart did. It was as if he were searching for the missing link in his life, yet hesitated on bringing up side a dire conversation.

“Weren’t you the one who told me to take risks?” Howie asked, breaking the silence.

“Yes, and I could have handled a tattoo, a piercing, bungee jumping, sky diving, rock climbing, swimming with sharks, or air gliding. Not freaking walking in the freezing cold! I didn’t care if you endangered your life, but I sure as Hell don’t want you taking me down with you!”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you’re dramatic?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you’re a smart-ass?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you’re close to getting your ass kicked?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you need a new chick?”

Howie jerked in surprise as the banter actually turned quite serious. He caught AJ’s arm with a cat-like reflex. They stood silently in front of a dark alley as small sprinkles of cool droplets layered their skin. Howie cocked his head to the side, obviously surprised with AJ’s blatant remark. The murky change in AJ’s eyes made it transparently clear that the members of their band were discussing their worries about Howie’s misfortune. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing—”

“Wrong, it’s definitely more than nothing. It’s obvious you guys have been discussing my life since whatever. So, c’mon, J, level with me.”

“Honestly?” AJ sighed, tucking his numbing hands into the back pockets of his damp jeans.

“It’d be nice.”

“D, you’ve changed since Roxie dumped you. The guys and I have played stupid for a while, but I can’t anymore. You spin off into dazes, you talk to yourself, you can hardly sleep at night, and those bizarre outbursts aren’t you at all. What’s up with you? Level with me, D,” AJ stressed.

“Roxie didn’t dump me like you all think she did,” Howie countered softly, running his hands against his damp, short, dark curls. He didn’t understand why the boys were so focused on the past relationship. Yes, he had cared deeply for the woman, but it wasn’t meant to be. “I ended it with her when I found out she didn’t want children. She didn’t even want to get married. She just wanted to live in the moment and never be tied down. We couldn’t compromise no matter what we did. She didn’t want kids, I did. She didn’t want marriage, I did. So, I ended it before it got worse. It was for the best.”

“But?”

“But since she left I feel like something’s missing from my life. Or maybe something’s been missing since the beginning but I had Roxie to cover up the hole… I really don’t know, but I do accept what happened with Roxie and I consider her a good friend. And I know that in the long run, she made me realize that something is absent in my heart. It’s so hard to explain, because I don’t even know what I’m looking for, but I know I have to look for something. Like I have to keep looking because God is waiting to give me something special.”

“Like what?”

Howie was about to answer, but a shrill screech echoed from behind them. They were startled at the helplessness of the painful shriek. The howl of agony barely offered a note of humanity, but reeked of heartache. AJ’s heart hammered with fear as he leapt into Howie’s arms for protection. Howie snorted in disbelief and pushed AJ out of his arms. Surprisingly, Howie did not fear whatever miserable creature lurked behind the pitiful sounds. If anything, something was drawing him toward the creature. The sound of need called to his numbed soul with a throbbing intensity. Ever so slowly, Howie began to creep toward the needy wails.

AJ shivered with disgust as he took several steps back from the situation, “What the Hell are you doing?!”

“Something is obviously wrong back there,” Howie replied, unthreading AJ’s fingers from his arm. Howie felt as if he were trying to calm an irrational girlfriend. He was about to speak to AJ again, but the sharp wails grew louder. Howie cringed as the sound bounced against the dark, damp, menacing alley. He felt sick to his stomach, knowing someone or something needed help within the lurking depths.

“This is the point in the movie where the hot-ass chick turns stupid, chases the sound, and gets chopped into tiny pieces with her blood flying everywhere!” AJ whined.

“I’m not a chick, asshole.”

“Well you’re not too damn smart either!”

“Shut up, J,” Howie scorned, traveling deeper into the alley. He clenched his fists at his sides, prepared for an attack. He slowly crept toward the sound of the screeches, but they suddenly ceased. He turned in a complete circle, baffled by the case. Howie stood for a moment waiting for the sound to return. Yet, no sound reverberated from the musty alley. Somewhat disappointed, Howie kicked the lid to a dingy trashcan. Immediately a scrawny cat leapt from its hiding place, hissing wildly. Howie screeched in surprise, tumbled backward, and stirred the wails yet again.

“Are you dead?” AJ called worriedly after a few moments.

“Is that a request?” Howie growled, noticing the wails emitting from the large dumpster. Unable to wait any longer, he peeled back the odorous top, coughing against a gag reflex as he noticed something quiver beneath the piles of filth. Howie sucked in a deep breath away from the garbage, then rummaged deep in the pile that had moved. He made a face when he uncovered a red-tinted Wal-Mart bag. Carefully, Howie pulled away the top of the plastic bag to reveal a bloody mass covered with clumping human tissues. Howie gasped and leaned against the dumpster to study the blue tinted, bloody mass, praying to God it wasn’t alive. He felt his heart wrench as a tiny hand freed from the tightly wound garbage bag and thrust upward into the cold night. The blue hand seemed to reach for Howie as the shrill wails erupted again.

Howie followed the adrenaline flowing through his body as he leapt into the dumpster, freeing the abandoned baby. He fell to his knees in a muddy puddle with the endangered child. He shrugged off his jacket and tore the rest of the plastic bag away from the newborn. He swaddled the shivering body into his jacket, holding it tight to his chest to give it warmth. Tears of anguish rolled down his cheeks as he stared at the bloody child’s blue-tinged lips, noticing only a faint breath occur every few seconds. It couldn’t have been more than a few hours old and needed immediate attention.

“Holy Hell, J, go get the car!” Howie screamed down the alley, stumbling to his feet as he willed his heat into the needy child.

“What’s wrong?” AJ called back.

“It’s a baby! It’s a God-damn baby!”

Chapter 2 – Scared Senseless

Howie and AJ were in a hazy state of shock as they sat numbly upon the hard plastic chairs in the hospital’s bleak waiting room. Though they felt numb inside, their senses picked up on every added dimension of the dreaded waiting room, like the sound of the nurses’ squeaky white shoes, the steady tick of the large clock, the tapping of the receptionists fingers upon a keyboard, the faint sounds of sirens and squelches from the radios, and the always disturbing smell of harsh cleaning products. Like most good Samaritans, the boys awaited the return of the skilled pediatric team that rushed to the abandoned child’s care. They couldn’t leave without knowing the child’s condition.

So, in the midst of their waiting, AJ had somehow managed to phone the rest of their band for help. Though he hadn’t given all the details of the evening, their friends understood the bare minimum – AJ and Howie needed them. In a matter of seconds they were on their way. It gave AJ a sense of warm comfort, even if they wouldn’t arrive for another hour. He didn’t know what they could exactly do, but anything was better than sitting in silence beside Howie’s statuesque form.

Howie had fallen mute since giving all the details he possibly could on the child’s situation. The horror of finding a child in such a vulnerable state had attacked the inner core of his golden heart. He had held the child tight against him as they rushed to the hospital in a state of panic. Now as they waited, he could only picture the helpless child suffocated by sticky layers of plastic bags and the faint flutter of the child’s heart against his chest as it wheezed for a breath of life. Throughout the whole ordeal, only one thought continually repeated in his sorrowful mind. He just couldn’t fathom how a parent could simply dump the newborn without a second thought. Silent tears continually fell down his cheeks as he remembered the little blue hand reaching into the air for help.

“Which one of you is the father?” a physician announced into the silence, stepping toward the only men in the waiting room. It was obviously a slow night for the Emergency Department, but not for the men. The sound of the unfamiliar voice caused both to lurch from their seating, anxious to hear the news. They prayed the child was still alive and well.

“Neith—”

“Me,” Howie blurted, interrupting AJ without any discretion. The sudden projection of Howie’s clogged voice caused AJ to jump in surprise. He arched his dark eyebrows in question at the older man; unable to comprehend why Howie had just offered himself as the father. AJ could only conclude that Howie feared they would be denied information on the newborn without kinship. Once the information was dispersed, Howie would offer the truth.

“Sir, since you are the father, I am inclined to ask how this occurred,” the physician trailed at the announcement, sizing up Howie for a moment. None of the physicians had ever encountered such a bizarre birth. To have a newborn rushed into the hospital without the laboring mother was unusual to say the very least.

“Doctor, wait, we found the kid—” AJ tried to explain again, finally deciding Howie was suffering from some strange postpartum depression.

“On my doorstep,” Howie interceded yet again, causing AJ’s jaw to drop. Howie couldn’t explain it, but something inside him stirred as he pictured the small newborn within his mind. He wouldn’t let the child suffer alone. Howie’s throat constricted as he stitched a detailed blanket of lies for the sake of the child. “We found the child on my doorstep with a confusing note. Basically my ex-girlfriend had just given birth and refused to go to the hospital. She dropped the baby off with the note explaining it was my problem. I suppose she thought that giving birth was enough. I wanted to locate her to get her to the hospital, but she disconnected her phone. My friend went to her home and her apartment was completely empty. The baby was turning blue while I was trying to call her, so I immediately came here. I knew it needed help…”

AJ watched in disbelief as the physician finally nodded his head in sympathy. The tired physician obviously thought that the story was too absurd not to be real. No one would be that foolish to plot such a wild tale for the sake of keeping a child. So, he hurriedly scribbled on his chart while speaking, “I’m so sorry for the trouble, but it’s vital that I do ask this type of information, Mr—”

“Howard Dorough.”

“Ah, yes, Mr. Dorough! I’m Dr. Withern, your child’s attending physician.”

“How is my child?” Howie questioned, causing AJ to snort.

“She’s fine. A little shaky at first, but she’s stabilizing nonetheless. She came in with hypoxia and hypothermia, which means that the oxygen in her blood was low and her temperature was low, but we have her in a warming incubator and an oxygen tent. We judged to find that she’s a little over two months premature, but remarkably has no complications. She’s underweight at about four pounds so we’ll watch her closely, but she’ll grow into a healthy little lady.”

“Her?”

“Yes, you have a baby girl. A little daughter,” Dr. Withern replied, becoming somber for just a moment. “That is if you intend to keep her.”

“Keep her?” Howie repeated in confusion.

“Well, Mr. Dorough, we always like to see the natural parents keep a child, but, to be frank, you have a very rare situation. Seeing as how your ex-girlfriend obviously has given up custody of the child, you also would have the chance to do the same—”

“No!” Howie hissed dramatically, looking quite furious at the idea. He could only imagine all the documentaries about terrible adoption centers and the horrors that awaited children who slipped between the cracks of the leaky government. Howie would never abandon the baby to such wicked circumstances.

“Then you accept custody?”

“Of course,” Howie declared with a firm nod, listening to AJ mumble something beneath his breath.

“That’s fantastic,” Dr. Withern approved quickly, not paying attention to AJ’s dispute. Dr. Withern respected any man that would take on the responsibilities of his child’s care. He smiled and firmly shook Howie’s hand. “As I said before, we always love a happy ending in these circumstances. Your daughter is in the NICU, Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, but mostly for observation. If you like, I can show you to the NICU where you’ll have the opportunity to visit with your daughter. Then I’ll have the opportunity to retrieve the birth certificate so we can process everything.”

“Sounds wonderful,” Howie approved, following Dr. Withern toward the NICU windows. The physician poked inside to give the nurse some quick details and to receive some information on the Dorough infant. He stepped back out and instructed that Howie would be able to enter shortly. With another smile, Dr. Withern walked down another hallway to retrieve the birth certificate.

“ARE YOU INSANE?!” AJ finally screeched with anger, smacking Howie sharply when he was assured no one was paying attention. AJ couldn’t believe what he had just witnessed. Howie had actually taken custody of a child who wasn’t even his. The ramifications of this foolish act seemed unending in AJ’s flabbergasted mentality.

“Why?” Howie returned as calmly as possible, still staring at the infant he claimed as his own. AJ’s anger didn’t seem to register as he tilted his head to the side, mesmerized by the tiny bundle of life. It was amazing that a child could survive such terrifying circumstances.

“Hello, D! She’s not yours! Not to mention the fact that you might actually be committing a fucking crime by telling a doctor that she is!”

“She’s not anybody’s, AJ. She’s abandoned, remember?” Howie pointed out.

“That’s not your problem!”

“Yes, it is.”

“No, it’s not! You just found the damn kid! It doesn’t mean that you have to take responsibility—”

“AJ—”

“Howie! She’s not yours—”

“But she deserves to be,” Howie whispered quietly.

AJ turned somber over Howie’s last words, feeling a slight twinge in his heart. He took a moment to study Howie’s facial expressions. The older man looked saddened at the state of the child, but his chocolate brown eyes twinkled with a small amount of hope. AJ found himself digging deeper into Howie’s choice. AJ’s eyes grew wide with wonder as he quickly but softly scorned Howie’s decision again, “Are you… Is this about… Howie, do you honestly think this kid can mend that hole in your heart from Roxie? Are you using the baby to get over Roxie? Because we can just buy you a puppy—”

“Damnit, AJ, shut up!” Howie groaned, frustrated by his friend’s stupid allegations.

“What?”

“Look, I honestly don’t know why I said the baby was mine. It just felt like something jumped in my body and answered for me. I mean, you didn’t see her wrapped in those plastic bags. You didn’t see her covered with blood and struggling to breathe. You hear her pitiful wails screaming in your ear. She looked so wretched and she needed me so much in that instant. And she still needs me. Out of everyone passing the dumpster, I heard her. God let me hear her. And I just can’t see her suffering in the care of a government institution. I’ve heard too many horror stories about those places. I just… I feel like she needs me just as much as I need her. There’s something special about her and I won’t let her go.”

“You’re serious?” AJ asked, knowing Howie wouldn’t be dissuaded over his decision. Howie’s heart was truly golden. He held a strong passion for everything and it was the first time that Howie’s eyes truly lit since Roxie’s departure. The small newborn was creating some special magic spell upon Howie that AJ refused to break.

AJ watched quietly as Howie glanced through the glass. Howie’s dark eyes locked upon the small infant who had already captured his heart. Her small frame was concealed in the special warmer. Various tubes were hooked upon her for oxygen and monitoring, but Howie looked beyond that. He could only see the true beauty of the small gift. The peaches-and-cream colored newborn that barely weighed four pounds couldn’t be more precious in his eyes. She had a tuft of light blonde fuzz atop her perfectly rounded head. Her delicate fingers curled into tiny fists that rested near her pursed rose-tinged lips. Her small button nose crinkled as she sniffled, drawing her small legs upward before stretching. Surprisingly, she was calm compared to the other screaming infants. Howie smiled, tracing his fingers down the glass. “I’m positive. She needs me and I need her.”

“Mr. Dorough, your daughter’s birth certificate!” Dr. Withern called excitedly, breaking up the boys’ conversation.

“Oh, thank you,” Howie replied, taking the clipboard. He listened to Dr. Withern’s instructions about filling out the birth certificate. Then the physician offered his congratulations again and left the men yet again to check on his other patients.

“D, this baby, your daughter… This is so—”

“I know,” Howie murmured. He already understood what AJ was thinking, even if AJ couldn’t express it verbally. Howie grasped the birth certificate firmly in his hands as they both grew silent again. He stared into the NICU, his eyes locking upon the tiny infant for one more time. He couldn’t ignore the warmth radiating from his body as he watched the tiny girl. It just felt so right in his heart. “You have to understand that she needs us, J.”

“Yeah…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” AJ repeated, finally smiling toward the newborn. “Well, she is cute.”

“She is,” Howie agreed.

“Can I help name her?”

“She’s not a puppy—”

“Well, duh, but she still needs paper-trained.”

“Oh, Lord, AJ.”

“What?”

“Let’s just go see if we can visit her.”

Chapter 3 – Charming Little Lady

“Explain this to me again, AJ. He wants to do what with a baby who isn’t his?” Kevin repeated in obvious doubt, pacing around the private room the hospital had secured for Howie. The final three band members, Kevin, Brian, and Nick had arrived at the hospital with fear. AJ’s phone call hadn’t been the clearest conversation, so terrible thoughts surfaced while they hurried to their friend’s aid. Kevin, the oldest, he had arrived fearing the absolute worst. He assumed that Howie was lying upon his deathbed, but was knocked flat on his face with the shocking news of Howie’s quick adoption. He had never expected to hear such a fanatical idea from Howie, the levelheaded thinker of the group.

“I already told you,” AJ groaned, tugging on his thick raven locks. Howie had traveled to the NICU just before their friends had arrived. They hadn’t expected them there so soon, so Alex didn’t mind waiting around in the private room alone. But, when the others had arrived, AJ found himself in a state of panic. Kevin had attacked like a vicious bulldog as soon as he heard the news. And since Howie was nowhere in sight, AJ was left to deal with the brunt force of the rage. “Howie found the kid in the dumpster, Kev. No one was going to help her! No one heard her but Howie! So, she would have died without Howie. He just wants to help—”

“Just wants to help? What the Hell does that mean? Don’t you understand? It’s a big job, AJ. A kid is a huge responsibility!” Kevin finally burst, unable to bury the emotional fury over Howie’s stupidity. Nick and Brian cleared their throats in attempts to speak, but Kevin released a disgusting glare causing them to shrink back in their seats. Kevin refused to give any of the younger men leeway to speak in the issue, because he decided that they all felt the same. “For goodness sake! What about our fans? Did that ever run through your heads? Like what the Hell are we going to tell them? What’s he going to do with the kid on tour? How the hell are you going to make sure this child is healthy, secure, and loved?”

“Kev, give AJ a break!” Brian voiced, trying to cut the younger man a break. It wasn’t fair that AJ was being battered for Howie’s decision.

“For real—” Nick tried.

“No! I want to know what the Hell—”

“Kevin, please stop, we’re going to do just fine. I’m sorry to say that you can’t stop me from doing this. I’m not leaving her behind. I promise you that I can make it work,” Howie called softly, interrupting the heated discussion before it could escalate into a physical war. He seemed completely relaxed as he walked into the room with a small pink bundle. He had heard all the objections while he waited in the hall with his new daughter. He understood Kevin’s anger at his wild decision, but he wouldn’t be swayed. She needed him.

“Howie—”

“Kevin, just do me a favor. Just hold her for two minutes and tell me she doesn’t deserve us,” Howie commanded softly, handing Kevin a precious bundle. He wanted them to realize the importance. Though, he knew that the odds were with him as Kevin brought the child close to his chest. The infant had a unique spirit that captured her unsuspecting caretakers like a sweet bewitchment. Every nurse had fallen in love with the tiny bundle, unable to pass her incubator without kissing her tiny nose. So, Howie assumed it would be the same way with his friends. Allowing the infant to work her magic, he simply folded his hands across his chest and leaned against the wall to study his friends’ reactions.

“She’s… She’s so tiny, D…” Kevin finally murmured in shock as he held the child away for a better view. Like Howie had hoped, Kevin was completely mesmerized by the child’s watchful jade eyes. Kevin naturally cooed softly as he watched the small infant stifle a tiny yawn, bringing her fists to her face for comfort. Kevin found it hard to resist the smile toying with his lips as he ran his free hand against the little blonde curls pinned beneath a pink bow. “Howie, she’s darling, but we’re forgetting the facts. She’s not yours—”

“Kev, no one wanted her.”

“And what if someone comes looking for her?” Kevin pressed, offering the newborn to Brian. Kevin understood Howie’s noble intentions, but the implications behind them could be hazardous to the entire group. Being in the limelight of America could be cruel and merciless if the right rumor spread. Howie was putting the entire group’s career on the line – a line that not many dared to cross.

“She was in a dumpster, Kev—”

“I know—”

“No, you don’t,” Howie argued with obvious contempt. He stepped toward the older man, his eyes dark with concern. No one would ever be able to understand what he saw that night. “She was covered in mountains of garbage and filth. It was a miracle that I even found her within that disgusting trash, because she seemed to blend in because she was wrapped tightly in Wal-Mart bags. The bags were tainted with her blood as she screamed for help. Don’t you understand? Whoever gave her life was trying to kill her in the same instant! One of those bags was wrapped around her head… I had to tear through it just so she could breathe…”

Kevin fell silent over the revelations that Howie had offered in confidence. He couldn’t bring any words to his mouth as he turned to watch the three youngest men with the willful infant. She was now cradled in Nick’s arms with Brian and AJ holding her tiny hands. They each exchanged amused smiles as the two holding her hands blew raspberries upon her palms. The tiny infant’s eyes peeked open in surprise at the surround sound, actually offering the starts of a faint smile, causing the boys to laugh in return.

Kevin was shocked at the sight because AJ was actually smiling, which was a rare find since he was still recovering from his suicidal breakdown just months before. It had been so long since they had completely connected as a true family. Since releasing their last album, they had started to part ways. But, here they sat, united by such a tiny bundle of love. It was as if they had a clean slate to fix the broken foundation of their musical family.

“Howie, I can’t—”

“What do you guys think of her?” Howie called, interrupting Kevin’s final thoughts. Howie decided it would be best for the entire group to offer their say before Kevin made his decision, because Kevin’s verdict could completely shatter their entire existence as a band. Howie refused to be swayed on his choice to keep the infant, so he would have to part ways if Kevin declined her in their lives.

“Kev, she’s adorable. She’s the prettiest baby I’ve ever seen. And her eyes are so soft and seem to drink everything in. She’s so curious about life… And I don’t think I’ve seen anything so tiny before,” Brian called in a hushed tone, not wanting to rouse the newborn from her slumber.

“Can we keep her?” Nick pleaded quickly, making his choice known in an instant.

“She’s not a puppy!” Kevin groaned, tugging hard on his raven locks, realizing that he was the only one standing against this union of father and daughter.

“Kev,” Howie tried to protest softly. “She’s—”

“What’s her name?” Kevin interrupted with a rough bark.

“Huh?” Howie deadpanned in surprise.

“What’s the name of the first Backstreet Daughter?” Kevin rephrased with a soft smile.

Howie stood silent for a moment, drinking in Kevin’s thoughtful words. Finally realizing that Kevin accepted the first daughter of the tight-knit family, Howie beamed a proud smile and offered the official birth certificate for viewing.

“Jillian Luz Dorough.”

Chapter 4 – Maternal Needs

“Wait! The road to your house is at least another mile away… No! Not that turn… Why are we here?” AJ stammered with apprehension, noticing Howie weave into the parking lot of an exclusive baby store. Jillian had just been released from the hospital an hour ago, so AJ assumed they would head home with the little bundle of joy. But he was sadly mistaken as Howie eased into the first open parking spot he could locate. Not liking the odds of the situation, AJ craned his neck for a view of the backseat with a twinge of uneasiness. Thankfully, Jillian was still snoozing soundly in her car seat, but that could easily change with a few unnecessary movements or bulky sounds from entering a busy store. And AJ had absolutely no interest in being caught anywhere with a screaming child.

“Well, this would be a baby store and Jillian’s a baby. So, I’m guessing that I decided my baby Jillian needs stuff from this baby store before we can go home. I figured it would be the best time to stop, since this is the closest store to my house. Besides, Mom’s setting up my old crib and stuff now—”

“Good, then turn around!” AJ demanded, stomping on the floor as if he were pressing the gas pedal.

“J, we don’t have food, clothes, diapers, wipes—”

“You got cold pizza in the fridge… and we can use your old t-shirts for clothes, diapers, and wipes. Lord knows you have some t-shirts that need to be condemned!” AJ protested, lurching forward as Howie killed the engine to glare at him.

“You can’t feed a baby pizza and don’t make me start naming out some of those disasters you tried to pass off as the latest fashion from France!”

“But—”

“Get out of the car,” Howie ordered, unfastening his seatbelt. He quickly hopped into the back of his favorite Mazda 626 to unfasten Jillian’s car seat. A proud smile curved against his lips while he observed Jillian dozing peacefully, suckling tenderly on her fingers with a small contented sigh. He was halfway to the entrance before glancing up from his daughter to notice AJ still perched inside the car, muttering incoherently to himself. Howie swallowed a curse at AJ’s belligerent disobedience before he hissed loudly, “AJ! Now!”

“This isn’t good for my rep!” AJ groaned, slowly opening his car door.

“It couldn’t hurt it either! Let’s go!”

AJ finally slammed his car door, openly sulking as he stepped into Howie’s stride. Howie’s blatent attempts at ignoring his behavior caused a streak of childishness to flow through AJ’s veins. He immediately pouted to the point of over exaggerating the protrusion of his bottom lip as Howie freed a cart. Howie didn’t seem to notice as he pulled open the top seat to click Jillian’s car seat in. He double-checked the security of Jillian’s car seat before covering her small form with the soft chenille blanket. He then glanced back to locate AJ, finally observing AJ’s foul expression. Howie folded his arms across his chest, “Son, are you jealous?”

“Yes! Ah-I mean no!” AJ screeched.

“Good, take her in and get started,” Howie concluded, abruptly turning from the cart.

AJ became alarmed, lunging to grasp Howie’s arm. “Where the Hell do you think you’re going?”

“I forgot something in the car. Just take her in. I’ll be two seconds,” Howie sighed, pulling away.

“Oh no!” AJ whimpered pathetically, knowing he was truly alone with the ticking time-bomb.

*~*~*

“I feel like a blind person at a laser light show! I mean, honestly! What the Hell is iron-enriched milk? Protein enriched powdered milk. Powdered milk? Milk in a can? Vitamin D Plus milk? Breast milk simul—gross! Jillian, let me just tell you that those play toys are not meant to leak! … And why can’t we just buy you a damn cow?” AJ protested with agitation, slowly walking down the baby food and milk isle. He felt so lost and started to believe Howie had betrayed him. His older friend had yet to return from the car. AJ was beginning to wonder about the possibilities of a search and rescue. Sure, the baby was quiet, but she was a ticking time bomb in AJ’s mind. One false move and he’d be deaf for a lifetime.

“And what the Hell is up with all this food? Mushed peas? Smashed carrots? Burnt cookies? Strained squash? What are these mothers thinking? Why can’t we find some pizza in a can?” AJ groaned, stopping near the jars of various baby foods. He picked up two different jars, gazing down to Jillian with question. “Do you even eat this shit yet?”

AJ shrugged helplessly when he received no response from the slumbering newborn. Obviously she didn’t seem to care about her choice of foods, so he tossed a few jars into the cart without much thought. He never expected the loud clunk to immediately jar Jillian from her nap. AJ didn’t even know the difference till she offered a blood curdling screamed, causing him to drop another jar upon his foot. He cursed as he watched her become rigid from being startled with the natural reflex of newborns. He winced with agony, almost feeling the skin peel from his bones at the wretched whine sounding from the small infant’s lungs. The terrifying sound seemed to alert all the mothers in the aisles; their gazes firmly set upon AJ. He blushed with embarrassment, scrambled toward the car seat, and started to fumble with pathetic excuses to cease Jillian’s screams.

“Look, kid, I can’t pick you up! I’m not authorized to do it! I don’t have a permit or any insurance. And I don’t know if that you-break-it-you-bought-it policy applies to babies. So, just take a deep breath! Find your center and make peace with it. C’mon, chant with me,” AJ tried lamely, grabbing Jillian’s flailing hands to try out some yoga movements. She looked none too pleased as her cherubic face contorted to a look of pure horror. Her usually rosy cheeks were a furious red as she released another series of ear-numbing screams. Her hands balled into fists of fury as she thrust her legs toward AJ’s chest.

AJ recoiled in surprise at the soft thump on his chest with Jillian’s floundering feet. His head started to throb at the continuous pulsating screams projecting from such a small bundle. He stomped his foot like a stubborn child, never noticing a young woman approach from the opposite end of the aisle. Instead, he bent down to stare into Jillian’s’ teary emerald eyes with a growl in his voice. “No need to get violent on me, Kid! I shouldn’t even be running around with your diapered butt in my hands. I’m not trained at this stuff! Damnit, I’m an only child! I don’t know what the Hell I’m doing! I told him, but does he listen? Not your father! That’s one thing you’ll learn, Kid. I think he secretly likes torturing me. Just because I managed to smear honey inside his drawers after he got out of the shower. I mean… Why are you still screaming?! Don’t you have a damn off button?”

“Do you need help?” an unfamiliar voice called before AJ could continue his incessant rambling.

“No, I need a damn zoo keeper!”

“Those are reserved for when the children actually climbing to the ceiling and flinging their diapers at the crowd,” the woman chided softly, finally coming into AJ’s view. She stepped forward, easing AJ to the side after sitting her basket down. AJ tugged hard on his dark locks in attempts to swallow his own screams, obviously not objecting to this woman’s kind help. Instead, he watched the woman smile softly as she eased Jillian out of the car seat. She instantly started to coo softly, holding Jillian close within the crook of her arm. Jillian’s wails almost died the instant she was nestled in the woman’s embrace. AJ snorted with disgust when he noted that Jillian’s screams turned into mere sniffles and an occasional hiccup while she stared intently at the stranger.

The woman continued to fuss softly to ease Jillian’s fears. “You’re so precious. Just wanted to be held, huh, Sweetheart?”

“Watch out, she bites!” AJ grumbled, slowly uncovering his ears to hear Jillian coo with a soft gurgle of love. “How the Hell did you—”

“AJ! Is Jillian okay? Please tell me you didn’t drop her! Please, Dear God, tell me AJ didn’t bounce my baby like a basketball!” Howie blurted, rushing up the isle. His eyes were wild with alarm after hearing the shrill screams radiating at the entrance. His cheeks flushed a bright red as he located AJ with a soft curse. “What happened? I shouldn’t have left you—”

“She’s fine,” the woman assured with another kind smile, causing Howie to stumble in surprise. “Judging by the look on your face, you must be Daddy.”

“Yeah—” Howie drawled out his answer, completely mesmerized by the beauty holding his tiny daughter. She was his height with a figure to be admired. The softly rounded curves of her body enhanced the feminine characteristics upon the lithe grace of her sweetly toned form. Her straight golden locks clipped neatly below her shoulders hung gracefully, allowing Howie’s eyes to travel down to the slightly larger curve of her supple breasts. Howie swallowed hard and quickly assumed she had some form of dance training by judging her elegant stance. His eyes then immediately traveled to her gorgeous face as if making a mental sketch. Her full supple lips were lightly glossed with what Howie assumed to be a delicious tasting gloss and curved into a sweet smile. But the most fascinating feature was her rare violet eyes glowing with a true sincerity that most women lacked in the twenty-first century. Howie found himself speechless because he had never seen such beauty within one woman.

“Sorry if it looks like I’m butting in. But it looked like your friend needed some help with the baby. She just needed to be held a little bit. She’s really sweet,” the woman interjected, seemingly uncomfortable with Howie’s staring. She mustered yet another smile, settling Jillian back into her car seat. The baby shifted with a soft wheezing sigh from her cries, but stayed fast asleep. Satisfied, the woman pulled her blonde locks into a ponytail before picking up her basket t continue shopping. “Well… have a nice day.”

“Howie,” he blurted without thought, not wanting her to disappear.

She turned with surprise. “What?”

“My name…” he murmured, obviously fighting his brain to finish the sentence, “Is Howie.”

“Oh, my name is Keveney.”

“Keveney? That’s beautiful.”

“Well, thank you,” Keveney answered with a faint blush tickling her tan cheeks. She set her basket down again to properly offer her hand. “It’s really nice to meet you, Howie.”

“Likewise!” Howie agreed. “And I really didn’t mind you helping out my friend—”

“Who has a name!” AJ snorted with interruption.

Howie blushed furiously, mustering a small smile. The woman was already making his brain melt from the heat radiating between them. He had never been so instantly attracted to a woman before. “Sorry that I didn’t give you all the introductions. My friend’s name is AJ.”

“And the Darling in the car seat?”

“My daughter, Jillian.”

“First time father?”

“You could say that,” AJ snorted.

Howie offered a sharp glare to AJ before continuing, “Yeah, how’d you know?”

“I see them all the time,” Keveney answered simply, moving her hands to smooth the length of her form-fitting shirt. Her violet eyes finally pulled upward and she started to laugh faintly at their bewildered faces. “I’m a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner, so I see parents on a daily basis.”

“Higher than a nurse?” AJ questioned.

“I have my Master’s Degree if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Oh—”

“So, what are you doing here?” Howie interrupted, not wanting AJ to interfere. “Do you shop to stock up on supplies at the hospital for the new clients. Or do you have little ones of your own with a husband to shop for?”

“No, my youngest sister,” Keveney chuckled.

“You still live with your parents?” AJ remarked in surprise, wincing when Howie stomped on his foot.

“No, my mother asked me to stop by and pick up some things, because I visit for dinner every Tuesday and Thursday,” Keveney answered, surprisingly without any sour notes in her melodious voice. If anything, she was just enjoying the pleasant conversation. She glanced to the boys’ cart for a moment before eyeing tiny Jillian. Her mind seemed to be computing the supplies against the size of Jillian. “May I ask you how old she is?”

“Barely a week,” Howie replied, wrinkling his brow in confusion at Keveney’s laugh. “Why?”

“Newborns don’t usually take baby food,” she explained with an infectious smile. Howie glanced to his cart with embarrassment at the unneeded items. He dove toward the cart to retrieve them quickly, wondering why he even asked AJ to start on the shopping. “Didn’t your wife give you a list, Howie?”

“I don’t have a wife,” he blurted, pushing the items into AJ’s arms to be replaced. He connected with her light violet eyes and fumbled to smile at her bewildered look. “She left Jillian behind… My girlfriend, I mean, left her. Jillian was a preemie and my girlfriend couldn’t handle it.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay…” Howie answered, feeling guilty for deceiving this innocent woman.

“Um…” Keveney stumbled words against her tongue. The conversation had quickly died with Howie’s sad tale, making him regret even conjuring up such a foolish story. He watched in regret as Keveney picked up her basket before admiring the dozing Jillian once more. “The best formula for a preemie is enriched and fortified. They have…” Keveney plucked a can specifically dedicated to premature infants. “Their own kind.”

“Oh! Thank you so much,” Howie approved, placing several cans of formula into the cart. His heart skipped a quick beat, realizing the conversation was back on track. He mustered another embarrassed smile. “Guess I’m kind of lost with all this baby stuff.”

“That’s okay, most fathers couldn’t handle the pressure,” Keveney laughed, pulling her business card from her pocket. “But be sure to call me if you need anything, Howie.”

Chapter 5 – Trouble Maker

“Are you sure you can handle her by yourself, D? You had your Mom and sisters over for the first week. Maybe you should wait till the daytime to actually do it alone. I just don’t think we should risk anything, I can stay the night…” Kevin called from Howie’s living room, gazing down in awe as he gently rocked Jillian. She offered a soft coo toward her new uncle, reaching her tiny hand up for him to kiss. He had just rescued the small girl from Nick’s clutches, realizing Nick planned to shake the baby up to make her a “spew-rocket” for Howie when he returned with her bottle. Nick seemed annoyed by the change, but quickly tackled Brian to calculate another form of entertainment.

“Kev, you don’t have to stay the night. I’ve been around babies before. After all, I have nieces and nephews!” Howie replied with a slight holler from the kitchen, warming Jillian’s evening bottle. He gazed around his kitchen, realizing the destruction the boys had caused with the various pizza boxes. The boys had spent the entire day with Jillian and Howie, easing them into the newly formed family. Needless to say, Jillian had seized all their hearts with her natural wonder. She was the perfect angel, so no one could refuse her in Howie’s life. She already seemed like a natural part of the Dorough household and had dramatically lifted Howie’s spirits.

“For the entire night by yourself?” AJ asked with skepticism, collapsing onto the couch with the wrestling Nick and Brian. He gazed over at Kevin in the rocking chair with Jillian as his mind began to overflow with smart comments. Yet, he had no time to plan his next quick-witted comment, for his face always revealed his wickedness. Kevin caught wise and delivered a sharp glare, causing AJ to quickly swallow his cleverness.

“AJ’s been intercepted!” Nick snickered.

"Why don't you spell that," AJ fired with a growl.

"I-N...huh?"

"Exactly, dumbass---"

“Guys, let’s lay the cards on the table. You don’t trust me with Jillian, do you?” Howie asked flatly, emerging from the kitchen with Jillian’s bottle at hand. He seemed oblivious to the atmosphere, but too caught up to really care. “I’m not Nick—”

“Hey!” Nick growled, folding his arms defensively across his broad chest.

