September 02, 2001 Tampa, Florida

Since the moment that Nick had held Zoey in his arms, Tina had noticed a significant difference in him. She knew that it was simply because he had fallen in love with her, much in the same way she had. He had taken a leadership role with the baby in a way Tina had never expected, which she attributed to the fact that he was going to have to leave them in a few days to resume the tour now that AJ was going to be getting out of rehab.

So when their dinner was ready and waiting on the table and Nick was nowhere to be found, she was pretty sure tracking him down wasn’t going to be a challenge. The children had gone down nearly an hour before, and Zoey had been particularly fussy after her last bottle.

Climbing the stairs to the second floor Tina was halfway down the hallway when she heard him singing. A smile stretched across her face as she crept closer to the nursery, and quietly snuck in.

Sitting in a rocking chair next to the window, a sleeping baby tucked safely into his arms Nick was oblivious to anyone else in the room but one tiny person. Tina listened to him sing for a moment and instantly recognized the song as the lullaby Dumbo’s mother sang to him in the Disney movie.

“From your head, down to your toes...” he sang, using his free hand to touch the baby’s forehead, then softly pinch her feet, “You’re not much, goodness knows...” he continued and his voice broke slightly, and Tina realized that he was crying, “but you’re so precious to me, cute as can be, baby of mine.”

 “Nick?” she spoke into the quiet of the room, softly as to not wake the baby.

His eye’s shot up in surprise and he quickly wiped his hand across his cheeks, “I didn’t see you there.”

“Why are you crying?” she asked with her voice full of concern, moving closer to him.

Nick shrugged, “I’m not crying,” he told her in a whisper, getting up to return the baby to her crib. Tina watched as he moved all the stuffed animals to the end and covered her carefully with her small blanket.

“It’s okay to cry,” Tina told him honestly, not knowing why he always felt compelled to put up a front and act macho.

“I just...” he tried to speak but his voice cracked again and Tina watched a wave of sadness cross his face, “How did I ever leave him?”

“Who did you leave?”

“Parker,” Nick whispered, his eyes drifting back down to Zoey, “I don’t remember being in this much pain but I just can’t do it. I can’t pack up my stuff and walk out the door without her. I can’t leave her here.”

Tina tried to give him a reassuring smile and reached out to touch his arm, “I’m going to take really good care of her for you.”

“I know Baby,” he sighed, “I just don’t remember feeling this way last time.”

It had been different before, Tina realized. When she had gotten pregnant with Parker and first told Nick about it he had immediately flown her out to be with him on tour. She spent the majority of her pregnancy on tour then flew home prior to giving birth. That was the last time she saw Nick for months. His career had absolutely exploded. He didn’t have vacation, or even a day off with enough time to get to Cleveland and back so he only had pictures of Parker to satisfy him until he finally met him months later. He hadn’t had the time to think about how much he missed Parker.

“You’ll be okay,” Tina assured him, pulling him to her. She wrapped her petite frame around him and he hunched down into her hug, “She’s not going to remember you not being here. It’s only a couple of months you’ll be back before you know it.”

“I don’t want to go,” Nick confessed, holding her tighter.

“You have a couple of days,” she reasoned, “Enjoy the time you have left then we’ll make sure you don’t miss anything that happens. We can have Skype on over her crib 24/7 if you want.”

“I want.”

Tina had never seen him act this way. She definitely felt as though his desperation was more deep-seeded than simply leaving Zoey behind.

Feeling his lips on her neck Tina rubbed his back, “Dinner is ready and waiting on the table downstairs. I know you’re hungry.”

Nick pulled away and, taking her by the arm, pulled her from the room. He softly shut the door to the nursery behind him then pressed Tina up against the wall, his lips again returning to her neck, “I don’t want dinner, I want you,” he mumbled against her skin.

Tina ran her hand over the back of his head quickly then slowly pushed him away, recognizing a familiar lust in his eyes, “You said you were hungry...”

Almost instantly lust turned to anger, and he gripped her arms tightly, “That was before. This is now. Now I want to fuck.”

Tina couldn’t understand him. In the span of five minutes he had shown three completely different kinds of emotion. He’d gone from sad, to horny, to pissed off without even blinking. She was starting to wonder if maybe he needed to see someone about his mood swings.

“Nick,” she said softly, trying not to wince at how tight he was holding onto her, “I just don’t feel like it.”

“You never feel like it!” he snapped, letting go of her, “Do you know how long it’s been since we last had sex?”

Tina sighed, “No.”

“It was before Christmas!” he exclaimed, running a hand through his hair, “I don’t think you realize how difficult it is to go back to your hotel room, watch porn and jerk off when there’s beautiful women throwing themselves at you in every city!”

With a sarcastic laugh Tina rolled her eyes, “Oh you poor thing!” she couldn’t help but laugh at him before walking away from him to head downstairs and enjoy her own dinner. Feeling him hot on her heels she kept talking, “Given that you can’t seem to have sex without a pregnancy involved just makes me wonder how many illegitimate children you have spread across the planet.”

“I have strong swimmers, I admit, but I haven’t been sleeping with anyone else! That’s kind of a first for me. I want to be with you, I agreed to marry you, and we have children together, so it’s logical that we would have a sexual relationship. I don’t understand why you don’t want to be with me.”

“It’s not that,” Tina groaned. She was tempted to point out that he’d basically said he expected payment for marrying her but she held back, knowing he seemed to be in an emotional mood, “I’ve just been feeling a little self conscious lately. I have been having a really hard time getting rid of the weight I gained while I was pregnant. ”

Nick let out a heavy stream of air and as soon as they’d moved into the kitchen he pulled Tina into a tight hug, “I’m sorry,” he apologized, “I just... when I was upstairs all I wanted was for you to make me feel better. Is it wrong that I want to be with you? I don’t care what you look like you’ll always be beautiful to me.”

His shirt bunched underneath her fingers, “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have made those comments about other girls. I know it must be difficult for you, and I am proud of you for being faithful because I know it’s not something you’ve been very good at in the past. I do want to be with you. I don’t want you being upset about having to leave the kids.”

“Then be with me,” Nick whispered, his lips covering her ear quickly, “be with me,” he repeated again and as he felt Tina’s muscles relax under his hands he knew he was winning. With a hand on either side of her face Nick tilted Tina’s lips towards his, kissing her softly, “I don’t want to go back on tour without having kissed every inch of your body.”

Tina’s arms went around his neck and she kissed him passionately, “I wasn’t that hungry anyway.”

Lifting her up Nick wrapped her legs around his waist and turned back to the stairs in the direction of their bedroom, not able to keep from grinning since again, he’d won.