My Breathless Mistress VI

Chapter Twenty-Six

                AJ’s elbow rested on the marble table as he took a sip of his soda. His other arm lied in front of him as he rested against the table. He looked over at Chelsea as she picked at her Salad.  She had been quiet while they ate and he started to wonder if this was a bad idea, maybe she wasn’t ready to be around him yet.  When there was a knock at the door he looked and saw Kevin coming in. 

                “We’re taking Mason down to the peer for a walk.” Kevin told them. “Did Nadia want to go?”

“Can I?” Nadia asked as she looked at AJ and Chelsea.

“Up to your Mom” AJ said as he looked at her.

“I guess so” Chelsea replied.  “If you want to go.”

“Let me just go grab my sweater.” She said as she jumped down from her chair and headed into her room.  When she came back she walked over to Kevin.

“We won’t be to long.” Kevin said as Nadia headed out the door.

“Okay” Chelsea replied as he turned and left.  When the door closed he looked over to her and she looked from the door to him.  She lightly smiled and looked back down to her fruit salad, picked up her fork and began eating again. 

“So” He said trying to break the silence.  “How have you been?”

“Better” She replied. 

He looked at her waiting for her to say more, hoping she would say more.  “Good” He replied with a nod when he realized she wasn’t going to say anymore.

“I can clean up if you want to go.” She said before she took a piece of mango off her fork.

“Well I don’t have to go right now.”

“Oh, well I just figure since Nadia went out you’d want to go.” She said as she picked up a strawberry.

“I couldn’t possibly want to stay here and talk to you?” AJ asked and his tone was surprisingly calm, even to him.

“I dunno” She replied “You haven’t wanted to talk to me all week.”

“I was just giving you the space you wanted.” He told her.

“I know” She replied and then sighed.

“What?” He asked knowing there was more.

She sat there for a minute staring at the bowl.  “I just figured you would have wanted to know how I was doing.”

“I talked to Kevin and Kristin…”

She interrupted him.  “Yeah, Kevin and Kristin.  Not me.”

AJ sat there for a moment.  “I’m sorry, I just thought you were still mad at me for making you come here so…” He placed his hand on her forearm and she quickly pulled away.  Her hand smacked her glass of juice and sent it off the table and spilling onto the floor.

“Crap” She said as she quickly got up and grabbed some paper towel.

AJ watched with confusion, why did she pull away like that?  She stood up and dumped the wet towels into the garbage.  “Chels?” He said as she sat back down but she didn’t look at him. 

She must have known what he wanted to know because she answered without him even asking the question.  “Still a little edgy about my arms. Sorry” She spoke quietly.

“Don’t be.” He replied with a frown and his heart ached a little.  He watched as she cleaned the last of the juice up and then sat back down. “So you’re not mad at me then?”

“At first I was yeah but…” She paused and he tilted his head a little.  “Since I’ve been taking these pills I’m not so drained and foggy so I’m starting to see things clearer now.  I realize why you wanted me to stay here.”

“Are you still hearing your Dad’s voice?” He asked a little hesitantly.

“No” She replied as she lightly shook her head.  “Not sure when the voice stopped but it’s been a few days since I’ve heard anything.”

AJ found himself relaxing when he heard that. “That’s good.”

She lightly smiled and then she picked up her bowl and fork and walked over to the sink.  He didn’t want to get his hopes up and he had seen her pull herself around before only to end up worse than she was.  But he was seeing things in her he hadn’t seen before.  She didn’t seem so fragile, it seemed, like she had said, she was seeing things clearer. 

Letting out a small sigh he thought back to when he called her this morning.  He woke up early and drove out to Kevin’s and went to a coffee shop just in case. He then called to see how things were, and if she needed him to pick up Nadia, he would be right there and wouldn’t take long. He remembered how he felt when she told him about Nadia waking up.  It made him realize maybe the lashing out was more than just his Daughter being mad at him.  She missed her Mom and wanted to be with her. He thought the brunch was a good start but with how quiet she had been, maybe she just wasn’t ready yet. His thoughts were broken when he heard a soft whimper.  He looked at her standing at the sink, her hands resting on the edge of the counter. 

“Chels?” He asked wondering if that was her or was he just hearing things.  She didn’t say anything. 

“I’m sorry” She said softly after a moment.

“For what?” AJ asked as he turned around in his chair.  She didn’t say anything but he could tell she was fighting back tears.  He stood up and walked up to her, he reached up to touch her and turn her around but he stopped his hands, remembering the last time. “Chels?” He said hoping his voice would turn her around but when it didn’t he reached up and lightly touched the side of her upper arms by her shoulders.  To his surprise she didn’t jump so he turned her around to face him and he sighed when he saw her crying.  “Chelsea, talk to me.”