“I’m just saying!” Howie replied easily, shaking the warm bottle to ready it for Jillian’s consumption. He motioned for Kevin to stand, quickly taking Jillian into the crook of his arm. He cooed down at the curious bundle before settling into the rocking chair. Jillian gazed up with her large emerald eyes, chewing on her tiny fingers with a hungry eagerness. Her beautiful eyes widened further as Howie held up the bottle for her view. Her lips instantly formed an ‘o’ of delight. Howie chuckled as she latched onto the bottle, sucking heavily to plump her soft cheeks with the satisfying formula. “Jillian and I are just fine. She’s a sweetheart and wouldn’t give her Daddy any trouble.”

“She may be a sweetheart, but what will you think at two in the morning? Because, frankly, I recall you being a bear in the early hours when I came back from clubbing,” AJ laughed with amusement. It was so simple to tease Howie’s good nature. He had always been so easygoing, so AJ always made it a point to find Howie’s trigger buttons.

“Like you can really talk. I think you’ve lost your last three girlfriends because you couldn’t get out of bed before one in the afternoon without making a voodoo doll of your morning caller,” Howie answered, clicking his tongue at Jillian as she suckled with contentment.

“Ouch, keep the gloves above the belt, D,” Kevin chuckled as AJ scowled.

“Oh fu—”

“No swearing!” Howie quickly chided, running his fingers down the soft slope of Jillian’s forehead to appease her.

“Huh?” AJ deadpanned for a moment. Howie’s home had always been neutral territory, allowing the boys to speak freely. “Since when—”

“The baby, duh,” Nick interrupted, obviously proud that he knew the answer.

“Thanks, Captain Obvious,” Brian snorted.

“Yes, the baby,” Howie retorted before the youngest men could erupt into a heated argument. He watched Jillian nestle sweetly into the crook of his arm, placing her tiny hands on the bottle as if to help her father. She parted her lips from the nipple long enough to offer a tender yawn. Howie smiled softly, stroking the soft down of her golden locks. Her emerald eyes finally locked against Howie’s chocolate eyes as she started to suckle again. A special bond instantly formed between the two. One of father and daughter.

“We’ll be fine,” Howie declared, ending the discussion.

*~*~*

“We are clearly not fine!” Howie yelped in pure disbelief, pacing around the living room in a state of sheer dismay. Jillian was perched against his shoulder, screaming with frustration for the last hour. Howie didn’t understand what could be so wrong; usually he could calm her frazzled state in a matter of seconds. Besides, she had been sleeping so peacefully, but when Howie went to rest all Hell broke loose.

“Alright, Jillian! Daddy’s holding you… What more do you want?” Howie continued to speak with the child in hopes that his voice would soothe her, but she never settled. His heart ached at the sight of the suffering child. He had never heard such a pitiful sound emerge from the depths of her raw throat. Her wails ended with shrieking pitches, causing Howie to cringe. Her small angelic features grew taunt with fury. Her cheeks deepened to a dark red as tears soaked down Howie’s shirt mixed with the baby’s mucous. He felt awful.

“What’s the matter, Jillian? What’d I do wrong?” Howie blurted with despair, bouncing the child against his chest. He couldn’t imagine how mothers did this all day. His head was starting to ache from the sharpness of her cries, he was exhausted, and just felt so helpless. “Jillian! Sweetheart! You already ate, you’re burped, we gave you a sponge bath, and you’re not wet or soiled. So, what’s wrong? Please, just tell me!”
Jillian didn’t seem satisfied with Howie’s pleas, however. She released another sharp wail, causing Howie to wince yet again. Yet, she did something unexpected – she held her breath. Fear gripped Howie’s heart as her commotion ceased.

“Jillian?” Howie murmured, holding her out for inspection. Her face was turning purple from the lack of oxygen. “Jillian! Breathe!”

The child continued to hold her breath, offering Howie a new feeling of doom. His heart seemed to burst from his chest with fear. He pulled the child close to his chest, scrambling for the phone. He cursed openly as the phone clattered to the floor because he was unable to balance the baby and his panic. Her breath still paused as he eased her into the car seat, grabbing the phone and then reaching in his back pocket to find his wallet. He snapped the wallet open to pluck Keveney’s business card free. He hurriedly dialed the home number.

“Jillian! Breathe! Breathe for Daddy!” Howie pleaded as the phone rang within his ear. He had never seen an infant pull such an outrageous stunt. No one had warned him of this Hell. He choked as he rocked the car seat with his foot. It seemed like an eternity till Jillian released another wail, causing Howie to fall back onto with relief. “Thank God!”

“Hello?”

Howie jumped at the sweet voice chirping affectionately in his ear. He drew his body upward and pressed the phone tighter against his ear. He was instantly captured by the twinkled melody of such a simple word. That was until Jillian offered another sharp scream from her seat, reminding Howie of his problem. His mind quickly settled back to the alarming noise. “Is this Keveney Moore? The Pediatric Nurse Practitioner?”

“Yes—”

“Thank God! I mean, hello! You probably don’t remember me, but you met me at the baby store? How—”

“Howie and little Jillian,” Keveney interrupted with an amused laugh as Jillian shrieked yet again. “Is that sweet little Jillian in the background?”

“Yeah,” Howie grimaced. “That’s why I’m calling. She’s fed, burped, bathed, dried, just everything’s done! But she’s pitching a fit! You did so well with her at the store, can I entice you to help a single-father in desperate need?”

“Go to a complete stranger’s house in the middle of the night?”

“Uh…yes…” Howie trailed, finally realizing how ridiculous it sounded.

“What’s the address?” she laughed after a few moments of Howie’s uncomfortable silence.

Chapter 6 – New Acquaintances

“C’mon, Jillian, you’re honestly killing me,” Howie sighed with defeat, continuing to bounce the small infant feverishly in attempts to calm her. It seemed like a hopeless cause as the child’s shrill cries clogged with a mix of heavy sobs. Her beautiful green eyes were flooded with large tears of anger as her cheeks flushed with a furious red. Her hands were curled into tiny fists, gripping at her father’s already soaked t-shirt. She screamed yet again, her voice becoming harsh with the rawness of her throat. Howie gulped down his own panic, feeling so guilty at the child’s shabby appearance. The questions that seized his heart at the hospital started to flood back. The most horrifying question - Maybe he wasn’t made to be a father?

The twinkling chime of his doorbell quickly silenced Howie’s fearful thoughts. He immediately rushed forward with Jillian bouncing against his shoulder, feeling just a short surge of hope. He hurriedly fumbled with the doorknob as Jillian peeled a cry of protest. He cringed at the sharp cry, finally freeing the lock to swing open the door. “Ms. Moore!” he breathed in relief.

“Hello, Mr. Dorough,” she greeted brightly, stepping into the home with Howie’s insistent gaze. Her eyes traveled to the situation at hand, keeping her eyes trained carefully upon the small infant. Instead of cringing at the infant’s terrifying screams, Keveney smiled softly and held her arms out. And Howie obliged to hand over the child, praying that silence would soon envelope them. With skilled practice, Keveney swaddled Jillian tightly with the soft chenille baby blanket, and then rocked her softly within the crook of her arm. Keveney cooed softly at the child with a series of soft tones to her velvety voice. Surprisingly, Jillian’s tense features relaxed as her eyes slowly drooped with exhaustion.

“How’d you…” Howie was at a loss for words as silence quickly followed the tiny yawn from Jillian’s puckered lips. It was amazing to see such a calm stillness in the child that had exploded like a violent hurricane. It had only taken a few minutes for Keveney to set things correctly, which offered Howie a new perspective to the mysterious woman.

“Usually, newborns liked to be rocked instead of bounced like a basketball. And, they like to be wrapped tightly to give the feeling of a mother’s womb. All tight and cozy,” Keveney explained as the child finally slept soundly with her cheek nestled against the swell of Keveney’s breast.

“Or a beautiful mother,” Howie murmured without a conscious thought, admiring Keveney as if he had seen her for the first time. He almost forgotten how truly gorgeous she was. He took an opportunity to mentally save that very image of her, so he could never forget again. Her straight blonde locks were tossed into a high ponytail with stray locks tucked neatly behind her pierced ears. Her exotic light violet eyes glittered with an endearing fondness for the small infant. Her beautifully curved figure stood erect with perfect posture, alerting Howie to possible dance training. Her beauty wasn’t even hindered by the baggy sweatpants and light yellow tank top.

Yet, no matter how physically striking she was, something within her heart burned Howie’s insides with an undying fire. Maybe it was her gentle nature or mischievous smile. Howie truly didn’t know at that point, but already realized he was completely infatuated.

“What was that?” Keveney laughed, turning to gaze at him with confusion.

“Nothing…just, it’s amazing how she went right to sleep in your arms.”

“Comes with the territory,” Keveney shrugged as if it were nothing, “Where’s her room?”

“Oh, it’s upstairs, but—”

“Please, let me,” Keveney interrupted with a nurturing smile. Howie nodded with acceptance, quickly following her upstairs. Keveney seemed perfectly enchanted as she held Jillian close. She turned where Howie instructed, stepping softly into the nursery. She flipped on the softest light so as not to disturb Jillian’s sleep and stepped over to the cherry wood crib. Easing Jillian onto the soft mattress, she brought a hand over the child’s soft golden curls before pulling up the small comforter to nestle the infant. Jillian sighed softly, but never stirred. That gave Keveney the opportunity to view the nursery.

“It’s beautiful,” Keveney announced quietly, aware that Howie was lingering in the doorway. Yet, Keveney was still captured by the lovely room. Howie had strayed from the traditional use of pink for his baby daughter. Instead, he used a crisp pale yellow as the base color, accenting with variety of soft blues. The theme was musical with various soft instruments, musical notes, and nursery song lyrics. It was something Keveney had never seen before.

“Thanks, I had a lot of help,” Howie approved, concentrating on Keveney more than the room. He was still mesmerized by the passion stirring for the unknown woman. Never had he been so instantly drawn to a woman before, not even with Roxie. But, his haze seemed to clear when Keveney pushed passed him, obviously set upon another topic.

“She’ll probably wake up in two hours to be fed. But, you have to already know that. Newborns are the most demanding creatures on this planet. Just make sure to keep her bundled tightly; they like the closeness. You shouldn’t have another screaming fit if you just remember to do that and rock her gently. Other than that… you should—”

“You’re leaving?” Howie blurted, stumbling down the stairs to catch Keveney before she could open the front door. His heart thumped wildly against the length of his ribcage, offering a sharp pain. He started to imagine loosing her forever, which was odd, because he didn’t even have her.

“Um…yeah, crisis was averted, right?”

“Yes… but… Stay!”

“What?”

“For coffee! Yes! Stay for coffee! That’s the least I can do!”

“I don’t like coffee—”

“Cocoa?”

“Little too hot for–”

“Tea?”

“Again, too—”

“Soda?” Howie offered meekly.

“Pepsi?” Keveney finally requested, realizing the grand effort he was making.

“Of course, that’s the only soda actually allowed to take space in my fridge!”

*~*~*

“Ice or no ice?” Howie questioned, reaching up into the kitchen cabinets to withdraw two glasses. He tried to conceal his trembling hands, but he was far too excited that Keveney agreed to stay for a drink. He didn’t know why she affected him so, but he knew he didn’t want the feeling to dissipate. Trying to remain subdued, he moved to the fridge, waiting for an answer.

“Ice, please. I love to chew on it… One of my co-workers told me it’s because I’m trying to relieve my oh-so-obvious sexual frustrations. So, that’s why I’m always chewing on ice. But… I have no sex life…” Keveney allowed her voice to drown into the whirling of the ice dispenser when she noticed Howie blush. She smiled sheepishly. “I think that might have been too much rambling. Sex isn’t a topic to start with when you’ve just met someone… So…um… How about you tell me about yourself!”

Howie immediately pushed the last glass to the ice dispenser before grabbing two cans of Pepsi from the fridge. The small mention of sex amongst the electrified tension in Howie’s heart caused a flood of thoughts. He tried to push his mind away from the idea of Keveney’s beautiful body beneath his in a lustful passion, knowing it would keep him up that night. He did his best to muster a feeble smile, feeling his cheeks continue to burn. “What do you want to know?”

“Anything at all, like why you wanted me to stay?” Keveney started, popping her soda can open. She didn’t even seem to notice Howie’s nervousness as she watched the fizz pop amongst the bubbles that drove Howie into a deeper fascination.

“Because my daughter is really taken with you. I know some would argue that since she’s only a few weeks old that she doesn’t know who’s holding her… But I saw it the second you picked her up at the store. You’ve just got this special way with her. It’s amazing to say the least, so I had to keep you around for a little longer,” Howie spoke freely.

“She has the sweetest temperament, when she’s not screaming fitfully. She’ll be one of those most amazing children; you can see it within the depths of her watchful eyes. And those big green eyes, oh, she’ll make any person weak in the knees in a very instant! You’ll win lots of girls with her at the crook of your arm…well…if her mother doesn’t… Sorry,” Keveney instantly apologized, taking a long sip of soda. It burned down her throat as she coughed softly, feeling embarrassed for her bluntness. “I think I have this open-minded, aggressive, head-strong personality. Still trying to get it diagnosed by a leading Psychiatrist, found his name on the back of a Lucky Charm’s box.”

“It’s cute,” Howie chuckled, watching her violet eyes twinkle with relief. “But, I don’t have to worry about her mother—”

“We don’t have to talk about this—”

“No, I’d like to tell you,” Howie interrupted yet again, holding his hand up to halt her beautiful lips. He felt like she could be trusted with the depths of the secret. And he yearned to confide in her. To tell her that she already mattered in his life, even if she had just entered.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive,” Howie chuckled with a handsome smile. “In all honesty, my steady girlfriend did leave me many months ago. She didn’t want the same things I wanted out of life.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. Was she Jillian’s mother?” Keveney prompted softly.

“No, not exactly… You see… This is going to seem quite odd… But I was really depressed when I broke up with my girlfriend. So, my friend took me out to a club to get me out of this rut… We were walking to the car and I heard this crying… It was almost like a howl… Jillian… My little Jillian had been dumped in the trash, still bloody from birth. I rushed her to the hospital, but I couldn’t stand the thought of abandoning her, so I said she was mine.”

Keveney fell extremely quiet for several moments. It was an amazing story to say the least. But, Howie wasn’t concerned about her speechless state. Her exotic eyes twinkled with a soft understanding and approval. It gave him a sense of pride and relief. Needing to close the bridge of silence, he fumbled, “I know it’s a little bizarre—”

“So, let’s just lay this straight. You’re single-handedly taking care of a child who’s not tied to you by any blood? Even when you’re a twenty-eight year old famous singer with millions of fans that could have anything within this entire world?” Keveney asked with interest.

“Not single-handedly! My four friends love Jillian with all their hearts. Then I have four sisters and an older brother. Plus my parents are just overjoyed with the new grandchild. Since I’m the baby of my family, they’re always willing to— Wait, did you just say—”

“Famous, talented singer?” Keveney asked with a bemused smirk. “Yes, I did.”

“How’d you find out?” he asked with a surprised smile. Usually, women fell to his feet with that announcement. Yet, Keveney sat perfectly composed, her fingers dancing lightly over the sweating glass. Not even Roxie had given him that peace of mind over that fact. Roxie wanted others to know their status in life. But, Keveney acted as if it were a simple job, giving Howie a chance to be himself.

“Honestly, my sisters have you plastered all over their room. It’s kind of hard not to make a connection with those huge posters. But I admire you for that. To live your dream and making others happy in the process. It’s absolutely remarkable.”

“Well, thank you,” Howie answered with a firm blush. “So, am I your sisters’ favorite?”

“Do you keep a log of who’s the favorite amongst which fans… Or do you need your ego stroked?”

“I’ve always needed an ego stroke… and the log actually turns into bets,” Howie laughed heartily.

“Well, in that case, yes, you’re the favorite of the middle two.”

“Middle two?”

“I have a big family…”

“How big?”

“Well, my older sister, Stevie, is twenty four and a journalist for a popular magazine. Then there’s the identical twin girls of the house, Lillian and Lindley. They’re twelve and happen to adore you in every way. Then we have Ryan; he just turned sixteen and is dying to get his permit. Mark is eighteen and graduates this year. And finally there’s the baby Jordan and she just turned a year old.”

“Wow! Six siblings?”

“Crazy, huh?”

“No! More like a lot of love.”

“I’ll agree. It’s great having so many kids in the family. Always have someone to turn to when things get a little rough.”

“But, I’m more interested as to where you fit into that mix.”

“Me? Hmm… I’m the second oldest at twenty-one. I managed to run my Master’s courses along my Bachelor’s courses, so I just graduated with tons of experience. I moved into an apartment with Stevie. And I also started a job in the Pediatric Unit of the Orlando Hospital…” Keveney trailed, not knowing exactly what he wanted to know.

“How’s living with your older sister?” Howie asked, extremely fascinated.

“Like living with my parents only a little more Hellish and reckless,” Keveney groaned as she was alerted to a text message on her phone. Stevie was demanding for her to return home immediately before stipulations would occur. Keveney sighed before rising; she was having too much fun with Howie. “I’m so sorry, but it is late. I shouldn’t have imposed—”

“No! I really enjoyed it,” Howie interrupted, watching her linger at the doorway. He needed an excuse for her to return. His mind scrambled for an opportunity. Then, it struck like God was blessing the union. “And, I know that Jillian would love it if we made a regular thing of you visiting. Like, tomorrow around dinner? Plus a chance of offering you a job?”

“I’d enjoy that, too,” she accepted, fingering the doorknob. She turned back to Howie on a whim, needing to confide her own secret. “Howie?”

“Yes?”

“I just wanted you to know that I support you fully with Jillian. It’s beautiful that a man would accept such a large responsibility with a truly selfless love. And, I would know, because I’m also adopted.”

Chapter 7 – Welcome

“You’re grounded!” Keveney heard her older sister shout with contempt as she closed the door to their luscious apartment. Keveney briefly lifted her eyes from retrieving her keys in the lock to eye her older sister. Stevie heatedly pushed her tortoiseshell-rimmed glasses up the bridge of her nose, looking none too pleased with the younger sister’s delayed entrance into their home. She appeared to be a nervous wreck as she fumbled with the hems of her stained shirt and frayed jean shorts. Her short, pixie-styled, light brown locks fell dramatically into her faint gray eyes while her velvet red lips pursed with displeasure. Her small hands finally dropped down to perch against her slimly curved hips. She was several inches shy of Keveney’s stature, but held a temperamental flare of fire not to be teased.

Yet, Keveney seemed to fear no such flames as she pulled off her jean jacket. She tossed it to the nearby chair before kicking off her worn sneakers, then padding quietly across the thick, soft carpet of their living room. She decided to speak once she was seated comfortably on the plush couch, only seeming to egg her sister’s agitation further. “Evie, I’m twenty-one and, for the last time, you’re not Mom. So, just take a breath and tell me about your day.”

“Where were you?” Stevie continued to fire instead, seating herself primly beside her sister. She folded her silky legs in a prim, lady-like manner, offering an unusual enhancement to her usually punk-modern style. Though, Keveney looked beyond that for a moment to see the worry flicking in the depths of her sister’s beautiful irises. It was obvious that Stevie was deeply concerned about her sister, even if she were not truly linked by blood. The Moore family had adopted Keveney when Stevie was merely three years old. She had been so fascinated with the small baby and made a pact to always protect her. And Stevie had always been true to her word, even twenty-one years later.

“I had to help a patient,” Keveney explained simply. She always kept a discreet confidentiality for all her patients and their families as guided by the medical HIPPA regulations. She lived all portions of her life in that code of respect, finding it rewarding to keep such simple practices. Gossip had always gotten other women her age into too much trouble.

“At ten in the evening?” Stevie skeptically asked.

“He’s a new father and interested in striking a friendship with me.”

Stevie arched her pierced dark brow in uncertainty, but her lips finally curved into a light smile. She gently pushed on Keveney’s shoulder, her gray eyes lightening dramatically to prove that the storm of emotions was indeed over. Stevie was a brilliant woman, but always flitted around to topics like a delicate butterfly deciding on her favorite flowers. “Guess what’s up with my fantastic career that has to do with a new Daddy?!”

“Huh?” Keveney deadpanned in confusion.

“Howie Dorough of the Backstreet Boys just had a baby daughter. There have been a few reports here and there on the news and in various magazines. Some people got a few blurry pictures of him with the child, but nothing substantial. And no one knows the full story since he broke up with his long-time girlfriend, Roxanne Fields. So, Mr. Howie Dorough himself calls our magazine to offer us the full exclusive with up-close photographs. And, I’ll be the one completing the article!!” Stevie explained with a ripple of excitement.

“Backstreet Boys?” Keveney repeated, feigning a true look of innocence.

“Don’t be so naïve! You know, the group that Lil and Lind listen to every single day!”

“Oh… Wait, you have their CDs in your Explorer… Don’t tell me you’re infatuated with the same music group as Ley and Lilly!” Keveney teased with her infamous giggle, using her own nickname for their twin sisters.

“No! I’m a mature fan!” Stevie protested with a sharp snort, her cheeks blushing a furious red.

“With one of the guys’ pictures in a heart shaped frame sitting in your underwear drawer, right beneath those shimmering red thongs—”

“His name’s Brian Littrell and he happens to be quite religious and… You were snooping through my things again, Keveney Marie!” Stevie spat with fury when she drawled a quick conclusion about her sister’s sentence.

“I was looking for some boxers!”

“I don’t wear boxers!”

“Oops?”

“Keveney Marie—”

“Sorry?” Keveney whimpered with an infectious pout that always melted her family’s hearts.

“If you weren’t so damn cute, Keveney Marie.”

“I know!”

“Anyway,” Stevie gritted at Keveney’s pleased expression that caused annoyance to seep through Stevie’s form. “Aren’t you happy for me that I scored the interview? Mr. Lowe said everyone volunteered me for the assignment, saying I was the best and brightest on the team!”

“I’m so ecstatic for you, Evie!” Keveney snorted, still somewhat amused by the entire situation. Keveney had already established a somewhat confusing relationship with the man that struck stars all of her sisters’ eyes. Yet, the girls were none the wiser to their sister’s secret. Keveney curved her lips into a mischievous smile, alerting Stevie to the bout sarcasm about to appear. “I just can’t wait to see you fawn over one of the men of your dreams. Will you bring your heart shaped frame—”

“KEVENEY MARIE!” Stevie screeched, finally fed up with Keveney’s antics.

“Take me now, you gorgeous Pop-star! Oh! I’m so hot! I’m yours! Yours and only yours! Please! Ravish my body in any way you see fit!” Keveney declared with a scream of overly fabricated passion.

“You’re dead!” Stevie growled, tackling her sister with embarrassment.

*~*~*

“So, we’re all dying to know, how was your night with Jillian?” Kevin asked with a keen interest as he walked into the Dorough household ahead of the others. The oldest man instantly jogged to Jillian’s playpen, crouching down to scoop up the wide-eyed infant. She offered a sweet gurgle of a hello, causing Kevin to smile. Surprisingly, the man who had been so against little Jillian from the start had fallen the hardest in love with the small infant. It seemed perfectly natural as he cradled the child to his chest before resting on the couch.

“Interesting,” Howie replied, summing up his night in one word as the others filtered into to take their usual spots in his living room. Howie hadn’t been expecting them, but then again, the boys were always known to pop into each other’s houses without little to any warning. Each even had an extra set of keys to the others’ homes for the just in case scenarios. Though, now Howie was faced with an unusual dilemma. He really didn’t know how to bring Keveney up to his friends. And he was still enjoying the memories, envisioning Keveney’s nurturing smile as she soothed Jillian last night. It was an instant attraction between the two adults, but obviously both were shy to initiate the passion.

“Define interesting,” Brian requested, collapsing next to his cousin. He peered over Kevin’s broad shoulder, cooing down to the small newborn. Jillian’s emerald eyes fixated on Brian’s moving mouth for a moment, before sighing and closing her eyes. Brian snorted a small laugh, realizing that Jillian seemed more interested in dozing for the moment.

“What do you mean?” Howie played, feigning innocence to any possible misjudgment.

“Did you call for help?” Nick blurted plainly, unable to hold his patience. He stood above Howie with keen interest. His dark blue eyes glittered with a roguish glint, alerting Howie to deeper possibilities.

“Why do you need to know?”

“Just answer the question,” AJ demanded.

“Yes… Jillie was a little fussy last night and nothing I did seemed to calm her down. She was miserable and I got a little scared. So, since I couldn’t calm her down, I called someone to help,” Howie confessed, unable to concoct a lie without being found. He didn’t know why it was of such great importance anyway. If anything, the boys should have praised Howie for his quick wits in finding another to help.

“Hell yes! Cough it up, choirboys! Two-fifty each!” Nick rejoiced with a whoop of delight, startling Jillian. Not that it mattered, he seemed fixated on Brian and AJ’s wallets, unaware that Kevin had to soothe Jillian back to sleep.

“Wait a damn minute, Pillsbury! D, who’d you call? Your sisters or your mom?” AJ asked, smacking Nick’s eager hands away from his thick wallet.

“Neither.”

“BOO-YAH! Come to Papi!” AJ delighted, launching up from his seat. Nick howled with a raw pain, collapsing beside Brian in a fit of curses. AJ didn’t seem to mind as he hurriedly danced around until Nick and Brian delivered several crumpled bills.

“Wait, you betted on me?”

“And won!” AJ whistled, crushing a few bills into Howie’s palm. “Get yourself an expensive razor, because damn, you need it. Jillian’s already got you looking like a scurf-ball.”

“You bast—”

“Who’d you call?” Kevin interrupted in a soft tone, gently patting Jillian’s back to soothe her into a peaceful state. Jillian offered a meek cry of displeasure, but quickly started to suckle on her hand. Kevin kissed the side of her small face, her eyes finally drooping closed again.

“A woman that I met at the baby store,” Howie explained, watching his friends grow somber. Howie shifted uncomfortably, noticing the frowns finally settling upon three of the men’s faces. Howie, in turn, frowned slightly when he realized how ridiculous it sounded aloud. “Wait—”

“No, hold on,” Brian interrupted, deciding to speak for the group, the protective side obviously flaring amongst the men. “You let a strange woman into this house?”

“With the only Backstreet daughter?” Kevin scorned.

“Guys wait—” AJ tried to defend, realizing it was Keveney whom Howie was referring to.

“She could have been Michael Myers with a butcher knife!” Nick exclaimed, growing thoughtful for a moment. “Guess she would been a Michelle Myers instead of a Michael, right? ... Unless, are you sure it was a chick, D? No weird bulge in her jeans—”

“Shut up, Nick,” the group groaned as the doorbell chimed.

“Guys, cut me some slack,” Howie protested as the doorbell chimed yet again. He listened to the boys continue to berate him before turning to bicker amongst themselves. Howie sighed as he walked to the door, no one truly realizing that he was missing. He threw it open and his heart instantly fluttered at the sight. “Keveney! Hi!”

“Hey—”

“Howie! Get back in here! Don’t think you can just scurry away! We’re not done with this! I mean, honestly, how did you know she wasn’t crazed? She could have hurt Jillian! Or she could have kidnapped Jillian! Then what would we have done, huh?!” Kevin continued to rant within the depths of the living room.

“Bad time?” Keveney asked with a lighthearted smile, noticing Howie grimace.

“Not at all,” Howie quickly objected, leading Keveney into the living room. The boys complained for only a few short moments until they caught sight of Keveney’s glory. “Guys, this is Keveney Moore, the woman from the store. She’s a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and going to help us take care of Jillian. How’s that sound?”

The men exchanged looks of approval, their hearts quickening at the raw sexual passion flooding from Keveney’s delectable body. She seemed to glow with appeal in her form-fitting top displaying her busty top and the snug, black capri’s detailing the sweet curves of her lower half. She playfully tossed her honey colored locks behind her shoulders, before smoothing her hands down the length of her body. Each man’s eyes grew with intense interest, following the length of her hands before returning to her sweet face. Her violet eyes then seemed to hold the men like a siren’s voice. She offered an individual smile to each man, submitting his heart to jelly.

“Guys?” Howie called again, faintly jealous.

“Fantastic!” they burst, rushing to be the first to welcome the lovely Keveney into their clan.

Chapter 8 – Warming Kindred Hearts

“Again, it was a real treat to meet you, Keveney,” Kevin enthused yet again, fumbling to stay afoot as Howie ushered his friends to the door. Kevin thought to jibe at Howie for practically throwing them out of the house, but they understood Howie’s itching need to banish them from his home. Needless to say, all the boys had been quite impressed with Keveney. Not only was she a delectable beauty, but an intelligent, interesting, and vivacious woman, but she had stolen their hearts in a mere instant. And as much as Howie enjoyed watching his suave friends make complete idiots of themselves in front of Keveney, he found a jealous twinge flaring within his heart. He almost thought about complaining that he had found Keveney first, but figured it might sound territorial. He just wanted to spend time with Keveney alone, not within the heat of competition amongst his friends. “We hope to see you soon.”

“It was a pure pleasure, Kevin,” Keveney responded politely, shifting Jillian’s slumbering form in her arms. Jillian released a contented sigh, moving her head so her cheek pressed against Keveney’s soft shoulder. The boys could almost imagine Keveney being Jillian’s mother since she had affectionately cared for the infant since arriving.

“Will you be here often?” Brian questioned eagerly, his light blue eyes sparking with excitement.

“Well, that’s what I’m here for…” Keveney trailed with an impish smile.

“And if we should need you for other services, such as our own personal needs, like a sponge bath… Is there a personal number I could use?” Nick trailed with a seductive smirk, running his fingers haphazardly through his light blond locks as Howie gave them the final boost out the door.

“It was fun guys! See you later!” Howie blurted with horror, finally slamming the door shut in embarrassment. He hurriedly leaned against the door for support, heaving ragged breaths as his cheeks lit with a deep fire. Howie couldn’t believe that Nick had pressed his seductive moves on Keveney that he usually tried when he was in a drunken state at a local bar. Keveney wasn’t a piece of meat for their enjoyment!

“You have…unique…friends,” Keveney decided with a small laugh after a few moments passing, gently bringing Jillian to her chest to sleep. She softly rubbed the infant’s small back while easing herself into the rocking chair. Despite the men’s strange qualities in passing their sexual interests along, she found them delightful because of how loving each man was with Jillian. They took their time to express their love for the abandoned infant like they were all her fathers. It gave her such hope that all humanity was not lost in the sea of despair painted upon the television news, even those men were bizarre.

“They’re definitely unique, but that’s being extremely kind,” Howie chuckled, thankful to finally be alone with Keveney. He loved his friends like brothers, but hated the Jekyll and Hyde transformation that formed them into hormone-ridden teenagers around the beautiful women. So, Howie’s jealousy quickly flared when they switched their charms upon the lovely Keveney.

“Well, I figured I had to be kind to friends of a potential employer,” she teased, briefly glancing down to check on Jillian’s docile state. The child seemed completely content nestled against the soft swell of Keveney’s bust, gently suckling on her fingers as her eyelids drooped. Keveney had already fallen in love with the small family, so she was naturally excited to help. Yet, she planned to offer her services free of charge. Such a Good Samaritan as Howie could not be taxed for his glorious deed to raise such a defenseless infant.

“And a potential friend,” Howie quickly added.

“Well, then, as a potential friend I refuse to take any money whatsoever for the help you may need with this beautiful child—”

“But—”

“No, Howie,” Keveney interrupted with a firm tone in her usually sweet voice, proving she was quite headstrong when need be. She gently ran her fingers against Jillian’s soft cheek, keeping her violet eyes locked on Howie’s form. “I want to be just a friend who helps her friend out because it’s the right thing to do. I’m not strapped for expenses. I make great money working every other night and weekend at the hospital. Nurses are in such great demand that I’m making enough money to keep me very comfortable.”

“I don’t feel right—”

“Look, if you insist, my payment can be a great home-cooked meal at least once a week with you and Jillian. You see, my sister tends to burn everything that she puts her hands on... So, dinner is less than nourishing. Besides, I really admire what you’re doing with Jillian. People like you and my parents are an honest blessing to God’s abandoned angels.”

“So, I did hear right?” he questioned softly, not wanting to startle the woman. He had spent several sleepless nights contemplating Keveney’s last words spoken the night he first asked for help. He had almost started to believe that he was hearing things when Keveney announced she was adopted. She had been so well adjusted into life and Howie had a hard time believe someone could give up such a loving person to the cruel world. Not that it truly mattered in his eyes. He just wanted to be there for her.

“Yeah, I’m adopted,” she answered simply, not needing any further detail in his question. Her words were crisp and spoken with the soft tones of her melodious voice, offering no bitterness or anger. “My natural mother was really young when she had me. I guess she was really scared about having a child, so she gave birth and dumped me off at some remote location. Thankfully, someone found me not even an hour afterwards and took me to the nearest hospital. The hospital then released me into the adoption agency. My parents, the Moore’s, thought that they could only have one child and had a hard time conceiving that one child. So, they adopted me, but still ended up having children. Almost like a gift from God for taking me into their lives.”

“God, I’m so sorry,” Howie breathed, fascinated by the bittersweet tale of Keveney’s early life.

“I’m not. God had a purpose for doing what He did.”

“So, you’re not bitter?” Howie asked incredulously, finally admiring Keveney’s strength amongst other things. Given the circumstances, Howie would never think to scold her if she were spiteful against the maliciousness of humanity. But that was hardly the case when looking into her lovely eyes. Keveney was cheery and dazzling with an infectious smile, almost like a pure ray of golden sunshine plucked by God Himself.

“How could I be bitter?” she asked honestly, gently swaying within the rocking chair to keep Jillian settled. “I absolutely love my life and have no regrets. My best friend is my older sister, Stevie. I confide everything in her and not once in my life did she ever call me the ‘adopted’ sister. I was always her flesh and blood, her companion, and her life. My parents love me just as if I had been birthed from their love. I’m their little girl and I’ll always be their little girl. And my little siblings are a complete riot. I love them with all my heart, even if they blame their mischievousness on learning it from me. I just couldn’t have asked God for anything more… Except the chance to bond with Jillian and you.”

“The feeling’s mutual, Keveney,” Howie enthused with a faint blush adding to his already rosy cheeks.

“Please, call me Kevie.”

“Kevie?”

“Yeah, you know, my nickname?”

“Ouch,” Howie groaned with a laugh, pretending his heart had burst from her sarcasm.

“I still love you,” Keveney cooed, causing a thick silence to quickly settle amongst the two adults. She carefully shifted, feeling the sparks jump from his gorgeous eyes and scorch the depths of her heart. Keveney shifted her gaze; it felt so natural to express her love to him. She blushed, deciding to clear the tension before their friendship could become tainted with sexual aggression. “So, when do you want me over again?”

“Anytime you want,” Howie gulped, thinking about asking her to stay permanently.

“Then you won’t be able to get rid of me!”

“Good!” Howie responded, licking his dry lips. “But I do have a favor to ask.”

“Shoot.”

“A music columnist is coming over to interview me with Jillie next week. The guys have insisted that I have to do this interview by myself, but to tell you the truth, I really don’t care if they were here or not. But you… I’d feel a lot better if you were here to help me get her ready and keep me calm.”
“Moore for Music is coming to interview you?” Keveney asked with a knowing laugh.

“Yeah, that’d be the very columnist! So, would you please come over to keep me calm?”

“I’d love to,” she retorted, already brewing the mischievous havoc she could cause in her sister’s life.

Chapter 9 – Impish Infatuation

“Morning, Sunshine!” Keveney called brightly, slipping into Jillian’s nursery. It seemed like second nature just to pop around the Dorough household as if she were a member of the family. Howie had finally broken her habit of knocking, so Keveney now could experience the cherished details of the father-daughter relationship that few rarely saw. She smiled sweetly as she watched Howie lean over the crib, speaking softly to Jillian. The child lazily listened to her father’s soothing voice, greeting the early morning with the tiniest yawn. Yet, Howie seemed loaded with energy offering a sharp contrast between father and daughter, but Keveney understood. It was finally his first interview introducing Jillian into his life. Howie wanted perfection for the entire event, so Jillian would be welcomed with open arms, especially since Howie would be taking on a single-father role to the fans.

Keveney continually reminded Howie that everything would be fine. He worried so much about his career, because he realized how much it affected the population’s lives. He needed the support of everyone and feared rejection. He refused to jeopardize anyone’s futures, especially those of his best friends. But everyone supported him with a loving tenderness, constantly reminding him it was the right choice. So, Howie had sent the others away for this interview, deciding it was better for everyone involved. So, naturally, Keveney was honored that Howie asked her to help and could hardly hide the flitter of her heart.

