July 09, 2005 Cleveland, Ohio

Dinner had been awkward, to say the least. The kids didn’t appear to notice the tension between their parents as they ate Nick’s spaghetti but the adults could feel it hovering in the room. They each stole glances at one another and spoke about nonsensical topics that really didn’t answer any of the burning questions they had.

Nick had a laundry list of things he wanted to know but none of the questions were all that appropriate for a family dinner so instead he talked about Parker, and Zoey and birthdays and kept the real questions to himself.

He had hoped that they would have a chance to talk after dinner once they had the kids in the bath and getting ready for bed but before the spoon had even dropped on the ice cream sundae he was eating for dessert Tina was getting ready to go. She’d seemed nervous as she kissed the kids goodbye and grabbed her purse and blazer from the hall closet. He got the feeling as though she was too nervous to be alone with him once the kids went to bed. Dinner had accomplished nothing that he had hoped it would.

Nick sighed and stared up at the ceiling in the dark room. His fingers were absentmindedly running through Zoey’s fine hair and she snuggled deeper into his arms, her cheek, pink with sleep, rubbing against the tank top he’d worn to bed. She had come to his room shortly after he’d gotten under the covers, as if she had been waiting for him to lie down. It was typical though, he rarely ever slept alone when the kids were with him. Zoey, for whatever reason, was compelled to be with him during most hours of the day and that included sleeping. It was like she was trying to maximize on her Dad time by keeping the counter running even when she was asleep. Nick didn’t mind though. He wasn’t a big fan of sleeping alone, even if it meant he would be constantly kicked by little pajama covered feet. Whether it was a lover, or his children, he just liked the feel of holding someone while he slept.

There was a knock from outside the front door of the condo and Nick looked over towards the bedroom door, startled. He reached over and grabbed his watch from the bedside table, seeing that it was just coming on seven. He wasn’t expecting his maid service for another couple of days and they didn’t come that early in the morning. There was another knock, a little louder and more urgent this time and Nick sighed, knowing he had to get up and answer it. He slid his arm out from underneath Zoey carefully, laying her head gently on the pillow and placing Jerome where he had once been. She stirred slightly but after a kiss to her forehead she fell back to sleep. He covered her up with the blankets and made his way out of the room and down the hall.

He was only wearing a white tank top and grey boxer briefs so he didn’t swing the door open before taking a look through the peep hole. He blinked a few time to focus his eyes surprised to see that the person on the other side of the door was Tina. She was dressed casually in a pair of form fitting dark wash jeans and a forest green cap sleeved t-shirt with her hair pulled into the same high ponytail she’d been wearing the day before.

Filled with curiosity he undid the door chain and unlocked the dead bolt, keeping himself slightly behind the door as he opened it so he wouldn’t be exposed to whoever else might be in the hallway.

“Hey,” he said, his voice hoarse with sleep. He cleared his throat and ran a hand over his hair to try and tame his bed head while waiting for her to finally speak.

“Hi,” Tina said, finally looking up at him. She was wearing makeup but her eyes still looked tired, “Sorry for waking you up. I think I forgot my cell phone here last night.”

“Oh,” Nick said, his brows coming together in confusion. He hadn’t seen a cell phone when the kids were cleaning up their toys before bed nor had he even seen Tina using a cell phone while she was there, “Well, come in and have a look around for it. Where do you think you left it?”

Tina glanced around nervously, trying not to pay any attention to the fact that Nick was only in his underwear, “Um...living room maybe?”

He motioned her further into the apartment so she could look and followed along, watching as she checked under pillows and on side tables even though they were all places that she hadn’t been the day before, “Did you find it?” he wondered but she shook her head.

“No, I must have left it somewhere--” the distinct buzzing of a cell phone from under her arm interrupted her words and Tina looked at him wide-eyed, clearly caught.

Nick chuckled, “Did you not think to check your purse?” he asked though he was beginning to think that she had ulterior motives for showing up unannounced. To say he was confused would be an understatement. She had practically ran out the door the day before and now here she was at the crack of dawn using a lame, and clearly fake, excuse to get into his condo.

“I guess not,” she said nervously, reaching into her tiny handbag to reveal her cell phone, “It’s my alarm clock,” she admitted shyly, turning the buzzing off.

Nick was fairly certain that if the room wasn’t so dark he would be able to see her blushing, “I guess you’re running a little early then.”

Tina chuckled and nodded, anxiously reaching up to pull her ponytail over her shoulder so she could play with the end. She wasn’t making any move to leave the room and Nick got the impression she was waiting for him to make the next move.

“Do you...” he paused, feeling uncertain before she looked up expectantly, “Do you want a cup of coffee or something?”

“I would love one,” she answered immediately.

“Okay,” he started moving towards the kitchen but noticed that she was still standing frozen in the living room, “Make yourself at home.”

“I’m just going to check on the kids,” Tina called out to him.

His hands were shaking as he put water into the pot and scooped out the coffee grinds but he didn’t know why he was so nervous. It was only a cup of coffee he told himself, trying not to get his hopes too high but he wanted to think that she had come over to apologize to him and ask him to take her back. He knew deep down that wouldn't actually happen, but it was a good dream.

Tina rushing into the kitchen startled him and he jumped, nearly dropping the empty pot before he could put it into the machine, “Where’s Zoey?” she asked and Nick let out a heavy breath.

“She’s in my room,” he explained, “She’s fast asleep. She usually sleeps until 8 or so.”

“I know long she sleeps,” Tina said, her voice laced with defensiveness. With a sigh she apologized, not intending to come off as angry, “When I saw her bed was empty I got nervous.”

Nick laughed, “When she’s with me she doesn’t sleep in her bed,” he told her, pressing the start button on the coffee pot. He turned around and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms across his chest firmly. He considered going to get dressed but at the last second thought that maybe seeing him in his skivvies would remind Tina of what she was missing compared to the weird little guy he'd seen her with at work.

Tina took a seat on a stool at the island in the middle of the room, watching him, “I don’t understand what’s wrong with her. Maybe we need to bring her to a psychologist or something?”

“Our four year old does not need to see a shrink,” Nick scoffed, shaking his head, “I know what’s wrong with her. I have paid enough money to enough doctors to know that she’s messed up because of us. She hasn’t said two words to me in her whole life. She doesn’t need counseling she needs normalcy.”

Tina looked at him sadly, hating that he was the one that had to struggle with Zoey’s problems since the girl was always talkative when she was at home.

“Do you blame me?” she asked. Knowing Nick's past behaviour she could only assume that he didn't take any responsibility for the things that had happened but rather blamed her for ruining everything.

Nick could feel them heading into serious territory. It was the conversation that he had wanted to have the night before. He silently wondered if maybe Tina had wanted to have the same conversation the night before.

“Of course not,” he dismissed, waving her off, “If there’s anyone to blame it’s me.”