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Chapter Twenty Eight

I was surrounded by cocks. No, not those kind. I was standing in grandma's RV and everywhere I looked in the small little cube, I saw a beady eyed rooster staring back.

"I'm going to spoil you with home cookin'," grandma said. "Cinnamon rolls, chicken and dumplings..."

"G-ma, my trainer's going to kill you," I said. Jasper was standing right behind me grinning ear to ear. I think he was totally amused by the whole rooster thing.

"What your trainer doesn't know won't kill you. You're too skinny."

I rolled my eyes. I felt a tug on the bottom of my hair. I looked up at Jasper, but he looked away.

"Your driver said it's time to get the show on the road," Grandpa Mike said. He climbed the steps, withdrew a gun from his hip holster, and shoved it under the driver's seat. He must have saw the look on my face because he pressed his hands into the soft padded cushion and smiled.

"You can take the letters FBI from a man, but you'll never take his gun," he said seriously. I suddenly felt like I was in an ancient Western movie. Grandpa looked at Jasper.

"Remember those words son."

Jasper held up his hands. "Totally got it, sir."

I gave grandma and grandpa a quick kiss before Jasper and I headed out of the RV. It was just as bad as I imagined it.

"It's never going to make it," I said. "It's going to break down before we reach South Carolina."

Jasper laughed. "We'll just hitch 'er right on up to that there black shiny thing and just drag 'er along."

He had totally gotten all corncob on me. He took one look at my wrinkled nose and burst into laughter.

"You're on your own BooBoo," he said. "See you at the first stop."

Before I could say anything, he squeezed my shoulder and jumped the steps onto the band bus. I heard a whole bunch of catterwaling from inside. I glanced back at the RV. Grandma pressed her face to the (rooster) kitchen window and waved vigorously.

"Brooke!"

Dad had driven me to the dropoff location. I turned. He ran up to me and hugged me tightly.

"I thought you left already!" I said.

"I needed one more hug."

I smiled and pressed my face against his chest.

"I love you, daddy," I whispered. His lips pressed against the top of my head.

"Love you too. Be safe."

We pulled away. He looked concerned; I smiled. "I will. I promise."

Before I started bawling like a little girl, I grabbed onto the bus door and hopped up. The hydraulic 'woosh' told me the door had closed behind me. I made my way to my bedroom.

Uncle Brian always teased dad about sleeping half the tour away. As I fell into the giant soft mattress in my rooster-free room, that didn't sound like a bad plan.

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When I woke up, it was the middle of the night and I was totally confused. I had obviously missed the first stop. Now the bus had just bounced to a rough stop. I saw the flickering light that signaled we had stopped for a recharge.

I crawled out of bed and looked out the window. No one else had gotten our of their bus. I was dying for a Reese's Peanut Butter cup. I knew I probably should take time to comb my hair and wipe the smeared mascara off my face, but I didn't. I shoved my feet into a pair of flip-flops and walked through the bus. I hopped down and did a quick jog to the gas station.

Two minutes later, I had three packages of Reese's and was breaking apart the orange seal on the first one with my teeth, when I heard a laugh. I stopped short.

Jasper was leaning against my bus door.

"You slept through the first stop?" he guessed. I nodded. Feeling like a fool, I spit out the paper that had ripped right into my mouth and feebly held out the package. Jasper pulled it apart all the way. He took one cup for his trouble and handed the other back to me.

I knew there had been a reason I bought three packages.

"Yeah, wha time is it?" I asked around a mouthful of chocolatey goodness. Jasper sucked some melted chocolate off his finger.

"Two a.m. Your grandpa's RV needs to stop like every hour," Jasper said with a grin. "We've already had like twenty stops."

My eyes widened. "What? We can't do this between venues!"

Jasper's shoulders shook. "I've been hearing his conversation with the other drivers. He told them if the RV ever lags behind to just forge forth and they'll catch up."

"Dad's not going to like that. They're going to end up on my bus yet."

Jasper was seriously loving the whole thing. "I think they're already on your bus. Rumor has it your grandpa bugged your bus."

My eyes widened. "What? No way."

"I dunno. He's pretty hard core."

Just then, I heard what sounded like a horn playing 'Old MacDonald.' Jasper and I both turned towards the RV. Grandpa poked his arm out the window and waved.

"He's ready," Jasper interpreted. He took another package of Reese's from me. He gave me a wink.

"By the way...love the hair."

I let out a little squeal and touched my rat's nest as he walked away. With a little huff I hopped back on the bus.

How dare he take my Reese's!

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"You're grandma's an angel," Ricky, my keyboardist said.

"She can adopt us all," Sullivan, my drummist, added.

"We're all gonna get fat," Jasper said.

Jasper was right. We were at the venue and the buffet table had been cleared of what grandma had called 'processed junk.' In big ceramic dishes that would take her hours to wash were fresh batches of scrambled eggs, hashbrowns, and, of course, cinnamon rolls. I reached under my long t-shirt and popped the top button of my jeans.

We were all in trouble. I finished off my third cinnamon roll.

"This is just a first day treat," I declared.

"First day?" grandma laughed. "You think I'm going to let you guys starve the rest of the time?"

A cheer went up from my whole band. I stared at the new platter of cinnamon rolls. I could feel the acne pushing at my chin.

"We all have to stay in shape!"

Grandma waved her hand. "How are you going to have enough energy to wiggle your tush if all you have in your stomach are egg whites and chunks of raw green pepper?"

Jasper laughed so hard he fell off the upside down milkcrate that he had been using as a stool. My face flamed.

"G-maaaa," I whined. She walked over and hugged me.

"What? You've always had a cute tush. Be proud of it."

She walked off, no doubt to get more food. I kicked the bottom of Jasper's foot.

"Shut up!"

Jasper sat up. "So about this 'tush'..."

I stood up and yanked down my shirt.

"What? Some guys like big tushes!" he said with a smirk. "Some girls pay for a tush like that."

"This conversation is over," I declared. "I don't want to hear you say the word 'tush' EVER again." I lifted my chin into the air and headed towards my dressing room.

"Tush!"

"ARGH!"

That was it. I was going to lock myself in my dressing room and pull out all the portable exercise equipment I never used. I was going to get sweaty, shower, and then come out looking like a million bucks.

Jasper would be wishing he could touch a tight tush like mine.

Wait. Why did my mind go there?

"ARGH!" I said again to the empty dressing room. I was back on tour less than a day and already my guy-dar had cranked up. I was going to fight back. I yanked a dumbbell out of my bag, staggered backwards, and then hoisted it up.

"Feel the burn," I whispered to myself. My arm and the bell went crashing back to the floor. I staggered forward and ended up doing an accidental somersault. I heard a knock on the door, but ignored it. I crawled to my gym bag and pulled out a jump rope.

It looked like I needed to start small.