He didn’t think there was anything lamer than having a religious, I read the Bible before going to bed every night without fail (actually not really, but Nick tends to get very overly dramatic when he's angsty) man rooming with a guy who dreams of a Demon calling him son and have visions of dead people (or almost dead according to Dean Winchester and in a way he was right because Sam and Dean are still alive and he had visions of them, didn't he?) and who most likely would turn evil because apparently, that was his destiny. Fuck destiny, what was being a Backstreet Boy all about then? But there he was, wide a wake in the middle of the night, unsure of what to do now that he had answers. It still seemed too bizarre for him.
"Nick, you need to sleep." And even though Brian had whispered, he had almost jumped out of bed out of fright. And what was Brian thinking, whispering like that in the middle of the night? Was that supposed to make him not jump? Because he almost did just that, and come on, whispering in the middle of the fucking night is creepy.
"You're not asleep either."
"That's because you keep on tossing and maybe you don't know this but these beds creak man."
"Sorry." I'll try to not toss and not think about all those creepy things that are out there. Hookman, poltergeists, fucking vampires man! Oh, and friggin dude that might be under his bed at this very moment. Oh the windows and doors were fucking lined with salt all right, and that was kind of weird and funny, because something that could give him high blood pressure could also help ward off those things that went bumping in the night. It'll help you sleep better at night, Dean had told them, and right now, he felt like going up to their room, knock on their door and tell them that's bullshit, because yeah, his watch just beeped, which means it was already three in the friggin morning and he was nowhere near asleep!
"Actually I've been thinking."
"Don't think that'll help in the trying to fall asleep department Bri."
"I know, I just can't help it, after what we've learnt today, kinda hard to just call it a night and close my eyes you know?"
You know? You know? Of course he knew! He was the one with the crippling migraines and fucking visions! And wasn't it already so messed up that now, now that he thought about it, that his mother was still alive and safe because of her inability to love him unconditionally? So was finding fame and fortune, which led to her turning greedy and self absorbed a blessing in disguise? Was all that suffering he and his family had to endure a twisted sacrifice for her life? He could never win, could he? Have a living, healthy, crazy, estranged mom or burnt, dead and buried mom.
"I mean, we're talking demons here Nick, and they're looking for kids with abilities like yours and it's just...crazy...to even think there's this dark force trying to take over the world."
His 3am brain translated that to: I'm a man of faith, Nicky, and I believe in the power of good and no way, just no way, will God let this happen to our world we live in. And by the way, I'm kind of scared because does this mean you're an evil person because you have powers and the demon wants you on his side?
And dark forces? Star Wars anyone?
"They've been ruling this world for quite a while now Bri, we're just now seeing it in it's pure form." And he thought wasn't it odd that he used the word pure in association with the dark force, so he said, as an afterthought, "well, not pure, pure, but you know, the devil himself, instead of devils in human form, even though the one in my dream is technically a man only he has yellow eyes but he's not really like Saddam Hussein the devil although that would totally rock, cause then we know a noose to the neck will do him in but-"
"Nick, I get what you mean."
"So, you're going to give this a chance right?"
The bedlight went on and he heard Brian shifting in his bed, probably kicking at the blanket. The bed creaked noisily (he didn't think there was ever a time when a bed creaks silently because that's just stupid) and Brian's footsteps followed. He assumed Brian was going to take a leak so he closed his eyes, wondering if he had wanted sleep to come in the first place seeing how he would only dream of that YED (that's yellow eyed demon, keep up with Nick's logic man) anyway and that was just a waste of time sleeping, but his bed creaked and the mattress dented a little to his left and then a hand on his arm and he almost, almost screamed out loud but realised it was only Brian.
"Now this is why people think Backstreet Boys are gays Bri, we need to talk about personal space."
"Please, since when do you, of all people, care about personal space? May I remind you that it was you who licked Howie's forehead."
Heehee, yeah, that was fun. Pissed off, annoyed, I'm going to go totally Spanish on your ass Howie was fun to watch.
"That was fun."
"Yeah Nicky, because licking Howie's sweat is totally normal."
"Why are you on my bed?"
There was a long pause and he was almost lulled into sleep (the guys had that effect on him ever since he was twelve; close contact made him feel safe and with all guards down, he'd fell asleep easily) when Brian cleared his throat and said, "You know I'll be here all the way right? I might have some issues with stuff but that's something I'll have to work out on my own but you don't think a demon will make me go away do you?"
“I don’t know what to think of anymore, but I’m glad you said it, now I know.”