“Funny, that’s what I said to Jillian, but she wouldn’t even open her eyes... I think she’s waiting for a good morning hello from her favorite Kevie,” Howie greeted with a handsome smile, motioning for Keveney to join him. He loved how she surprised them in the mornings, peeking in when they seemed to long for her the most. That day she offered a quick jump-start to his already fevering heart. Her smile always warmed his insides like the warmest cup of his mother’s home-made soup.

“Well, I couldn’t possibly deny Jillie Bean’s request,” Keveney quickly agreed, leaning over the crib beside Howie. She clicked her tongue at the alert infant, causing a smile to erupt from the child’s pursed lips. Keveney immediately cooed with awe, “That’s my girl! Good morning, Sweetheart! Ready for your Daddy’s big day? You have to be extra cute for all those pictures! Make everyone fall in love with you!”

Jillian offered a grunt and then pursed her lips almost with a tinge of question, immediately thrusting her legs in an excited manner. Howie laughed with approval, finally scooping his daughter from the crib to kiss her forehead. She instantly cuddled against him, thrusting her fingers into her mouth. “She’s got her facial expressions perfected. Now she just needs a bath and a gorgeous outfit.”

“Well, let me get started—”

“No, Kevie, I got it,” Howie interrupted. He didn’t want Keveney to think he only needed her for the nanny position. He wanted her to feel comfortable, like a portion of the family. He could bathe and dress his daughter, giving Keveney an opportunity to rest from her late night shift at the hospital. Howie smiled, gently brushing his shoulder against hers as he moved to get passed her. He felt a sharp spark of heat transfer between them, causing Keveney to instantly perk with a smile.

“Then what am I here for?”

“Emotional support of a best friend?” Howie decided with question as he balanced Jillian in one arm while gathering her bathtub and supplies. He glanced up from his balancing act to see Keveney’s light violet eyes spark with amusement, causing him to chuckle. Howie and Keveney had quickly attached to one another as the days passed in their budding friendship. And Howie’s attraction to her only seemed to grow stronger with each visit. Her quirky personality always brought a smile to his and Jillian’s faces, even on the gloomiest of days. And Howie couldn’t deny the sexual tension that settled around them with increasing intensity. He realized that he was already infatuated and possibly in love with this wonderful woman.

Now, Howie just needed the courage for the approach.

“Emotional support, huh?” Keveney snorted softly, taking the bath supplies from Howie’s arms. He offered a relieved smile, immediately cradling Jillian into the crook of his arm. Keveney shrugged her shoulders, carrying the infant’s tub to the master bathroom for Howie.

“Yes, emotional support! Plus I need someone to pick out a beautiful outfit for Jillie and hopefully get me some breakfast?” Howie pouted, cuddling Jillian in his arms.

“And the truth shall make Keveney a slave!” Keveney exclaimed like a spirited Reverend leading his congregation in a stirring revival. Keveney leaned to kiss Jillian’s cheek as she listened to Howie chuckle from her obviously outrageous impersonation. She smiled up at Howie before offering a delicate kiss to his cheek. “You’re just lucky I love you.”

Howie felt his heart catch as he watched Keveney disappear down the hall. He gently eased the bathroom door closed, leaning against it while Jillian cooed softly to herself. Howie sighed, “So, close, Jillie Bean. So close.”

*~*~*

Keveney hummed softly to herself as she listened to the water run before sauntering back to the nursery to fulfill Howie’s requests. She loved how she always felt needed in the home, but just wished that sometimes it was for other romantic reasons. Drawing herself into pleasant thoughts, she opened the creamy yellow curtains to expose the crisp, clean ocean waves crashing against the sandy shore. She opened the window to inhale the salty breeze for a moment before returning to the dresser. She then started to absentmindedly sort through the tiny garments. She briefly glanced between each piece of clothing, but found her eyes traveling about the room to stop at various framed photographs. Finally, her curiousness getting the best of her, she stopped and picked up the first frame.

A pleased smile curved to her glossed lips, noting it was a picture of Howie and Jillian. It looked to be Jillian’s first day at the beach. The tiny girl was dressed in a sweet yellow bonnet to compliment a cotton sundress printed with baby bees fluttering amongst patches of white daises. She looked like a small princess nestled against her father’s bare chest as he lay on the sandy beach. His arms were drawn securing around the infant to protect her from any harm the salty winds might provide while they both offered smiles brighter than the sun.

Keveney exhaled a soft breath of admiration, easing the picture down to its proper place. She then picked up another photograph of Howie at the beach with AJ. Her brain seemed to mentally delete AJ’s presence as she focused upon Howie. Her eyes first locked upon the warmth radiating from his passionate eyes as his short brown locks tussled in the strong, salty breeze. Her eyes then traveled down the length of his fit, muscular body, finally realizing the strength he possessed. She then naturally traced down the subtle lines of his tight abdomen that drew down to the depths of his raw sexual power. Her cheeks immediately flushed with a raw excitement that couldn’t be explained. Yet as intrigued as she was with his physique, her eyes finally lingered the longest on his smiling lips. Those were the lips she dreamed of kissing.

How she wanted him in so many ways. Her desolate mind mostly focused upon the physical needs during the lonely nights curled under a cold comforter while she deliberated her failure for romance. She spent agonizing nights pondering how it would feel to lay nestled in his warm embrace, feeling his nimble fingers trace lightly over the contours of her hungry body. She would instantly curl into his strong arms to promote the exchange between them, trailing sweet kisses along the length of his neck. He would then offer sweltering kisses back to escalate the fervor, sweeping her into a passionate affair of love.

But as much as she longed for the physical company, her needs for Howie didn’t just solely lie within physical attraction. He had stolen her heart in so many other ways. Like his compassion and unending love for the abandoned child. So many men would have turned away from the desperate cries or considered their duty fulfilled once the child was handed over to the hospital. Yet, Howie took the grandest and most benevolent step anyone could think take – offering the child never-ending love. And he actually cared enough to make sure Keveney was okay with her childhood. Not once did he take advantage of her golden heart. Instead, he offered his purely golden heart back in exchange. Then Keveney focused upon his sweet disposition that caused never ending smiles to erupt from his friends. Now matter how Keveney figured, she could only come to one conclusion - she loved him.

Now if she could only father the courage to tell him so.

Sighing, Keveney busied herself with the infant’s clothing, trying to transfer her focus. She shifted further into the piles of clothing to pull out the perfect outfit. A soft lavender dress with intricate detailing of baby lambs napping along the bottom portion. She then retrieved a small purple hat to compliment the outfit, obviously given to her by her Uncle AJ.

Keveney then flicked her eyes to her watch, noticing a chunk of time had passed. She shook her head, hurriedly setting the outfit upon the changing table with a fresh diaper. She moved out of the room and down the hallway. She couldn’t imagine what was taking Howie so long with Jillian. The child was only a month old and already loved bathing. So, she shouldn’t have given him any problems. Keveney clicked her tongue, “Where’s Howie?”

Keveney’s question was only answered with a sharp splash of water followed by a string of unnatural curses. Her heart immediately leapt to her throat as hormones were dumped into her system to initiate the natural Fight-Or-Flight reaction. She took no regard for privacy as she rushed into the bathroom, only able to think about protecting Howie and Jillian. She expected the worst possible situation, immediately fumbling to retrieve her cell phone from her back pocket. She stumbled into the bathroom with shock, her fears quickly replaced with relief and amusement.

“What happened?” Keveney laughed, glancing at Jillian. The infant was lying upon the floor on a soft terry towel, perfectly content as she sucked on her fingers. Knowing Jillian was safe, Keveney’s eyes traveled back to Howie, biting down hard on her bottom lip to keep from laughing. The large splash had been Howie diving into the large bath. And he seemed none to pleased with the results as he sputtered the soapy water from his mouth, wrinkling his nose in utter disgust at the taste. He struggled to get away from the slippery tub while pulling the damp locks from his eyes, but only managed to fall back into the tub to further soak himself while bubbles sloshed onto the floor.

“It was her or me!” Howie exclaimed, pulling the water-logged shirt from his muscular form for some kind of comfort. There was no logical way to explain this folly, both adults knew that much. A faint blush crept to his cheeks, obviously embarrassed for Keveney stumbling upon this less than flattering scene.

“Well…” Keveney trailed, glancing down at the dry infant. Her eyes then locked upon his wet form with a mischievous smile. “Looks like you lost…”

Chapter 10 – Meeting Amusements

Howie offered his most gracious smile as he welcomed the reporter into his home after the chiming of the door had roused him from his bedroom. It had been havoc trying to muster some of his remaining dignity after plummeting into the tub in front of Keveney. He had hoped to exude some elegant charm on her behalf, but only seemed to befoul any vain attempt he made. He had darted down the stairs as if he were on an impossible mission, praying that Keveney would not appear. But he had no need to worry, collecting himself when he realized she was still taking care of Jillian. Now, he could only hope that his suave appearance would do justice on both Keveney and the reporter and that he would conquer any outrageous embarrassments that were known to precede him.

Yet, as worried as he was about making a wonderful impression, Howie found himself equally mesmerized by the lovely, petite brunette as she entered. She exuded such a beautiful quality that actually hazed with a mysterious essence of fiery excitement. And something about her gray eyes immediately reminded him of Keveney, but Howie shook those thoughts free, knowing he had to focus. It was his first true interview without the boys somewhere on the premises, so he had to be utterly fantastic. Kevin was grouchy enough; Howie wasn’t about to suffer under his brutality for a minor mishap during a simple interview. Focusing his straying thoughts yet again, Howie led the woman into his living room.

“It’s nice to meet you… Mrs. Moore?”

“Miss Moore,” she corrected with a delicate smile. “Just in case one of you boys needs a date to an awards show…”

“I’ll pass the word along,” Howie chuckled, offering her a seat. The mysteriousness of the fiery flicker that wrapped around her aura quickly faded into a simple personality trait, so he continued to study. Howie watched in awe as she primly sat upon the couch, crossing her legs delicately at her small ankles while retrieving a tape recorder in one fluid motion. She seemed to be all about the business at hand with a sweet touch of old-feminine charm, which comforted Howie.

“Let’s get down to business,” she declared, furiously scribbling upon her tablet, giving Howie a striking conclusion that she might be slightly upset about the obvious lack of people within his home.

“Upset that it’s only me, Miss Moore?” Howie dared to comment, hoping she wouldn’t become offended.

“Huh?”

“You are a fan, correct?”

She finally blushed, glancing down. “How’d you—”

“I’ve read your column.”

“Oh, yes… I do appreciate your music very much. I find it quite…comforting… But please, my name’s Stevanie,” she laughed when Howie wrinkled his nose at the feminine form of such a masculine name. It was the usual response she received when announcing her proper name. “My father’s name is Steven and my parents had a hard time conceiving. It was a pure miracle that I was even born, so I got my father’s name just in case... Needless to say, we ended up adopting two children and having three more, two being twins…”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, quite the Lifetime story, but please, call me Stevie.”

“Okay, Stevie,” Howie approved, settling back on the opposite couch. He folded his hands into his lap with a kind smile, anxious to tell his story. He listened to Stevie set up the tape with the proper names and dates before placing it between them upon the coffee table.

“So, Mr. Dorough—”

“Please, call me Howie.”

“Okay, so Howie, where’s this bundle of joy that’s barely been in the papers?”

“She’s upstairs with a good friend of mine. She’s kind of like a nanny of sorts… But they’ll be right down, I promise.”

“Perfect, could I get a picture for the article?”

“Of course. My friend is making sure that she has the perfect outfit for her debut.”

“Great!” Stevie enthused, settling back onto his couch yet again. She titled her large notepad and immediately started to jot furiously in a cryptic language as they spoke. “So, it’s official! We finally have the first Backstreet Baby?”

“Yes,” Howie chuckled.

“Boy or girl to follow in Daddy’s footsteps?”

“A baby daughter as surprising as it seems.”

“Congratulations,” Stevie immediately cooed.

“Thank you very much.”

“What’s her name?”

“Jillian Luz Dorough.”

“That’s gorgeous…”

“AJ actually helped me out with her name if you can believe it…”

“Hardly,” she laughed, “What’s her birth date?”

“October twenty-fourth, so she’ll be two months on Christmas Eve next week.”

“Quite the Christmas present, huh?”

“Couldn’t have asked for a better present,” Howie enthused with a soft smile, deciding to weave a quick white web for the public’s benefit. “I know most single fathers would find it Hellish, but I couldn’t be happier having my daughter. I just love the idea of starting my own family, even if it’s a little smaller than what others are used to. Besides, my family, especially my mother and sisters, are always stocking my cabinets full of food. And the guys actually have stepped up to act as surrogate fathers, giving Jillian all the love she needs and more.”

“But what about a mother-figure? Haven’t you parted from your latest girlfriend—”

“My girlfriend was out of the picture before Jillian arrived…” Howie explained softly, delicately treading around the false portions of his tale. “And I’d like to keep her mother’s name private since she left, because she did the right thing. And don’t worry about Jillian being too over-loaded on testosterone. My good friend has been filling that position. She’s so tender with Jillian and they’re inseparable. So, she has all she needs—”

“Miss Dorough is ready for her debut!” Keveney drawled dramatically as if she were Marilyn Monroe, carrying the small infant into the living room. She swept with a great elegance, pretending to fan herself and Jillian. Though, Jillian seemed more interested in chewing her upon her small fingers, her eyes fixed upon Keveney’s beautiful face. Howie immediately stood to bring Jillian into his arms, offering a kiss to the cooing infant’s cheek. Keveney then smiled when Stevie shakily stood from her position on the couch, knowing that chaos was about to erupt.

“Stevie, I’d like you to meet Jillian, my daughter. And my good friend—”

“Keveney Marie Moore!” Stevie exploded in a furious shock, interrupting Howie’s introduction. She pointed accusingly toward the younger sister as all the color seemed to drain from her face. “You… I… You… You… Little… You…”

“You’re not interviewing Eminem, Evie,” Keveney giggled.

“YOU—

Howie looked flabbergasted at the exchange as he turned to Keveney in wonderment. “You know her, Kevie?”

“Yeah, that’s my big sister,” Keveney grinned with delight

*~*~*

“I honestly had no idea you two were related!” Howie reflected in awe as he gazed between the two sisters. Needless to say, Howie was still utterly perplexed over the information he received that day and naturally the interview had died from its intended purpose. Though, instead of parting ways, the trio of adults transformed the interview into a small get together when Keveney revealed the exciting news. Not that Howie truly cared, because he was absolutely fascinated with the revelations at hand. Just connecting with another member of Keveney’s family gave a tangible edge to Howie’s passionate dreams of claiming Keveney as his own. And he found a keen interest in watching their hilarious interactions, proving that not all sisters mirrored one another.

“Well, Kevie didn’t even bother mentioning that she knew you. So, we’re even with Kevie’s sneakiness,” Stevie offered, glaring to her younger sister with an overwhelming sense of contempt. The shock of seeing Keveney in the Dorough household had been earth-shattering and deathly detrimental to Stevie’s sanity. Yet, as crazy as she felt, Stevie had to keep a cool exterior for the sake of her job. She didn’t want to be too informal with a client, because her job was highly important in her life. So, she simply just planned to throttle Keveney within an inch of death at home.

“Whoops?” Keveney innocently mocked, resting Jillian in her playpen for a nap. She knew it might not have been the smartest idea to turn away from Stevie, because she could almost feel Stevie’s sharp glares piercing into her flesh. Though, Stevie’s deadly glares that unnerved her coworkers and friends only seemed to egg Keveney’s mischievousness further. Keveney knew her life was in danger tonight, but it was well worth the consequences just to see Stevie’s stunned face.

“Yeah, whoops,” Stevie retorted sarcastically, only making Keveney smile further.

“But I should have known!” Howie laughed, not really understanding the knowing exchange between the sisters.

“Because both our last names are Moore? Or the fact that I told you my sister’s name was Stevie and she told you to call her Stevie?” Keveney quipped, obviously unable to resist.

“She’s such an imp!” Stevie laughed in shock, admiring her sister’s boldness.

“Ouch,” Howie groaned, clutching his heart. Keveney passed a sweet smile, causing chaos within Howie as much as outside. He returned the smile before glancing between the girls. “Okay, okay, okay! True, but I had other hints…”

“Like?” Stevie pondered.

“You have the same mannerisms, but are separated into the extremes… Like Kevie always slouches and you sit like you’ve gone to charm school. Kevie’s smile is mischievous compared to your sly grin… And your eyes twinkle where Kevie’s glitter… Am I making any sense?”

“Not really…” Stevie laughed.

“But that’s okay!” Keveney continued.

“Because have medication for that,” they finished together, causing a stir of laughter within the house.

*~*~*~

“Keveney Marie Moore! You’re dead! Do you hear me? Absolutely, utterly, no doubt from God himself, dead! You better make your peace with God, stick your head between your legs, and kiss your ass goodbye! Oh! And write up the will! Leave everything to me as payment for your stupid prank today! You made me look like such a freak!” Stevie exploded as she entered the apartment, kicking her shoes across the length of the living room. She had just returned from submitting the Dorough article to her editor. Needless to say, it was the perfect piece, but Keveney’s antics had been utterly ridiculous. So, when Stevie returned to see Keveney’s car in the driveway, she prepared to deliver a sharp speech that would make Keveney’s ears ring.

“Why is it whenever you see me that you feel the need to threaten my life?” Keveney yawned, focusing on her current task without paying much mind to her sister. She sat on the living room carpet, surrounded by bows, gifts, paper, and tape. Thankfully, Keveney had shopped early for the Christmas holiday as to decrease the unneeded tension in her life. So, she planned to have all her Christmas wrapping done that day, including Howie’s gift and Jillian’s gift.

“Because you’re a bad seed and need punished!”

“A bad seed?”

“Yes! A child of the Devil himself!”

“Oh, I’ve been a bad, bad girl! Punish me, Master! Punish me!” Keveney giggled with amusement, wiggling her behind at her sister with a delighted moan.

“You’re impossible!” Stevie fumed with a sharp growl, delivering a kick to Keveney’s exposed rump. Keveney fell into a pile of pillows, actually laughing hysterically at the series of events. Her beautiful laughter only seemed to infuriate Stevie further. She leapt onto her younger sister with a sweeping attack, tickling her excessively. “WHAT IS SO FUNNY? DO YOU NEED A VISIT TO THE INSANE ASYLUM AGAIN OR WHAT?”

“The look on your face when I brought Jillian down!” Keveney snorted.

“You made me look like such a goober!”

“It’s not hard—”

“KEVENEY!”

“Then that’s the job I applied for?”

“But in front of a celebrity?” Stevie groaned.

“Oh, please! Off the high horse, you’re giving me a neck-ache! He’s a normal person, Evie. Puts his pants on one leg at a time and actually even stands up to pee! And, most importantly, he’s a normal father with a heart of pure gold,” Keveney enthused with a soft smile, finally growing serious as Stevie relaxed. “And he’s a terrific friend.”

“I bet...” Stevie drawled with a click of her tongue, already sensing the sexual tension stirring between her sister and the celebrity.

“Whatever,” Keveney groaned, deciding not to focus on her sister’s ill-conceited thoughts.

“Have you met the others?” Stevie countered curiously, obviously awed.

“You mean the one in your underwear drawer, specifically?”

“Keveney!”

“Yes! Okay? Yes, I’ve met them!”

“What are they like?”

“Hmm, normal men… But damn they’re in desperate need of a good screw! Hell, that’s why I got such a good price on your number—”

“Keveney Marie!”

Chapter 11 – Blame It On The Mistletoe

“C’mon, Jillie! Smile for Daddy! C’mon! Don’t be shy! It’s for our Christmas tape. Yeah… Ah… Ah… Oh… Woah… Almost! C’mon, Sweetheart! Daddy will buy you a brand new Lexus!” Howie encouraged dramatically, sitting back on his legs with the camcorder poised for action. His entire family had just left after Christmas dinner, showering Howie and Jillian with tons of lovely gifts. Though, as special as each one seemed to be, Howie had become instantly attached to the new camcorder, which his mother bought to catch prized family moments of Jillian. Now, Howie allowed Jillian to play on the floor with her bundles of colorful toys in hopes to catch something adorable.

Yet, Jillian didn’t seem to care about her camera debut. Instead, she quietly fumbled and nibbled on her various Christmas presents, obviously pleased with her first Christmas. Howie chuckled softly with defeat, zooming the camera onto the growing infant. He couldn’t believe he had been a father for exactly two months. Never had he imagined God doing such a miraculous transformation with the tiniest package. He loved her more than life itself, even if she wouldn’t smile for the camera.

“Jillie, is this a hopeless cause?” Howie finally groaned, preparing to set the camera down, but the opening door caught his attention.

“Merry Christmas, Doroughs!” Keveney’s voice sounded.

Howie felt his heart skip at Keveney’s voice, the same reaction he always had whenever she appeared. He had invited her over for Christmas cookies and was overly impressed that she had actually accepted. He quickly tried to busy himself so he wouldn’t seem so pathetic, but noticed Jillian’s emerald eyes frantically search for Keveney. Howie offered a bright grin, leaning over to his daughter’s wiggling form. “What’s the matter, Jillie? Do you hear our Kevie?”

“She better hear her Kevie,” Keveney chuckled with a playful grumble, leaning over Howie’s shoulder to wave at the little girl. Howie noticed Jillian’s eyes shift immediately to the sound of her favorite voice. Keveney offered a bright smile, moving to sit beside Jillian’s blanket. She immediately started to rub Jillian’s back while speaking. “Hey, Jillie Bean! How’s my favorite candy cane?! Did Santa visit you last night?”

Howie watched through his camcorder in awe as Jillian sparked like a bright candle. She furiously kicked her tiny legs with delight, smiling with a variety of pitched coos. Howie laughed in surprise as Jillian actually rolled to Keveney’s lap. “How’d you get her to do that?!”

“Do what?” Keveney questioned, bringing Jillian into her arms.

“Roll!”

“She wanted to do it.”

“But she’s never done that for me!”

“Then it’s her first time,” Keveney praised, pressing a warm kiss to the child’s forehead as Howie continued to tape. She shifted the cooing child to sit in her lap for Howie. “Tell Daddy Merry Christmas, Jillie Bean—”

“Jillie Bean?” Howie laughed further, arching his dark brows. “Isn’t that the wrong holiday?”

“Awe, Daddy’s trying to use his gift from Santa – Humor… Guess he didn’t get the directions,” Keveney cooed sweetly, causing Jillian to squeal as if she were laughing at her father.

“Point taken,” Howie groaned, finally turning off the camera.

“I still love you and I brought you gifts,” Keveney announced with a sweet smile, grasping her messenger bag, and cradling Jillian in her lap.

“We got something for you, too,” Howie approved.

“Hopefully Jillian picked it out.”

“Ouch, that was definitely aimed at the heart.”

“Better than below the belt…”

“You’re on fire tonight, you know that?”

“Sorry,” Keveney laughed with yet another beautiful smile. She clicked her tongue while opening her bag, retrieving the gifts she had spent so long acquiring. She first freed a velvety soft, violet colored teddy bear, offering it to the child. Jillian immediately reached to grasp the large bear and chewed lovingly upon its ear. “Glad you like it, Sweetheart.”

“It’s adorable, thank you so much,” Howie replied, listening to Jillian offer a pitch of coos and grunts to the teddy as if she were discussing something quite intellectual. She had received so many teddy bears throughout the day, but only seemed to respond to Keveney’s bear with her sweet coos and gurgles. It awed Howie, knowing that Keveney continued to offer motherly affection to Jillian. And, so desperately Howie already wished she were.

“No problem. I’d give her the world if I could.”

“My sentiments exactly.”

“Except, you can give her the world, Mr. Dorough,” Keveney chided with an impish glint glittering within the depths of her violet eyes. She carefully shifted Jillian again to retrieve the other wrapped package in her messenger bag. She offered it to Howie with a surprisingly shy smile, almost as if she were nervous about his reaction. “And with that in mind, take it easy on me when you see what I bought you.”

“Keveney,” Howie sighed, loathing her last statement in the very pit of his heart. He would love whatever she gave to him, because it was given from her heart. Money didn’t matter and never would.

“Just open it,” Keveney encouraged quietly, seeming to understand silently.

“I just want you to know…” Howie trailed as he peeled back the layers of bright colored paper, almost preparing to reveal the depths of his feelings. Though, he became enraptured, gasping softly in surprise when he revealed a hardback baby book. A little girl on the front was pictured lying in the pink and blue tinged clouds with beautiful tear-drop-shaped eyes gazing up at the viewer with hope. The heading read: My Beautiful Baby Girl.

“This is absolutely gorgeous, Kevie.”

“I’m glad you like it,” Keveney approved, scooting close to Howie with Jillian in her lap. She leaned over his shoulder, peering at the blank pages where he would record every memory of Jillian in his life. “Every Daddy needs a baby book. You record her entire life with you right here so you’ll never forget a thing. Plus, she can look back at it and see how much her Daddy will always love her. It’s also a Precious Moments book, so it’ll have Bible Passages. I was raised on Precious Moments. I hoped you’d like it.”

“I love it,” Howie enthused, flicking his eyes upward to catch himself falling into her deep violet eyes with little warning. His heart started to thump with anticipation as he nervously licked his lips. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome,” she replied, her voice catching just below a whisper. The romantic magnetism of their initial meeting seemed to rise with every passing moment they spent together. Her eyes smoldered with a heated passion as she leaned closer than ever before. She found herself focusing on the idea of his lips against hers with the rarest heat she had never experienced. “Howie?”

“Yeah?”

“I just…” Keveney let her voice drop as Jillian’s coos ceased into a silent wonder. It was almost as if Jillian expected the union and welcomed it fully, just offering the smallest yawn and closing her eyes. Keveney leaned forward as she moistened her lips, fully prepared for what awaited. She decided to finally let her body speak for her heart, wanting everything Howie could possibly offer. Anticipation rose to the highest levels as their lips were mere centimeters from connecting.”

“AWE! LOOK AT THE PRE-MADE FAMILY! IT’S THE CLEAVERS IN A BOX!” AJ’s voice cackled, shattering the romantic heat filling the room. Keveney and Howie instantly pulled away with embarrassed blushes, obviously regretting the unlocked door. AJ seemed oblivious as he hurried the other men into the room with cheery smiles. “Merry Christmas!”

“Likewise,” Keveney murmured, easing Jillian back into her car-seat while acting as if nothing had happened. She blew a kiss to the smiling infant, handing over the teddy bear, and grabbing her bag. She anxiously brushed her fingers through her straight golden locks as she scrambled to her feet. It had been far too close of a call. She took the intrusion as an appropriate omen, instantly backing from her feelings. “But I should be going—”

“Why? I just got here!” Nick exclaimed with a pitiful pout, enhancing the sorrow of the other four.

“You’re breaking my heart,” Keveney sighed with an affectionate smile, patting Nick’s cheek. “But, you need your time with Howie. Plus, I’ve got to get back to my family.”

“Are you at least going to give us Christmas hugs?” Nick continued to protest.

“Would that be the very least I can do?” Keveney teased, squeezing the older man affectionately.

“The very least,” Nick agreed, hugging her close. “But a kiss would—”

“Woah! Next person!” Keveney sang, moving toward Brian.

“Yeah, I get nervous when he dips me for a kiss, too,” Brian shivered. “Merry Christmas, Kevie.”

“Thanks, you, too,” Keveney responded as she was passed to AJ. “I think I might get dizzy.”

“Get used to it with this family. Merry Christmas, hope you have a great New Year and maybe we’ll see you during it?”

“Maybe…” Keveney agreed mysteriously, moving to hug Kevin. “Finally, I can leave!”

“Oh, that’s sweet,” Kevin grumbled.

“Down-right adorable,” Keveney teased, squeezing him. “Merry Christmas.”

“Likewise,” Kevin returned, watching her move out of the living room.

“Kevie! Wait!” Howie blurted as she opened the door, finally making his body react to the turmoil in his heart. He couldn’t allow her to leave so quickly, not after he had spent such a large time toiling over what to buy her. He retrieved a small box and rushed toward her. “Your present! Please, open it before you rush out of here!”

“Sorry,” Keveney laughed, immediately taking the box into her hand. She pulled on the box to free the purple ribbon wrapped around the length of the small box. She then opened the velvet box and her eyes instantly widened with wonder. It was a small, silver, heart-shaped locket with Celtic knots engraved perfectly into the silver. She eased the locket open to find Howie and Jillian’s pictures nestled sweetly within the locket as a precious memento for her heart. Keveney sighed, she was utterly speechless.

“You’re part of our family now,” Howie whispered, helping her with the locket.

“Thank you so much!” Keveney enthused, hugging him tightly without thought.

“You’re welcome!”

“DAMNIT!” Nick immediately cursed, ruining the sweet moment.

“Shut up,” Brian hissed.

“I should have caught her under—”

“Um… D?” AJ called, interrupting both the bickering and the hug.

“Hmm?”

“Look up.”

Howie and Keveney slowly parted and glanced upward. Keveney’s eyes widened when she finally understood – the Mistletoe. As tradition, Howie had hung the fabled mistletoe in within the threshold of his front doorway. He didn’t exactly think it would work to catch anyone into a kiss. And Keveney wasted no time, deciding to indulge in the sweet Christmas tradition. She smiled softly as she cupped Howie’s face in her hands, sending warm sensations flooding through both their bodies. She then tilted her head ever so slightly and pushed onto her tip-toes for their lips to meet in the sweetest of holiday kisses.

“Merry Christmas, Howie,” Keveney whispered when they parted, slipping out the door.

Chapter 12 – Fair Game

AJ smirked with amusement as he glanced down to his watch, watching the second hand furiously fly around the bolder numbers marking every hour. Five minutes had actually passed since Keveney left and Howie still stood in the doorway, looking out at the night sky with pure wonderment. He was poised in the stiffest fashion, a hand still fixed on his warm lips as it had been when Keveney parted that night. Keveney’s Christmas kiss had thrown Howie into a blurred sense of delight, completely shielding him from the realities around him. He seemed to forget everything, causing a slight annoyance to fix among his visitors. Though, AJ found it slightly endearing as he studied his older friend. None of them had ever been so mystified by a woman, but there always had to be a first. Besides, there had been an instant connection between Keveney and Howie at the store – AJ had seen that first hand. It was as if God had molded their hearts together Himself the second their eyes met. Now, AJ just watched God’s creation of love unfold with childlike wonder.

“He’s acting like Keveney just flashed her boobs!” Nick hissed with a snort of amusement, shattering AJ’s silent reflection over his friend’s Christmas blessing. He quickly blinked away his own daze, glancing to the youngest band member in shock. Usually, AJ was the one to divulge with the raunchiest of jokes. It seemed as if Nick might be taking his place for the New Year.

“Like you wouldn’t be the same way,” Brian suddenly scorned, taking Kevin’s position in the group since Nick had stolen AJ’s place. He prepared to offer the bitterest glare to the blonde, until he heard the softest whimper from the playpen. Brian hurried to Jillian’s aid, peering down at the small infant. She was furiously wrapped within her blankets, her face flushed with the brightest of pinks. Brian assumed she was aching for her father, so he brought her into the most secure hug to his chest. He then gently bounced the infant, carrying her back to the group while speaking in soft tones.

“No!” Nick defended with spite, puffing his chest with arrogance.

“Dude, he’s right… We’d need a bucket for his horny juice and a fresh pair of pants,” AJ mused with a snicker, quickly seizing back his title.

“Hey!”

“Someone’s getting fussy!” Brian interrupted as Jillian actually started to whine from Brian’s embrace. She was obviously unpleased with his attempts at consoling her, wanting something more. She squirmed wildly, flailing her legs with discomfort. Brian shifted uncomfortably as Jillian finally cried out, obviously not familiar with this shift in moods. Jillian was always a pleasant baby, loving to be cradled. Yet, she wanted no part of that this evening. Brian hurriedly gazed to Howie, immediately kicking him gently within the back of the leg. “Daddy, come conscious, please!”

“Whoops, sorry,” Howie murmured, stumbling slightly against the doorway. He immediately snapped out of his giddy daze once he heard Jillian’s obvious distress. He swiftly moved to bring Jillian to his chest, soothingly rubbing her back. Her painful cries muffled into his chest, flailing just a few more moments before slowly relaxing. Howie was surprised at her rough outburst, noticing the slight increase in her body temperature. He frowned as he placed several kisses to her downy curls. “Jillie Bean just misses her Kevie, huh?”

“She’s not the only one,” Nick commented with a wry smile.

“Hush!” Kevin quickly reproached, pushing sharply on Nick’s forehead. The younger man didn’t seem to expect the force behind Kevin’s action, stumbling backward in surprise. He couldn’t maintain any type of balance, hitting the couch with a loud thump. Kevin didn’t seem to care, though, just continuing to focus on the unhappy Jillian. She had been soothed within her father’s arms for only a moment, but quickly broke back into the softest whines and whimpers that hurt worse than the piercing wails. All the men noted the bizarre change in the child’s behavior, though none seemed to know how to comment upon it. “Maybe she’s just tired, D?”

“That, too,” Howie agreed uneasily, settling back onto the couch. He released the softest sigh, rocking Jillian from side to side. He kissed her forehead yet again, praying her disgruntled nature was just due to the craziness of the holiday. Doing his best, her whimpers were replaced yet again with just the smallest of hiccups. He gently patted her back, gazing to his friends. “So, how were your Christmas’s?”

“Great, but we’re more interested in yours,” AJ responded, launching himself onto the couch like a missile departing from its aircraft.

“Huh, why?” Howie deadpanned with suspicion.

“Because… We want to know how many times you purposely pushed Keveney under the mistletoe?” Brian pondered with interest, wiggling his light brows with an animated humor.

“Why would I do that?” Howie blushed, knowing his feelings had finally been caught within the brightness of the limelight.

“Oh, don’t play the stinky shit!” Nick scoffed loudly, causing the others to cringe at his crudeness. He plopped down next to Howie, jostling Jillian from her light sleep. Howie did his best not to curse, soothing Jillian back to sleep. Nick didn’t care, however. “We know you’ve got a major hard-on for the chick. And, Hell yeah, you deserve a good screw—”

“We just mean to say that you look quite interested in Keveney,” Kevin corrected.

“Me?” Howie gasped, blushing furiously. He had hoped to keep his emotions private as to not startle Keveney. He still was unable to read her thoughts regarding him, so he stayed within the safest zone possible. Yet, with the boys aware of his feelings, everywhere would be considered a red-hot zone of trouble. “No! No way! That mistletoe thing was just a fluke. I didn’t really know that I had one of those up there. It was a friendly kiss. Besides, we’re just good friends. She’s such a sweetheart; I wouldn’t even think to make anything physical out of our friendship...”

“Oh, yeah?” AJ laughed, obviously not buying the manure.

“Yes,” Howie answered, not liking the glint in AJ’s eyes.

“So, you think she’s a great person?”
“A terrific person. She’d be a wonderful girlfriend… For someone else that is!”

“Oh…” AJ drawled, clicking his tongue. “I have to agree with you on that one, D.”

“Really?”

“Yes, sir. She’s got a great personality. She’s funny, smart, and extremely sharp. She always seems to keep everyone on their toes when she’s around. The best part is that she’s absolutely gorgeous.”

“Any man would be lucky to have her,” Kevin commented, catching AJ’s drift.

“Yes, any man would be lucky to have her…” Howie drawled carefully.

“And, you’d only want the best for her, right?”

“Of course…”

“So, she’s fair game for us, right? Since she’s such a sweetheart and all, you should only hope that one of your best friends would fall in love with her. And, if you’re good friends, you should hope that she would fall in love with someone who desires her greatly. Which I guarantee is every single one of us. And we’re not bad guys, right?”

“Well—”

“And you’re not into her, so it just makes sense that we should get first dibs at this wonder girl. One of us has to be compatible with her—”

“She’s not a piece of meat!”

“We know, but if she should happen to have any interest—”

“No way! We’re not passing her around like some party favor!”

“D, just tell us you dig her,” Brian laughed. “We’ll leave her alone.”

“I don’t dig her,” Howie fussed.

“Then she’s fair game?” AJ contemplated yet again.

“You son of a—”

“Hey, now,” Kevin laughed.

“Fine! She’s…fair…game…” Howie swallowed after a long moment, still unable to confess his feelings. He wasn’t brave enough after leaving Roxie. He feared falling into another relationship, no matter how much he desired Keveney. Though, the boys could already see the truth reflecting in Howie’s dark eyes. They would never step into Howie’s obvious territory, but tormenting the older man was just second nature to the younger boys. And the thrill of the chase was unquenchable.

