Battleground
Chapter 1
Katie walked up to Nick between classes and leaned against the locker next to his, waiting for him to realize she was there. He finally finished putting the books he would need in his bag and turned to look at her. He gave her that lazy smile usually caused the butterflies to stir in stomach, but she tried to steel herself against her body’s usual reaction. He leaned over, trying to give her a soft kiss on the lips, but she turned her head away, causing the kiss to land on her cheek instead.
He slowly stood up straight, realizing something was up. “What’s wrong Kit Kat?” he asked, reaching a hand up and brushing hair off her face for her.
She silently handed him a note then turned to walk away. He stared after her for a minute before looking down at the note. She usually folded her notes to him in the shape of a heart, but that hadn’t been happening recently. They were just plain, and he was suddenly very afraid to open this one.
Nick sat down on the ground in front of his locker and unfolded the paper, his heart beating louder with every twist of the paper.
Nicky,
We need to talk. Meet me at the park after school?
Katie
Now he knew something was really wrong, and he was honestly just pissed off she didn’t straight up tell him. If she wanted to break up with him, she should have just told him and gotten it over with. She knew how much he hated games, so why was she playing them with him? If she wanted him to beg for her, he would.
Well, he probably would.
Wait, yes, yes he would beg for her. He knew if he didn’t, their friendship would probably be over as well. She was his oldest friend, and they had known each other since kindergarten. There was no way he was willing to throw away a twelve year friendship over a silly break up.
So yes, he would beg for her, but ultimately he would let her go. If it made her happy, that’s what he would do.
~*~*~*~*~*~
After school, Katie sat in the little alcove she and Nick had discovered and “conquered” years ago. To this day, the neighborhood kids were afraid to go near it for fear of suffering Nick’s wrath. She was clutching her journal to her chest, knowing everything she wanted to say to Nick was written inside. She just needed him to show up.
She wanted to look at her watch, but knew if she started checking the time now, she wouldn’t stop until Nick finally arrived. So, she took a deep breath and looked up at the clouds instead.
She felt her hands shaking and drew another deep breath, trying to calm her nerves, hoping she wouldn’t start to cry. If she started crying before he even got there, it’d be over, nothing would be said, and she would just chicken out and run away. She couldn’t chicken out, though.
Katie finally heard footsteps approaching and looked up, seeing Nick at the entrance to their private world. A single tear fell down her cheek as she whispered, “You came.”
“Of course I came. You asked me to, and you know I would do anything for you,” he said. He gently sat next to her and pulled her into his lap, reaching up to wipe away her tear. “Now, what’s going on? What did you need to talk about?”
Katie drew a shaky breath and whispered, “First, Nick, I love you, and I don’t want you to forget that.” She sniffled softly and wiped her nose on his shoulder, as she’d been doing since they were five.
“But?” he asked softly, rubbing her back.
“But-“ she started, then chickened out, drawing another deep breath. She closed her eyes, trying desperately to find the courage she had when she wrote the note asking him to come here.
“You’re unhappy?” he asked softly, trying to help her spit it out.
She nodded softly, burying her head in the crook of his neck.
“With me?” he whispered.
“Oh God, Nicky, no! Of course not! You’re the best boyfriend I could’ve asked for, you know that!” she said, pulling away to look in his eyes.
“Then what is it?” he asked softly. “What’s making you so unhappy?”
“I have to tell you something,” she whispered, opening her journal to remember exactly how she had planned to tell him.
“You’re breaking up with me,” he stated softly, closing the journal and setting it aside. He wanted this to be a real conversation, not just rehearsed.
Her head shot up, looking him in the eye, unable to deny it. “Nick,” she whispered, another tear falling down her cheek.
“I’m not upset,” he whispered, kissing her forehead out of habit. “Just… tell me… What did I do wrong?” he asked her, the vulnerability evident in his voice.
“Nick, you didn’t do anything wrong,” she started, but was interrupted by him.
“Then what is it?”
She drew another shaky breath and whispered, “I think I’m gay.” She buried her head in his neck, finally letting the sobs out.
