“Thanks for lending me the bike,” Mattie told Leighanne since Brian was already gone to work.
“Hey it’s no problem,” Leighanne said giving her a sympathetic smile. “Hey… I am here if you ever need anything.”
Mattie gave her a soft smile, “No wonder Brian loves you… thanks I’ll keep that in mind.” She finished before she began to pedal. She did not know where she was going and she didn’t care that it looked like rain was rolling in as the big cumulus clouds began to invade the blue sky hiding the sun from the earth.
Leighanne watched as she left she sighed heavily. This only made her wonder how Alex had taken the news about being a father. She finally stopped looking toward her she had vanished so she began to walk back up to the house when she heard a car pull up. She turned in time realize it was Alex.
“Is she ok?” he asked as he got out of the car. He had a tired looked on him and he looked tormented.
“Physically?” Leighanne asked she shrugged. “Yeah.”
“Can I talk to her?” he asked as he made his way up to her kissing her on the cheek.
“She’s not here,” Leighanne said casually and Alex stopped on is tracks.
“Where did she go?” Alex asked letting out a sigh.
“I don’t know but she was not going to your house just yet.” Leighanne said as she took a seat on her steps patting the empty side so Alex could sit.
Alex shrugged and honestly wanted to just leave, find Mattie but he obliged; he took a seat beside her. “What are you going to do?” she finally asked him as she heard the thunder begin any hopes of sunshine began to disappear.
He shrugged his arms and then spoke, “I honestly don’t know… I am happy because I am going to be a father yet I didn’t want Sharon to be the one to give me one. I don’t know how much Brian told you about Mattie and me… but Mattie is and always has been the one.” He sighed as he felt the first drop of rain hit his tattooed arm.
“Great it’s about to rain…maybe you should go find her. She borrowed a bike and began her journey down San Jacinto road… I know for sure that leads to the cemetery.” Leighanne said as she stood up and walked up to her door not wanting to get wet.
“Thanks,” Alex said as he too stood up and ran to his car as the drops began to fall more and more constant. He got in and sighed heavily as he turned on the ignition as he drove away from Leighanne’s and Brian’s house.
He sighed as he realized Mattie was fast on the bike. He sped a little faster and sure enough he spotted Brian’s bike just outside the gate of the Clewiston’s only cemetery. By now the rain had gotten steady and he knew he would get wet but he needed to talk to her. Let her know that this did nothing for the feelings he had for her and he was willing to work this out. He took a deep sigh and opened the door; he began to walk knowing where she was. He was already soaked and then he spotted her… his heart parted when he heard her sobs.
“Emmy you shouldn’t have left me… I am bad person. I didn’t deserve to get Evelyn… mom seems to think so and everyone else too. You were the only one to believe me,” she said out loud as she allowed her tears to run freely. The rain hit her and by now she was soaked but she didn’t care she continued to kneel in front of her sister’s grave.
Alex finally walked up to her and kneeled beside her he leaned in and kissed her cheek. “You’re going to get sick,” he told her as he wrapped an arm around her.
Mattie stared at him he was so nice and now he couldn’t be more to her than a friend. When did god decide he wanted to be so mean to her… it was like he was holding a big magnifying glass right at her the sun burning the hell out of her like a kid a bully does to an ant. She leaned into him inhaling deep, he was the one to give her ease and she was going to miss it. “What are you doing here?” she asked finally.
“I think we need to talk and I knew you would be here,” Alex said as he removed a wet hair strand from her cheek.
“I know we do…” she told him wiping her face. She gave him a weak smile and then she kissed him softly. She moaned when she felt Alex wrap his arms around her deepening the kiss… she didn’t stop till she needed to breathe, finally she pulled away looking straight in his eyes. As she did there it was the click in the pit of her stomach that told her she had been blind and in denial about her true feelings for the man in front of her for far to long.
“I spoke to Sharon…” he was cut off by Mattie who again was kissing him with urgency. He didn’t reject her and he kissed her back with just as much ardor.
She pulled away and stared at Alex and then turned to look at her sister’s grave. She sighed and then she looked back at him. “Let’s get out of here…” she told him standing up pulling him up with her. She intertwined her hand with his as they walked away she could see his SUV even if the rain was now coming down hard.
“I am glad I went for the leather seats.” Alex said as he unlocked his car both making a run to get inside. He turned the ignition and heater then on full blast as he pulled out. Nothing else was said they just drove in silence.