Brian shifted again and the mattress creaked and a friggin spring was now poking at his lower back. He shifted to the left and patted the empty space next to him. “I think there’s enough space for tiny you. Come join me in the staring at the ceiling until sleep comes game.”
Brian yawned. “What about personal space and all that crap?”
“The door’s locked and you’re getting up early, like before the sun goes up early.”
“You used to beg me to come sleep with you in the same bed,” Brian sighed. “Where is that cute little kid I once knew?”
“He grew up and take up all the space on his bed.”
He smirked as Brian chuckled and settled down on the bed. It was big enough for the both of them and it felt nice not to feel awkward having Brian sleeping so close next to him. He didn’t really have any problems with physical contact, he liked them in fact, he had always needed it as far as he could remember. What he didn’t particular feel comfortable about was the emotional contact, when it’s time to talk, when it was time for them to decide they wanted to know and he was expected to tell, to spill it all out as if it was the normal thing to do. He didn’t like it at all, besides the things that he thought about, it might sound perfectly reasonable in his head but they always come out sounding so stupid, so embarrassing, that he hated to be subjected to such ridicules.
“I need you to be sure.” So what the hell was he doing now? The silence had been so much easier to handle and he just had to open his mouth. “You know things are gonna be so screwed after this right? If you get involved, you’re getting Leighanne and Baylee involved too and if it gets dangerous Bri, and I have a feeling it will, it’s going to kill me if something happen to them.”
There was a long pause, too long in fact, that he was beginning to wonder if he had successfully just convinced Brian to back away.
“Nick, you can’t start worrying over everyone now or you’re going to go crazy.”
“Too late for that.”
“I’m serious man. You have more important things to worry about, like really understand what’s going on and what you have to do with those dreams and visions you’re getting. I think we really need to sit down with Sam and Dean and get as much info from them as possible.”
He had thought about that, in fact it had been on his mind for quite a while now. He wasn’t like Sam and Dean, he wasn’t a hunter, he wasn’t raised to kill those things that until today, he thought only existed in urban folklores and mythologies. How was he going to protect himself? How was he going to try and not be bad?
“If a demon can possess anyone, being in public is gonna screw us over so bad man.”
“Hey, we’ll get through this all right? I’m sure there’re ways to protect ourselves from them, we’ll figure it out.”
He would give Brian credit for trying. He knew there weren’t much to hold behind those words, knew it was Brian’s way of calming them both down, because hyperventilating at 3:15 in the morning wasn’t a good idea, at all. And because he really appreciated how understanding his friend was trying to be about the whole mess, he didn’t say anything but nodded his head. Lets believe it would be that simple for just one night. Lets give a little more faith to the good side and call it a day. So he allowed sleep to come and take him away by 3:34 and for the first time in a long time, the YED didn’t come into his dream, in fact, Nick didn’t dream at all and that rocks, big time.
So this is what it looks like if a person had a vision. Now he understood why his friends had that look on their faces after he had one. It was scary as heck. One minute they were talking and having breakfast, swapping visions and places they’d been to (Sam could name all the cemeteries in different cities while Nick pointed out the pubs that Dean could hustle at pool without ending up in some back alley half dead) and the next, Sam was holding his head and swaying on his feet on their way back to Nick’s room.
That tiny part of his brain, the one that Nick referred to as shallow and inconsiderate, was telling him to pay close attention and watch how Sam did it. How even in that kind of pain, Sam was still in control of his own extremities and didn’t go kissing the asphalt seconds after the attack. How Sam had slowly swayed on his feet until he couldn’t stand upright anymore and the other part of Nick’s brain, the thankfully, bigger part, the one that was full of logic and compassion, smacked him right behind his eyes and got him moving. He managed to catch Sam mid way and broke his fall.
Still, it was scary to see Sam’s face scrunched up in pain, how he was trying not to make a sound but groaned anyway, because dude, visions are a bitch and a half, and while they were both healthy young adults, they were allowed to groan in pain without losing any of those manly hood thing. At least that was what Nick thought.
He wasn’t sure what to do now. Well, he figured he should know, and he decided he knew, because he had been in this situation before hadn’t he? So he had a role reversal but it couldn’t be that hard to handle. All he had to do is stay by his side and let him ride it out, because if there was one thing he learnt about this whole stupid vision and having them around his friends, it’d be NEVER to interrupt a guy who was still having attacks of the vision, because then you were just asking for a good kicking in the ass and subject the visioneer (and yeah, that should be a word damn it) to more pain than necessary. He was still upset that he had no recollection of kicking AJ right on the family jewel but he remembered the smacker inflicted on his head when AJ tried to pry his eyes open in the middle of a vision attack.
