Chapter 29
Amanda was at the club early with JC the next day, pacing the floors as he watched her.
"I don't know about this JC. He has been so distant lately and I'm afraid this will drive him away more." she said, folding her arms and sighing.
"From what you told me, his health has not been good....doesn't he see that you're only looking out for him?" JC asked. Amanda looked at her feet, ashamed that she couldn't get Nick to believe her. She felt like she was losing him....like Nick was becoming lost and wouldn't find his way back. AJ finally arrived, and the three of them stood there in silence for a while.
"I don't like this idea, Amanda. He's going to be hurt." JC pointed out, frowning.
"I know he will....but AJ said we should try it because he won't listen to anyone. Nick has become so stubborn and he thinks he knows what he's doing...I just want him to be healthy for the show. All he cares about is getting back up on that stage." she said.
"Nick needs to see he's not ready." AJ repeated. JC shook his head in disgust at him as Nick walked in, a cheerful expression on his face. He was a half hour early.
"Hi guys! Ready to start?" Nick said happily, taking out his guitar and tuning it. He looked better than Amanda had seen him in a while, he was so happy she felt horrible for deceiving him. Nick didn't know that this was not a real rehearsal and JC was there in case Nick wasn't able to go on that night. Deep down, Amanda knew he wouldn't be ready. Nick still limped and got tired easily after getting the leg cast off. Amanda worried he wouldn't have the stamina to make it through a whole show on his own.
"Let's do this!" Nick said, grinning as he got on the stage. Skye, Nick's drummer looked at him nervously, and the air in the room became tense as Nick began to play. Amanda was impressed at first. All of the rest had made his voice sound better than before. JC wasn't smiling and Amanda looked at him in confusion.
"He looks tired." JC commented. As he went to the next song...Nick began to sweat and his voice got breathy. He was having trouble holding the longer notes. Amanda looked at AJ.
"He's going to faint, Amanda. Stop him." he said. She looked at Nick, his face flushed with sweat.
"He is going to faint." he replied softly, noticing Nick trying to keep his balance.
"Nick, stop!" Amanda shouted. Nick blinked at her, breathing heavily into the microphone as his chest felt tight. He stared at his friends and knew he had screwed up.
"Who were you trying to fool?" the voice in his head stated, and Nick blinked again, wiping his face.
"Nick, you should sit down and rest." Amanda said, pointing at a stool nearby.
"I'm....I'm fine..." he told her, swaying a little. He felt shaky and dizzy.
"No you aren't. Amanda is only looking out for you...just take her advice. Its about your health." JC pointed out. Nick's eyes narrowed. What they said made sense, but he kept thinking about what his fans were saying...what Brian had told Amanda...everything was becoming too much. All of the voices were intertwining and causing his head to hurt. Nick dropped to his knees, clutching his head as he began to cry.
"Nicky?" Amanda said, leaning in front of him...but what Nick heard was something else.
"Stop it. Stop lying to me!" he shouted suddenly, causing her to jump back. He was shaking and looking at them with hate in his eyes.
"Who is lying to you? You're just not ready to perform yet, Nick..." Amanda said.
"You just want more time with....more time with...HIM." Nick yelled.
"That's not true-"
"Shut up, JC. You like to perform at the club so you don't want me to come back."
"Nick, listen to yoursel-"
"NO! YOU LISTEN!" Nick screamed. Amanda's eyes went wide as she watched him, she had never seen him so upset before.
"How could you do this to me? I thought you were my friends....and you...I thought you loved me.." he said, tears rolling down his face. He felt sick to his stomach, angry....hurt.
"Nick please listen..." Amanda begged, but he had walked out, slamming the door behind him as everyone watched in stunned silence.
"This is your fault." JC said, his face an inch from AJ's.
"Why did I listen to you? He hates me..." Amanda whispered, her eyes on the door.
"He doesn't hate you. Nick is a big boy now, he will get over it." AJ replied.
"AJ, go home and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. JC, start rehearsal...I have to be alone for a while." Amanda said. AJ went home to find Nick at the bar next to the kitchen...a beer bottle in his hand.
"Nick, don't you think you overreacted just a little?" Amanda is just looking out for you." he said as he walked into the room. Nick glared at him and took a large drink from the bottle. There were two six packs on the counter...one bottle was empty already.
"She wants JC there, not me." he said finally, wiping his bloodshot eyes.
"Look at yourself, Kaos. Amanda is looking out for your health and you are pushing all of us away.....stop destroying yourself, its not the answer. I know you have been upset over performing, but-"
"I don't care." Nick said, starting a third beer. He just wanted to be numb....he wanted to feel no emotions. AJ looked at him and shook his head.
"Nick, if you don't want to listen, then fine. I'm going to Brian's." AJ said, heading for the door. Nick wiped his eyes again and looked at the pill bottle on the counter. His head hurt so badly....his heart ached. The pills would make it all better....
Author's Chapter Notes:
Back with another update! Enjoy