*****************
Finally Alex was parked at his house and he sighed… “We have to talk eventually.” He said as he turned off the ignition and stared toward his house.
“I know,” Mattie said as she opened the passenger’s door and ran to the porch; she could hear Alex right behind her she was already knocking on the door hoping Heather would open it.
“Heather is not here,” Alex said as he used his key to open the door. “I gave her a job at the bar and she is over there.”
“Oh that’s good…” Mattie said giving him a small smile. She removed her wet converse shoes leaving them on the porch as she walked into the house the hardwood floor cold to her feet.
“Mattie?” Alex asked as he followed her right into her room he stopped talking when he saw her undressing. He took a deep breath as he saw her… “I’m going to go put on some dry clothes too…” he said and was about to turn to leave when he felt Mattie’s body pushing him toward the door frame kissing him hard.
Mattie stared at him as she began to pull on his shirt bringing it up and over his head tossing it to the floor with her clothes. She gave him a smile as she began to fumble with his belt and then the button to his pants. “Make love to me…” she whispered to him as she kissed him again.
Alex only smiled as he took her mouth again and carried her toward her bed shutting the door with his foot. He knew they should talk first but at this moment he wasn’t thinking to clearly and Mattie was almost naked not helping the situation… “I love you…” he whispered to her as his lips began to explore her body.
********
Mattie looked at the clock on the nightstand it was eight in the night and she was still in bed with Alex right beside her. They still had to talk and she was going to be the bad one again because she was going to let him go. That’s why she had taken advantage of this moment to take this as the best memory of the man she would always love but not be able to have.
“Are you awake?” Alex asked as he kissed her shoulder. “Hungry?” he asked as he nibbled his way up her neck.
“Coffee sounds good right now,” Mattie said sitting up and climbing out of the bed. She grabbed Alex’s now dry shirt and her underwear as she tried to pick her hair up into a bun of some sort.
“Ok coffee it is,” Alex said as he walked out naked and vanished into his own room. Two minutes later he was back with a pair of boxers on.
They walked into his kitchen and he watched as she prepared the coffee. He lit a cigarette as he sat down watching her move around the kitchen. “I like that shirt on you,” he said smiling at her.
Mattie smiled at him as she finally poured coffee into two cups, “Crème?” she asked him.
“Yes,” he said as he watched her.
She went to sit by him and together drank coffee not saying a word… finally Mattie sighed. “I think it’s time we talk.”
“Ok,” Alex said turning to face her. “I should go first then…”
“No…” Mattie said shaking her head. “I think I should go first.” She looked at him one more time and smiled at him. She leaned into him and kissed him passionately and after she pulled away she cleared her throat. “I did a lot of thinking last night after I ran… I think that this is the best option for both us.” She took off the engagement ring and took his hand placing it gently in his hand closing his palm around it.
“What are you doing?” Alex asked confused.
“I am giving you back this ring… the wedding is off. Alex you have a child coming into this world and this child will need you to be there unconditionally. I can’t make nor do I want to make you push the child aside. Besides I saw the look on Sharon’s face… she loves you and now the best thing for you to do is to do the right and marry her.” she told him as she tried not to cry anymore.
Alex shook his head as he heard her… he sighed heavily and laughed bitterly. “I don’t intend to leave Sharon on her own on this… but I don’t love her. You can’t be doing this to me again… Mattie I have always loved you and after eleven years my heart is finally healing and now your telling me you can’t take me like this?” he looked at her hurt.
“Alex listen to yourself…” Mattie said as the first tears began to fall down her face.
“What about what just happened? You can’t deny that we don’t feel the same for each other.” Alex said as he took her hand in his and tried to put the engagement ring back on her finger.
“Alex no,” Mattie said not allowing him to. “I can’t deny and say I don’t love you or that I haven’t realized just how much you mean to me. But that simply isn’t enough for me to ruin you… I think its best I leave and try to concentrate on my niece’s case. You should try and work things out with Sharon… Alex this is a sign we don’t belong together. Maybe in another life but here we are stuck apart for sure, I will take this night in my memory forever.” Mattie leaned in and kissed his temple. “Good bye Alex.” she walked away leaving him there still trying to understand how his happiness was now sadness.
********
Two days ago she had ended everything with Alex yet again… it seemed that Alex was now just in the past. Heather had moved in with her into a hotel till they found a place.
