Leah’s Point of View

“Brian, Nick called while you were out and he’s pissed you went golfing without him.” I told Brian as he walked into the office.

“What’s new about that?” He leaned in and kissed me cheek. “How was your afternoon?”

“Boring. Everyone was having fun, so I went over things for the ball.” I commented. I was kind of down.

“Is Eden home yet?”

“No, she texted me saying thy grandmas were taking her to the movies. You know she has them wrapped around her finger.” I smiled  pretending not to feel left out. “Where’s your dad?”

“Watching the news.” He pulled me up close to him. “You know we have some time to be alone.”

His mouth moved to mine. The kiss went from light and hard in an instant. Brian hand’s moved to my waist and he pulled me closer to his hardness. I broke the kiss and backed away.

“What’s wrong Lee?”

“Brian this is not the time or place to be doing this. Your dad is in the living room and everyone will be back soon.” I looked at him. What was he thinking? He was never this frisky when company was here.

“Baby, I want you so bad. How about a quickie? No one will ever know.” He begged.

“Brian, no.” I stated firmly as I moved away from him.

“Ever since you slept with AJ it’s been like this.” He said between gritted teeth. I knew he was mad, but I didn’t care.

“That’s not true and you know it. I really don’t think it’s appropriate for us to be having sex when your dad is all alone watching television.” I snapped. I was starting to feel sick again. I took a deep breath hoping it would go away.

“Whatever Leah. It’s always about you?” His voice grew louder.

“Brian would you just shut up. I don’t think everyone needs to hear us arguing.” I sat down because I suddenly felt dizzy.

“Whatever. You were fine until AJ showed up.”

“Here we go again.” I couldn’t say anything at the moment. I was trying to catch my breath. Brian didn’t even notice. After a few seconds I was able to breathe normally. “This has nothing to do with him. I wish you wouldn’t use him as an excuse.”

“I’m just stating the obvious. I’ll be going with my parents when they Eden for the week. You are more than welcome to come.” He sat down on the desk in front of me.

“Thanks, but I have to work. I can’t take off after the ball.” I really didn’t want to go spend time with anyone. My mood had turned permanently sour in the past couple of days. I want to do nothing but sleep and ignore the world.

--------------------------------

I lay in bed wide awake even though I was exhausted. Brian was snoring softly beside me. He got his way and we made love, then he promptly fell asleep like he always did. Sometimes he was like an old man. Brian was set in his ways. I try to think of him be spontaneous and crazy, but all I do is laugh. He is not that kind of guy.

I couldn’t take it any longer. Sleep wasn’t going to happening any time soon. I gently pulled off the cover, so not to wake Brian. That really wasn’t possible, he slept like a bear. I found my nightgown and put it on. Then I made my way downstairs.

Jackie was in the kitchen making tea. I walked in and grabbed a tin of cookies from the pantry.

“You couldn’t sleep either.” I sat down at the island.

“No. I think it’s because Eden made me drink a venti Java Chip Frappuccino.” Jackie laughed.

“That girl and her Starbucks. I’m sure she had enough coffee to keep her going for days.”

“I wish I had a fourth of her energy. She’s becoming a wonderful young lady. So mature and beautiful.”

“Thanks. She gets her energetic tendencies from AJ. I claim the intelligence.”

“How are things with her and AJ? I know Brian’s mentioned that they weren’t getting along on tour.”

“Things seem to being going good with them since the tour ended. She seems really happy when she’s with him. It makes me happy.” I smiled. All I wanted was for Eden to be a healthy, happy well-adjusted teenager.

“When are you and my son going to give me some grandbabies?” Her question threw me for a loop. I thought she knew that Brian wasn’t able to have kids. I needed to come up with an answer quick.

“We’ve both been so busy with our careers and probably after the wedding we may start trying.” I yawned pretending to be tired. “I think I’m going to head back to bed. See you in the morning.”

I practically bolted up the stairs to my room. I was curious to know why Brian had never said anything to his parents about being sterile. When I entered the room Brian was coming out of the bathroom.

“Where did you go?”

“I couldn’t sleep so I went downstairs.”

“Ahh babe, I missed you being beside me.” He gave me a hug before getting into bed.

“I’m sure you did. I had an interesting conversation with you mom just now.” I sat down next to him.

“Really, about what?” His eyes were closed and he was barely listening to me.

“She asked me when we were going to have kids. Brian, I had to lie to your mother.” I said slightly confused and upset. Brian turned on the light and sat up.

“Say what?” He looked at me, clearly not understanding anything I had told him.

“Your mom asked when we are going to have a baby.”

“Oh.”

“Is that all you can say?” I raised my voice.

“I guess so. What’s the big deal?” He shrugged. I was ready to smack him with a pillow. When did he become so stupid?

“The big deal is you’ve lying to everyone for the past four years. I’m sorry you can’t get me pregnant, but lying to your family is just wrong.”

“I guess I’m wrong then. All the guys in my family can produce a baby and I can’t. It’s embarrassing. I’m a defect.” He yelled.

We heard a knock on the door. “Is everything okay?”

“We’re fine mom. Just go to bed. We’ll see you in the morning.” Brian called out to his mom.

“Okay. Good night.”

 “Damn it Leah, she could have heard us. You and your big mouth.” He glared at me.

“My big mouth. You are yelling just as loud as I am.”

“Bitch.”

“Coward.”

“Do you always have to have the last word?”

“No. That’s reserved to the Almighty Saintly King Brian.” I bellowed. “He always gets his way because he is always right. Be sure to bow down to him.”

“This is ridiculous. Can’t we just get along? I’m so tired of fighting with you.”

“I agree Brian, but you got to tell you family. You know it doesn’t bother me and I love you. You’re parents are going to wonder when we choose adoption over having our own kid.” I explained hoping he would realize that no matter what they were going to find out.

“It’s personal. I know you try to understand but it’s a pride thing, and I’m not ready to tell anyone yet. You don’t have to agree with my decision, but you need to honor it.”

“Fine. I don’t care anymore. The next time she asks, I’m going to tell her to talk to you.” I turned off the light and got comfortable in bed.

I hoped that Brian and I could start to get back to the way things used to be. I was drained from all these arguments we were having. Things used to be easy for us, now it was like we were falling apart. It was scary that we had so many years without drama. Now our relationship was a soap opera. I prayed that things would be better in the morning.