Nick wrapped his arms around her, comforting her, unsure of exactly what she had said. When the words finally sunk in, he slowly pulled back and looked her in the eye. “Wait, you’re what?” he asked, still not sure he heard her correctly.
She wiped her nose on his shoulder again and sniffled, “I think I’m gay, Nick.”
This time the words hit him like a ton of bricks, and he was unable to keep from blurting out, “But you don’t play softball!”
Katie’s jaw dropped and she stared at him, absolutely dumbfounded. “What does that have to do with anything?” she asked, scooting off his lap.
“I just- I thought,” he paused, trying to gather his thoughts. “Don’t lesbians play softball and have short hair, look like boys, and don’t shave?” he asked. He was looking at her- well, scrutinizing her, actually- and it was starting to make her feel uncomfortable.
“Not all of them,” she said defensively. “Some are still pretty.”
“Oh,” he said weakly.
Katie drew a breath and looked back up at the sky, “You should know you’re wonderful.” She turned her attention back to him. “Nothing you did caused me to change. In reality,” she paused, trying to figure out how much to tell him, “this is something I’ve been struggling to figure out for years.”
“How many years?” he asked, curious.
“Remember when we were kids, how I always made you be my nurse when you, me, and Bec’s would play doctor?” she asked, starting to stare at her hands.
“Shit,” he muttered softly, realizing that was pretty much as long as he had known her. “Does anyone else know?”
Katie shook her head slowly, feeling more tears gathering in her eyes.
Nick slowly let a breath go and reached to pull her back into his lap. Katie shrunk away from him and whispered, “Nick, you can’t fix this. You can’t fix me.”
“I’m not trying to fix you, Kit Kat. There’s nothing wrong with you that needs to be fixed. I’m simply trying to show you my support.” He smiled softly before going on to explain, “You have a huge battle in front of you, and you need someone on your side. Just like you keep saying you love me, well guess what? I still love you, and you telling me this doesn’t change that at all. You are and always will be my best-friend.” He gently wiped away her tears that were falling before kissing her temple. “So does this mean we are no longer going to prom together?”
“That’s what you’re worried about?” she asked. Her idiot best-friend never ceased to amaze her, and she shook her head no.
“Of course I’m worried about that. My mom’s all ready looking forward to taking me shopping for your corsage. You’re not going to break her heart, are you?” he pleaded, knowing she couldn’t do that to his mom.
She rolled her eyes and tickled his weak spot, “Low blow, Carter.”
“I know, but seriously, Katie. We only have a few more months until we graduate, and I know how everyone treats Dana since she came out last year. I don’t want you to have to go through that. It might be easier to let everyone think we’re still dating, you know? No one will care when we’re in college, and if they do, they can answer to me. Let’s just get through the year?” he asked softly.
Katie sighed, thinking about his proposal. After several seconds, she shook her head no, “I can’t ask you to do that, Nicky. What if you meet someone before the school year is over?”
“Who am I going to meet? We’ve been in the same school with the same people since first grade,” he started to argue.
“But what if you meet someone at a game or something?” she interjected.
“Then she probably goes to a different school, and it would be hard to see her anyway. Plus, she’s probably going to a different college, and it wouldn’t get past the summer. Speaking of college, though, you haven’t changed your mind on college, have you?” he asked, looking in her eyes.
She shook her head no, “Don’t worry, I’m still going to University of Colorado with you, that hasn’t changed.”
“Good. So it’s settled?” he asked.
“Fine, I’ll pretend to be your girlfriend, and I’ll go to prom with you. But I won’t sleep with you anymore, that’s just too weird,” she said, making a face.
“What’s wrong with sex with me?” he asked, sounding wounded.
“Nicky, I like chicks, not dicks. DO you not remember the conversation we’ve been having for the last ten minutes? Remember I told you I was gay?” she laughed, punching his shoulder.
“So long as that’s the reason, and it’s not because you think I’m bad in bed or something,” he laughed, hugging his friend again.
She rolled her eyes before mumbling, “Heaven forbid I bruise your little ego.” She looked him in the eye, a soft smile forming. “Thank you for not hating me,” she whispered before leaning her head on his shoulder.
“Never” he mumbled, pulling her closer.