*~*~*

Howie yawned softly as he eased himself onto his plush king-sized bed. It had been quite an exhausting Christmas, but also extremely joyous. It was the first Christmas in many years that had actually been filled with a pure joy that left Howie’s heart warm. Howie almost didn’t want it to end, but was quite thankful that the boys had left a few hours ago and Jillian was dozing peacefully. It had been quite a chore to soothe the infant into a night’s sleep, which seemed odd. But, Howie didn’t worry, still attributing to the abnormalities to extreme exhaustion. The whole family had fawned over Jillian that day. Howie figured he would be weary if he were fondled so much in one evening, too. Besides, she was still sleeping, so Howie was left to his thoughts which mostly revolved around Keveney those days. She seemed like such an intricate part of his life. He had loved the way her violet eyes sparked with his gift. And the kiss, oh the kiss had been joyous, leaving a permanent mark on his heart.

Sighing, Howie retrieved the new baby book to pass the time till he could sleep. Even though exhaustion gnawed at every single synapse of his brain, his body refused to slip into that mystifying, unconscious state. He was too caught within the excitement of Keveney’s kiss, continuing to pray that she thought of it too. Yawning softly, he flipped through the pages, carefully detailing every portion of Jillian’s life. It started by simply listing her family tree, which seemed easy enough. Though, Howie became quite stumped on her mother’s name. He wasn’t even sure how to work around that missing link within her life.

Not wanting to make himself sick with thought, Howie quickly turned to the Baby’s Firsts. He instantly smiled at that point, excited that he could actually fill in several of the infant’s firsts. Hurriedly writing all of Jillian’s accomplishments and how they occurred gave him such a large sense of pride, actually excited that he would be able to show Keveney his efforts.

Baby first lifted her head when…

“You lifted your head when you heard Kevie come in our house. She was asking for her Jillie Bean and you perked right up. It was the cutest thing I had ever seen. Keveney’s eyes lit like the moon itself that day,” Howie breathed, furiously writing down his thoughts before continuing to the next.

Baby first cooed when…

“You cooed when Daddy and Kevie were teasing each other with your bottle. You were sitting in your car seat, just watching us. I asked if the milk was too warm, Kevie told me to test it out. She squirted me, then I attacked, and you just cooed.”

Baby first laughed when…

“Oh, that gorgeous smile happened when Kevie sang you to sleep with me. You were cuddled in her arms while she was sitting in the rocking chair. Your beautiful emerald eyes sparkled happily as I stood beside you, just singing. Then Kevie started singing with me. Her voice was so gorgeous and you just smiled like you knew… When… Kevie…”

Howie leaned back in awe, glancing over his writing. Every single line held Keveney’s name. It was slightly amazing because it was true, Keveney had been involved in every single first in Jillian’s life. She had already been so intricately woven into the family package. Howie smiled thoughtfully, realizing that if he hadn’t troubled himself with thinking, Keveney’s name would have been written above the mother line.

“Now if I could only ask her out,” Howie lamented with a groan as a shrill cry erupted from the baby monitor. He instantly tightened with a cringe, realizing tonight would not be as peaceful as he had hoped. Quickly, he boosted himself from the bed and shuffled into the nursery. “Sad part is… My own daughter thinks I’m a pussy.”

Yet, Howie’s light and airy attitude shifted to a sheer state of panic when he reached Jillian’s crib. Everything seemed to scream an Emergency in his mind, causing the adrenaline to pour into his body and rush with an intense fever. The small infant was screaming hysterically with a fitful pain as her entire body broke into spasms. She wildly thrashed about as Howie tried to console her, heaving her into his arms. He noticed that she was soaked with a heavy sweat as her skin almost burnt through Howie’s cool flesh. He stepped back in absolute shock, numbed by her shrill screams of agony.

Jillian needed a doctor.

Chapter 13 – Communications By Heart

Keveney jerked from a deep sleep at the familiar twinkling of her phone. She snorted in surprise, lifting her heavy head from the pillow to glance at her clock. The large blue numbers indicated that it was early morning – far too early. She released a groan of protest, burying her face back into a pillow to will away the dreadful sound. Though, she was surprised that she had even heard the thing. Usually, she even had trouble hearing the piercing wails of her annoying alarm. Yet, the ringing persisted through her blurry thoughts, refusing to be silenced. Knowing she had lost the war, she fumbled to free a hand from beneath a thick pile of covers. Groping along her nightstand, she fought to locate the noisy phone. After several loud crashes of blurry objects, she finally located the phone. Mumbling still incoherent curses, she struggled to hold the phone correctly to her ear as she squeezed her eyes shut to avoid any declaration of consciousness.

“No more work—”

“Kevie?!” Howie’s voice interrupted with a painful stress.

“Howie?” Keveney responded, her body working with an icy fear from Howie’s voice. The tones released from just saying her nickname was enough to set her nerves ajar. Something wasn’t right. Every muscle within her body tightened and she felt as if the heavy blankets were suffocating her. Her skin prickled with several sharp tingles as her heart furiously pounded from beneath her ribcage, causing her rate of breaths to increase and beads of sweat to collect at her hairline. Lightheadedness swirled through her clouded mind, struggling to orient from her previous state of sleepiness.

“God, Kevie, I’m so sorry—”

“Don’t be sorry.”

“I shouldn’t have called, but, God!”

“What’s wrong?”

“Jillian — She’s sick — I have no idea what’s going on. She just got this really high fever all of a sudden and was screaming — I’m at the hospital and I don’t know what to do. They took her back and haven’t said a word to me—”

“What hospital?”

“Orlando Memorial—”

“Give me ten minutes,” Keveney declared, throwing the phone down without any considerations for a proper goodbye. She left no room for argument as she threw away the covers from her chilly body, hurdling herself out of the large bed. She stumbled across the length of the pitch-black bedroom, throwing on various articles of clothing from her open drawers and closet. She wasted no time locating the right color or texture. It didn’t matter what matched as long as she arrived without exposing any private portions of her body, bra, or briefs.

Besides, clothing didn’t matter as scenarios of her beloved Jillian thrashed against her aching skull as she tried to get ready. Her mind continued to repeat the facts of Pediatric Nursing, which would frighten even an uneducated layman. Jillian was a premature infant. And, even if she had been perfectly healthy at birth, she still was deprived of precious moments spent in the mother’s uterus gaining immunities and proper functioning of her systems. So, whatever ailment she suffered from, Jillian was at a more severe risk for complications. The idea of Jillian suffering because of an unfair disadvantage terrified Keveney. She could only hope that Jillian was receiving the best of care at Orlando Memorial while Howie simply sat in the waiting room. No answers to speak of.

Her heart ached for Howie at that moment, shifting her attention from the textbook horrors that played in her mind during her Neonatal rotations. She needed to be by his side for the time being. It seemed as if Howie had called no one else. He was waiting for her. They had grown so close in the passing months. Keveney was starting to believe that she held a special portion of his soul, because he held the most special portion of hers. She had to hurry.

“God, let them both be okay,” Keveney prayed softly, tripping from the threshold of her doorway. She cursed softly and kicked her door shut, preparing to give it a thrashing. But, the sharp opening of the opposite door drew Keveney’s attention. She gasped in shock as Stevie sprang from her quarters, swinging a thick baseball bat toward a wall. Keveney fell into her the doorway of her room, missing a firm connecting with the brunt force of the bat.

“Get on the ground, Scumbag! Or I’ll hammer your nuts so hard that they’ll spring out your nose and look like bleeding roses!” Stevie hollered in a sleep-induced state, raising the bat again for a might blow.

“Evie! It’s me, go back to bed! You freaking psycho!” Keveney called with a soft groan, holding her hands up as Stevie poked her in the chest with the bat. Stevie had been known to sleepwalk at certain stressful points. Yet, she also became utterly defensive in a half-awake state. Many nights Keveney’s boyfriends had almost been beaten to an inch of their life because they had roused Stevie. Keveney suddenly felt sorry for Stevie’s future husband who needed a late-night snack. She quickly made a mental note to locate a useful fertility clinic.

“Kevie?! What the Hell—”

“Howie called. Jillie’s Bean’s in the hospital.”

Stevie blinked, “Then why are you just standing there?”
*~*~*

Howie nervously thumped his foot upon the bleached tile floors, refusing to even glance at the clock for one more moment. He was convinced that the hands of the clock were moving backwards to purposely drive him insane. It felt as if he had been confined to the Emergency Waiting Room for a century. The harsh hospital chemicals assaulted his delicate senses to jar him from any calm state as his sleep deprived body screamed for rest. But, it was useless. The adrenaline of fear coursing throughout his body had wound him to the point of self-destruction. He just wanted his little girl in his arms on that lonely Christmas night.

Yet, as much as he longed for Jillian, terrifying memories would distract him from remembering Jillian in brighter moments. He recalled that Jillian’s body was blistering with a heavy fever, almost setting a fire to his hands as he buckled her into the car. She had screamed so fitfully in the car, causing tears to form in the depths of Howie’s dark eyes. She thrashed against the restraints, even holding her breath once or twice to startle him. But when they reached the hospital, she had fallen so silent and still. Howie thought she might be dead. His blood ran cold as he rushed her into the Emergency Department, turning her over to the physicians with several pleas to save his baby daughter. And, when the staff ripped her from his arms, he fell to pieces.

“Dear God, let her be okay. If your punishing me, please, Dear God, don’t take it out on her,” Howie lamented to himself, squeezing his eyes closed in prayer. He clasped his hands tightly as he hunched over in his seat, trying to make a ‘to do list’ to settle his nerves. Yet, nothing was coming to mind. He had left messages to the necessary family and friends, but insisted they stay home. With much reluctance, they actually agreed on the terms that he would call with any news. He accepted quickly, only wanting one person with him during the tragedy.

“Howie!”

Howie whipped his head in the direction of the melodious voice, immediately bolting away from the aching chair. It felt like a true Godsend as Keveney’s warm arms embraced him in a tight knit of comfort and love. He breathed with a bittersweet relief, embracing her softly as he nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck. He needed to be held and take care of as much as Jillian did at that moment. Having someone to finally lean upon did wonders for Howie’s aching heart. He actually released the softest sob as she rubbed his back, bringing him as close as possible.

“Oh, Kevie,” Howie groaned with agony.

“I’m so sorry, Howie. I got here as soon as I possibly could. If I had gone any faster, I would have sprouted wings. But I’m here now, okay? And I’m not going anywhere,” Keveney promised repeatedly, continuing to hold Howie while easing him back into the chairs. She knew they weren’t the most comfortable things, but she couldn’t risk letting Howie fall to the floor. Having Jillian in the hospital was bad enough. She didn’t need to be bouncing back and forth between two rooms.

“I’m just glad you’re here. Jillie Bean needs you,” Howie breathed raggedly, continuing to hold onto his companion. “I need you.”

“And I’m going to stay.”

“Thank you so much.”

“No need. I love you both. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” Keveney continued, allowing Howie to rest against her shoulder. She instantly traced her fingers through his soft curls in a soothing motion, watching his eyes drift closed. He had been waiting for centuries and looked utterly exhausted. Keveney didn’t blame him. She wanted him to rest, even for just a small moment. Besides, she knew it was agony to wait, but they had no choice. And, if possible, Keveney would do the waiting for him. “And I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else, either.”

Chapter 14 – Fleeting Sanity

Keveney released a heavy sigh, shifting slightly beneath Howie’s still body. She had hoped not to disturb him, but she could only manage to be so comfortable within their seated positions. Howie was simply leaning against her for support, practically curled within her embrace like a slumbering child. Yet, that was the furthest thought from her mind. The somnolent hours had already crawled into the deepest depths of the next evening, yet they still remained within the cramped quarters of the Emergency Department. Although, now they were able to at least sit with Jillian in her small section of room. She had rapidly been diagnosed with otitis media, an ear infection in layman terms as Howie had come to understood. But since she was only two months and had a high fever; the doctors wanted to hold her till the fever reduced. The better safe than sorry approach that Keveney always lived by.

“Is she going to be okay?”

Keveney jumped at the loud eruption into her thoughts, practically pushing Howie away from her embrace. She immediately glanced to see Howie acutely studying Jillian instead of dozing like she had originally thought. Her heart immediately pricked and she felt compassion for the drained father. It wasn’t easy to see one’s child vulnerable, especially when one could do absolutely nothing to change the situation. And Jillian truly looked helpless. She seemed to be absolutely exhausted from the raging sickness attacking her small form, so she remained sound asleep. She was quite pale, almost the color of the fairest porcelain doll, accept for the fiery tone of her flushed cheeks. She made not a single movement beneath the thin blankets. The only sign of life was the faint sounds of an occasional wheezing sigh. And for final creepy measures that startled Howie, an IV was inserted into her left hand, but splinted and covered to prevent it from slipping from the vein and into the tissues.

“Yeah, she’ll be okay now that you brought her in,” Keveney encouraged, rubbing his aching back as they sat by the hospital crib.

Howie shifted carefully, leaning forward to give Keveney more access to his back. Yet, he kept his gaze settled upon Jillian’s form nestled within the cold crib. He wanted to reach in and hold her, but feared hurting her. So he just stared, allowing his thoughts to flow free. “So, I didn’t jump the gun like a crazy first-time parent?”

“Nah, with babies this young, high fevers can really hurt them. It’s really good that you brought her—”

“Hurt them how?”

“Well…”

“I want the truth.”

“The can have a seizure—”

“Dear God—”

“Howie, she’s fine. Don’t even worry about what I said. I didn’t want to frighten you. But, you don’t even have to worry about it. The fever’s falling with the antipyretics flowing through her IV. She’s not in danger. I promise,” Keveney whispered with strength, wrapping her arms tightly around him from behind. She pressed several light kisses to the top of his head, willing him to hear her words and actually believe. Though, she could feel him tremble beneath her grip, proving his doubt.

“Did I cause her infection?” Howie pondered aloud, finally reaching through the crib’s railing with a sense of hope. He pressed his index finger into the palm of Jillian’s tiny hand, sighing when her fingers curled to grip. His heart ached as his eyes kept watch of the small infant.

His infant.

His daughter.

“No,” Keveney quickly replied, her tone warm and soothing. “Pre-term infants are known to be more susceptible to infection. And a baby’s Eustachian tubes are naturally shorter and straighter than ours, so fluid accumulates while she feeds. And—”

“I think I got everything before Preterm,” Howie murmured, wrinkling his nose as he turned to bring his gaze to hers. For a moment, his mind was turned away from the plaguing situation before him.

“You got a ‘no?’”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“But it’s simple Anatomy and Physiology—”

“Simple?” Howie snorted, shaking his head in disagreement.

“And you call me the smartass?” Keveney inquired, actually moving a smile to his face. And his sweet smile naturally caused Keveney to laugh. “You’re welcome, Dorough.”

“I know—”

But their bliss was shortly interrupted when the curtain blocking off their privacy was ripped open. Keveney leapt back in shock, uncoiling her arms from around Howie’s neck. Her heart thudded wildly from within her chest, causing her pulse to increase and a cool sweat to bubble against her hairline. She straightened uncomfortably as a woman dressed in white hurried in. She immediately bent over the small child, glancing between Howie and Keveney with a coy smile. She was the nurse attending to Jillian. “Oh! Daddy and Mommy must have heard the good news!”

“Good news?” Howie repeated with a raised brow.

“Yes, we’re being discharged!”

*~*~*

“You finally settled?” Keveney questioned, watching Howie retreat down the stairs with heavy fallings of each foot. It looked to be just a great deal of energy for him to merely bend his leg to lift it higher. Instead, he scurried almost like a zombie with taunt muscles craving for breaths of oxygen. Meanwhile, he had laid Jillian to bed after Keveney dropped them off at the Dorough household. She had naturally worried about Howie driving after Jillian was discharged, so she insisted that she would drop them off. Then tomorrow Keveney would drive with him to pick his car up, which seemed natural enough. Besides, he looked overly exhausted and Keveney cared too much for his welfare. She would do anything in the world for Howie.

“I think… She’s sleeping and probably will be out for awhile,” Howie answered, stifling his own large yawn. Frankly, he was utterly thankful for Jillian’s sleepiness, because he was drained of any extra energy. He could barely lift his legs to move let alone concentrate on caring for a still sick infant. And to assure that she would stay sleeping and his own sleep would run without complications, he had made all the necessary phone calls in the car.

“Good,” Keveney sighed, reaching for her keys.

“You’re leaving?” Howie murmured, slightly horrified.

“Yes—”

“But… No!”

“No?”

“No! You need to stay for coffee—”

“You don’t need anymore stimulants, Babe.”

“Look, I just don’t want you driving,” Howie continued to protest, folding his arms across his chest. He looked quite defiant at that very moment, but he was more concerned about his friend. Keveney looked as if she might collapse. She too had been drained by waiting at the Emergency Room. She cared for Jillian as if she were her mother, which made her overly anxious about the entire situation. It was obvious that her adrenaline was finally crashing, leaving her mangled in its path. “You look beat. C’mon, just crash here. It’s not like I’m asking you to donate your blood to keep the vampire in my basement alive. I’m just asking you to spend the night. I’ve got plenty of space. I owe you that much, Kevie.”

“Yeah, you do,” she teased, obviously complying without much force. She carefully slipped past Howie, hurrying up the stairs in search of refuge. “But I want the master bedroom!”

“But… Hey! That’s my bed!” Howie blurted, the statement finally connecting into the cognitive portion of his brain. He immediately hurried to catch up to the woman, but he was too late. Reaching his room; he found his mouth instantly drying like a blistering desert. Keveney was already curled in his bed, stripped to her tank top and boxers with the other garments lying upon his floor. She was nestled against his favorite pillow, covered by the sweet softness of his comforter and silky sheets. Her golden tresses curled amongst the pillow like a golden halo within the soft lighting of the bedroom, enhancing the beauty of her light violet eyes. Howie couldn’t imagine a sweeter sight.

“And I never said I was kicking you out.”

“But—”

Keveney propped herself up within the bed, catching Howie’s apprehensions. She smiled sweetly, patting the opposite portion of the bed. “Howie, we’re best friends and we’re adults. Don’t make this weird, because it isn’t. We know that we’re friends and aren’t expecting anything. Besides, the baby monitor is in here. So, if she wakes up, whoever hears her, grabs her. Deal?”

“Sounds good…” Howie trailed, unable to voice the truth of the situation. He licked his drying lips, carefully inching himself underneath the covers. He made sure not to touch a single portion of her body, merely laying flat on his back to stare at the ceiling. He had actually dreamed of her slipping into his bed during the loneliest of nights when the covers had turned cold against his skin. Yet, it wasn’t under this context. His dream consisted of the rawest of passion swirling around them in a lust arousing state of enchantment. The candles flickering against her creamy caramel skin, accenting the beats of sweat outlining her womanly contours. And, finally, the thick heat of the room would drive the deepest passion and heat between them to consummate the greatest relationship that Howie couldn’t even begin to dream of.

Yet, there they lay - merely bound by friendship.

“Howie?” Keveney murmured, drawing him away from his thoughts as she shifted. The soft mattress shifted beneath him and suddenly he felt a warm mass curving against him. His heart fluttered as he turned his head to find her actually beside him. His eyes hadn’t deceived him. She was curled to his side, cuddled beneath the blankets with their bodies melting together in some sort of beloved harmony that neither could even begin to understand.

“Yeah?”

“You got quiet.”

“Oh, I was just thinking.”

“About?”

“How perfect this moment is. Jillie is safe and sound. And I’m cuddling my best friend.”

“You’re so sweet.”

“Funny, you took the words right out of my mouth.”

Chapter 15 – Almost Perfect

“D, what the Hell are you doing here?” AJ openly groaned, startling the rest of the group from their folders of information. Immediately, four faces tilted upward, watching Howie hurry into the large conference room with blank stares. They hadn’t expected Howie to show for the meeting because of the recent night’s events. Yet there he was, but the boys weren’t pleased like he had expected. Howie still looked exhausted from the dreadful night at the hospital with Jillian. His dark chocolate eyes were heavy with dark bags mooning beneath his bottom eyelids, complimenting the frazzled state of his usually perfected curls. He looked like death warmed over, which seemed to be a far-stretching compliment for his state. Though, Kevin looked the most dissatisfied with his appearance, feeling the group didn’t need any hindrances in Howie’s health to set them back.

“I’m here for the meeting,” Howie replied quizzically, pouring a fresh cup of coffee from the nearby station of continental breakfast assortments. He stifled a yawn within the process, scurrying to his place at the large oak table and reaching for his own thick folder. He had slept peacefully with Keveney curled to his side and didn’t understand the others distress. The sweet smell of lavender had soothed him to peace as he inhaled her freshly washed curls that had managed to fan upon his chest. So, when Kevin had called to startle him from his sleep, he was struck with a fresh idea of brilliance. So, as much as he wanted to stay rounded beside Keveney; he had to attend the meeting for better purposes.

“When we called, we said to stay home,” Brian reminded.

“Are you dyslexic when it comes to listening?” AJ mused, adding his two cents.

“And you should be home with Jillian,” Kevin scorned.

“It’s okay, Kevin. Jillie’s home with Keveney. She spent the night with us—”

“You spend the night alone with Keveney then drop the kid on her as a parting gift? Damn, D, that’s a little too cold for my tastes,” Nick murmured.

“I didn’t—”

“More importantly, you actually left the house after you spend the night with her! Where exactly did we go wrong?!” AJ moaned, pretending to sob outright with the fury of a parent who believed he had corrupted his son.

“Shut up, AJ,” Brian laughed, adding some sugar to his coffee, though it looked more like he had dumped the entire bowl into the black liquid.

“No way, not while the getting’s good! Did she sleep in the guest room? Or were you two just a little more…cozy…?” AJ immediately continued, leaning forward onto the table with his elbows propped upward to hold his face within the palms of his hands. His dark sunglasses slipped down the bridge of his nose, showing the lights dancing across his dark eyes. AJ always became acutely alert whenever any form of sexual interaction was announced

“It’s none of your—”

“That means a big old ‘no’ on the guest room!” AJ smirked with pure triumph.

“Which means she was in his bed!” Nick laughed.

“Which means he had an ample opportunity to—”

“This is not an episode of C.S.I., dimwits,” Brian groaned, “What happened is totally Howie’s business, even though I don’t think he should have been engaging in such...activities when he was so tired… Might give Keveney the wrong idea…”

“Nothing happened!” Howie objected. “Like that was on my mind with a sick kid in the house!”

“But you admit it’s been on your mind?” AJ squealed.

“Look, can I just talk about Kevie going on tour like I wanted?!”

*~*~*

Keveney released a soft groan as the internal clock of her body’s programmed sleeping time was abruptly alarmed, arousing her from the darkness of a perfect sleep. She popped her eyes open, blinking several times as her eyes slowly adjusted to the surroundings along with her body. She lay perfectly still, inhaling the soft aroma of Howie’s sweet musky cologne from the pillow softly nestling her head with support. Then, without warning, an alarm sounded within her brain practically screaming her eldest sister’s name.
Grimacing, she rolled onto her side, finally deciding to reach for the cordless phone on Howie’s bedside. She knew she would have Hell to pay whenever Stevie picked up the apartment’s phone. But, Keveney wasn’t dreading it like she normally did. Instead, she could only withdraw into the sweetest memories of last night while punching the familiar keys. She distinctly remembered Howie awakening earlier that morning with a snort that turned to the cutest growl. Usually, Keveney wouldn’t even awaken for a deadly hurricane. Yet, the sweet tones of Howie’s voice stirred her for a moment while he spoke upon the phone. Then she heard the soft click of the phone disconnecting and a shift upon the mattress. Briefly, he whispered something about a band meeting. And she remembered the faintest brush of the sweetest lips against hers…

But was that just an illusion?

“Hello? Hello? Hello?! Look, pervert, I’m half a step away from Star 69’ing your ass—”

“Evie, woah—”

“Keveney Marie?!”

“The one and—”

“You’re—”

“Grounded, I know.”

“I hope you also know how worried I was. You’ve been gone for almost two days. But do you call? No! Instead, you have me pacing around this entire house! I wore a freaking line in the living room! An honest to God line! And you know I have important interviews this week! It’s imperative that I look well rested and down-right gorgeous—”

“Are you joining Mom’s guilt-trip package or what?” Keveney interrupted with a thick groan, startling Stevie into a brief silence. She rolled her eyes, peeling the covers back from her body. She hadn’t wanted to get into this kind of conversation this early in the morning, but it was happening nonetheless. So, she stretched for a moment before padding over to the nursery to check upon Jillian. “And I’m sorry about not calling, okay?”

“Better, now where are you?”

“I stayed with Howie and Jillie Bean.”

“How is she?”

“Better – it was an ear infection.”

“Poor Baby!”

“Yeah…” Keveney sighed, gently creeping into the nursery. She prayed for a significant improvement in the child’s appearance, because she couldn’t stand the heartache. The infant had given both Howie and Keveney a frightful scare the previous day. And Keveney was so anxious to see the child that she hurried quick goodbyes when she peered into the warm crib. And thankfully, Jillian was awake and simply peering at the ceiling while gurgling softly to herself. Her cheeks were still flushed with a slight fever, but she had regained her creamy-peach complexion. And no miserable wails erupted from her slowly rising chest. She was simply tranquil, chewing upon her fingers while continuing to chatter.

“Well, good morning, Jillian Luz!” Keveney greeted warmly, unable to hide her exuberant pride in Jillian’s health. She leaned over the crib and offered several high pitched coos to alert the infant’s attention. Jillian emitted a lazy smile with a soft grunt, kicking her legs out with an excited approval. Keveney’s body immediately warmed over, scooping the child up. She cradled Jillian close, kissing her forehead. “It’s great to see that smile, Baby Girl. And you’re not as warm as before. Daddy’s going to be so happy—”

“To be the first to see the two most beautiful women this morning? Oh yes!” Howie enthused, popping into the room without warning. He dropped everything in his hands, grasping Keveney’s shoulders as he pressed a kiss to her cheek before kissing Jillian’s flailing hands. He then allowed Jillian to grasp his index finger, nibbling upon it with her toothless mouth. “How is she?”

“Much better! The fever’s down.”

“Thank God,” Howie breathed, watching Jillian smile with the softest yawn after releasing his finger. He leaned over Keveney’s shoulder to press the gentlest kiss to Jillian’s cooling brow. “You’re not very funny, Jillian Luz. I was very scared last night. But, I know that you like to tease me. But I think you’re learning too much from Kevie.”

“Oh, thanks, Howie!” Keveney scoffed with a soft laugh.

“You know it’s true!”

“So?” Keveney tempted, puffing out her chest as if challenging him to a fight. But, he simply poked her in the chest and the air deflated from her lungs with a soft 'pfft.'

“Keveney,” Howie laughed. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Chapter 16 – Unbelievable Offer

Stevie bounced to the darker beats of her Evanescence CD while furiously stirring the steaming pot that was boiling upon her stove. She had been working the entire evening to prepare a feast for her little sister, mostly because it was a tradition for Friday nights, but also as a thank you. Stevie couldn’t have been more grateful for Keveney forming such a deep friendship with Howie. As much as Stevie approved of Keveney finally finding a stable man, she also realized how extremely wonderful it would be for her own career. She had already confessed her wicked thought to Keveney, only to have the little Moore laugh in a funny amusement. So, Stevie had laughed, too, knowing that Keveney understood it was so much more than a boost to her career. Stevie’s many-layered personality was like a favorite childhood story for Keveney.

Like the fact that, despite her formal appearance within the office, Stevie held a flare for an extremely fashionable attitude with just a faint spice of what the fashion industry coined “punk.” It was quite the mixture for a woman who presented a cool and collected appearance within the office, but when she returned home she ventured back into her extreme comfort zone. She still remained neat and quite feminine, but done so with a pair of black hot pants trimmed in a hot pink with a matching hot pink tank scripted with a vulgar saying. She looked as if she could pop from the latest fashion magazine, but instead she stood over a stove till the phone rang.

Then, sheer frustration took over her as she flung the spoon across the stove. It clattered loudly against the music, but she didn’t seem to care. She had moments of just an abrupt snapping, which followed with a quick cooling. Keveney often described the eldest Moore as a mini-volcano. She could completely blow within one moment, only to dull and pacify in several seconds after the initial quake. Unfortunately, she anticipated another cancellation from Keveney as she yanked the phone from its place and to her ear. Immediately, the fire sparked and the words exploded like a rush of molten lava. “Keveney Marie Moore! So help me God, you’re dead if you tell me you added another shift like some lap dog for those dinosaurs they call nurses—”

“Is it illegal to pocket a little extra cash after the holidays?” Howie laughed.

“Oh! Howie!” Stevie gasped in horror, practically dropping the phone into the boiling pot. Only, somehow, she managed to recover, cursing softly at the heat brushing against her wrists. She yanked backward, shifting the phone to hear Howie’s voice. She felt so foolish at that moment.

“Hey, Stevie. I’m guessing that Kevie isn’t home?”

“Quite clever,” Stevie humored, rolling her eyes though Howie couldn’t see the gesture. So, quickly realizing that she only had to focus on her speech, she moved back to the pasta. She grasped the assaulted spoon, dunking it back into the boiling liquid. She wanted to make sure it didn’t stick to the bottom like Keveney tended to do when she became scatterbrained with various thoughts popping into her memory like bubbles. “But, no, she’s at work… Well, she should be on her way home, but she usually gets caught up with a patient. Or other nurses corner her to do their duties, damn decrepit dinosaurs! Doesn’t matter that I’m slaving over a blistering—”

“Should I call back later?” Howie interrupted with a nervous laugh. He already realized that Keveney tended to push her sister’s fury buttons more than any one person should, knowing that her impish playfulness could be deadly for someone who didn’t understand Stevie’s natures. Someone like himself.

“Huh? Oh! I’m sorry, Howie. That girl just drives me nuts.”

“I can tell.”

“So, how’s Jillian?” Stevie questioned, making her tone light and airy.

“Better. The antibiotic did wonders. She’s almost at a full recovery, thanks to Kevie playing Mommy Dorough…” Howie’s voice trailed at the thought of Keveney playing the title of his wife. He felt his heart warm, but quickly realized that he was speaking to her sister instead of her. So, quickly, he struggled to change the subject. “Um… But, I got the final copy of your article today!”

“Oh?”

“It’s absolutely beautiful.”

“Thanks! You really approve?”

“Of course. You have quite a way with words, even if it’s just a simple article. You have a way of putting a positive spin on almost anything you get your hands on. Us artists really appreciate that tone of voice. You know? Too many people are just ready to kick us in the balls as AJ always says. They like to find our flaws and exploit them. Like with Jillian, you could have completely destroyed me. But, you handled it extremely diplomatically. I thank you so much for that. And I think I’ll have you do all our interviews—”

“Seriously?!”

“Would you want to?”

“Are you seriously asking me that question?!”

“Do you really question my authenticity?”

“Howie!” Stevie groaned with annoyance, spinning herself within the cord of the phone. “My answer is yes, okay? I would love to do all your interviews!”

“Then I’ll talk to our publicist about making it happen.”

“Oh God! I owe you one!”

“Good, I want to cash in that one…”

*~*~*

Keveney cursed openly as she fumbled for her car keys while killing the engine, feeling as if she were trapped within a numbed body. She was struggling to function properly, the panic attack dulling her reflexes from being elevated far too long. A fine film of sweat coated her skin as she tumbled out of her car after releasing the sticky keys from their port. She hit the asphalt with a sharp smack, only to roll into a standing position like a cat that could never land on her back. Her heart thudded heavily against her chest while racing to the Dorough home, anxious to find and alleviate the problem. Stevie had terrified her when she arrived home, rushing out of the house screaming hysterically. Never had Keveney saw her sister so overwhelmed with distress, unless she counted the one moment when Keveney had tied all of Stevie’s expensive bras together to create a rope-pull for the hospital fair. But, needless to say, a sly story of Howie’s hysteria had unfolded from Stevie’s lips as she shook Keveney furiously to add the affect of terror. The eldest Moore had claimed he was dripping with anxious energy, begging for Keveney to rescue him from some unknown disaster.

So, she naturally feared the worst.

“Howie?! Jillie Bean?! Howie? Where are you?!” Keveney hollered, bursting into the home. She started her search within the downstairs. Her heart continued to hammer dramatically within her aching chest, causing her to inhale and exhale the sharpest breaths in the shortest amount of time. She started to feel lightheaded from the lack of oxygen, but persisted in her pursuit. Her hands trembled with a nervous flurry, knotting the hem of her shirt. She didn’t know what to expect. “Howie—”

Keveney’s breath caught deep within her throat as she entered the kitchen. The rest of her sentence erupted like a jumbled mass of vowels, staring at the invitation in front of her upon the kitchen table. A simple cream-colored envelope had been propped upon the table with a single coral rose sitting within a matching vase. White, vanilla candles flickered softly within the lighting, causing her eyes to shimmer with fascination at the burning dance. Upon the envelope was her name scrawled with a delicate writing, which drew her closer that before. Slowly, she reached to withdraw the rose from its case, inhaling the sweet scent. She closed her eyes for the longest moment, drawing her fingers along the edges of the envelope before flipping it open. Then, she withdrew the elegant note card trimmed in silver.

Sorry to give you such a terrible scare, Sweetheart. But, we need to ask you something that may change our lives.
Love, Jillie Bean and Howie

Gently, Keveney settled the note card and the envelope back onto the tablecloth. Her mind immediately traveled in several different directions, wondering what Howie could have possibly meant with his carefully crafted words. She pressed the soft petals to her nose for the sweet scent, hearing the cute laughter of Jillian. So, she turned in excitement to find Howie and Jillian in the threshold of the kitchen. Her violet eyes twinkled with surprise, moving to kiss Jillian’s cheek and then Howie’s cheek, though she kissed close to his mouth. She withdrew and a rosy blush complimented her beautiful face, but her curious mind prevailed.

“So, what’s changing our lives?” Keveney questioned with curiosity, bouncing slightly upon the balls of her feet with a childlike exuberance.

“Honestly?” he teased, gently shifting Jillian so he could reach to tuck a stray lock behind Keveney’s ear. He watched her mouth a simple ‘thank you,’ causing his entire body to flutter with excitement. He felt his mouth start to dry as his heart began to pound with anticipation, realizing he was moments away from crafting their binding destinies. He considered this the most important event in his entire life, besides finding Jillian, only because he was falling in love. Truly falling in love.

“I would hope so, Goofball,” Keveney giggled softly, unable to realize the potential.

“Okay,” Howie laughed softly, realizing it might be beneficial just to reach the direct point. “We developed a great friendship, Kevie. A friendship that I can’t imagine never finding. You’re very special to Jillie and me. Only, as important as you are to my life… My career is also a major priority. Music has always been my life and we’re going back on tour in two months. I can’t abandon the boys, but Jillie can’t live without you that long… And I can’t live without you for that long…”

“What—”

“I want you to go on tour with us. Just think of the possibilities before you say no, okay? You can have this great vacation on my expense. We’re going all across the states and you had said before that you were dying to see different places before you settled into a routine. I just need help with Jillian. And I can’t stand the thought of leaving my best friend behind. You mean so much to me, Kevie. Do you understand? The guys agree to compensate you since you’re going on hiatus from work. And we want you to bring a companion so you’re not forced to just commune with us for those months. Just don’t say no to me. Please?”

“No?” Keveney laughed, immediately moving to embrace both him and Jillian with a flurry of kiss. She felt Howie initially tense with surprise, obviously not expecting the reaction. But, it only seemed to make Keveney laugh harder, drawing the small family closer within her arms. “You honestly think I’d say no?! Well, okay, I’ll say no! I’ll say no freaking way would I miss this!”

Chapter 17 – Hidden Infatuation

“Howie gave you two months notice about this tour. Yet, here you are, half an hour before leaving, and still stuffing your luggage—”

“Evie! Why should you expect anything different from me?” Keveney grunted, staring at her bulging suitcase with annoyance. Howie was due to arrive at any moment and she was still wrestling with her large piles of luggage, clothing, and necessary items for the tour. Keveney had always been a procrastinator when it came to packing for trips. She usually brushed off the massive task till the midnight before leaving. And, nothing had changed in twenty-one years of life. At midnight, the previous night, Keveney’s room exploded with a fury of packing, even if the largest portion of the packing had been stuffing wrinkled clothes into various compartments.