She reached up and wiped her eyes.  “It just feels like I woke up from this nightmare and now everything is gone.  I’m living in a strange house, sleeping in a strange bed and…” She stopped and he assumed she was catching her breath, fighting back tears.  “I miss you and I miss Nadia.”

He stood there looking at her as she wiped her eyes again and he was about to pull her into his arms when she looked up at him.  Her eyes showed sadness and regret but there was a spark to, not the emptiness he saw last week.

“I’m sorry” She said.  “I’m sorry for not being there for Nadia and for you.  I’m sorry I pushed you away, I was just so…” She stopped and swallowed.  “I wanted to get better, I thought I could do it on my own, I just had to make him stop but he wouldn’t.  I got scared, confused and…lost.”  Chelsea took a deep breath and continued.  “I want to get better now, I don’t want to go back there, and I don’t ever want to be like that again, no matter how much losing Logan hurts.”

A light smile broke from his lips and he pulled her into his arms.  It had been to long since he held her like this. To long since her hair had brush against his cheek and he could smell the sent from it.  “I’ve been taking my pills every morning.  I’ve been talking to the Doctors and working on getting past this, I’ve been sleeping and…”

He interrupted her. “Do you want to come home?” He asked.

“Yes” She replied in a whisper with a light nod.  “But-But only if you want me too, I know why you wanted me to stay here and…”

He interrupted her again as he slowly pulled her away.  “Chels.” His eyes locked on hers.  “I want you to come home if you’re ready to come home.”

“I am” She replied with a quick nod.

“Then why don’t you start packing your things up and when Nadia get’s back we’ll let them know and head home.”  He told her.  “Sound good?”

When Chelsea lightly nodded he smiled as she headed towards her room.  “Chels?”

She stopped and turned and looked at him.  He walked up to her and locked his eyes on hers.  Then slowly almost studying her reaction he leaned in and when she showed no signs of pulling away, he kissed her.  His fingers drifted along the side of her face as he reached up and slid his fingers through her hair.  The kiss was long and passionate, it had to be, it had a whole weeks worth to make up for.

Slowly he pulled away and rested his forehead against hers.  “I love you so much Chelsea.”

“I love you too Alex.” She replied

He let her go to her room so she could get her things together and walked over to the couch.  When he sat down he looked up at the open door and saw her putting cloths onto the bed.  A thought, a question popped into his head and he looked at her. 

“Hey Chels?”

“Yeah?” She said as she stopped at her door.

“Are you sure you’ll be ok going back?” He asked.  “What happens when you see the nursery?”

“It’s one of the reasons I want to go back, I need to deal with the memories, with the room because if I don’t…” She paused.   “Logan dying wasn’t the end of everything.” She said and he looked at her.  “There’s still you and Nadia.”

“Okay” He replied with a light smile, she lightly smiled back, and then returned to her packing.  AJ didn’t show the joy that refilled his heart.  He knew she was going to be okay, she still had some ways to go but he knew she would get through it, she wanted to get through it, and he wanted to be there to help her.

He sat on the couch quietly watching her was she walked back and forth in her room.  She walked out of the room and into the bathroom a couple of times and then she walked out with her bag and set it down.  When she saw down beside him on the couch he looked at her.

“I’m sorry too.” He replied and she looked at him confused.  “Sorry I didn’t call and talk to you about what was going on, I just thought…”

“That I was mad, I get it.” She replied with a light smile.

“Plus you know me…” He said.

“Stubborn as an Ox.” She replied with a sigh and he smiled.  He watched as she looked down at her nails.  “I was getting a little worried I had pushed you to far, that maybe after everything you wanted this to be permanent.”

“I never ever wanted this to be permanent; I just didn’t know what to do anymore.” He said remembering.  “I was terrified I was going to lose you again.”

Just then the door opened and Nadia came walking in with Kevin behind her.  When she walked over to them she saw the bag on the floor and looked at the both of them.  AJ looked over to Kevin and saw the look on his face; he had seen the bag too.

“What’s goin’ on?” He asked as he looked from Chelsea to AJ.

“We’ve been talking this whole time and we’ve decided that she’s going to come home.”

“Today?” Nadia asked with a smile and AJ nodded.  “Awesome I’m going to go tell Kris.” And with that she was gone.

“Are you two sure about this?” Kevin asked with concern.

“Yes” Chelsea nodded.  “I need to go back so I can move on.” She told him and AJ could tell that was enough of a satisfying answer for Kevin.

“Well say goodbye before you leave then.” Kevin said with a light smile and then left the guest house.

“So” He said looking back to her.  “Need anything else?”

“No, I’m ready to go.” She replied and then he smiled before he walked over and picked up her bag. 

“Let’s head home then.” He said to her and she smiled with a light nod.