For the first time while taping this show, elimination was uneventful. I wasn’t sure if it was because we were slowly filtering out the crazies, or if the crazies that were left were just tired.

Cindy was sent home. She shed a couple of tears and then left without the need of security. Then we got the best news ever.

We all got phone privileges! I felt like I was 13 years old again, and it was apparent by everyone squeals that I wasn’t the only one.

So I was sitting in the living room listening to all of the girls scream over who should go first.

“I should get to go because my mom goes to sleep early,” Candy tried to reason.

Kelsey, of course chimed in, “She’s in the same time zone as us, it’s 5 o’clock, nice try. My best friend, on the other hand just had a baby so I can’t call very late.”

Candy just plopped down on the couch, crossed her arms and pouted.

Brittany walked up to Kelsey and yelled in her face, “Leave Candy alone. I think her mom is a little more important than your skank ass friend.”

“Let me guess, you need the phone to call your AA sponsor?” Kelsey questioned as she put her hands on her hips.

The screaming stopped and we all just looked at Kelsey then to Brittany. Was there something we didn’t know?

“You get drunk at one challenge and suddenly you’re an alcoholic,” Brittany mumbled to herself before speaking again to Kelsey.

“I don’t have time to deal with your bullshit. Someone let me know when the phone is free,” she said as she walked out the room.

“We could just pull names out of a hat?” I suggested.

“Thank god some of us have brains in this house!” Megan said. She then scrambled to grab some paper and scribbled down names. Aspen grabbed a hot pink vase of flowers, emptied it next to the couch before tossing the papers into the vase.

As she pulled papers, Megan listed the names with a dry erase marker on the sliding glass door of a room that until now was empty.

The room was about the size of a bathroom, each wall was neon colored with a matching giant picture of Nick. The border was full of hand-drawn hearts. In the center was a heart-shaped bean bag that sat next to the most hideous phone. It was huge with a rotary dial and covered with hot pink fur.

I saw my name, four from the top and asked Jo, who was ahead of me to let me know when she was done.

I went to the fitness room to grab a yoga mat and walked outside. I was getting so sick of these supposed grown women. I lived in my sorority house for two years in college, and that was a cake walk compared to this. Of course, we were all friends and we weren’t prisoners deprived of technology.

One and half hours of yoga later, I felt amazing. I knew I was going to be sore in the morning. As I sat in the kitchen drinking some water, Jo walked in.

“I’m off the phone now.” She turned to walk out and I jogged to catch up to her.

“Oh thanks, how was it talking to your family and friends?” I asked.

She looked at me then quickly looked away, “It was fine, nothing to talk about.” She turned the corner and briskly walked back to her room.

I guess she didn’t want to share. That girl was strange. I could probably count on one of my hands, the amount of times I’ve heard her speak. I entered the room and slid the door shut. As I sat down I quickly dialed my brother, Andy’s number. What would I do if I didn’t remember the number? Would they not let me call anyone?

It rang a couple times before he answered, “Hello?”

“Hey Andy it’s me!” I was already excited hearing his voice.

“EMMYY! I’ve missed you so! Who knew I would actually miss you?”

“Gee thanks, what have you been up to?”

“Oh you know just this and that. I tried a seaweed facial the other day. Goodness, who cares about me! You’re the one stuck in a house with Hottie McSexy. Tell me everything!”

I was wondering how long it was going to take us to get back to that. Can’t I just pretend I’m in the real world again?

I then told him about all the girls before adding, “I think you would even get sick of the drama here.”

“It can’t be that bad pookie. Just play the game with those girls. How’s my hubby Nick doing?”

I laughed, “You know I don’t play mind games. Nick is very nice.”

“Ohh I know you, that sounds like something happened! Did ya’ll do it already? I know you occasionally can get wild and have fun.”

I groaned into the phone.

“No, we haven’t even kissed. He’s surprisingly really nice, normal and smart. And—“

“And gorgeous! Hit that shit!” He never could let me finish a thought with out interrupting.

“Oh heavens, be quiet. You know nothing is going to happen.”

“And why is that Ice Princess?”

“I’m not an ice princess. I’m just saying that I doubt anything is going to happen.”

“Because you won’t let it?

“What is that suppose to mean?” We were not going to have this conversation right now. This was suppose to be a break from this crazy house.

I heard him sigh, “You know exactly what I mean. Nothing is going to happen, because you’ve already decided nothing is going to happen. You’re heart is like a freakin’ hallway of gates that you completely control who gets in.”

“That’s ridiculous. I’m glad I called to get yelled at.” What I wanted to tell him was ‘get out of my life’. Oh wait, he’s the one that pretended to be me, he obviously wouldn’t understand that concept.

“All I’m saying is that you need to go with the flow and let fate run it’s course”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Mr. Relationship Expert.”

“Don’t get all defensive, dear. This isn’t about me. If it was, I would already be in my French maid outfit dusting that man’s-“

“Stop, I’m getting a visual!” I looked up and saw Landry standing in front of the door holding up a piece of paper that said ‘5 minutes’ on it. I held up a thumbs up and she just rolled her eyes.

I spent the last five minutes listening to more lecturing from my brother. Of course, he thought he knew everything. Last time I checked his last serious relationship was in college four years ago. Hypocrite.

He still thought he was superior in the love department, superior enough to always tell me what I was doing wrong.

I thought talking to someone from my own life would make me happy, but I was just pissed off. I didn’t even care at this point if Nick was going to be outside tonight, possibly waiting for me. I doubted even his boyband charm would do anything to help my mood.

Yes, I was being melodramatic at this point, but I felt like no one understood me. My mother was constantly trying to push marriage and a family down my throat. During the last couple of years, my brother started in on the same. I just wanted them to get off my back. I didn’t need any knight in shinning armor to come and sweep me off my feet. My feet were happy on solid ground. Fairy tales were dumb and just made women unrealistic about life. I liked realistic.

I just stomped off to my room, found my prescription sleeping medicine that I rarely took, popped in a pill and went to sleep.