Besides, packing kept Keveney’s mind focused for the most of the evening. She hadn’t exactly had a good night’s sleep in two months, because when she drifted, she tumbled into endless possibilities for this extended tour with a man she had come to truly cherished. She never had felt this way about a man before. Howie was the first to evoke such passion into her wildly impish streaks of nature. The two months of waiting had been filled with romantic hopes as to why Howie truly wanted her on tour. But, her cynical nature about love and relationships always seemed to pop the dreams when she recalled Jillian. She was just a babysitter for the infant while Howie was busying wrestling with the fans. It was silly to think that he would be interested in her.

“Keveney! Hello! What’s the use of scolding you when you have the attention span of a goldfish—”

“Shh!” Keveney halted, crouching down on all fours just to the side of her large bed. She cocked her head to the side like a curious feline ready to pounce, studying the open suitcase with a keen sense of stealth. Slowly, her tongue poked from the corner of her mouth with concentration as she pressed her body low to the ground. Then, without warning, she sprang to her bed with a growl of determination. She tackled the suitcase in hopes to close it, but miscalculated. With a grunt of surprise, she rolled off the bed, causing the suitcase to topple over her, spilling the contents of her hard work. “The Keveney Curse of Packing remains thwarted!”

“You’re hopeless, Keveney Marie!” Stevie snorted with laughter, watching her sister pop up from the small crevice between the bed and wall. She was already immune to her sister’s quirky natures, but not too immune to laugh with hysterics. And she seemed to only laugh harder when she noticed the bright purple bikini briefs hanging from Keveney’s right ear like a gaudy earring that their deceased grandmother would wear.

“It was purely the suitcase’s fault!” Keveney huffed, throwing her underwear at her older sister in attempts to silence her giggles. Usually, Keveney would provoke the situation to make her sister laugh, but now it seemed too petty. She was honestly frightened about this tour, overtaking her sister’s serious personality for that moment. “Don’t make me rue the day I invited you along on tour, Evie”

“Rue the day? Are we backing into the Renaissance, Little One?” Stevie mused, tossing the underwear back to the bed.

“Excuse me?” Keveney countered, not expecting such a quip from Stevie.

“Excuse me? Did the blonde hair dye seep into that big brain of yours?” Stevie mimicked sarcastically.

“Damnit, you know I’m a natural bl—” Keveney snorted in surprise, “Did we switch brains? Because usually I play the annoying sister!”

“True, but you’re a bundle of nerves right now. So, I decided to lighten the situation.”

“Oh, really?” Keveney grunted, heaving the empty suitcase back to the bed. She tried to act unfazed by Stevie’s declaration in hopes to ward her off, but Stevie was a reporter. So, Stevie was nosier than the average older sister. Sighing with defeat, Keveney then dove back to the floor, hurdling her clothing to the bed. “How so?”

“Because of a certain man—

“Who? Ben or Jerry?” Keveney quipped, popping back up into sight. She noticed the familiar glint in her sister’s old gray eyes, causing her to snort with annoyance. Some things never changed within the structure of a family. Stevie always loved to play mother.

“Stop playing dumb. I’m talking about a man that gave you a coral rose and invited you on tour. Do you know that the color of that rose means desire?” Stevie scolded, sitting down on the messy bed. She noticed all of the familiar symptoms in Keveney. The goofy smile, glimmering violet eyes, constant humming, and, the tell-tale signature of infatuation in Keveney, running clumsily into walls after even mentioning Howie’s name sent flare-like signals into Stevie’s brain. Still, Keveney played coy with her emotions, afraid of becoming attached to another person. Being abandoned as an infant had profoundly disrupted Keveney’s social relationships, even if she had a loving adopt family. The Moore’s loved Keveney as if she were actually born from Mrs. Moore’s womb, but that didn’t erase the damage that Keveney’s birth-mother caused. Keveney would always wonder why she was thrown onto a deserted street and left to die by the woman that was supposed to love her unconditionally. And Stevie found it frustrating, watching Keveney miss so many opportunities for love.

“What’s dumb? Any man that can make a profit of an ice cream named Chunky Monkey deserves my bundle of nerves—”

“Kevie—”

“Doorbell!” Keveney chirped, hearing the distinctive twinkle of their door much to her relief.

“Quite the intelligent Chunky Monkey—”

“Just go get the door, butt-munch,” Keveney demanded, hurriedly balling the clothing to stuff into the suitcase. She didn’t want Howie to think she was stalling to leave, nor did she want to get left behind. She was halfway through thinking that she didn’t have time for Stevie’s quips when she shuddered violently.

“What’s the matter?” Stevie questioned with skepticism.

“I just imagined that I was you for one horrifying moment.”

*~*~*

“So, who did she invite again?” Brian called, watching Howie practically leap from the back of the limo. Howie hadn’t even waited for the limo to fully stop before he flung the door open to race up the stairs, making Brian’s heart stop for just a moment. Brian had never seen Howie so exuberant before, but he quickly reminded himself of the source – Keveney. Howie had keenly laid a plan to invite Keveney on tour as a “nanny” in front of the boys during their initial meeting two months ago. But, Brian knew better than to assume Howie wanted her strictly for the care of Jillian. The tour lasted for six months, which meant Howie would have Keveney all to himself for six long months. Or so he thought, Brian mused with a delighted half-grin. Keveney was a very beautiful woman, which meant that it was every Backstreet Boy for himself. Of course they knew not to step onto Howie’s marked territory of romantic interest, but the boys were truly bastards to one another after several years of friendship. They had no qualms about exploring the options and pushing the envelope till Howie exploded with his true feelings.

“She invited Stevie,” Howie answered absentmindedly, hopping up the steps to the quaint home. He had spent many nights over at this home, curled beside Keveney watching a movie while Jillian slumbered in her playpen. He also recalled many fond dinners with both sisters after Stevie’s nagging for Keveney to invite Howie over. It all seemed worth it in the end, knowing how close he was to getting Keveney alone. He flexed his index finger, hurriedly depressing the doorbell in attempts to stir the girls into a faster pace.

“Stevie?” Brian murmured with surprise. “I thought you said she was single—”

“She is.”

“Then why is she bringing some dude—”

“Hey, Howie!” a sultry voice interrupted, causing Brian to hush in awe. He blanked in surprise as Howie enveloped the dark beauty with a friendly squeeze. Brian just stared for the longest moment, unable to recall a lovelier image. This mystery woman was a few inches shy of his height and exploding with personality as she wrapped Howie into a delighted conversation about her “insane” sister. Her short locks were spiked with a messy precision, red highlights catching against the golden sun. Her warm gray eyes crinkled beneath her sophisticated glasses with the affectionate smile she offered at Howie. Her outrageous figure wrapped in tight black jean shorts and a white, ribbed tank top reading “Rockstar Groupie” in glitter. Brian was floored.

“Hey, Stevie,” Howie enthused, extremely aware of Brian’s foolish expression. After getting to know Stevie over the course of two months, Howie anticipated Brian’s very reaction. He had already guessed that Brian and Stevie would connect deeply during the trip, giving Howie yet another opportunity to prove himself to Keveney. Diversions were always key.

“That’s Stevie?!” Brian wheezed.

“Yeah, Stevanie Moore, Keveney’s sister,” Howie introduced as Brian stepped inside. He then glanced to Stevie who seemed petrified with sheer delight, complimenting Brian’s dumbfounded state. “Stevie, I’m sure you already know Brian.”

“Yeah…” Stevie trailed, licking her dying lips. When Stevie’s magazine had started following the group’s career, she had been instantly drawn to one member. His light blue eyes, squared jaw, dark blonde curls, sleekly toned body, and the ball of energy that represented his kind personality warmed the depths of her soul. That’s why her coworkers gave her the heart shaped frame of him in a pair of boxers that had accidentally started slipping from his hips. The paper had paid for the photograph from one of the leading paparazzi journalists, but only for the purpose of teasing their best interviewer. And she couldn’t believe he was actually at her doorstep. “Hi…”

“Hey, it’s nice to meet you,” Brian greeted.

“Yeah…” Stevie murmured, every other word melting from her brain.

“Hey, Stevie, where’s Kevie?” Howie questioned, glancing around the apartment as the conversation seemed to drop between Brian and Stevie. If anything, the nonverbal cues were bouncing across the room in a smoldering heat that made words useless. But, Howie was all too anxious to really care about breaking the moment. He wanted to find Keveney and get going.

“Yeah…”

“Huh—”

“Right here!” Keveney announced, dragging the suitcase from the hallway. She grunted with annoyance, stumbling back as the suitcase toppled to its side. She went to kick it with a string of valuable curses, but heard Howie chuckle with admiration. She whirled to catch the look of amusement upon his handsome face. She tensed with frustration, arching her light brows toward him. “What?”

“Duct tape?” Howie questioned, pointing to the suitcase layered in several rounds of sticky, strong, gray tape.

“It wouldn’t shut!” Keveney pouted innocently.

“Makes sense,” Howie laughed, drawing her close for a hug. He inhaled the soft scent of her J-Lo perfume, sighing with delight as he made a mental image of this moment. He remembered Keveney rambling off a fact that smells were the closest sense associated with memory. He still couldn’t believe she was going on his six month tour. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah, where’s Jillie Bean?”

“With Kevin loading the buses.

“Making her a grunt worker when she’s not even half a year old?”

“Technically, she is half a year. She is six months old.”

“Not until the twenty-forth of this month.”

“Like I said, technicalities. Besides, Kev wants to build up her muscles. I said no to the steroids though. I don’t like those over-muscled women that tend to look like Vin Diesel in a skirt.”

“Oh, Lord,” Keveney laughed, pulling from Howie’s embrace. She wanted to comment about him being her favorite actor, but noticed a possessive look within his dark eyes. It was almost as if he were waiting for her to make some sly remark about the handsome actor, which would invariably damage his pride. So, she glanced around and brightened when she noticed Brian admiring her sister. She had briefly recalled Howie stating what a handsome couple Brian and Stevie would make. And, anything that dragged Stevie from breathing down Keveney’s throat was a welcomed diversion. With Brian around, Keveney was free to cause chaos. “Hey, Brian.”

“Hey, Kevie,” Brian murmured, his eyes never leaving Stevie’s form.

“Let’s get going,” Howie chuckled, kissing her cheek as a look of offence melted to her beautiful features.

“Okay, let me get—”

“The driver’s got the luggage.”

“Oh…” Keveney trailed with an impish smile. “I could get used to that.”

“I figured,” Howie mused, guiding her to the door.

“Wait!” Keveney blurted, turning back to Brian and Stevie. She quickly whistled loudly for her sister’s attention, tossing the infamous heart shaped frame. She had stolen the frame from her sister’s underwear drawer for this very purpose – when Stevie had first been introduced to Brian. “Figured since you packed your king-sized vibrator, you’d also need your favorite picture for imagery of the pumping python of love.”

Stevie’s heart stopped as she caught the frame, feeling Brian glance over her shoulder. She winced when he gasped in surprise at his image within the romantic frame. He caught her gray eyes and smirked. “Quite the handsome guy, huh?”

Stevie burned with humiliation, ‘”KEVENEY MARIE!!!”

Chapter 18 – A Chance Flirtation

“Why did you take the Puke Machine from Kev? Damn, J! He was perfectly fine with the brat! And we were just fine without her!” Nick lamented when AJ approached with Jillian. He had been complaining even before AJ had approached, but now his revulsion over the situation seemed to project three-fold onto the baby girl. He was the only man still slightly unnerved by the infant, despite his four younger siblings. However, Jillian was still a preemie in his eyes, which made her more susceptible to many terrifying childhood illnesses. Nick feared that if he were with Jillian that somehow she would have a terrifying attack and die on him. The overwhelming guilt of her death would just eat away at his tender soul, not to mention Howie’s devastation. And, if it wasn’t the fear of her falling ill, it was the significant change of his status. Jillian was like a daughter to the entire group, which made him a father-figure. He wasn’t ready to be a father.

“Because this little chick is a babe magnet!” AJ confided with a wicked smile, kissing Jillian’s warm cheek. The little girl giggled with approval, offering AJ her plastic key ring that she had been nibbling upon. AJ took the non-slobbered side into his mouth, wiggling it to gather Jillian’s attention, allowing her to seize it back into her mouth with a grin. The shell-shocked man begging for the newborn to stop screaming at the baby store was just a distant memory catalogued into the files of the boys’ friendship. Now, AJ was completely relaxed with the gurgling infant gently folded into his inked arms. Though, not everything was humbling about his fatherhood, because the wickedness of his lustful youth remained, infant or not.

“Babe magnet?” Nick scoffed with disgust. “What? I’m a famous singer who’s bank account triples your entire tuition through any Ivy League College just really isn’t heating up the women anymore?!”

“It leaves something to be desired,” AJ mused, glancing to notice a woman walking down the sidewalk just in front of them. They had been helping load the buses for the tour, although it had just been them settling their personal items into their private tour buses. Like many stars, Nick and AJ bowed out of lugging heavy electronic equipment into the various vans. That’s what the road crew was for, though Kevin blamed their insolence on their feminine qualities. Not that it bothered AJ, as long as he didn’t break a nail. So, they left Kevin to await the arrival of Howie and Brian, but the woman was side-tracking AJ.

“What could it possibly be missing, J?! Scoring left and right in the front of your latest and most expensive vehicle—”

“They won’t go for McDonald’s afterwards, because they know I’ve got the load of cash in my pocket. But, if they see a happy Daddy just taking his baby girl out for a walk… McDonald’s is so in the budget! Now, just watch and learn,” AJ murmured, kissing Jillian’s forehead for a burst of luck. The child immediately giggled, catching the woman’s attention. AJ grinned wickedly, noticing the woman offer a sweet smile to the pair. “Excuse me, m’am. I’m sorry to bother you, but my little girl insisted that I had to speak to one of the most beautiful women that she’s ever seen.”

“Oh, really? Your little girl?” the woman asked, pulling her prescription sunglasses from her face to reveal the most dazzling gray eyes. Her cropped brunette locks fell just above her eyes, accentuating the mysterious and gorgeous profile of her face. Her painted lips curved into an unruly smile as she reached to smack a gently kiss on Jillian’s small fingers.

“Yes, my little girl,” AJ replied with sincerity, feeling Jillian squirm in his arms. He glanced down to see Jillian hold her arms out to the gorgeous woman. She wrinkled her nose with determination, squeezing her hands repeated to signal she wanted the woman. He grinned with triumph at Jillian’s adorable nature, knowing she was almost as tempting as honey to a beautiful woman. “She’s really taken with you.”

“So I noticed.”

“We’d like to know if angels’ actually have names.”

“You’d have to ask one.”

“I think we are, huh, Jillie?” AJ quipped, pulling Jillian away from his chest. Holding Jillian just underneath her arms, he held her out toward the woman. He arched his dark brows with question, allowing the woman to hold Jillian. He was silent for a moment, allowing Jillian to work her enchanting charm that first fixated Howie in the hospital. “So, what’s the fallen angel’s name?”

“My name’s Stevanie.”

“That’s almost as beautiful as you.”

“Thank you.”

“My name’s—”

“AJ! What are you doing with my daughter?” Howie’s voice interrupted, causing AJ to cringe. He glanced behind to see Keveney, Howie, and Nick approaching. His heart immediately crashed to his feet as a sharp blush crept to his tan cheeks. He shifted quickly back toward the woman, hoping to wrap the conversation quickly and pretend as if he hadn’t heard his name. Though, everything seemed to crash with Howie’s repetition of AJ’s name.

“What does he mean his daughter, AJ?” Stevie questioned with a raise of her plucked brow. Stevie had parted from Keveney, Howie, and Brian because she forgot something in the limo. When she was coming back to the loading site alone, she had been caught within AJ’s radar. So, she had followed with AJ’s elaborate pick-up scheme, hoping he would realize that something was askew. But, AJ was notorious for his wild streak of unending sexual appeal and hunger.

“I have no idea what he’s talking about!” AJ explained with a nervous laugh.

“Oh, really?” Stevie murmured, trying not to laugh as Jillian squealed for Howie’s attention.

“Yes!” AJ blurted.

“My daughter is not a pick-up tool!” Howie bellowed. “How many times—”

“He’s psycho, really, walks around this block all the time, just screaming for someone to stop taking his kid. Only, it’s this broken baby doll in a shopping cart. It’s sad really, so we told him our names—”

“Jillie-Bean!” Howie cooed, taking her from Stevie’s arms without a second thought. He hugged her close as Jillian pressed open mouth kisses to Howie’s face. Her gurgled incessantly, voicing a happy conversation with her father. He laughed at her adorable nature, allowing Keveney to take her next for another round of kisses. So, Howie turned on AJ with a sharp glare. “I can’t believe you, AJ. Don’t use my daughter for your perversion—”

“Now, sir, your baby doll’s in the shopping cart, remember?”

“How about you remember to stop making such a jackass of yourself in front of Kevie’s sister.”

“I’m not—” AJ immediately deflated when he turned to Stevie. “Her sister?”

“It’s Stevanie Moore,” Stevie admitted with a grin.

“You knew all along?” AJ groaned.

“Guilty.”

“In retrospect of this disaster, you should probably stick to laying a Rockstar for a record label approach,” Keveney snorted, causing the others to laugh at AJ’s obvious dating blunders and first impressions.

*~*~*

“If you say thank you one more time, Ms. Moore, I think I’ll be forced to initiate a terrifying wrath,” Brian finally announced with an amused smirk, watching Stevie fidget on the soft couch. She hadn’t calmed since stepping onto the lavish country-styled tour bus, unable to sit still for a mere moment. Even now, she tapped the pads of her fingertips furiously against her bare knees while playing with her tongue ring, exploiting her nervous habits. However, Brian found it more than endearing that she was so apprehensive around him. That’s why he had invited her to stay on his tour bus for the duration of the trip, to satisfy his uncharacteristic hunger of infatuation.

“Please, just call me Stevie,” she fumbled, swallowing hard as Brian sat close. She tried to ignore the sensation of their knees pressing together in the comfy setting. It just seemed so surreal to be with him in the privacy of his tour bus. It wasn’t that she that she hadn’t mixed with fame or important names before, but Brian was absolutely different in her critical eyes. He was a man that she actually saw herself settling down with and marrying, though, she had always thought it would be an imitation of Brian’s characteristics. But this moment had flipped her thoughts completely upside-down. And she was giddy, emotion wreck.

“And since you have a picture of me in my intimates, it goes without saying that you can call me—”

“Brian—”

“Actually, I was thinking Mr. Littrell,” Brian mused, noticing a dark blush creep to her cheeks. He offered a genuine smile at the cuteness she displayed, not expecting her to be too shy. After the limo ride to the loading lot, Brian had figured Stevie to be anything but shy and intimidated. “Can’t tease you much, huh?”

“No… You’d think I’d be used to it given the fact that I’m related to Kevie… She’s so damn sarcastic and goofy and—”

“What about you?” Brian interrupted, leaning back against the couch.

“Me?” Stevie squeaked, leaning forward in shock. The interest seeping from Brian’s beautiful gaze caused her mind to focus upon him instead of her whereabouts within the space of the tour bus. She was dumfounded at the prospect of having Brian want her. She thought maybe she was misreading signals, till she found herself on the bus floor in Brian’s trimmed muscular arms.

“Are you okay?” Brian laughed in amusement, glancing down into the enchanting gray eyes that sparked with confusion. Stevie had been so perplexed that she leaned forward too far, tumbling off the couch. She almost knocked her head off the table, only Brian managed to catch her safely within his arms as they both fell. Usually, he was somewhat immune to the cheap knightly rescues demonstrated in many movies and literature. After seeing so many fans faint, he had started to wonder if it was even necessary. He tried to pay no mind to the girls’ hysteria now. But, with Stevie, he wanted to fall into the cliché romance.

“Huh?”

“You fell!”

“I… You… Huh?”

“You’re something else,” Brian chuckled, taking the first step to brush his fingertips just beneath her chin.

*~*~*

“So, when are you going to tell me the whole story about your last girlfriend?”

Howie immediately stumbled back from Jillian’s crib, falling onto the king-sized bed at the projecting of Keveney’s warm voice. He had just been lulling Jillian to sleep with her favorite song off the Black and Blue album when Keveney had interrupted him. He reached to press his hand over his thumping heart as his jaw fell slightly ajar when he followed her shadow from the doorway. They had been traveling across the states for almost an entire day and the sun had quickly disappeared across the open road. So, Keveney had left Howie to lay Jillian down while she changed. And, she couldn’t have looked lovelier. Her straight blonde locks were twirled into pigtail braids to accentuate the innocence of her rubber ducky boxers and yellow, sleeveless t-shirt. Her curvaceous body peeked out from beneath the short nightwear, causing Howie’s blood to warm with naughty thoughts.

“Howie?”

He blinked rapidly to air the sexual notions flooding from her good intentioned innocence. “Sorry, I just got thrown by that random question.”

“It wasn’t random,” Keveney objected with a small pout. She watched Howie arch his dark brows, causing her pout to break into a Cheshire smile. She knew she had been caught within her impish teasing. She crawled into the large bed she’d share with Howie for the trips, shifting beneath the covers to find the perfect position to doze into a light slumber. “I heard the song you were singing to Jillie Bean. And, I just thought about your ex-girlfriend…”

“You think I wrote it for Roxie?” Howie guessed, quickly reading Keveney’s gorgeous violet eyes. He smiled with approval when he noticed the jealousy spark within her gorgeous facial features. It felt good to be wanted and notice the trivial lump of jealousy in Keveney’s heart. But, she looked too embarrassed with the idea as Howie continued to stare. “But, I didn’t. I wrote it for the two most special women in my life.”

“Yeah?”

“Oh, yes,” Howie quickly agreed, climbing into the bed with Keveney. She curled into his side for protection, thinking nothing of their closeness. In the past six months, Keveney had been known just to travel over to Howie’s house in the middle of the night to sleep next to a warm body. They acted like they were two best friends at a slumber party, though Howie’s heart longed for more than a best friend from Keveney. “And you know who they are.”

“Yeah, but what happened with Roxie?”

“Why can’t we talk about the non-existent man in your life? When I know for a fact that you’ve got doctors and patients literally drooling when you walk by and begging for you to at least take their numbers?”

“Roxie first.”

“But, it seems so wrong when I’m in bed with another beautiful woman.”

“Howie, we’re best friends...”

Keveney’s voice trailed at the establishment of their relationship, leaving Howie plenty of room to argue the point. He could speak plainly and confess his love. But, Howie swallowed the urge to confess, closing his eyes for the longest moment. “Roxie… Wasn’t the one for me, Kevie. She didn’t want some of the things that I did. She didn’t want kids. She didn’t want to get married. She didn’t want me. And, I felt like there was a hole in my heart. We just really didn’t fit together as lovers.”

“Oh,” Keveney whispered through the dark, pressing tight into the comfort of his arms. She gently rubbed her hand over his chest as if she were soothing his broken heart. “I think we fit together.”

“We do fit together.”

“So, if you don’t find anyone by the time Jillian starts school, does that mean that I’ll find a huge honking ring on my fourth left digit?”

“I think we could arrange that.”

“I’m partial to silver more than gold. Well, white gold is beautiful, too… We’ll say white gold instead of silver. My birthstone is a sapphire. And, really, don’t worry about the cost. We can always get an extra forklift to carry the rock on my hand—”

“Keveney,” Howie scorned with a laugh.

“What?” she cooed, kissing his cheek.

“Go to sleep.”

“Okay, but just let me offer a fair warning if all your dates should fall apart by a series of bizarre and very coincidental misfortunes.”

Chapter 19 – So Close

“You are such a gigantic pussy, D! One of the biggest romantic fools in this entire world! Stop playing the game and get with it already. These conversations are finally starting to lose just the tiniest bit of their charge! I mean, let’s just evaluate your pitiful nature. First you invite Kevie to see our first concert, but that’s not enough! You then put a rose at her front row seat, and pawn Jillie off on your body guard for the evening! Damn, if you went any further to layer on the sweetness, Kevie’s ass would have been dipped in gold! But, when she asks what’s all this about, you choke! You actually have the balls to say you’re just friends and that entire evening was a thank you for just coming on tour?! I never thought I’d live to see the day when the Latin Lover would bomb out worse than Nick!” AJ raved as he paced around the central room of the penthouse suite they always booked in the fanciest of hotels. Usually, AJ would be relaxing in the giant hot tub, but after the first concert he was always ready to race the entire world. He was wired tightly from giant rushes of adrenaline from their recent concert, but the boys suggested they just go back to the hotel to relax for the evening. So, AJ decided to release a few spurts of sarcastic adrenaline on his best friend.

“Give Howie a break,” Kevin chuckled with a half-hearted chide, reaching for another slice of pizza before settling back beside Howie on the luscious couch. He offered a scornful smile toward AJ before he could open his mouth, knowing that it was cruel to torture Howie so much. It was obvious that Howie had deep affections for Keveney, which made him utterly nervous about confessing his feelings. However, that didn’t matter, because the boys loved to exploit his blunders of love. And Kevin may have been the oldest, but his authority was limited when it came to camaraderie.

“But—”

“Kevin’s right,” Stevie interrupted, briefly glancing up from her laptop after finishing the last thought of a paragraph. She had quickly fallen into harmony with the group, making fast friendships with all of the boys. And, to be at the first concert of their Black and Blue Tour was an absolute honor. She had loved their music from the very beginning and delighted in being so close to their lives. So, now she was furiously typing her first article from the road, eager to share with the fans an intimate view of what most people only dreamed about. “Stop harassing Howie, because Kevie is way too blonde to even realize the signals he’s throwing. Let’s face it, he’s going to have to go a distance just short of completely stripping to his bare skin with candlelight and—”

“A condom box tied with a purple bow?” Nick laughed.

“I’d nix the bow, she might think she forgot a birthday and rush to a Hallmark Store,” Stevie added.

Nick’s eyes widened with delight, “She—”

“She would. Trust me.”

“Not when a guy’s trying to throw down moves—”

“Oh, yes when a guy’s trying to throw down moves! I distinctly remember her telling me
about laughing hysterically at a man who comes out of her bathroom in a pink condom after thinking she gave the go ahead for a romp in the sack. He busted out of that bathroom like John Wayne and she died. She said it looked like a piece of chewed bubble gum and actually stumbled out of her bedroom, collapsing in the living room while I was having a private date. The poor guy probably never wants to have sex again...”

“You’re kidding!” AJ exploded with sheer delight.

“Do you think I could make something like that up?”

“What’d she say that made him think he was scoring?” Nick laughed.

“She was looking through her basket of clean clothes and found her favorite pair of boxers and exclaimed that she was scoring tonight. He heard her from the bathroom and put two and two together… Only it was the wrong two! I don’t think she’s ever looked at a piece of pink bubblegum without laughing hysterically—”

“D, didn’t you just buy a pack of pink Trojan condoms?” Nick piped, wiggling his light brows toward Howie with delight. “Extra sensitive if I recall. Thinks he’s such a sensitive lover—”

“Guys! She’s right in that bedroom with Jillian! Can you just shut up! For once I’d like not to turn beet red in front of Kevie! Please!” Howie exploded, morbidly embarrassed by his friends. He hated how they could be so crass about affairs of the heart – especially his heart and affairs.

“Don’t worry; she’s so dense that she’d never—”

“That I’d never what, Evie?” Keveney cooed, slipping into the main living room that the rest occupied. She arched her light brows with amusement as she reached for own slice of pizza, slightly surprised that any remained with the boys ravaging the various boxes. It had taken her awhile to soothe Jillian back into a deep slumber. But the startled faces intrigued her more. “Well?”

“Uh…” Nick trailed, his pupils constricting as his eyes widened in horror.

“Perfect explanation, Nick,” Stevie groaned with a sharp sarcasm. She thought about smacking him, but Brian quickly delivered the blow instead. Her eyes widened with delight at the thought of them thinking in the same manner. She actually smiled at him till Keveney kicked the back of her chair. Stevie yelped sharply, almost tumbling from the cozy position she had finally fidgeted into upon the chair.

“I’m waiting!”

“For what?”

“For my answer, dumbass!”

“We just thought you might be too blonde to analyze the deeper meanings of the songs!” Stevie blurted without warning.

“You mean like sadness is beautiful and loneliness is tragical?” Keveney snorted.

“Yeah—”

“Well, figure it this way. Sadness is beautiful because the only way you can be sad is to have something and lose it. It’s beautiful because you realize something that you really wanted and you hope that somewhere along the way you’ll get the chance to keep going. And loneliness is tragical because you never know what you’re missing if you’re always alone.”

“I never even thought about it like that,” AJ mused, “And I’m the dumbass that sings it.”

“She just pulled that out of her ass!” Stevie argued with annoyance.

“True, but I do have some serious arguments for the songs!” Keveney announced, plopping down beside Howie.

“Good Lord,” Stevie murmured knowingly.

“Just wait,” Keveney argued, “I think the concert was fantastic. All your fans absolutely adore you. And your voices are beautiful. But, some of those songs, what the Hell were you thinking?”

“What do you mean?” Brian laughed.

“Um…” Keveney paused for a moment, “I remember listening to some with the Double L—”

“Our twin sisters,” Stevie explained, glancing back to Keveney. She had never heard Keveney’s take on the boys’ songs. But knowing Keveney, it was purely insane.

“Right,” Keveney sighed, clicking her tongue at the interruptions. Even growing up, Stevie had been mouthy and quick to interrupt whatever Keveney was trying to explain. However, for once, Stevie quieted and Keveney pressed on. “Let’s start with The Call that’s the one with you guys are acting like major assholes with a girl you’re singing all the other love songs about, right?

“I don’t think I like where this is going…” Brian snickered.

“C’mon, seriously! Listen baby, I’m sorry? Just wanna tell you don’t worry? I will be late, don’t stay up and wait for me? You’re dropping out? My battery is low? We’re going to a place nearby? Gotta go? … Oh, hell no!” Keveney started to rave with a passion that caused all the boys to sit back within the various couches in awe. “Where do you get off? Honestly! Let’s not even begin to mention the fact that your ass is sneaking out and around, but the lamest excuse you can come up with to get off the phone is that you’re battery is going low? It’s called a car charger, asshole!”

“Damn,” AJ wheezed with laughter as Keveney fumed about a simple song that received great feedback from the fans. It was almost as if no one had really taken the time to analyze the situation, except for Keveney.

“You’re ass would be complete and utter grass! Don’t even think about coming home late after you’ve been lying in some other skank’s crusty bed—”

“What about All I Have to Give?” Howie prompted, thinking she might actually start swinging.

“The one where you talk about giving everything and anything for love?”

“That’s the one,” Kevin laughed, noticing the flicker in her soft, violet eyes.

“You guys are freaking loaded with cash and you’re singing about only being able to offer love? Please! Load me up with some trickles of adoration and a vintage mustang for flavor! We aren’t back in the 1800s where women jumped into a nearby bed as soon as she got a pack of pencils! Love takes commitment… And a growing bank account!”

The boys immediately glanced to Stevie for an explosive rebuttal. Only, Stevie shrugged calmly. “What? Haven’t’ you ever heard Madonna’s Material Girl? Kevie’s got a really good point. Girls love to be pampered and I intend to be spoiled rotten.”

*~*~*

“Your sister is quite the firecracker,” Brian announced into the dimly lit living room, catching Stevie off-guard. She had been propped upon the couch with her dainty legs tucked beneath her bottom. She leaned over the coffee table, the short piece of her chin length hair catching upon the rim of her glasses. She didn’t even bother to blow the bit of hair away, just leaning further to study her words. He smiled as she chewed upon the inside of her cheek, obviously lost within her thoughts. For a moment, he didn’t want to disturb her, but he heard the typing from his bedroom and couldn’t sleep. He wanted to speak with her so badly while he had the chance, otherwise he feared that he’d never be able to sleep again. Knowing she was just a few short feet away caused tingles to race down his spine. Their private conversation on the tour bus had been absolutely thrilling. After finding out her deepest insecurities, hopes, and dreams, Brian had come to an ultimate conclusion – he needed her.

“Brian!” Stevie yelped in surprise, almost knocking her laptop to the floor. She quickly reacted as the laptop wobbled, yanking it backward as she fell hard into the couch. She wheezed in shock, finding her heart pattering heavily against her ribcage. She hadn’t expected anyone to be awake at that hour. That’s why she had come to the living room, mostly to let Keveney sleep peacefully in the bedroom.

“Sorry,” Brian murmured, smiling softly with a sincere apology twinkling in the midst of his light blue eyes.

“No! It’s fine! You didn’t—”

“What are you working on?” Brian questioned, quickly stopping her rambling by allowing her to focus elsewhere. She smiled gratefully and patted the nearby cushion on the soft couch. He simply nodded with the same smile, seating himself on the couch.

“Just finished my article,” Stevie explained, running her fingers over the keys of her favorite laptop. “I was going to ask Howie to read it first, since he’s the one that worked and plucked all the strings to make sure I got the gig… But, why don’t you be my Beta?”

“Beta?”

“The first person to read the piece of work.”

“Oh! I’d be honored,” Brian quickly agreed with understanding, scooting closer to lean over Stevie. He inhaled the sweet scent of her perfume and licked his lips with hunger. She was absolutely intoxicating, making him yearn to do things his mother would blush over. Shivering slightly, he quickly averted the thought of kissing her delicate neck to the screen of words. He glanced to the title, smiling when he read: Five Daddies and a Baby. The statement was true enough, the boys were raising Jillian together whether they agreed to it or not. Howie needed all the help they could offer and they were brothers. His child was their child and they had fallen in love with Jillian just as easily as Howie had. So, agreeing with the title, he easily tumbled into Stevie’s tale of chance and honor.

“So?” Stevie blurted nervously, watching him click through the article at a slow pace. Usually, she never worried about critiquing before, because she was always revered for her excellent work. However, like always, Brian proved to be different in her heart. Not that she placed him upon a pedestal, but she wanted him to enjoy the article and she wanted him to love her.

“Hold on,” Brian laughed, feeling the energy zipping from her body into his own like a brilliant charge of electricity.

“But—”

“Hold on!”

“Bri—”

“I’m done,” Brian finished, causing Stevie to sigh dramatically. She collapsed against the back of the couch, pressing her hands tightly to her face. She felt Brian’s leg against her own, which immediately caused her to tense. However, the silence of the room made her rapidly uneasy. Cautiously, she peeked out from behind her hands to find him smiling sweetly to her reaction. “Do I make you nervous, Stevie?”

“Tell me what you thought first before I make an idiot out of myself.”

“I thought that the article was fantastic and I’m more than willing to give you all the dirt on each of the boys.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, if I could take you out for an evening.”

Chapter 20 – Madness of Romance

“Evie, if you come at me with one more runway pose of possible date-wear, I think I might be forced to smother you with Jillian’s burp-rag,” Keveney announced dryly, wrinkling her nose in distaste as another garment was flung to the hotel bed. Obviously, Keveney thought that Stevie’s flurry of excited panic over a simple outfit was outrageous. The older sister had been rambling nonstop since Brian’s sweet offer at a date, constantly asking Keveney’s opinion of various fashion choices. Only, Keveney had no view point over any type of style. She wore whatever was comfortable, not really caring if it was cute, shapely, or if it even matched. But, that was the difference between the two women. Stevie wanted perfection for the evening, because what she felt for Brian was real. She didn’t want the casual fling that usually occurred between her and various men around Orlando. She wanted true love and could only hope it would entice Keveney to think about Howie in another beautiful light.

“Smother me with a burp-rag? Attractive, Kevie, real attractive,” Stevie returned, smoothing the pale pink baja sundress along her curved figure for a perfect fit. She stared intensely into the mirror at her reflection, deciding it was absolutely perfect to make Brian drool. The dress straps wrapped around her sleek neck for a halter style and attached to the v-neck drop of the neckline which was notched with a beautiful detailing. The soft fabric then wrapped around her body and ended with a whispered hem just above her knees. She looked like a true bohemian beauty with her glossy brown locks gelled into a sexy mess. Smiling, she glanced briefly to her little sister for final approval only to notice the deep frown. Stevie laughed, however, it was so rare to see that specific emotion plastered on Keveney’s face. If anything, the woman was always laughing hysterically at her foolishness. “Are you jealous?”