So he waited, and had a quick scan of the area around them and was glad that everyone seemed to either be back there in the diner or still asleep in their room because well, it was only nine in the morning after all.
He wondered what went on in his friends’ heads when they watched him in the middle of the attack. He wondered if they were as scared as he was feeling now or if they were contemplating if he had faked it and it was part of his plan to get their attention. He still wasn’t sure how Brian had even thought of that. Especially after the whole Paris thing, wanting to be in the middle of any kind of action had never occurred to him.
There was urgency in Dean’s voice as he called for his brother and ran towards them and he had to admit, he was slightly surprised by the reaction. He figured Dean would be used to this by now, to the visions his brother had been having for almost a year now. Dean must have seen them through the window of their room and had bolted a second after, because he had only his jeans on, he smelled of cheap soap which means he just had a shower, the guy didn’t even bother to put on a friggin shirt and yeah, there was this tiny detail of him being barefoot.
Then he felt some kind of warmth, a good kind of warmth, the one that went straight to his heart and fill it up with something good, a kind of high. Dean had dropped everything just to get to his brother, just like the guys had left the comfortable life in L.A; dropped everything and came for him, to be with him, because he surely never invited them, didn’t want to trouble anyone, he was on a goose chase for all he knew, but they still follow him, and surely that showed something.
The fear and worry on Dean’s face was probably the closest thing he could ever witness to what it was probably like for the guys when he had his visions. It hurt him to know that he had caused this and wondered if Sam ever thought of it that way. Then he resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his own stupidity, because well duh, of course Sam had thought that.
Sam was looking at Dean but not really seeing Dean and he marveled at the amount of pain Sam had managed to control in order to do just that. To resist from closing his eyes, from scrunching his face up so bad that the pain doubled, to not passed out. He also noticed his hands reaching out for Dean, to let him know that he heard him, and Dean had responded by holding on tight to his brother’s arms, to give that connection, a lifeline of sort, while Sam sort out the images playing in front of him, swallowing every detail so he could remember them clearly once it was over. Nick understood this very well, the need to remember everything (and then wishing he hadn’t remembered anything because it kept playing in his mind and that was just messed up, because there was only so much time he could stand watching someone getting killed), he wasn’t sure why he wanted to, but he always felt that way, the importance, the urgency to just remember.
And just like it had started, it was suddenly over. He could see now that Sam was seeing Dean, and that look, that expression he wished he could have given his friends after every vision and had them understood what it meant; the ‘fuck, that was intense as all hell and you’re not gonna like it one bit but we can’t ignore it’ look.
“Hey you okay?”
“Yeah, yeah…that was unexpected.”
“Dude when have you ever expected it? You got no control over this man.”
Sam nodded and then as if for the first time, noticed where they were. “Uh Dean, you do realise you have no shirt on.”
“I just got out of the shower man.”
“And that you’re barefoot?”
“Dude I hauled ass because Nicky here looked like he was going to cry seeing you with your shinning, you should be kissing my feet.”
“Hey I wasn’t going to cry,” he jumped in self-defence, and for whatever was left of his manliness. “And it’s Nick.” In times like these, it was easy to remember why he didn’t really like this guy in the beginning.
“Ignore my brother,” Sam advised as he pushed himself up from the ground and then looked at Dean. “And dude, I’m not into feet fetish, at all.”
Dean scowled, “Dude that’s so not funny.”
“It’s a little funny,” Nick couldn’t help saying.
“Well you forty-four hundreds sure have a lame sense of humour,” Dean retorted, although Nick couldn’t trace any malice in his voice. “We need to talk about that vision Sam.”
“I’ll be in Nick’s room and you can come join us once you’re not so naked okay? I think I want to see those sketches again, just to be sure we get everything.”
Dean practically hopped his way back because the asphalt ground was beginning to burn under the morning sun while they made their way down another five more doors before coming to a stop at door 1816, where currently housed the remaining Backstreet Boys.
“I don’t have much time left Nick,” Sam said before he had the chance to open the door. He also thought Sam was telling him that he was dying, because isn’t that what dying people always start with when they wanted to break the news? I don’t have much time left guys, I’m going to die in the next few days so I need to warn you about it. “The vision I just had, I have to go check it out.”
“Cause they’re always tied to the yellow eyed demon.”
Sam nodded, and he understood the lack of words used, because what do you say to that, exactly?
“Hey, you think my visions are tied to the yellow thing too?”
“I’m not sure yet, but we’re going to figure it out before we leave.” And Nick wondered if Sam had meant in a few hours, or in a day, or in a week, and it scares him, because he didn’t think all these could be explained and solved in weeks, let a lone a few hours.