July 08, 2005 Cleveland, Ohio

After his impromptu drop in Nick bypassed home and took the kids straight to the grocery store. Grocery shopping was something he loathed at the best of times but add in two kids that were tired of being dragged around and starting to get cranky and he wanted to get through the store as soon as humanly possible.

"Daddy what are you going to make for dinner?" Parker wondered, watching as Nick sorted through some ground beef, looking for the right size package of meat.

He found a pound of extra lean and tossed it in the cart next to where Parker was standing, "Spaghetti," he answered, reading the signs above the aisles to find where they kept the pasta.

Parker's face scrunched up in distaste, "You always make spaghetti," he whined and leaned forward against the baby seat where Zoey was sitting.

"You're squishing her, stop," Nick moved him away from his sister, careful to keep the boy’s little feet off the food, "And you love spaghetti, Park!"

The boy shrugged, "I like it better when Mommy makes it. She makes bread."

"I can make bread!" Nick complained. He intentionally steered the cart back towards the bakery section of the store. He made a quick scan and grabbed a silver package of frozen ready-to-bake garlic bread then threw it in the cart, "See? We have bread!"

"Mommy doesn't buy it at the store, she makes it out of real bread," Parker pouted, sitting down in the corner of the cart. He kicked his foot out at the package of bread as though it were offensive and crossed his arms across his chest.

Nick did a quick check around them for curious onlookers and pulled the cart over to the side of the aisle, "Parker," he said in a warning tone, leaning over the side to grab the boy's Converse sneakered foot before it kicked the bread again, "That's enough. We're getting the bread, and we're making spaghetti for Mommy. It's not up for discussion."

Parker let out a loud whine, pressing himself dramatically into the cart, "I don't want yours I want Mommy's! Yours is stupid!" he yelled, kicking out again.

Nick took a deep breath, trying to control his temper. Parker's outburst had set Zoey off and she was now crying from the cart's seat.

"That's a bad word!" Nick told the boy sternly, never having been much of a disciplinarian, "You made your sister cry! We're getting spaghetti and you are going to your room when we get home. That's final."

Nick could feel heat rushing into his cheeks, partially because he was angry and partially because he was embarrassed that people were standing around watching him. He had one kid thrashing around the cart, the other wailing from the baby seat. He couldn’t blame them; he would have done the same thing. Thinking back he could remember many times when he’d glared at parents who didn’t seem to have their kids under control. It was so very different on the other side of the fence.

"Its okay baby, no one's upset," he stroked Zoey's hair, kissing her forehead. It had become so easy to set her off into a fit he was getting used to bringing her back down off the edge.

Once the youngest was settled down to the occasional sniffle and the eldest was stewing at the bottom of the cart Nick started speed shopping. He had it in his head exactly what he needed for dinner and made his was as quickly through the aisles as possible, grabbing the food.

Those were the times that Nick missed having Tina around the most. She always knew what to do when Parker sported an attitude and it was mostly because she knew how to deal with him.  Nick wasn't as confident in dealing with it because he was nervous about going too far. There were many times where he wanted to yell and he had to remind himself that Parker was just a kid and he didn't deserve it.

It was hard though. It was always his first reaction to get angry but unfortunately it was also Parker's. They were two of a kind, he and his son. Parker’s instinct was to yell, hit, and throw things and so was Nick’s. It often put him in an awkward situation of not knowing how far was too far. He didn’t want the first thing out of Parker’s mouth when Tina showed up later that day to be that Daddy yelled at him in the store. So he kept his cool and simply ignored his frustrations with the boy. It was, after all for the sake of his future.

~*~

Nick pressed his hands against the shower wall, taking deep breaths. He had been going over and over in his head what how he was going to act, what he was going to say, so that Tina would know he was serious about their family. He only had one shot at putting things right and he didn’t want to screw it up. It was a tough sell though, it was clear that Tina wasn’t interested in reconciling.

He heard a noise outside of the shower and he cocked his ear to listen. Parker was supposed to be watching Zoey; he’d let the boy out of his room long enough for him to grab a shower and shave. He would have done it that morning but he hadn’t expected a dinner guest.

He heard the noise a second time and poked his head out the frosted sliding glass door, seeing Zoey trying to climb onto the closed toilet lid without dropping Jerome.

“Do you need to use the potty?” he asked, chuckling when she whipped around in surprise, her baby blues wide with shock.

She stuck her thumb in her mouth and shook her head before turning back to the toilet.

“Baby,” Nick laughed, eyeing where his robe was in case he needed to get out of the shower. He had never had issues being naked with Parker when he was a baby but it was different with Zoey, he found it awkward to have her see him naked even though he knew that she wouldn’t remember it and wouldn’t care. It was a girl thing, he figured, “What are you trying to do?”

She continued to struggle to get onto the toilet seat and Nick could almost see it coming; the little muscle spasm in her back, the gasp of air catching in her throat, the shudder, followed by the sob.

“Okay!” he announced, trying to speak over the wailing, “I’m getting out, just hang on for a second!”

He turned off the water and quickly opened the door, grabbing his white terry cloth robe off a wall hook before pulling it back into the shower with him. He tied it up around his waist and got out of the shower, his feet leaving wet imprints on the lush microfiber bath mat.

In a few short steps he reached the girl, pulling her up into his arms, “Shh,” he soothed her, rubbing his damp hand up and down her back quickly. His mother had been trying to tell him to just leave her, let her cry it out and learn that she couldn’t always make him do what she wanted by crying but he had a hard time with it. Her beet red face and sad puffy eyes killed him. He couldn’t just leave her like that.

Her little hands were wrapped in his dripping wet hair and he sighed. He was reaching for his watch to check the time when he heard the doorbell ring through the condo.

“Someone’s here!” Parker yelled down the hallway at the top of his lungs.

“Don’t answer it, wait for me!” Nick called back, trying to think of how he was going to get clothes on, get Zoey to stop crying and get the door simultaneously.

“Daddy I’m gonna get the door!” Parker yelled and Nick immediately started moving through his bedroom with the crying toddler in his arms.

“Do not answer the door!” he warned, hating that Parker seemed to be doing the exact opposite of everything he told him. By the time he made it into the hallway he could hear Tina’s voice and knew that Parker had to have let her in, “Parker!” he snapped, “I told you not to answer it.”

“It’s juss Mommy,” Parker said. As the boy’s eyes rolled Nick’s grew wide, he couldn’t believe the attitude.

“Just Mommy?” Tina laughed from around the corner. The closet door opened and closed as she hung up her jacket and she rounded the corner, curious to know what all the crying was about, “Oh!” she said in surprise, not expecting Nick to be in a bathrobe, “Did I come too early?”

“No,” he shook his head, shifting his weight from one foot to the other uncomfortably, “You’re on time, actually. It’s my fault. I lost track of time in the shower then we started having a meltdown.”

An awkward silence fell over the pair, the only noise being Zoey’s sniffles and cartoons blaring from the television in the living room.

“I should—“

“Do you need my—”

“No, I—“

“I’m gonna—“

Tina simply pointed to the living room, turned on her heel and walked away. Nick let out a deep breath and walked back to his room with Zoey, wondering how they would ever be able to get back to normal when things were so screwed up.