“No, I’m not jealous,” Keveney snorted, hearing Jillian grunt for attention. She glanced down to see Jillian holding out her arms from her perch on the soft hotel carpet. Immediately complying, Jillian was scooped and cuddled against Keveney’s chest with several quick kisses to elicit happy coos. Jillian babbled against Keveney’s shoulder, tilting to suck occasionally on her warm bottle. Since Howie and AJ had gone out early that evening, Keveney had the opportunity to baby-sit both Stevie and Jillian.

“So, you’re really happy for me?”

“Of course, Evie,” Keveney instantly answered, allowing Jillian to settle against her lap. Sweetly, she smoothed Jillian’s glossy curls while smiling at her sister. She couldn’t have been more excited when Stevie exploded about her dating prospect, but acting otherwise was so much more fun. “You deserve a love life.”

“Should I take that as an insult?”

“If you want—”

“Keveney!”

“Sorry,” Keveney laughed, shifting to hold Jillian to her chest as she stood from the large bed. Whenever drinking warm milk, Jillian always tired easily. So, Keveney swayed softly as she hummed into Jillian’s ear and it took only a few moments for Jillian to fall into a beautiful slumber. And, Stevie was quick to admire the moment for what it was. It seemed so natural for Keveney to hold Jillian against her chest, just swaying slowly with a soft lullaby vibrating from her lips to Jillian’s tiny ear, causing a tiny smile to spread across Jillian’s puckered lips.

“You’ve got a way with kids, Kevie,” Stevie announced into the quiet room, causing Keveney to drawl away from the perfect moment. She then watched Keveney gently ease Jillian into the opposite hotel bed, covering her with a beautiful multi-colored crochet baby blanket crafted by Howie’s mother. She made sure that the blanket was away from the child’s face and wrapped tightly around Jillian’s body for a snuggled comfort. She then bent to place a gentle kiss against Jillian’s forehead, causing Stevie to smile with approval. Keveney had always been nurturing to their younger siblings.

“And you’ve got a way with men,” Keveney admitted ruefully, glancing back to her sister. Her light violet eyes flickered with adoration for her older sister, obviously slightly envious of Stevie’s flirtatious abilities. “Bri really likes you.”

“You think?!”

“I know.”

“Really?”

“Yes, he’s been on the phone nonstop since you said yes.”

“You know what I know? Since you’re finally being sweet?”

“What?”

“That you have a way with Howie and all the guys you come in contact with. You have a way of oblivious flirting. You have such a sexual aggression that causes boys to drool; only you act like everyone’s your best buddy. But Howie wants more! If you would just take a step to him, we’d be bickering about what you should be wearing for a seriously steamy date.”

“You’re wrong.”

“Huh? About?”

“I wasn’t being sweet,” Keveney answered lightly, knowing exactly how to throw Stevie off her love life. She hated when they got into these heated debates about who Keveney should date. If anything, Keveney was more concerned about her career goals, even if she was desperately in love with Howie. For now, she was happy being in denial.

“Really?” Stevie snorted

“Yeah, I was just trying to soften the blow when I suggested that some outfits are better left on the hanger...”

“You…” Stevie whirled back to the mirror with a frown, giving Keveney the perfect chance to escape without any further debate on her love life. Immediately, Stevie’s mind started to rumble in a flurry of panic, unable to believe that Keveney could be so calculated and evil. She thought she had looked so perfect, but Keveney planted a seed of doubt. And, Stevie didn’t have the self-esteem to doubt her adorable little sister’s cruel intentions. “Damnit, Keveney Marie!”

*~*~*

“I could strangle Brian,” Howie seethed quietly when Brian had escorted Stevie for an evening of whimsical romance. He just watched with complete dismay as the door closed behind a round of laughter and giggles, actually causing Goosebumps of aggravation to prickle against his warm skin. It wasn’t that he was actually furious with Brian and developed some sort of twisted love triangle, but frustrated with his own insecurities relating to Keveney. Brian had only known Stevie for about two days and already had taken the initiative to ask her out to dinner. Howie had known Keveney for longer than six agonizing months; still, he hadn’t the courage to even press a kiss to her gentle hand. Although, Howie had managed to convince himself that his cowardice was appropriate, because Keveney was far too precious to him. He wanted no mistakes when he worked in the perfect and most enchanting kiss. Still, he envied Brian’s fearlessness. “Damnit, Brian!”

“Jillian’s down for the night. So, we’ve got many hours to struggle with how very much in love Brian and Stevie are going to fall. But, those hours of agony together cannot possibly compare to the disgust and turmoil to follow in the earning hours of next morning. Do you realize that I share a room with that wild woman? So, I’ll know whether or not she finally got that sex-thing out of her system. Because, if she doesn’t come home…” Keveney did a full body shudder as she exited from Howie’s bedroom where she had just laid Jillian to rest. She seemed completely oblivious to Howie’s ranting, more obsessed with her own ideas about Stevie’s steamy date. “But if she does come home… There’s a damn good chance that Brian will be following her into the bedroom for some nasty tainting of Bible laws… And, I doubt that I want to figure out whether that rumor about a butt tattoo is true or not... It might just escalate that good old fashioned sibling rivalry that I’ve been perfecting over the years!”

“Rivalry?” Howie was quick to reply. “Why?”

“Because I was invited on this tour first! I should have gotten first dibs on you boys. I should have been able to pick out which man I wanted to establish a torrent love affair with during this six month tour! Instead, she saunters her way onto a tour bus to first catch AJ’s attention and then Brian’s attention! There are two boys totally taken away from my pool of prince charming’s! It’s not like there’s a box anywhere that I can pour milk on and one instantly pops up!”

“Is that your way of saying that you were hoping to score a date with Brian?” Howie immediately questioned with a tight smile, trying to be as aloof as physically possible. Although, inside, it felt like a hideous ulcer was chewing through his entire abdomen with deadly speed. The very thought of her being interested in another man, let alone one of his good friends, was excruciating.

“Nah, he’s too perfect in my eyes…” Keveney trailed, making a face. “The original Bible Thumper… Or maybe I over-project a portion of his character in attempts to make him un-datable because my sister is infatuated with him…”

“So, you really do have an interest in him?”

“Hell no,” Keveney laughed, “If my sister likes him, then he’s obviously not my type of man. My sister and I have never had similar tastes in men. Such a tragic flaw, huh? Makes dating twice as hard, because I just can’t take her leftovers…”

“Extremely,” Howie trailed, arching his dark brows with a curious interest. He now began to wonder if she had eyes for anyone else on the tour. And if they had fallen onto the topic, it was easy enough to continue without seeming too jealous about her choices. “What about Nick?”

“Too cute.”

“Kevin?”

“Too damn old!”

“AJ?”

Keveney eyes widened as if Howie told her she had some fatal disease. “Please! He gets more ass than a toilet seat!”

“Then what do you like?” Howie laughed with relief.

“Not a walking STD, that’s for sure—”

“Keveney!”

“Sorry…” Keveney giggled, leaning back on the couch to study Howie’s profile. She reflected on her wants for a moment, analyzing Howie’s handsome features with a bemused smile. Instantly, the man of her dreams reflected back in her beautiful violet eyes. “Someone completely opposite of me, that’s for sure. Like, he can be quiet, reserved, and serious, but know exactly how to get loud and crazy to compliment me. I want someone to be my rock and always willing to hold me. He’s not afraid of cuddling me no matter who’s around or showing that he loves me like no one else. Someone like—”

“Me?”

Keveney offered a warm smile of surprise as Jillian whined from the bedroom for attention. She stood to kiss his forehead, knowing that Jillian always had the perfect timing when it came to interrupting Keveney and Howie’s intimate moments. “You’re absolutely perfect for me, Howie. Why else would I be willing to wait five years for all my voodoo dolls to work their evil charms on your girlfriends?”

*~*~*

“My God, you didn’t have to shell out all this money for our first date, Brian. Kevie and I were just kidding about the whole All I Have to Give… Okay, so I really do want spoiled rotten by the love of my life, but I didn’t expect you to pull out all the stops right away!” Stevie exclaimed, taking Brian’s hand as he helped her into the already bubbling Jacuzzi. She thought that her eyeballs were going to become sunburned because they had maintained a widened state since the date had started. Brian had rented an expensive yacht just for the evening. No one but the crew was allowed onto the yacht to dote upon the new couple during their romantic evening. They had spent the gorgeous sunset walking about the docks with fruity drinks melting against their palms while chatting softly about various topics. Now, Brian wanted them to stare at the beautifully starlit sky in the top deck’s large Jacuzzi.

“So, I am the love of your life?” Brian mused.

“If you keep playing your cards right…”

“Good. And you’re right, I didn’t have to do it, but I wanted to do it,” Brian explained boldly, allowing Stevie to first submerse in the bubbling liquid before he took his own seat. Instantly, he scooted close to her warm body so they could melt into one another. She looked mesmerizing under the dim lighting. Her red highlighted, brunette locks were glossed back with the water and her reading glasses missing from the bridge of her petite nose, allowing Brian to view her beautiful face without any hindrances. And, the one piece swimsuit with the sides missing to reveal her creamy skin drove Brian insane with a much needed passion. Finally, he was starting to feel all the fervor behind the love songs he sang every night to thousands of devoted fans.

“Well, I’m glad you wanted to.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yes, in fact I think you should do more things that you want to do, instead of things that you have to do. I think that’s the only really crappy thing about working in the limelight. You’re constantly told what to do and when to do it. But, you’re a person just like everyone else. You should have the freedom to do what you want, when you want.”

“Do you know what I want to do right now?”

“What?”

“This,” he murmured, tilting her face within his hands without the slightest warning. His hands were warm despite the cooler winds blowing against the top of the deck and his lips were just as warm. Their hearts instantly melted to compliment the sweetness of the kiss, causing Stevie’s eyes to flutter close with excitement. There was just a sweet tenderness their lips slowly parted, causing Stevie to blush with appreciation.

“Somehow, I didn’t imagine that’s how our first kiss would go,” she whispered, resting her forehead against his with delight.

“Why’s that?”

“Because I wanted to kiss you first,” Stevie explained, moving the deeper passion in their hearts behind their second, third, and forth kisses.

Chapter 21 – Almost the Perfect Escape

“This is so sucking ass right now! How is it that the best and hottest Backstreet Boy is left to play Mom for the night? It’s a damn conspiracy, you know that? The guys are getting back at me for getting the most thongs thrown to me during a single show! But, that’s not my fault! How can you blame me for being so damn good looking, right? Besides, I’m the one that should be out on a hot date,” Nick grumbled with annoyance, settling down on the soft carpet with his banana split that the boys had actually bribed him with for the evening. Though, Nick was still upset with his circumstances since the group had arrived in Georgia and had the evening off. And Kevin, obviously being the first to settle into his room, had offered to take Stevie and Keveney out to a special southern dinner. AJ then had formulated a quick date with a lovely woman in the hotel lobby to get out of babysitting Jillian for the night. And, when those four disappeared, Brian and Howie suddenly disappeared after leaving quick instructions in between Nick’s long winded spurts of whining. So, the aftermath had slowly settled and Nick glanced to his lady of the night – Jillian.

“Mmm?” Jillian mumbled with an innocent smile, glancing up from her bright colored blocks. Her beautiful green eyes glistened with curiousness as her tiny button nose wrinkled at Nick’s venting frustrations. She had been playing quietly for the entire evening since Keveney settled her on the special infant activity mat. Though, Nick’s soliloquy of annoyance had dragged her away from her child’s play and enticed her into playing with Nick instead.

“No offense, Jillie,” Nick laughed, scooping another spoonful of ice cream. He popped the spoon into his mouth, withdrawing it to mumble another sentence to the infant as the coldness settled into his mouth. “It’s not you, Baby. It’s me.”

“No!” Jillian replied, pointing a tiny finger toward her babysitter.

“Excuse me?” Nick mused in surprise, watching Jillian reach for the couch as if she were moving to strike him. With a brief struggle and a grunt of determination, she managed to pull herself up into a standing position. Nick then watched as she tottered toward him while holding tight to the cushions.

“Mmmnah!” Jillian gurgled, reaching to hold onto Nick’s shirt for balance instead of the couch.

“You think we can work this out, huh? Me with the mixed up schedule of a musician and you not even being able to go anywhere without a diaper bag? Honestly, Jillie, what kind of life is that?”

“Bah,” Jillian continued, nodding toward Nick as she stepped into his lap. She grinned with amusement as his lips contorted into an ‘o’ of surprise, spurring her antics forward to elicit another funny face. She bounced slightly as she held on, giggling as Nick made various faces with the changes in pressure from her tiny feet against his groin. She seemed completely delighted with Nick’s actions, until her emerald eyes settled back onto Nick’s bright blue ice cream bowl. Without warning, she reached for the bowl and tugged hard to discover the sticky contents inside.

“Jillian!” Nick squawked in disbelief as the bitterly cold, slightly melted ice cream sloshed against the pair, covering them with a dark, sticky shower of sweetness before Nick could react. The cold substance seeped quickly into his expensive shirt as Jillian plucked the banana on his chest to nibble on as she squished it between her pudgy fingers. She seemed completely unmoved by the attack of ice cream, more pleased with the sweet treats she discovered from her babysitter’s clothing. Though, Nick was less than amused, making a face of pure disgust as the liquid seemed to soak every single pore along his body, chilling him to the bone. “You’re like every other woman in America! Only after me for my goods! Next thing you know—”

“Jillie Bean?”

“Oh shit! The jig is up!” Nick cursed in horror, recognizing Keveney’s melodious voice as the door leading to the joining rooms opened. Not wanting to look utterly foolish, he leapt up with a sticky Jillian nestled in his arms. He hadn’t a clue where to run to, pausing for a slight moment. Quick planning was never a forte in his genetic makeup. So, when he attempted to get away, he ran straight into Keveney and Stevie’s curious stares instead. Immediately, Nick held Jillian away from him as if she were an illegal item that he was offering to the police. “This isn’t what it looks like!”

“So, a sundae didn’t explode like the Fourth of July on top of your head?” Stevie mused with a wicked grin.

“She did it!” Nick whined with a furious blush, feeling as if his manhood had been severed from his body as the girls laughed harder.

“Then I hope she got the cherry to herself for all that effort,” Keveney laughed as Jillian squirmed within Nick’s arms, babbling for attention. She wiggled her tiny fingers toward Keveney as she continued to lick at the chocolate ice cream covering her messy, but still angelic face. She was an absolute mess from Nick’s babysitting disaster, covered with a thick chocolate, strawberry, and peanut butter syrup, a mixture of Neapolitan ice cream, splatters of whip cream, a sprinkle of nuts, and mashed bananas. But, Keveney thought she was adorable as she took her from Nick without any hesitation about the mess. “You’re definitely in need of a bubble bath, Sugar Pie.”

“No!” Jillian giggled, offering a bit of the banana between her fingers to Keveney.

“Trust me, you’re still sweet as honey, no matter what’s coating your little face! But, Daddy will be furious if he comes home to see the bees stealing you away from us!”

“Mmm,” Jillian cooed, pressing her sticky hands to Keveney’s cheeks as she offered several open mouthed kisses.

“Guess I need one, too,” Keveney groaned ruefully, kissing Jillian’s whip creamed forehead.

“Wait! I’m dirty too! Don’t I get to join the bubble bath? Make it a threesome?” Nick asked with a devilish grin, wiggling his light brows with delight.

“Not until I get another three zeros added to the back of my paycheck,” Keveney declined, playfully licking Nick’s fudge covered cheek with a seductive smile. “But you’re sweet…”

“Damn tease!” Nick hissed in pain as Keveney disappeared, only to hear a snort from Stevie. Slowly, he turned to notice the same glitter in the older sister’s eyes that frequently visited Keveney’s violet eyes. Immedaitely, he knew his disaster was going to be used against him in a bitter tale of blackmail. “You’re not…”

“Oh yes, I am! Every single word!” Stevie announced, snapping a photograph from her small digital camera of Nick’s catastrophe.

“Damnit! What is wrong with you women? Do you guys have a different Bible that says Thou shall torture those men more beautiful than thou?!”

*~*~*

“I… I just can’t believe you asked Stevie out after only knowing her for—”

“Only two days!” Brian finished, glancing toward Howie with a bemused smirk. It wasn’t much of a surprise for Brian to finish that specific sentence from Howie’s mouth. After all, during the entire evening, Howie continued to comment on Brian’s goof fortune with Stevie. Most men would have taken Howie’s commentary as offensive, but Brian knew better. Howie was absolutely thrilled with Brian’s whirlwind romance, but overly mournful over his own lack of confidence. Brian could only hope that Howie might follow through with his heart and actually ask Keveney into his life as more than just a friend. But, until then, Brian would continue to run circles with Howie about his love life until Howie got one of his own. “I really like her.”

“That’s obvious!”

“What?”

“I’m sorry, B,” Howie sighed, immediately backing down from the potential fight. Instead, he averted his eyes to his wallet, plucking out the keycard for their penthouse suite. “I’m just envious, y’know? It’s already obvious that you and Stevie are perfect. Yet, here I am—”

“Six months down the road knowing she’s the perfect woman, but having no clue how to just get the words into the right places to reveal your heart?”

“Why would you automatically assume that it’s trouble with Kevie?”

“I never said it was…”

“But…” Howie stared in disbelief, wondering how he managed to fall into that trap so easily. It just seemed typical that whenever Keveney was on his mind that it was easier for the boys to torment him. And, unable to finish his thought without falling deeper into the embarrassing pit, Howie pushed himself into living room. He hustled quickly to get away from Brian, thankful and somewhat disturbed by Nick’s presence and lack thereof of Jillian. “Nick!”

“What’d I do now?” Nick grimaced.

“Where’s my daughter?”

“You mean our daughter?”

“Don’t get cute!”

“She’s getting a bath—”

“And you left her—”

“With Keveney!”

“You…”

“She’s getting a bath with Keveney, I swear!”

“Then I’ll go help her,” Howie decided, telling himself more so than Brian and Nick. He was taking full advantage of the situation. He really wanted to get away from Brian and Nick’s usual torture, though seeing Keveney was far more important than the two knuckleheads. He had missed her during their separate evenings, only able to think about her when Brian started another conversation about how beautiful Stevie was. That’s why he had rushed directly into the bathroom, not bothering to knock upon the door since it was just Jillian’s bath time. “How are my two favorite…”

All the words left Howie’s brain when he realized that both of his favorite girls were settled in the bubbly tub instead of just the little girl. The color drained from his face as he gazed upon Keveney’s gorgeous silk skin that was accentuated seductively by the lighting of the expensive bathroom. Her blonde locks were tossed into a high messy bun, tender locks falling to compliment her heart shaped face and long, slender neck. The bubbles swirled just along the tips of her breasts, causing Howie’s heart to pound with excitement. He could only imagine his lustful dreams and a warm sweat immediately broke out onto his clammy skin.

“There’s Daddy!” Keveney cooed, acting as if nothing were awry.

“Oh, God! I’m so sorry!” Howie breathed, turning sharply to knock his forehead against the door. Only, the pain was nothing compared to his embarrassment. “I should have knocked! I had no idea that you were naked…er…nude...or... bare--no! Damnit! I’m so sorry! I just… Nick said you were bathing with Jillie. But he never said that you were bathing with—”

“Do you want to join us?”

“I beg your pardon?” Howie squeaked.

Impishly, Keveney smoothed away the bubbles to lift a bright purple bikini strap from her delicate shoulder, causing Howie to explode in humiliation and curses all over again.

Chapter 22 – A Matter of Eavesdropping

“Dada!”

“I believe she would like to have the white kitten as her present for this auspicious occasion,” Keveney teased wryly, reaching to retrieve the unstuffed kitten from the filled barrel. She and Howie had taken the day for ‘Jillie Bean’ time. It had been their first outing dedicated to ‘Jillie Bean’ time, so Howie was allowed to pick the first destination and Keveney would follow with the second at the next city. So, he decided to take the girls to the Build-A-Bear Workshop that actually allowed their customers to make their own furry stuffed animals within the store’s various stations. Howie had found the store to be quite entertaining from his personal point of view, deciding that his seven month old would delight in the store and hopefully Keveney, too.

“Are you making fun of my choice for Jillie Bean time?” Howie mused, allowing Jillian to hold the white kitten tight as she babbled excitedly to the stuffed animal, obviously planning their many activities of friendship once they were home.

“Never! I think this is really sweet. I never would have thought about renting out an entire store just for the three of us as a mini-party—”

“Why don’t you just repeat the first…oh…seven words you just said?”

Keveney stopped to glance at her friend with a furrowing of her honey blonde brows, obviously trying to remember which the first seven words were. “Never, I think this is really sweet?”

“Great, because Jillie Bean wants you to make one, too,” Howie decided, gently nudging Keveney toward the various barrels containing different choices of unstuffed animals. Keveney’s beautiful face contorted into a displeased scowl, but Howie held a finger to her lips to shush her contempt. He already knew what she was going to say just by the darkening of her gorgeous violet eyes. “Jillie told me she wanted us to make you one. Huh, Jillie Bean?”

“Mama!” Jillian agreed, already chewing on the ear of her kitten.

“Did she just…” Keveney was immediately at a loss of words when she glanced toward Howie. Jillian’s first word had obviously been ‘Dada,’ but no one expected her to learn ‘Mama,’ too. There was really no technical mother in Jillian’s life for her to associate with. Or so Keveney had originally thought. It was just such a shocking statement for the child to declare, causing Keveney’s heart to melt with a bittersweet awe. She gently reached to take Jillian into her arms, pressing a kiss to the child’s wrinkled nose. “Sweetheart, I’m not—”

“I don’t think we should correct her,” Howie quickly contradicted, smiling at Jillian’s declaration as Jillian reflected the grin.

“Howie…”

“You’re her mother in every meaning of the word. You’re the one that gets up with her at night. You make her breakfast. You dress her. You give her baths. You take care of her in every way when I’m not around. But, more importantly, you give her the love of a mother. So, I think you deserve that title, Kevie.”

“I’m not so sure...”

“I’m definite and so is Jillie Bean,” Howie laughed, reaching to affectionately kiss her cheek. “Tell her, Jillie Bean!”

“Mama,” Jillian chirped with a proud gurgle, kissing Keveney’s cheek. “Bababa.”

“She wants you to pick out your stuffed animal now,” Howie answered with a sly grin.

“You should have been a damn ventriloquist,” Keveney muttered, glancing into the various barrels of unstuffed bodies. Though, she couldn’t hide the smile on her face when she retrieved a soft purple teddy bear from the last barrel. She offered it toward Howie and they walked toward the employee readied at the stuffing station. Standing close together, they watched as the employee began to fill the stuffing into the animal, speaking to them about how adorable Jillian was when she clapped while the kitten transformed.

“Do you want any sound bytes to go in either animal?” the employee questioned. “You can make your own statements if you like.”

“I got, Jillie Bean’s kitty!” Keveney announced with excitement, bouncing over to the voice station with Jillian on her hip. Howie just watched with amusement as Keveney pressed to record her sound byte with a soft purr, “Love my Jillie Bean!”

“How original,” Howie laughed.

“She enjoyed it, huh?” Keveney defended, purring against Jillian’s cheek to elicit a giggle.
Only, the next part wasn’t so expected.

“Stand aside, I’ll show you how it’s done,” Howie contradicted, gently pushing Keveney away from the giant contraption. He thought for a moment about what he wanted her purple teddy bear to say, causing him to chew on his bottom lip. But, before Keveney could tease, Howie started to sing for his sound byte, “You taught me what love is supposed to be / It's all the little things that make you beautiful to me…”

Keveney smiled with approval as Howie returned to offer the sound byte to be placed inside her teddy bear. Chewing affectionately on her bottom lip, she carefully glanced up to Howie with awe. She had expected something typical to be placed inside her sound byte like a simple Give me a hug. But to have Howie sing such a special lyric from his personal song caused her heart to melt with adoration. “Do you really mean that, Howie?”

“What do you think?”

“Well—”

“Alright, Mom and Dad, we need you to kiss the hearts full of love for the animals.”

“Mom and Dad?” Keveney was quick to repeat in surprise, jerking away from Howie’s body.

“Yes, isn’t Dad and Daughter making this for Mom?”

“Mama! Dada!” Jillian agreed, clapping a hand against her newly made kitten.

Howie’s dark eyes widened in sheer horror at the employee’s statement. He waited for Keveney to start laughing hysterically at the proposal. He then wondered if the employee had actually been reading his thoughts. A film of cool sweat started to form against his forehead as he shoved his hands deep into his jeans pockets. “Uh… You have the wrong… I mean… It’s not that I… She’s my daughter… Well, she’s her daughter, too… Technically… But… Well… Er… We’re not—”

“Don’t you dare kid her, Sweetheart!” Keveney chided, reaching to take the pink heart from the employee. Sweetly, she pressed the heart to her lips for a quick kiss, holding it against hers while pressed their lips together. The first kiss with the heart was brief before Keveney allowed it to fall to her hands. She then reached again for their bare lips to connect with a sweet determination.

“Kevie—”

“Just following my instincts…” Keveney answered with a smile, handing the heart to the employee.

*~*~*

“Okay, before you totally chop my dick off to make me a woman, let’s figure out what kind of kiss you’re squealing about—”

“Do you have to be so graphic?” Howie scowled, glaring at his younger friend with disgust. He had sought AJ after returning from his family time with Keveney and Jillian, because he was aching for some kind of objective opinion. After Keveney had blatantly kissed him in the store, his mind had turned to complete mush. That is, until AJ described the way that Howie was emasculating him by asking a simple question about a simple kiss.

“Only in the presence of mixed company,” AJ assured with a feisty grin, offering Jillian a toy as she splashed in the large bathtub. AJ had given her some of his spaghetti for dinner while sought some profound privacy, which always had a way of covering every inch of the curious infant’s body instead of making it into her mouth. So, AJ had been designated to bathe the child, too, which he was actually doing without much complaint.

“That is completely ass-backwards, you know that?”

“Now who’s being so graphic?”

“Damnit J—”

“Okay, don’t get your panties in such a wad. We’ll talk about your obsession.”

“It’s not an obsession! She really did kiss me!”

“Where?”

“In the store—”

“Howie!” AJ grimaced, patting the water after Jillian splashed him. “You can be such a dumbass, you know that?”

“Oh…” Howie laughed nervously “On the lips…”

“What kind of kiss was it?” AJ continued to lead, motioning toward the towel sitting on the sink.

“Brief…”

“That’s all you can say about it?” AJ laughed, taking the towel from Howie’s hands. He leaned down into the large tub to wrap the towel around Jillian’s squirming body. Then, blowing a loud raspberry, AJ lifted Jillian out of the tub as if she were a shuttle being launched into space. Of course, Jillian had no objections, squealing loudly with delight.

“Well, it’s not like I didn’t enjoy it! I just, I was speechless about what happened! I mean, we’re making these teddy bears and we have to kiss these plush hearts to give the teddy bears’ love… Kevie puts the heart between our lips for the first kiss, but then lets the heart drop so our lips connect. It was so warm and filling, but it wasn’t passionate. Then, when I go to ask her about what happened, she said she was just ‘testing her instincts.’ What’s that about exactly?”

“Looks like she’s telling you to take a leap,” AJ answered simply, bringing Jillian close to his body as he rubbed away the water droplets from her wiry blonde curls while she babbled.

“Take the leap?”

“You’ve been in love with this girl since she helped me in the baby store—”

“I am not—”

“Stop bullshitting, Howie. It’s insulting my romantic intelligences,” AJ interrupted with a playful scowl. “The truth is that you love her. You’ve always loved her. And she loves you. Would you just admit it to yourself? She’s not like Roxie. She’s a wholesome girl with a lot of potential. A girl that’s ready to settle with a family – your family. She loves Jillian to pieces and she loves you unconditionally. She’s what you’ve always been looking for. So, take the leap.”

“AJ—”

“Take the leap,” AJ repeated, ending the conversation so he could finish dressing Jillian. But, as he carried Jillian into the living room, he felt a wet warmth soak against his t-shirt. Grimacing at the though of what it could possibly be, he carefully peeled the child away from his body to discover her little surprise which produced a hilarious giggle from her. AJ cringed with disgust as he smelled the distinct odor of urine. Slowly, he handed Jillian toward Howie with a scowl, keeping her as far away from his body as he possibly could. “…That little snot-nosed brat was just waiting to piss all over me like some little un-paper-trained scamp…”

*~*~*

“Admit it! You really do love Howie! You’re head over heels, flying on clouds, leaping for lizards, falling into a never ending spin cycle of passionate, romantic, delightful—”

“I never said I wasn’t, Evie,” Keveney laughed, retrieving her key car from her back pocket. Stevie had been anxious to locate an ice cream parlor for a wicked hot fudge sundae, but Brian had decided to play some video games with Nick. So, of course, Keveney was dragged off in search of the specific location without any room to complain about her older sister’s choices. And, after indulging in Stevie’s passions, Keveney had confessed about her recent encounter with Howie. Only, she hadn’t exactly planned for Stevie’s outrageous reactions to the kiss. “I just never would have even thought to mention it in such a… well… I mean, leaping for lizards? Where the Hell in your ass did you pull that from?”

“I just can’t believe you kissed him!”

“Did we just flip back into our teenage years? It’s not like when I cornered Corey in the boys’ bathroom—”

“But this is Howie Dorough that we’re talking about. Not some zit-faced dork just wanting to steal your panties from the gym lockers to supposedly prove he went to third base with the cutest girl—”

“Shut up!” Keveney suddenly hissed, ducking into the kitchen component of the suite when she noticed Howie playing with Jillian in the living room.

“I know you don’t get star struck, but there’s no need to get so pushy—”

“Stevanie Holly, shut up! Sometimes I think you’re the idiotic blonde of the family instead of me! Damn!” Keveney repeated, yanking Stevie down behind the counters. She heard Stevie bounce against the counter, which caused her to hold her breath. Carefully peeking over, she motioned toward Howie and Jillian. “Look!”

“We’re spying?” Stevie mused with an ironic question arching her dark brows. “Last time I tried to ‘check up’ on your social life I was the victim of bright pink hair for at least two weeks...”

“Decided to see if you still kept your registration of super-snooping up to date.”

“You’re not funny in the least bit, Keveney—”

“Just listen!” Keveney growled, peering off to the side of the counter. Sure enough, Stevie quieted so they could both observe the father and daughter. Howie was sitting on the living room floor with Jillian. It was obvious that the boys had dispersed for the time being, wanting to participate in some unsafe activities. So, Howie was left to enjoy his daughter’s company, but Keveney knew that Howie liked that best anyway. So, the two continued to play with a variety of brightly colored blocks filled with little toys that made sounds inside. Jillian was enjoying herself immensely, cupping the blocks with her entire hands to stack and then laughing hysterically when Howie destroyed them for her to start over again.

“Having fun, Jillie Bean?” Howie questioned, holding out a bright purple block containing flowers submersed in water. He smiled when Jillian took it from his hands, shaking her entire body to stir the flowers inside. Leaning, he kissed her forehead with a chuckle. “I love playing with you too, Sweetheart. But—”

“Mama,” Jillian gurgled, seeming to know exactly what her father wanted as she added the purple block to her small tower.

“Yeah… I really wish she was your Mama, because that would mean that she belonged to me, too,” Howie admitted openly, knowing his daughter exactly wasn’t at the age of blabbing his darkest secrets. If anything, Jillian was the best person to speak to when it concerned his love for Keveney. “I’ve got to be honest with you, Jillie Bean. I think God made the perfect woman when Kevie came into this world. And, I finally believed in love at first sight when Kevie took you into her arms while J was having a heart attack. She loved you right from the start. And me, I’m hoping she could love me… I just don’t know how to tell her. I get so nervous inside. She’s just so perfect for us, y’know?”

“Kevie!” Stevie squealed in delight.

“Shut up,” Keveney groaned, trying to remain neutral for appearance sake. Only, she was practically melting inside at Howie’s romantic words.

“So, do you agree with me, Jillie Bean?”

“Dada!” Jillian answered, chewing on the orange block.

“Does that mean you’ll ask her out for Daddy?”

Jillian glanced up from her blocks, tilting her head to the side. Suddenly, she offered a fierce shake.

“No?” Howie countered in shock.

“No, Dada…”

“But we love Kevie, don’t we?”

Jillian nodded.

“Then… Daddy should ask her out?”

Jillian nodded again.

“When?”

“Now!” Keveney suddenly announced, popping up from the counter to hurry into the living room. Stevie had attempted to hold her back, but Keveney had quickly learned to be outspoken when it came to living with such a large family. She knew what she wanted. A bright smile grew against her peaches and cream complexion as the color drained from Howie’s caramel face. She didn’t want to traumatize him. But, it was the question she had been waiting for and she couldn’t let it be lost inside the quandaries of Jillian’s playtime. “You can ask me right now.”

“You’ll go out with me?” Howie questioned incredulously, though his words were monotone in a state of sheer shock.

“Yes,” Keveney breathed with delight.

“With me?” Howie asked, making sure he understood her agreement.

“Howie,” Keveney laughed, kneeling to meet his awkward gaze of disbelief. “Trust me – the answer will always be yes when it comes to you.”

Chapter 23 – The Perfect First Date

“Hurry, Brian, please!” Stevie begged with annoyance, yanking harder on her boyfriend’s hand to pull him into the slowly opening elevator. She didn’t understand why he was being so obstinate today, though she had cut their date dramatically short when she realized Howie and Keveney were going out in about an hour. She would have been perfectly happy with the date, except Howie had called Brian to ask him to place Keveney in a taxi to send to a specific location. It seemed that Howie had spent the entire day scouting a perfect setting for his first date with Keveney in Virginia, only he was coming up short with original romantic ideas. Going slightly insane because Howie thought he was failing Keveney and Brian was useless in consoling the older man, Stevie stole the cell phone to access the situation. She then promised to go back to the hotel to get Keveney prepared, promising that everything would be perfect.

“This is one of those rare opportunities that Backstreet Boys get when we actually have a day off from a hectic tour schedule. A rare opportunity to have a special entire evening out that you’re always complaining about not having with me,” Brian slightly whined, collapsing back against the elevator as Stevie hurriedly tapped on the button for the top floor’s penthouse. They had only finished dinner and Brian had been quite anxious to spend the rest of the evening alone with her. Their relationship had blossomed like a beautiful rose blooming inside the warmth of spring. But, yet again, Stevie had changed the plans like she was known to do.

“But this will be Kevie’s first date in…forever!”

“Forever? You’re telling me that a twenty one year old woman as beautiful as your little sister hasn’t been out on a date in forever? Forever implying what in your mind, Stevanie Holly? Probably about two weeks in beautiful girl time-zones.”

“First off, Mr. Littrell,” Stevie growled protectively, reaching to yank him upward by the silk tie wrapped around his throat. “Jillian is seven months old and Kevie fell in love with Howie the first time she saw him. So, add those seven months to the two previous years when she was hauling ass through her Bachelor’s and Master’s Degree program at the same time… My sister has been off the market for far more than two measly weeks and I resent that stupid beautiful girl time—”

“I get the point!” Brian squeaked, leaning to brush his lips against hers in hopes to quiet her feisty growl. This couple was as diverse as the opposite ends of the polar ice caps. Stevie was serious and sarcastic compared to Brian’s playful comedy. Yet, it seemed to work well, because whenever fire and water mixed, one would create a passionate steam.

“Are you sure?”

“Do I get to kiss you again?”

“Always.”

“Then, yes, I’m sure,” Brian promised, reaching to pull her against him by the waist. He then quickly brought his hands up to capture her face, enticing several more kisses to her sweet lips before the elevator doors opened. He then released her, knowing full well that she’d be yanking him through the hallways to the penthouse doors. And, she did exactly as he expected while hollering for her little sister.

“Kevie!” Stevie continued to call, hurriedly sliding the keycard into the lock until a green light blinked. She then pushed her entire body into the thick door, stumbling inward to find Keveney holding Jillian as she spoke to Nick and AJ frankly in the living room. She was dressed in a pair of black capris and a light lavender halter top that exposed her delicate body to much of the Backstreet Boys’ delight.

“If you make one more lousy bet on me scoring tonight with Howie, I’ll be forced to—”

“DROP THAT BABY!” Stevie hollered, bursting into the living room with her fingers folded into two accusing pointers.

“But she won’t bounce like that catch phrase says…” Keveney trailed softly in a peculiar surprise, turning to catch her sister’s gaze.