Mattie sat on a table looking through the job section on the Clewiston Gazette. She smiled when she saw that an opening for an English teacher seemed available. It was perfect and what was better was the fact that it was her old school.
“I thought I had recognized you…” Nick said as he came up to Mattie who was busy looking through the paper.
“Nick,” Mattie said in a surprised tone as she stood up to greet him. She had not seen him since the talent show.
“So can I take a seat here with you?” he asked as he flashed his own cup of coffee. “You got to love the Cuban coffee.”
Mattie smiled, “Yeah sure…”
“so your looking for a job?” he asked as he peeked at the newspaper.
“Yeah…” she said biting her lip. “I was seeing that they need an English teacher for this next year at your school.” She said shyly.
“Oh yeah Mrs. Meadows our third grade English teacher finally retired!” Nick laughed a little… “Poor Mrs. Meadows…she finally gave up on the poor kids. She would always get pranked.”
“So they need a teacher for this coming school year?” Mattie asked as she heard him.
“Yep… interested? You a teacher?” Nick said eyeing curiously.
“Yes… well I went to school for this English literature and had to take courses you know. I was working as an assistant for my ex professor back in Wisconsin.” Mattie said proud of her accomplishment. “Do you think you can give me a hand with the principal? I really need this job…”
“Hmm… maybe but what’s in it for me?” Nick said smiling at her.
“A long lasting friendship and lunch on me?” Mattie said giving him a optimistic smile.
“I might be interested… Besides it just so happens that the Principal is my aunt I can definitely persuade.” He said grinning at her. “On one condition…”
“What is that?” Mattie asked as she looked at him. “You go surfing with me this next weekend. It will be fun and bring Evelyn along, my nephew will love her. I kind of take my only nephew out once he is a surfer like me…” he gave her his famous crooked smile.
“I’ve never surfed before and isn’t it dangerous for someone like Evelyn?” She asked him as she realized what he was asking.
“Relax I am professional surfer and I won’t let anything happen to you or Evelyn. So do we have a deal?” he asked.
“First get me the interview… tomorrow with your aunt and then maybe we will have a deal.” Mattie said crossing her arms giving him an impish smile.
“I got even a better one,” Nick said as he fumbled with his phone which only rang twice when a voice answered. “Aunt Jess,” Nick said smiling as he rolled his eyes to Mattie. “Guess what? I got you a very smart English teacher to replace Mrs. Meadows….”
******
August 6, 2010
Time: 3:00pm
Location: Clewiston High School Football field. (I snuck in… I can’t believe they still haven’t fixed that fence.)
I haven’t seen Alex since I left his house. I went straight to the holiday in and never looked back. I called Heather who gladly went and with the help of Brian and Leighanne got all my stuff out of there and into storage. I have managed to find a job thanks to Nick… Nick is my niece’s art teacher and a surfer apparently.
I got the job thanks to him and now I am stuck with plans to go surfing with him. I know what’s going on and I have to lay it him when I can get a chance. Right now men are not my priority… the only man I wanted prioritize is no more than a memory in my head. I know I made the right decision… he needs to dedicate himself to Sharon and his baby.
Heather wasn’t so happy with what went down between me and Alex. “So does that mean he’s available?” She asked the other night making me mad. She was only joking she said but still it hurt. She is going to continue to work with him at the bar and I guess that’s a good thing because when ever I want to know about how he is doing I know she will tell me.
I have also gone to look around at some apartments and they have been pretty nice. But I still have one more place to go before I choose it’s a town home in Bell Glade. Bell Glade is only another little town just fifteen minutes from Clewiston, it sounds like a good idea because it means I don’t have to bump or fear of bumping into Alex. That’s the last thing I want at this moment. I just need time that’s all and I still have some changes to make… for one I have quit smoking cold turkey… maybe that’s why I’ve been in a bitchy mood all day.
I can’t wait for the end of august to come… I will have buy suitable teacher attire because I just don’t think muscle shirts, skinny jeans, and all the stuff I have now is suitable. Thank god I have Leighanne to help me with that, we’ve become quite good friends and the best part is she doesn’t mention anything to me about him…
Well I have to go… I promised Evelyn I would endure dinner at mom’s for her sake. Well I didn’t tell her that part but I did smile and pretended to be excited about it. I haven’t told anyone in my family about my new job and I won’t because I am going to surprise them all when the next hearing comes along.
Mattie.
Chapter End Notes:
Ok here is the next chapter... Hope to hear what you think it really helps me when I get feedback! :)