“Keveney,” Stevie groaned with contempt, reaching to pluck Jillian away. She knew her sister far too well and had to work against her to ensure a perfect date for Howie. After all, Keveney never seemed to dress up for important events. She was much happier cruising around in comfortable clothing until the big date occurred, not bothering to change despite whatever she might have been doing previously. Dancing, playing basketball, babysitting, working… It didn’t seem to matter to her what she looked like. But it mattered to Stevie, who had become far too accustomed to the smell of sour milk when Keveney arrived home from a long day of work. “Don’t you smell that nasty odor? Do you really want Howie remembering your first date while he’s changing Jillian’s diaper?”

“Well, it’d be a unique impression—”

“KEVENEY!”

“What?” Keveney laughed, “No one will change her but me—”

“Nick will,” Stevie interrupted, causing the tall blonde to glance up from his game system with a raised brow. He looked as if he might object, but Stevie glared sharply toward him with critical blue-gray eyes that actually caused AJ to shiver. Brian had already warned them of her feisty temper and Nick had met with that temper when he broke into Brian’s private bathroom to deliberately flush the toilet while she was showering. “Won’t you, Nick?”

“Yeah, let me go get the stuff,” Nick mumbled, rushing into his bedroom.

“Damn…” Keveney whistled, obviously impressed with her sister’s show.

“Just do me a favor and be on your best behavior tonight,” Stevie returned toward her little sister, holding Jillian outward from her own good clothing as the child babbled happily. “Howie is a great guy and you deserve a great guy. He adores you very much, so—”

“Don’t be myself?” Keveney guessed with a slight smirk.

“Yes!” Stevie returned with excitement, figuring that her sister was agreeing with where her statement would naturally trail. But, after a small moment of question, she furled her dark brows when she realized what Keveney had first said. “God, no! Keveney Marie Moore, I can’t believe that you would think that I wouldn’t—”

“I’m kidding! Jezz, I’ll be you—”

“KEVENEY MARIE—”

“Give me the squirt!” Nick interrupted, causing the natural sibling rivalry to fall into heavy snorts of laughter. He had traveled into his bag of toiletries, covering himself tightly in cellophane wrap and then his bright orange rain gear. He wrapped a handkerchief around his mouth and nose, and then shielded his hair with AJ’s expensive cowboy hat. Long rubber gloves were stretched onto his large hands as he completed his look with brightly colored squirt guns. He looked like a clown version of the HazMat (hazardous material) team. But, Nick didn’t find it quite so funny as he threw his hands onto his hips with a growl, “What is so damn funny?!”

*~*~*

“I’m sorry this is such a boring date…” Howie finally confided with a depressing sigh, glancing toward Keveney with shame as they walked down an isolated portion of the moonlit Virginia Beach. He had spent the entire day trying to elaborate a perfectly romantic and imaginative date, but ended up coming out with the barest essentials. It seemed so dreary compared to what Howie imagined the beautiful Keveney’s love life to be. After all, he wanted something to compliment her and, Lord, did she look elegant and gorgeous that evening. She may have been dressed in plain, normal clothing, but Howie imagined her to be a hidden goddess from the first time he laid eyes upon her. The ocean air seemed to agree with Howie’s assessment, playfully blowing through her twirled golden blonde locks until they layered delicately around her heart shaped face. Her light violet eyes glistened with what Howie imagined to be the secretive gems of the ocean deep. And, like usual, Howie really couldn’t keep his eyes from traveling downward. Her curved body seemed to purr seductively underneath the sleek contours of her form fitting lavender top and tight black capris. Her bare feet wading slightly into the shoreline even seemed to beckon to him as perfection.

But, with all the inspiration exploding from the gorgeous woman, nothing creative leapt from his usually romantic heart.

So, with much disappointment, he could only concoct to lay out a candlelit picnic that complimented the soft white glow of the full moon and twinkling stars. After enjoying some of her favorite foods - a royal feast of chilled Pepsi, cold meatloaf sandwiches, macaroni salad, and chocolate dipped cherries for dessert - Howie suggested they take a walk along the beach. He could only hope that something spectacular would happen on the shoreline to make this memorable, but hope was fleeting as they slowly walked next toward one another, not even touching in the slightest manner.

“Dorough, what are you talking about?” Keveney actually laughed, finally glancing toward the unusually somber man beside her. She had actually been having a lovely time with Howie. Each time she glanced into his smoldering eyes, she found herself falling harder in love.

“This date…”

“What about it?”

“It’s so horribly boring.”

“Excuse me?” Keveney slightly choked, feeling her heart practically crack in two at his disdain. “Why would you ask me—”

“No!” Howie blurted in horror, knowing she had taken it in the wrong direction. He shook his head furiously in hopes she would understand. “I didn’t mean you, I mean me planning this disaster.”

“So you think it’s a disaster?”

“No, yes, I…” Howie exhaled a disgusted sigh, turning again to reach to take both of her hands into his. “I just wanted it to be perfect for you. I wanted to sweep you off your feet and make your heart skip beats like mine does every time I look at you…”

“Howie…” Keveney trailed with a curious smile, stopping him in the wet sand so they sunk slightly. Her eyes glistened with a fresh mist of appreciative tears, but she didn’t bother to rub them away. No man had ever treated her with such adoration before, not that she had time to date anyway. She had been waiting for the perfect man. In her heart she actually believed she had been waiting just for Howie. “Let me tell you something. This is the sweetest, most perfect date that I have ever had. I couldn’t imagine a better night or a more romantic night... Especially not with someone I love as much as I love you.”

“I… Really?”

“Don’t tell my sister, but I really dig this romantic junk. Especially when it’s from your heart.”

“So…” Howie trailed with a somewhat shy smile. “…You love me?”

Keveney laughed with amusement, leaning inward to press a gentle kiss to his now grinning lips. “I’ve loved you for the past seven months. I was just waiting for you to make a move. Didn’t Evie tell you that I process flirting like a guy processes flirting?”

“Well, I couldn’t imagine a more perfect way for you to tell me,” Howie disagreed, reaching to wrap his arms tightly around her body. “And, I couldn’t imagine a more perfect way for me to say I love you back.”

“Howie…”

“I love you,” Howie repeated with a warm smile. He felt her shiver with excitement as he pulled her closer to his own body. The waves were finally starting to lap coolly at their feet as moonbeams caressed their bodies, reflecting their love off the ocean waters. And, with the perfect romantic scene set, Howie tipped her chin gently so he could prove his tenderness and adoration with an earth shattering kiss.

Chapter 24 – Romancing the Heart

“So, what’s the verdict? You stayed out late, woke up late, mismatched your clothing (which you never do), your hair is wild, you almost missed the bus to rehearsals, screwed up every dance move known to God (even the easy ones), and, despite our smartass remarks, you still sit there with that look of a grinning jackass. So, what happened with Kevie to make you look like such a loser?” AJ finally inquired through the silence of their return to the grand hotel and three favorite girls. They had been working practically all morning and half of the afternoon on their choreography and set-up for the two day show in Ohio and everyone was exhausted. Given a few hours of down time without the necessity of public appearances, the boys decided on eating dinner at the hotel and inviting the girls to watch the show. Since Jillian was nine months, it was easier to keep her in the dressing rooms with some of the body guards while Keveney attempted to watch some of the show and Stevie critiqued them. But, many mysteries still remained between the boys concerning Keveney and Howie’s changing relationship. And, unable to do as Kevin said, AJ burst, aching to know the knowledge so he could spread the gossip at the next few interviews. He loved getting Howie in trouble with the media, almost more than Nick.

“I don’t kiss and tell,” Howie murmured, unable to wipe the broad grin from his face. As cliché as it sounded, his first date with Keveney was magical and had quickly progressed the seriousness of their affections. Not that he minded the acceleration, because his romantic emotions for Keveney had been brewing for nine long months. To start as best friends and progress to something more made it an easier transformation. It was just such a release to hold her properly in his arms, knowing that each kiss and caress she provided to his body were his only. And, to think of her would always bring a gentle smile to his face as he counted the seconds to be reunited with her and his gorgeous child.

“Could you sound anymore like a gigantic sissy?” Nick smirked, glancing up from his new handheld game system. They had learned earlier on that staying at hotels father away from the venue sights was in their best interest. They would at least have a forty five minute travel and Nick constantly needed to be entertained, hence the new game system. Of course, Kevin had actually purchased it, mostly to give himself peace of mind from Nick’s constant badgering.

“At least he has someone to sound like a sissy with,” Brian mused with a lopsided grin.

“Don’t even get me started on your twisted relationship, ‘Rok,” Nick snorted.

“And don’t get me started on your triangle of twisted love affairs with Brian and Stevie that would cause Jerry Springer to blush,” AJ snapped lightly toward the youngest, causing his sapphire eyes to widen in shock. Once Nick had been subdued with clever wit, AJ immediately turned back to Howie. “Look, Mr. Latin Lover, we’ve been watching this relationship like a freaking soap opera and as a loyal viewer, I demand the details!”

“Has he been reading your dictionary again?” Howie groaned toward Kevin, who simply shrugged his shoulders and attempted to muffle a laugh. Brian just smirked uncontrollably, sinking back into his own seat to text message Stevie. Rolling his eyes at the uselessness of the other ‘older brothers,’ Howie fixed his gaze back to AJ. “I wasn’t that pathetically desperate for Kevie—”

“Oh yes you were,” the four instantly contradicted with groans of laughter.

“You guys can be such—”

“Ah, ah, ah, D, we nixed those kinds of words when we became Daddies,” Nick tempted with a stereotypical slur in his voice, flicking his wrist to complete the look.

“He’s the freaking Gay Pride Police now,” AJ snickered.

“Guys…” Kevin warned, glancing up from his novel.

“Yeah, J, you’re getting sidetracked from your original topic,” Brian commented.

“Oh…” AJ grinned wickedly. “So what did happen with Kevie on your date, D?”

“Thanks, B,” Howie groaned.

“It’s just paybacks for all the hassles Stevie suffers from her little sister,” Brian laughed, shrugging his shoulders to show he paid no mind to spite.

“We could totally turn that around on Stevie for the countless amount of times that she’s harassed Kevie—”

“Just answer the damn question, D,” AJ demanded.

“How the date was with Kevie?” Howie redirected with a sigh of defeat.

“Yes!”

“It was fantastic,” Howie stated simply.

“That’s it?” AJ scoffed.

“You asked him how the date was and didn’t signify the length of his answer, AJ,” Kevin murmured, never bothering to glance up from the intense pages in his novel.

“And that’s why he needs laid!” AJ growled, gesturing toward Kevin before glaring back at Howie. “And you, too.” Only, Howie didn’t snap back quickly enough with sarcasm, causing AJ’s dark eyes to glitter brightly with delight at the omission. “You and her ruffled feathers all ready?! You’re a damn dog, D!”

“I am not!” Howie groaned, blushing furiously as he sank deeper into his seat. Keveney was quite a passionate woman and he could hardly contain his passion for her, especially after nine years of wanting. She had consented quickly to his needs, reciprocating her own wants and desires within the kisses and caresses she offered to his body. And it truly had been magnificent experience with the cool waves lapping at their burning bodies. He couldn’t have asked for a deeper connection nor a better memory. “We’ve been best friends for nine months, J. Nine long months when I already knew how much I loved her. And it wasn’t ruffling feathers. It was making love. Making love with a gorgeous woman that I’ll forever cherish in my heart. She’s someone I want to spend the rest of my life with, not to mention an absolutely fantastic mother to Jillie Bean—”

But Howie’s explanation was cut short by a peel of curses from their driver, who immediately slammed on the breaks and the horn. Everyone was thrown forward at the sudden jolt, causing a collective round of groans as they fell into the front seats. Each immediately popped upward, glancing out the front window for a source of the stop.

“What the Hell is up, man!” AJ instantly fired.

“Damn airheaded women,” the driver growled, gesturing toward whatever he had almost injured.

“Excuse me?” Brian called.

“Oh, no big deal, we just almost hit a fan…” Nick trailed with a shrug of his bulky shoulders as if nothing too tremendous had occurred, glancing up from his game momentarily to catch the commotion along the outside of the small shuttle bus.

“A fan?” Kevin choked, immediately lurching from his seat. Stumbling just a few steps from the halt of the brake, he pushed forward as he hollered for the shuttle doors to open. “Would you stop the bus before we get sued, how ‘bout it?!”

Nick jumped from his seat as Kevin hopped off the shuttle to check on the dazed girl. His dark blonde brows naturally arched when he caught sight of her, glancing back to the others with a devilish grin. “She’s pretty cute… Can we try for another?”

*~*~*

“Do you know that I am the hottest and most tracked journalist in the United States to date? Everyone wants a piece of this sugar’s talent, Baby,” Stevie announced with a proud grin, glancing up from her recent entry for the music magazine. She tapped her blue French tipped, manicured fingers lightly across the small keyboard of her expensive laptop, smiling with true approval. Writing jointly for her music magazine and the Backstreet Boys had been nothing short of amazing. They had been such a terrific muse that caused her fan base to at least double not only on the presses, but also the World Wide Web. Dozens of fan sites dedicated to Brian’s lady, Stevie, had popped up over night. She was proud of herself, briefly glancing over what she had just written. She considered it a true masterpiece, but wouldn’t brag too much until Brian gave her his opinion (which would be nothing short of golden).

“And so modest, too,” Keveney flared dramatically toward Jillian, causing the little girl to giggle. At nine months, Keveney couldn’t have named a prettier or more adorable infant. She had sprouted an abundance of creamy blonde ringlets that settled just beneath her tiny ears in a pixie style, which seemed to electrify the color of her bright emerald eyes. Her motor skills and vocabulary had even sharpened on the months. Jillian now crawled with ease around the hotel rooms, faster than any of the adults running after her. She drank freely from her personal pink sippy cup, loving it more than she loved her bottle. And she was cheeky, developing a playful personality that everyone found endearing. She had even started on solid food, which proved difficult when Nick was babysitting… But, it was true. Jillian was Keveney’s pride and joy and already considered her daughter among their tight circle of friendships.

“You’re just jealous,” Stevie taunted.

“Of what, you picking on the boys’ fatherhood blunders that I so genuinely call to their faces?” Keveney quipped back without much difficultly, smiling as Jillian disappeared behind Stevie and Brian’s hotel bedroom door. She assumed the child wanted to play peek-a-boo – her favorite game.

“Why must you ruin my thunder, Keveney Marie?”

“Because it’s so easy to rain on your parade, Stevanie Hollie.”

“You…” Stevie fumed in silence, unable to conjure the appropriate artistic words to catch her sister in surprise. After many years of living with her, nothing seemed to compare to whatever improvisations popped out of Keveney’s mouth.

“What’d you write about this week?” Keveney quipped, glancing up to see Jillian toddling backward with a CD case in her mouth. She instantly moved to seize the little girl into her arms, allowing Jillian to present her with a CD.

“Just the normal… AJ and Nick were fighting over a diaper to see who could change Jillian the fastest. Only, they ripped the diaper in half and fell backward. Nick fell onto the baby powder, exploding it all over AJ’s expensive new pants. AJ got hysterical, wrestled Nick to the ground and basically made him a giant version of a Backstreet Baby… Complete with pacifier and cloth diaper. Captured with several photographs!”

“Why does all the chaos always involve AJ and Nick?” Keveney laughed, smiling when she recognized the album art on the CD as the boys’ newest release – Black and Blue. Her philosophical question lingered in the air of laughter as she glanced to Jillian with excitement. “Need some music, Jillie Bean?”

“Dada,” Jillian agreed with a firm nod of her head.

“We’re borrowing your CD, Stevie,” Keveney announced, waving it toward her older sister.

“I think you two listen to that more than me,” Stevie laughed.

“Jillie Bean just loves to hear her Daddy’s voice.”

“Yeah, sure…”

“Excuse me?”

“You know you’re aching to hear Howie’s voice. He’s been gone the whole day and you’re missing him like crazy. You know hearing his singing gives you that little knot in the pit of your stomach as your heart skips a beat. Gives you this burning sensation between—”

“That’d my urinary tract infection, thank you,” Keveney groaned with a laugh.

“You don’t have a urinary tract infection!”

“True… But I doubt you’d want to hear about my sex life… Might make you a little jealous and that’s just not fair to Brian, who’s trying so hard to please your insatiable appetite without resorting to those dirty whips and chains—”

“Keveney Marie—”

“She’s never going to win, Jillie Bean,” Keveney grinned toward the infant, settling her on the baby blanket sprawled in the middle of the floor with her toys and Keveney’s personal affections. Sprawling beside the infant, Keveney pushed the ‘play’ button on the small stereo system she had bought for when she and Jillian took long baths. Keveney had always considered music her life and passion, as did Howie. So, it only made sense that they surround their child with music at every given opportunity. And, much like her family, Jillian had come to adore it also. So, she was pleased when the first track of Black and Blue began to play:

Hi, it’s me! What’s up, Baby? I’m sorry, listen, I’m gonna be late tonight. So, don’t stay up and wait for me, okay?

Jillian instantly wrinkled her button nose, covering her face with both hands at the sound of AJ’s raspy voice. Keveney had to laugh, knowing all the manic faces that AJ constantly made toward Jillian had probably scarred her. She hurriedly clicked to fourth track to appease Jillian’s ears.

“I was always scared of Daddy AJ in that music video, too,” Stevie snickered.

“Ever notice how he kind of resembles a manic clown stirred up on various recreational drug substances?” Keveney mused as the music began to play again.

Baby, when you do the things you do / I wanna be close to you / ‘Cause I need to feel your every move / Baby, I can never say how much / I need your touch / I can’t get enough / ‘Cause you know what to do to turn me on, yeah…

Jillian instantly blew a large, wet raspberry at the CD player, shaking her head furiously at the sound of Nick’s voice. Her emerald eyes locked with Keveney’s soft violet eyes as she puckered her bottom lip. “Dada, Mama!”

“Okay, okay,” Keveney laughed, flipping toward the end of the CD.

You don’t run with the crowd / You go your own way / You don’t play after dark / You light up my day / Got your own kind of style / That sets you apart / Baby, that’s how you captured my heart…

“Dada!” Jillian delighted with a proud coo, clapping her hands at the sound of her father’s beautiful voice.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Howie announced, finally deciding that the boys could enter the living room. He smiled proudly toward his daughter, who instantly squealed for his attention. He waited for her to crawl to him, layering her cheeks with soft kisses.

“Such a show off,” Keveney laughed, reaching to turn off the CD.

“I resent that raspberry!” Nick instantly growled.

“And that manic clown remark!” AJ added. "I hate clowns!"

“You two take things way too personally,” Brian chuckled with approval, sauntering in to fall into Stevie’s arms for affectionate kisses.

“Bye, guys!” Kevin mumbled as soon as he got through the doorway, hurrying toward his hotel room as he concentrated on a piece of paper gripped firmly in his hands.

“What’d Nick do to him this time?” Keveney mused.

“Oh, no, you’ve got it all wrong!” Brian instantly laughed, sitting up in his girlfriend’s arms. “We were coming back from the venue when our driver just slams on the breaks. We all go flying forward because this fan accidentally walked into the street as our bus is coming by. Kevin has a complete bird about getting sued as he runs out to check on her. Only to find out that she’s—”

“Hot as hell!” Nick interrupted.

“…As he so bluntly puts it, really adorable. Kev just went down like an oozing puddle of puppy love. He scored her digits so he could set up a special backstage tour as an apology for the almost killing her fiasco... Her name is Ashley and she’s actually coming to the show tonight”

“That is so romantic,” Stevie cooed proudly.

“I should have had first dibs on her, not the old ape,” Nick scoffed.

“Poor kid,” Keveney laughed, glancing toward Howie with a warm smile. “Did you enjoy practice as much as the others?”

“I enjoyed the part where it ended so I could come home to you,” Howie answered with a grin as he pulled Keveney close to offer a warm kiss to her lips. She purred with delight in response, loosely draping her arms around his neck. She attempted to lean in for another kiss, but Jillian instantly squealed with disapproval. Howie stepped back as Jillian pushed on Keveney’s chest to separate them. He glanced down at his daughter in wonder. “What has gotten into you, Jillie Bean?”

“My!” Jillian growled, gesturing toward Keveney.

“But she’s mine, too…” Howie frowned with hurt.

“No, Dada! Mama my!”

“Guess that beautiful honeymoon is over! Praise the Lord!” AJ cackled before getting ransacked with dozens of thick pillows.

Chapter 25 – My Band of Angels

“I still can’t believe you invited me here,” Ashley exclaimed softly as she seated herself on the couch beside Kevin, fingering the hem of her light pink peasant shirt with an air of sweet nervousness. Her soft brown eyes glistened with appreciation as she glanced around the lavish hotel, feeling as if she were in a fairytale dream. She had met Kevin over three months ago when she had accidentally stepped out onto the street as the boys’ shuttle bus was whizzing by. She had stumbled back onto the sidewalk as a loud horn blared in her ears, stunning her as Kevin hopped off the shuttle to make sure she was okay. It was almost as if he were a knight in shining armor, kneeling down to her and cupping her face in his hands. She honestly felt like it was love at first sight, but the growth of adoration had been overflowing as they continued to communicate. She may have not been present at every interval, but Kevin called her when he reached the various hotels on the tour and after every concert. Some conversations were meaningful, some where just simple and silly, but she felt she had known him all her life. He fit perfectly into her, like a special key in the unique lock of her heart. That’s why she had eagerly accepted Kevin’s offer to fly her to their next destination and spend the weekend with the Backstreet family. But, most importantly, she would be spending time with Kevin.

“Why would you say that?” Kevin chuckled in earnest, handing her the Styrofoam container that held her favorite Chinese food. It was easy to say that Kevin had fallen head over heels in love with the woman sitting beside him and was waiting for the perfect moment to confide his feelings. Having Keveney, Jillian, and Stevie in his life had made him realize what passion he had lost for life. And, the longer he watched Brian and Stevie working together despite their vast differences and Keveney and Howie falling into a deeply romantic love, the more Kevin wanted the same. He deserved to be happy.

“Because… I’ve always dreamed of you and here I am and…” Ashley blushed as she glanced down to her food, feeling foolish as a faint blush crept to her cheeks. “…Sorry…”

“I’ve been dreaming about you, too,” Kevin mused, brushing his fingertips underneath her chin. He was so thankful for the day that he rescued her and believed that God almost pushed her out into the road for a purpose. “Don’t worry.”

“Really?”

“Truly,” Kevin chuckled with approval.

“What do I do in your dreams?”

Kevin leaned closer to confide his secret, cupping her face within his hands. He spoke softly, barely above a whisper, causing Ashley to lean closer to him, their lips merely centimeters apart. “It’s always different, but we’re always in a romantic European setting. Candlelight is flickering all around and I compliment you, causing you to blush. The candlelight glistens off your beautiful light brown eyes and accents the shiny coat of gloss on your kissable lips. I’m holding you close as close as I possibly can and just as I lean in to kiss you—”

“HOLD THAT UNPOWDERED TUSHY RIGHT THERE, YOUNG LADY! Hey! I just gave you an order! JILLIAN LUZ DOROUGH!” Keveney accidentally interrupted with a screech of annoyance, completely oblivious to the romantic sparks kindling between Kevin and Ashley. She barreled down the hallway in a rush, anxious to catch her child before any disasters could occur. She held a large towel in her hands as if she were a bullfighter, waving the bull toward her. But Jillian repelled from the light purple towel, anxiously speeding toward the couple with giggles of amusement. “Daddy leaves you for one second so I can take over and you’re like lightening! You’ve never ran away from me before! Jillian Luz! You’re grounded! Grounded! Grounded! Grounded! Grounded! Grounded!”

“Apparently, you’re grounded, little one,” Kevin laughed toward Jillian as she attempted to grasp onto the couch to stand. She was soaking wet from the bath, soapy bubbles clinging to various portions of her silky skin. Her growing blonde locks plastered against her forehead as her dark emerald eyes glistened with great impishness. At ten months old, the child was already developing an adorable personality. She loved to play and cause a minor amounts of trouble, but always managed to slip out of the consequences when she cuddled up to her parents for protection. And, this time was no different.

“Jillian Luz!” Keveney scolded once more as she tackled the infant within the towel, tumbling onto the carpet as she blew raspberries against the child’s damp stomach. “You know Uncle Kevvy reserved the living room tonight for a date! You’re making me look bad!”

“Never,” Kevin laughed as he reached down to pluck the squirming Jillian from Keveney’s hold. The little girl was still giggling from Keveney’s tickles and raspberries as she curled protectively into Kevin’s arms. She nuzzled her face into his neck, obviously thanking him from saving her from the tickle torture. He had to laugh at her sweetness, gently patting her back as he kissed her soaked curls. “Jillie just wanted to see if her Uncle Kevvy’s new girlfriend. Huh, baby girl?”

Jillian nodded with appreciation as she played with Kevin’s dark locks. “Des.”

“Jillie Bean is an excellent judge of prime girlfriend material,” Keveney agreed, seemingly oblivious to the bathing disaster.

“Lo’ Mama,” Jillian promised as Kevin wrapped the towel around her small body.

“I love you, too, Jillie Bean. You just drive me absolutely crazy,” Keveney sighed as she stood up to press a warm kiss to Jillian’s forehead.

“I’ll get her ready for bed and bring her back to you,” Kevin promised.

“You sure?” Keveney immediately questioned.

“Positive, I want Ashley to officially meet one of the most important women in my life.”

“Alright,” Keveney answered with a grin, nodding a polite greeting toward Ashley. “Then I’m just going to go teach the love of my life a lesson about how not to let our little girl alone in the tub with the shifting of duties when her mother isn’t capable of pulling a flying carpet out of her butt to retrieve the little imp when she decides to bolt.”

“Good idea,” Kevin chuckled as he glanced back to Ashley with a warm smile as there was a yelp of surprise in Howie’s hotel bedroom followed by a loud splash. “I’d like to introduce you to Jillian Luz Dorough, the ultimate love of the Backstreet Boys. The one we always seem to be talking about and don’t know what we’d do without.”

*~*~*

“Mama!”

“I got you Jillie Bean!” Keveney promised with a soft laugh, guiding the child into the cool water. Her warm violet eyes locked with Jillian’s dark emerald eyes, assuring the child that everything was fine. And, slowly, Jillian became comfortable with the feeling of water surrounding her body. A lot more water than a small bath at night. She cooed in surprise, causing Keveney to smile with approval. Given a break from the tour, Keveney and Howie had decided to give Jillian her first swimming lesson. Howie was currently getting some refreshments for the group, so Keveney could play with Jillian. And, like her Daddy, Jillian absolutely adored the water. She immediately started to splash and kick in Keveney’s arms once she realized everything was safe in the arms of Keveney, soaking both of the girls in a matter of moments. Laughing, Keveney took it as the appropriate step to dip lower in the water to almost fully submerse them.

“Oh!” Jillian squealed, her emerald eyes glittering as her lips puckered in surprise at the coldness wetting her tiny body. She immediately glanced up to Keveney, reading her facial expressions to know whether it was safe or not.

“Did you like that?” Keveney laughed harder, standing up in the shallow end as she held Jillian away from her body to kick and squirm. The sweetness exuding from her core caused Jillian to relax immensely, allowing her to play more freely than before with giggles of sheer delight.

“Would you just take her under water now and stop fooling around?” Stevie suddenly called from the lounge area, curling safely in Brian’s arms, far away from the splash zone. She had been invited numerous times to join Keveney and Jillian in the large in ground pool, but Stevie knew better. Any time she was near water with Keveney; she was dunked to the point of drowning.

“Brian, please don’t have kids with her,” Howie voiced with warning as he set Jillian’s juice cup on the table, returning from the hotel room in time to catch Stevie’s motherly advice. And, he shuddered at Stevie’s frankness and recalling those special swimming lessons his brother and father had evoked on him as a child, perfectly happy with Keveney’s gentleness toward Jillian.

“Hey--”

“Now do you se what I went through? She complains all the time about how horrible I was as a child. Kevie always teased me. Kevie always dunked me. Kevie always read my diary to our other siblings for a buck a page when I went out on dates. Kevie always put ice cubes down my underwear when I had boyfriends over. But do you see the truth? I did it all for survival! She’s the devil incarnate. She tortured me!” Keveney exclaimed as Howie finally slid into the water to join his two favorite people in the world.

“At least she didn’t break out the whips and chains,” Howie chuckled with obvious amusement.

“I leave those for you,” Keveney immediately promised with an impish smile, leaning to finally kiss her lover as Jillian splashed wildly at her hip.

“Mmm,” Howie murmured with approval, leaning to nip her bottom lip. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Keveney promised as her heart naturally fluttered at Howie’s kisses.

“Dada,” Jillian finally whined with annoyance when she didn’t hear Keveney’s giggle at her adorable splashing. She had been trying to gather her mother’s attention for several minutes, even pulling at the straps of her bikini. But nothing seemed to work. Her father was selfishly hogging Keveney’s attention and Jillian wanted her more.

“Shh, Dada is trying to get you a baby brother,” Howie hushed his daughter, bending to blow a raspberry on her cheek.

“Woah! Baby?” Keveney wheezed in surprise as Jillian shied away from her father with a disgruntled scrunch of her nose.

“Yeah--”

“No way! Not this woman! I ain’t dropping no baby from that tiny opening!”

“Kevie--”

“I’m officially doubling up on birth control for my Latin Lover,” Keveney whistled, shifting Jillian to hop out of the pool. Not that she didn’t want to have children. In fact, she often dreamed of having several children with Howie. He was a wonderful father and Jillian definitely deserved younger siblings. Having a big family was one of the biggest joys in Keveney’s life. Only, there was no shame in making him work a little for it. Especially if it included a beautiful diamond sparkling on her forth, left digit.

“DADA--”

“I know, I screwed up again, Jillie,” Howie laughed, knowing he’d eventually get Keveney to change her mind.

“Wan Mama!”

“Me, too!”

“No Dada! Me Mama--”

“I was just getting her juice cup,” Keveney scorned with a laugh as she interrupted the father-daughter bickering after returning a few moments later. She bent down to perch herself at the side of the pool, allowing her long legs to dangle freely in the cool water. She then leaned to give Jillian her juice cup, smiling as the little girl sucked greedily and wiggled her fingers at her mother to be held. “Can’t let her get dehydrated.”

“More like you can let yourself get pregnant,” Howie teased good-naturedly, wading toward the side of the pool so Jillian could crawl into Keveney’s lap before she fussed even louder. Once she seemed settled, Howie leaned forward to capture Keveney in a loving kiss, allowing his tongue to gently run against the bottom of her lip.

“And ruin this fantastic figure?” Keveney snorted playfully, unable to stop smiling at his tender kisses. “I don’t think so--”

“Damn straight!” AJ suddenly whistled as a series of flashes exploded between Howie, Keveney, and Jillian. He actually bounced on the heels of his feet before crouching down, angling the camera in such a fashion to capture all the fine curves of Keveney’s sweet body.

“NICK!” Stevie screeched.

“What are you idiots doing?” Howie groaned as he glanced toward Brian and Stevie to see Nick attacking them with a camera as well while Stevie attempted to pull Brian on her body as a shield.

“Well… Honestly?” AJ grinned sheepishly, continuing to focus his expensive camera at Keveney.

“Bluntly is more your style,” Keveney suggested as Jillian buried her face against Keveney for protection from her scary uncle. She briefly leaned to kiss the top of Jillian’s head, rubbing the little girl’s bare back as she shifted to fall into her father’s arms while AJ closed in on Keveney.

“We’re not getting enough profit for t-shirt sales, so Nick and I wanted to make some extra dough with Ebay. Only, his dirty underwear can only get us so far… Especially with that lovely chocolaty coating on the back. So we thought bikini clad Backstreet Girlfriends would give us more of a profit--”

Howie immediately frowned with protectiveness, “You need to get--”

“Half of the profit?” Keveney suddenly interrupted. “Do I get half the profit?”

“Will you take your top off?” AJ egged.

“Sure--”

“KEVENEY MARIE MOORE!” Howie and Stevie hollered at the same time.

“We’ll get those later,” Keveney whispered to AJ with a playful wink, causing Howie to pull her into the pool.

Chapter 26 – Celebrating the Homecoming

“Couldn’t we have gone to some place better?” Nick whined with obvious frustration as he snapped a breadstick in half, unable to rouse Brian into a battle because of Stevie’s verbal chastises. He watched the two pieces fly over the expensive tablecloth, scattering crumbs everywhere. He instantly gazed toward Kevin, figuring to be sharply reprimanded. But Kevin was excusing himself to make an important phone call. Nick smirked, however, knowing the important phone call was an excuse to call the lovely Ashley. Knowing he was off the hook, Nick then grabbed his fork to plunge into his cooling food. But he instantly made a face when he remembered they were celebrating the end of the tour at a private Italian Restaurant that acted as if he were a mutant when he requested pizza instead of some pasta dish. That is, until Kevin smacked him upside the head and he requested the lasagna, but he would have rather had pizza and was looking for an escape. Immediately, he caught sight of his favorite little girl and grinned. “Jillie isn’t a happy camper with this dinner selection. I say... Pizza Hut is still open and my name is practically emblazoned all over their cash registers in all fifty states--”

“Hold your roll, pizza face, Jillie Bean is an angel and loving her meal,” Keveney corrected with an amused smile, reaching over the high chair to dump the bite sized pieces of chicken parmesan onto Jillian’s already empty plate. The growing little girl chirped a coo of obvious delight, reaching with an expert pincher grasp to pop the pieces of chicken into her mouth. She babbled happily with the mouthful of food, holding her sticky hand out toward Keveney to offer a bite of what she found delicious. Keveney obliged, bending down to playfully slobbered the hand with kisses after taking the small bite. Jillian giggled even louder than before, offering a somewhat toothy grin that caused the others to smile as well.

“She’s growing up way too fast…” Stevie finally spoke, watching her little sister interact with the infant. No one would have ever assumed that Keveney was merely the caretaker of the infant and Howie was a type of foster parent. After months on tour, Stevie had finally learned the truth about the situation and respected Howie’s wishes to keep it confidential. It was amazing to say the least, because the three had formed into a special family. And, considering that the tour was finally over, Stevie had to wonder what her sister might do. Tomorrow, they would be flown back to Florida where the boys would receive a well deserved vacation before possibly touring in Europe again or perhaps moving back into the studios for their next album. But the vacation was all they could think about at that very moment and all Stevie could think about was the possibility of getting Brian to herself for several more weeks and perhaps conning her younger sister into taking a semi-permanent residence with her makeshift family.

“She’ll actually be one in two weeks,” Howie agreed, offering the sippy cup filled with fruit punch to Jillian. It was her favorite juice, which she immediately started to slurp down with an infectious grin, keeping her free hand on Keveney’s hand so she wouldn’t dare move away. Howie was always amazed when he watched his daughter, still in somewhat of a daze to realize he had been her father for almost a full year. She was growing into a toddler faster than Howie expected. Her platinum blonde fuzz that had graced her head at birth was finally starting to length, darken, and curl into light honey locks that rested just beneath her pierced ears (courtesy of AJ). The light freckled mark still remained underneath her right eye, but those beautiful emerald doe eyes had grown in depth and personality. Jillian’s personality was playful and happy. She loved to tease those closest to her, but made sure not to overstep her boundaries. She constantly watched Howie and Keveney for facial cues on her behavior, putting Howie’s heart at ease. But most of all, she loved to make Keveney laugh. That seemed to be her primary goal in life, which Howie welcomed freely.

“Does that mean we get to plan a big birthday party?” Stevie questioned almost immediately, her gray eyes exploding with a brilliant electricity of excitement. She even allowed her fork to clatter hard against the exquisite china plate, causing Brian to actually chuckle with amusement. Only, when Stevie squared a hard glare toward him, he shrugged and smiled sheepishly, leaning to brush a kiss onto his cheek. But Stevie brushed away his kiss, causing Nick to snicker.

“Don’t you dare let her be the party planner!” Keveney followed with a threat to her lover, pointing her fork squarely at his chest.

Stevie frowned. “Now wait just a damn--”

“I didn’t even say a word!” Howie exclaimed in surprise, holding his own hands up in defense.

“Bad Dada,” Jillian giggled.

“I distinctly remember my twenty first birthday party involving…”

“No way! That can’t even compare to my twenty first birthday when you had my best friends help you order three old clown strippers who pulled bananas from their G-strings!” Stevie fired back. Brian, Nick, and AJ’s faces turned to stone, knowing if they laughed, they would be slaughtered by the older Moore sister. And, she seemed to sense their amusement, turning on them. “Don’t you dare laugh! I was mortified when she passed those pictures out at my work for Christmas cards!”

“That was the best birthday ever,” Keveney snorted with her own giggle. “And it made a beautiful Christmas Card… Valentines Card… Easter Card—“

“Keveney Marie--”

“I think we should all have a hand in planning Jillie’s birthday,” Howie interrupted, saving his girlfriend from a wrath of tongue lashing.

“I like that!” Brian seconded quickly, wrapping his arm tightly around Stevie’s waist to keep her from jumping onto the table to attack her quirky little sister. “Each of us get to commemorate something special to the birthday for what special gift Jillian gave each of us when she was born.”

“Can my special gift be inviting Ashley?” Kevin announced, overhearing the end of the conversation as he slipped back into his seat. A glowing smile plastered hard against his face, showing how much Ashley’s voice mattered to him. More so, how much Ashley mattered to him. In the past months, their relationship had grown strong. Kevin kept begging for her to accept his invitation to move to Orlando, Florida – permanently. He hoped inviting her for the birthday party would seal the deal.

“How did I know that was coming?!” Nick groaned with a loud snort, causing Jillian’s emerald eyes to widen in shock.

“Yucky! Icky!” she scolded, pointing an accusing finger at him.

“Yucky! Icky!” everyone chorused, following Jillian’s actions.

“Very funny,” Nick scowled.

“Did I mention how much I love this kid?” Kevin chuckled, leaning down to place a kiss on the top of Jillian’s light curls.

*~*~*

The entire clan of friends had just arrived back in Florida about an hour ago and the jet lag seemed to have a horrendous affect when they were just hours away from breaking dawn. Exhausted, Kevin had quickly bid his dues, mostly because he would wake up early to give Ashley a call before she traveled to work. AJ and Nick seemed quite wired from the plane ride, deciding to celebrate their return home with a trip to the nearby clubs in town. Brian had wanted to ride home with Howie and Keveney, but Stevie had insisted he take her home. Not wanting to tempt Stevie’s sharpness that would probably sever his head from his torso with her lack of sleep, he had simply obliged, wishing Howie and Keveney well. Howie, with Jillian dozing peacefully in his arms, motioned Keveney toward the limo that would take the small family home.

As Howie dealt with gathering their luggage inside, Keveney had promised to lay the infant down. She had been given the easier task of the two, or so she thought, because Jillian had curled underneath her blankets without complaint. As long as her warm blankets were curled around her body like a small cocoon and her favorite teddy bear nestled underneath her chubby arm, Jillian was content to sleep through the night. Keveney had even watched for a few moments, smiling as Jillian rolled onto her stomach and popped her little behind into the air before finally falling still.

Satisfied, Keveney released a soft yawn as she pulled her long golden locks into a low ponytail, hurrying down the elegant staircase of Howie’s home. She made sure that her feet were soft and light on each of the stairs, not wanting to rouse any loud noises in chance that Jillian might hear. Once she was on the first floor, she hurried toward the pile of suitcases, easily finding hers wrapped with several yards of duct tape. Heaving it upward against her back with a groan, she planned to sneak off into the early morning darkness, but a pair of arms snaked around her lean waist. Quickly, she released the suitcase as she was heaved upward, causing her to squeal in surprise.

But, the loud squeal was softened on a pair of warm lips, enticing Keveney into the romantic fantasy. She inhaled the soft scent of her boyfriend’s cologne, allowing his tongue to dip into her mouth to stroke hers. The heat of her body actually caused her blood to boil with a deep yearning. Moaning softly with delight, she allowed her arms to wrap around his neck and she deepened the kiss while easily wrapping her long legs around his waist for stability. “Mmm, Howie…”

“What did you think you were doing?” Howie questioned as their long kisses slowly broke into soft, sweet brushes of their lips between words. Carefully, he eased his body backward to the couch, flopping down so Keveney could easily straddle his hips. He refused to let her part from him so quickly, cupping her face in his hands to bring her down for another long kiss. “Trying to sneak away?”

“Jillie Bean’s sound asleep,” Keveney murmured, voicing the facts of the situation as she let her eyes flutter closed to concentrate on the sensation of Howie’s lips against hers.

“Good, that means we get time to ourselves,” Howie suggested, biting gently on her bottom lip which sent tingles down her spine. She always released a soft whine as if it had hurt, but the beautiful smile lighting up her face told Howie otherwise.

“I have to stop by the hospital early this morning to get my schedule,” Keveney somewhat declined, leaning down to catch Howie’s lips again. Slowly, she worked her tongue against his to silence him into a sleepy passion before tilting backward slightly. “My pseudo-maternity leave for Jillie Bean is technically over. Everyone was happy to grant me that maternity leave to help raise Jillie Bean on tour, but I’ve got to get back, no matter how badly I want to be with you right now…”

“We could get you started on a new maternity leave tonight?” Howie suggested hopefully.
“You way too cute,” Keveney groaned playfully, brushing her hands delicately against his face. “But not until I get my big expensive ring.”

“Would you smack me if I called you a gold digger?” Howie groaned back.

“No,” Keveney answered with a shrug of her shoulders, climbing off his lap. “Because I tend to like platinum and silver better--”

Howie scowled, “Kevie--”

“Baby,” she laughed softly, bending down to his sprawled form on the couch to kiss him once more. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too…”

“But I have to go. I’ll have to unpack my things, get some rest, wake up, get a shower, find something to eat, get dressed, go to the hospital, get my hours--”

“Move in with us,” Howie suddenly blurted out of no where. The simplistic words radiated through the quiet house as Keveney stood while her body tensed. The words had obviously surprised her more than Howie had anticipated. He had originally hoped to lull the suggestion into her mind with a romantic evening, but she always had a way of getting him to boldly act without weighing the consequences. So, swallowing carefully, he sat up to reach for Keveney’s hands. “I’d really like you to consider moving in with Jillie and me. We’ve been together for almost a year and we love each other so much. Jillian already thinks of you as her mother and I wouldn’t have it any other way. We miss you way too much when you’re gone… And after having you to ourselves for so many months… I don’t think Jillie and I will fare too well without you by our sides. We need you here. Always. We need you to move in with us.”

“Howie…” Keveney whispered, actually shell shocked into an awed silence.

“It’s not irrational thinking, either. I love you so much, Kevie. So much that I’ll be okay with your piles of clothing spread all around this house. I’ll even let the bed unmade so can jump into it and curl beneath perfection any time you like. I could even stand doing all the dishes, because I know you hate to. As long as it means I get to keep you forever.”

“Baby…” Keveney cooed as Howie stood, leaning to kiss him tenderly. “You really know how to knock a girl out with proposals...”

“I know it’s a big step…”

“A gigantic step.”

“But it’s one I really want to make with you and only you.”

“If you’re trying to get me to spend the night, trust me, you already won that case with a little bonus of loving,” Keveney teased with amusement.

“Kevie--”

“I’ll think about it, Baby.”

“Really?”

“I promise.”

Chapter 27 – You’re My Everything

“He wants you to move in with him?!” Stevie exclaimed in sheer surprise as Keveney confessed the bombshell that had been dropped on her earlier that week, freezing within the middle of the cluttered household she had been attempting to clean. She had expected her sister to come in the house like a whirlwind after working, stripping off her scrubs as she walked back the hallway, donning on some sleepwear, and then scurrying into the kitchen for a source of food. That was typical of the younger woman, especially since she never took breaks at the hospital. But, Stevie had to admit she had been floored when Keveney came in, stated what Howie had offered, and then went on about her business. Not that she didn’t approve of the suggestion, but was frustrated that Keveney acted as if it were really nothing when it meant everything. It seemed like typical Keveney behavior, no matter how much Stevie wanted to throttle the young woman for it.

“Excuse me? What’s with that stressed word of ‘you?’” Keveney immediately accused, narrowing her light violet eyes with obvious disdain. She had brewed over the idea for many sleepless nights, considering her options, finally deciding (with much disdain) to ask Stevie about the subject. Although both girls were hardheaded and Keveney offered a majority of the teasing, she still admired and respected her older sister’s thoughts. Stevie could analyze the situation far better than anyone else in her life. Though, Keveney started to have second thoughts as Stevie snorted with bewilderment, repeating the confession over again as if Stevie were mentally retarded for the time being. “Why wouldn’t he want me to live with him? He loves me and he wants to be with me, which means he wants me to move in with him!”

“Sweetheart…” Stevie trailed with a smirk, swooping into their living room to pick up various items of clothing that belonged to the younger sister. Most consisted of a variety of colorful boxers along with a mixture of CDs, scrubs, various sneakers, and books. She emphasized to the growing load in her hands and then shoved them into Keveney’s arms. “You’re an absolute mess.”

“So what?”

“Howie is far from a slob. You’d drive him insane not even two days into the move. Not to mention you hate doing dishes, you always sleep late, you stay up to ungodly hours, you toss and turn when you sleep, you play your music way too loud--”

“Thanks for the confidence builder there, Stevanie!” Keveney exploded with disbelief. “Glad to know how you think I’m perfect in every way!”

“What?”

“I just honestly thank God you’re not a school counselor like you wanted to be!” Keveney fumed with annoyance, throwing her items to the couch. “You would have had kids climbing up the walls, thinking Armageddon was here because they had a few extra pencil marks on their tests! Damn! I’m not that horrible! And, for your information, Howie doesn’t care about me being sloppy! Not that it’s any of your business! Besides! My messiness makes for a good conversation starter when Brian comes to visit. I can tell him you were with the whole basketball team for a private interview--”

“How you doing, Kevie?” Brian muffled from underneath the pile of clothing that she had accidentally thrown on him without much thought. He had come over earlier after a small meeting with the band and their management, wanting some private time with Stevie. Only, she had been in a fury to clean, so he sat back to watch some TV. That is, until Keveney disrupted their entire process, but she seemed quite skilled in that field so Brian wasn’t too upset. He found the younger woman a true delight, especially when she riled up her older sister.

“Pretty good, you?” Keveney quipped, leaning over the couch to press a kiss to his cheek, acting as she had known he had been there all along.

“Amused to say the very least,” Brian chuckled, pushing the clothing back onto the floor to cause his girlfriend to huff and snort as if she were a wild animal. He immediately held his hands up in defense, knowing not to tempt her temper. “Sorry, Baby.”

“I’m sure,” Stevie growled.

“I am,” Brian protested as Keveney hopped over the back of the couch to sit beside him. “Besides, I think it’d be good for Kevie to move in with Howie. They’d make a great team and Jillian needs her mother to be there all the time. Not just on the weekends or various days throughout the week. It’s not fair to any of them. They deserve to be a family.”

“Brian, you’re supposed to be on my side,” Stevie groaned.

“It’s her choice in the end, Stevie,” Brian attempted to point out.

“Did I mention how much I would love having you as a brother-in-law to help me through her shit?” Keveney opted.

“Shut up, Keveney!” both growled, obviously not wanting to interrupt the argument.

“Or not…” Keveney trailed.

“Besides, like I said before, she still needs my approval, Brian,” Stevie returned sharply.

“Not really--”

“Brian…”

Brian winced and threw his hands up in defeat, “Forget I said anything!”

“Thank you,” Stevie approved as she moved to sit beside her little sister. “Now, Kevie. This is a really big decision that you can’t make lightly. Or on a whim for that matter. It’s not just you and Howie trying to play house. You’ve got Jillian in this deal, too. Are you ready for that? This needs a lot of thought and planning--”

“I’m moving in with Howie!” Keveney suddenly sang, her decision being quickly made as Stevie tried to persuade otherwise. She had been debating about it for many sleepless nights and Brian seemed to add the final push. Excitedly, she threw her arms around Brian’s neck to give him a sloppy kiss. When Brian laughed, she squealed with delight, offering an adorable little dance back the hallway to change. “I’m moving in with Howie!”

“KEVENEY--”

“I LOVE YOU, EVIE!”

“Fine! Good riddance!” Stevie hollered back at her sister, though she knew she had lost the argument. She wished her sister all the happiness in the entire world, but she didn’t want to lose her either. She knew that Keveney would be a terrific full-time mother for Jillian and a wonderful lover for Howie, but what about her own needs? Keveney seemed to be a workaholic and if she lived with Howie; Stevie feared she might never see her little sister again. It was heartbreaking as well as frustrating, because Keveney always seemed to work so hard to go against her wishes. “I’ll be happy to have this place to myself! Without all your boxers everywhere! And you’re music waking me up in the middle of the night! Fighting over who gets the kitchen first! And your midnight cold pizza raids…”

“I STILL LOVE YOU, EVIE!”

“Baby…” Brian called softly with a sad smile.

“She’s leaving me,” Stevie finally sniffled, falling onto the couch beside Brian to become wrapped within his embrace.

“She’s just leaving the nest, not you,” Brian promised, offering a kiss to his lover’s forehead.

“But she’s leaving.”

“It’ll take a few weeks for her and Howie to get everything planned and you’re still allowed to visit. You’re Aunt Stevie, remember? Not to mention one of Howie’s good friends and Keveney’s favorite older sister.”

“Only older sister.”

“That makes you even more special in her heart.”

Stevie attempted to wipe away her tears as Brian kissed her softly. “I’m going to miss her.”

*~*~*

“Howie, where are we going? The guys are going to be at your house soon to start decorating for Jillie Bean’s party,” Keveney explained in confusion as she hoisted the sleeping Jillian against her hip while Howie reached to take her free hand. He tugged her close to his side as they walked further into the dungy portion of lower Orlando, all types of riffraff loitering and eying the small family as if they were a small meal. Keveney felt her stomach knot tightly as she melted into Howie’s protective embrace, keeping Jillian curled close to her body. She pressed a kiss into Jillian’s light blonde locks, feeling the warm breath of the sleeping infant against the crook of her neck. She rubbed the child’s back to keep her in the dozing sleep, refusing to let the child awaken to see the darkness of human potential.

“I need us to do something before we have her party,” Howie attempted to explain, ducking into a familiar alleyway. He held a bouquet of white roses in his opposite hand, knowing that this wasn’t the type of place that he really wanted to bring his child or lover. But, he felt it necessary to do this with both of them. It would only take a moment.

“What are we doing?” Keveney questioned yet again as Howie pulled them in front of a dingy dumpster. It was faded and carved with years of abuse, several numbers plastered over its chipped green paint leading its admirers to the best prostitutes on this side of the street. Heavy dents could be seen against its sides, where cars had swapped paint with it. But, there was an eerie familiarity of it as Jillian curled closer to Keveney, who glanced up to Howie with knowing. “This is where you found her, isn’t it?”

“Exactly one year to this date,” Howie agreed, kneeling down to lay the twelve roses at the foot of the dumpster. He could still hear the labored squeals of Jillian as she was thrown into the dumpster to die. He could even hear AJ becoming hysterical at the idea of Howie chasing the sound. And he would never forget seeing the suffocating infant wrapped in the bloody, plastic bags, begging for even just the tiniest breath of air. He had saved her from death and she had saved him from a meaningless life. Howie felt that he owed it to both of them to commemorate the day as he stood back up and pulled Keveney into his arms. He then leaned over the woman to admire his beautiful child, loving how her lips puckered against her tiny thumb that she suckled softly for obvious comfort. She was adorable and Howie believed that he fell in love with her more every day. “At this point, we were waiting in the hospital to make sure she was okay…”

“And you decided to claim her for your very own,” Keveney continued with a soft awe, turning her face inward to kiss his neck.

“She needed me as much as I needed her.”

“You needed each other,” Keveney agreed as Howie leaned to nuzzle her neck while pulling both girls into his embrace for a closer fit. They each seemed to fall into their own quietness, complimenting the seriousness of the moment. Keveney even allowed the silence for once, listening to the steady beat of Howie’s heart as she felt Jillian’s warm breath. It gave her a soothing comfort to hold and cherish both of them, especially as an uneasiness settled in the pit of her stomach. It was sudden, causing her to tense with bewilderment. It was almost as if something were leering at her family, causing an air of protectiveness.

“Kevie…” Howie finally whispered softly, kissing the side of her neck as he drew himself out of the silence. He was oblivious to her intensity until he noticed her peering down the dark alleyway, as if she were searching for something. “Kevie… Baby?”

“What?” Keveney murmured, shifting Jillian to hold her closer against her chest, wrapping both arms protectively around the infant.

“What are you doing?”

“I…” Keveney blinked rapidly as she glanced up at her lover, realizing that nothing was in the alleyway but them. She feigned some kind of foolish smile, continuing to hold Jillian close just in case. “Nothing… Thought I saw something…”

“Are you afraid of rats?” Howie attempted to tease, leaning in to affectionately kiss the tip of her nose.

“Only if their mutant size…” Keveney trailed as Howie turned to lead them back toward the light. “And knowing this edge of the city and all the testosterone these transvestite prostitutes leak into the sewers…”

“You’re funny.”

“I know.”

Howie chuckled as he pulled her close to kiss the side of her face again, unable to contain his love for her to a mere glance. “You’re also exactly what Jillie Bean and I need to be utterly happy.”

“I’m glad you think that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, because I’m going to move in with you.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Everything’s absolutely perfect now,” Howie concluded with a thrilled grin as he kissed the back of Jillian’s head before turning to offer a sweet kiss to his lover, not realizing what could possibly be lurking in the darkness.

Chapter 28 – Heaven Comes Crashing

“Mama!” Jillian giggled with delight, toddling as fast as she could across the soft grass of the backyard before her father could catch her. Her ever growing curls bounced playfully within her high ponytail as she released shrieks of delight, making sure that her father stayed far enough away from her as she continued to escape. They had been playing in the underground wading pool Howie had installed specifically for Jillian and she wanted her mother. Only, when she had asked for her, Howie started to tickle her mercilessly. So, after wiggling her tiny body free from her father’s hands, she went running in what she hopes would be salvation. Her emerald eyes glittered with sheer delight as she closed in on her mother, who was sitting at the nearby picnic table with her aunts and uncles. They were taking time to celebrate and enjoy Jillian’s first birthday. In fact, most of the fun had just come about watching Jillian play with her new toys and demolish her first birthday cake. Though, Keveney swore that most of the icing had ended up in her ears, nose, and on her face more so than her mouth. She was a beautiful child and a joyful addition to the family. “Mama! ‘Elp!”

“Jillie Bean!” Keveney giggled, scooping up the wet child just as Howie took a spill at her feet. He skidded further than he had intended, practically pushing his body underneath the chair. Both girls shrieked with obvious surprise as they tipped slightly in the chair, but Howie reached to catch the legs before they flipped backward. Keveney blew a huge breath of shock as she stared down at her lover before glancing at her wide-eyed child, shaking her head in disbelief “You and Daddy are trouble makers, Jillian Luz!”

“Des,” Jillian agreed, clapping her hands in triumph as Howie pulled himself up from the usually perfect lawn, though his body had seemed to leave an imprint in that patch of grass. Forever to remain a funny story in their inner circles.

“I thought it was called the terrible twos, not the outrageous ones,” Stevie interjected with a roll of her blue-gray eyes, unable not to laugh at the cuteness of the situation.

“Consider her sources of adulthood,” Kevin chuckled with earnest, removing his hand from Ashley’s in order to motion to Howie and Keveney as they tickled the little girl, blowing raspberries on her small potbelly. The little girl pealed sharp squeals of laughter as she squirmed, never bothering to attempt to get away, because she loved every minute of it. She fit perfectly within her parents’ arms and everyone knew it.

“You’ve got a point…” Stevie trailed with a laugh.

“But you can’t name a sweeter picture!” Ashley instantly chided, smacking her boyfriend’s large shoulder. She was thrilled to have been invited to the small birthday celebration, having no problems taking off work and flying out to Florida. In fact, she had taken several days off in order to spend the week with Kevin, who promised it would be a wonderful vacation. Of course, Ashley didn’t bother to tell him that every moment with him was wonderful, no matter what.

“And she’s got a point,” Brian answered.

“Let’s get out of here before they start squabbling,” Kevin murmured, reaching to grasp Ashley’s hands again to pull her up. Ashley glanced to Stevie and Brian in obvious question before simply shrugging her shoulders, hurrying to meet Kevin’s stride so they could take a dip in the pool.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Brian questioned in bewilderment.

“It means you two argue, constantly,” Keveney emphasized, catching the end portion of the conversation as Howie finally helped situation Keveney and Jillian in the chair. She offered a smile of thanks to her lover, reaching to take his hand into hers for a kiss when he settled in the chair beside her. The giggles slowly died from Jillian as she leaned to select some carrots from Keveney’s plate to nibble on. The bright orange food seemed to attract her as she settled back into Keveney’s arms, offering her one baby carrot before hording the rest for herself.

“We do not argue constantly!” Stevie instantly defended, smacking Brian’s hand away as he motioned to interject. “We are the perfect loving couple.”

“When Brian doesn’t object to the Queen’s rule,” Keveney mused.

“Brian! Tell her she’s lying!”

“Er…” Brian’s color paled as he glared toward Keveney, knowing he was caught. “Thanks a lot, Kevie.”

“And you call Jillie Bean and me trouble makers?” Howie chuckled into his girlfriend’s ear before playfully nibbling on it and kissing it.

“We’re just a family of trouble makers,” Keveney agreed with a shiver of delight.

“A small family of trouble makers.”

“Don’t even start on that.”

“What?” Howie played coy.

“You--”

“Mama, Icky!” Jillian interrupted out of no where, standing on her mother’s lap to pull at her bikini strap. It took only a few moments for the little girl to pull her mother’s attention away from her father. And, when it was all devoted to her, Jillian gestured toward Nick, who was playing aimlessly with one of her new toys. Specifically, it was the soft plastic dolphins that squirted water. As a Floridian child, water and bath toys were always a must for any birthday. Though, Jillian seemed less than pleased that Nick was taking her toys.

“You want one?” Nick asked, catching Jillian’s attention

“Des,” she pouted.

Nick grinned wickedly, squirting a stream of cold water at Jillian. “Here!”

“MAMA!” Jillian shrieked, her lips puckering into a perfect ‘o’ of surprise as she went rigid, squinting her eyes at the splash of coldness.

“Nick!” Keveney instantly scorned, bending to wipe the water away from her daughter’s face. Jillian was less than pleased with Nick’s cruel trick, whimpering as she turned to bury herself into her mother’s arms. Keveney stood to hold and shush the girl’s whimpers, glaring as Nick laughed hysterically over the situation. Howie looked as if he might reach to smack the younger man, but Keveney caught his arm. She offered him a look to tell him that just desserts were in effect. Howie nodded briefly, leaning back in his seat as Keveney snuck a dolphin from the table, perching herself and Jillian behind Nick.

“Ba’, ba’, Icky,” Jillian sniffled.

“Mama will get him back,” Keveney promised softly, holding up the dolphin for Jillian’s view.

“Mama?” Jillian whimpered with question.

“Watch,” Keveney whispered, squeezing the dolphin to make a stream of water hit the small of Stevie’s back, who was still arguing with Brian.

Stevie turned slightly to see Nick continuing to play with the dolphins. Her eyes narrowed as she growled with obvious annoyance. “Nick!”

“What?” Nick questioned in surprise.

“Don’t do that again!” Stevie demanded, returning to her argument.

Jillian clapped her hands over her mouth to smother a giggle, liking what had just happened. “Mama!”

“You do it,” Keveney suggested, giving the dolphin to Jillian.

Squirt.

“Nick!” Stevie yelped.

“What?” Nick responded.

“Knock it off!”

Squirt.

“Nick!”

“What?”

“I’m not playing with you!”

Squirt.

“NICK!” Stevie finally exploded, jumping up from her chair. She charged at Nick, though it took him a few minutes to realize that he was in trouble. Once she was just about to reach and grab him, he fell back in his chair, scrambling against the lawn to run. He attempted to stumble to his feet in order to run, but Stevie caught hold of his swimming trunks. And, with a hard yank, she not only gave the young man a wedgie, but tossed him into the deep end of the pool.

“DAMNIT, STEVIE!” Nick heaved when he surfaced, completely baffled. “WHAT’D YOU DO THAT FOR?!”

“I told you to stop squirting me!”

“I didn’t!”

“Who else would have done it?!”


“ALL ME, MAMA!” Jillian giggled hilariously, clapping her hands with joy that she had finally gotten Nick into trouble.

*~*~*

“Guess she had a good birthday, huh?” Howie chuckled softly as he stepped lightly down the stairs and into the living room to find the two favorite women in his life resting on the couch. Both looked exhausted, their eyes simultaneously drooping as they attempted to concentrate on the Disney movie. Though, they were allowed to rest, because after kissing everyone goodbye, Keveney had hurried Jillian upstairs for a bubble bath. Howie had heard Jillian giggling throughout the entire bath, knowing Keveney had been playing some sort of silly game with her. Then, once she was cleaned from the chlorinated pool water and various blades of grass and other earthly materials sticking to her wet body; Keveney had dressed her in the most comfy of pajamas. The two then sprawled out on the couch with the end portion reclined, Jillian lying on Keveney’s stomach as she sucked milk from a sippy cup.

“She had a very good birthday,” Keveney agreed with a sweet smile, running her fingers through Jillian’s slightly damp curls while Howie took a seat beside her. The birthday party had ended a few hours earlier and it had been a wonderful success. Everyone had enjoyed themselves immensely, maybe for the exception of Nick when Jillian got into trouble. But, everyone else had found that entertaining. And, just like they anticipated, Jillian had been spoiled rotten by everyone in the family, but they wouldn’t have had it anyway.

“I’m going to have to build a whole new room to hold all her new toys.”

“I have no doubt about that.”

“I could add you a special room while we’re at it.”

“I don’t need a special room.”

“Because the bedroom is special enough?”

“And here I thought my sister was just joking about the whole ‘Latin Lover’ persona,” Keveney laughed as Jillian shifted in her arms, dropping the sippy cup between her mother and father. She then turned onto her stomach, resting her head on her mother’s chest, obviously listening to the steady beats of her heart.

“What, you didn’t think I was suave?”

“Awkward was more like it…”

“I’ll remember that,” Howie warned as he noticed Jillian’s eyes droop further until they finally closed. He smiled softly as he leaned forward, gently rubbing the toddler’s back as he pressed a few kisses to her cheeks. “Someone’s ready for bed.”

“Yeah, me too,” Keveney murmured, arching her light blonde brows when she caught Howie’s smoldering eyes.

“I love you so much, Kevie,” Howie whispered, leaning forward to kiss her softly.

“Mmm, I love you,” Keveney moaned softly, moistening her bottom lip when they parted slightly. “I’ll put the baby to bed.”

“Alright,” Howie agreed as they both stood. He noticed Jillian’s eyes pop open slightly from the motion. “Goodnight, Sweetheart.”

“Ni-ni,” Jillian yawned.

“Happy birthday, Sweetheart,” Howie cooed, leaning in to give Jillian birthday kisses. Only, she shied away and pressed her face into the crook of Keveney’s neck. Once she was hidden, Jillian furiously shook her head as Howie pulled back in surprise. “No goodnight or birthday kisses for Daddy?”

“No,” Jillian declined, shaking her head.

“Please?”

Jillian shook her head harder.

“Kevie, tell Jillian to give me kisses,” Howie pouted.

“Jillie Bean, kiss Daddy g’night,” Keveney encouraged the little girl, but she gave Keveney the kisses instead. Keveney smothered a laugh as she watched Howie’s face contort into a look of shock at Jillian’s stubborn defiance.

“Jillian Luz…”

“Mama ‘iss.”

“Then I’m going to give Mama birthday and goodnight kisses, too,” Howie warned with a soft laugh, poking his little girl to elicit a tired smile from her. So, he thought he had her approval as he leaned to kiss Keveney, but found Jillian’s small hand pushing on his chest. “Jillian, you said--”

“Mama my,” Jillian insisted, pushing herself up in Keveney’s arms to give her another see. “My Mama. No Dada.”

“You little--”

“Get ready for bed,” Keveney interrupted with a knowing smile, leaning to kiss Howie’s cheek before taking Jillian upstairs.

“I really hope she grows out of that,” Howie sighed with a chuckle, moving throughout the house to make sure that all the lights and appliances were shut off. He could hear the soft sounds of Keveney’s lullaby floating softly throughout the house and he couldn’t wait to curl up close to her. They had been steadily moving her things into his home and it was starting to fit together. Everything seemed so perfect. So perfect in fact that Howie was considering asking Keveney for her hand in marriage. She had been teasing him for so long about that ‘big honking rock’ that he decided it was time to deliver on that promise. He loved her so much.

But, those thoughts became sidetracked when he came back into the living room to find a purple envelop on the threshold of his front entrance. Furrowing his dark brows with confusion, he bent to retrieve and open it. Confusion settled as he pulled out a birthday card, never prepared for the words that lay inside:

Mr. Dorough,
I saw what you did and I want my baby back. You took her from me a year ago and I miss her. If I don’t get her back by the end of the week, then I’m going to the media. I already have a lawyer and we have no problem causing Hell. My number on the bottom. Call it tomorrow by 2pm and let me know where I can pick up my baby or I make your life so shitty you’d wish you never saw my baby. Oh, and can you give her a kiss from her Mommy, she probably misses me.

Chapter 29 – Matter of Fact

“I don’t understand,” Keveney murmured softly within the darkness of the living room, watching Howie intently study the birthday card that had arrived just hours before, rubbing the back of her cramping neck in a soft circular motion. She still seemed to be floating within a daze of confusion, scared when Howie startled her from her sleep. He had been so pale and diaphoretic, complaining that his heart was nearly about to beat out of his chest. At first she feared it might be a heart attack, but Howie was so health conscious that it didn’t seem possible. Then when he murmured Jillian’s name attached with her birth mother a wave of nausea flooded her body. It was almost as if someone had tossed a bucket of ice water onto her bare body, jarring her away from the peacefulness of normalcy. She longed to go back to bed to forget this was happening, but feared she’d never be able to sleep again.

“She wants Jillian back,” Howie retorted, his voice raspy with pain as he pushed the card onto the coffee table. He then fell back into the couch, covering his face with his hands, feeling the trembles in each fingertip. The woman had been adamant about the destruction she would cause if Jillian wasn’t returned. And it angered him. After a year of life, now she suddenly wanted her daughter? What could she possibly want with Jillian when she so willingly tossed Jillian into two Walmart bags before dropping her into the farthest, darkest dumpster in the most ominous alleyway?

“I know she wants Jillian back, but why does she want Jillian back?” Keveney emphasized with a hard sigh, reading the name scrawled above the number to some dingy hotel in the center of the city. It was the calling card of a criminal. Or perhaps some cheap prostitute strung on a powerful elixir of potent recreational drugs. Amelia Regan. The name was so formal, however. So classy. So uncharacteristic of a woman who would try to purposely kill her newborn. The very thought that the woman actually had the gall to personally drop off a birthday card and demand for the child was sickening to Keveney. She knew where they lived. What was to keep her from stealing Jillian back? Would she be that desperate? A cold chill chased the nerve impulses running down Keveney’s spine.

“Jillian is her child…” Howie attempted to rationalize.

“That she left for dead,” Keveney emphasized, obviously in no mood to play games.

“Keveney--”

“She probably figured out who you were… She wants money--”

“She didn’t ask for money, Kevie.”

“But she threatened you--”

“She just wants her child back.”

Keveney tensed at Howie’s soft chiding, standing from the couch she had been occupying with him. Her small hands balled into fists as she glanced down at her broken lover. She didn’t understand why he was acting this way. It was as if he didn’t even love Jillian. That he had no intention of fighting for her, which set Keveney’s emotions into turmoil. He was so passive. So oblivious. So vague. Her parents had fought for her. Jillian couldn’t be lost into the waste of society. “Why are you being so damn passive?!”

“What do you want me to do, Kevie?” Howie questioned weakly.

“I want you to call her and tell her where she can shove that birthday card!”

“It’s not just my decision--”

“What are you--”

“If she goes to the public, I’m not the only one she’s going to be hurting. My career won’t be the only one ruined. Not to mention the threat of legal action--”

“What are you saying, Howie?”

“I’m saying… I have to call the guys…”

“She’s your daughter.”

Howie nodded slightly, dropping his head in shame as his conscience reminded him of the darkness. Truth be told, Jillian wasn’t his biological daughter. No matter how much he loved her, he couldn’t take back the egregious decision he made to claim her. It was illegal and probably some sickening form of kidnapping. But, the desperation in Keveney’s light violet eyes told him not to say a word. Not that he could do much with his words as Jillian cried out for her parents. Tears immediately flooded his dark eyes as he choked back a sob.

“Mama! Dada!” Jillian announced loudly, feebly shaking the rails of her crib. “Mama! Dada! ‘Elp!”

“You have to promise me that you’re going to fight for her,” Keveney whispered painfully, crouching back onto the couch beside her lover. “She can’t go back to that wretched woman, no matter what she threatens. What she did was illegal. She almost killed Jillian. If she gets her back… I don’t want to think about what would happen. She’d never survive. She’s so innocent… You have to fight for her. Howie, please, fight for her…”

Feeling Keveney’s arms wrap around his neck, Howie was unable to hold back his strangled sob. He immediately embraced her, tucking his face into the crook of her neck as she called to Jillian, promising they would be right up. But Howie could barely hear her over his painful cries, clinging to the warmth his lover provided as he repeated the painful mantra, “She’s my baby girl, Kevie. My baby girl.”

*~*~*

“I can’t believe she wants Jillian back,” Brian finally voiced through the silence of the tense group, the first to speak since Howie had explained their woeful dilemma. He had scheduled a “get together” early that morning, citing that there was a huge Emergency underfoot. They had raced over to find Howie a broken man, unable to hide his tears as he divulged the painful information. Everyone had been thinking the exact same sentiment that Brian first uttered, but none had the strength nor the bravery to say so. In fact, it took all of Brian’s courage to string that simple sentence together. Because, no matter what was decided that day, pain would accumulate. If they gave Jillian back to her mother, their hearts would ache with a tender loss. If they kept Jillian, their careers would be set aflame, legal actions would be taken against them, and there was a chance of losing Jillian all over again.

“I know, but what am I supposed to do?” Howie questioned softly, unable to even glance at his mixture of friends. He had made sure that Keveney took Jillian to the park to play while this conversation occurred. Jillian was a bright child and even at only a year of age knew that trouble was brewing at home. She had demanded to be cuddled between Keveney and Howie while they slept last night. Well, while Keveney and Jillian had slept. Howie had stayed up all night, watching them, burning the image into his memory. Just in case...

“You already know what you have to do,” Kevin answered, his voice deep and grave, matching his dark facial expressions. Brian, Nick, and AJ immediately shifted uncomfortable, turning their gazes elsewhere as Kevin focused on Howie. They knew what was coming was less than supportive of fighting for Jillian. But, damnit… Lord knew that he had no desire to say what he was about to say, but he had to. Their careers had to come first and foremost. They had worked so hard and so long to become successful. Some of them had families to take care of, which required their steady income. They had to protect themselves as heartbreaking as it would be.

“What do you mean?” AJ questioned in confusion.

“Jillian’s mother wants her back… So, give her back,” Kevin stated without any emotion, wanting it to be about logistics instead of morals and emotions. He hoped that would satisfy the others, but they looked stricken at his matter of fact statement. Kevin released a hard sigh. “You may have saved Jillian’s life that night, but you lied when you said she was your flesh and blood. I think that has to be some kind of kidnapping. And if this woman is willing to give you free clearance of any convictions or hassles if she just gets Jillian back in time. Then, so be it. Why put everyone through some messy fight? We won’t win Jillian. This woman is Jillian’s birthmother. We have no right to her.”

Howie winced as Nick’s jaw dropped ajar. “Now wait--”

“Jillian wasn’t Howie’s to begin with, Nick,” Kevin emphasized.

"So she's going back to her mother?" AJ questioned softly. "The one that tried to kill her?"

"Maybe she's changed?" Brian suggested hopefully.

"Don't be so fucking naive," Nick snapped.

"Everyone's upset, Nick, don't take it out on Brian," Kevin chided, turning to Howie, knowing it was better just to do it quickly. As if they were ripping off a Band-Aid. “You know what you have to do, D. I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” Howie whispered with devastation, squeezing his eyes shut to keep the tears from flowing. He had known from the very beginning when he received the birthday card what would have to be done. He had hoped to keep himself in denial, just so he could keep Jillian for awhile longer. But that was impossible. The woman had set demands that he had to follow, otherwise the law would be involved. It was about saving his friends, even if it meant giving up a part of his heart. Wincing at the thought, Howie reached for the phone to dial the list of digits. “…Amelia?”